Chapter Two – I Don't Trust You

Darkness surrounded him.

It was the kind of darkness where he couldn't see anything, not even a beetle flying past his nose. It made his fur stand on end. The wolf bared his teeth. It was so dark, he had no idea if his eyes were open or closed.

The wolf raised up his nose, taking in the scents, but all he could smell was fear. The scent overwhelmed him. It seeped into his skin, clung onto his fur. It was all he could sense, all he could feel. It rooted the wolf to the ground. With his legs shaking and his tail between his legs, the wolf whined. He'd never felt such fear. He'd never given into fear. He was what prey feared. He did not know what to do with this new emotion. The wolf's body shook. With his ears flat against his head, he let out another soft whine, hoping someone would hear him and pull him out of this strange darkness.

"Don't be afraid, little wolfie," a voice whispered in his ear.

The wolf turned his head, trying to find the source of the voice. It was too dark to see anything, too dark to feel anything.

"Just open your eyes… I promise, it will only hurt a little."

The wolf whined again, his body shaking harder. Cold fear traveled through his body. This voice promised pain. He did not want to hurt anymore. He was tired of this cruel existence, a never-ending cycle of pain and fear. He wanted peace, but something as pure, simple and innocent as that was not deserved. This voice only gave him the opposite, it made him believe that darkness, fear and pain was what a wretched creature like him should only expect.

The wolf stood there for hours, trembling, braced for pain. Braced for the cruel voice to make him believe how wretched a creature he was. And then something in him made him open his eyes and look up. The wolf had no idea what compelled him to do it, to raise his head out of the darkness, to embrace the fear as if someone else were with him, whispering words of love and encouragement. He could almost feel soft hands petting him through his fur. When he opened his amber eyes, he saw something that almost made him cry out in longing. A white twinkling star. He couldn't remember its given name, only that it was known as the dog star.

It was twinkling so unusually bright, giving him a path of light. The wolf could see it through a small window above his head, and right next to it was the glowing white full-moon. Its power radiating, calling him, promising the call of the wild to him. Howls echoed in his head, bringing forth an instinct to run and chase and hunt. The sounds of his pack began to wash away his fear. This had once meant something to him, but he couldn't remember why. The memory would not come to him. It was lost in the trundles of darkness that wove around every inch of his body, seeping into his heart, taking hold of him.

"About time you've stopped dreaming," the voice growled again in his ear, and with that, the light vanished. The darkness engulfed the wolf. He turned his head and his amber eyes connected to icy-blue eyes that had a red tint to them.

The wolf looked directly at those cold eyes, unable to look away. Fear like he had never known swept through him once more.

"You killed me," she whispered. "You're nothing but a monster. You killed me! You killed children! You killed ME! You promised! You need to be punished!" she hissed, her blue eyes still connected to his own.

It was an accident! The wolf thought. He tried to say those words, but they couldn't come out. They were stuck in his throat. All that came out was a whimper, followed by a low whine. Shame washed over him.

"You killed me!" the voice hissed again, and this time the light of the moon shone on the owner of the icy-blue eyes and cold voice. And he could see the pale face of a young girl with auburn hair.

"You promised, Remus, you promised to take me with you!"

I'm sorry! I tried!

The wolf tried to run, but his paws were glued to the ground. Blood began to drip onto her face. Her blue eyes were so pale, he could barely see her irises.

The wolf struggled some more, fought with everything he had, and then out of the terrifying darkness, came a name that made his heart constrict in pain. A name that made his chest feel so heavy and tight, he could hardly hold himself up. The darkness released a bit of its hold on the wolf, giving him a memory of a young girl. The memory flashed through his mind, quick and painful. A vibrant young girl full of determination, bravery and suffering. Then followed by the scents of blood and death, screams full of fear as they changed into the howls of a young she-wolf.

And the wolf knew she was right.

He did not deserve anything but punishment, because what he'd done was unforgivable. He was responsible for her death. He had killed her and he could barely remember her name! The wolf bowed his head in submission and regret, waiting for his deserved punishment.

"I'm sorry..." The wolf tried to say. "Kaylie… I'm…"

Suddenly, there was a loud howl, a howl he'd never heard before. The silhouette of another wolf was the last thing the wolf saw before closing his eyes tight, bracing himself for pain. Suddenly, the trundles began to release him, slithering back into the shadows. The girl growled and faded away.

Wake up!

The wolf snapped opened his eyes.

Remus found himself drenched in sweat. His blankets and sheets were twisted around him. He could barely make out his room in the grey morning. Fear and guilt made his beating heart ache. He wondered if it were possible to start taking Dreamless Sleep Potions, because going to bed drunk on wine clearly hadn't stopped the nightmares. He couldn't go on like this. The nightmares were growing worse each night and he was losing sleep. Anxiety began to fill his entire body and he couldn't stop shaking. That girl was still on his mind. Even though in the dream he could barely remember her name, he remembered it clearly now. The name left a bitter taste in his mouth.

Kaylie… And she's right….

It was his fault she'd lost her life. He'd killed her. Remus did not deserve to live while that young girl was buried underneath the ground. He felt like the monster she had claimed him to be in his dream. Remus had promised her and he had failed her. And he failed Jonathan Porter. Remus hated feeling so low of himself, but how could he not? When every night he relived his darkest memories.

Every night Remus was reminded of Greyback, reminded of Kaylie's death. It was hard to forget, especially when the brand of Werewolf: Classified Dark Creature was burned into his skin forever. How could he move on? How could he forget and live and be happy? And he was falling, falling so far down that Remus was sure no one would be able to pull him back up.

Remus closed his eyes and stayed in bed for a few moments more, trying to find the will to get up. He had to start the day, but how could he teach his students? Knowing deep down inside that he was a monster, that he'd killed children their own age. What would they even think of him if they knew?

Remus snuggled deeper into his blankets, trying to push all the fear of his nightmares away, trying to push his anxiety and pain away. Trying not to give into his sudden desire to suddenly just get up and pick up a half-empty wine bottle that he knew was still sitting on his coffee table. The only thing that could numb everything, so Remus couldn't feel anymore. He had left it there last night, after Severus had left his quarters. He was afraid to fall asleep last night, the only solution he could think of. The darkness that was creeping into him, settling around his heart, it was so heavy, he wasn't sure if he was strong enough to carry it through the day.

Remus ran his hands over his face with a deep sigh. He had to stop thinking like that, he had to for his students and for Harry. They were all counting on him. And so, Remus forced himself out of bed and into the shower. When he left his quarters, he didn't dare chance a glance at the wine bottle.

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An hour or so later, Remus found himself at the Great Hall for breakfast. His cane was propped up against the table. He had only brought it to keep Poppy and Severus off his back about it. He was nursing a cup of strong hot coffee mixed with cream and sugar, hoping it would take away his anxiety and up his mood a bit. Remus was feeling sleep deprived and depressed from his nightmare. So lost in his thoughts, Remus did not notice Severus' arrival until the dark-haired wizard in his black flowing robes sat next to him and poured himself a cup of coffee as well, taking it black. His dark eyes spotted the cane with silent approval.

"Is it wise to sit so close to me in front of your Slytherins?" Remus asked in a very low murmur, still looking down at his coffee, keeping his eyes averted. He didn't want Severus to see the bags under his eyes or the haunted look in them. He did not want the Potions Master to worry about him.

"Let them see," Severus shrugged. "We are merely two professors of this school sitting alongside each other during breakfast, discussing lesson plans and nasty term papers."

Remus took another sip of his coffee, not feeling up to chuckling at Severus' small and rare joke.

Severus waited for a reaction with a furrowed brow of concern, when Remus didn't say anything more, Severus began to pile some eggs onto his plate. "You look like you've had better mornings, Lupin," he only commented.

Remus could feel Severus' eyes scanning over him, taking in the deep bags under his eyes, his pale face, and he could probably feel Remus' low spirit. Severus was intuitive, always able to read people's energies, Remus was sure he was picking it all up from him… Noticing the untouched plate of eggs and toast in front of him. Thinking about food was making Remus feel sick. He just needed coffee.

Remus only sighed and sipped his coffee, thankfully catching sight of Harry arriving at the Great Hall. His cub looked like he was in a foul mood with his two best friends, Ron and Hermione. They were arguing on each side of him. That reminded Remus of how Sirius and James used to argue with him like that in the middle.

"Harry doesn't seem happy…" Remus commented, hoping his observation would distract Severus from asking him if he was okay… Remus wasn't sure how he would even be able to answer that. It was the last thing he needed… To lie and say he was okay when in truth he was just falling and falling and falling under the heaviness of his heart.

Severus scowled, glancing at his son before drinking his coffee. "Well, he better change that attitude. I will not have him acting like a brat in my class today."

"You cannot let this argument come between you and Harry, Severus. You should talk to him."

"And what do you suggest?" Severus slammed down his mug in irritation. "I tried talking to him. He is just so stubborn like his mother! I used to believe that child was completely like his father, I was wrong! Sometimes he acts like a carbon copy of Lily Evans!"

"And isn't that a good thing? You grew up with Lily, you knew her way before I or my friends did. You were used to her stubbornness. I'm certain you can handle her son's stubbornness as well."

"It's much more complicated than that, Remus. I know I compare Harry a lot to his parents. He may seem exactly like his mother, but he is also his own person. If it were Lily in this situation, she might've listened to me, unlike Harry… I know he can't trust adults. He can't trust Dumbledore to handle this situation."

"Still, try to talk to him. Harry needs to know if he can't trust Dumbledore, then he can trust you."

Severus' demeanor seemed to deflate at Remus' advice. "That's the problem…" he sighed. "Harry says he does, but deep down…I don't think he…" Severus trailed off, then downed the rest of his coffee, then said in a harsher tone, "If Harry really trusted me, then he wouldn't be so angry at me right now!" Severus stood up. "I have to leave, I have potions that are simmering."

Remus only nodded. He wasn't in the mood to make Severus stay to talk some more. He was glad the Potions Master was leaving, in fact. Remus really just wanted to be left alone to get his thoughts together before class.

He sipped his coffee, noticing Severus still lingering, frowning down at him.

"Don't think I don't know what you're trying to do, Remus..." he whispered.

Remus blushed, knowing what Severus meant behind those words.

"You look really tired," Severus murmured so softly, that only a person with werewolf hearing could pick up.

Remus averted his eyes away. He wanted to tell Severus about his nightmares, he wanted to take down his mental barriers and let him in. He wanted to show Severus how much of a mess he was inside. He so much wanted to tell him, but he couldn't.

Remus thought about the kisses they had shared, the spark he was quite sure he'd felt, and he knew he couldn't deny his feelings for Severus forever. But how could he open up to someone, perhaps even fall in love with someone, when Remus could barely look at himself? He was a mess, and Severus deserved better. Remus knew in his heart he wasn't ready, especially not after the disastrous ending of he and Sirius.

"Remus?"

Remus kept his eyes on his coffee. He just couldn't look at Severus and pretend he was okay. He was falling… It was so heavy… The darkness….

"Have tea with me tonight?"

He should say no. Remus knew he should push Severus away. It wasn't safe to start anything right now. Remus was too broken, too dangerous. It wouldn't be right, yet he couldn't shut out the tiny voice in his head: But what if you said yes, what if you did let him in? And his heart leaped at the thought of saying yes and having tea with Severus, to be alone in his company for a few hours.

And that's all it could be, nothing else, Remus bargained with himself.

Remus slowly met Severus' warm gaze and he couldn't help but nod once at the invitation, despite the tirade of reasons why he should say no going on in his head.

Severus' gaze was so intense, causing Remus to blush again. And now Remus knew Severus had sensed his negative energy this morning. Remus was sure he could see the depression in his eyes. He could tell Severus wanted to say something, but was holding back since it was too risky in the Great Hall.

The warm intensity of those dark eyes suddenly stopped Remus from feeling like he was falling from the heavy weight in his heart. It anchored him for just a moment, it lifted the heaviness just an inch, allowing Remus to finally be able to breathe. And he found himself suddenly wanting Severus to stay, he wanted to continue feeling that warmth, that spark between them, but he couldn't say anything to make Severus stay.

He just sat there, hating the coward he was, staring down at his coffee as Severus walked away, taking all the warmth with him… And then Remus was falling once more…suffocating under the heavy darkness….

Harry's day could not have started off any worse than it already had. He was hurt and upset that Ron and Hermione didn't believe him about Draco. They were doubtful and did not seem to care enough that Draco might be a Death Eater. Voldemort had his hold on the Slytherin, pulling him deeper into the dark arts and Harry knew the evidence was on Draco's forearm.

Ron and Hermione both agreed that if Harry were right, then it just meant Draco getting what he wanted. Harry couldn't agree with them. He knew Draco... Draco wanted to play Quidditch professionally after Hogwarts or become a healer. He wanted nothing to do with the dark arts.

Harry thought Ron and Hermione had gotten over their anger towards Draco. Yeah, he knew the Slytherin had been shitty to them in the past, but he'd changed. Draco wasn't like that anymore. It was never the real Draco. Harry knew the real Draco deep down inside, hiding behind that prickly interior of a mask. He was just a kid like Harry, screaming for help, surrounded by people who couldn't understand him and the situation he was trapped in. It was something Harry had gone through himself after Sirius died, and if it wasn't for Severus to pull him out, Harry had no idea what would've happened to him at the Dursleys.

And speaking of Severus, Harry was still mad at him. The Potions Professor refused to listen to him last night, treating him like a child. It was so frustrating. He was dreading the evening when the time came for the talk Severus had promised him.

"Harry?"

Harry turned his head to the voice calling his name, his mind still cloudy with his thoughts.

"Isn't it risky to have Lupin come back to Hogwarts?" Hermione huffed in annoyance.

Harry looked at Ron. What is she on about this time? he thought, as Ron caught his eye, sighing in exasperation.

"I'm just saying, everyone, parents, the Ministry, school board officials, all know that Remus is a werewolf. I wonder how Dumbledore was able to pull this off. Any little complaint against Remus and the school board can make Dumbledore fire him. Anything can go wrong."

"Ahhh, Hermione, you worry too much. I'm sure Dumbledore has gotten everything taken care of. He won't let Lupin get chucked out of Hogwarts!" Ron said.

"Yes, but you're not seeing the bigger picture here, Ronald!" Hermione stepped in front of them, so they were both forced to stop in their tracks.

"Professor Dumbledore might be able to handle the angry responses from parents, but it won't stop them from pulling their kids out of school. He doesn't have full power over Hogwarts. If the parents and school board want him out, then he is out! Werewolves are not taken lightly. It's only a matter of time before someone starts to say something about Remus being too close to teenagers. And especially after what happened to him this summer, he is still in danger from Death Eaters, werewolves and You-Know-Who. He needs to lay low, the Prophet is no doubt going to be all over this as soon as word gets out that Remus is teaching again. Professor Dumbledore won't be able to protect him from that, and one more thing!" she said, stopping Ron from interrupting her during her tirade.

"Think about it, guys, Remus has the Dark Arts post again. Last I heard, that teaching post is still cursed, which means…"

"He'll only be here for one year…" Harry realized. It dawned on him that something terrible was going to happen at the end of the year to make Remus leave, just like in his third year, and his heart felt heavy at the thought. Remus belonged here. Teaching was his element, and it wasn't fair that Remus might be out of a job at the end of the school year because of this bloody curse.

"I would bet on anything that something is going to happen to make Remus leave again," Harry finished, finally understanding why Hermione was so worried. He looked at Ron who realized it too. His ears were red with worry for their favorite teacher.

"Blimey, Harry," Ron said. "Lupin has taken the post before. He's the only one who has ever come back… Maybe he broke the curse? I mean, no one's ever come back."

Harry shook his head feeling worried and helpless. He knew nothing he could ever say to Dumbledore, Severus or even Remus, would convince Remus to resign. It wouldn't change anything, and there was no going back. They just had to watch out for their favorite teacher so he wouldn't fall victim to the curse again.

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Defense Against the Dark Arts was always Harry's favorite class, and a lesson with Remus Lupin as the professor was always so fun and brilliant. Remus was a natural teacher. A teacher who loved his subject and cared deeply for his students. He'd definitely forgotten how great Remus' classes were.

Remus had ended the lesson and the three Gryffindors, along with their classmates, were packing up their things, getting ready to go to their next lesson of the day. For Harry, Ron and Hermione, it was Potions. Harry's stomach was a jumble of nerves. Severus was acting so much like his old self last night. Would he regain the role during class again? Harry couldn't stand Severus acting like that again to him, as if nothing ever happened. He knew it was supposed to be an act, but it was just so real, it brought back too many past emotions… Not to mention the argument they'd gotten into.

"Harry, may I speak with you for a moment?"

Harry looked up to see Remus standing in front of his desk. Harry hadn't noticed Remus approaching him. He was using his cane to lean on, during class he had left it leaning on his desk, but now that the lesson was over, Harry guessed his injury was really bothering him now.

"We'll wait for you outside, Harry," Hermione said. Remus nodded his thanks to her, and they silently watched Harry's friends leave the classroom along with the last of the students.

"Will it take long? I have Potions next," Harry said.

"It won't take long. I certainly won't make you late to Severus' first Potions class of the school term." The werewolf gave him a small smile, a mischievous gleam in his hazel eyes that Harry hadn't seen since Sirius died.

"Yeah, you wouldn't want to be the subject of his murderous glare," Harry mocked.

"No, I wouldn't fancy that," Remus chuckled. "I just wanted to ask you if you were okay. I've noticed you haven't been in the best of moods lately."

Harry shrugged, not liking where this conversation was going. Remembering how Remus tried speaking to him last night, and how Harry was too triggered to speak to him from the argument Harry had with Severus and the Slytherins making fun of him for Draco punching him in the nose.

"Everything is fine," Harry mumbled.

Harry didn't want to talk about his argument with Severus last night. It hurt too much to think that Severus couldn't listen to him, treating him like a child. It was unfair! He so much wanted to help Draco. Then he realized, if Severus couldn't listen, then maybe Remus would. He decided to ask the werewolf, hope filling his chest at the thought of Remus helping him.

Harry looked up at the werewolf, who waited patiently for Harry to confide in him.

"It's Draco… Severus won't listen to me. I think he's in danger. I think Voldemort might have recruited him as a Death Eater. I told Severus that we must help him get away from Voldemort and his family, but Severus wants to just leave things to Dumbledore. I don't trust Dumbledore is going to do anything. Draco needs help right now! I can see it in Draco, he is stressed and miserable, he needs our help! And, Severus won't listen!"

Remus frowned, deep in thought as he considered Harry's words. He suddenly looked to Harry older than his years, his hair with graying stands and dark circles under his eyes. Harry noticed how his robes hung onto his shoulders. And he realized how tired the werewolf looked, instantly feeling bad for burdening Remus with his worries for Draco. Maybe he was wrong to think Remus could help him with Draco.

"Harry…" Remus sighed, and Harry knew exactly what his answer was going to be. He'd noticed how friendly Remus and Severus were suddenly becoming towards each other. Harry could bet his Firebolt Severus had already talked to Remus about it, winning the werewolf's side before Harry even had a chance.

That slimy git!

"You're on his side! Aren't you?!" Harry shouted, stepping away in disgust, anger and betrayal.

"No, Harry, I'm taking no one's side! Listen, I understand why you might suspect Draco is a Death Eater, this is a delicate situation. You must leave this to Dumbledore. I'm sure Severus has not taken your words as lightly as you think. You must trust them!"

Trust them? As in trusting adults? Like how I was supposed to trust the Dursleys? No way! Harry thought in disgust. This is bloody ridiculous! Does anyone in this school even care?!

"We can't just let him suffer!" Harry shouted, he was beyond frustrated. Thankfully they were alone in the classroom. "He is trapped with them!"

"Severus is watching Draco, there is no need to act dramatically, Harry. Severus is doing the best he can and so is Dumbledore. Trust them! I won't say it again!" Remus growled, his eyes flashing.

Harry scowled in disgust. "I don't know why I even bothered!" He threw his back-pack over his shoulder.

"Harry!"

Harry ignored Remus, storming out of the classroom with anger filling his chest. Why wouldn't anyone listen? He had no one else to confide in…but fine… If they weren't going to listen then Harry would have to find Draco himself and talk to him. He wasn't going to let Draco go until he forced the truth out of him. Even though they were forced to pretend to be enemies, it did not mean they really had to be. Draco was still his friend, even if he had broken his nose unnecessarily on the train yesterday. Harry still wasn't going to let Draco fall into darkness.

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It wasn't until Potions class did Harry finally see Draco. He hadn't shown up for breakfast or Defense or History of Magic. The blonde Slytherin looked pale and stressed with dark bags under his eyes. His hair was mused up as if he'd been running his hands through it all morning. That was all the proof Harry needed that something was indeed wrong.

Harry decided to try and get him alone after class. It wasn't wise to try and talk to Draco with Severus breathing down his neck, so he opened his Potions book and began to follow the instructions on how to brew a Draught of Living Death Potion.

It was then that he noticed the cramped handwriting in the margins. Some of the book's instructions were crossed out, and advice was given instead on how to brew. Harry wondered what student might have done this to his book, then instantly remembered why his newly bought textbook had writing all over it. This was not his textbook, this was the Potions book he found in Severus' classroom. He took it because he wanted to find out who the Half-Blood Prince was. However, he hadn't meant to take this book to class with him, grabbing it instead of his own by accident in his haste to talk to Ron and Hermione about Draco this morning.

Harry studied the instructions once more, wondering if he should just follow the book's or the owner of the crammed and spiky handwriting that looked oddly familiar, yet he couldn't figure out why.

Deciding it couldn't hurt to follow the mysterious writing, since half the book's instructions were unreadable anyway, Harry began to follow the written instructions, praying his potion would turn out okay and not explode.

The potion turned out to be very difficult. Hermione was having a hard time, her hair getting frizzier each minute. Ron's potion was a dark, murky color as he stirred, trying to make it right. Harry looked around to see Draco working on his potions with Severus suggesting advice to him. The Potions Master looked up and caught Harry's eye, before making his way towards him. Harry swiftly pushed Ron's book on top of his own, hiding the Half-Blood Prince's book. He was sure Severus wouldn't approve of it.

"That vile liquid you call a potion is unsalvageable, Weasley!"

The professor waved his wand over Ron's cauldron, emptying it of its failed contents. Ron's ears grew red as he held in all his insults at the Potions Master. Ernie Macmillan's potion looked way worse than Ron's! Severus glanced at Hermione's potion and smirked at the dark color, not even bothering to help her. Harry scowled, he hated it when Severus treated his friends like crap.

Harry braced himself as Severus studied his potion with a furrowed brow, observing the color that was turning a pale lilac shade. He didn't look at Harry as he muttered with confusion in his voice, "See me after class…" And he moved on to the next table.

Harry let out a deep breath, still feeling Severus' suspicious glare at the back of his neck as he continued stirring, and Hermione's own suspicious look. Of course, she noticed Harry's potion coming out remarkably well, and the fact that he hid his textbook from Severus.

Tired of Hermione's glare, Harry finished up his potion, and said, "Yes, Hermione?"

"How did you get your potion that color? How are you doing it? Professor Snape didn't even criticize you!"

"I guess I just got lucky," Harry shrugged.

"I don't believe that! Let me see your book," she whispered furiously, adding a few more ingredients and stirring carefully, trying in vain to get her potion the exact same shade as Harry's.

The bell rang. Harry was relieved. Making sure no one was watching, he shrunk the Half-Blood Prince's book and hid it in his bag. "Ron, can I borrow your Potions book?"

"Sure, mate," Ron shrugged, not really paying attention as he cursed out Severus to Hermione and Ernie Macmillan.

He could still feel Hermione seething with anger as he made his way to Severus' desk as the rest of the students filed out of the classroom. Whatever Severus wanted, this better be quick. He hoped to catch up to Draco after class.

"Those extra lessons during the summer helped wonders, I see. Your skills have improved immensely in such a short amount of time… Some would probably agree with me that your perfect brew should be quite impossible, extra lessons or not…" Severus drawled, as he examined the phials of the students' potions. Harry's was the only one that had the pale lilac color.

"Is that all you wanted to say?" Harry asked, he really had to go.

Severus put the phial down, his eyes traveling briefly to Ron's textbook Harry was holding in his hand.

"Despite our argument yesterday, I just wanted to say that I'm here if you need anything. Just because we argue doesn't mean I don't love you any less."

Harry nodded.

"Is there anything you want to tell me?"

Harry looked at him, wondering if he knew about the Half-Blood Prince's book. Harry wondered if he should tell him about it, maybe Severus could help him find out who it was, but something in him told him that maybe it wasn't a good idea. Harry had no idea why, but he wanted to keep the Half-Blood Prince a secret for now.

"Answer me, Potter."

"No, sir, I have nothing to say," Harry said.

Severus considered Harry for a moment, before saying, "I want to remind you to come to our quarters tonight after dinner. We must discuss what happened last night."

"Yes, sir," Harry replied, only so that Severus would dismiss him. He really needed to find Draco. He didn't want to hear what Severus had to say at the moment. He was still angry at him and hurt that Severus wouldn't help him with Draco or even listen.

"If you have nothing to say, then you're dismissed," Severus said, his attention going back to the phials of failed potions.

Harry left the dungeons before Severus could call him back.

Since Potions was the last lesson for the day, instead of going back to Gryffindor tower, Harry hid in a small alcove near the Slytherin dungeon, waiting for Draco to appear. As he waited, he examined the Half-Blood Prince's Advanced Potion-Making book. The handwriting itself was strange, yet familiar. He flipped it to the front cover page, and in the small cramped handwriting, it read property of the Half-Blood Prince.

Who is the Half-Blood Prince? Can this person be anyone I might know?

The writing was just so familiar. He racked his brain, trying to remember where he'd seen it.

It wasn't long until Harry heard Draco's voice. He quickly put the book away, then peeked out of the alcove, catching a glimpse of Draco walking down the hall with his usual group of Slytherins by his side.

Shit! He isn't alone!

Harry never thought about the possibility of Draco not being alone. He had no plan on how to get his attention, and so he watched with disappointment, as Draco disappeared behind the portrait. He thought about waiting some more, but realized that could take hours before Draco came out for dinner. And he would still be with his group of friends. He would have to find another way to catch him alone, so with a heavy heart full of disappointment, Harry made his way back to Gryffindor tower.

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That evening, before dinner, was spent doing homework. Harry couldn't understand how he got a pile of homework on their first day, and was trying not to get distracted by Ginny who was doing her own homework a few tables away with a group of fifth years. Every now and then they would make eye-contact, then look away, both blushing.

And just when Harry was summoning up the courage to just join Ginny at her table, he was interrupted… "Harry, I have a note for you!" Harry looked up to see Jack Sloper coming towards him handing him a roll of parchment.

Curious, Harry took it, and when Sloper left, he opened the note. He was greeted with slant handwriting that was no other than Dumbledore's, telling him to come to his office on Saturday at 8:00pm and that he enjoys acid pops. Harry wondered what this was about, and if Severus knew anything about it. Then he remembered he was still angry at him.

"Dumbledore wants me to see him on Saturday at eight," Harry said to Ron and Hermione. His two friends both looked over his shoulder, discussing the possibilities of what was waiting in store for Harry.

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After dinner, Harry found himself walking to Severus' quarters, wishing he was at Gryffindor tower. He really did not want to have this conversation with his dad. What was said, was said, and no talk was going to change it. Severus already made it clear that he was leaving the Draco problem up to Dumbledore. Harry decided on Saturday he was going to ask Dumbledore what his plans were for helping Draco. He was not going to let his friend become a Death Eater.

Once he got there, Harry knocked on the portrait door, mentally bracing himself and trying to calm his nervous stomach.

The portrait door opened, Harry stepped inside to see Severus brewing some hot tea in the kitchen. Seeing that brought Harry back to the summer, where everything was easy and okay between them, before this one argument tore them apart again. He hated fighting with Severus. He missed his dad. He so much wanted to tell him about his first day at Hogwarts, about his mysterious Potions book, his argument with Remus, and how worried he was about the DADA curse. He wanted to tell him everything, but the hurt in him kept him from doing just that. It left him cold, angry and closed up as he stood in the living room, waiting for Severus to invite him to sit down.

"You can make yourself comfortable, Harry, this is still your home no matter how angry you are with me."

Harry rolled his eyes as he chose his favorite spot on the sofa.

Severus handed him a hot cup of steaming tea before sitting down in his armchair.

"Before we get into things, do you want to tell me how your first day went?"

Harry shook his head, still sulking about last night's argument. He wasn't going to pretend like nothing happened, like they weren't in the middle of an argument.

"Harry…"

"I have nothing to say to you!" he said, feeling beyond irritated, it made him say things he did not mean.

"Stop being disrespectful!" Severus snapped.

Harry glared at the Potions Master. "Fine! I'll keep my mouth shut, then!"

Severus ran a hand through his hair, looking as if he was trying very hard to be patient. "Bloody teenager," he muttered as he drank some of his tea.

"Look, Harry, I don't want to argue with you anymore. I want you to understand that I have taken your accusations of Draco being a Death Eater into account. Professor Dumbledore has me watching him. I will let you know if anything happens to him."

"So, you're just going to watch him?" Harry said. "Let him be a sitting duck for Voldemort and his Death Eaters? We have to talk to him!"

"No, we cannot. We must not let him know what you are accusing him of. Dumbledore has a plan, and you must trust him, if not, then trust me!"

Harry did not say anything. That was where the problem was. He couldn't trust adults yet. He couldn't fully trust Severus as much as he wanted to… Not with this, not with something this important, not when Draco's life was on the line.

"I can't trust you…" Harry whispered before he could stop himself. Now, Severus knew Harry had lied to him about trusting him at the beach….

It was quiet, so quiet, Harry couldn't stand it. He kept his gaze on his shoes, ashamed to look at Severus. He had not meant for those words to come out. But they did and they were heard, and now Severus was most likely hurt by them.

"I understand your anger. I know you're worried for Draco, I understand why you cannot fully trust me right now…"

Harry shook his head, "I'm sorry... I don't want to fight anymore," he said, feeling bad for what he said, for how disrespectful he'd been acting towards Severus.

"Harry..."

Harry shook his head, he wanted so much to turn to Severus and confide in him, but he couldn't. He was afraid. He couldn't fully trust him still even after everything they've been through this summer. It was something that Harry would always struggle with, thanks to his aunt and uncle who raised him with only fear and pain.

"I will handle this situation with Draco."

"But why did you treat me like a child last night? You wouldn't listen to me!"

"I just… I apologize. My excuse is that I'm tired of seeing you hurt, seeing you get into these unnecessary, dangerous situations. I wanted to protect you. I want you to stay a teenager a little longer. That is why I brushed you away last night, and I deeply apologize. I hope you learn to trust me one day. Remember everything that I say or do is in your best interest, even if it seems like it isn't. Remember you are my son now, we are family, and I love you very much. Even when it seems like everything is falling apart, remember that, please, trust me."

Harry nodded, wondering why Severus' words sounded as if he were foreshadowing something, but Harry decided not to ask. Maybe it meant nothing.

"Are we ok, now?"

Harry looked at his newly adoptive father. He could see that Severus was holding back. What was he hiding? This was why he couldn't fully trust him. Severus still had secrets. Despite him being his new dad, despite his words, Harry still couldn't fully trust him. If Severus was going to hold secrets, then so be it. Harry was going to keep secrets too. Out of spite, he decided to keep the Half-Blood Prince a secret and he decided to not tell Severus about Dumbledore's note or even his own plan to talk to Draco.

"I'll try..." His heart hurt for lying. He felt so bad, but Severus was the one who started it. "I know I've been acting like a git lately… I'm just scared for Draco."

"Don't be afraid, he is my godson. I won't let him fall," Severus said softly.

"You should adopt him," Harry said, "He can come home with us for the holidays, that way he can be away from Voldemort and be safe with us."

"That isn't as easy as it sounds, Narcissa will never allow it."

"She will if it protects her only son!"

Severus looked as if he were going to argue, but decided to take into consideration what Harry was saying. "I'll talk to her. Maybe she might let him stay with us during the holidays to keep him safe."

Harry smiled a bit. "That makes me feel better."

"Just don't say anything to anyone yet. We don't know what's going to happen. I promise you, I am keeping an eye out for Draco."

"Okay…"

"One more thing, Harry."

"Yes?"

"You're having issues with my acting? You don't like it when I pretend I still hate you?"

Harry nodded. "It's too hard. It messes with my emotions. Can we figure something else out?"

"What do you suggest?"

"How about you give me a safe word, letting me know that you're just acting, that you don't really mean anything you're saying? I know it sounds childish, but it reminds me too much of my uncle and when you used to hate me. It traps me in the past. I need a que to remind me that it isn't real anymore," Harry shrugged, his cheeks burning with embarrassment.

"Don't be ashamed, Harry, I understand perfectly."

"You do?" Harry looked at him in surprise, his anger at his dad seeping away. He really did miss talking to him.

Severus nodded. "Any suggestions?"

Harry shrugged. "A wink, maybe?"

"I can do that."

Harry shrugged, still feeling embarrassed for acting like a scared child.

Severus leant over to him. "Hey, look at me, kid."

Harry slowly looked up at his guardian, his emotions turning from anger and hurt, to guilty and sad. He was so tired, he just wanted to go to bed.

"I'm tired, Sev, can we finish this talk up later? I'm not mad at you anymore, okay? I just want to go to bed."

Severus looked as if he wanted to say more, but held back. Harry wished Severus hadn't. Despite his spiteful anger, a small part of Harry still wanted to confide in him about his plan to talk to Draco and about the Half-Blood Prince, he just needed Severus to push him to do it.

"If that is your wish, we can continue tomorrow," Severus answered. "You should be getting to bed, you have lessons tomorrow."

Harry stood up and Severus followed him to the portrait door.

"Hey, give me a hug, kid," Severus said.

Harry hugged his dad goodnight.

There was so much more he wanted to say to him, but he couldn't open up. There was so much that Severus was holding back. Harry could see it in him. How did this happen? The last day of summer break was so fun as they bonded. It was full of promises and excitement for the future, and now there was a rift between them, keeping them apart with unspoken words and mistrust.

That sense Harry had of Severus hiding something from him was growing stronger and he couldn't shake it off. Harry left Severus' quarters, almost wishing that he had asked to spend the night in his bedroom, but it just seemed so childish that he resolutely made his way to Gryffindor tower, his mind racing on this evening's talk and his heart aching for the summer that passed and the guilt he had for lying about his trust to his dad.

A/N: I hope you enjoyed my story and I apologize for the long wait. Thank you mamacasper06, carriemarie78, aixxx, zooyork81879, Guest, and elisabella442001 for your reviews!