Clarke was surprised to find Raven at the table with Roan and Murphy. She looked awful, but she was present, picking at a plate of food. She looked at Clarke after Murphy and Roan rose to bow to her.
Clarke waved them off, her eyes on Raven, considering. "Get your shit together. We're leaving in the morning."
Raven nodded.
Clarke turned to Roan. "I want to borrow Kemp and a unit."
"They are yours."
Clarke nodded and went to the door, brushing against Lexa on the way. She felt the chip working, filaments burrowing in and settling more firmly. Clarke sent a guard to bring Kemp, and pulled Lexa back to the table. Murphy brought a chair for her and moved his so Heda and her Fleimkepa could sit side by side.
Clarke thanked him before starting her recruitment spiel. "I want you to come with us," she began.
Murphy cut her off. "You know I will."
"And I know you want to go home."
"Eventually."
Clarke looked at him, hating that he felt like he should lie to her. "When we get back."
"I'll hold you to it."
Kemp entered then, and automatically bowed. He was used to Roan's court, but this one room contained more important people than were in all of Azgeda. Murphy got up and gestured for Kemp to take his seat. He found another chair and made Raven share that side of the table.
"Klark is Heda now," Roan began. "Azgeda has sworn fealty. She desires you to accompany her to bring Lander back to Polis."
"Of course." He looked at Clarke. "How many men?"
"Not many. Speed is important, and there are only three of them."
Kemp nodded, and Clarke could tell he was sorting through warriors in his head, picking those he wanted to bring.
"We leave in the morning. Meet me at the stables at dawn."
"Sha, Heda," Kemp answered. He stood and bowed to Clarke before leaving to prepare.
"It's gonna be a long trip," Clarke muttered.
Raven snorted. If it was up to Kemp and the warriors accompanying them, they would do everything but wipe Clarke's ass, and someone would step up to do that if she asked. She emptied her plate and looked around the table, her eyes ending on Clarke. "Don't you dare leave without me."
"Wouldn't dream of it. Get a bath and pack what you need. I'll see you in the morning." Clarke left, but Lexa stayed.
"How is she?" Roan asked, ignoring the Skaikru.
"Angry."
"It will pass."
Lexa shrugged. She couldn't do anything about how Clarke felt.
"I will stay as long as you need me."
"You should leave when you can ride. Azgeda needs you."
"And Klark needs you, but you are sitting here with us."
"Klark does not want to talk to me right now."
"That didn't stop you before," Roan reminded her, "and got me a new scar."
"This is different."
"It is not different, Leksa."
She didn't argue with him. He wouldn't understand. She didn't understand completely. But Klark was always Lexa's exception. Klark was always allowed liberties no one else was permitted, even when Lexa didn't realize why. She thought she was courting a powerful new ally and she was, but she was falling for Clarke at the same time. And then the Mountain happened and everything between them was shattered by duty. When they somehow got through the minefields surrounding their positions and made their way back to being Lexa and Clarke, Titus murdered her.
Now, they were in the middle of another mess, bigger than the one Skaikru made, and may as well been trying to communicate across a flooded river. Clarke leaving wouldn't help. Whatever, whoever Clarke would be when she returned worried Lexa.
100 – 100 – 100
Raven did what Clarke asked, She took a long bath, realizing only after she got in that she had no idea where her clothes were, and yelled for Murphy.
"What," he asked from the doorway.
"I don't know where any of my stuff is."
"I'll find it."
He wasn't gone long, and returned with clothes. Murphy averted his eyes when he left them for Raven. "Your stuff is across the hall from Heda's suite," he told her on his way out.
"Thanks."
Her immediate problem solved, Raven laid back, enjoying the warm water, and began crying again. She loved Finn Collins, but not like she loved Ontari, and she soon left him in her past. It was going to be a long time before Raven could think of anything but Ontari.
She forced herself to stop. Crying solved nothing. She was riding out with Clarke in the morning, and started planning what would go in her pack.
100 – 100 – 100
Clarke had too much energy and was too angry to accomplish anything productive. From the training ring, she saw the fire at the top of the tower. It would be extinguished while she was gone. Clarke hoped it wouldn't take long to track Lander down. Someone in his lands, someone in Blue Cliff and Shadow Valley would know their bolt holes.
Alba bowed to her. "Heda."
"Ticha."
"How can I help?"
"I need to practice."
Alba picked up Clarke's favorite training sword and tossed it to her. He picked up his own and met Clarke in the center of the ring. Clarke was better now by orders of magnitude than when she was when Roan sent her for her first training session, but Alba had decades of experience to draw on.
As they went around and around the ring, a crowd gathered to watch. There were no missteps on either part, just an ongoing dance of feints and blocks, and Clarke finally settled down now that she had something to concentrate on.
At the end of two hours, they took a water break. That was when Clarke noticed the crowd.
"How long have they been there?"
Alba shrugged. Clarke was a dangerous foe now, and all of his concentration was on keeping her moving and her sword away from his body. "Word gets around. Lexa always drew a crowd."
"Lexa was a showoff."
"Sometimes."
Clarke drank again, filled the dipper, and poured it over her head to cool down. It was mostly a delaying tactic. She hadn't thought about being in the streets. The people always gathered around Heda.
She thanked Alba and put the training sword in the rack before going to greet her people and assure them she would bring them justice for Ontari's death.
100 – 100 – 100
Raven arrived at the stable well before dawn. She tacked her horse and waited.
Murphy was next to arrive. He took care of his horse, then Clarke's. Kemp and his troops arrived next. Murphy was intrigued to see that they weren't just Azgeda, and decided that Kemp picked the troops he knew best or had seen fighting well.
Clarke was last to arrive. She had too many last minute duties: to instruct Marcus and Miller, speak with the Natblida, get maps from the scouts. She left Marcus to tell her mother what was happening, and he looked resigned when Clarke asked him to do that.
"I know she's gonna be mad. I'm sorry you'll have to deal with that. I promise to find some time to talk to her when I get back.
"She'll hold you to that."
Clarke nodded. "This isn't what I wanted."
"I know." Marcus hesitated and put a hand on Clarke's shoulder. "And I know you'll do your best. Don't be afraid to ask for help, Clarke."
She nodded again. "Deal with the ambassadors for me, OK? Roan can give you advice if you need it."
Marcus glanced at the sky. The sky was nearly all blue. "You should go. May we meet again."
"May we meet again," Clarke answered, and started the walk to the stable.
Her guards didn't need to keep anyone away from Clarke. The few people on the streets were starting their days.
Lexa waited at the stable, too. Clarke sent her guards to prepare and they stood looking at each other. "Please be careful."
"Take care of everyone." Clarke stood still, battling the feelings inside her. She wanted to hate Lexa again, but couldn't. That didn't mean she wasn't still volcanically angry at the situation.
"Heda," Lexa began.
"Don't." Clarke stepped closer. "If you came to say goodbye, say it."
"No."
Clarke waited, and Lexa gave in. She took the few steps into Clarke's space and kissed her. Neither saw everyone around them put their backs to them while Lexa told Clarke everything she wanted to say. When it finished, they stayed forehead to forehead. "I love you," Lexa said softly.
"Ai hod yu in," Clarke answered. After a second, she added, "we'll be back soon."
"Sha," Lexa agreed, whispering, but couldn't let go.
Clarke backed away slowly. Lexa kept watching Clarke. Lexa moved out of the way, still watching, and stayed there until the gates of Polis closed behind them as they rode away.
100 – 100 – 100
The only talking during the first hours came from the soldiers behind them. Clarke, Murphy, Raven and Kemp road abreast on the road, setting a pace that the horses could maintain for the day.
Now that she was Heda, Clarke didn't give a damn what Trikru thought. She rode into their lands, the quickest way to Rock Line from Polis. They were deep in the forest when their way was blocked by Trikru warriors. Clarke knew that meant there archers in the trees.
She sat on her horse, giving Trikru time to observe her dress and her company. She saw movement through the Trikru fighters, and Indra finally appeared.
She looked closely at Clarke for a moment and bowed. Clarke got down from her horse and handed the reins to Murphy.
Indra was back on her feet when Clarke reached her. "It is true," she said flatly.
"Sha." She lowered her voice. "No one wanted this, especially me."
"Lexa can elevate you no further," Indra answered bitterly.
Clarke looked at her for a few seconds. Indra still looked at Clarke as she had when they walked Skaikru's killing field. The only way to change her opinion was to do her job.
Acid rose in Clarke's throat as she sidestepped Indra. "Ontari kom Azgeda fell in battle against the traitors of Rock Line, Shadow Valley, and Blue Cliff. I hold the Flame because there is no one else. The oldest Natblida is 12. Would you have a child as heda?"
The gona behind Indra went to one knee as those in the trees came down to join them. That left Indra and Clarke standing on the road between Trikru and Clarke's fighters, all still mounted. Clarke returned her attention to Indra. "You don't have to like me, Indra, but you know what I can do."
Clarke watched her go down slowly, head finally bending. "Mochof," she said loud enough for only Indra to hear, then looked over the Trikru in the road, still on their knees. "Rise. Spread the word that Wanheda is now Heda, and that if those jokas surrender, their deaths will be quick and their krus will not be harmed."
"Sha, Heda," they answered as one, rose and cleared the road. Clarke went back to her horse and wondered how many more times this would happen.
"That was tense," Raven said when they were past the Trikru detachment.
Clarke nodded. No one with her had seen the carnage. It was supposed to be a happy trip. Nia's corpse was in a cart, proof that Azgeda was defeated and would no longer raid Trikru or threaten Skaikru. Lexa's smile was so bright that Clarke thought her heart would burst with happiness. This was what they had worked so hard for. Peace. Lexa had been fighting her whole life, Clarke since before her father was executed, and now they wouldn't have to, and they especially wouldn't have to fight each other any more.
Then it was over, the dream of peace, all their hopes for happily ever after. Three hundred stinking bloated corpses lay in the field under the sun, flies lazily feasting. Indra was there, looking at her with the certainty that Clarke caused this despite the sick, stunned look on her face.
She didn't hear what Raven asked, or Murphy telling her to back off for now. Reins were slack in her hand, but the horse knew to stay on the road. Instead, she heard Lexa, saw in her mind the other woman kneeling before Clarke, holding her hand, promising that she hadn't changed her mind because Skaikru were idiots, that she loved Clarke and knew Clarke loved her even though they might never say those words.
Murphy kept an eye on her and when he thought Clarke had been in her head long enough, leaned over to poke her.
"What?"
"You've been quiet."
"Got lots of new friends in my head."
"Oh, right, I forgot the bonus march of history."
Raven snickered and Kemp looked at Murphy, unsure whether he should do something about how he spoke to Heda.
"Asshole," Clarke said without venom.
"Like opinions, everybody has one."
Raven laughed at that.
Kemp was aghast. They were being rude and disrespectful to Heda. Before he could say anything, Clarke leaned forward and looked at him. "It's a Skaikru thing, Kemp."
"I do not like it."
"We'll save it for when we're alone."
"That is best," he answered with a glance over his shoulder.