Walking away from the pizzeria with her arms folded, Saphira knew she needed to just take this moment to calm her mind and breath in the fresh air. She was allowing herself to get too anxious to the point she almost had a full blown panic attack. She sobbed softly as she walked to the path leading away from the pizzeria, but she knew she would not go too far. She would just walk around the block, but she might do that a few times in case she needed that extra time. And she honestly felt like that she did.
I feel like such an idiot. I am hurting him, and hurting myself by doing this. But I am so scared of what Afton wants, and I know that if I allow myself to say yes to my feelings, I am only playing into his hand. Even if Springtrap and I love each other, I wish Afton was gone so we could embrace it. But I know it won't happen for a long time.
Saphira was honestly in conflict with herself. And she knew it. She was allowing herself to have that barrier there to prevent herself from falling in love with Springtrap. But she knew that she was in love with him, she was just not letting herself pursue it. She felt like she was doing it for both their sakes, but she still felt like she was just too afraid. She was scared of Afton, that was the root of it.
Saphira stared at the cement and kicked a rock as she kept to the darkness under the shade of the trees so she would not get spotted. Her mind was going through everything right now, and she honestly was at a loss of how to proceed. She knew that she had to outwit Afton somehow, but she didn't really know where to begin yet. And she knew she may not get the chance when she turns eighteen. She was given a time limit after all.
Saphira clenched her eyes shut for a moment and shook her head. She honestly wished she could tell someone. But who would believe her? She would be locked away in a mental institution, and Afton will probably still find a way to reach her and kill her. She was pretty much on her own without anyone by her side. At least, no one who was human.
The animatronics were the ones who stood by her, and she knew it. They have stood by her since they learned the truth of her past, and have done their best to try and make up for it too. Bonnie has been like a father to her, Fredbear was kind of like a granddad, Toy Bonnie was like the fun brother and Toy Chica like a sister…and Nightmare has also become like a protective, older brother to her too. She has the support she needs around her.
Maybe I really am just…digging an empty hole for myself…I am just so scared that I lose Springtrap if I say yes to our feelings…but I don't even know if that is what will happen.
Saphira doubted Afton would kill Springtrap as soon as the two of them became official, but it was possible. And Saphira knew she was basing her fear mostly on Afton, and the assumptions of what he is going to do. She did know she might be wrong, and she was only hurting herself and Springtrap in the process. Saphira didn't really know what to do, and she felt like she might need someone to talk to.
Her thoughts were pushed aside for a moment as she felt the drops of rain hitting her skin. She grumbled a little as this was the cliché moment, but at least the rain would also provide another form of cover, and it actually felt nice. At least for the moment. She knew she could have a shower when she gets back to warm up, and hope that she would not catch a cold in the process.
Saphira kicked another rock in her path as she continued to walk while thinking about everything. She has honestly not really had a chance to think everything over. She was often focused on Afton's next move, and what she should do to try get ahead, or do something that might benefit him more than her and the animatronics. But she has not sorted her own thoughts and feelings because of everything else that has been going on.
And with me being kicked out of home, and essentially getting the blame for the accident along with Jeremy, I haven't had much time to think. But Springtrap has a lot of time to think. He must think a lot during the day too. I honestly should have been thinking about my thoughts and feelings too.
Saphira let out another sob, and tensed as the rain began to pour harder, soaking through her clothes very quickly. She shivered as she kept her arms folded, breathing in the scent of the rain around her. She still did not feel ready to go back just yet. She felt like she had to keep walking and thinking, though it was very hard to ignore the cold setting in around her body with drenched clothes, and the wind blowing around her was not helping either.
Saphira sighed as she glanced towards the pizzeria, knowing that she was worrying all of the animatronics right now. They probably were tempted to leave, especially with the rain now falling, but they wouldn't know where to go. And the rain has probably washed her scent away as well, which would not be helpful if they were to try and find her. But their senses were sharp, so they probably would find her, since she did not go very far.
I am really going to have to apologize to all of them. Especially Springtrap. Maybe I should tell him my truth feelings. It just wouldn't be the right time now. Maybe another time? But when is the right time going to even happen? I don't want to keep hurting him, and it hurts me a lot with how much I love him. If only things were different.
But maybe it didn't have to be. Saphira really felt stuck with no way out at the moment. She wanted to embrace Springtrap completely, but she also did not want to. It was a conflict of the heart and mind, that was for sure. Saphira looked back at the pizzeria as she thought about Springtrap. She knew he would be hurting a lot right now, but he would also be scared that something will happen to her out here. She sighed to herself and kept walking.
After another ten minutes of walking, Saphira stopped underneath a tree and moved closer to the trunk as she spotted a group of people in the distance. She didn't see how many there were exactly, but she could see them, and she hoped that they did not notice her. The group were walking along the path by the car park, which was a lot further than where she was as she was closer to the pizzeria, but they might still be able to see her if they paid attention.
Saphira stuck close to the trunk as she watched the group walk along the path. At least it was very dark, but the lights by the parking lot allowed her to see their silhouettes. She wasn't near any light, so she might be lucky. And if they did happen to spot her, Saphira knew she could get to the pizzeria before they could catch her. But she did know they might enter the pizzeria through the side window to try and get her. At least the animatronics would get something out of it.
Saphira wiped the strands stuck to her cheeks away and kept staring. The group continued walking along the path and Saphira remained still and hiding by the trunk. She was quite willing to be patient in waiting for them to walk away. But she began to have a bad feeling, and she knew that meant that she should trust her gut. This possibly was already very bad, and Saphira was just standing there waiting.
She looked back at the pizzeria for a moment before quietly grabbing her keys out. She was closer to the front entrance than the back entrance into the pizzeria right now, so if she was to make a run for it, she was going to have to go through the front entrance. The group will most certainly see her if she does that, but she didn't have a choice if she wanted to get into the pizzeria without them grabbing her and pulling her away from the pizzeria. That would be the worst case scenario.
Saphira took a deep breath while she shivered in the rain. At the very least, she would be able to have a shower. Plus, Saphira knew she has been out of the pizzeria long enough. She was cold, and she felt her nose tingling, and she knew she was going to start sneezing soon. She didn't know if the group will run after her as soon as they see her, but that didn't matter as long as she reached the door first.
She slowly moved closer to the building to give her a closer distance to the pizzeria before she began to run over to the front entrance. She heard a shout from one of the people in the group, and she noticed that it was a woman shouting at her. That didn't matter. She ran towards the front entrance as fast as possible and grabbed the door handle once she reached the front. She unlocked it quickly and opened the door to step inside.
She looked back to see the group were running towards the building as she locked the door, making sure that they could not just open the door and walk inside. She sighed deeply as she felt better, even though the group probably will enter through the side window anyway. She stepped back from the door and folded her arms, shivering as she really noticed the cold front her damp clothes.
She walked through the archway into the main dining room where she saw Freddy, Bonnie, Chica, Foxy, Fredbear, Nightmare, Toy Bonnie, Mangle and Phantom Chica all standing in the room, looking at her with worry. Saphira immediately looked down at the ground as she felt like she was a child being scrutinized by adults for doing something wrong, even though she did walk out of the building when she was having an anxiety attack.
"I'm sorry." That was all she could muster.
"You have to do more than that, Saphira," Bonnie said in a gentle, yet stern tone, making her flinch. "I don't know what happened, but you should go and take a shower." She flinched as she heard him walking over to her. He placed his hand on her shoulder gently. "I think you and I need to have a little talk. Springtrap is in the bathroom again in the hallway, in case you were wondering. You worried all of us with your little stunt."
Saphira wanted to repeat that she was sorry, but she knew that wouldn't matter to them. She sighed and nodded without looking at Bonnie. "Okay…and, um, you m-might get trespassers…there was a group out there just before I got inside." Bonnie glanced towards the front entrance, though he did not see anyone. He did beloved her though. "Um…I'll be in my room…"
Saphira walked around Bonnie to make her way to the door. She feel the eyes of the animatronics following her as she walked through the dining room. It wasn't a pleasant feeling as she knew that she worried everyone, and they were not pleased with what she had done. Regardless, Saphira wanted to have a shower. She was tempted to go and speak with Springtrap, but it was probably best to leave him be. After all, she knew that she needed to have someone else to talk to.
She opened the door to the hallway and made her way down the hallway towards the closet. Saphira kept her eyes to the floor as she walked towards her room. She did feel guilty for walking out, even though she had been able to collect her thoughts and feelings. A shower at least would allow her to do that even further and she didn't know how long she would be in the shower as well. But it was one in the morning currently, so she had been walking around outside the pizzeria for an hour.
Saphira walked into the closer to head down the stairs to her room. As she walked into her room, she yelped and jumped back when she heard a loud banging suddenly as she walked into her room. But she quickly noticed that there was a vintage, clapping monkey with cymbals. Saphira shook her head as the clapping as loud, and she hated those toys. They were always creepy to her.
She walked over to the bed to grab the toy and throw it against the wall to stop it from clapping. She ended up breaking the face of the toy from hitting the brick wall. She sighed as she placed her hand on her chest to try and calm her racing heart. She took deep breaths and she frowned at the monkey before looking at the vent. This had to be Afton's doing. The animatronics wouldn't have done this, so Afton would have been the one to do it.
"Saphira?" She jumped and turned around as she heard footsteps running down the stairs when she heard Bonnie's voice. "Are you okay? We heard you scream and the sound of banging." The animatronic entered the room, and he spotted the monkey on the floor. "Oh, it's one of those things."
Saphira nodded. "Afton left it." She walked over to her bedside table to grab out some clean underwear. "I guess he's as impressed with me walking out as you are."
Bonnie didn't react to that. He walked over to pick up the toy and held it in his palm while he looked over it. "I remember when they made Fredbear versions of these." Saphira looked at him in surprise as she didn't know that. "They never really sold. I don't blame them. Fredbear has a large, wide mouth compared to most of us, so you can imagine how a toy version of him would have looked with these cymbals. Not exactly the most friendly looking toy that was made, even if Fredbear isn't that intimidating."
Saphira smiled as she could easily picture a Fredbear toy like that monkey. It actually would be quite creepy. She never knew they made one, but it wouldn't be something she would have wanted anyway, so she wasn't missing out on it. "I can see that. At least they didn't try again with another version. That can just be thrown in the bin."
Bonnie nodded in agreement and looked at Saphira as she walked towards her wardrobe. He could hear her teeth chattering from the cold she was feeling. Bonnie could see in Saphira's eyes that she had a lot of guilt and pain in them. "I was going to come in here after you've showered, but I guess it won't be necessary." Saphira grimaced a little and sniffled. "What are you doing?" She looked at him in surprise. "It is no secret to anyone here that you and Springtrap have a connection, Saphira. Yet it seems that you are holding back. I am not sure why. Springtrap was…he isn't happy."
Saphira knew that. She felt very guilty for doing that to him. "So…you all know that he and I…have feelings towards each other?" Bonnie nodded affirmatively. Saphira bit her bottom lips and sniffled while she let her tears falls. "Bonnie, I don't know what to do. I fell like I am stuck in a corner with no way out. That is what I am feeling, and it really, really hurts. Because…I don't want to go forward because I am afraid. I'm afraid of what he will do."
Bonnie's ears droop slightly as he listened to Saphira. "You are afraid of Afton." She nodded and looked down at the ground. "I understand. But I also think you should not allow his presence influence your decision. You and Springtrap have loved each other since you were a child. That love has since matured now that you came back to the horror attraction." Saphira frowned a little as she knew that was also true. "Of course, it needed a lot of healing…and there might still be a lot of healing that has to happen. But you should not allow the fear of someone else get in the way."
Saphira sniffled again and sneezed suddenly as she listened to him. "I know…but…I am just…I don't know what to do. I want to say yes, but I also don't want to say it. I am hurting both of us, I know…but…"
Bonnie walked closer to Saphira with a kind smile. "It is not unreasonable for you to be afraid, Saphira. The fact that you want to protect him from your own love, shows the deep love you have for him anyway." She whimpered a little and let out another light sob. "But Afton can and will hurt you and him, regardless of what the two of you decide to do, Saphira. He does not require you and he to confess love to get his way. You already know he will find another way." She nodded in agreement with that statement. "And because you know that, you should really allow yourself to open up to him. You aren't a child anymore, Saphira. I am sure a part of you still wishes for that childlike moment from the past, but that will never happen again."
"I know." Saphira wiped her cheeks, wiping the tears mixed with the rain on her cheeks. "I guess…I am also afraid like a child."
"Maybe. But I don't think so." He placed his hand on her shoulder gently and pulled her in for a hug, making her wrap her arms around him. He ignored the water dripping from her clothes, as Bonnie knew it would not hurt him. "You have a lot of pain and trauma behind you, Saphira. You lost friends, you lost your family, and I guess a part of wonders why that happened." She nodded as she buried her face into his chest. He rubbed her back gently as she began to sob harder into his chest. "The fact that you have managed to be as brave as you have been, it actually shows the strength you have within you. Being afraid doesn't make you a coward, Saphira. Look at what you've done, even when you believe you are a coward."
Saphira thought over the achievements she has done while she has been here. True, Saphira managed to befriend the nightmare animatronics, and she also snuck out to the pizzeria to see them while some of the animatronics were still within their pods in the truck. She snuck into Afton's property just to get answers about the existence of the animatronics. She has found secret areas in the building by accident, and she has learned more about Afton. But she didn't think she was that brave.
"Am I really as brave as you say?"
Bonnie nodded. "Of course. I believe in what I am saying, Saphira. You are brave. And I admire you for it." That surprised her as she didn't think that the animatronics would admire her for anything. "You are brave trying to even hold in your feelings, even though it is hurting you and Springtrap." She grimaced and sniffled a little as she knew that was true. "But I believe it would be braver if you allowed yourself to say yes. You and Springtrap were made for each other, as far as I am concerned. You both seem to be outcasts in this world, even though we animatronics never outcasted Springtrap. Only the humans did. But you did not, which resulted in you eventually being outcasted as well."
Saphira never really thought of it that way. And looking back on it, Bonnie was right. She was outcasted by her friends, and now her parents. And the only people who took her in were the animatronics. Springtrap was outcasted by guests when he first arrived, and she was drawn to him as a child. Maybe Bonnie was right, and they were made for each because of those reasons. Saphira certainly had a different perspective on it all now.
"Think about, Saphira. You and Springtrap have a special connection. One I don't I'll ever understand." He gently pulled back and lifts her chin gently so she could look at him. "And I am happy for you both, just so you know." She smiled as she knew that he was saying that likely because she saw him like a father figure. "Alright, I've held you up long enough. You are shivering so much." She nodded as she really wanted a shower, and she sneezed again, making Bonnie frown. "Hmm…if you get a cold, blame me. Go and have a shower. Springtrap's been informed you returned…" Bonnie paused and turned his head as he and Saphira heard the sound of shouting echoing through the pizzeria. "Huh…we must have trespassers…"
"Yeah…" Bonnie looked back at Saphira when she responded casually. "I…I saw the group before I came into the pizzeria…they were going to follow me anyway, so…" She shrugged and stepped back from him. "I guess you're welcome."
"That's concerning, not good. If they were able to get you…" Bonnie shook his head with a shudder of his body. "I don't want to think about it. But…" Bonnie frowned and turned his body a little as he listened to the sounds. "I think I need to go and help. It sounds like there are a lot more than expected." Saphira wanted to say that she didn't know how many there were, but she knew that there were more than five in that group. "At least you got back on time. I'll make sure that they don't come down. Go for that shower, and think about what I said."
Saphira didn't respond at first as Bonnie walked towards the door. "I will, Bonnie." He stopped and glanced at her before smiling at her. "I think you are right. I…I really needed to hear your words tonight, Bonnie…you are the one who I know can help me when things are hard." The animatronic nodded as he was pleased to hear that. "But Springtrap might become that if I do go ahead."
"That does not bother me. I only want you to be happy, Saphira. Yes, Afton will be here. And maybe he will be cheering. He obviously thought you screwed up by having this…" He held up the clapping monkey and she shuddered upon seeing it. "Ready to set off in your room like that. And he had fun most likely. But you will let him win, if you just do nothing as well."
Saphira smiled at him as she was grateful. She looked at the door to the bathroom before she ran over to Bonnie again, surprising the bot and making him turn to face her again as she threw her arms around him. He smiled as he could tell she was extremely grateful for his words, and he was glad that he made her feel better. "You are right, Bonnie. I have been letting fear cover my eyes. I don't know if I will…say yes tonight…um…I will find the right time. I think Springtrap will not believe it."
"You would be right. Give it a bit of time, Saphira. I believe after Halloween, things might get a bit worse. For you, I mean." She did not know what he meant by that, but she was concerned. "I only say this because that is what Fredbear thinks too. And if that bruise on your face was by that girl, Hayley, as you informed Springtrap, I expect her to come here." Saphira wasn't surprised that the animatronic found out about that. Springtrap would have told them. "I am not sure of her connection to Afton, but if she comes back, we will know and we will deal with her. After all, I am certain she will come here only to hurt you."
Saphira did not respond. She knew that was likely the case, but it was best not to respond. She sniffled and stepped back from Bonnie. "You'd better…" She paused with a start as she heard a high-pitched scream that seemed to be closer to her room. "Ow…" She rubbed her ears a little with a grimace. "Bonnie, can you please deal with that? I don't want to hear anything."
"Already on it!" Bonnie responded to her as he walked away briskly to head up the stairs to leave and close the door behind him, blocking out the sound. "Make sure you get yourself warm, Saphira. I'll inform you later when things are okay up here."
Saphira sighed in relief knowing she wouldn't be able to hear what was happening upstairs. She turned and ran into the bathroom as she really needed to shower as she was freezing. Bonnie had kept her from it long enough. And once she stripped her clothes, she felt better as the cold, damp clothes kept her cold. And she felt even better once she was under the showerhead as the steaming water washed over her cold body. She felt the heat around her body as she warmed up underneath the water. She smiled as she felt so much better, even if it didn't stop her from sneezing.
She took the time to stand and think about what Bonnie had said to her seriously. She stared at the ground as she rests her forehead on the glass of the shower while she thought about his words. Everything he said resonated with her, and she honestly did not want to let him down at all by not thinking everything over. But she already knew in her heart that he was right. He was right that she really loved Springtrap so much. It really did hurt to love someone so much, but feel like there was a barrier right in front.
Maybe if I wasn't so laser focused on Afton and his plans, then…maybe I wouldn't have been this way…and sure, I still worry about Springtrap and what he might do if we do embrace each other. But I trust him, and I love him with all my heart. I need to make it up to him. But how?
Saphira also knew that she was going to have to work on getting closer to Springtrap again. She knew he might pull away from her for a while, and she honestly understood. If he needed that distance to gather his thoughts, that was okay. She wasn't going to hold it against him at all. It will make her feel guilty, but Saphira knew it was better to not force it. After all, if he believed she was mocking him, it would only hurt him more. And she did not want that.
I will find a way to make things right between us, Springtrap. You waited so long for me, and I am just pushing you away. I didn't want to, but I think, believing it was right for now. But I guess I would lose you forever if I don't stop now. I will not let Afton get between us again, I promise. I will walk with you, like I should have done, and I hope that…by the time I am eighteen, you and I will be closer again.