Chapter 18

Wesley and Cordelia sat in the office doing research. It was quiet. The three vampires were out on patrol, and Gunn and Fred were on a date.

"Hey, Wesley?" Cordelia's voice broke the silence.

"Yes?" He glanced up from the large tome he was reading to give her his full attention.

"Do you think it's weird that it's not weird that Xander is here?"

Wesley frowned, considering her words. "You mean that we've gotten so used to him?"

She nodded, finally glancing up from the book in front of her.

"Well," Wesley hesitated, trying to find the right words. "No. I don't think so. In many ways, he's still the same Xander. He behaves the same way about a lot of things, including food, even though his food of choice has changed. He has the same ideas, the same thoughts, though perhaps he's more understanding of demons now. And he's not really…"

"Evil," Cordelia finished. "You were going to say that he's not really evil."

"Yes," Wesley said.

"And that's the part I don't understand. Spike was evil. You have to admit it. When we first met Spike, he was Evil. With a capital e."

Wesley nodded in acknowledgement.

"And he could have gone on being Evil. He could have taken Xander away somewhere. Could have taught him to be just as evil. He didn't have to come here, or he didn't have to stay."

Wesley nodded again. "That's true."

"But something happened," Cordelia continued. "And I don't mean the chip." Cordelia knew about the chip now. Wesley had answered all of her questions after he'd let Spike test out his fangs once Willow had removed the chip. "I mean something happened after he came here. I just don't understand it."

Wesley glanced away from Cordelia, then back. "I know what you're saying. It's almost like…he wanted to stay, so he decided to help rather than hurt. Of course, it probably helped that Angel is rather lenient about their feeding tendencies."

Cordelia grimaced, and then chuckled softly. "Yeah. It's strange. That doesn't bother me anymore either. I actually feel safer walking the streets at night. I know that Angel is out there fighting the demons, and that in addition to doing that, Spike and Xander are cleaning up the human evil. It should bother me that they're killing to do it, instead of turning them over to the police, but," she paused for a moment. "Well, it does bother me, but not like it used to. Part of me wishes they'd turn them over to the police, and another part of me is just glad they're making the town safer, no matter how they're doing it."

Wesley agreed. For a former Watcher, he'd surprisingly been the one who had come to terms with it first. Though, perhaps being a former Watcher and having been educated on the customs and behavior of vampires, he'd had less to get used to.

"Is this what has been bothering you the past couple weeks?"

Cordelia's eyes widened in surprise. She'd been sure no one had noticed.

"Yeah. It just hit me that it wasn't weird anymore, and then I realized how weird that was, and…I guess I had trouble handling it."

Wesley smiled gently, and reached over to pat her hand. "Cordelia, if you ever need to talk about something, I'm here."

Cordelia smiled, and reached for his hand just as he began to retract it, grasping it with her own. "Thank you, Wesley."

Wesley's smile stretched across his face. "Anytime."

She released his hand and they returned to their research, a light blush dusting their cheeks.