Prompt: "I love you, you enormously stubborn pain in the ass." / 4x07 'All for One'
...
"Ow, ow. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow," Jane whined as she leaned against her car outside of her house. She and Maura had gone jogging and it was a pleasant experience until Jane had tripped less than a mile from home.
"Okay, why won't you just let me call for help?" Maura asked as she held up her phone.
"Because you will call 911, and they will send a fire engine and a surgical team for a sprained ankle," Jane replied. She clutched her leg tightly to her chest in an effort to keep her foot off of the ground. She had hobbled this far, but the pain had been too much for her to make it all the way back inside the house. "Just... just help me up."
"Okay. Come on." Maura grabbed Jane's hand and helped her stand.
"Thank you." Jane inhaled sharply, whimpered, and then leaned back against the car. "Okay, that's better."
"Please, let me drive you to the hospital."
"No. Maura, I'm fine." Jane grasped her leg even tighter.
"'Fine' is an adverb. It means 'pleasing or very well'. So, you're very well?"
"Yes." Maura touched Jane's ankle. "Ow! Stop it."
"I just want to examine it."
"Do not touch my ankle."
Maura held up her phone again. "You let me look at it or I speed-dial 911."
"I hate you." Jane held her foot out for Maura to examine.
"You love me. You just hate feeling vulnerable." Jane whimpered again as Maura began to poke and prod at her ankle. "Okay. Does this hurt?"
"Yes! Ow."
"Okay." Maura touched a different spot. "What about this?"
"Please stop touching it!" Jane quickly pulled her leg back into her chest and rocked back and forth.
"I suspect you have a partial tear in your anterior talofibular ligament."
"Otherwise known as a sprained ankle."
"You have to go see a doctor."
"I just did. Bill my insurance."
Maura sighed. She knew there was no arguing with Jane. "Can we at least go inside?"
"Yes." Jane tried to stand again. She grunted when her foot made contact with the ground.
Frankie approached as Jane was trying to make her way off of the car. "Oh, what did you do?"
"I sprained my ankle."
Frankie turned to Maura and said, "You know the only way to get her to a hospital is to knock her out, right?"
"Yeah, don't tempt me," Maura joked.
"Just... can you please just help me inside?" Jane asked as she leaned into Frankie for support.
"No, don't you dare," Maura said. "Not until you agree to let me X-ray it."
"It's not broken," Jane insisted.
"Knock her out," Maura instructed Frankie.
Frankie made a motion like he was going to punch her and Jane reeled back. "Wait, no!" She exclaimed. "Okay, okay."
Maura was satisfied now that she had finally convinced Jane to do something. "Okay, let's go."
Jane put one arm around Frankie and the other around Maura and her brother and her fiancé helped her hobble her way inside.
...
Maura and Jane were down in the morgue x-raying her foot. Jane was atop one of the autopsy tables and the x-ray was pointed at her ankle.
"No break in the fibula or tibia," Maura stated as she read the x-ray results off the monitor.
"So, I'm fine."
"Oh, look!" Maura said as Susie walked in carrying a black boot. "Senior Criminalist Chang went to the store and bought you a new shoe."
"Size 9, right?" Susie asked. Maura nodded in response.
"No. No way," Jane said.
"Yes. Yes way. Susie, can you please hold down Detective Rizzoli so we can put the protective boot on her?"
Susie wasn't sure what to say. "O-okay."
Jane was annoyed with Maura and her jokes. "Give me that." She grabbed the boot and Susie quickly exited the room. "I'll do it myself." Jane moved to put the boot on, but the second it touched her foot, she tensed up. "No, it hurts. It hurts. It hurts."
"All right. Let me do it." Maura took the boot out of Jane's hand and began to put it on her fiancé. Jane clenched her fists and winced in pain. "You really do need to see a doctor."
"Maura!" Jane whined and she laid back on the autopsy table in both pain and annoyance.
"I'm just trying to take care of you."
"That is very sweet but I do not need to pay an expensive medical bill right now." Jane's voice was laced with pain as Maura fiddled with the boot.
"You do realize that we are engaged? I can help you."
"You are helping me. You have x-rayed my ankle and you got me this boot."
"Fine. But if you end up limping down the aisle, do not say that I didn't warn you." Maura finished adjusting the straps. "There. You're all set."
Jane sat back up. "Okay. All right." She moved to get off of the table, but banged her ankle on the edge instead. "Ohh-ohh, ow!"
"Okay, how are you gonna get upstairs?"
"Well, does Senior Criminalist Chang have crutches?"
"I'm telling you, it's probably torn."
"Can you please just give me some crutches?!"
Maura rolled her eyes at Jane's frustration and stubbornness. Then she headed towards the door to retrieve some crutches for her fiancé. Jane moved to follow her, but the second her foot touched the floor she was crying from pain again. "I'm just gonna wait here," Jane said as she hopped back up on the table.
"You are lucky that I love you, you enormously stubborn pain in the ass," Maura said as she made her through the door and began her search for crutches.