Chapter Seven
Harry shifted nervously in the seat which Snape had conjured for him. He'd spent the last 10 minutes refusing to answer any of the deeply penetrative questions that the Professor had asked him, choosing instead to sit with his head in his hands, avoiding eye contact in case of another sudden invasion to his mind.
He didn't know what to do. His brain seemed to be whirring and yet no inspiration came.
Everything was so incredibly overwhelming.
He was thinking about Malfoy's kiss. About Uncle Vernon. About Ron and Hermione. Panic was rising once more within him.
And while all these things went round and round in his head, Professor Snape simply sat at the desk opposite, gazing at him intently with his hands clasped on his desk.
Snape had given up with questions once it was clear he was getting nowhere. He felt a malicious frustration with the boy and his refusal to concede any information, but he was also disturbed by a new feeling which he'd never associated with Potter before: sympathy.
He'd had his fair share of hardships in life; his muggle father had never treated him well, and he'd been routinely abused by the Dark Lord (as had all his followers). He had also struggled with self-loathing for as long as he could remember, knowing he was an unattractive and unlikeable man. He, however, had never resorted to mutilating himself for comfort.
"Mr Potter, I can sit here in silence for an eternity, though I'd rather not" he drawled calmly "Are you going to force me to resort to veritaserum to pull the truth from you?"
Harry's eyes flitted from left to right, as though looking for an escape, then came to a rest on his Professor.
"Perhaps…perhaps that might be the easiest way…" he stammered, cheeks turning pink from embarrassment.
Snape raised his eyebrow "You'd prefer I force you to tell the truth than to simply offer it to me?"
Harry nodded slowly, and waited while Snape went to his storeroom to fetch the liquid.
"2 drops Potter, it's a potent brew" said Snape, returning and offering a small phial to Harry.
Before he could change his mind, Harry carefully extracted 2 droplets and swallowed. His head cleared and he sat gazing straight ahead. Snape sat opposite him and immediately began asking questions:
"How long has your uncle been beating you?" - "Since the start of the Summer holidays"
"When did you begin to cut yourself?" - "The last day of the holidays"
"Why are you cutting yourself?" – "Because I deserve it. Because I'm a freak and a poof"
"Has your uncle hurt you in other ways?" – "He hits me with his belt. He forces himself on me. He hurts me sexually. He rapes me."
Snape paused for a moment, taken aback. He'd not been expecting that answer and had to take a second to regroup and rethink before continuing.
"Do you have anyone who helps you?" – "Draco Malfoy"
"Does anyone at home help you" – "No, I'm not worth it. I'm a dirty freak"
"Will you cut yourself again?" – "Yes"
Snape leaned back in his chair. The effects of the veritaserum would begin to wear off any second now and he knew that Potter would become introspective once again. His mind was running fast: this was an incredibly serious situation, one which must be handled delicately and with care. He must speak to Albus. The boy couldn't possibly return to Surrey next summer.
Meanwhile, Harry's head was unfogging and he felt a sudden jolt of panic and fear upon realising the intimate secrets he had revealed. Without pause or thought, he sprang up from his chair and sprinted out of Snape's rooms.
He ran without knowing where he was going, paying attention to nothing and no one. Only when he was so out of breath that he couldn't possibly go further did he stop and slip into an empty classroom nearby.
Looking frantically around the room, Harry searched for something to cut himself with. He pulled open drawers, threw open desks and store cupboards and even tried to pull up some of the tiles on the floor with hope that they would have jagged edges.
Tears were streaming down his face, but he didn't remember crying. "You're a wizard you idiot" he scolded himself "Accio penknife". Not one minute later, his beloved knife came whooshing into the room.
Without so much as a pause, he rolled up his sleeve and violently tour the knife across his arm. He didn't care anymore. Back and forth the knife went, leaving chaos in it's wake. Bright red blood dripped onto the floor and Harry smiled as he began to lose consciousness. He'd gone so deep. Just as he'd wanted to.
With that final thought, he slumped to the floor.
Severus was unsurprised by Potter's swift departure from his rooms. The boy had essentially spilled his darkest secrets to his least favourite professor. No teenager would have wanted to hang around for long enough to face the repercussions.
He cast a quick tempus spell to check the time, and decided that there was no point in waiting. Tossing a handful of floo powder in his fireplace, he shouted "Albus Dumbledore", and swiftly made his way to the headmaster's office.
Dumbledore was pacing in his office when Severus stepped out of the fire.
"Ah, Severus. Humbug?" He proffered a bowl of mints to the potions master, a twinkle in his eye.
"No thank you Albus. I have urgent matters to discuss with you" Severus replied shortly "Matters surrounding Harry Potter".
"Do have a seat my dear man" said the headmaster, taking in Severus' grave expression with slight surprise. Taking the chair opposite Severus, he enquired "is this to do with the boy's poor health at the start of this year?"
Severus gazed at the headmaster "In some respects, yes. The boy has been suffering terrible abuse at the hands of his relatives. I believe we need to act fast to stop him from losing his identity altogether"
Dumbledore looked shocked. His grey brows knitted together, his forehead wrinkling in concern all while he watched Severus over the rim of his half-moon spectacles.
"I'm not following, Severus. What do you mean by abuse? Surely, no one is hurting the boy?"
"Dammit Albus, yes. They are most definitely hurting him. Those vile muggles are assaulting him daily, and not just with their words. You must have known!" Snape half shouted in frustration. "The boy allowed me to give him a dosage of veritaserum. The truths this revealed are…shocking to say the least. He is not well, Albus. He is in need of our help desperately."
Dumbledore surveyed the hook-nosed man before him. The same man who in the past had come storming into his office to complain about the 'little brat' and 'spoiled prince'. "I am unaware of any abuse, Severus. If I had know…I would have removed Harry immediately from his relatives' care."
Severus observed the customary twinkle disappear from Dumbledore's eyes and knew he was telling the truth.
"We must act now. We must also find the boy – he disappeared from my rooms in quite a fluster. He cannot be trusted to be alone at this time". Severus rose from his chair, wand drawn while Dumbledore whispered something in Fawkes' ear.
"Fawkes will lead us to him. Take hold of his tail, Severus"
Severus grasped the tail feather of the Phoenix, meeting Dumbledore's sad eyes as the three of them disappeared with a bang.