1
A slender man's hand writes on a chalkboard, in teacherly cursive.
Ianto Harkness-Jones, a stunningly fit Welshman in his twenties, finishes writing out, "SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST"
Ianto glances at the classroom of high school students. He is a demure man, somewhat awkward in his speaking, but he has the rapt attention of all the kids in the class.
"When Darwin said 'fittest,' he didn't necessarily mean the strongest or the most intelligent, or any one trait - he merely meant those organisms most well—suited to their environment."
The girls in the class look him up and down as he speaks. A pretty student, notices a girl beside him drawing Ianto, only without his clothes. He hits her and they chuckle.
"We humans think we're more fit, more evolved, because we're smarter. But we're neophytes. We've been around two million years, give or take. The cockroach has been here for 350 million. You tell me who's the more successful species." Ianto ignores those who are bored, it is near the end of the day after all.
A boy raises his hand.
"Will."
"How's all this go with how the Bible says there ain't no dinosaurs?" Will asked.
Some of the kids laugh at the boy. Ianto pauses, about to answer, when the bell rings.
"We'll tackle that tomorrow... Everyone bring your boxing gloves." Ianto laughs as he waves the off.
The kids start to leave.
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Celebratory banners are strung over the street, including one that reads: "DEER SEASON STARTS TODAY!" We're in the center of Torchwood, South Wales, a moderately depressed small town. Today's a big day, as hunters from far and near crowd the streets in their massive pickups.
Men spill in and out of a gun store buying loads of ammunition. Old hunters with faces like prunes stand outside Alien's Tavern getting drunk. A man with few teeth has a dead deer strung out across the back of his truck, skinning the carcass, its innards spilling loose.
Owen Harper, a man in an overly tense mood, is driving through town in his big old Cadillac. He comes upon a hunter's truck, double-parked, jamming up traffic. Jack jams on his horn.
"Get the fuck out of the way, cocksucker!" he roars.
Owen turns to see a mother and her two children on the sidewalk, listening and staring in shock.
"Mornin', Mayor." She says dryly.
Owen smiles, a bit embarrassed. He notices a group of hunters on the sidewalk, looking and pointing at something up in the sky.
He looks up to see a small meteor plummeting toward earth.
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Students file out of the open door for the day.
Kylie, Ianto's pretty student, is among them. She and her friend are looking up at the falling meteor. She points out with a sniff "Prolly go find it later, sell it on eBay."
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A rancher with ahorse on a tether turns his head to see the meteor, much closer to him. It's rushing down toward the treetops of a nearby forest.
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A framed wedding photograph of a very young Ianto and a handsome Captain is sitting on a desk. The photo trembles lightly, with the impact of the meteor hitting the earth. Another similarly framed print is of him with a striking buxom woman, his wife Rhiannon. Sister to Ianto.
Johnny Davies a man in his mid-thirties, notices the photos on his desk moving. He looks up from his desk and out his door, where there's a glass workshop. Two workers are carrying a large pane of glass, looking relieved they didn't drop it.
"Just a tremor, boys." Jack grins, then goes back to filling out the tags of file folders with a Sharpie.
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Four cops – Jack Harkness-Jones the town's young, relaxed, and
handsome Chief of Police, Archie, an older, toad-like cop, Andy, a younger, somewhat goofy cop, and Gwen, a determined cop - are standing stock-still in the station parking lot.
They chuckle.
"Did ya' feel that?!" Andy squeaks as they enter the station.
The four cops start to remove their holsters and so forth, finished for the day.
"I always get afraid when that happens, 'cause what if the ground cracks open and you fall inside? It's so hot in there you get all burnt to nothing' like that …" Andy snaps his fingers "Happened to my uncle Barry."
Archie and Jack laugh at him. Archie asks, "Who told you that story, Andy?"
"My aunt."
"Your uncle Barry left her for a stripper up in Leeds."
Andy looks shocked, sad.
Eugene, a slightly dim dispatcher, on his headset at the police operator's unit, swirls toward them, alarmed. "Chief! We got a 'mergency over at
the diner!"
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The four cops move into the Diner. There's a Commotion. Most of the patrons are standing.
"Back there, Jack!" The Waitress nods back through the service window, into
the kitchen, where a large Doe is hopping around. A Dishwasher stands on the counter, Yelping with fear.
Jack, Archie, Andy, Gwen, and the Waitress enter.
The doe skips around.
"She slipped in, was eating trash. We seen it on TV, how they kill ya'…"
"Right." Jack looks at her sideways.
"So, we thought we best call in" she ends.
Jack spots the open rear door and tries to herd the deer toward it. "Come on now, honey, door's this way."
"It's open season. Let's shoot her." Gwen suggests helpfully.
"She's just scared, Gwen." Jack replies, his arms out like he might fly over the poor thing.
"Also, Jack likes to take a female through the back door any chance he gets." Arche quips.
Archie and Gwen laugh.
Andy snatches a dishtowel and rushes the doe, using it like a cape. The scared doe leaps away from him, jumping onto the kitchen counter.
"She isn't a bull, Andy!" Jack yells.
The animal kicks off a pot, which hits Gwen.
'Goddamn bambi-rat!" Gwen yells.
As the doe jumps to the floor, she gets her hoof wrapped in a telephone cord.
The cord is plugged into the wall, trapping the doe in place. Archie, Gwen, and Andy attempt to dive for the cord, but can't avoid the doe's crazy, flying hooves.
"Get back." Jack demands.
The other cops step away. Jack steps slowly toward the doe, speaking calmly. "It's okay, sweetheart. Nobody's gonna hurt you."
The doe looks at him, settling a bit. His voice seems to be soothing her. Jack gets closer. "That's right. Just gonna pull this cord out. It's gonna be all right."
The cops and restaurant folk look on in awe as the doe, breathing heavily, becomes still. Jack scoops close past her and yanks the telephone cord out of the wall.
Jack smiles. Then the doe runs forward, almost knocking Jack over, and streaks out the back door.
Jack, Archie, Gwen, and Andy move up to the doorway and watch the deer skitter off into the woods beyond, dragging the telephone, tied to her leg.
"Hell, she took a phone. Now the forest critters are gonna be calling us all hours of the night." Jack huffs.
Everyone laughs. Archie pretends to be on the phone.
"Chief of police there? This a squirrel. Bring me ya nuts, motherfucker!"
Everyone laughs some more.