Author's note: The song playing in Kaoru's room is "I Never" by Rilo Kiley, just as a point of reference! Enjoy!
"The men who flirt with me are
Ironically always similar to him for some reason
My memories with him are overlapped
Don't ask me why even if I drop my glass and suddenly glisten with tears"
- Mariya Takeuchi
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
"I'm only a woman
Of flesh and bone
And I wept much, we all do
I thought I might die alone"
"Kaoru-chan, let me in!"
"No! I'm not ready yet!"
"Come onnnnn, I need to see if the dress fits!"
I sigh, rubbing my temple frustratingly, "Fine. You can come in!"
"But I
Had never, had never, had never, had never, had never
Never, had never, had never, had never
Never, had never met you"
My little cousin, Ayame Gensai, opens my door and gasps with glee, "Kaoru, you look so beautiful!"
I hum questionably at myself, turning and twirling myself so that she can get a better look of the dress all around, "You think so?"
"I know so! We should have my mom and Suzume look at you, too!"
I blush and scoff, "What! No way!"
"So, baby, be good to me
I got nothing to give you, you see
Except everything, everything
Everything, everything
All the good and the bad"
"Why not?" She pouts and walks in so that she joins the reflection of the vanity mirror in front of us both now, "Don't you want them to see you?"
I grimace at her reflection and huff annoyingly, running a brush through my long hair now, "Don't be ridiculous."
"Ugh," She rolls her eyes, pointing her finger at my smartphone now, "Ever since you moved in here with us, you've been so snippy! Even the music you listen to are so depressing!"
"'Cause I've been bad
I've lied, cheated, stolen
And been ungrateful for what I have
And I'm afraid habits rule my waking life
I'm scared and I'm running in my sleep, for you
But all of the oceans, and rivers, and showers'll
Wash it all away and make me clean, for you"
I halt my brushing, contemplating on what she just said. It's true that so much of my life has changed ever since that night when my ex-boyfriend admitted to cheating on me with our friend, Soujiro. It has been a roller coaster of emotions for me ever since; between crying non-stop at home and in the school bathrooms, I wasn't able to focus much of my studies or taking care of myself at all. I was always someone who strive to keep in great physical shape and mental health, by working out, doing yoga, writing in my journal, and eating a well balanced diet.
Even my friendships with the old gang suffered.
I would go in and out of focus during conversations, and Megumi would ask me if I was okay, while Misao would freak out and think I was about to faint in front of them. I learned recently that, when faced an incredibly emotionally painful life event, that you can experience dissociation. I would read about it non-stop ever since I've moved in here with my aunt and uncle.
The truth is, nothing has been the same ever since I got my heart broken.
"At least let me put on my makeup before they come in here." I mutter to Ayame, who just sighs in defeat.
"Fine." She pouts before flinging herself on top of the bed that I've been sleeping on ever since I moved in here, and starts playing on her phone. It's crazy how young she is and how technically advanced she is already. This new generation is really starting to scare me.
I look back in the mirror, into my tired eyes.
"'Cause I
Had never, had never, had never, had never, had never
Never, had never, had never, had never
Never, had never, had never, had never
Never, never met you"
I tried. I tried so hard to just swallow my pride, and stuck around in Kyoto for a while after my devastating breakup with Kenshin. But every time I saw him, or every time I saw Soujiro, I am reminded of what I lacked deep down. I lacked all the things that would have interested Kenshin, and kept him by my side. I lost to someone with whom I could never succeed in competing against. Soujiro Seta, a young man who was born into a world full of lush luxuries and privilege, who could command attention wherever he went due to his good looks and charms, and as it turns out.. the young man who could satisfy Kenshin in a way I never could, who ended up being the one who won against me.
That Soujiro.
"So lets take a loan out, put it down on a house
In a place we've never lived
In a place that exists in the pages of scripts
And the songs that they sing
And all of the beautiful things
That make you weep
But don't have to make you weak"
I know that I can't compete. I know I had no way of winning or making Kenshin mine, no matter how strongly I used to feel for him. I am but a simple, ordinary high school girl. I come from a humble background much like Kenshin has. Much like anyone in the gang have, actually. I am, by all accounts, a pretty young girl, but Soujiro has a distinguished appearance that looks almost exotic in contrast to my features. It's stupid, really, but.. even if my own eyes were blue, his were more penetrating and breathtaking; even if I do possess such lovely skin, it's his that is the color and feeling of the freshest milk. Even if I have a nice smile, or nice hair, or a nice figure.. somehow, someway, Soujiro always manage to look so much better than me.
People always say that a lot of the times, you're not ugly, you're just poor. I used to think it was such a silly and harsh way of seeing things. But after everything that's happened, I realize how true that statement really is. If I had more money, I might've been able to capture Kenshin's attention. Kenshin really pretended otherwise, when we were all friends and struggled together, that he would never fall for such a shallow, stuck up, materialistic person. But now look at him. Look who he is in love with. Look who he is going through all this trouble for.
Look who he got his face split open in a vicious fight against Shishio.
It's Soujiro.
It was always going to be him.
It is always going to be him, period.
My self-esteem took a huge beating from this. I stopped eating and wasn't able to sleep at all, and that was when my mom told my dad she's had enough of this. That she will be sending me to Hyogo with her sister and her husband. My dad was absolutely furious when she suggested that, because at the end of day, I will always be his little princess. He would rather die than let anyone else take care of me. But mother knew better, because she saw the red tint in my eyes, and she knew how horrible it is to be heartbroken when you're a vulnerable, teenage girl.
Honestly.. Thanks, mom.
"'Cause I
Never, have never, have never, have never, have never
Never, have never, have never, have never
Never, have never, have never, have never
Never, have never, have never, have never
Never, have never, have never, have never
Never, have never, have never, have never
Never, have never loved somebody
The way that I loved you"
When she sent me to live out here with my uncle and aunt, I'll admit, I was resistant to the idea at first. I knew I would break the hearts of my old friends back in Kyoto when I had to leave them behind, but mom thought it was for the best. I had admitted to her that it was Kenshin who I went out with, and whom I had to break up with, and that was why I felt so terrible. She was not happy to hear that at all; if anything, she wished I could have dated somebody else entirely. She never really enjoyed the fact that I have been friends with the boy who has an alcoholic stepfather, and to now know that I have been out with him made her incredibly upset. She told me I could have done so much better, that any other guy could have been a much better fit for me than with Kenshin.
If it were me months ago, I would have vehemently disagreed with her and fought for his honor. Kenshin and I shared a deep friendship that lasted for many years, ever since we were practically babies. I would have never let her get away with spitting on his name like that, especially over things he had little control over. But now that I've spent the last several weeks out here with my other family members.. I'll admit, I do now see where my mom is coming from. I've done everything for Kenshin as his dear friend, and it isn't fair that this is how he decided to pay me back.
By going out with me out of pity. By agreeing to being my boyfriend all because someone else rejected him. By lying to me about his whereabouts. By taking my innocence when he had no intention of staying with me. By cheating on me.
By choosing someone else over me.
The song that's playing on my phone continues with it's long winded instrumental ending, and I am done with applying my makeup. I turn towards Ayame, and she looks up to me at the same time before she gasps in wonderment.
"You look stunning!" She gushes.
I tuck some hair behind my ear meekly, "You think so?"
She giggles, "I know so! Now can I invite my mom and Suzume in here?"
I sigh casually, "Sure."
She shuts her phone off and stands up on the bed, looking at me for a while. This thirteen year old girl seems pensive as she stares right into my eyes, and I blink at her, silently asking her what's wrong. Finally, she hums and puts her hands on her hips, tilting her head to the side, "Hey, Kaoru?"
"Yeah?"
"I don't think that guy ever deserved you."
My eyes widen in sheer surprise, grunting.
"Who are you.. talking about?" I look to the side, my smile feeling forced and awkward. She stares at me in a deadpan manner meanwhile, not buying into my pretending to not know who she is obviously talking about.
"I'm talking about that idiot, Kenshin. He never deserved you at all."
I know. I know I should hate him more than anything in the world. And the truth is, I do hate what he has done to me. I feel like I've been treated cruelly by him and Soujiro without an ounce of care towards my feelings, or like I somehow deserve to be thrown away on the side so they can rub it in my face about it later. I should hate the both of them with all of my heart and soul.
But then.. every time someone tries to talk badly about Kenshin, all I can feel inside my heart is that familiar prick of pain. The pain that I should hate him deep down, but can't for some reason. I hate the actions he took against me. That's a given. But I can't hate the boy that I've known for so long. If we had never gone out, would I still be hurt that he's with Soujiro? I don't know. I don't suppose I'll ever know. I am more hurt over the fact that he thought I was so pathetic in my feelings towards him that he decided to go out with me just so I could stop looking at him with puppy dog eyes.
...
Ah. There it is. That righteous anger. I can feel my face slowly simmering in heat as I mull over that thought some more. Kenshin thinks I'm nothing but a stupid little girl who leads a unfortunate life, living in strife and in near poverty just like he has. What could be something that can bring us together, has made him look down on me in the end instead. And that's what makes me feel so bitter now. I thought Kenshin would see my bad luck as something that he can fall in love with, something that could bring us closer together as a couple.
Instead, he saw Soujiro's privileges and fell in love with that over my adversities in life.
"You're right, Ayame.." My eyes flicker over to her, catching her by surprise, "You're absolutely right."
Her surprised expression softens to a concerned frown now, and she takes her time in walking towards me. She gives me a gentle hug, whispering near my ear, "You really don't have to talk to him ever again if you don't want to. I'm dead serious."
I sigh, "He and I go way back, Ayame.."
"So?"
".. We share friends together.."
"So?"
I have to laugh at least a little bit, leaning back so that she can look at my face again, "Ayame. I can't just drop him. He and I have to share friends and that's going to be hard if I'm just going to stop talking to him."
"Kaoru," Her eyes waver as she looks at me, "You can always have your friends. You can always make new friends. You can't have your heart back the way it used to be, thanks to him."
I gulp dryly, my eyes fluttering down to avoid her gaze now, "I know.."
"What he's done is unforgivable. I will never forgive him for what he's done to Kaoru-chan."
Please stop talking, Ayame. My heart can't take this pain anymore. I can feel the threat of hot tears springing into my eyes now, and at that moment, my door opens to welcome in a new guest.
"Kaoru, dear, are you.. Kaoru!" A female voice is in my room now, and I look towards the door to see my aunt, who is now rushing over to where I'm sitting at to start fussing over my tears, "What's happened? Why are you crying?"
I open my mouth to speak, but then decide to close it. I instead start crying into my hands, sobbing bitterly, "It's nothing.."
"What did you say to her, Ayame?" My aunt chastises the younger girl next to us.
"I didn't say anything! All I said was that she shouldn't ever talk to Kenshin ever again because he's a jerk!"
"Oh," My aunt sighs, "Ayame.. This is something only adults can handle. Kaoru is not a little girl anymore. What she decides to do is all up to her, not us."
"But Kenshin cheated on her!"
"And if she never forgives him for that, then that is also her choice. Whether or not she wants to speak to him is not for us to decide, Ayame. Now go to your room."
"What!"
"Ayame!"
"Okay!" I hear Ayame nearly stomping her way out of my bedroom, slamming the door shut.
"Oh, that rotten girl! Kaoru, dear, I'm so sorry for my daughter's behavior.." My aunt starts to comb through my hair with her fingers, "I must say, though.. You look absolutely beautiful tonight. Aren't you excited about your date?"
I gulp and sniff, wiping my tear stained cheeks messily, "I-I am, Aunt Toki. Thank you."
"Oh, goodness, now your mascara is running down your face," My aunt reaches over on the vanity table to grab some makeup remover wipes, and gently starts to clean up the mess below my eyes, "There, there. I am so sorry that you're going through this. This must be so hard for your sensitive heart. Believe me, this is such an injustice. Although.. I do hate to admit it.. But I do think my daughter is right. Kenshin is crazy to have lost you. Any boy would be so lucky to have you."
"Then why did he..!" I exhale emotionally, nearly clutching my chest, as if trying to reach into my heart to squeeze it out of me, ".. Why did he hurt me like that!"
She watches me carefully and with concern in her eyes, contemplating on what to say next. She nods her head and hums, "You know.. Your mother got cheated on, too. When she had another boyfriend in her younger years, I mean."
"Huh?" I blink. Where did that come from? Why is that relevant right now?
She had to laugh at my befuddled expression, "Surprised? I sure was. Your mom was a knockout when we were in high school. The guy was a total loser compared to her. And yet, he cheated on her. Go figure."
"Mom got cheated on?" My eyes widen at this new piece of information.
"Mm-hmm!"
".. But then.." I close one eye as she gets around with wiping the blackness of the mascara from my cheek, ".. Did you two ever found out why he did that to my mom?"
"Honestly," She sighs, grabbing more wipes, "I did confronted that idiot a couple of years after the fact. If nothing else, then to at least find closure for your mother if she ever asked about why he did that to her. And do you wanna know what he told me? He told me that it's because he realized that there was no way in hell he could have made your mom happy in the long run. So he did the cowardly thing and cheated on her, as if to give her that push to end things with him rather than doing the dirty work himself. Now, I don't really know this ex-boyfriend of yours too much, and I don't know what exactly happened between the two of you. Maybe his reasons are a lot different than your mother's ex.. but I will say this; sometimes, guys do terrible things to good girls because they aren't mature yet to know a good thing that's in front of them, until they lose them completely."
I look towards the floor now glumly, ".. Aunty.. I don't know.. I think Kenshin just really never liked me like that at all. This other gu.. girl.. she is a lot prettier than me. More money than I do, too. I guess maybe Kenshin's a lot more shallow than I thought.."
"Well then, there you go. That's his vice and his flaw. He's a shallow jerk. Why would you want someone like that?"
I blink at her in surprise, "What?"
"What?" She repeats my question back at me with a smug smile, "Kaoru, be real with me. How can anyone look at you and think that you're not pretty? You're the furthest thing from the words 'not pretty', especially when this guy that's about to pick you up is crazy over you. And you met him only the last few weeks! Do you know how many times I had to tell him to stop calling the house phone because he's annoying the rest of us?!"
Okay, that got me. I start to giggle, "I'm sorry! I should tell him to stop that tonight!"
"You better! He's getting on my nerves," She sighs, "Well then, I cleaned you up nicely, so go ahead and reapply your eye makeup so that I can send you off to this dolt. And Kaoru?"
"Y-Yes?" I blink at her again, blushing shyly.
"Nothing. You're just so beautiful," She cups my cheek lovingly, "And smart. And wonderful. And sweet. And totally better than Kenshin. You remind me so much of my sister, it's crazy. You are going to be okay. I raised your mom to be no fool, and I sure don't raise any fools in this household, including you. Okay?"
I stare at her in awe, completely beloved by just her words alone. In that moment, I realize that I wasn't alone in this pain after all. She's right. I never did anything to deserve what Kenshin put me through. I've never even done anything to Soujiro to make him want to be the other man and have Kenshin cheat on me with him. I deserve so much better than all of that.
I nod, "Thank you, Aunty. I love you."
She kisses my forehead, "Love you too, pumpkin."
She leaves my room, and I am sitting here alone again. Perhaps it's not the fact that Kenshin cheated on me that hurts me the most. What hurts me the most, was realizing that my friendship with him meant nothing to him at all. If it did, he would have never done any of that. He wouldn't have even asked me out if he knew that his heart was with Soujiro the entire time. He would have loved me as a friend too much to do such a thing. And yet, he did. He did all of those things.. All just to hurt me.
And I can't help but ask myself, why?
Just when I was going to mull over this even more, my smartphone pings with a new text message. I read it and it's from my date. He's here. I sigh, fluffing up my hair and doing an outfit check in the mirror once more before heading out.
.
.
.
"Wow.."
I close the door of my uncle's and aunt's town house behind me, smiling at my date. It's funny, but I think he's a real cutie. I don't know if this is such a good idea, though. How often do you have to explain to people that you kind of, technically, started dating your ex boyfriend's ex girlfriend's older brother? Standing tall and proud, Enishi Yukishiro is wearing a black turtleneck underneath a sporty jacket, Levi jeans, and white running sneakers. His spiky white hair, with his bangs nearly overshadowing his incredibly dark blue eyes, ties his otherwise edgy look incredibly well.
We met by accident when I was out food shopping with my cousins, Ayame and Suzume. We needed to get supplies for my aunt's soup supper, and basically collided my shopping basket against Enishi's cart. I was so apologetic over it, but he laughed it off. He figured that if I was really that sorry, that I should give him my number. I remember feeling so confused and embarrassed, because he looked so handsome that day. There was no way a guy like him could ever like a girl like me; he could've easily gotten any other girl to go out with him that very night if he wanted to.
But he was persistent, and I was too nice. And here we are now, just three weeks later. Or maybe it's been a month. I'm not sure. He and I have been texting and calling each other regularly since then. Apparently he and his sister's parents have been divorced for a very long time now, so Tomoe stayed with her mother, and he stayed with his father. Sometimes they would go to each other's houses during the winter or summer when school was out, but I never met him until now. I did remembered meeting Tomoe once or twice when I was very little, and I do remember Kenshin dating her when he was around sixteen or seventeen years old.
Other than that, though, I don't remember much about the Yukishiro family. So imagine my surprise when he slipped out his sister's name and I connected the dots. That's when he asked about Kenshin, since he was aware of Tomoe's relationship with him back then. I told him I wasn't sure, because I've moved out here to start over again after some hard times, making sure to not tell him the real reasons.
I don't think he would like it very much if he knew.
"You look.." He starts again, eyeing me up and down in a surprisingly chaste manner, "Stunning."
"Oh, stop it." I roll my eyes, giggling never the less. Maybe it feels good to have someone else telling me how beautiful I am after getting my confidence ripped to shreds by my ex. Maybe there's nothing wrong in feeling proud of that fact tonight.
"I'm serious!" He gushes, taking my hand and lifting it up over my head to start twirling me around, "Is that a new dress? It looks great."
As soon as I face him again, I blush harder and smile demurely, "It is. Thank you."
He smiles charmingly, and we head towards his car that's parked not too far from the street. He drives us to a nearby restaurant that specializes in Korean barbecue. We talk about school and where we want to go in the future; he says he wants to become a medical doctor, and I said I wanted to study mathematics. It's a bit nerve wracking that we're talking about our respective futures like this, because it means that there is a possibility that we're trying to see if we can fit into each other's plans.
I know that it's good to move on from the past. I know that I'm doing good by going out, dating again, and studying hard so that I can go to a good school after high school is over.
But sometimes.. Sometimes it catches up to me when I ask myself, why? Why couldn't it be me?
"Kaoru," Enishi takes the meat out of the little mini grill that is in the center of our table to place it on his plate, "You look sad. What's wrong?"
"Huh?" I blink out of my daydreams and look at him, "I'm sorry, did you say something?"
One of his eyebrow crinkles and he smirks at me, shaking his head, "You're spacing out again. You do this sometimes. What's up?"
I blink at him before feeling my shoulders drooping and my eyes lowering down at the grill again, "It's.. It's nothing.. I mean.. I sorta had an emotional talk with my aunt today before you came over, so I guess I'm still worked up over it."
"Emotional?" He perks up, "What did you two talked about?"
"It's nothing, really."
"It is something. I worry about you, Kaoru."
Please stop. I don't deserve this kindness.
I sigh, "Really, Enishi, it's not—"
"—Kaoru," He interrupts me, knowing exactly what I was going to say and I gape at him in shock, "It is important. Because you're important to me."
I stare at him for a while, and then I couldn't help but laugh quietly to myself, "We only met just a month ago. How are you so sure that I am important enough for you to worry about me?"
He grunts, caught by my question. He frowns at his own plate to scrutinize over my question in his head. Poor Enishi. I did not mean to put him on the spot like this. I just figured that this is all brand new and that he would have needed more time to be certain about falling for me. Isn't that how it works with boys? Don't they need like a lot of time to figure out if you're worth it or not?
Finally, he mumbles, "I know we just.. met.. But Kaoru.. You really take my breath away."
Now it's my turn to grunt and look at him like he's lost his mind, ".. What?"
He blushes and looks to the side, looking completely embarrassed, "I know it's.. odd to say that out loud. But it's true. I think you're stunning. Smart and wonderful. And so sweet to everybody around you.. Your little cousins look up to you and even I could tell on the day when we first met. You really have everything going for you."
His eyes turn to me and he makes a startled sound when he sees the tears now overcoming my own gaze, and he reaches over to touch my hand with his own.
"Kaoru?! Are you okay?"
I look at his hand on top of my own. He really said all of that without any hesitation. I really am all of those things to him. But then, why wasn't I any of those things to Kenshin? Especially since he's known me for a lot longer than Enishi has? Wouldn't Kenshin have figured all of that out much earlier in our lives? Instead, he thought I was just good enough to make someone else jealous and then dumped me as soon as that other person pleaded him to come back. I wasn't beautiful to him at all. I wasn't smart enough in his eyes or kind, or special or anything like that!
I..
"Kaoru.. What was it that you and your aunt talked about tonight?"
Enishi's voice is so sweet and so concerned about me. I look at him again and I finally muster up the courage to tell him the truth: "I.. was crying to her about my break up with Kenshin. He.. He cheated on me."
His eyes widen with a startle, and we look at each other for a while. The entire restaurant is bubbling with lively conversations between the patrons in all the other tables away from us, and are completely oblivious of this moment between us. Everyone is having a great time tonight, except for me. There is a soft melody playing on a jukebox not too far from us, in order to create a serene ambience to this place that would have made this night a special one.
It's too bad I ruined it, just like how I always ruin everything else.
Enishi's face finally softens to one of pure sadness and he whispers, "Kaoru-chan.. I'm really sorry you went through that."
What?
He's not mad that I went out with Kenshin? He doesn't pity me all of a sudden for being the girl who got cheated on? Or that I got left behind for, not just for another girl, but for a boy instead? I stare at him with a disbelieving frown, ".. What?"
"I said I'm sorry you went through that," He blinks with his own confused frown as well, "Was that bad of me to say?"
"Oh. No. I. Um.." I feel my cheeks flaring up and I look at my plate clumsily, "I thought.. You would think badly of me or something.."
"Why would that I think that about you? It wasn't your fault that you got cheated on. That happened because of Kenshin, right?"
"I.. guess so.."
"So why are you acting like it was you who got caught cheating?"
Enishi.. If only you knew the horrible truth.. I bet you would take that back. I look at him now with determination, deciding that I should keep that a secret longer. There's just no point in bringing up Soujiro's name. What would happen if I did so, anyway? Enishi traveling back to Kyoto and beating both of them up? Even I don't want that to happen! I just want to move on! I want to be happy again! I just hate that the memories and my new low self esteem keeps me up at night!
"I feel like only pathetic girls get cheated on," I laugh uneasily, "Or girls who weren't pretty or smart. But everyone tells me I am the complete package, and yet I still got cheated on. It's practically humiliating.."
"Cheating has nothing to do with you and everything to do with Kenshin's issues, Kaoru," He smiles as soon as my eyes flicker back at him in surprise, "He decided to do that on his own, with zero prompting from you. You could be the most perfect woman on the planet, and he would still cheat on you. He's just a dickbag, I'm afraid."
"Even if.. If I told you that it's because he is actually in love with other girl?"
"Well," He sighs, "If that's the case, then I suppose I do understand where you're coming from. That has got to hurt a lot. But even then, that still has nothing to do with you. Maybe the other girl is the one for him. But that doesn't mean you're inherently unlovable."
Inherently unlovable.
That's exactly it.
"I see.." I nod, "I guess it's just hard to divorce my feelings from all of this when you put it down so logically like that."
"I mean, I get it," He nods with a hum, "You were down bad for the guy for a long time, and you never thought he would have asked you out to be his girlfriend all just to leave you for someone else straight afterward. And you never would have guessed that he would go out of his way to actually lie or hurt you like this. It's a lot to take in, I think."
I gulp, ".. I don't know if I can ever forgive him for that."
"Why do you say that?"
I purse my lips, thinking. I finally reply, "I don't know. Really, I'm.. I'm more hurt that he would forgo our friendship over a person he's met just a few months ago than the cheating itself. If that makes sense."
"I think it does," He smiles, "I mean, I've known girls for years and they didn't exactly light my fire despite how fine they were as my friends, or as someone to go out with from time to time. I thought those feelings were normal. I thought it would never change. But then.. Then I met you, Kaoru. And all of a sudden, I am overcome with a feeling I have never felt before."
I gaze at him, moved by his words.
"When I met you, I finally realized, yes, this is how it's supposed to be! This is how liking someone should actually feel like!" He laughs, "I am so excited when you message me or when we get to spend time together, or whenever I get to hear your voice on the phone. I feel butterflies whenever you open the door of your house when I would come pick you up. I finally realize what passion truly means."
My smiles on my face falters and my eyes are overcome with fresh tears again, ".. Enishi. Thank you. I.. I really needed to hear all of that. I like you so much as well."
"I suppose maybe I'm rushing things too quickly, but," His hand that was on my hand this entire time tightens lovingly, ".. Kaoru.. would you be my girlfriend?"
"H-Huh?!" I blink rapidly at him, "Are you serious!"
"What!" He laughs, "Will you be my girlfriend, yes or no?"
I look at him, bewildered, but then I start to laugh. A small giggle at first, that turns into a cleansing of the soul type of laughter.
"Enishi.. Yes. Yes, I would love to be your girlfriend!" I smile at him broadly now.
"She said yes.." He says to himself at first, but then he starts standing up from the table and his voice gets louder and louder, "She said yes.. She said yes. She said yes! Hey everybody, she said YES!"
Everyone else in the restaurant look at him with a friendly disposition, and some even started clapping and cheering for us. I am absolutely red in the face from all of this, but my smile couldn't hide the truth: I'm happy that tonight happened. I'm happy that Enishi asked me to be his girlfriend. I'm happy that I'm far away from Kyoto, away from the bad memories, away from the past that no longer serves me.
Away from Kenshin and Soujiro and anything that reminds me of them.
"Bro, is that who I think it is?!" A new voice comes from behind me, and we both look towards a small group of people around our age pulling up to our table, "Hey, Enishi, how's it going?"
"Oh!" Enishi's eyes widen in recognition of the young man before him, "Ginji, it's you! I'm doing great, actually. I am on a date."
"Ooooh," This Ginji fellow peers at me and I shrink back into my chair shyly, "This one's cute. Don't break her heart, man!"
"Like I would ever! She just agreed to be my girlfriend." Enishi smiles smugly to himself.
I am quiet during all of this, blushing deeply.
"I'm so sorry," Another young man steps in to my view, "My name's Shōgo Amakusa, and we're usually not this boisterous. Please excuse my friend."
"And I'm Jurobei Anzai. This is my best friend, Toshizō Hijikata," Yet another young man with his friend comes forward to smile down at me with a friendly demeanor, "We're sorry if we interrupted your date!"
"Oh.. It's no problem," I smile awkwardly at them, putting my hands up, "Really, I'm glad you guys bumped into Enishi here. You all seem like great friends. Do you go to school together?"
"Yeah," Enishi answers my question, "We're thinking of applying to the same college together and start a STEM group of sorts."
"Us nerds better stick together." Jurobei crosses his arms and nods humbly with a smile, prompting his friend Toshizō to nod along with him in agreement. I can feel myself relaxing more now; they seem like such sweethearts.
Ginji points his thumb over his shoulder, "By the way, I got an old family friend who just came to town for a visit. He's still going to stick around for another week or so, and we were wondering if you'd like to show him more of the city when you get the chance."
"Oh?" My boyfriend blinks at him, "Who is he?"
All of a sudden, we hear a new voice coming in: "I'm sorry I took so long."
We all look up at this newcomer, a good looking male who's the same age as we are and sporting medium length, brown hair. He's dressed simply yet elegantly, and has a very pretty face for a boy. In just a split second of looking at him, I nearly gasp from where I sit, catching everyone's attention on me.
"You okay, Kaoru?" Enishi leans in to place his hand on my shoulder.
"Oh.. I'm sorry.." I chuckle nervously, "Your friend here just looks.. so familiar. He looks like someone I used to know."
This handsome guy looks at me on with unease at first, but he never the less reaches his hand out towards me for a handshake. With a reluctant smile, he says, "I'm sorry if I scared you, miss. Allow me to introduce myself: The name's Okita Souji."
(To be continued..)