This story now updates on Archive of Our Own only.

My username and the story title are the same over there. The story is NOT locked to users only so can be viewed without needing an AO3 account. There are more chapters posted there already as well.

Sorry to anyone who is disappointed by this :( but posting here has become quite draining (variety of reasons) and I hope that if you have been enjoying this story you'll check it out over there!

The Fifth Month

Sora and Riku were forced into confronting the fear of separation they had developed over the past four months as Riku began being summoned for missions again.

Riku spent most of his time away worried that the painful misery was about to envelop Sora and he wouldn't be there to stay by his side through it. With the frequency and intensity of Sora's heart pains still the same, these played on his mind as well. He tried as much as he could keep focussed on his missions though, as he and Mickey confronted Heartless on most trips. If he was too preoccupied with his thoughts he simply increased the risk of Sora's worst fear, of him getting hurt, coming true.

Sora's anxiety for the most precious person to him was always present. He knew he was being irrational. Knew Riku was strong. Knew he was travelling with Mickey by his side each time he spent a day away, and the two of them had dealt with dangers like these a thousand times before. But the fear was always there.

The nightmares returned immediately. They'd both been expecting it and, when she found Sora knocking on her door the nights Riku was away, Kairi wasn't surprised or bothered. She was relieved more than anything that she could help. It wasn't the same, but having her there kept the nightmares manageable. What neither he nor Riku had predicted though was how much those nightmares would extend into the waking hours as well.

Sora was horribly embarrassed when Aqua had to call Riku back from his second mission. The first one Riku been gone only 24 hours or so, but the second was meant to be longer, with him planning on spending two nights away.

Sora made it through the first night with Kairi sleeping beside him, though didn't sleep much himself. But the unexpected sounds of her and Ven beginning their morning training outside had sent him into a rapid spiral.

The towers were back. The man in the coat was back. The chain around his neck was lifting him higher. Choking him. He couldn't breathe. Couldn't breathe.

He was falling.

It was lucky Aqua had been with him when it came on, and able to stay with him through the two hours it took Riku to fly back. Both she and Terra had plenty of experience with these after helping Ventus through similar attacks in the past. He had been gripped by them frequently throughout the first year or so he spent at the castle.

Riku had sprinted through the door to the lounge to find the two of them sitting on the floor together, Sora curled against Aqua's side as she hugged him. The worst of the attack had passed, but it must have been a horrendous one. Riku had never seen Sora's last more than minutes before, and this time it had lasted close to an hour. Sora hadn't realised how much being unable to fight had made him fear for his own life like this.

He only fully calmed after Riku scooped him up in his arms and carried him back to their room, holding him close until the adrenaline finally left his body and he could sleep. The attacks always left him drained. He spent the rest of the evening apologising over and over to Riku and Aqua.

After this, Riku stuck to day missions as much as possible and refused any which were more than a single night away. Even the day missions were a challenge, but at least one of Aqua, Ven, Kairi, and Terra was there with Sora each time. He felt like a child needing them all so badly. He'd made a promise to Riku though. It was difficult, but he held back his instinct to hide away and let the pain take over in solitude. One step at a time Riku and Aqua told him. One step at a time.

The second panic attack struck a week after the first, and put an end to Riku accepting overnight missions all together. He was furious to find out when he returned in the evening that Aqua hadn't called him to come back when she found Sora gasping for breath on the kitchen floor, Terra and Ventus with their arms around him and Kairi holding his hands. But, it turned out Sora was the one who insisted she didn't.

"It wasn't a bad one, I didn't want to mess up your mission again," he mumbled to him as Riku crouched down beside the bed after he heard from the others what had happened. Kairi was dozing on the couch behind him, not having wanted to leave Sora alone until Riku got back.

"This is way more important than those Sora," he insisted, running a hand through his hair.

"It's alright, the others were here." He smiled at Kairi, then looked at Riku. "You can't always be there when it happens."

Riku hated the truth in his words. "As long as you know that you can call me back whenever you do need me, OK?"

Sora smiled again. "I know."

They both struggled with the separation but tried to accept they couldn't stay permanently glued to each other's side like this. Not physically at least.

Even with the challenges, life was still feeling more and more enjoyable as the weeks went on. Aside from the days Riku spent away, and the occasional bad ones with no apparent cause, he found himself living again, not just surviving. Living, and happy to be living again.

Axel, Roxas, and Xion came to visit sometimes. Aqua and Terra no longer had to rebuff their requests to come over or tell them Sora was too ill to see anyone.

The nightmares came less and less. When they did come Riku was there to hold him through the worst. Sometimes it was him who held Riku through his. They all had some cracks in them. He was learning to accept his the way he had always accepted everyone else's.

Kairi's strategy for him to ease back into fighting had worked out brilliantly and, after a few weeks, he was feeling comfortable training with them again. There had been a few close calls with moments of sudden terror, and the low-grade fear had been constant for a while. But, he hadn't fainted once and knew when he needed to bow out of a match if the anxiety occasionally returned. It would be a while longer before the others stopped going easy on him, something he had struggled to accept at first, but things were still improving.

While he still wasn't quite comfortable enough for it to come out when he trained with the others, his competitive side had well and truly returned when it came to the gliders. They would all race incessantly, Terra and Aqua joining in sometimes. It amused Kairi to no end that Riku and Sora were just as competitive with each other now as they always had been. It seemed being rivals and partners was far from mutually exclusive for the two of them.

Sora was yet to take his glider into the lanes between though (and there was no chance of anyone letting him do that alone) but now he was well enough to fly for long periods, and never bed-bound anymore, he, Kairi, and Riku decided it was time they planned another trip somewhere together. Another chance to go on those adventures together they had dreamed about for so many years.

After everything they had done for him, Sora was desperate to visit Baymax and Hiro to thank them, so they set their sights on San Fransokyo.

Sora was rather miffed to discover that, thanks to an impressive growth spurt, Hiro was now just as tall, if not taller, than him. He still refused to accept he'd be short forever, but it seemed the chances of that changing were getting slimmer. It didn't at all put a damper on his excitement at seeing his friends again though. He leapt on and hugged them all when they arrived at Hiro's house, thrilled to see them again. After hearing about how close Sora had come to death they were all too pleased to hug him back, even those slightly less fond of physical affection.

Sora was about to start introductions when Kairi gave Hiro a cheery wave. "Hi Hiro!"

"Hi Kairi."

"Wait, you guys have met?"

"Not in person, we chatted on the phone back when you were still really sick," Hiro explained. "It's so great to know you're feeling better." He beamed at Sora, who grinned at him and Kairi as well, grateful for them both.

He proceeded to introduce all of Big Hero 6, but as he did Riku couldn't help but notice the strange looks they all seemed to be giving him. Hiro couldn't put his finger on it, but this guy seemed somehow familiar. That hair, and face...

"This is my best friend Kairi, and this is Riku, my boy-

"Hey!" Fred burst out, cutting Sora off and pointing an accusatory finger at Riku. "You're that guy! The one in the coat!"

"What?" Riku stared at this odd person in the monster costume and blinked. Had he really managed to get on someone's bad side already?

"Yeah! You're the one who tried to steal Baymax's chip!" Go-Go yelled and she, Fred, Wasabi, and Honey Lemon all sprung into fighting stances.

"Woah wait! Wait! That wasn't him!" Sora jumped in front of Riku, holding his hands up in front of him. "That guy was a fake! Remember?"

"A fake?" Wasabi sounded frantic, weapon still trained on Riku's chest.

"Yeah!" Hiro recognised Riku's name and waved his hands up at the others as well. "It's OK! Baymax told me about him, he's definitely not the same guy!"

The other four all exchanged glances, still cautious. Then again, this guy was definitely taller than the other, and his eyes were nothing like the eerie golden ones they had seen before...

Sora did his best to explain, which would have been difficult under normal circumstances, let alone when he was speaking twice as fast as normal before there was a chance for any fists to fly. His explanation made almost zero sense to them, but Hiro was on Sora's side in this, and if they both said this Riku guy was OK, then that was enough to convince them.

"It's fine, really," Riku told them as they apologised, keeping his gaze just low enough to avoid all of their eyes. He'd worked hard at forgiving his younger self for the mistakes he had made but thinking about that version of himself, and how that dark replica had stemmed from that made him feel uncomfortable at the best of times. Seeing Sora's friends react like this made him feel somewhat dirty. Unseemly. Like he didn't belong in this part of his life.

Sora reached out and intertwined his fingers with his, squeezing his hand to try and bring him back from his ruminations. He grinned at him and then turned to the others. "This one's the real Riku, he's my boyfriend."

Riku was immediately pulled away from his negative thoughts and felt a sudden warmth in his chest. Boyfriend, not best friend. He realised now that this was the first time Sora had introduced him to anyone new since they first got together. He'd never been introduced as his boyfriend before.

"It's nice to finally meet you properly Riku," Hiro said, and all of Sora's other friends in the room nodded in agreement, looks of suspicion replaced with wide smiles, mostly thanks to Sora's contagious grin. A moment ago he had felt horribly out of place, but the twisted feeling in his stomach was fading.

"Hmmm but Sora?" Go-Go put a hand on her hip and raised an eyebrow at him. "When you saw that fake one, I thought you said he was your friend?"

"Oh, yeah, heh" Sora's smile became a little shy and he rubbed the back of his head. "Well, back then he was." Kairi was giggling audibly.

"You did seem pretty upset when you thought he was on their side..." Hiro joined in the teasing.

"Hey, I knew it wasn't really him!"

"I'm pretty sure it was Donald and Goofy who figured that out, not you."

Kairi burst into another fit of giggles and Riku said "oh really?" He smiled properly now, and it widened as Sora looked up at him, face pink and flustered.

"I- Hey- " Sora glanced around at everyone, it wasn't fair for them to all gang up on him like this. He let go of Riku's hand and crossed his arms. "There was a lot going on, alright!" he huffed, but only Riku heard him over the group's laughter.

After spending the morning at Hiro's with everyone, the three of them used the early afternoon to explore the shopping malls that were so different to any of the shops in the small seaside towns of the Destiny Islands. Kairi and Sora had the time of their lives, and Riku couldn't help getting caught up in their excitement. By the time they left several hours later their wallets were much lighter, and they were slightly concerned about how they were going to carry their purchases back home the next day.

Hiro had suggested they all meet at a famous street food market later on, but Riku and Sora arrived late, with no idea how to find the others in the crowd. Honey Lemon had been all too pleased to distract Kairi for them. While Kairi had gone to see the fancy Bubble Tea place, that was Honey Lemon's favourite, the two boys had snuck back to the store where Kairi had spent so long staring in the window with longing and disappointment. She'd spotted the gorgeous pink and black coat on display too late, having already spent most of her munny.

"I hope we got the right size..." Sora fretted yet again.

"If we didn't then that's what the gift receipt is for."

"Can you see them anywhere?" They'd been wandering the market looking for them for at least 15 minutes, with no luck.

"Nah, maybe give Kairi a call?"

Ignoring his suggestion, Sora shoved the shopping bags he was holding into his arms and jumped on his back, pushing himself up as high as he could with his hands on Riku's shoulders. Even from this height, he couldn't see a familiar face anywhere. "I haven't seen this many people in one place since the Lantern festival in Corona." He dropped down and grinned up at Riku. "We have to go next time, I wanna show you and Kairi the lanterns! Hmm..." He placed a hand on his chin as he thought. "I wonder if Goofy remembers when Rapunzel's birthday is..."

Seeing as Sora was distracted, Riku took out his phone and called Kairi instead. After a minute of talking he groaned and shook his head. "OK, we'll head over. You guys go ahead and eat without us. See you soon." He sighed as he hung up and Sora looked at him quizzically. "Wrong market."

"There's more than one?!" Sora gestured around at the swarm of people. "It must be empty, half the city is here!"

"It's a pretty big city Sora. Come on, it's just a few train stops away."

As they left the crowded side streets and found themselves on the main road again Sora unconsciously moved a little closer to Riku. This place was full of people and life, but the skyscrapers still reminded him a little too much of Quadratum. Riku took his hand and held it tightly, fairly sure he knew what was wrong. Distracted by the unpleasant similarities between the cities as they crossed the multi-laned road towards the station, Sora didn't react fast enough to the enormous boom that rang out behind them. Riku did though.

"Sora!"

Sora felt a shoulder slam into his and was knocked sideways to the ground as Riku shoved him out of the way. As he fell he turned and glimpsed a massive hulking shape out of the corner of his eye, and Riku right where he had stood a split second ago. As if in slow motion, he watched as a metal fist smashed into Riku before he had a chance to summon his Keyblade.

He flew backwards, landing hard on the road and rolling from the momentum, stopping as he slammed into the curb. Even from this distance, Sora could see blood.

"Riku!" Sora sprinted after him, ignoring the Metal Troll that had appeared out of nowhere. Riku's face and neck were covered in blood. Sora dropped to his knees and shook his shoulder, terrified. There was a large gash across his forehead, the source of the blood, and another cut across his stomach that was bleeding through his now torn shirt. His eyes were closed.

Sora summoned his Keyblade to heal him, although he wasn't sure if he'd be able to do much more than slow the bleeding, but before he had a chance there were screams from behind him, followed by a crash. He spun around, battle instincts kicking in. He had to deal with this monstrosity first. It was charging forwards and Sora ran to meet it. These Heartless never attacked alone though, he had to get Riku and the people on the street out of harms way before more appeared.

"STOP!"

He cast a Stopga spell, wishing he was as good as Mickey at time magic. But it was enough to freeze the Troll, giving the citizens in the area a chance to sprint to safety, and he wheeled around again, running back towards Riku.

His heart leapt as he saw him moving, slowly lifting a hand to his head and trying to push himself onto his elbows. Sora skidded to a stop beside him and put his arms under his. "Can you stand?" he asked frantically.

"... what?" Riku staggered as Sora pulled him to his feet, a hand still raised to his spinning head. The relief Sora had felt at seeing him conscious was replaced by fear again.

"Lean on me OK?" He guided Riku away from the road, trying to get him as far away from the Heartless as he could, but he knew he didn't have long. He tried to take as much of Riku's weight as possible as he pulled him towards the closest building.

"What's... going on?" Riku asked as he stumbled along, and his words came out slightly slurred. There wasn't time to get him inside Sora thought, so he'd just have to hope he could put enough distance between them and the Troll.

"Easy..." He lowered Riku carefully down so he could sit against a wall and pulled off one of his own gloves. He shoved it into Riku's hand and then forced him to press it against the gash in his head. "Just keep that there, OK? I'll be back." He could already hear the monster moving behind him as the spell ran out. Riku was confused.

"But, where are you-?" Before he could finish his question Sora had dashed away and, to Riku's horror, was heading directly for a gigantic Heartless.

"Sora!" He wanted to stand up and follow him. He had to get there before he got hurt, but his limbs were moving too slowly. He didn't have a chance to get to his knees before the Heartless was upon him. "No..."

And then Sora shot through the air, Keyblade in hand, and brought it down directly on the skull of the monster.

As the Troll stumbled and overbalanced, Sora flipped back away from it and summoned a shower of lightning bolts, that crashed down on both the giant heartless and the crowd of Soldiers suddenly surrounding it. Riku hadn't even noticed them appear, and they were already dissolving away.

The armoured Heartless roared as the lightning struck it and Sora lunged forward, hoping to finish it off before it had a chance to recover. But the creature was faster than it looked, and it brought its axe around, attempting to slash Sora from its prone position.

Riku could only watch in terror, the bloody glove Sora had told him to hold to his head forgotten. For a heart-stopping moment, he was sure he was about to see Sora die before his eyes. Instead, he watched in awe as Sora smoothly dodged the blade, moving too quickly for his blurry eyes to follow, and then with a screaming crash of metal on metal, the monster was thrown backwards again.

Then, for a while, he wasn't sure what was happening. It seemed each time he blinked the scene before his eyes would shift. His vision was swimming and had become tinged with red. But he could see Sora. He was fighting. Running circles around the Heartless with ease. As he watched him his fear faded away, and he smiled as the red in his vision slowly faded to black.

"Riku! Riku can you hear me?"

Someone was calling out from a long way away and shaking his shoulder. He raised a hand to try and push whoever it was off, not ready to wake up yet. "Goway..."

"Riku!" He recognised the voice this time and dragged his eyes open. Sora's face was floating before him and even with his fuzzy vision he could see the fear in it. "Can you hear me?"

"Yeah..." He tried to nod but something was pressed firmly against his forehead. Sora let out a sharp whistle of relief and beamed at him.

"Good, just sit tight OK? Hiro and Baymax are on their way."

His head was throbbing and whatever was touching his forehead was keeping his skull pushed hard against the wall behind him. He reached up and was surprised to find it was Sora's hand that was pressed against it. "What's going on?" he asked, trying to tug Sora's hand away.

"Hey stop that!" Sora let go of his shoulder and pushed his hand away. "You hurt your head, but Baymax will be here soon. Just sit still you dumbass." He tried to keep his voice light, not wanting Riku to see how scared he was.

Riku stared at him with bleary eyes, and then his gaze moved to the large patch of blood on Sora's shoulder. "You're hurt..." he said groggily, reaching out and touching his sleeve.

"Huh? No, that's all yours."

"Mine?" Riku frowned at him, completely bewildered, and Sora's fear rose again. He pressed the button on the side of his headset, thankful he'd had it with him when they were attacked.

"Hiro? Are you almost here?"

"One minute away, just stay right there Sora!" As he took his hand away from the headset he heard a yell from behind him.

"Sora! Riku!" He turned and saw Kairi dashing towards them, horrified to see them both crouched down and blood everywhere. "Is he OK?" she asked, dropping down beside Sora.

"Not sure, Hiro and Baymax are on their way now."

"Kairi, can you heal him?" Riku mumbled, pointing at Sora's shoulder again.

"You're hurt too?" She turned and gasped at the blood all over his jacket.

"No, I'm fine!" he assured her, holding up a hand before she could cast any magic on him. "It's all his, can you try healing the cut?" He shifted the soaked glove he was holding to Riku's forehead slightly to show her the wide gash. "I'm out of magic."

She summoned her Keyblade and cast Curaga. As the magic rained down on Riku, Sora pulled the glove away, and they watched the skin begin to knit together. The cut was too large to fully heal at once, but the bleeding did at least stop.

"Ow!" Riku winced at the unexpected sensation, then stared at Kairi with all the indignation he could muster in his dazed state. "What'd you do that for?"

Despite the situation, Sora's mouth twitched as he held back a laugh and Kairi giggled. "Sorry Riku, you'll thank me later."

More screams and a sudden roar behind them announced the arrival of yet more Heartless though, and Kairi sprang into action, spinning and charging towards whatever had just appeared. Sora looked back at Riku. He needed to help Kairi deal with the danger, but Riku was staring at him, looking lost and confused. "What's going on Sora?"

Sora glanced anxiously over his shoulder, at Kairi fighting, then back at Riku's worried face. "Just stay here OK? Baymax will be here soon, everything will be fine."

"I don't-"

"I promise, everything will be OK, we'll protect you." He gave Riku the biggest smile he could manage and forced himself to stand up, and rejoin the fight, leaving a disorientated Riku behind.

Just seconds later thankfully, Baymax sailed overhead. He and Kairi tried to focus on the Heartless, snatching quick looks at Baymax's back, unable to see Riku past him. He stayed there a few moments, and then all they could do was watch as he picked Riku up and flew off towards Hiro's garage, and hope that they could follow soon.

Sora burst through the door so abruptly that Hiro jumped and almost fell out of his seat. "Is Riku OK?" He followed Hiro's gaze and saw one of the Baymax's on the other side of the room with his back to the door. A pair of familiar boots stuck off the end of the camp bed he was standing over.

"Riku!" Sora and Kairi cried out in unison and dashed to Baymax's side. Riku's pale skin was even paler than usual and his eyes were closed. A thick bandage had been wrapped around his head, completely obscuring the gash the Metal Troll's attack had left behind. His shirt had been removed and another bandage wrapped around his midriff, covering the other cut he had sustained. The beginnings of an enormous bruise were already extending beyond its edges.

There was terror on Sora's face as he dropped down beside him and gripped Riku's arm and shoulder. Kairi peered over his head, looking just as worried. "Please do not be alarmed, Riku is not seriously injured and is in a stable condition," Baymax tried to reassure them. "He is currently sleeping."

"So he'll be OK?" Sora asked anxiously, turning to look up at Baymax.

"Yes. He has lost a moderate amount of blood and will need to rest and avoid all fighting until his concussion resolves, but he should make a full recovery."

"Phew..." Sora let out a deep sigh of relief and leaned his head forward to rest on the edge of the bed, waiting for his heart rate to slowly come down. Kairi put a hand on his shoulder, smiling widely and taking slow, steadying breaths as relief flooded her as well.

"Thank you so much Baymax, Hiro," she said once she was able to speak again, beaming at the two of them.

"You are welcome, I am here to help," Baymax replied with a slight bow of his head.

"Maybe we should start charging you guys," Hiro grinned back at her and she laughed.

"Would that mean we could take a Baymax with us then?" Sora said hopefully as he lifted his head back up, only half joking.

"Definitely not Sora," Hiro snickered, crossing his arms.

"Awww," Sora whined but grinned at Hiro as pushed himself to his feet, satisfied now that Riku was going to be alright. "Seriously though, thank you so much guys, it's such a relief... he's going... to be..." As Sora spoke his voice seemed to be fading, and he felt an all too familiar spinning sensation. "Oh no..."

Knowing what was coming he let himself drop to his knees so he could lean against the side of the bed again, and Kairi knelt down beside him. "Are you OK?" she asked anxiously. Behind her, Hiro leapt off his chair and dashed over.

"Might be gonna... faint..." he managed to say before he slumped to the floor.

"Baymax?" Hiro quickly turned to him, moving away from his semi-conscious friend so the robot could scan him.

A second later Baymax had completed his assessment. "Sora is unhurt, but is suffering from exhaustion."

"You can say that again..." Sora mumbled, eyes half open.

"Phew..." Hiro let out a relieved whistle.

Kairi gave a small laugh, then put a hand on Sora's shoulder and rubbed his arm. He looked awfully uncomfortable with his cheek pressed against the concrete floor, and it seemed he wasn't going to be sitting up for a while. She shifted so she could sit beside him, and lifted his shoulders so he could rest his head on her legs. "Thanks." He smiled up at her gratefully.

"Maybe you need a nap as well."

"Maybe..."

She laughed quietly again as he closed his eyes, and stroked his hair fondly. "Thank you, Hiro, for everything." She looked back up at him and smiled. "We owe you and Baymax so much."

"It's no problem, Kairi," he said, smiling at her and then down at Sora, who seemed to be half asleep already. "We owe Sora just as much. I'm glad he has you guys to watch out for him as well."

When Riku dragged his eyes open he was confused. The ceiling above him was unfamiliar, hadn't he been outside somewhere? He pushed himself slowly onto his elbows, wondering who the mix of quiet voices filling the space around him belonged to.

He tried to look around, fairly sure he'd seen this place before, but with no idea how he had gotten there, or why he was lying in a camp bed with a blanket pulled over him. There were a lot of people there. His eyes came to stop on the first familiar face he saw, Kairi, sitting at the end of his bed. Her face lit up as she noticed he was awake.

"Riku!" she cried out joyfully, and Sora spun around in his chair beside the makeshift bed.

"Riku! Are you OK? How are you feeling?" He made to sit up and Sora quickly put an arm around his shoulders to help. His head throbbed as he moved and he groaned. He tried to rub his forehead, and his fingers met cloth instead of skin.

"Hey take it easy," Sora told him and took hold of his hand before he had a chance to inadvertently pull the bandages off.

"What's... going on?"

"You got hit in the head pretty hard, you've been asleep for a couple of hours."

"Asleep?" Riku surveyed the room around him again, this time slowly recognising Hiro's garage and the people standing around.

"Yeah, we're back at Hiro's place," Sora explained, arm still around him and looking worried. "How are you feeling?"

"Ugh... Bad headache."

Baymax insisted on further assessing Riku now he was awake. He ran through a list of questions that were very familiar to Sora, asking Riku if he felt ill ("yes"), dizzy ("very"), if his vision was blurry ("yes"), and if he knew where he was ("uhh..."). It sounded far worse than Sora's had been when he first woke and he was starting to worry. Kairi pointed out he'd slept through the first week of his concussion though, and Riku's had started just hours ago.

"What is the last thing that you remember?" Baymax finally asked.

"I think... we were outside somewhere," he mumbled, frowning as he tried to recall. "I remember Heartless... oh," he turned to Sora and broke into a wide, dopey grin, "and you fighting... You were amazing."

There was a touch more adoration in his voice than he would usually use in front of other people. Fred made a loud "OoooOOooh" sound, causing most of the room to giggle.

Riku gave Fred a puzzled look, unsure what joke he had missed, but smiled again as Sora laughed happily and kissed him on the cheek. "Thanks."

Baymax assured them that his initial assessment, that the concussion was not severe and the symptoms would resolve was accurate. Everyone in the room breathed a sigh of relief.

"Roxas, Xion, and Axel are on their way in a ship so they can drop you guys off at home and take over here with me," Kairi told Riku once Baymax was finished. "They'll be here in about an hour."

"Why do we need a ship?"

"There is no way you are flying your glider right now!"

Oh right. She made a good point. Gliders and concussions might not be a good mix.

His head was feeling heavy, so he leaned down and let it rest on Sora's shoulder and was pleased to receive another kiss on the top of his head, while Sora rubbed his arm. The others returned to theorising why the Heartless might have been there in the first place. Sora was lamenting the loss of their shopping, the bags having been forgotten during the battle.

It didn't take long for Riku to lose track of the conversation. He appreciated them keeping their voices down, his head was pounding horribly. It took him a while to notice how strangely blurry the room around him was though. He lifted his head and squinted. Since when did he need glasses? Someone had their arm around him and when he turned he was relieved to find Sora sitting next to him. Maybe he knew what was going on. "Sora?"

"Yeah?"

"Where are we?"

"Oh wow you really are out of it," Sora said, a touch of amusement in his voice. He smiled and rubbed his arm again. "We came back to Hiro's because you got hurt. Baymax says you've got a concussion, but it's OK, you'll be fine."

"Oh... right..." That explained a lot. Maybe he didn't need glasses after all. He raised a hand to his forehead again, lightly touching the bandages covering the bruises and cut.

"Lie back down Riku," Kairi said gently. "We'll wake you up when it's time to leave."

He stared at her with a faraway expression, then turned to Sora who nodded at him. Still confused, but reassured, he lay down. Sora took his hand and squeezed it. "Get some more rest. Don't worry, I'll be here." Riku gave him a small smile and closed his eyes again.

They walked slowly up the stairs to the castle, Sora keeping an arm around Riku's waist as he held on to him for balance. He was still a little unsteady on his feet. Despite the mild temperature of the early evening Riku still felt uncomfortably chilly. He was grateful for the warm jumper he was wearing, though he wasn't entirely sure where it had come from. Wasabi had lent it to him, seeing as his own shirt was now torn and his jacket soaked in just as much blood as Sora's, but Riku's short-term memory hadn't managed to hold on to that fact.

Roxas held the tall door open for them and followed them in. He was worried about Riku now himself, after seeing him almost faint when he stood up in the Gummi ship just a minute before. At least some of Sora's forgiving nature must have carried over to him. It had taken him a surprisingly short time to forgive Riku for the things he had done to him and Xion in order to wake Sora up so long ago.

The intense bitterness he had felt towards him upon regaining a body had quickly faded and turned to unexpected friendship after Riku apologised to them all for what he'd had to do. They understood why he had done it. In his place, they probably would have done the same thing. Considering how much Riku meant to Sora, perhaps it wasn't so unexpected he'd forgiven him.

While Roxas went to find the others, Sora helped Riku to the lounge. "Know where you are now?" he asked as he eased them both down onto a couch. Riku leaned back into the pillows and relaxed a little now he could sit down again. Walking had brought on a wave of nausea and a dull ache in his stomach.

"Yeah... did you say I hit my head?"

"Hey you remembered something, that's an improvement!" Riku gave him a puzzled look and Sora put a hand on his shoulder. "Yeah you got knocked out, and hit in the stomach pretty hard, Baymax said you'll be fine in a few days though."

"Really?" Maybe that was why he didn't recognise the jumper he was wearing.

"Yeah, I think this is maybe..." he thought for a moment, counting on his fingers, "...the fifth time I've told you." He grinned at Riku's bewildered expression. "Welcome to the concussion club."

"I didn't end up with a dumb haircut too did I?" he asked with a smirk, but reached up to check his hair just in case.

"No, you got lucky," Sora huffed. "But you might end up with a matching scar."

"Damn..."

When Roxas and the others eventually joined them in the lounge Sora waved rather than greeting them. Riku was resting his head on his shoulder again, and he wasn't sure if he had dozed off or not. Aqua reached out to try and carefully remove the bandage from Riku's forehead without waking him. As she pulled it away though his eyes opened, and he looked up at her blearily. "Hi Aqua."

"Hi Riku," she smiled. "Looks like you got hit quite hard."

"That's what they tell me..." He sat back up to let Aqua examine the cut. As she cast her spell he screwed his eyes up while the magic passed into his skin, then relaxed as his headache waned a little.

"There, I don't think it will leave a scar, but I'll need to work on it again tomorrow after you've had some rest," Aqua told him as she replaced the bandage.

"Thanks, Aqua."

"Guess we won't match then," Sora sighed in feigned disappointment.

As Ven and Roxas both made sounds of amusement Riku turned to them and frowned, squinting from one to the other and back again. "Why are there two of you?"

They looked back at him with just as much confusion, then at each other, and everyone but Riku burst out laughing. "Wow, you really took a hit," Roxas said once he stopped chuckling. "Riku, it's Ven and me, Ro-"

"Wait!" Ven held a hand up, grinning gleefully. "Let's see how long it takes him."

Riku looked back and forth between them a few more times, no less confused, before giving up and turning back to Sora. The world seemed far more complicated than usual right now, but he at least seemed to know what was going on. Thank goodness he had him to anchor himself to.

With the pounding in his head lessened he was now much more aware of the pain in his midriff, and just how queasy he was feeling. Sora could see the discomfort on his face, and his skin was still extra pale. "You're not looking too good, time for bed I reckon," he told him with a squeeze of his shoulder and a sympathetic look. Riku nodded slowly. Sora helped him to his feet and out of the room, leaving Ven and Roxas both a little offended that Riku hadn't managed to tell them apart.

"You were brilliant by the way..." Riku told him, as Sora guided him back to their room. The past few hours were hazy, but that was one thing he definitely remembered. "You fought just like you used to."

Sora beamed up at him "Thanks." He paused, as the tiny glow of pride he'd been feeling since Riku's earlier compliment grew a little. "That means a lot." He didn't think it worth mentioning that, despite his nap, he felt just as drained as Riku looked, and suspected his muscles would be complaining for days. It seemed it would be a while longer before he managed to fully recover his past strength and stamina. But it was coming back. It was really coming back!

Once he'd helped Riku to bed and was satisfied he was OK and comfortable Sora collapsed beside him, too tired to even draw back the blankets on his side.

Riku felt him flop down and smiled, glad he was staying to keep him company. "So, how did it feel to fight again?" he mumbled into his pillow. Sora didn't reply though. Riku turned to find his eyes were closed, and he was already fast asleep with his mouth hanging open. He suppressed a laugh, marvelling, not for the first time, at just how quickly Sora could fall asleep when he needed it.

It only occurred to him now that he must be exhausted, not having fought that hard in so long. He hoped he hadn't pushed himself too far...

Riku smiled as he felt a rush of affection and placed a hand on Sora's cheek. "Thank you."

The next morning Riku's memory seemed to be fully functional again, though the previous day remained blurry. The concussion was clearly still there though because he had woken up with his head still aching, and feeling horribly nauseous. Sora had demanded he eat breakfast even if the idea of it made his stomach turn. "You hardly ate yesterday, you'll feel better if you're not starving!" he'd insisted, and turned out he was right. Food did help, but the morning light in the kitchen and the others chatting had moved his moderate headache to an intense pounding behind his eyes.

When he and Sora returned to their room he crawled back into bed, ready for more sleep. He was glad they hadn't fully opened the curtains when they got up and the room was still dim. He gave a sigh of relief as he closed his eyes. The aching of the deep bruises in his stomach dulled a little as he relaxed into the sheets. "Need anything?" Sora asked.

"Nah, thanks though." All he wanted right now was sleep.

"OK, let me know if you do!" he said brightly and jumped into bed next to him with the Gummi GS already in his hands. His muscles were screaming at him for what he'd put them through the day before, so he was ready to spend the rest of that day - and probably the next - lazing around as well.

Riku opened his eyes and smiled at both the strangeness, and the familiarity of the situation. "I like it a lot more this way around," he mumbled.

"What do you mean?"

"You not being the sick one. I definitely prefer this way around."

"I definitely don't," Sora replied with a scowl.

"What?" That made no sense. "I'm way less sick than you ever were."

"Well... I still don't like it."

Riku chuckled. "Like it better when you're the one getting taken care of?"

"I like it better when you don't need to be taken care of." Sora's face moved from his grumpy scowl to unease. "That was really scary..."

Riku reached out and put an arm around his waist, snuggling into his side. "Don't worry, I'm alright now."

"You better be," he said with another glare, but then his expression softened into a smile, and he began running his hand through Riku's hair. "I guess looking after you is kind of nice though."

Riku closed his eyes and smiled at his touch, remembering doing the same thing to help ease his headaches in the past. It must have worked on him as well because it took just a few minutes for him to fall asleep. Sora left his hand in his hair for a while, game forgotten.

He'd have to wait untill Riku was feeling a bit better again before telling him about Rage... Maybe he'd talk to Kairi about it instead when she got back.

Initially, he'd been dying to tell them. The fact that the urge to change had come over him in the heat of battle the day before, and he'd been able to push it back so quickly, so easily, had been the most thrilling thing.

It was the first time Rage had momentarily prickled beneath his skin, a feeling he had been petrified of for months. But resisting it had felt just like it had in the past. It had been a choice and if he hadn't been worried about Riku and desperately defending people from Heartless at the time he probably would have whooped and cried with joy.

This morning though that feeling was gone, replaced with fear and self-doubt. Or maybe self-loathing was a more appropriate word. He was still tainted. That darkness was still there. That ugly part of his being was still there. It repulsed him.

He winced and held in a cry of pain, at the abrupt stab in his heart. After several seconds he unclenched his teeth and let out a long, low whistle as he stopped holding his breath. He guessed he was probably overdue for a particularly bad one of those pains by now, it had been several days since the last one. It was a good thing Riku was already asleep. He didn't need anything extra to worry about right now.

He didn't get a chance to dwell on Rage for much longer though, as his phone started buzzing and he snatched it up quickly before it woke Riku. Two messages from Kairi. He'd missed the earlier one, asking how Riku was feeling, but the new one made him beam and drove all his unpleasant thoughts away.

"Went back to the market and found your things! Thank you so much 3 love you guys"

She must have noticed her name written on one of the boxes in their bags. Along with the message, she had sent a photo of her wearing the coat they had been so looking forward to giving her.

One of the others must have taken the picture for her so she could show it off, and he suspected it would be up on the Gummi network soon. She looked like she was midway through a twirl, with the widest smile on her face. It was some of the best munny he'd ever spent.

"Looks amazing! Riku thinks so too"

And he followed the message with a grinning picture of him and Riku, which he was sure Riku would hate him for later.

Chapters 31 and 32 on AO3