A Certain One-Eyed Mage
By: Bubbajack
Editors/Co-Authors: IcySnowSage, First Hassan
First Chapter Disclaimer: We DO NOT OWN the following: The Classic World of Darkness setting, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, the Nasuverse, Triage-X, or the Riordan-verse. They all belong to their respective owners.
Ch.1: Welcome to the Masquerade.
The sun was rapidly fading across the Serengeti, as the man, a leather eyepatch over one eye, his clothes rolled up on his arms and legs, with his skin tanned and leathery from being exposed to constant heat of the African sun, came onto a small village. He carried on him beside a canteen, a long branch of whittled oak, its ends sharpened like a spear.
The children ran out from their huts to greet the stranger hoping to beg for some food. He smiled, rubbed their heads and passed on a few ration bars he had on him before asking, "Wisewoman, Akadi here?"
The children nodded in affirmation before pointing to a thatch roofed hut with an old cast iron pot out front and several chickens running around pecking at the dry ground for grubs.
Approaching the hut, the man knocked respectfully, "Wisewoman Akadi are you home?"
"Where else would I be white man?" an elderly woman with a shawl, wrapped around her neck along with a necklace, bangles, and anklets of what Alexander Lavelle Harris hoped were just chicken bones. She peered at him suspiciously, "You have seen much for one so young, not like those foolish tourists that come round on occasion? What brings you here boy?"
"I was recommended to come see you by Chief Utuwabe?" The man replied. "He said you'd understand if I brought up his name."
The elderly woman blinked, "Utuwabe? He sends you?" Seeing him nod, she motioned him inside, "Come in, come in."
Entering the hut, Xander saw a small fire in the center over which a pot hung, and shelves on the walls were filled with all manner of things Xander didn't know the names of, but he could guess. 'She might be a genuine magician,' Xander thought to himself.
"Tell me, how is that old fool of a man doing?" She asked as she pulled out a mortar and pestle and began crushing some leaves in it.
"Doing well he almost got shot the other day, when some less than savory types tried to 'ask' his people to come work in the nearby diamond mines. I 'convinced them' they should go looking somewhere else."
That made the woman chuckle. "That is why he sends you to me. He sees the potential of a warrior in you," Staring at him keenly she asked, "How many men did you take?"
"Six, all armed with automatic weapons, all I had was this spear of mine, my wits and the nearby tallgrass," Xander admitted. He didn't like hunting people like common vamps, but that didn't mean he wasn't capable of it. Hell, it was child's play for him to kill humans compared to hunting vampires. Vampires were always stronger, faster, and with keener senses. It showed that in a fairer fight he was the better fighter simply due to all those years of fighting superior opponents.
"Impressive," the wisewoman noted, "You have seen beyond the veil have you not? Of the man-faced jackals that prowl outside in the shadows at night, hoping to prey on the unwary?"
Grimacing, Xander nodded, "Yes ma'am."
Again the woman nodded as she put more ingredients into the bowl and crushed them, "Yes, now it all makes sense, why Utuwabe sent you to me. He wishes to see if I can unlock your potential,"
"My potential?" Xander asked as he watched her pour alcohol into the bowl and light the concoction on fire, the vapors it produced were thick and cloying.
Passing the bowl over to him, Madame Akadi said, "Breathe deep warrior, and let your spirit fly free."
Doing so Xander felt a tremor come from the very core of his being as he inhaled. The last thing he heard was the old woman say, "Good luck on your vision quest, young warrior."
(...)
Xander saw gears turning, cogs shifting, pistons moving up and down, wires being tugged, and transmitting current to the proper place at the proper time. All was in perfect synch, all was in flawless harmony, the world, the universe, the very cosmos… was a flawless machine, moving in perfect serendipity… until it wasn't. He watched as on a macro-scale the world became distorted. Gears rusted shut, pistons gummed up refusing to move, cogs didn't turn, electrical current didn't fluctuate. He zoomed in from his universal level view and saw the cause.
A Spider. A piece in the Great Machine had ceased functioning properly. In its malfunctioning state, its woven wires had trapped the three-headed dragon, one that consumed all, an entropic force. With its imprisonment came madness, meanwhile, the creative force, though weakened, ran wild with nothing to keep in check. This led to a domino effect. The more parts failed on a smaller level, the more parts would fail on a higher level until all of existence collapsed. Xander, as a carpenter, as a builder couldn't allow this. Knowing what he knew now, he had to do something but what?
He saw them then. Those who were sitting above all of creation. Looking down on it. As if amused by it all. "Do something about this!" He shouted at them. "It's all falling apart!"
The entities or whatever they were didn't expect him to shout at them. Yet he got their attention all the same. They numbered eleven in all and looked for the most part androgynous in appearance. All save two. An old man, and a young woman.
One of the androgynous ones who sat upon a throne of storm clouds pointed at him; moments later, he was stuck with a lightning bolt. Like Icarus before him, Xander found himself flying too close to the sun, and was crashing back to earth as a result. His reality of gears, cogs, and shafts came up to meet him seconds before he closed his eyes.
(...)
Xander sat bolt upright in bed, his body covered in a layer of sweat. 'Wait, a bed? Last I recall, I was in Africa,' Warily Xander looked around the room, it was well furnished with antique furnishings. He was laying in an oak four poster bed with a red silk canopy, with wood and brass handled dressers lining one side of the room and a full body mirror set in bronze next to a drape covered window. Going over to it, Xander looked at himself in the mirror, he didn't see any bite marks on his person, and he didn't feel possessed. 'So not a vamp, not hypnotized, and not possessed again, that's good,' He thought, 'Now where the fuck am I?' He froze as stiff as a board when he heard a tired feminine moan coming from the bed.
A head of light lilac hair untangled itself from the sheets. It belonged to a rather buxom violet-eyed girl who looked to be about Dawnie's age. Staring at him blearily she asked, "Xander, what's wrong why're you out of bed so early?"
'Whelp, I belong on a watch list now,' Xander thought to himself mainly because the girl was naked, unashamedly so due to the fact she let the sheets fall from her form giving him a good few of her bosom. Looking away, he said, "Could you cover yourself please?"
Doing as asked, the girl inquired, "Master, are you alright?"
'Master? Just what the fuck is going on here?' The monster hunter thought to himself. "Umm… no? I am gonna be completely honest. I have no idea how I got here or who you are. Care to fill me in?"
The girl looked surprised for a moment before the biggest brightest smile illuminated her face and she launched herself at him in a flying hug, knocking him to the floor as she crushed the life out of him. "You're awake! Oh, thank Caine! The Lord will be so pleased!"
"Right, so who are you again?" Xander asked.
The girl, still naked and straddling him, replied, "I am your personal bodyguard, a Szlachta created by the Lord. He is a powerful Cainite of Clan Tzimisce."
Xander filed all the unknown terminology away for later, "Okay, but what's your name?"
The girl quickly replied, "I don't have one, the Lord said you would provide me one once you awoke from your trance, and I was to guard you and see to your needs until then."
"Right… and why were you naked in bed with me?" Xander questioned.
"Is sexual gratification not also considered a need, Master?" the lilac-haired girl asked innocently. "The Kine have a primal urge to spread their seed do they not?"
Xander took a breath, then let it out before speaking, "How about you go get dressed, and then go get this Lord of yours, and let him/her know I'm awake and would like to speak to him?"
"Of course!" The girl hopped up and began collecting her clothes. Xander noted she dressed rather conservatively. So much so, you couldn't tell she was such a shortstack. Once she was dressed, in a black dress white sweater and flats, she raced out the door calling behind her, "Get dressed quickly master! Once I inform the Lord, he shall arrive quickly and it would be improper to meet him in the nude."
Xander found underwear easily enough, and a cotton shirt along with dress pants. 'Wait a second, butler attire… don't tell me,' he thought. 'Think about it later Xander find your eyepatch now,' So thinking he checked the nearby nightstand and found it laying there, it was different from what he recalled. Before it was just a piece of black leather, now it was embossed with the symbol of a serpent eating its own tail in solid gold.
He didn't get time to ponder this as the door burst open and as he suspected, Dracula stood there staring at him in something akin to wonder. "Alexander? Is that you? Are you alright?"
"Draq, what the hell am I doing here man? Did you Renfield me again, man?" Xander asked with a sigh in his tone.
The vampire just laughed and moved forward and hugged him. "Alexander! My friend! You are back to your old self. I was growing most concerned at how you were acting."
Leaning back in case he went for his neck, the hunter replied, "Back to myself? Whatcha mean Draq?"
"You showed up at my castle in a trance some months ago. Well perhaps trance was not the correct term. What is that phrase you kine use these days? Stoned out of your mind I think it is?" The vampire nodded to himself. "Yes that was it, you were totally baked dude."
"Don't do that," Xander told him.
The vamp apologized, "Sorry, I'm just trying to be hip as the thinbloods say these days."
Xander shook his head, "No stop just stop. You're supposed to be this badass haughty aristocrat of unimaginable dark powers. You trying to act like a seventies hipster is just ruining your image man."
"Thank you Alexander, I needed to hear that," he said, slumping a bit before he took a seat on the bed while Xander took a seat in a nearby wicker chair. "In truth, I've just embraced a young woman, a former police officer who stumbled onto something she shouldn't have and… As a result, I'm feeling… a few centuries behind the times."
"Ohh, harsh," Xander replied, "I've got a lot of questions as I'm sure you can imagine."
"Of course my friend, shall we converse more over breakfast?" Vlad offered.
Xander rubbed the back of his head, "As long as I'm not the main course, and you mean actual food, sure."
The Impaler of Wallachia laughed, "We only dine on the blood and flesh of our enemies on Tuesdays, today is Wednesday."
"Lucky me," Xander replied, "I'll see you in ten? I'd like to finish getting dressed first,"
"Of course my friend. Your Szlachta shall see you to the dining hall when you are ready," Vlad informed him before he departed the room.
(...)
The girl was waiting just outside the door after he'd finished getting dressed. She looked him up and down before saying, "Master, just what do you call what you're wearing?"
Xander had adorned himself with a dark brown almost black leather duster coat he found in the closet along with a pair of thick boots upon finding the armoire in the room, he slapped a hand-axe and a Saxknife through a sword frog on either hip and opened the door.
"Business casual," Xander replied calmly. "Dining hall, which way?"
Giving a sigh, the girl replied, "This way please," She led him down the hall, one filled with macabre art that looked like it was painted with human blood, entrails, and bones. Glancing at him sideways as he looked at the art pieces in morbid fascination she said, "You know, the Lord could see your bearing of weapons as a provocation to a duel?"
"I just want Draq to know I'm not going to be pushed around. No more buttmonkey damnit!" He stopped and said, "Ah! That reminds me! Mattia Kyrielight."
"What?" the girl asked.
"Your name, Mattia, or Tia for short. It's the feminine form of the Italian Mathais, the disciple who replaced Judas after his betrayal and Kyrielight or Holy light."
She looked away abashed, "I… are you sure that's appropriate for someone like me? I am a Szlachta, a flesh-crafted human, a homunculus for lack of a better term. Do you really think I deserve a name so close to God?"
She suddenly found herself enveloped in her master's embrace. "You looked after me when I was weak and helpless, that… means a lot. So as far as I'm concerned you're my guardian angel, got it Mattia?"
"Yes Master. I, Mattia Kyrielight, will continue to protect you and light your path."
A pleasant silence descended over the two as she led the way to the dining hall, their hands gently intertwined the whole way there.
(...)
The dining hall consisted of a long table made out of a bone white substance, with high chairs that looked like they were fashioned from human rib cages, and topped with skulls that were twisted in forms of indescribable agony. Thick black drapes were drawn across the windows and the hall was instead lit by candelabras, kerosine lamps, the scent of which prevailed the hall, and a trio of candle lit chandeliers that hung from old iron chains.
The table was laden with all manner of food on half of it from soups, to ribs, to a whole roasted pig with an apple stuffed in its mouth, the other half was barren and was big enough to seat two dozen people. Dracula rose when he and Mattia entered, raising a crystal goblet Xander was fairly certain wasn't filled with red wine.
Sitting on his left was a woman with messy copper red, almost orange hued hair, a chest big enough to poke an eye out, and crimson red eyes. She seemed to be uncomfortably swirling crimson liquid in her own crystal goblet.
"Alexander to my right please," He then motioned to Mattia with a wave of his hand, "Szlachta, you are dismissed,"
Mattia bowed and made to leave, only for Xander to pull out a chair on his left and said, "Why don't you introduce yourself properly before you sit down?"
The Szlachta looked between her Master and her Lord before bowing to her Lord and saying, "I am Mattia Kyrielight, please forgive me, my Lord, but this lowly and unworthy one will be taking a seat."
She promptly sat down ignoring the Dragon's gaze.
Instead of being incised Dracula just laughed, "I see so she is Mattia is she Alexander?"
Taking his own seat, Xander replied with, "Yep, hope you don't mind if she joins us? She did look after me while I was out of it after all?"
The Dragon of Wallachia smiled indulgently, "Of course not. Good servants are to be rewarded," He then spoke to the Szlachta, "Mattia Kyreilight,"
The girl's head popped up, "Y-yes my Lord?!"
Dracula reached out and patted her head, "You have done your job well, and this is your just reward as deemed by your master. Continue to do well, and you shall earn more rewards," He spread his arms wide and said, "Now, feel free to eat to your heart's content."
"Thanks Draq," Xander said as he served himself some roasted pig and what he assumed were lamb shanks.
"You are welcome my friend," He then noticed his faux-pas, "Ah but introductions! Alexander Lavelle Harris, this is Konomi Suzue, the police girl I mentioned earlier."
Xander sent her a salute with his crystal goblet full of water, "Ma'am."
In response, she sent him a smile that was more akin to a grimace, "Harris-san," She moved to drink only to pull back at the last second.
Dracula tutted, "You must drink my childe, failure to do so could result in you going into a frenzy, releasing your inner Beast. Vitae is life itself to us Cainites. More than that, it keeps us sane,"
Xander grimaced as a human himself, he spent his life hunting down bloodsuckers, but over the years he'd gained a sort of… empathy for monsters as well, thanks to Anya. 'Anya…' he thought sadly. The reason he'd gone to Africa in the first place was to mourn and to forget her loss. Then it morphed into becoming more capable, so that, even if he were the 'normal one' he at least wouldn't be the 'Zeppo' anymore. He'd be more useful than the guy who got doughnuts and cleaned up the mess with drywall and nails after the fight was all over. So he learned, in the Cradle of Human Civilization, ancient and near forgotten ways of fighting, stalking, survival, and herbcraft from the old tribes. Spears, knives, and blades became his preferred weaponry. Then came the vision quest.
"You should drink," Xander advised, "I dunno what this 'Beast' is but it sounds like the fucking Turok-Han, and I don't feel like fighting a savage primal vamp if I don't have to, thanks."
Dracula let out a hiss of disgust, "Alexander! You fought the primeval blood dregs?!"
"I got a few licks in," He confirmed, his pride still wounded over the fact that Dawnie had tased him and driven back to the fight. It proved that 'the Zeppo' couldn't even do something as simple as keeping one girl safe even when asked. "Didn't you know the Hellmouth collapsed like, months ago?"
"I did not… but the stirring of the Anarchs, the Revolt, could they be correlated?" He muttered to himself.
Hearing him, Xander asked, "The Impaler say what?"
Sighing even though he didn't need to breathe, Vlad said, "My friend I have come to a decision, I wish to induct you into the Masquerade."
Chewing and swallowing his mouthful of food slowly Xander replied, "I'm guessing this isn't an invite to the latest masquerade ball is it?"
Vlad chuckled, "No it isn't my friend, The masquerade is the truth behind the curtain so to speak. You've already seen some of it. The truth of the supernatural, but… there is a truth behind that truth. A much greater, more profound, and darker truth."
"This has to do with all that terminology you guys were throwing around earlier wasn't it? Cainite, Kine, and all that?"
Vlad nodded seriously, "It does indeed. But, are you sure you wish to know? I feel the need to ask, for once you know, your worldview will be forever changed."
"Let me guess," Xander said holding up a finger, "Vampires, real ones, are descended from Cain the first murderer, they have some kind of secret bullshit cabal that are somehow running things behind the scenes, and humans are called Kine which is a term for cattle?"
Vlad blinked for a solid minute he just stared at Xander as if he'd just grown a second head. "I… yes, How did you know?"
"Context clues like Cainite and Kine, the mention of your Clan Tzimisce by Tia, meaning there is more than one Clan. And what with the supernatural being hidden from the public eye, it only makes sense for them to try and control everything from the shadows… it's what they did in the Blade movies anyway," Xander finished with a shrug.
"You are more or less correct, but there is more, much more."
"Werewolves, demons, mages, and Ghosts?" Xander guessed, "You forget Draq, I've already seen and done it all,"
The Tzimisce Vampire just laughed, "I clearly haven't been giving you nearly as much credit my young friend," he apologized, "Yes all that and more. A majority of the vampire clans are a part of a cabal known as the Camarilla. They consist of Clans Ventrue, Toreador, Tremere, Nosferatu, Malkavian, and Bruja at present. Formerly Clan Gangrel was a member until the turn of the millenia. I know these names mean nothing to you at present, but imagine clans, nests of vampires hundreds of thousands strong, the progenitors of which all survived the Great Flood, and spread out across Europe and North America then you'll have some idea of what power the Camarilla can bring to bear."
"Fuck…" Xander swore.
Vlad the Impaler nodded, "Indeed, I wish for you to understand so you do not needlessly go picking fights. Cainites or Kindred as they've taken to calling themselves these days," He said with some distaste, "Are far, far stronger than the blood demons you've been fighting up to this point. That said, they still have the same weaknesses. The Sun, a stake to the heart will paralyze but not 'dust' them, and beheading is fatal. Gutting one in the stomach is also potentially lethal as it is where we store our vitae, our blood."
"Why're you telling me your universal weaknesses Draq?" Xander inquired. "Not afraid I'll kill you in your sleep?"
The Tzimisce smirked, "You are many things Alexander my friend, but you are not dishonorable. You are currently in debt for my hospitality and will not kill me, this I know… besides you aren't the type to kill your friends."
"Yeah, you got me there," Xander admitted, "But still, isn't this like… betrayal of your species or something like that?"
The Lord of Wallichia scoffed, "Don't be ridiculous. These Kindred are no kin of mine. They turn their backs on Caine, on the history of the First City of Enoch, and fail to learn the lessons taught by the Book of Nodd."
"Which are?"
"That vampirism is neither a gift nor a curse, but a state between being and transcendence," Vlad replied, "Through the Vitae we understand life, shape it, and thus, must seek to transcend the mortal coil. That was the desire of Tzimisce Antediluvian, the founder and primordial of my Clan."
"Interesting," Xander commented, "As for how I ended up here, I went on a vision quest in Africa… I saw some things Draq… things that made everything just… click into place for me if that makes any kind of sense?" Xander glazed to his side, and saw Tia stuffing her mouth full of food like a chipmunk. "Swallow Tia, you'll choke."
Doing so, the girl replied, "Sorry master, I've never eaten before so this is all so new to me,"
"You mean you've never had food this good before right?" Xander corrected.
The homunculus shook her head, "No, I mean I have no requirement for self-sustenance. I am powered solely by the energy I pull from the earth,"
Xander rubbed his remaining eyes, "You… you just keep eating Tia, just make sure you chew and swallow your food alright?"
"Yes master… May I have some of your white cream for dessert? It's full of vitae."
"My white…?" Xander buried his head in his hands when he figured out what she was talking about, "No. No Tia. Not… Not at the table. It's rude to bring that up around company like that,"
Dracula blinked. "Back to what you were saying before Xander… could you have possibly Awakened?"
"Awakened to what?" the cyclopean carpenter asked.
"Magic," Vlad replied, "To use magic properly one must first Awaken to it. It sounds like during your vision quest, you had an awakening."
Now it was Xander's turn to blink stupidly, "But I've known magic exists for years man,"
The vampire shook his head, "Knowing and doing are two different things. Somewhat. You know magic exists, which is the first part, but each awakening is different for everyone. You might've known magic existed, but you didn't awaken to your own magical potential until the vision quest."
"Me? I can do magic?" Xander asked incredulously.
"I believe so, yes," Vlad confirmed, "What did you see during your vision?"
"A world, universe, cosmos of gears, cogs, machinery. Like it all was a giant machine or a super-sized swiss watch."
"Alright, Alexander, I want you to close your eyes… erm eye, and envision those gears and then open them again."
The hunter shrugged, he didn't see why not he couldn't humor the guy. So he closed his remaining eye, envisioned the world of machinery he saw. It was everywhere, it was everything. It was even him. Open his eyes again, he saw them. The gears and cogs were connected to everything, even floating spinning about lightly in the air, and burning in the candles as they flickered.
"Alexander? Alexander, what do you see?" Vlad asked.
Xander looked at him and saw a sea of gears, cogs, pistons, and wires, roiling like a small sea in his stomach. 'Vitae?' Xander wondered.
Reaching out he pulled a cord which was connected to all the candles in the room via a mess of turning gears, cogs and wire. When he pulled it, all the light sources in the room were simultaneously snuffed out and the dining hall was consumed by darkness. Pulling it again the flames flickered back to life as if Xander had just pulled a light switch.
Turning back to the surprised Dracula, he blinked dismissing the machinery world before saying, "I think I've got a lot to learn, Draq."
Standing and placing his hands on his shoulders Dracula said, "I think, I know how I might be able to help my friend, you require a teacher in the Artes. A different kind of Szlachta if you will. And I have a few ideas in mind. Just… just give me some time."
Swallowing, Mattia asked fretfully, "Am I being replaced? Am I no longer of use to the Master my Lord?"
"No/No!" Xander and Dracula said at the same time, Xander with more vehemence than Dracula himself.
"Worry not Mattia," Dracula assured, "What Xander needs is a teacher, your function is as a bodyguard, you are not… being replaced.
"Yeah, besides no one could replace you Tia," Xander assured her.
The silver-haired girl nodded meekly, "Okay, if Lord and Master say so."
Vlad nodded, "We do, You are his sword… no his spear, and shield… yes a spear," Vlad said to himself as if lost in thought. "While this next person shall be a tome of knowledge," Turning to his guest, he said, "Alexander could you give me a couple of weeks to get your second Szlachta together," He gave a dark laugh at that, then continued, "I ask that you not experiment with your abilities till then."
"Sure no problem. I've got a lot to think about so if you'll excuse me," Xander said as he got up, with Mattia following in his wake.
As he walked away, Konomi Suzue stared at the blood in her goblet for a moment before draining it in one long gulp. She didn't know what a Turok-Han was, but if it was enough to scare an experienced supernaturalist like Harris-san, Suzue knew she didn't want to turn into one… ever.
'I wonder if he'd be open to spending some time with me later?' She thought as she watched him leave the hall. 'He seems to know more about what's going on than I do and I could use some cold hard facts,' She glanced sidelong at Dracula, 'Facts that aren't quite so biased and coming from someone I'm bound to obey. Stupid blood bond,' She thought to herself.
As if reading her thoughts, which she realized in hindsight he might just be able to do, Dracula commented, "Is being here with me so unpleasant my dear Draculina?"
"I don't like the thought of forced subservience, I'm a cop. I can't just knowingly let you vampires run around and do as you please! Not now that I know what's going on."
Dracula hummed in amusement, before he patted her head like he did for Mattia earlier, "You will soon find my dear, that the world is much, much darker than you previously thought, and if you wish to enforce your will upon it, you must either have strength yourself, or have the aid, ear, or oath of those who do have strength. In the end, strength is equivalent to status in this world of darkness beyond the rays of the sun. Right now, you are weak, in strength. Thus you have no status, besides that which you claim from being my Childe. So, what will you do my dear? How will you rectify this situation?"
In response, Suzue reached over, grabbed the bronze pitcher filled with vitae and began chugging it down like a japanese salaryman would beer after work.
"Good, good my dear Draculina! The Vitae is one path to strength. Knowledge is another, there are many paths to strength. How do you wish to proceed?" he inquired.
Wiping a trickle of blood from her lips, Suzue said, "You said you needed a couple of weeks to create a homunculi for Harris-san yes?"
Dracula nodded, "Yes, what of it?"
Standing she said, "I'd like to get to know him a little better I think, but… once you're done, if you're willing, I'd like to learn more about these paths of Animalism, Auspex, Vicissitude, and Dominate."
"But of course," Vlad agreed. He called, to her retreating back, "All this and more, even the mysteries of Koldunic Sorceries will be open to you my dear Draculina," As he sipped at his vitae he said, "Just you wait my dear, all shall be made clear soon enough."
(...)
Xander was laying on his bed, hands, clasped behind his head, pondering this new situation he found himself in. 'So I can do magic now. Does that mean I'm like Wills? Do I have to worry about going Darkside? Lord, I hope not. I really don't think either Buff or Wills could stop me from ending the world.'
It honestly hurt him to admit as much but ever since they'd ended The Mayor, a rift had formed between them. They went to college to pursue higher education, and he, being poor, pursued a blue-collar job. It was one he excelled in sure, but the gap that had always been there between them, those who had power and he who had none, had simply widened ever further.
During what he dubbed the 'College years' he was the last to find out about certain things. The Initiative, Dawnies true nature, Glory. He had been effectively cut out of the loop either because he wasn't on campus, or just a sheer lack of trust on the part of the rest of the Scoobies. It hurt, and it widened the gap even further. Then he started dating Anya. it was clear the others were only tolerating her for his sake. The 'gap' widened even more. Moreso when his marriage failed and instead of drinking with friends, he ended up drinking alone. But the straw that broke the camel's back was 'his part' in the battle with the First Evil. Was he allowed to stand with his friends in the biggest most important fight in their lives? No, he was asked by Buffy to get Dawn out of town. Something he failed at. It was compounded by the loss of Anya. He didn't know how he knew, he just knew she was gone. That she hadn't survived the final fight… and that no one would mourn her but him.
At that point the gap had become the maw of a chasm. One he didn't feel he could ever cross. He'd had enough by that point. Done being the Zeppo, being the normal one in a group of badasses, and finished with being the janitor who cleaned up messes. So once the dust cleared. He left for Africa.
'The only person I'd trust to stop me should I go too far is already gone,' Xander thought to himself, as he raised a hand above his head before he clenched it into a fist.
"Master?" Tia called, getting his attention. "Is everything alright? You seem… morose?"
Turning his head to look at her, he said, "Tia, if I gave you an order, you'd follow it right?"
"Yes Master," She replied with a firm nod, "What is your will?"
Before Xander could speak there was a polite knock at the door. Mattia was on her feet in moments. One hand on the door handle, and the other palming a knife, she calmly called, "Yes? Who is it?"
"Umm, it's me, ah, Konomi Suzue? I was hoping I could ask Harris-san some questions?" The fiery redhead asked.
Tia looked back at him for confirmation and he nodded, calling, "Only if you call me Xander, Harris is my father, and we don't exactly get along,"
Tia opened the door and the red-head came in her cleavage jiggling with every step she took while wearing a bra!
'Don't stare, don't stare at it Xander, you're a gentleman,' He told himself as he kept his eye firmly locked on her admittedly pretty, heart-shaped face.
"Xander-san?" She said testing out his preferred nomenclature. "Thank you for seeing me," She said bowing at the waist, causing more amazing physics to take place.
"No problem, would you like to take a seat?" He offered her a chair by his desk mainly so her bunker busters would stop bouncing around and distracting him.
"Thank you," She sat down crossing her legs and then let out a long, stress-filled sigh before she all but pleaded, "Xander-san, I-I need your help please!"
"With what exactly, Konomi-san?" Xander asked, sitting up on the edge of his bed while Tia took a spot standing by his side.
"All… all this!" She waved a hand around her for emphasis, "The supernatural, the vampires, magic, all of it! How do I… How did you cope with it? How do I even begin to?"
"First, you pinch yourself," Xander told her seriously.
Suzue blinked "What?"
Instead of answering he reached over and pinched her arm, hard enough for her to let out a yelp of pain. Then he continued, "See? Now you know you aren't dreaming. This is all in fact real Konomi-san. The vampires, magic, all of it is your new reality."
The cop took a couple of breaths, "Okay, okay. This is really real. I'm a vampire you're… a mage?"
"I guess?" He replied with a shrug, "I'm still coming to grips with that bit of info myself. I've been hunting… blood demons since I was seventeen. They're demons who possess corpses who act like vampires but… aren't I guess."
Konomi covered her mouth in shock, "So young? But you look to be around the same age as me, meaning you would've been doing this for about seven to eight years now?"
"Twenty-four, so seven years now" He confirmed. "I'd ask your age, but I know that's rude."
"Twenty-five," She replied, it was only fair after all. She added, "You can call me Suzue by the way, it's not fair if I can call you by your first name and you keep going by my last name."
Xander rubbed the back of his head. He knew enough that to call someone in japan by their first name meant a certain closeness in their relationship, and they'd just met. "Are you sure? You're a cop aren't you?"
She waved him off, "I don't really see myself being a cop in this condition, so it's fine,"
Clearing his throat, he tried to be more transparent, "Correct me if I'm wrong, but isn't using someone's first name in your country a form of closeness, some might even say affection?" Seeing her blush he continued, "Wouldn't it be untoward of me to call you by your first name considering we just met?"
"Xander-" She paused and shook her head, "Alexander-san, you are really are too kind," She got up and put her hands in his shoulders, "If we were in Japan, then yes, it would be a form of intimacy… but we aren't in Japan right now, are we?"
Xander shook his head nervously, "Um no?"
Suzue, despite herself, found herself leaning in, enthralled by the scent Xander was giving off. It was a powerful scent of iron, heat, and ozone. Pressing her forehead against his she looked at him over her spectacles murmuring, "If you're so worried we don't know each other well enough to be on a first name basis, we could get to know each other better Alexander-san. Tell me, do you have a wife, or a lover?"
"No…" Xander replied. "Not anymore,"
Suzue was abruptly pulled back by the scruff of her shirt and placed in a chair by Tia.
"Tia?" Xander questioned.
"My apologies Master, but I was concerned Miss Konomi was about to feed on you," Mattia replied.
"I'm full at the moment," She sulked.
"Oh… so you were about to engage in sex? Unusual, such actions are not usually undertaken by Cainites," Tia noted, "Well, in that case, I apologize for interrupting. Please proceed,"
Crossing her arms, and pouting, Konomi sulked, "Nevermind now, you've ruined the mood."
Clearing his throat a little awkwardly Xander asked, "So um, not that I'm complaining like, at all, but why did you just try to seduce me?"
Knowing he wasn't mad lessened the sting somewhat. Still she told him, "Xander-san, I'm Japanese, twenty-five, already died once, and I am unmarried. Why do you think?" The former police woman rebutted.
He quickly put the pieces together, "Ah, the old Christmas Cake stigma," He noted. In fact, he'd been thinking a lot clearer ever since his awakening, he noted, like a fog in his head had been lifted.
"Yes," She admitted looking down ashamed, "I didn't come here to seduce you!" She backpedaled, "I came here wanting you to explain what you can about the supernatural to me, but you were so nice, and you smelled so good," She paused, placing a finger on her cheek in thought, "But thinking on it, who else do I even have a shot with? Most people don't know about the supernatural, those that do would probably try to kill me right?"
"Yep," Xander didn't want to admit until two years ago, before Anya, he would've been one of those very people.
"So I mean realistically, you're my only choice," She looked at him with her face hopeful as she asked, "You said you didn't have a wife or a lover right?"
"Master has me," Tia butted in, her tone flat as she looked at the Draculina, "It is my duty to see to Master's needs… all of Master's needs."
Xander buried his face in his hands, "Tia, not now. Please stop," he pleaded, begging slightly muffled through his palms.
"Why?" Mattia asked as she looped her arms around one of his, "Tia takes her duties very seriously, Master."
Instead of being scandalized, Suzue just giggled, "She's like a little kid, trying to act all mature."
The homunculi's cheeks puffed out in indignation, "Mattia is not a child!" She held up her boobs for emphasis, "She has breasts! Big ones! That Master likes very much!"
Xander leaned back upon hearing that, "Just what the hell did I do to you when I was out of it?" he asked, perturbed and feeling dirty on an emotional level. Like he violated something innocent while high as a kite!
"What didn't we do?" Tia replied innocently.
"My soul…" Xander moaned, "My soul is tainted beyond redemption!"
At this point Suzue was laughing so hard, she was holding her stomach tears of laughter falling onto her glasses. "You two are great! You should take your boke-tsukkomi routine on the road."
"No… just stop, don't encourage her," Xander said, his tone sad.
Tia cocked her head to the side, "I don't understand, why is Master upset?"
While cleaning her glasses off, Suzue replied, "Because, he feels like he raped or took advantage of you, most likely."
The homunculi nodded in understanding, "I do believe it was once said that one can't rape the willing, no?"
"Ahh, Tia-chan, you're a peach."
Yet the girl just shook her head, "No, I'm a Szlachta, a peach is an edible fruit."
Suzue chuckled again, "Well, how about this then? I propose a trade. You and Xander-san help me learn more about the supernatural, and in return, I help you with your duties Tia-chan? After all, it's easier to get things done when you have help isn't it?"
The girl slowly nodded, "This is true, it would be more efficient and effective to have an extra pair of hands. Especially since my duties consist of guarding the master and keeping him safe. Your help, once you begin honing your abilities, shall become invaluable," She nodded again, this time more brusquely, "I accept, we shall teach what we can, which will translate into making you a more effective bodyguard for Master."
"Umm, do I get a say in this?" Xander asked.
"The Lord has often mentioned that the Master puts himself in dangerous situations. So no, you do not get a say on how I decide to go about pursuing your safety," Mattia replied.
Xander blinked, this was the first time he'd ever seen mattia be so forward. He didn't dislike that she was standing up to him though. Quite the opposite, it showed she had some backbone. He just wished it wasn't about this of all things. "Well, okay then."
Smirking at him, Suzue asked, "Are you really losing at all here?"
Blowing air out of his mouth in a sort of sigh he replied, "No, I suppose not. But you know you can't stop me from doing dangerous stuff right? I have no intention to stop fighting, not after seven years of this."
"Master, I am not an idiot," Mattia replied promptly, "I intend to do what I deem necessary to keep you alive. I never said anything about stopping you from fighting at all. Violence towards demons is hardwired into your DNA at this point," The Szlachta shook her head, "No making you stop fighting would be the same as forcing you to quit breathing, which goes against my purpose of keeping you alive."
"So basically, you're going to fight with me, rather than wrap me in bubble wrap and put me in a padded room?" Xander questioned.
"Correct," Tia replied, "The bubble wrap and padded room is plan E. Should plans B through D fail."
Xander blinked owlishly. "What dare I ask are plans B to D?"
"Plan A is to fight beside you. Plan B should that fail and you become too injured is to have the Lord Embrace you, though I know of your dislike for Canites so I'd rather not have to do that,"
"Yes," Xander agreed, "Continue,"
"Plan C is Conception. I would simply get you so addicted to sex you wouldn't want to leave the bedroom to fight, and an addendum to that was I can get pregnant if need be to force you from the battlefield to help me take care of our child,"
"Wow… child entrapment, the oldest trick in the book, clever," Xander drawled, "Plan D?"
"Destruction. I would eliminate everyone and everything you have an attachment to taking away your will and reason to fight in the first place."
"Don't even think about doing that one Tia!" Xander warned her. "Or I might just kill you."
"To be killed by the master… I don't think I would mind an end like that," She mused. "At least then, I would know he would be strong enough to keep himself safe should he be capable of killing me himself."
It was then that Xander realized behind her demure and helpful nature was a sort of fervent madness. That Mattia would do anything and by anything he meant anything she deemed necessary to keep him 'safe'. 'Is this the true face of Clan Tzimisce, behind the mask of aristocracy and civility is a sort of madness?' he wondered. He realized that he would have to treat Tia carefully from here on out.
"Then there is plan E for Encapsulation. Should all else fail, the master will be kept somewhere safe, where nothing can hurt him," She said this all happily as if she were talking about what was best for him, because in her mind, these were her best options.
"Right, so let's go with option A as best as we can shall we?" Xander said, his voice tight with concern.
"Agreed, I would very much like to assist the Master in achieving his dreams, planning as well as executing his crusades," The Szlachta confirmed. In fact, now that we've spoken properly, I see that in terms of viability, Plans A, and C are most capable of being likely to work, while plans B,E, and D being too extreme to have the desired effect, and would likely have the opposite reaction."
Xander sighed in relief, "Yes that's right," He was glad she understood.
"That said, should any of the Scoobies become a threat Master, I will not hesitate to kill them. To me, your survival is more important than their lives."
'And we're back to square one,' He thought, 'But she's really just putting me before the others. No one but Anya really did that,' Running a hand down his face, Xander said, "Please don't do that unless you absolutely have to Mattia."
The homunculi just smiled and replied, "Of course Master."
(...)
In the weeks that followed Xander and Kozue had built up a rapport. He would tell her stories about his time on the hellmouth, how he slew many a blood demon, and he would make her feel more at ease drinking vitae by drinking a very watered down glass of wine with his meals. In the interim where Draq wasn't sequestering himself away in his lab, Xander was teaching him how to ride a motorcycle. The old Tzimisce found it fascinating how the vehicles worked. He complained about the enclosed and rugged space of a vehicle that was insulting to him in how his coffin was more comforting. Xander struggled to not laugh at how Dracula of all people ranted about the car and how it was unsightly and almost unusable in his homeland near the mountains.
Time passed languidly. He didn't know how to feel about Suzue's none too subtle flirtations. How she just so happens to bend over in front of him showing off her ass, stretch pulling her shirt up showing off her toned stomach, or lean forward just so allowing him to see down her shirt. If she wasn't already a Cainite she'd be a completely different kind of thirsty.
'She's going to be the death of me if she keeps this up,' Xander thought after the former police women left for her nightly lessons in vampiric disciplines from her sire.
"M-Master?" Tia asked as she writhed beneath him as she often did at night, short of breath as she sighed trying to fulfill her favorite duty of all.
Yes?" Xander replied as he laid a tender trail of kisses on her neck.
"Do you…hmm… Dislike Lady Suzue?" Mattia asked before she briefly claimed his lips.
Pulling away, Xander replied, "Not at all, it's just… She's coming off as a tease. I'm not sure if she's waiting for me to make a move or?"
Letting out a breathy laugh, the Szlachta replied, "She wants you… to want her master. To claim her. She is new at this. All of this, not just the supernatural… ah… but romance tooo!" She said her voice raised in pitch as her master emptied himself in her, his vitae sending a rush of energy though her. Taking a moment to catch her breath, she finished, "She is likely waiting for you to take the lead, that doesn't seem to be a problem for you," She joked, as she flexed her stomach muscles, giving him a final squeeze as he pulled out of her.
Rolling off of her and onto the bed, Xander sighed, "It's complicated, I'm still trying to reconcile the fact that Vampires and Blood Demons are different. So, though I don't dislike her at all, I…"
"Need to get past some biases," Tia finished for him. "Demons otherwise known as the Fallen are very different from Cainites Master," She spoke softly as she laid on her side, her head on his chest. "Demons are fallen angels who escape from the Abyss possessing humans. Weaker fallen posses corpses. That is what you've fought throughout your career as a pseudo-Hunter,"
"Pseudo-Hunter?" Xander asked.
"A recently noted phenomenon. Humans have recently been getting visions and with it, powers to hunt the supernatural. You were never given powers, but that never stopped you from hunting demons," Tia told him.
"Interesting," Xander murmured. "Wonder why I didn't get lucky?"
"This may be selfish of me, but I'm glad you weren't. Had you been, I highly doubt you would've befriended Lord Dracula. Meaning, I would not exist and we wouldn't be here like this."
Xander nodded tiredly, "True," his eyelids felt like lead, and they were closing fast. "I'm glad I met you and Suzue, Tia," He got out before he nodded off.
The Szlatcha was silent for a time, unmoving until she was sure her master was truly asleep. Once she was certain he was in the realm of Morpheus, she leaned up carefully, removed his eyepatch, and kissed him on the cheek. "Me too, Alexander. Pleasant dreams."
(...)
Xander awoke from his slumber wondering what he was going to do today. He felt movement in his bed, but that wasn't unusual. What was is that he felt multiple bodies moving instead of the one. Slightly panicked he jumped out of the bed and turned to see just who was in it with him. There was Mattia who Xander expected, then Suzue who while not surprised, Xander did not expect her to go that far yet, the third woman is who confused Xander. He didn't remember anyone in Dracula's castle who looked like a mix of Egyptian and Indian. Hell, her light purple hair, similar to Mattia's, was darker and looked nice. The fact she was butt naked also put off some alarm bells in Xander's head.
"I am only going to ask one question. Any of you gals feel free to answer. Did I do drugs again last night and have an orgy?"
"No."
"Absolutely not!"
"I wish we did. That would have been valuable data."
Were the immediate responses from all three women. Noticing the third woman in the bed with them, Mattia looked confused and Suzue jumped out of the bed and hid behind Xander squishing her lingerie clad boobs against his back. Suzue then decided to speak up.
"Wait, who the heck are you? Did Dracula sire someone else while we were staying here?"
The new girl's immediate response was to pull a pair of glasses out of somewhere(?) and put them on, "To answer your questions. No, I am not a new sire of Dracula. He has been busy in his workshop making sure I was made up to the standards of teacher for both you Suzue and Alexander here. I am the Szlachta teacher that was promised. My name is Rani VIII. I will be accompanying you as a teacher in all things about the Masquerade, etiquette, magic, and if needed other passions if Mattia cannot fulfill your urges, Lord Alexander. I have been informed that your stamina is above average and could tire out at least a sixth generation vampire. Also before you ask, my predecessors or Rani I through VII are now defunct and were used as materials to help make sure I could assist you."
Xander could only face palm and again wish he could remember what all he did from his drug induced stupor from Africa. When asked, Mattia only answered everything between Kissing and the Kama Sutra.
"So you decided to show up in my bed naked because ….."
"Considering your history with women, whether they be vampire, demon, or other. I thought it would be best to be close to you and develop a sort of skinship with me holding no weapons to harm you."
"That is probably the dumbest and smartest reason I have heard from someone to get past my guard."
"My dear Alexander, as your teacher, I must express to you that madness and insanity are separated from sanity and genius by a fine line. Now we must all get dressed. I believe that the lord of the castle will give us parting gifts and we shall be on our way," Rani then proceeded to get out of the bed, walk past Xander and Suzue and then looked at Xander without a change in her expression, "I will meet you in the dining hall. Please do not take too much time having sexual shenanigans with Lady Suzue and Mattia. I do think it is a bad Idea to keep Lord Dracula waiting."
She then left. Still butt naked as the day she was born which Xander realized could have been yesterday for all he knew!
Mattia chose that moment to get out of the bed and started to get dressed, "Come on Xander it isn't a good idea to keep Lord Dracula waiting. If he is seeing us off then we must make haste. He has allowed a lot of breaking conventions recently but I fear what may happen to us if you are not present or worse. The time of hospitality he offered ends."
Suzue didn't understand what all Mattia was talking about but she took that cue to get dressed herself and walked from behind Xander and bent over showing off her fine peachy ass to him as she picked up her clothes. She felt no one would blame her if she shook it a little to entice. She still wanted a boyfriend damn it!
Xander would be lying if he didn't say that he didn't enjoy the morning show. He still felt a sense of wrongness though that the ladies would be wanting his company as of recently. He wondered if his awakening as a mage may have changed his destiny. Of course he always fought against destiny, prophecy and fate.
He decided to dress himself in proper clothes for the trip. He packed up his dark brown coat, he considered it, along with his stylized eyepatch, signature clothing but along with them he packed warmer clothing. He hadn't told Kozumi yet but they were intending to head back to Japan. She had accounts to settle there, and after that? Well, they'd go wherever the winds took them. Xander had seen Africa, he was interested in seeing the rest of the world. Doing some globe trotting. And if the trails took him back to America at some point well, that's fine.
He had just finished filling an antique but sturdy travel suitcase with any clothing he could get his hands on that fit him and closed it before turning to Tia. She was wearing a white leotard with red trim. It left nothing to the imagination, and practically matched her skin tone so if it wasn't for the red trim, she would've seemed naked. He then noted that she was wearing sabbotons and vambraces on her legs and arms.
"What's with the Leotard and metal? Xander asked.
"Battle uniform," the Szlachta replied succinctly.
"No breastplate?" Xander asked.
Mattia shook her head, "Unnecessary and too cumbersome."
Xander just accepted her answer as is, then asked, "No weapon?"
That caused the szlachta to smirk, "I do have one, but I'll keep it tucked away for now."
Xander liked that smirk, "Fine, you do that," placing his suitcase in front of him, he asked, "You got everything you need?"
In response, Tia revealed a small purse. "Yes master. Everything I need is in here. If you'd like I could add your suitcase as well?"
"Is that purse a Tardis?" Xander asked, looking at it?
"Tardis?"
"Is it bigger on the inside than the outside?" He clarified.
A look of understanding crossed her face. "Ah, yes. When he was alive, Lord Dracula was a practitioner of both the spheres of Prime, Spirit, and Correspondence. Though he cannot use magic now after his transformation into a Cainite, he can still teach it."
"Why didn't he teach me himself then?" Xander asked.
Tia gave a strained smile, "Your specialties might not be the same as his, hence why he built you a proper teacher who can teach you whatever your skill set might pertain to."
"She's something alright. Do I need to worry about multiple naked women joining in bed now? I am down for some roleplay but I think actually doing my teacher is a bit much."
"Don't knock it till you try it?" Tia advised as her purse opened unusually wide, Xander noticed it was lined with teeth, and she dropped his suitcase inside it. Seeing him gazing at the teeth she replied easily to the unasked question, "Ant-theft measure."
Xander just laughed, "Of course it is," as he held open the door for her as they left for the main hall.
(...)
After a traditional full English breakfast, which is the only way Xander would ever consume blood in the form of blood pudding, he stood before Vlad embraced his friend. "Vell vy friend, it is time vor us to part,'' The Tzimisce was so emotional his accent was coming out thick.
"There, there, Draq, you can't go cryin man, you'll ruin your image man," He said, slapping the man on the shoulder.
"Vaa, voo are correct vy friend, Vi apologize," He said, wiping the tears of blood out of his eyes. Taking a moment to collect himself, Vlad said, "I have one final gift for you Alexander, but in order to give it to you, I must know, are you willing to trust me completely?" Vlad looked down into his friend's eye as he said this.
Looking up ever so slightly, he replied, "Yes, and honestly, I never thought I'd say that. So go on Vlad, lay it on me."
Vlad laid a hand on his brow saying, "Relax and don't fight the change," The Lord of Wallachai replied as he used the Tzimicse art of Vissitude on his friend. Bones were thickened, muscle fibers were streamlined, mental processes were enhanced to the peak, everything about the human form was perfected down to the cellular level. It took moments to a vampire who had been practicing the art for five centuries.
"Vlad, what did you just do?" Xander felt… different. Good mind you, really good, but different nonetheless.
"I made you a real life version of the Captain America you mentioned in passing. Your body is the perfection of the human form. Musclestructre, bones, mental processes, memory, Even your aging has if not slowed down significantly outright halted."
"Dude…" Xander said, "You just super soldier forumal'd me?"
The Lord of Wallachia shrugged, "More or less, I've been testing the process on my Axes first, my personal guard. Once I perfected the process, it was my final gift for you my friend." He then turned to his Childe, "Kozue, you are a remarkably quick study. Most Childer spend a century under their parents yet you learned the basics in a little over a month. I am most impressed with your drive to learn. Now, you must go out and learn and grow for yourself."
Kozue bowed, "Thank you sir!" The police girl didn't say the reason she tried so hard was because she didn't want Xander to leave her behind when he left. So she crammed like she was studying for the police entrance exam again just to make sure she could go with him when he decided to leave.
The Cainite then addressed his unofficial Childr, "Mattia, Ranni your true tasks begin now. Bring honor to your House."
Both girls bowed, "Yes Viovode!"
Vlade Tepes III Vivode of Wallachia watched from his tower window as his companions left via carriage, having occluded the sun with storm clouds with koldunic sorcery. As a cold rain began to fall against the glass, he turned away, saying to one of his guards. "I will be in my study! I do not wish to be disturbed!"
(...)
Dracula had spent the last several hours staring into the fireplace of his study, sullenly sipping on a tumbler of vitae as he stared into the crackling flames. "It's quiet around here… too quiet," He muttered. "I never noticed till those children left," He stood, and downed his tumbler, tossing the glass aside, "Bah! Look at yourself Vlad, you're getting… sentimental in your old age!" He berated himself. "You knew they couldn't stay forever, no matter how much you would've wanted it, so there is no point in whining about spilled vitae."
Hearing the doors to his study open, he whirled and snarled, "I asked not to be disturbed!"
He expected to see a ghoul servant or at worst, one of his Axes. Well, he did see an Axe, it was just in the hands of a very familiar short brunette. She smirked at him and asked, "Sorry, is now a bad time?"
"Elizabeth," He said flatly, paying no attention to the two women flanking her on either side, "You've come for Alexander," He stated more than asked.
"Got it in one," The Slayer affirmed. "Where is he? Hand him over Vlad and I won't kill you, promise."
Tzimisce laughed, "You? Kill me? Surely you jest my dear?" He slowly advanced, "You couldn't harm me when we first met. What makes you think you stand a chance now? Because you have a magic axe?" He let out a haughty laugh, "Amusing, but woefully incorrect my dearest Elizabeth."
To her credit, the so-called 'Queen of Slayers' didn't show a hint of fear. Instead she jutted her chin out defiantly, and demanded, "Where is Xander?"
"You're too little too late I'm afraid," Vlad sighed in depression, "He is already gone."
"What did you do to him?!" Buffy demanded seeing red as black tinged the edges of her vision, her grip on the Slayer Scythe's haft increasing in proportion to her rage.
Vlad looked at her curiously, "Do to him?" He shook his head, "Nothing, he just left several hours ago."
"He left?" Buffy echoed, "You just let him leave?"
The vampire nodded and shrugged his shoulders, "Indeed, he had things to do."
Narrowing her eyes The prime slayer questioned, "So you didn't kidnap him to make him your Renfield again?"
Sighing, he rebutted, "My dear, you could've located him much sooner than this via locator spell. Your red-headed friend is an accomplished witch is she not?" Seeing her nod he continued, "Do you know where Alexander was before showing up at my estate?" taking the silence as a prompt to continue he said, "Africa,"
"What was Xander doing in Africa?" She asked.
The voivode shrugged, "I don't know, you're his friend, shouldn't you know? Anyway one day several months ago, he turned up at my estate, stoned out of his mind. I looked after him until several weeks ago when he finally came to his senses when he admitted he went on a vision quest."
"Vision quest? Africa? None of this is making any sense!" Buffy raved. "How do I know you aren't just lying and haven't turned him into a juicebox?"
Dracula drew himself up to his full height, his visage twisting into something inhuman and terrible as he did so. His forehead twisted and spiraled out at the sides, shifting into a set of horns like a bull, his fingers lengthed into claws, and a multitude of maws opened up on his now bare chest as his eyes became black as onyx. A set of three chiropteran wings flared out from his back that instead of having webbing in between them had feathers spontaneously growing from the bones. Even as his face compacted and became gaunt like a very pissed off pitbull.
"I… thought you were a vampire."
"You ignorant child! I am a real fucking vampire!" he roared at her acidic spittle flying from his fang covered maw. "A descendant of Caine! What you have spent so long slaying is but a shadow of both True Canites and True Demons! Best you pray you never run into either! Now get ye gone from my castle kine before I, how did you put it? Ah yes, turn you into a juicebox."
The Slayer decided that discretion was the better part of valor, and beat a hasty retreat. Not satisfied by sending her running, Vlad mentally commanded his Szlachta to harry them till morning. To chase them off of his lands.
It was only once the echoes of her footfalls had faded that the Voivode allowed himself to resume humanoid form. He then collapsed into his chair, and poured himself another tumbler of vitae. Downing it like a shot, he said to himself, "I think I need a vacation,"
(...)
Word Count: 11,039 Number of Pages: 25 Date Completed: 2/23/2023
(...)
AN: Hello my people! Hello and welcome to the spiritual successor to The Laughing Scooby! This iteration has BtVS deep in the World of Darkness. Xander is still a mage just like in Laughing Scooby. But he's not a Constaine but there's an entire school of magic (Entropy) that does what John Constanine does anyway so… meh? Will the Oh My Goddess Crew be showing up… continue reading to find out! Expect vampires, werewolves, mages, Demons, Fae, Mummies, and all manner of things in this fic. That said, I hope you all enjoyed it, and here is Snowy and First Hassan.
Snowy: The world of darkness is full of horrors. Xander has a way of bringing some light to this cold dark world. Who knows what he will bring but let's all agree this is for the best. Buffy is finding out her world is that much darker. The question is what will she and Willow get into without their trusty Zeppo there to keep everything together. Come along my fellow fans of Xander we got a wild ride ahead of us!
First Hassan: If there is light, there is darkness and if there's darkness, there's light, a light can be shined upon the very abyss itself. Repelling against the forces of evil that lurks among those crawls upon the darkness itself, Xander will be the light, a shining bright beacon that'll inspire to give what people have long forgotten, hope. A little forbid I just did but it's something Xander will be in the future as there is no one but the great Xander himself who can turn the odds, no matter what shit is aimed at him. Come on guys, listen to what Snowy said, we are about to have a wild ride with our protagonist ahead of us! If you want to help our beloved author to continue his dream of writing, be sure to head onto P-A-T and R-E-O-N. You can have early access to his story where it hasn't been edited by yours truly. Thank you guys and I'll see you all later!(Turning around while blue flames surrounds Hassan before disappearing)