Ranma 1/2
OVA #2:
"Adventures in Brother-Sitting"
FEATURING THE VOICE TALENTS OF
Michael Donovan as Ryoga Hibiki/Wilbur
Blake Ewing as Little Ryoga/'Ryo-chan'
Terry Klassen as the Mushroom Farmer
Sarah Strange as Ranma Saotome
Elizabeth G. Daily as Little Ranma
Rick Jones as Kenma Saotome
Christine Cavanaugh as Little Kenma
Myriam Sirois as Akane Tendo
Willow Johnson as Kasumi Tendo
Farrell Spence as Nabiki Tendo
David Kaye as Soun Tendo
Collin Murdock as Genma Saotome
Terrence MacGovern as Jinn the Djinn
NOTE: This will be replacing the "Reawakening Memories" 2-parter, because I found that OVA to be really boring. Plus, it is HEAVILY geared towards the Ranma/Akane ship, so...you can see how that would be considered counterproductive to what I've got planned.
Somewhere, out in the woods, far from civilization, on a log sat Ryoga, roasting something over a crackling campfire.
It's been three days since I wandered out here, he thought to himself as he turned his stick a couple of times. And during that time, I ran out of food—except for this little mushroom I dug up this evening…
He blew on it a couple of times, pulled it off the stick and popped it into his mouth. Ah...so good…
"HEY, DON'T EAT THAT!" shouted a voice; the next thing Ryoga felt was a hand shoving his back, and then he swallowed the mushroom with a gulp.
"OH, NO! YOU ATE IT!" the man exclaimed, shocked.
"Because you shoved me!" Ryoga retorted. The strange man shrugged.
"On the plus side, that mushroom wasn't poisonous…" he said. "...but still…"
"Hey, what's this all about anyway?" asked Ryoga.
"I mean, you won't DIE from eating that mushroom," the man informed him. "But, if you eat the mushrooms of this forest...first your heart starts a-thumpin'…"
As he explained, Ryoga felt his heart begin thumping. I mean, it always did that, but this one felt different than normal.
"And then, before y'know it…'SWISH-!'" the man exclaimed.
And right when he said that, Ryoga felt like the entire world was spinning around him; suddenly, he felt very, very dizzy…
...and then, everything went dark.
It's been three days since then. Nobody's heard from Ryoga since…
"The Curse of the Mushroom of Time!
Little Ryoga Means Big Trouble"
Ranma and Kenma were in the midst of a stroll through town when they both overheard a familiar squealing sound. Heading to its source, they saw that it was, of course, Wilbur.
"Well, well, if it isn't Wilbur," commented Ranma as he and his brother arrived at the source. "And he's been...collecting mushrooms?"
"They mush not have taken up much-room in his stomach!" joked Kenma. "Just look at him, he's half his regular size!"
"Well, then I guess there's no problem with ME having one," said Ranma as he reached for a mushroom—and suddenly felt Wilbur's teeth biting down on his fingers. "YOW! Kenma, spray him! Spray him!"
"I got it!" Kenma called, pulling out one of his squirt guns and opening fire on Wilbur, catching him right in the face and knocking him over. But when the piglet hit the ground, he wasn't a piglet anymore. In fact, he was a kindergartner!
"No. Friggin'. Way." the redheaded boy snorted. "...OH, MY GOD! Ranma, get a load of THIS!"
"What? What is it?" asked Ranma as he ran over, and got a good look at the diminutive Ryoga. He immediately snorted, before he erupted into a torrent of laughter. "HOLY SHIT!"
"Dammit, stop laughing at me!" Ryoga yelled, but because of his high-pitched, child's voice, neither Saotome boy could take him seriously. Not to say that they took him seriously to begin with, of course…
By now, both Saotome brothers were on the ground, laughing their heads off as tears of mirth came to their eyes. Ryoga, due to his reduced size, couldn't exactly retaliate, so he had to wait until the laughter ceased.
"...the 'Mushroom of Time'?" asked Ranma, surprised.
"So you're saying that eating this mushroom makes you young?" Kenma added.
Ryoga nodded firmly. "From what I was told, it'll make you younger in proportion to its size," he explained. "If you eat a 5-cm one, you become a 5-year-old. If you eat a 10-cm-one, you become 10 years old."
Kenma rubbed his chin. "So that means if you grow this thing to 17 centimeters and eat it, you'll be 17 again?" he asked, glancing at the mushroom.
"Yup," replied Ryoga. "An' that's why I'm not coming to the Tendo Dojo this time. Give Akane my regards."
Before he could trudge off, he was tripped up courtesy of Ranma stepping on his loosely trailing clothes.
"I might not be a straight-A student, but even I know living in a child-sized body won't be a picnic," informed the black-haired boy. "How about I come up with a cover story so you can crash at the Tendos' place for a while?"
Ryoga felt his eyes tear up a bit, and he wiped them. "You know something, Ranma?" he asked. "We might not always get along, but you're a real stand-up guy when you wanna be!"
"Ah, think nothin' of it!" Ranma insisted as he waved off the compliment. "We're friends, ain't we?"
A SHORT TIME LATER, BACK AT THE DOJO…
"WHAAAAT?!" Akane blurted in surprise. "You mean THAT'S Ryoga's son?!"
"IT'S A LIE, IT'S A LIE, IT'S A LIE!" protested Ryoga while Kenma was clutching his sides, rolling on the floor and laughing his ass off.
Nabiki leaned down to inspect the little boy. "He and Ryoga sure do look alike…" she observed.
"But with who?!" Akane asked.
Kenma shrugged as he managed to catch his breath. "Well…he's been on the road for a while," he commented. "No doubt he would eventually run into somebody who caught his fancy."
"Odds are, she's probably just as horrible and nasty as he is." Ranma remarked with a smug smirk…which was wiped from his face as he was KLONKED in the head with a very familiar umbrella.
"I'm his little brother!" Ryoga corrected.
Nabiki glanced again. "Well, that does sound much more likely," she commented.
… … … …
"OK, if we're gonna grow mushrooms, we need someplace dark and humid," said Kenma. "Know any places around here like that?"
Seeing that the onsen was out of order, inspiration struck Ranma. "...I may know one," he commented as he slid the door open and headed in.
"Why is the onsen out of order?" Ryoga asked, as that was his primary spot to change back into a guy when his curse activated.
"Blame my fat-ass panda for a poor excuse of a father for that one." Kenma bluntly put it.
"Sheesh! Your dad sucks!" the bandana-wearing boy said.
"Ya know, that's the first time you've ever said something smart." Ranma agreed.
"Thanks, I—HEY!" Ryoga shouted at that insult.
Kenma snickered at that as they left the mushrooms in the onsen and exited. A few minutes later, Soun came by the onsen door and saw the OUT OF ORDER sign.
"Hmm…I see I forgot to take this down," he said as he plucked it off.
…yeah, that's gonna be a problem later.
AND SO!
Ryoga was now being fitted in a pair of pink overalls with a fishbone design on the front.
"Oh, my…they fit just right!" Kasumi beamed.
"Awww! But I don't like pink!" groaned Ryoga.
"These are Akane's from when she was little," explained the eldest Tendo daughter. "I guess it's a good thing I held onto them!"
Upon hearing that, Ryoga immediately changed his tune. "...r-really?" he asked. "I mean…if that's the case, I guess they're not TOO bad…"
Inwardly, he was over the moon with joy. My body…is being caressed by Akane's clothes…!
"Why don't you come over and sit on my lap, then, Ryo-chan?" asked Akane.
Ryoga immediately went tomato-faced and frantically waved his hands. "I-I couldn't do that!" he insisted. "I w-wouldn't dream of taking advantage of your kindness like—well, if you insist, I could sit for a little while…"
Akane giggled as she put the little guy on her lap. "Aw, he's so polite!" she beamed. "And so cute, too!"
To say Ryoga was completely blindsided by the hug he received would be an understatement. M-maybe this isn't so bad…I guess I could bear with this for a little while— he began, before he suddenly found himself picked up by Soun.
"Well! What an adorable little youngster!" the Tendo patriarch beamed before he began rubbing Ryoga on his stubble-covered cheeks, much to his dismay.
"Father's so excited to have a boy to play with at last," smiled Kasumi.
"Maybe," replied Nabiki as she ate a potato stick. "But the kid isn't too happy."
"Go for it, Mr. Tendo!" Kenma called. "The kid can't get enough a' this!"
"Yeah, ya got carte blanche!" Ranma added.
On second thought, those mushrooms couldn't grow back soon enough! Ryoga groaned inwardly.
"Yee-ouch! Your cheeks feel like Brillo pads!" the bandana-wearing boy screamed in agony as Ranma began to chuckle.
Later at night, after Ryoga recovered from having his face scratched mercilessly by Soun's stubble, everyone was going about their business as Ryoga was on Akane's lap as they all watched some TV.
"Oh, Akane, it's getting late," Kasumi stated as she finished doing some laundry. "You should take a bath before bed."
"You're right," said the youngest Tendo as she picked up Ryoga. "How about you come along, Ryo-chan? You could probably use a bath too!"
Ryoga's eyes shot open, and he nearly collapsed from a heart attack due to sudden shock. Take…take a bath? With AKANE?! It's a dream come true…this is my best chance! My ONLY chance, even!
He was jolted out of his daydreams by a sudden KLONK! to his head, courtesy of Kenma with a plastic baseball bat.
"Don't get cheeky," chastised the monkey-boy.
Ryoga got out of Akane's lap, toddled over to Kenma and Ranma, and then kicked them each in their left shins.
"OW!/OOH-WOO-WOO!" the brothers shouted before they got to their feet. "WHY, YOU LITTLE—!" they chorused before racing off after the fleeing little tyke.
"Come ere', ya little runt!" Ranma bellowed as they all ran down the hallway. Of course, Ryoga wasn't so easily deterred.
"Nyaah! You can't catch me!" he taunted as he stuck his tongue out. "Bleh-leh-lehhhh~!"
"Oh, yeah?" Kenma remarked as he wound up his tail like a lasso and threw it ahead
"Hey!" the little pork cracklin' shouted as he was reeled in by his waist.
"Hay is for horses, kid," Ranma joked. "So give up, wouldja? We gots ya dead to rights! All tied-up with no-place to go!"
"Oh, is that right?" Ryoga asked as he put his hands on his forehead, and then squeezed his eyes shut. "SOLAR FLARE!"
Suddenly, a tremendous flash of light shone forth! As both boys quickly covered their eyes, Ryoga slipped out of Kenma's tail [which had loosened its grip on him due to his sudden distraction], and headed off towards the bathroom.
"And now, for that bath! I'll be right with you, Akane!" he declared as he ran.
As Kenma and Ranma were waiting for their temporary blindness to fade, they overheard Ryoga's shout.
"Wait a second…BATH?" Ranma asked.
"Isn't that where we stored the—" began Kenma.
And then, both boys realized what had happened. "Uh-oh!" they both exclaimed.
Right after, they heard Ryoga screaming in horror. As their vision spots cleared up, they both took off to the bathroom. When they came inside, they saw Ryoga, staring in open-mouthed horror, at the now ruined Mushrooms of Time, floating in the tub.
"The mushrooms. They're RUINED!" the little tyke wailed as he began to cry hysterically.
"But I don't understand!" Ranma exclaimed. "I put them in here because I figured nobody would bother them! I mean, with the sign on the door and all—"
"Uh, brother?" asked Kenma. "...the sign isn't there anymore."
"Whaddya mean it's not there anymore?"
"I mean, somebody must've removed it!"
"Okay! Where's the putz who did this?! I'm gonna beat the living daylights out of 'em!"
"Oh, I see the bath is working fine." Soun stated as he walked by. "Good thing I remembered to take the sign down after the repair man left."
"...It was fixed the whole time?" Both brothers said in disbelief at that news, while Ryoga was growling in anger.
"Yes, it was. Perhaps I should've told you before." the Tendo patriarch admitted.
"Gee, ya think?!" Kenma shouted as he slapped Soun in the face with his tail.
"Ow! What was that for?" Soun said while rubbing his cheek.
"Because of that, now the mushrooms are ruined!" Kenma spat. "So just how is Ryoga supposed to get back to his normal age now, huh?"
"I don't know, grow up normally and wait 10 years?" Ranma suggested.
"And deal with him going through puberty? Hell no!" Kenma countered back. "I am NOT running down to the pharmacy to buy him zit cream!"
Neither of them noticed Ryoga reaching into the tub and grabbing a few of the mushrooms.
"I think I have an idea…" Ryoga smirked at the both of them with a manic grin on his face. "How about I fix this BY KILLING YOU BOTH?!" Ryoga shouted before leaping onto Ranma's face and attacking him.
"Shit! He's gone Face-Hugger on us!" Kenma shouted as he tried to get the diminutive lost boy off his brother's face.
Ryoga just hissed and threw one of the mushrooms right into Kenma's throat. The monkey-boy coughed and gagged, before getting it down and continuing to pull at Ryoga's back.
As Ranma tried to pull his opponent off, Ryoga tossed another of the mushrooms in once he saw his chance, then released Ranma's face from his grip.
"Okay, Ranma—NOW YOU DIE!" he shouted as he stuck out his left index finger and fired a yellow beam that blew the bathroom door apart, sending both Saotome brothers flying…and right into Akane and Nabiki's arms.
"That dirty rat-fink!" Ranma exclaimed…in a now much higher voice.
"Yeah, he can't do that to uth!" added Kenma in an also higher voice. "How'd he learn the Dodon-pa? Oh, when I get my handth on 'im, I'm gonna…gonna…"
Then, both boys looked down at themselves, and at each other. "WHAT THE—WE'RE LITTLE KIDS!" they exclaimed in shock.
"Well, this is just great!" Ranma complained.
"You're telling me!" Kenma remarked. "Now we hafta use stthep-stools for everything!..AND I HAVE A THPEECH IMPEDIMENTH!"
"It's not fair, dammit! It's not fair!" the older Saotome continued to complain.
"WAAAAAAAAAAH!" Both brothers bawled as they clutched each other.
EYECATCH CARD:
6-year-old Ranma and Kenma are standing on each other's shoulders, while Ranma reaches for a cookie jar, and Kenma is holding him up while standing on the Flying Nimbus.
RANMA ½ will be right back after these messages!
EYECATCH CARD #2:
Little Ranma and Kenma are riding the Nimbus, soaring through town, while Akane, Soun, Genma and Kasumi are running behind them.
And now, here's more RANMA! [With KENMA, too!]
SOME TIME LATER, AFTER ALL EXPLANATIONS HAVE BEEN MADE…
"Egad! So not only has Ryoga been de-aged by those mushrooms, but Ranma and Kenma have been de-aged as well?" Soun gasped.
"That seems to be the long-and-short of it, Tendo," nodded Genma.
"Well, it serves you two right for picking on Ryoga the way you did." Akane scolded.
"Thith coming from the one who wath gonna bathe with him…?" Kenma retorted dryly.
"Come on, he was a toddler!" the tomboy tried to justify.
"Doesn't matter, it was still Ryoga. So why don't ya spare us the lectures, capiche?" remarked Ranma.
"OK, somehow, we have to find that muthroom forest plathe, get new muthrooms, and age ourthelves back to normal!" Kenma declared.
"But how? We don't know anybody who knows the forest as well as Ryoga." Ranma riposted before snapping his fingers. "Unless…we use the flying nimbus to get a bird's eye view of the place!"
"Now THERE'th an idea!" Kenma grinned proudly.
"Well, what're we waitin' for? Let's go find us some fungi!" Ranma declared as he and Kenma sprang to their feet.
But before they could get a move on, Jinn plucked them both up by their heads. "Whoa! Put on the brakes for a second!" he said. "Slow down; it's not every day one gets a chance at reliving their childhood, y'know!"
"But Jinn, what we've got work to do." the ponytailed toddler pleaded.
"Come on, Ranma. I'm sure this whole mushroom business can wait for a few minutes or so," advised Jinn.
Kenma rubbed his chin in thought. "...you know, he'th got a point," he told his big brother. "We never got to just…like, be kids cuz of that stthupid training trip we had to go on!"
Ranma then began to think about the last time he actually got to have fun…which was easy to gloss over, considering how long ago it was.
"You're right, Ken! It has been a while since we were just able to have fun!" he said. "But I think it's about time we rectified that!"
"See? That's the spirit!" Jinn cheered. "Now get out there and live it up, ya crazy tykes."
"Just a minute, boys!" protested Genma. "The sooner you find those mushrooms, the sooner you can resume your proper ages and continue the path you're meant to be on!"
Ranma and Kenma both rolled their eyes in annoyance. "Booo-ring!" they said, before they took off laughing, leaving the Saotome patriarch behind.
"...unbelievable…" remarked Soun as Genma fumed angrily behind them. "They have even LESS respect for you than they did originally…"
"Is it really that much of a surprise?" replied Nabiki.
"...no, I suppose not," stated Soun.
"Let's get outta here!" Ranma said as he led the way out.
"Woo-hoo-hoo!" Kenma whooped as he trailed behind.
"Oh, I hope they don't get too hurt while playing." Kasumi worried like any mother-figure would.
"I'd be more worried about the town…" murmured Akane, her face blue with shock.
"Uh, girls?" Nabiki started to say when she noticed something. "Where's Ryoga?"
"Huh….he was just here a second ago." Akane said as she looked around the room.
"Where do you suppose he could've gone to?" Kasumi queried.
"Maybe he's trying to get another one of those mushrooms!" Akane gasped.
"Is that all?" asked Nabiki. "...in that case, he's screwed. The guy couldn't find his way out of a maze if it were on a kiddie placemat at a restaurant."
"True, but he does seem to know his way around forests." the tomboy stated, attempting to give Ryoga the benefit of the doubt.
"Maybe," shrugged Nabiki. "But he sure as hell can't find a way through them."
"Uhhh…no. No, he can't." Akane admitted.
MEANWHILE…!
Ranma and Kenma were soaring through Nerima, atop the Flying Nimbus, enjoying the feel of the wind in their faces, and in their hair.
"Is this awesome, or what?" called Kenma.
"I'll say!" agreed Ranma. "So…what should we do first?"
"Wanna go fishing for crawdads?" suggested Kenma. "I thaw thome in the thream a few dayth ago!"
"Sure! Then Kasumi can cook 'em up for dinner." his brother agreed.
But as they glanced over the cloud's sides, they spotted a familiar bandana-clad boy carrying a map.
"Hey! It'th Ryoga!" Kenma pointed out. "I bet he went to look f'r the mushroom foresth!"
"Let's swoop in and pay our little friend a visit." Ranma suggested.
"Right! OK, Nimbus—DIVE!" Kenma pointed, and the cloud swooped down towards the lost boy, who was still moving along, aimless as usual.
"Where, oh where did I find those mushrooms?" Ryoga asked himself as he wondered. Of course, as he continued his trek, he suddenly found himself lifted off the ground!
"What the—?! What's going on? Why am I flying?" the little piglet panicked
"Yoo-hoo, porky!" called Ranma with a smirk.
As soon as Ryoga realized who had grabbed him, his eyebrows furrowed. "Oh, it's you again, Ranma." he said with utter disgust.
"The one and only!" the ponytailed toddler replied with a smug smile. "And I suggest you don't try anything stupid. My grip isn't very strong with these little boy hands."
"Put me down, you stupid jerk faces!" Ryoga shouted at his rival.
"You may wanna rephrathe that, given how high we are." Kenma pointed out before Ryoga looked down to the road below him.
His eyes going wide, he immediately stopped struggling.
"I thuppothe you had a plan to find your way to the Mushroom Foreth?" asked Kenma.
"Well, DUH!" Ryoga snapped. "I have a map!"
"Oh, like you could even FOLLOW a map!" snapped Ranma. "You get lost going in a straight line!"
"My sense of direction is NOT that bad!" Ryoga protested.
"I could tell you to close your eyes and walk five feet, and you would somehow be better at finding your house than you would with your eyes open," stated Ranma flatly.
Ryoga angrily crossed his arms and grumbled something unintelligible under his breath.
"Lemme thee that map," Kenma said as he reached down.
The map was nearly impossible to read…not to mention it was mostly drawings.
"...THITH ITH YOUR THO-CALLED MAP?!" he screamed.
"This is nothin' but a buncha doodles!" added Ranma. "Ryoga, I swear I'm gonna pound ya!"
SHORTLY!
Soon, Akane found the three kids sitting on a bench. "You got lost, didn't you?" she asked.
"Don't look at us," shrugged Ranma. "You can thank Magellan for that," he added, pointing at Ryoga.
"Hey! My directions weren't that bad!" the piglet replied.
"Dude, YETH THEY WERE!" Kenma snapped. "ALL THEY WERE WAS A BUNCHA DOPEY THCRIBBLETH!"
Akane groaned as she heard them argue again, "Oh come on, it couldn't be that bad." Kenma gave her Ryoga's map as she looked over it. "...Okay, I stand corrected, this is bad."
"Told ya!" Ranma groaned.
Akane rolled her eyes. "Come on, rugrats," she said as she took them by the hands. "I may as well show you something."
Once they got home, Akane showed them what she wanted—namely, that there were some new mushrooms growing on Ryoga's backpack.
"...so there IS still hope!" Ryoga gulped, his eyes wet with tears of joy.
"Some mushroom spores must've landed on it and taken root," noted Akane. "Now you'll ALL be able to—"
Before she even finished her sentence, Ryoga took the backpack and made a run for it.
"HEY! AFTER HIM!" Kenma shouted, and he and Ranma immediately went off in pursuit.
"I'm just gonna guard them while they grow! Really!" insisted Ryoga.
"Give it a break, Ryoga!" Ranma shouted. "Not all of us are as stupid as YOU!"
"How about I make you eat those—WHUH?!" Ryoga exclaimed as he was lifted up by Soun.
"Ah, welcome back!" beamed the Tendo patriarch. "Sounds like someone needs a BEARD RUB!" And he started rubbing Ryoga's face against his prickly cheeks, ignoring the boy's shouts of protest.
"Owie!" the toddler whined.
Ranma and Kenma chuckled in response…until they saw that Soun was planning to give THEM beard-rubs as well.
"Ow! Hey, cut it out!" the ponytailed tyke complained
"Yee-oicks! Crap-crap-crap!"
"Uh…dad?" said Akane. "They just LOOK like little kids…"
That evening, each boy had their own mushroom planting pot set up and ready to be grown.
"This is great; my mushroom is already growing fast!" smirked Ryoga.
"Uh, why is yourth bigger than mine?" asked Kenma. "Mine should ALWAYTH be bigger! That'th how it USUALLY ith!"
"Hah! I guess there's finally something you can't beat me at!" the little piglet mocked.
"You can make your mushroom ath big ath you want, but it won't make you any better with directionth!" retorted Kenma.
"What's that gotta do with anything?" Ryoga asked.
"Well, ya gotta find a lady if ya wanna pleathe her, and I'm real good at BOTH!" Kenma smirked.
"Ooo, I'm gonna hit you!" said Ryoga, flustered.
"Not if I hit you first, pork chump!" Kenma shot back, putting his fists up.
"That's it! Come here, Monkey boy! I'm gonna thrash you!" the lost boy threatened as he lunged at Kenma, right before catching an elbow to the cheek courtesy of Ranma.
"Tough beanth, rump roatth!" Kenma laughed.
"Hey, shut up! That was a cheap shot!" Ryoga whined while holding his swollen cheek.
"Funny, I got my money's worth." Ranma taunted.
"Haaah! Gotcha!" Kenma laughed, before he and Ranma were taken up by Akane, and put over her knee.
Then it was spankings for both of them. "OW! OOH! EEP! OY! YIPE! AAH! OOF!"
"Shame on you BOTH for picking on Ryoga!" Akane chastised.
"He started it!" the older Saotome brother retorted.
"Itt'th not fair!" Kenma protested. "YOU ALWAYTH TAKE HITH THIDE!"
"I do not!" Akane said.
"Yeth, you do!" Kenma said. "That'th called favoritithm, and you're guilty, bitch!"
Ryoga stuck his tongue out at the two. "Nyaah!" he jeered, before Ranma yanked his bandana down over his eyes. "Waaagh!"
"Serves ya right, ya little pork rind!" sneered Ranma.
"You're gonna pay for that!" Ryoga whined as he pulled his bandana back up.
"The check's in the mail!" Kenma mocked as he and Ranma ran off, with the lost boy in hot pursuit.
Akane picked up the mushrooms and left. "I'd better take one to Nabiki and one to Kasumi—then I'll make it seem like I hid them in my room." she decided.
"Crud! All of that made me forget the topic at hand—the mushrooms!" the ponytailed rugrat reminded himself.
"Yeah!" Kenma agreed. "They're our betth bet at getting back to our proper ageth!"
"Now this might sound crazy, but I think there might still be a few laying around here." Ranma pondered.
"Yeah? How do ya figure?" asked Kenma.
"Well, I figure that Kasumi may have mistaken them for regular mushrooms and put them in the crisper, inside of the fridge." he elaborated.
Kenma rubbed his chin for a few seconds. "That'th a brilliant notion, Ranma!" he exclaimed.
"So what are we waitin' for?" the older Saotome brother urged as he led the way.
"Nuthin', really!" Kenma said as he skipped behind Ranma.
Now inside of the kitchen, Ranma opted to check the fridge first.
"Thee any muthrooms?" Kenma asked as he was bouncing in place behind Ranma.
"Let's see—onions, potatoes, shallots, mushrooms!" Ranma shouted in joy as he held up the mushrooms in his tiny arms. "Over the teeth, past the gums!" He said as he popped it into his mouth.
"Ok, do ya feel any different?" his younger brother asked.
"Not really. And my voice hasn't changed either." Ranma answered.
"Aw, phooey! We got the wrong mushroom!" Kenma groaned in annoyance.
"Well where could they be?" Ranma asked before something came to his head. "Where's Ryoga?"
"Knowing him? Probably in the wrong place at the wrong time!" Kenma responded.
"Or…in Akane's room!" stated Ranma.
"That louthy bum!" Kenma remarked. "He's probably deduthed that the mushrooms are in Akane'th room, and he intendth to get one all for himthelf!"
"We're not gonna let him get anywhere near em', are we?" the elder Saotome brother asked rhetorically.
"Hell no!" Kenma declared. "So LEEEET'S GO!"
Both of them quickly ran to Akane's room to stop Ryoga from keeping the mushrooms all to himself.
Meanwhile, the little pork rind was looking through one of the drawers in said room.
"Come on! They've gotta be here somewhere!" he frustratedly grumbled while rummaging as he threw aside piece after piece of Akane's clothing. To his surprise, he stopped once he came upon one of Akane's bras.
Th-this…this is one of Akane's…b-b-b-b-bras! he squeaked mentally. After recovering from his initial nervousness, he proceeded to fold it up and stuff it into his clothes. She won't miss just one of them…
"Not very gentlemanly of you, Ryoga!" called Ranma's voice in a mocking tone.
"AAH!" Ryoga screamed in surprise before Ranma covered his mouth.
"Pipe down, will ya?!" Kenma commanded. "Besideth, we're after the thame thing anyway."
"How do you know Akane hid them here?" asked Ryoga.
"Just a hunch, really." Ranma admitted.
"Pluth, where elthe would she hide them?" added Kenma.
"Yeah, I guess you've got a point." the little piglet said. "Let's just find em, already."
"That's the idea, Wilbur." the ponytailed toddler stated as he opened another drawer and started searching. " *Gasp* I think I feel something!"
"Ith it a mushroom?" asked Kenma.
"Hang on, lemme pull it out!" Ranma said as he pulled out what was indeed another mushroom. "It is!"
"How big ith it?" asked Kenma.
"Hmmm, just about 18 centimeters, I reckon." his brother answered with a smile.
"Then hurry up an' eat it!" Kenma beseeched. "Before thomething elthe happenth!"
"Ok, down the hatch!" the ponytailed toddler said as he raised the fungus to his mouth, right before Ryoga punched him in the jaw and snatched it for himself. "Gimme that!"
"You thtinkin' rat-fink!" Kenma shouted as he punched Ryoga right back. "You're not gonna athe US outta thith!"
Ranma then poked Ryoga in the eyes. "Ow! You jerk!" the little pork rind exclaimed rather hypocritically before biting Ranma's arm. "Ah!"
Suddenly, Akane entered the room while the kids were fighting "Hey, hey hey! Break it up!" she said as she separated the three.
"Why were you guys fighting this time?" the tomboy asked.
"I found the last mushroom and Ryoga tried to take it!" Ranma explained.
"I should have it because I'm the one who got turned into a kid first!" Ryoga stated.
"Well, I found it first!" Ranma protested with Kenma nodding.
"Alright, I see what's going on." Akane stated. "But there's no need to fight anymore because that's not the last mushroom."
"WHAT?!" exclaimed the boys in shock.
"Nope! Just look at what's on my bedside table," Akane said as she signaled to a bowl with water—filled with several tiny mushrooms.
One by one, each boy's jaw hit the floor.
"Looks like the three of you will just have to wait until they're fully grown. And that means no more fighting." Akane bargained.
At that, all three boys angrily crossed their arms.
"Now all of you shake hands." the tomboy demanded.
The boys then stood up and angrily shook their fists at each other.
"No no, not like that!" Akane said as she took Ranma and Kenma's hands and put them in Ryoga's hands. "Like this!"
This only prompted both brothers to start squeezing Ryoga's hands while the bandana-clad porker screamed out in agony.
K-R-R-RUNCH~!
We then iris out on Ryoga's pained expression, as he screams in agony.
A FEW HOURS LATER…
Using the crawdads that he and Ranma had caught, Kenma decided to make dinner for everyone, in spite of being much shorter than usual.
Out of the fridge, he pulled a carton of eggs, a block of cheese, some milk, and an onion.
He poured in the flour, then mixed in the milk, cracked a couple of eggs and mixed them in until it made pizza dough. Then, he pulled a chunk of dough out and spun it atop his finger until it had doubled in width, diameter, and gotten flatter.
Then, he spread the sauce, grated the cheese, chopped the crawdads and onions, then popped it into the oven, before he repeated the process and made another pizza, which he slipped into the oven and started the timer.
While that was cooking, he took out a couple tubs of ice cream [vanilla, french vanilla, and chocolate chunk], and scooped out some scoops into the blender, following it up with some milk, and an egg before he closed the blender and started it up. At first, it proceeded as normal, until it started to neigh and buck around like a bronco.
Kenma leapt onto it like he was riding a horse. "Whoa! Whoa!" he shouted. "C'mon, whoa already! I said 'whoa'!"
But it still wouldn't comply.
Finally, Kenma had had enough. "When I say 'WHOA'..." he shouted before he began to angrily smack the blender. "...I! MEAN! 'WHOA'! DAMMIT!" he bellowed as he whacked the blender, causing it to finally come to a stop on the kitchen counter.
Once he opened it, he saw the ingredients had blended into a thick, frothy milkshake. He then got some glasses and poured the shake into each of them.
"...there…" he panted. "That…oughta learn it…"
"Dinner will be ready soon, everyone!" Kasumi said as she sat down at the table.
"I don't think Kenma's ever cooked for us before…this should be interesting." Soun said.
"So why couldn't I help?" asked Akane.
"Be reasonable," Ranma said. "We're not lookin' to end up in the E.R."
"Don't make me spank you!" Akane threatened.
"Why? Because you know I'm right?" Ranma retorted.
"Give it a rest, Akane," groused Nabiki as she sat down. "I barely got in a word this episode, and I'm credited in the cast list, so I might as well say something."
[AUTHOR'S NOTE: We humbly apologize, and throw ourselves at your mercy.]
Nabiki mused. "...I'll think about it," she responded. "Anyways, this whole 'Akane-is-in-denial' routine is getting old. If she can't cook, she can't cook, and that's that."
Akane was about to retort, but she decided to drop it because she knew that her sister was right.
"Yo! Dinner is ready!" Kenma called after a few more minutes passed.
"Whoo-hoo!" cheered Ranma, as everyone else came downstairs.
"Boy, am I famished! What are we eatin'?" Jinn asked.
"Crawdad pizza with stir-fried onions, and milkshakes!"
"That sounds wonderful!" Kasumi said.
"Of course I usually prefer Japanese food, but I suppose I could make an exception for tonight," shrugged Soun.
"Don't be such a stick-in-the-mud, Tendo!" Genma remarked. "It might just be delicious! I've heard great things about this 'milkshake'!"
"I'm just excited to taste Kenma's cooking for the first time." stated Nabiki.
Soon, Kenma emerged from the kitchen and placed the two pizzas down in the middle of the table, before serving the milkshake cups.
"There we go!" he declared proudly. "Dinner is served!"
Everyone began taking slices and putting them on their plates. However when Genma reached out to take one, Kenma smacked his hand with a wooden spoon.
THWACK!
"None for you!" he hissed.
"Ohhh….but I'm hungry!" whined Genma.
"Oh, don't worry; there's something JUST for you." Kenma smirked before he plopped something in front of Genma: a plate of bamboo, and a glass of green liquid. "Bamboo shoots and pure kale juice!"
"Dr. Tofu's orders, Pop. And remember, no late-night snacking." Ranma taunted as he proceeded to take a tremendous bite of his slice, marveling at the cheese pull.
"But that's Panda food!" the fat degenerate complained.
"Well, here! This oughta help!" Kenma smirked as he sprayed Genma with a squirt gun, turning him into his panda form. "Eat hearty~!"
As Genma takes a resigned bite of his bamboo, we IRIS IN on his miserable mug…and the IRIS closes!
We've been wanting to do the Mushroom of Time arc for a while as an OVA, so we figured it would be better than yet another Ranma-and-Akane-centered story.
Also, don't worry, loyal readers, the regular story shall resume production soon enough.