Chapter 20
"You did what?!" Hunter exclaimed in shock, his eyes widening in disbelief as he stared at Luz. They were standing in the middle of the dimly lit basement. Gus stood next to him, his mouth agape, unable to find the right words to respond after Luz gave them unexpected news.
Luz shifted her weight, feeling the tension in the room rise. The boys' reactions were far from what she was honestly expecting.
"Why would you do that?!" Hunter threw his hands out, his frustration evident.
"Isn't that what you wanted?" she asked, confused as to why Hunter was reacting the way he was.
"I mean, yeah, but…" Hunter let out a frustrated groan and ran his fingers through his hair, trying to calm himself down. He felt a pang of fear and anxiety gnawing at his insides now. "I'm not ready to just… sit with him and work on a puzzle right now," he admitted before he went over to the couch and collapsed there, a hand on his stomach as he felt sick. Oh, great… he felt he wanted to throw up now.
"Luz…" Gus said, shooting Luz a disapproving look. "You should have asked Hunter first, just to make sure he was okay with it."
"I wasn't like trying to go behind his back or something. I was just trying to help him get what he wanted with Belos," Luz defended herself, though mentally she kicked herself for half lying…
"I know you just want to help, but you have to stop doing things without running it with us first," Gus lectured. "Especially if it's going to affect others. You have to stop being reckless."
At first, Luz wanted to argue with Gus, but then she felt slightly guilty as the memories of the countless times she had acted without consulting with her friends first back in the Boiling Isles came crawling into her mind.
She had gotten them into tons of trouble, and not just them, she also got Amity in certain messes and even put her own life at risk.
She wasn't going to lie to herself. She was rather reckless, especially when she let her fears and anxieties make her take certain actions, especially when she wanted to do the right thing.
"Okay, yeah, I'm sorry, I know I can be reckless, but I've got good news," she turned to Hunter, putting up a smile for him. "Belos agreed to work on the puzzle with you."
Hunter slowly glanced at her, his mind slowly processing the words she had just said.
"What…?" he let out, imagining he heard Luz wrong.
"Belos agreed to work on the puzzle with you," Luz said again. "But mom wants you guys to do it after we eat dinner."
Hunter stared at her with a mix of confusion and suspicion. "Belos…agreed to work on the puzzle…. with me…?" he repeated, as if trying to make sense of it.
Luz nodded.
"But… why…?" Hunter asked.
"What do you mean, why?" Luz blinked.
"Why did he agree…?" Hunter clarified. His eyes narrowed as he tried to figure out the situation. "Camila told me before he had outrightly refused when she told him he had to work on the puzzle with me. So why would he agree this time?"
Luz shrugged, a small smile playing at the corner of her lips. "I have my way of words, I guess," she said with amusement, trying to reassure Hunter.
But Hunter wasn't convinced. His gut was telling him that Belos was for sure planning something. Meanwhile, Gus was giving Philip the benefit of doubt and wondered why Philip changed his mind.
"Well, dinner is almost ready, so we should probably head up and join the others," Luz suggested, eager to change the subject.
Hunter bit his lower lip for a moment before finding a grocery bag offered to him by Gus. The bag contained the puzzle pieces. Gus had stuffed them there so his friend wouldn't see the package that contained the picture that the puzzle was supposed to look like; Gus was determined to surprise his friend with how the puzzle would turn out to be.
"You don't have to do it if you aren't ready yet," Gus told him, sensing Hunter's apprehension.
"I know, but…" Hunter took the bag before standing up. "Luz is right. I wanted this. I shouldn't let a chance like this go either, in case Belos changes his mind," he mumbled, still unsure of the situation. "And like humans say, choosers can't be…"
"Beggars can't be choosers," Luz corrected, trying to lighten the mood.
"Right…" Hunter clutched the bag tightly against his chest, a sense of unease settling over him. "I should just go for it."
Luz watched him closely, feeling guilty for putting him in this position. She knew that Hunter had been looking forward to spending time with Belos and been wanting to have a good time with the puzzle, but unfortunately for the boy, she expected Belos to ruin the moment.
She mentally told herself she was doing all this for Hunter's future well-being. The boy was constantly on the fence to either push Belos away or cling to him. Right now, Belos was too exhausted to possibly play his manipulating games with anyone and most likely would lose his temper with Hunter, which would hopefully have Hunter start to realize that Belos wasn't worth fighting for. She was willing to do anything to help the boy see reason, even if it meant putting him in a rough position.
Without another word, she went ahead of them upstairs.
Hunter stopped before taking the first step up the stairs, his magenta eyes fixed on the door with hesitation.
"Am I the only one who thinks nothing is making sense right now?" he asked Gus, his voice barely above a whisper, when Luz was out the door. "Or am I being paranoid?"
"You aren't being paranoid. There is something definitely off with Philip," Gus admitted, his tone serious. "I told you how he was when he woke up earlier today."
"Maybe it's the curse messing with his head," Hunter mumbles, recalling what Gus had told him after visiting the man earlier that day. He couldn't understand why the curse would be acting out if the man was asleep. He felt more nervous that if Belos was losing control randomly now. Cause even if Belos was under an eternal oath to not hurt them, nothing could really stop him if he lost control and attacked them, even if he didn't want to.
He sighed, feeling the weight of the situation settling on his shoulders. He had been hoping to work on the puzzle with Belos when they first thought of it over a week ago, but now…
Gus playfully jabbed his friend's shoulder, snapping him from his thoughts. "Don't worry, man. Maybe we're just overthinking things. And if the curse is in fact messing with him, then we'll figure out how to handle that later," he said. "For now, just do your best to enjoy yourself, okay?"
Hunter swallowed his nerves and nodded, agreeing with Gus. Telling himself for now, he would hold on to the hope that dared slip back into his heart. The same hope that he had held on for so many years to have one of those rare, pleasant moments with his 'uncle' again. Just like the ones he had in his earlier years of life.
Philip lay on his usual spot in front of the couch, his eyes shut, but his mind was far from being at ease. His heart pounded in his chest, his thoughts racing. He kept telling himself all he had to do was work on a puzzle with the boy. That was it. Piece it together with him, nothing more. It sounded simple enough, but the task felt more daunting than when he had made the portal between dimensions.
He struggled to calm his breathing, fighting to keep his racing heart under control. The heavy, dark feeling tugged at the edges of his mind, threatening to pull him under. Time seemed to drag on endlessly as he waited, wishing desperately for sleep to take him and make the waiting bearable.
He wished Camila had just given him the laptop and the list so he could be doing his research instead being in a panicked state.
Finally, he heard footsteps approaching, and he opened his eyes to see Gus motioning for him to follow.
He could just stay there… but… he couldn't help but feel anger towards himself more for avoiding Hunter.
After a whole minute, he finally pulled himself from the floor, his nerves still jangling.
"You doing okay?" Gus decided to ask, noticing how Philip didn't seem angry, but instead looked just hesitant.
Philip didn't respond to him, keeping his eyes on anywhere else in the room rather than on the boy.
Gus sighed, feeling the man was in a way completely shut off from him.
Something for sure must have happened to the man while he was out from the house all those days… Though, Gus couldn't fandom what might have happened.
He was thinking to maybe try and talk to Philip the next day since he didn't want to push him more at the moment and risk making him mad.
After all, the man had a puzzle to work on with Hunter and Gus was going to make sure things went well with that.
The boy walked to the kitchen and Philip followed.
Before the two walked in, everyone was finishing things up in the kitchen.
The table was clean and bare; the dishes washed and put away by the kids. Luz couldn't help but look at her mother with concern when she stored the block of knives inside of the cabinets. Vee and Hunter spread the puzzle pieces on the table, laying a light plywood board in the middle, where the boy would be putting the puzzle together so he and Belos could preserve their progress if they needed to move it.
"Good luck," Willow murmured to Hunter, who gave her a brief nod before focusing on the plywood. He was too nervous to say anything as he sat down on one of the chairs.
The girls walked out of the kitchen, except Luz, who was giving her mother a stubborn look.
"Mija… we talked about this," Camila reminded her as they had talked during dinner, who would stay in the room while Hunter worked on the puzzle with Philip. Luz was determined to stay, but unfortunately for her, her mom wasn't going to budge.
Camila didn't want Luz triggering Philip in any way while he and Hunter worked on the puzzle. From the few interactions that Luz had with Philip, Luz was the one to annoy him the most, which was ironic since he claimed to want to save humans, so Camila had to keep her daugther away.
Gus entered the room, followed by Philip. The man's tired blue eyes surveyed the puzzle pieces scattered on the plywood.
"You can sit here, Philip," Camila said as she pulled out a chair, one across from Hunter.
"You better not pull anything, Belos," Luz said coldly, using the name he had used for so long, the one he didn't like her using on him. To Camila's surprise, Philip didn't react like he usually did with her attempt to anger him with the way she called him. Instead, he clenched his teeth and walked past Luz to take the seat Camila had designated for him.
That lack of reaction from the man was weird for Camila, and she wasn't the only one to notice since Gus was staring at Philip with confusion.
Luz didn't seem to notice anything out of the ordinary and simply sent him a glare before she left the room.
Gus took a seat on the left side of the table, Camila on the right.
"I'm so excited to see a jigsaw puzzle come together for the first time," the boy said, genuinely excited to witness a human game in the works, and also trying to lighten up the mood since Hunter was sitting looking uncertain while Philip sat stiffly. Both were staring down at the table with mixed emotions.
Camila clapped her hands to get everyone's attention, ready to get started. "Alright," she said. "What I usually do to start things off is find the edges and put them together on the plywood first. And work from there."
Hunter hesitated, glancing over at Belos for the first time since he arrived back home.
The first thing he noticed right away was how terrible the man's hair was. It was so tangled, so out of place. He could tell Belos had taken a shower from the looks of the clean clothes that he was wearing and the fact he didn't smell so bad anymore, but… why did the man's hair look like such a mess?
His 'uncle' always took care of his hair… and also kept himself clean shaved but the growing beard and mustache made Hunter question what was in his uncle's mind.
He pulled his attention away from the man's tangled locks before he couldn't help but notice the way Belos was glaring at the puzzle pieces with frustration.
Of course… why would the boy think Belos wanted to be sitting here and work on a human puzzle with him?
He wondered how Luz managed to have the man sit across from him at least, though, the man's annoyed expression made him feel nauseous again, and of course, depressed…
The constant reminder that Belos didn't want to be near him was rather painful…
Hunter began to tell himself the whole thing was a terrible idea. He didn't understand why he kept putting himself in such situations if he knew how things were going to end up.
Well… this time around it wasn't really his fault he was there, but it was Luz's.
Titan… the boy really wished Luz had asked him first…
He was tempted to leave, to end his and Belos' misery, but Camila's encouraging smile and Gus's infectious enthusiasm made him feel bad to just leave like that. He told himself that at least Camila and Gus would enjoy watching him build the puzzle… and he was for sure curious what image Gus had picked for him.
Alright… he told himself it was okay if Belos didn't participate at all. He would just work on the puzzle by himself, and do his best to have fun. He would just act like this was some sort of challenge…
After a few more minutes, he eventually gathered the courage he needed to start collecting the edge pieces and placing them on the plywood.
As the boy began to figure out how to connect all the edge pieces, Philip, from the corner of his eye, could see Camila occasionally give him a stern look, but it wasn't enough to ignite him to join the boy.
He couldn't move a muscle, not while his heart was beating fast against his chest.
And he knew why he was feeling completely anxious.
For years, he had manipulated the boy, hurt him in countless ways, causing the child endless pain. Philip had no idea how to interact with the child without feeling he was going to mess it up.
It was pathetic, really… how terrified he was that he would somehow end up harming the boy if he moved one of his limbs. His fear was justified, though. The green substance was wrapped around half of his body, and the dark presence in his chest and mind still lingered, taunting him as it pulled and pulled.
What if he lost control of the curse and indeed harmed the boy?
'Coward…' the dark voice mocked. 'Always making excuses..'
Claws grew at the ends of his hands before he slowly dug them into his legs, penetrating through the fabric and into his flesh, drawing out blood, using the pain to ground himself as the voice triggered the dark feeling in his chest.
Of course, he had to admit the voice was right. He was just making excuses. The urge to go back to the church and just hide inside that room was a constant thought in his mind, especially now. But avoiding Hunter, avoiding facing the people he has hurt was something he didn't want to do either.
He forced himself to glance at the boy, who looked focused on his task, quickly having the whole edge of the puzzle connected. Hunter was now trying to gather pieces that had a similar color scheme to them, though it was pretty difficult since some pieces had black, blue tones, grey tones, and brown tones mixed.
Without the boy's knowledge, Philip noticed a difference in the boy's appearance. It wasn't just the slightly longer hair, cut neatly around the edges. The boy looked like he had aged a bit, but how was that possible? It only has been over a week since the man had seen the boy.
Well… the real question was… did he ever actually took the time to look at the boy during their time on Earth…? Then again, it has only been several months since they left the Boiling Isles, so there was no way the boy would age that much even then.
Wait… the more Philip looked, the more he realized what had changed in Hunter.
The teen didn't look so pale, so sickly anymore. His face didn't look so thin, and his arms weren't like twigs anymore. There was more meat to him, probably Camila made sure he was fed enough. The dark circles were still present, but not as pronounced as before.
Yes… that was it… the boy looked healthier. Looked more his age than a malnourished child.
'No thanks to you…' the dark voice hissed, making his chest twist painfully. 'Unlike you, Caleb made sure you ate and slept enough…'
Guilt clawed at his chest, making him dig his claws deeper into his legs.
He was painfully aware of how he had neglected Hunter for years, allowing the boy to bear the burden of proving himself without giving him the necessary support. He let the boy continue to push himself so much and, like the terrible monster Philip was, he had simply taken pleasure in the obedience Hunter had shown him.
Philip's gaze drifted to one of the puzzle pieces and he forced himself to relax his tense claws. He told himself he could do this. If the boy was able to endure years of struggling to prove himself to him, then he can make the boy happy by helping him complete the puzzle. Just like he had decided earlier that day.
He wiped the green blood off his pants discreetly while the claws vanished from his fingers and then reached for a nearby puzzle piece. He noticed Hunter tensing up, causing him to hesitate.
Did he just scare the boy just now…?
'You can't trick him…' the dark voice hissed. 'You're doing this to manipulate him, aren't you…?' Philip grew cold at the voice's accusation. 'You want to gain his sympathy by showing him how much you 'changed' and how 'guilty' you feel for everything you have done just so you can avoid being sealed away. But we know the truth… you are still the same manipulative heartless monster… Always planning… always wanting to destroy…'
No… that… wasn't what he was doing… Philip had no intention of playing with the boy's emotions like that ever again.
But… what if he was indeed manipulating the situation… without even realizing it? After all, he had been manipulating people for so long that it had become a habit, something that was so natural to him.
Philip pulled his arm back, trying not to meet the boy's eyes, knowing they probably looked hurt since he was failing to meet the boy's hopes. The hopes that Philip could love him, care for him immensely like a guardian would.
But…
Was it the boy's best interest to have that love from the man…?
Philip didn't deserve Hunter's love, that was for certain, not after everything he has done to him. But if he tried making the boy even slightly happy, it would probably only cause the boy's dedication to him to grow strong again and then lead the boy to suffer in the end when he was later sealed forever.
And the worst part was, Philip could even imagine Hunter doing everything in his power to desperately prevent his 'uncle' from getting taken away from him. Even sacrifice his own life.
'And of course, that's what you want,' the voice said.
No… that's not what he wanted at all… He didn't want Hunter to waste any efforts to help him in any way anymore.
'Then prove it…'
Prove it, the voice said…
Do the right thing….
Do the right thing for Hunter.
Philip had two choices at this moment, and unfortunately both would end up causing Hunter some grief, but… there was one that would cause him less pain in the long run.
A feeling of disgust with himself washed over him as he thought of what his next move would be.
He didn't want to but…
"This… whole thing… is pathetic…" Philip spoke out in a low voice, making everyone turn to him in confusion.
He had to do this…
He had to do it even though he didn't want to.
He forced his eyes to coldly stare at Hunter down through half-lidded eyes. Philip did his best to ignore the pain that was eating him up in his chest, how the guilt threatened to suffocate him.
'Do it!'
With practiced ease, Philip continued to deliver the act he decided to put on, to stick with doing the right thing. "You may look the most like him… but from all the grimwalkers that I've made, you're the most foolish one of them all," he said, managing to sound as cold as he could. "I've always questioned myself why I've kept you for so long, but I guess this is why… Because you are just so good at wanting my approval like a pathetic mutt…"
Camila and Gus gaped at him, their eyes blown wide with disbelief while Hunter's eyes stared at him in shock, his arms slowly pulling away from the table and landed limply on his lap.
The room had fallen deadly silent.
Outside, the wind continued to howl, but it seemed distant and irrelevant compared to the overwhelming silence that had taken hold of the kitchen. For Hunter, every sound, the wind, the ticking of the clock from the living room, have faded away into nothingness.
Camila struggled to pull her thoughts together as the tension of the room grew thicker and more suffocating. She was unable to believe what came out of Philip's mouth. Her heart was boiling with rage, especially towards herself since she was at fault for letting the man, once again, find a way to hurt the boy, for letting him back into the house when she had told herself before she would keep him out.
She has failed as the responsible adult to provide Hunter a safe space again…
She was ready to stand on her feet and tear the man apart as a mama bear would, but then Hunter spoke.
"You're right…" Hunter said quietly. "I am the most foolish one of them all."
Camila and Gus turned to him; eyes wide that he would agree with Belos.
"Mijo, don't listen to him," Camila told him right away, but Hunter looked up at her, giving her a sad smile.
"It's okay, Camila. He's just being honest," he said before glancing up at Belos. "You know, I was going out every morning and every evening either with Gus or Willow, looking for you to bring you back here. I didn't dare miss a day and everyone else would try to keep me from doing my rounds. Majority of the group voted to keep you out of the house, but I didn't care. I didn't listen to them. I wanted to bring you back no matter what, so I kept going and going, looking for you."
Philip listened, his expression remained unchanged, but inside he felt sick that he had let the boy waste his time searching for him while he wallowed in self-pity in a room for all those days.
'You are so selfish…'
"But you don't care, do you?" the boy asked before his eyes narrowed as he spoke. "You don't care how much I've worried about you, how afraid I was for you. You see me as nothing more than a tool to be used, to discard at your whim… You used to be different, you used to care about me… You made sure my tutors treated me well, you made sure I slept and ate enough, you would let me read to you from your library, and you looked at me with pride. But then everything changed when you gave me the staff you made me. You started to strike me when you were angry. You stopped caring about my well-being, you ignored me, and manipulated me. You didn't care how I felt, what I wanted, what I needed… You couldn't stand to listen to me unless it was about some mission…."
Tears welled up in Hunter's eyes as he spoke. The memories of the good memories he had held so dear in his heart slowly overwhelmed by the terrible ones. "You were my hero, my mentor, my father figure. I looked up to you and I wanted to make you proud… but I should have realized sooner how terrible of a man you were. I should have seen the signs, just like the other grimwalkers did, but like you said, I was the most foolish one of them all for expecting better from you."
Hunter brushed his tears away viciously that had dared to escape before he stood up and then, with a sudden burst of fury, he slammed his hands on the table, causing Gus to jump in surprise. "But, I'm done with you, Belos," he hissed, glaring at the man. "I'm done being your mindless, loyal servant. I'm done risking the safety of my friends because of my foolishness for wanting your approval. You killed your own brother and countless others like me. The grimwalkers were basically your children, and you murdered them as if they were nothing!" He snapped with rage. "And the worst part of it all, is that you don't care. You don't care who you've hurt, who you've killed. You're literally a heartless monster… and I realize that now. I'm done holding on to the memories of the two years you were good to me, especially since now that I think about it, they were all probably just a ploy to make sure I became your obedient soldier."
Hunter took a moment to try to calm himself down, doing his best not to break down more from the fact that the first two years of his life were a complete lie. "I'm done feeling sorry for you… I'm done putting you before me and others."
Philip stared at the boy, with no emotion showing across his face, he looked like was just disinterested in what the boy was saying, which made the boy's emotions rile up more, but in reality, he was taking every word in, as they were slowly leaving a mark in his tainted heart.
"I hate you," the boy said, his words heavy with pain and anger, a few tears making their way down his face even though he didn't want them to. "I hate you for making me care about you, for hurting me for so many years, for making me feel like I was nothing, that I was never good enough. You made me think that the only thing that mattered was your approval. But I'm learning now, learning that I do matter, that I don't need your approval to be happy, that there are people that actually care about me."
Camila stared at Hunter sadly, her heart breaking for him. She could see the pain etched on his face, the hurt and anger he had bottled up for so long finally pouring out. "Hunter…" she whispered.
The boy pushed his chair back, turning his back to everyone. "I can't wait to see you sealed away in the Boiling Isles, so I never have to see your face again. I'll make sure you can't hurt anyone ever again. I will protect the people who actually matter in my life and this time, I mean it. I'm done with you," he spat, and with one last scathing look at Belos, Hunter stormed out of the kitchen.
The room was quiet again before Gus quietly got up from his seat, pausing a moment to let Hunter's emotional words echo in his mind. Without sparing a glance at Philip, he walked away in silence, leaving Camila and Philip alone in the kitchen.
Camila took a bit longer to rise from her chair compared to Gus, but once she did, she deftly packed the puzzle pieces into the bag. She picked up the plywood too and assumed that Hunter might not want to look at it for a while, so she retreated to her bedroom with the puzzle to store it there. She then returned with her fully charged tablet and a notepad before placing them on the table while Philip was still there, looking as if nothing mattered, his eyes looking bored.
Camila had the urge to slap him. She wanted to kick him out of the house, to never see him again.
How could a man like him exist? How could he not care, even the slightest for how the boy poured his heart out to him.
Though she knew they needed him to get that portal running. And honestly, there was no point in lecturing him or striking him. The man clearly was never going to learn nor did care to be better. Then she thought that maybe what just happened was a good thing for Hunter.
Yes, the boy was hurting, but now Hunter could move on now after realizing Belos wasn't going to change. Hunter could finally be free to do what he wanted, to stop worrying about someone who didn't matter. He was finally going to stop being dragged down by his abuser.
Belos was never going to change.
"People like him don't change," Luz's words played in her head before Jimmy's as well, "Just like I said, some people can change, but others can't."
Camila did feel hesitated to give up on the man, but he had just displayed that he honestly was just a lost cause.
"This is a tablet," she said without emotion in her voice. "Kind of like a laptop, but simpler. I don't think I have to spend time showing you how to use it since you're a 'smart' guy." She retrieved Philip's documentation from the fridge and set it on the table. "I'm going to let you be, but I suggest that you go back to the living room. I don't want you bothering the kids if they want something from the kitchen," she said, before turning to leave.
Before she could make her exit, she stopped and sighed, shaking her head. "You couldn't just have done one nice thing for Hunter, could you?" she muttered. "But I guess I shouldn't expect anything good from someone like you. After everything you have done… especially after killing so many of your own children… You really are the worst, aren't you?" With those words, she left Philip alone in the kitchen.
He lingered in the kitchen for a while, his chest aching and his mind numb.
He stared at the spot that Hunter was sitting on before he finally stood up to himself and left.
In some way, the boy finally fighting back, put some warmth in his chest. Hunter was better than he ever was, since he never found the courage to do the same against the Minister.
Eventually, Philip gathered everything and slowly made his way to the living room couch, doing his best to not let the emotions distract him.
As he tried to use the tablet, his fingers fumbled at first, but he recognized the familiar Google Chrome icon that the laptop had used to access the internet. Despite the advanced technology of the tablet and the sleek design, he couldn't muster any excitement, weighed down as he was by the heavy guilt and sadness he felt.
Nevertheless, he forced himself to focus on the task at hand, searching for materials that could replace those needed for the portal. But as the hours dragged on, it grew increasingly difficult to keep the faces of the grimwalkers out of his mind, to stop replaying Hunter's words that dug deep. He especially felt his chest twist as he remembered the days when a small Hunter would struggle to pull himself up on a couch with a giant book he had picked from the library. He, himself, would be sitting next to the boy as the boy began to read out loud with such enthusiasm.
Those days… Philip would sit back against the couch and close his eyes, enjoy the moment, enjoy how familiar it was to his own life with Caleb… When he used to read to his older brother by the fireplace.
His teeth clenched, and he fought back tears, unwilling to shed them right now, especially in the house.
He didn't deserve to let his emotions out. He didn't deserve to waste time remembering the days he missed so much, especially since he was the one who murdered the one person who he shared those good memories with.
Philip forced himself to focus, to scroll through the internet, to write down everything he could find in order to complete the portal.
He ignored the agony that was growing in his chest, the pulling in his mind, and the moments he would just blank out as if he ceased to exist in the world…