Author's note: Oh my gosh. I had the worst luck this weekend. I had a black out on Friday night, so couldn't post this. And then I had issues logging into this website and there was a widespread connectivity issue with this website for everyone as well, including me. So, I finally was able to finish and edit this for Sunday night instead of the usual Friday update.
This upcoming Friday will be a shorter update, told in another character's POV, instead of Kenshin's or Soujiro's, so keep an eye out for that. Otherwise, enjoy this late update! Rated M+ for strong sexual content.
"You only fuck for love
Told me you could never get enough
Posing as a Playboy centerfold
You could be my Penthouse Pet, I know"
- Cigarettes After Sex
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After that talk with my dad, we both go back downstairs to find Soujiro still sitting in that couch and going through his phone. I should know better, but I really hope he's not talking to his own father now. We're at the finish line, and now is not the time to backtrack or have any regrets; it's time to focus on what's in front of us and not towards the past. At the sound of our footsteps climbing down, Soujiro turns over his shoulder to look up at us, blinking curiously.
"Sorry about that," My dad chuckles, "Kenshin will grab your things and will show you where you'll sleep. I'm about to make myself some tea if you'd like any to be brought upstairs."
"Um.. Okay," Soujiro blushes lightly again, eyes flickering downward submissively, "Sure."
"Do you have a favorite flavor in mind? Oh, that's right, I've got a nice jasmine green tea that I brought home the other day. It's really good. Would you like that one?" My dad walks over into the kitchen area next to the living room now.
"S-Sure." Soujiro answers in time before my dad starts messing around with the cabinet in a fit of noisiness. Too many pots and pans, I swear.
"I'll have some too, dad!" I call out as I hoist the duffel bags into my arms where they were lying near Soujiro's feet, "Come on, Soujiro."
Soujiro doesn't respond to me as usual, but he gets up from the couch and follows me upstairs anyway. We walk down the hallway and I open a door that leads into the guest room. I don't know when's the last time anyone has been in here; my dad has done some renovations to this place and thankfully paid some attention to this room. The walls have a fresh coat of paint, there is a new mattress on the bed frame now, and everything looks clean and welcoming. It's a basic room, but at least Soujiro has a night stand with a lamp where he can put whatever he wants on it. It even has a little drawer in it.
"It doesn't have it's own bathroom unfortunately," I lower Soujiro's bags onto the carpet next to the bed, "We will have to share the one down the hall that's near my bedroom. But it's no big deal. Hiko fixed the bathroom, so it's really nice in there."
Soujiro takes a gander around the place, still not talking to me. His face is expressionless, and I am feeling some heat on my face. Does he think this room looks bad? I mean, it's a pretty basic looking place, in a house that's just as meager. It's definitely a far cry from what he is accustomed to his entire life; Soujiro's from a class where it's normal to have caviar every fucking night if he wants to. He's grown up in rooms where there is a guarantee that it'll have it's own bathroom, with a walk-in shower and everything.
There's a reason why I was hesitant to let him come over at my place.
And this is precisely it.
Soujiro's clearly not impressed.
Finally, for the first time since he yelled at me in the truck coming over here, he mutters in a tense voice, "Your mom.. didn't died here.. did she?"
I gape at him dumbly, and he looks back at me, waiting for my response. I snap out of it after a few seconds of staring at him and laugh awkwardly, "Oh! Uh, no, actually, she didn't! She died somewhere else, I think. I mean, I don't remember when, but no. She didn't died here. No one did. It's just a plain room."
"Clearly," He sighs, walking on over to the bed, "This bed fits two people.. do you guys have a lot of guests over?"
"Not recently."
He merely falls face first onto the bed, sighing deeply. I guess he's still exhausted from the long drive over here. I am a little tired and sore from all that driving too, so I guess we really need to take it easy for today. I just wish we aren't so strained around each other right now. But I guess I have to just own up to it: I fucked up today. Soujiro's mad at me, and he's not going to let up anytime soon. All I can do is just be nice to him and go back to my room to chill. We've spent a lot of time together recently, so maybe a break will do us some good.
"I'll bring up that tea for you when it's ready." I turn around to face the door. I don't hear Soujiro saying anything, so I just take my leave.
God. I hope today doesn't get any worse.
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My dad texted me that the tea is ready and to come get them. I come back upstairs with two cups of hotly brewed tea in my hands, ready to hand one over to Soujiro. I merely open the door of the guest room, where I find him still lying in bed. Not sure if he's sleeping or not, but he does have his eyes closed and didn't stir when I opened the door. He is now lying on his back and still in the same clothes from our adventures outside; maybe he should take a shower before getting into his lounge wear.
I place the cup of tea on his night stand and clear my throat. He still doesn't move or respond. I place my own cup of tea on the same night stand to lean over and place my hand on his shoulder, "Sou. Your tea is ready."
He grunts softly, his eyes fluttering open with a sleepy daze. His eyes glance over to my own and holds my stare for a few seconds, before he closes his eyes again and mumbles, "Thanks."
Okay. Maybe we are getting somewhere now. I smile at him, despite him not seeing it, "No problem. And after that, you can go ahead and take a shower if you want."
He doesn't reply at first, but then he opens his eyes to look at me. Those beautiful aquatic eyes, framed by those dark eyelashes. Man, he truly is beautiful. I wish more than anything to lean over closer and enclose those lips with my own. But I know I can't. I know he's still upset with me over what happened today. I lean back and take my cup of tea into my hands again, walking on over to the door to leave again.
"Kenshin."
I stop, my eyes flinching wider. Is he.. Is he going to talk to me finally? I hesitate before I slowly turn my head over my shoulder to face him, and he is now sitting up straighter in the bed, eyes squarely into my own. I wait. He's not saying anything, so I guess I have to answer him regardless.
"Yeah?" I mumble.
"Please.." His eyes frown and his cheeks redden a little, looking down at his lap, ".. Let me know when dinner will be ready. Okay?"
Silence. I can feel the pulls of a small smile coming over my face, and I finally nod, "Yeah. Don't worry. I will."
It's crazy. Soujiro's no stranger to me by now. I've known so much about him in these short few months than I have ever really learned about anyone else over my entire lifetime. Save for maybe Sanosuke and my stepdad, Hiko. But I don't know them in such a deep, intricate way like I do with the boy sitting right across from me. I know him in all the ways you can ever learn about anybody: body, mind, and spirit.
But, despite all of that, he still makes me nervous. He makes me feel like a little boy again, crushing hard over a schoolmate who's way beyond his league and would never look his way. He makes me feel like having to step up and give the person you like a gift, in the hopes that they would like you back. A chance against a million rejections from the stars, so to speak. He makes me feel like I am just a lowly photographer, taking pictures of the most beautiful and sought after model or celebrity.
Soujiro must've sensed my silent anxiety, because all of a sudden, one of his hand levitates from his lap and does a come hither motion. I turn around completely in confusion, and he makes a little sound with his mouth, like I'm some kind of dog that should come to him. I do so and take careful steps towards him. He leans on his palms and looks up at my expectantly, his blue eyes captivating me. A shiver runs up my spine as I can feel the all-too-familiar tingle inside my pants. Does he want to..?
He takes a hold of my shirt with his hand and pulls it downward, as if to demonstrate what I should do. I lean forward and he leans upward until our lips close the gap between us, and we hold that chaste kiss for a couple of minutes. He smells so humdrum, like the smell of a room that has been baked by the sun outside. But it's a peaceful kind of scent, and I like it. I like everything about Soujiro.
I love everything about him.
We separate naturally, and his hot breathe hits into my mouth as he breathes, "You owe me sex later on."
Oh. Oh fuck. My cock twitches and I inhale sharply, nodding, "Okay."
Jesus Christ.
He giggles, back to his old sunshiny persona, his hand that was on my shirt now sliding down to take a gentle grasp of my hard on. My hand that is holding my cup of tea trembles from that, but I keep everything steady. I don't want to drop anything scalding on him or on myself. He leans in to kiss my bare stomach after he lifts my shirt with his other hand. I bite my lower lip and can feel my cock stiffening. If he wants to fuck right now instead of later, I think we can. But just when I thought he was going to go any further, he takes both of his hands back and chuckles at my flushing face, "Well then! You go on back to your room, Himura! I'll be there after my shower."
"I.. Soujiro.." I stammer, my knees buckling from all of that bullshit that just happened, ".. Okay."
What can I say? Soujiro can turn me into a puddle even now. He's just that hot and sexy. He winks at me before going back to promptly ignoring me, moving away from me and taking his cup of tea to drink it from the bed side. I gape at him like an idiot for a few moments, before remembering that I have to leave now.
I close the door behind, exhaling deeply and blushing from all the way down to the strands of my hair.
God fucking dammit!
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Fuck, fuck, fuck!
I rush over to my dad's room where he has his own bathroom and turn on the shower to quickly get in, looking through his bottles to find what I'm looking for. Aha! Body wash! I flip the cap open and squeeze all over my body recklessly, before I rub my hands all over me. I even rub it all over my face and hair before I realized that it's one of those mint scented ones and nearly cry out in pain when it inevitably seeped into my eyes. I let the water rain all over my face to wash them out, rubbing my hands over my eyes to try to alleviate them.
The cup of tea is still in my room, but I haven't bothered to drink it. Not when I know I'm about to get laid.
I bathe myself and quickly get out before anyone suspects anything weird is happening. I run a towel quickly through my hair and dry the rest of myself off before leaving my dad's room. The coast is clear. I can hear my dad downstairs watching television like he always does on Sundays. I think Soujiro is still drinking his tea in the guest room. Perfect. I tip toe over to the door that leads into my bedroom, closing it behind me as I enter my room.
Okay. What now? Should I get dressed? I could just lie there naked for him, but what if dad comes in? That would be fucking awkward. I look through my drawers and duffel bags and decide to put on a t-shirt and long, checkered pajama pants. There. Should be laid back enough. I head on over to my bed and decide to turn on my own little TV. I don't know what dad is watching downstairs, but I'm guessing the local news. I switch it over to that channel and see that they're talking about the weather.
I take a sip of my tea, decide it's gotten too cold, and put it back on my desk with a defeated sigh. Oh well.
Apparently, there will be snow later on this week, which is exciting. I've had enough of global warming. It's January and there should be snow by now. Japan is so much prettier when covered in a blanket of ice anyway. Speaking of snow and all of that, I can't help but be reminded of what Soujiro said back then about Valentine's Day. As you may have already guessed it by now, I am not exactly a huge romantic at heart. I don't subscribe to stupid shit like commercialism and being some simp to somebody else. I think the whole thing is convoluted and fucking dumb for what is worth.
But.. I am also reminded that Soujiro still feel ashamed over who he is, deep down. And it finally clicks for me. Soujiro wants to have a normal Valentine's Day with someone for once in his life. I have to wonder if he ever celebrated that day like his other peers have. At this point, I don't think he ever did. He's obviously only interested in other guys, and there's no way in hell he had some other guy give him anything during that holiday. He went to some pretty prestigious institutions before with other rich kids who had powerful parents and all the reputation in the world to uphold. The scandal would have been way too much for them to handle.
Poor guy. I will definitely give him the best Valentine's Day ever.
I feel myself dozing off to the TV screen, the news anchor droning on and on about the live traffic feed and local happenings around town, when all of a sudden, I hear something. It sounds like a slow, low creak, and I blink towards where that sound is coming from. And then my breathing halts. Soujiro comes into my room, his hair wet and clinging on the sides of his face and forehead. He has on a sheer t-shirt on that looks gaseous against his damp skin, hugging his every curve of his waist and chest. There is a whisper of pink nubs poking through the shirt, and I realize in my delirious state now that those are hardened nipples. His underwear appears tight and sinuous with the way it binds over his crotch and buttocks, along with his slightly curved hips.
Those full lips. His clouded eyes. The paleness of his skin.
Fuck.
I couldn't move or breathe as he take his time walking on over to me. The only sound I can hear aside from my television is the rapid heartbeat inside my ears. Soujiro looks at the TV and takes the controller from my night stand to put it on mute, exactly how he did it from the hotel a couple of days ago. Before he gave me that delectable blowjob. Oh fuck. He's not gonna do that again, is he? I mean, that felt fucking incredible, but it was also annoying at the same time. I like it when he deep throats me instead.
"Hah, fuck.." I breathe, feeling myself stiffening and already excited as I sit up properly on my bed and watch him sit down on my bed next to me.
He giggles to himself, "Gosh, you're ready to go, aren't you?"
I nod a little too quickly, prompting him to snigger harder.
"Fine, then," His eyelids lower and he climbs over to me, pressing his finger against my forehead to let myself lie back down on the bed completely again, "But we'll have to be quiet. Your daddy's downstairs and could hear us."
I gulp, "Yeah."
I never want to have sex with anyone else ever again.
He moans as he starts to kiss me, and I groan in pleasure at this while running my hands over his back. He is still damp from his shower, which would help the sex feel so much better, I think. He's so warm against me and he smells so good. God, this guy is the best thing that's ever happened to me. To think we almost lost each other completely when I decided to go out with Kaoru back then.. amazing.
The clothes soon start to peel off from each other's bodies, little by little. We are careful with being as quiet as we possibly can, given the circumstances. We really can't afford to get caught by my dad. I mean, I'm already out to him and basically outed Soujiro as well, but he doesn't have to know about our private sex life. It's nobody else's business but our own. Once we are both completely naked, Soujiro starts to kiss my neck and travel downwards towards my chest, my stomach, lower torso, until he is near my dick.
I find myself breathing faster and taking in shallow gasps as he drags his hot, slippery tongue against my hard on. Once he reaches the head of my cock, he starts to suckle on it, saliva already dripping from his lower lip down to the length of my genitalia. Fucking fuck! I clutch my eyes close and grit my teeth, trying to silence myself as he starts to deep throat me in earnest. He rubs his hands over my inner thigh lovingly as he bobs his head up and down on my cock, the feeling of heat and wetness in his mouth absolutely insane to my senses.
"I guess I am forgiven, then?" I chuckle out of nowhere, and then yelp as I feel Soujiro taking a little bite on the side of my waist, "Ow!"
"I haven't forgiven you. Yet." He scoffs, going back to going down on me.
I shiver, biting my fist so that I don't moan out loud before I respond, "What did I do?"
He comes back up and slide over to me to kiss my cheek sweetly, "Aside from the fact that I am publicly humiliated? Nothing."
I look at him in surprise, "Are you talking about the rage room?"
"What else would I be talking about? Oh!" He sarcastically widens his eyes in mock surprise, "And of course, letting all your friends know that I got grounded despite me being an adult and all. I swear, it's like you enjoy making me into a spectacle."
Is he being fucking for real right now? Why would I take any pleasure or joy out of humiliating him? Does he really think that badly of me or something? Am I even hearing him correctly just now?
"Tell me you're joking." I flat out sneer at him, rolling my eyes.
"I'm not."
"You seriously think I would embarrass you in public? You're the one who decided to go ape shit on your own today, not me."
"I only learn from the best. You used to solve all your issues with violence. Or is that okay only when you do it? Don't act so hypocritical, Himura."
That does it.
I gripe and finally push him away, "Okay, fine! I get it. I'm a fucking asshole. You win."
He is sitting on his kneecaps now, looking at me as I glare from the other side of the room to avoid his eyes. Why the fuck are we like this! I thought he'd be thrilled to live with me, but so far we've been fighting like cats and dogs the whole way through. If he could at least just talk to me like a fucking adult like he claim he is instead of biting me or chewing me out, that would be great!
Honestly.. this is starting to hurt. Why isn't he happy to be here with me? Am I really that terrible to be around? Or is Soujiro just the type of person to have this much intimacy issues in general? I really hate to admit it.. I really just wish I didn't. But I have to wonder if maybe Soujiro was telling the truth all that time ago when he said he couldn't be in a relationship with me or anyone else. I'm starting to think he's not had a lot of experiences in knowing how to be a good partner when in a serious relationship.
I've more or less had a longish relationship with Tomoe when I was younger. And even if I did lead a wild, promiscuous lifestyle after her, I at least took some of those lessons and tried to apply them with Soujiro and Kaoru. But all Soujiro knows how to do is make guys cum and that's about it. Am I going to have to teach him how to be a better boyfriend? It's not that I mind, I'm just already so sick of being treated like this.
And then, I hear it.
I grunt in surprise as my head whips around at the sound of Soujiro crying softly into his hands. I shoot up to sit upright and take him into my arms immediately in a panic, whispering into his hair, "Baby, what's wrong? Why are you crying..?"
He sobs harder into my neck now, and I can't help but hold him tighter now, already feeling guilty. I must've looked like I was ready to dump him right here and then, and that probably scared him shitless. Oh fuck.
"Babe, don't cry," I move down so that I can start kissing his forehead, the bride of his nose, and his cheek, "It's okay. It's all going to be okay."
"Kenshin, I.. I.." His lower lips trembles as more tears starts to stream down his face, "I'm so sorry. I don't know what's gotten into me today.. I'm just so.. overwhelmed by everything. Everything bothers me.. but I.. I do love you so much, and I.."
I kiss his lips innocently before mumbling against it, "It's fine. I know it's hard. All of this is so hard. I'm so sorry, too. I should be more sensitive towards you.. this is all brand new to you, and I should.. Fuck, Soujiro, I'm just so sorry!"
He rubs his wet eyes against my face and I let him, continuing to trail my kisses down his jawline and near his chin meanwhile, "Please don't ever.. leave me.. Kenshin.. Please.. no matter how hard this gets."
Soujiro.
"I could never leave you."
".. Promise me."
"What?"
He takes my face and kisses me deeply, transporting me into a world that is warm, safe, light and floating. Just like the romantic kiss we shared underneath the school bleachers when I admitted to falling in love with him after he asked that girl out to the formal winter dance. It's a type of kiss that feels so desperate and hungry for more. Only this time, it was initiated by Soujiro instead of me.
Our lips separate and he whispers in anguish, "Promise me you will never leave me. Please."
I can feel my eyes waver as I look at this disheartened, beautiful boy before me. I nod once, touching the side of his cheek tenderly as I whisper back, "I promise."
He groans before maneuvering himself so that he is now sitting directly on top of my lap, sticking his own fingers into his mouth to coat them with a heaping amount of saliva, "Hnngh..!"
I pant, looking down in time as he wraps those slick fingers around both of our cocks together, stroking them in conjunction while my spine tingles in pleasure, "Soujiro..!"
"Haah, Kenshin!" He whispers weakly, rubbing our members harder and faster as the seconds pass us by. I couldn't help but slant over to plant my open mouth on the side of his neck to gnaw on it desirously, prodding him to arc his back and exhale in pruriency.
"Shh, please," I whisper into his ear, "Let's be quiet.. hah!"
"Mmm.." He nods, breathing into my ear now, "Kenshin.."
I smack my forehead in exhilaration as he goes even faster than before, gripping his forearms helplessly. This feels fucking fantastic. I don't know how long I can hold on, and neither can Soujiro, with the way he keeps gasping in pleasure.
"K.. Kenshin," He heaves deliriously, "You still.. have to cum in my ass.. haaah oh god!"
I whip my face back to take his chin with my hand and kiss him hard on the mouth, just to shut him up and taste that tongue of his again. God, especially that tongue! My body burns with desire the more he keeps touching us like this, and I know I'll cum any second now, so I take his wrist that has our cocks to stop him. Before we both know it, I have him on all fours on my bed, his face levitating above my pillow case as I'm eating his ass. He is biting down his moans of ecstasy as I dive my tongue deep into his hole, my hands grasping his cheeks to keep him close.
"Lick it, lick it, lick it, hah!" He breathes hotly into the curve of his arm as I groan into him.
Okay, so maybe he and I have a tendency to have these little bitch fits around each other. He and I are pretty different from one another; from the social classes we belong in, down from the we dress ourselves in our clothes. We don't even listen to the same music for the most part. But I guess that makes us devastatingly attracted to one another, I guess. Opposites attract and it makes the sex between us extremely hot. So, I can't exactly complain that this is how today's argument will end between us.
I stop eating him out and start fapping myself with one hand while spreading one of his ass cheeks with the other. I love looking into his gaping hole; it's still as bright and pink as back in the hotel room when he showed me his hole like the little slut that he is. I breathe heavily at the heavenly sight before me, trying to get myself over the edge as quickly as possible so that I can give this boy his much needed cum dump.
"Kenshin.." He whispers, and I can feel that familiar pull in my lower torso. I press the sensitive head of my cock into his tight hole, making him arch his back with a shiver, "Kenshin.. yes..!"
I am all the way in and carefully start to thrust into him. It only took a few gentle thrusts, but I came inside of him, biting my fist to quiet down my groan of exultation. All of this was pretty quiet since, again, we can't risk getting caught by my dad downstairs. Soujiro sighs happily at the feeling of being filled up by my semen, tilting his hips backwards to keep coaxing more cum into his hole until I'm completely all out.
I couldn't help but laugh a little, "Am I forgiven yet?"
Yes, I am an asshole.
He groans, "Yes, alright? Yes."
I lick my lips sinuously and reach around him to start masturbating him, prompting him to flinch at my touch with a gasp. I shush him and continue with stroking his cock, and he shivers helplessly at this while biting my pillow to keep it down. I haven't taken my cock out of his ass, but I don't want to leave this tight, warm feeling around me just yet. It feels way too good to get away from his hole. After just a minute of me going hard and fast on him, he cums hotly into my fingers. I let the back of my head drop and stare at the ceiling in a lusty daze, reveling in the feeling of his wet heat coating my hand as well as how his hole pulsates around my cock in intervals during his orgasm.
"Phew." I whistle.
He giggles airily, "How was that? Do you like having sex with boys now?"
My eyes flutter at that and I groan, "Yeah.."
I gingerly take my cock out of his ass. He keeps his bottom half of his body lifted towards the ceiling so that my cum can drain downwards instead of all over the bed. I open my night stand drawer next to the bed to grab some wet wipes and clean my hands with it. I take some to clean a little bit of the cum that's splattered against Soujiro's cheeks to make everything neat again as well as wiping my cock with the wipes. And all the while, I hear Soujiro humming happily from where he lays, which made me chuckle at his cuteness.
"I wonder how far cum can go inside a person's body.." I tilt my head questionably to the side, staring at his hole in wonder.
Soujiro thinks of this for a few seconds before replying, "Through my stomach, I guess."
I chuckle, "Or maybe all the way to your brain."
"Yeah.."
"Makes you fucking stupid sometimes."
"Kenshin."
I stop. He sounded serious when he uttered my name like that. I look down and I can see the side of his face, and his eyes look a little hurt by that comment. I hesitate for a moment before I grunt, "Sorry. I didn't mean that."
Silence.
"Don't make jokes like that anymore. I'm serious."
I grunt again, stunned.
"Our sex isn't funny." His eyes frown deeper at me.
"Sex..?"
He grits his teeth, his eyes avoiding me now, "The love we make isn't a joke."
I gape at him, surprised by this. Never the less, I run my hand over his back to comfort him as I start to apologize, "I'm sorry! I don't.. I don't think our love is a joke. You're right."
He grunts, grasping my bed sheet with his hand from where I can see it, "Exactly. The sex we have shouldn't be mocked."
Ah. I see now. He thinks I'm making fun of the "gay love" we share together. That has to hurt, after everything that's happened to him and to us. I get it now. God, my mouth really needs to make friends with my brain with the way I keep blubbering everything out like a fucking idiot. Why am I so harsh with people like this? Especially to the person I'm supposed to love and cherish?
Think of something, Kenshin, and do it quick!
"Our love.. is beautiful." I smile awkwardly, and his eyes flicker over to me, startled by that.
He blushes with a shy grunt, ".. You really think so?"
Oh, brother.
"I know so. What we have is so out of this world."
I'm trying, okay!
"Is it.." He pauses for a moment, blushing harder, "Better than what you had with girls?"
I nod, "Yeah. Seriously."
He blinks, and then smiles with a deeper blush, "Really?"
I groan, "How much more do I have to keep saying this kind of shit for you to get it?"
He giggles, "I'm sorry! It's just.. I like hearing you say it. I wish I could replay it over and over again.. Just so that I can keep listening to it."
I weaken at the sight of him so happy like this. His smile really lights up the room whenever he's in a good mood. I'm so happy that he's feeling better again. "What do you wanna do for the rest of today?" I lean over to kiss his tailbone.
He sighs, "We'll eat dinner with your dad and just hang out here? Not sure if I feel safe walking out that door right at this moment."
"Yeah," I sigh against his skin, "It's really not a good idea for you to be out and about at this time. Sorry."
He giggles, "I love how protective you are over me. It's sweet."
"Hey!" I lean back to balk at him, "I ain't no wimp!"
"Never said that you are! Just that you're so sweet!" He coos playfully at me.
"Pfft! Whatever." I scoff, crossing my arms across my chest.
He slowly sits up, turning around so that he can kiss my cheek, "I'm feeling a lot better, Kenshin. Thank you."
I give a little 'hmph' sound but give him a kiss on his cheek in return regardless, "Your welcome. And.. I'm sorry. About that stupid room."
He smiles, "You're too much. I forgive you, baby."
He called me baby. I'm weak. I sigh and kiss his other cheek lovingly before we press our foreheads together, just as we always have done whenever we want to have a moment of sheer intimacy with each other.
I love you, Soujiro.
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We had dinner with my dad. The food was great and even Soujiro started to open up a lot more than earlier today. Turns out, my dad actually likes Soujiro; he keeps asking Soujiro questions about himself, and seems pleased that Soujiro keeps asking questions about him. Questions about his past with me, the career he used to have, and how much he enjoys living here in the countryside with me. My dad talked about raising me when I was a little boy and how much of a pain in the ass I became when I entered my adolescence, which made me yell, "Dad!" at him, much to Soujiro's delight as he laughs at my face.
"It must've been hard raising him on your own," Soujiro sighs, taking his last bite of his meal, "Not that I'm calling Kenshin anything bad right now or anything. But being a single stepparent sounds rough."
My dad shrugs, "Eh, it was an adventure. My son knows how to keep life interesting which his shenanigans so that I'm always on my toes."
I shrink in embarrassment, "Come on, dad, I wasn't that bad!"
"Oh?" He looks at me sternly, "So all those visits from the police was just from my imagination?"
"Oh, come on, it was one time!" I groan. Soujiro continues to giggle at my expense.
"Yes, you got arrested one time, but you were caught many times doing stupid crap." My dad shakes his head with a heavy sigh.
"My dad would have never let me done anything that could get me arrested," Soujiro puts his cup of drink down with a shake of his head, "It would have been the grounding of the century at that point."
Ugh. I know we're just having a casual conversation right now, but can he really just not talk about his dad? I want him to forget about that old man and not reminiscent on the days gone by. But I guess it's going to take some time for Soujiro to move on from him; we're talking about the guy who helped his mom raise Soujiro ever since birth. It won't be easy to just up and forget about someone like that, even if they are incredibly abusive and evil.
"Soujiro," My dad gets up from the table, "I understand that you are staying over here with my son and I."
Soujiro looks at him stupidly before his eyes flicker downward shyly, "Y.. Yes, sir.."
My dad clears his throat, "Which, I don't mind, of course! But, I do have to say this: In this house, there will be no more secrets. I don't know if you know it yet, but Kenshin here basically told me that he is your partner."
Now Soujiro looks completely humiliated. His face starts to take on a rosier hue little by little as seconds go by.
"Dad, what the—!" I am cut off by my dad's death glare, and I whimper, "Bro, come on, I..!"
"Son, let me finish," He lifts his hand up to get me to shut up before he looks back to Soujiro, "I also don't mind that at all, either. What my son does is his business, as long as he is happy with whoever he wants to be with. I am not the bigoted type. But I'm worried about you, young man. There are many things I'd like to know about you, your father, and the Seta Enterprise. You can stay here all you want, but I need you to play by my rules at the same time. You got that?"
Soujiro's face could not be any more red even if he tried. Regardless, though, he nods quickly, "Mm-hmm!"
I wonder if Soujiro is going to chew my ass out later on for this. I probably deserve it, though.
My dad stares at him blankly for a few moments, and then he starts to chuckle in good nature, "Now, now! Let's not embarrassed! We'll uncover all of that in due time. For now, why don't you two help me out with the dishes before you head back upstairs. I'd like to have a quick chat about the daily chores that you will do around here to help out."
"Yes, sir." Soujiro whispers to his own chest timidly, but he does look back at my father with a more reassured smile now.
We start cleaning up together. My dad more or less stated the house rules for Soujiro to follow: No loud parties here, ever. No going out on school nights after 10:00 PM, and he wants us in bed at least by 11:00 PM. No drinking, no smoking, no drugs. My dad is aware of my own nicotine problems, but he's given me a pass on account of me more or less picking up after him when he spent so much of his time being a drunkard. But he expects Soujiro to not bring any new cigarettes into the house; if he can't deal with that, he'll have to take his smoking outdoors.
My dad expects Soujiro to also work hard on his studying. Just because he's here and no longer with his own dad, does not mean that he gets to be on vacation. He is to pick up after himself and keep the guest room spic and span. He'll be given a chore to do around the house at least twice a week to do, in rotation between me and my dad as well. My dad absolutely refuses to have anything to do with Soujiro's illegal activities and to not bring that mess into our residence. Honestly, I have never seen nor heard my dad behave so strictly with someone else before. When he tried to do so with me, I just rebelled against him, which made him give up in the end.
But I guess with Soujiro, he sees someone that he wants to see succeed no matter what. A tiny part of me feels that prick of jealousy seeing that energy between them, but I suppose this is just another reason why I should keep working hard at school; if nothing else, then to at least get back on my father's good graces.
Soujiro is super graceful about these rules and told him that he will follow all of these to a T. I suppose Soujiro being formally trained by previous institutions have helped him to become an obedient kind of person. I might have to teach Soujiro how to maybe clean up after some stuff, since he was also raised in an environment where he had the help to do these things for him and his family. It will be a learning experience for the both of us, I think.
We wash up and head back upstairs. Dad needed to work on some stuff on his laptop in his room while Soujiro and I went inside my bedroom. It's still early in the evening, and we decide to watch a movie. Since my dad seems to be paid quite well these days, he has brought us a subscription for digital media and now I get to watch some nice titles on his dime. I keep going through the titles on the screen and kept asking Soujiro if he'd like to watch this or that. Soujiro seems picky as most don't seem to tickle his fancy, but he did eventually decided on "Jaws".
"Why that one?" I blink at the screen but press play anyway.
Soujiro chuckles, "I haven't forgotten what you told me before. At the aquarium that we visited together, don't you remember?"
"Oh, yeah.." I lean all the way back on my bed and Soujiro climbs over me to glomp his entire body on top of me, "That it traumatized me as a kid."
He rubs his face against my cheek lovingly, "Mm-hmm. I think it's good to face your fears no matter what."
I wrap my arms around him and he kisses my cheek, to which I sigh: "Yeah. I'm glad you believe that."
Soujiro still has to face the fact that he is gay and that it will never change, even if he might wish otherwise. He has to face the fact that he is in love with me and can't have everything go the way he thought it should go, and still have me in his life at the same time. He has to face the fact that his dad will never accept him being the way he is and might not be the next leader of the Seta Enterprise because of that. Sharks are terrifying all on their own.. but being attacked by people because of the way you are born is a lot more common and deadly than swimming in the ocean and meeting your most unfortunate fate.
I used to think Soujiro was like a fox.. a natural predator to my rabbit spirit animal. But I think it's his dad that was the predator this entire time. His dad is the shark to Soujiro's worst nightmares. He's the one that always rips Soujiro's dreams and happiness to shreds every single time.
But now that he's here.. he's in safe waters.
We watch the movie peacefully, taking turns in kissing each other either on the cheek or on the lips, and I swear I have never felt this happy or at peace before in my entire life. I want this to be my life every single day. I want to always wake up next to Soujiro, and have me be the last thing he sees before he goes to sleep. I want to shower and bathe with Soujiro, and help him get dressed every morning before we have to go out. I want to cook and eat food with him all the time, and be the one to make him laugh instead of cry.
I want all of it with Soujiro. I want a future with Soujiro in it.
"Hm.. Kenshin.." Soujiro whispers softly as he rests his head into the crane of my neck, feeling our eyes growing heavier and heavier with exhaustion.
I have to wonder: What is Soujiro's ring size?
The movie ended. We do some homework and studying before Soujiro went to the guest room to get ready for bed. I wish I could be there to tuck him in, but that might be too obvious to dad if he catches us in the act. We already pushed our luck today with hanging out all alone in my bedroom after dinner, so for all of our sake, I just let Soujiro go on his own. Which sucks a lot, honestly. I hate being away from him. But we have to be respectful of my dad here, too. Even if he does seem accepting of our relationship, that doesn't mean he should be subjected to the awkwardness of seeing us behaving intimately together in front of him.
Soujiro already brushed his teeth before he went to bed, so now I'm in the bathroom brushing my own teeth. I went back to my room straight afterwards and turn out the light. The day seemed to have gone pretty quickly today, after so much has happened. The clock on my phone reads 11:13PM and I knew it was time for bed. I really hope Soujiro is okay in the guest room tonight.
Soujiro..
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[3:47 AM]
"Ken.. shin.."
I groan sleepily, my eyes flitting open to peer into the darkness in front of me. What was that I heard just now? I rub my eye with my fist before blinking to hopefully help with re-focusing my vision better. I blink around me and don't see anything except blackness everywhere. And then I hear it; someone stepping quietly towards me and I grunt in confusion, moving my body away from the sound. The bed I have was always set against the back corner of my room, with the headboard of the mattress near the window so that the sun can always wake me up for school in case my alarm clock didn't work.
The moon isn't out so it's extremely dark tonight. I can't tell who it is that is in my room now, but my surprise quickly melts into concern when I hear a familiar voice sobbing quietly to me, "Kenshin..!"
"Soujiro?" I mumble, taking my bed sheets off of my body and grabbing my phone so that I can turn on the screen. The soft light illuminates my room gently, and I can see the outlines of Soujiro's frightened expression and his troubled blue eyes, "Babe, are you okay?"
He doesn't reply but continues to cry quietly to himself, walking towards my bed so that he can join me. I merely scoot over to the side so that he can have space to climb into the bed, and I scoop him into my arms to embrace him. He finally breathes as I wipe the tears from his face to answer my question, "I had.. a nightmare.. about him.."
"Who? Your dad?"
"No. Okita."
I've heard of that name uttered from his lips before, but I never understood what was so important about that name. Soujiro mewls weakly into my neck as I cradle him in my arms, shushing him gently, "There, there.."
"I saw him.. trying to get into my bed, and I," He hiccups, his wet tears staining my t-shirt now, "I tried to kick him out, but he grabbed my legs and he got on top of me. And then he.. Oh, Kenshin, it felt so real!"
"Hey," I whisper, kissing his forehead, "It's okay. I'm right here. You just had a bad dream."
He nods understandably, "I know. I just.. wanted to come see you.. I'm so scared."
Man. It's his first night here and already he is plagued by nightmares. I could ask him who this Okita person is or what his relationship with them was like, but I really don't feel like re-traumatizing him if he's already this livid over a nightmare. Whatever happened between them must've been pretty bad, and it's my job to take care of him as best I could. I can't exactly banish him back to the guest room when he's so frightened right now as well. Poor Soujiro.
"You can stay here," I go through my phone to look through the alarm clock app, "I'll just wake up a little earlier than usual before my dad notices anything and I'll put you back into the guest room, okay?"
"You're okay with that?" Soujiro whispers. I smirk.
"Of course. I'll do anything for you, baby. This is nothing."
Silence.
"I never want to go back home.." Soujiro sniffles, "You make me so happy, Kenshin."
I sigh happily, "You're never going back. I won't let you."
I place the phone back on the charger and slide back down on the bed completely, snuggling Soujiro into my arms. He rests his head underneath my chin, nestling his face against my chest. He even couldn't help himself by entangling his legs over my own, and I chuckle under my breath at that. To which Soujiro heard me and groans, obviously annoyed, "What?"
"Nothing. You're adorable."
He sighs, "Thank you."
I am quiet now, the exhausting seeping into my eyes and pulling my eyelids down on its own. I can only hear the sounds of the softest winds trailing past my window behind the bed, as well as my own steady breathing as I try to get to sleep.
Soujiro whispers near my ear now, "Kenshin?"
Silence.
".. Kenshin?"
I exhale softly, the sleepiness washing over me as my consciousness fades to black.
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"I love you, Kenshin."
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[6:30 AM]
Vrr vrr!
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Vrr vrr!
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Vrr vrr!
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I groan, my phone now going off with a ring tone as it vibrates on my night stand table near me. I shut it off and feel a weight shifting next to me; I look down to find Soujiro wrapping my blanket around his body tightly, his face snuggling on my pillow underneath him. I sigh with a soft chuckle before I stroke the back of my finger against his face gently, "Sou."
No answer. I try again with my finger and call out his name in a whisper, "Soujiro.."
He groans finally, turning his face away from my finger.
"Sou, wake up."
He moans and finally mumbles, "Whu..?"
"Come on," I peel the blanket off from his body, prompting him to whine in annoyance, "I gotta take you back to your room.."
"Nnnnnoooooooo.." He merely snatches the blanket out of my hands and wraps it around his body again.
I groan while wiping my forehead exasperatedly, "Bro, come on."
He turns around and embraces me, shaking his head sleepily, "I dun wannaaaaa.."
I sigh and brush my fingers through his hair, "I know, but we can't."
He is silent, but never the less, embraces me tighter in protest. I merely wrap my arms around him before utilizing all of my sheer strength to haul him onto my lap whilst sitting up in an upright position, my legs draping over the side of the bed to plant my feet on the floor. I shift my bottom over to the edge to prepare myself to get up, but.. Soujiro's super heavy in the morning. I mean, he's quite hefty no matter what despite his slender appearance, but for some reason, the early morning turns him into a bag of rocks.
How am I supposed to get up now?
I take in a breath to prepare myself, and I try to lift my bottom off from my mattress. I was only able to levitate up for a couple of seconds before I nearly smack my ass back down on the bed. I groan in frustration, "Sou!"
He leans back so that he can look at my face with a sleepy smile, giggling, "I'm sorry.."
"Come on, man.." I start to whimper pathetically into the crane of his neck, his scent calming me down despite the circumstances.
"Alright," He sighs, "I'll move."
He kisses my temple before he gets off of my lap, and we head towards my door together. I open my door slowly and carefully, peering into the dark hallways to see if I can hear or see my dad. He's still sound asleep. I take Soujiro's hand into my own and lead him back to the guest room, where I let him crawl back into bed. I doubt my dad would knock or come into Soujiro's room to check up on him, but I'd rather my dad find Soujiro in his own bed instead of mines. As I tuck Soujiro into bed, he looks at me with these sorrowful eyes that keeps stabbing my heart with pity.
"Does it have to be this way?" He mumbles, rubbing his face against my cheek lovingly.
"I'm sorry," I sigh, kissing his cheek, "We can't be in the same bed together while you're living here with us. Dad's rule."
He gulps and nods, sighing, "Okay.."
"He and I will wake up in an hour from now on, so I'll come back here to wake you up and you can get ready for school. Hiko will drive us to school if you don't feel like taking the public bus down the road."
He laughs quietly to himself before sighing, "I wish I had my car with me. Would be nice to have you experience a nice car ride before school begins."
"Tch. I don't need any luxury anymore. I'm with you because I love you, not for your money."
"Really?" He smiles drowsily, "You really mean that, Kenshin?"
"I'm serious as cancer," I lean in to kiss his lips innocently, "Now shut up and go to sleep."
He kisses me back for a few seconds, breaking away to whisper against my lips, "I love you, Kenshin."
"Wuss," Is all I could mutter playfully before I stand away from the bed and walk away, "Night."
He doesn't respond, and I take my leave, careful to close the door behind me silently so as to not rouse the other resident in this house. Maybe one day.. Maybe someday.. Soujiro and I can live together in private, and we won't have to keep saying goodbye like this anymore. Maybe I can find a summer job after high school is over so that I can find a place for us to rent somewhere. Just so that we can always sleep and wake up together without having to worry about disturbing other people.
The things we do for love.
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[7:30 AM]
My official alarm goes off and I promptly turn it off. I manage maybe a couple of winks of sleep since I placed Soujiro back into his room. It's now time to go back there and find him. I leave my room to go to his room, only to find the door slightly opened. I blink in confusion, opening the door completely to find Soujiro missing in action. I grunt, looking around and trying to find any sign or hint of him, to no avail. And then I hear something in the distance, turning my head to the side to see, down the hallway and toward the bathroom door, the sound of running water.
Soujiro woke up already? I guess I didn't have to visit him after all. I scratch the back of my head, yawning sleepily. I think I need to carry myself a thermal of coffee to get through today. I hope this is the only time I would have to sneak around so early in the morning; Soujiro has to stay in the guest room and he has to respect that rule, or else this living arrangement isn't going to work out. As much as I wish he can sleep next to me, I can't afford to have my dad get pissed off at me and make me kick Soujiro out when he's down and out like this.
I go back to my room to arrange my clothes for the day; a long sleeved grey shirt with a band name on it, ripped jeans, boxers, socks, studded belt, and my leather jacket that Soujiro brought me what feels like a long time ago now. It has to be the most expensive thing I own right now, and it still looks as badass as it did the first time I tried it on. I smirk, remembering that fond memory all too well.
My door is being knocked on, and I hear my dad's voice on the other side chirping, "Morning!"
"Hey." I call out casually, cracking my neck. He always does this. Every morning. It's become an old ritual between us now.
I hear my dad going down the stairs to start the coffee and breakfast, and I can hear the running water shut off from the next door down. Soujiro must be done with showering and brushing his teeth. It's my turn now. I wait patiently as I hear his footsteps coming, expecting him to go back to his room. Instead, my door creaks open and I see him peering over the corner of my door shyly. I balk at him.
"Sou!" I hiss, "Get back in your room!"
He groans childishly, closing my door again. Is he crazy?! If my dad found out that a butt naked Soujiro tried to come into my room, he'd be livid! I hear Soujiro's bedroom door close, and I take that as my signal to come out now. I strip myself naked and walk out into the hallway, again, expecting something normal. Like being alone in the hallway and peacefully going on my way towards the bathroom, just as I have always done over the years of living here with my dad.
Instead, I come face to face with Soujiro, who is naked except for a towel wrapped around his hips. I couldn't even find it in my voice to yelp or scream or anything, opting to just gape at him in shock as he leers at me like a fucking pervert.
"Well now," He chuckles as he takes a good look at my nether regions, "Good morning to you, too."
I grunt, my face feeling extremely hot now. I hiss once more at him, "Do you mind?!"
He smirks at me deviously, "Not really. It's a nice cock."
I shake my head, incredulous over his behavior right now. Now is not the time to play around! I ignore him and try to walk away from him, when he snatches my wrist and walks on ahead of me to drag me into the bathroom. He locks the door and attacks my mouth with his, moaning as I writhe against him. He prides my lips open with his tongue to forcefully intrude inside of my mouth with it, and I groan in pleasure (as well as in frustration!), stiffening in surprise as I feel his hand traveling down to start stroking my cock.
"Sou," I pant as soon as I yank my face away from his, "Not here!"
"Why not?" He moans and tries to kiss me again, to which I avoid it in time, "Hmm?"
"Dad's downstairs, goddammit," I shake my head, "We can do this after school if you like, okay?"
"But that's.." He pouts at me in jest, "That's like almost eight hours from now!"
I sigh, leaning my forehead against his, "I know. I'm so sorry."
We're quiet now, and I can feel this silence deepening by the second. I grunt, not liking this. Is Soujiro going to be mad at me about this? I mean, I can't help it. I can't just go and disregard my dad just because Soujiro is feeling frisky and horny. As much as I want to fuck him, I know that right now it's a horrendous idea. I'm doing all I can to make this living arrangement work, no matter how difficult it might be at times.
Soujiro finally leans his head back to separate our foreheads and mumbles, "I'm sorry if I'm so attracted to you."
"Soujiro."
He scoffs, "I mean, truly, I'm sorry that I'm so in love with you!"
"Soujiro.."
"I'll take my leave now," He turns away from me so that he can reach the doorknob, when I whip him back around and start to kiss him, and he yanks his lips away from my mouth to cry out, "What now?!"
"Soujiro, please.. just.. be reasonable.." I chuckle sadly, "Isn't that what you always used to tell me? When we had to hide ourselves?"
He looks on at me with surprise, and he takes a few moments to come back with, "That was different. We had to live apart."
"It didn't matter," I shrug with a smile, "Here, apart, anywhere. We have to hide ourselves."
"And does that.." He asks carefully, "Bother you at all?"
"I'd do anything for you, Soujiro, so no, not really."
He softens and weakens at that, leaning his forehead against mines again, sighing, "Okay, I'm.. I'm sorry. I just want to be free to love you all I want. Is that so wrong?"
"It's not. But until we live together somewhere else.. we have to live with what we've got for now."
Silence.
"I just wish.. we didn't live in a world like this." Soujiro gulps, clutching his eyes shut in pain.
I nod, sighing, "Yeah. I agree."
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Poor Soujiro.
I'd do anything to give you a world where you belong.
(To be continued...)