The Redemption of Ben Skywalker

by AngelofTartarus

Reylo AU. While the fight against Palpatine is over, the war is not finished. The First Order has regrouped and its generals have seized power in the absence of Kylo Ren and are continuing their mission to conquer the galaxy. Rey, Ben, Poe, and Finn must overcome their differences to defeat the First Order once and for all. Pairings: Reylo, Poe/Finn

4. Fish Out of Water

Chapter 4 – Fish Out of Water

---

Ben tried to compose his thoughts as he and Rey walked through the base towards the main clearing which was dominated by the outdoor canteen. Poe had ordered them to wait there until he could rally Ben's guards. Ben's thoughts were racing a mile a minute as he tried to determine the best way to ask for Rey's forgiveness for running off into the jungle. It had been bad form on his part, no matter how much he'd felt the need to be alone. They entered the clearing and sat down on a long wooden bench.

"Rey, I'm sorry I-"

"Ben, I need to-"

Ben paused in his apology as Rey started speaking at the same time.

"Go ahead," Ben urged her.

"No, you go ahead," Rey shook her head.

Ben took in a deep breath. He hoped she would understand.

"I wanted to… apologize for running off," He interlinked his fingers in his lap as he spoke. "It's not that I don't want to try to fit in here, I do, but it's one thing to say I'll try and another to actually do it. I expected everyone to hate me and try to harm me, but I didn't expect it to affect me so much. And with the cuffs on, I'm powerless in ways I haven't been before... ever. I couldn't handle it, so I ran."

"I understand, Ben," Rey laid her hands on his, meeting his gaze strongly. "And you're not the one who needs to apologize, I am."

Ben noticed for the first time that Rey looked extremely guilty and ashamed.

"I should have noticed how you felt, being among your former enemies," Rey shook her head sadly. "I've spent little over a year with these people and we've grown close through all the struggles and strife. We're more like family than friends. I can almost forget the years I spent scavenging desert wastelands for worthless junk and competing for resources with the other scavengers. But that's clearly not the case for you."

"No, I knew quite a few of them before I turned to the dark side," Ben acknowledged, still stunned that she was feeling more guilty about this than him.

"Right, so it must be so hard for you to be here among them again. I should have predicted how you would feel, but I've been so blindsided by my happiness to be with my friends again after Exogol," Rey gazed up at him with remorse in her eyes. "Can you ever forgive me?"

"There's nothing to forgive," Ben said, though he was touched by her concern for him.

Rey breathed a huge sigh of relief and the tension she'd been holding in her shoulders bled away.

"How are you feeling today?" Rey asked, looking over him critically.

"Better," Ben admitted. "None-the-worse for spending the night in the jungle. I'm ready to help the Resistance any way I can."

"Did you really change your mind overnight?" Rey asked with a doubtful expression.

"I almost didn't," Ben said. "But after a pep talk from the ghost of my grandfather, I've gained a new perspective on things."

"Your grandfather?" Rey's eyebrows turned downward as she processed his statement. "You mean... Darth Vader?"

"Yes. Anakin really has a way of convincing people," Ben smirked in remembrance. "I can see where my mother got her fiery spirit. Chewie also gave me a holovid my dad made before... well, that also convinced me I need to stay. I really am resolved to helping the Resistance destroy what's left of the First Order. It will keep you safe... and help atone for my past actions."

"I'm glad to hear that, Ben," Rey smiled happily. "Just know that you're not alone in this. I'll be by your side every step of the way."

"Thanks for not giving up on me," Ben whispered.

"I'll never give up on you," Rey vowed, leaning in close. "I should think everything I've done in the last year proves that."

She pressed her lips to his, her hands coming up to embrace him. Ben went stiff in her arms, overcome with shock at the gesture. Rey pulled back a little, a questioning look in her bright hazel eyes.

"What is it?"

"I'm just... I'm just a little shocked," Ben stuttered out, his brain still short-circuiting from having her so close to him. "First kiss and all."

"What do you mean?" Rey frowned, tilting her head to the side. "We kissed on Exogol after you saved me."

"Did we?"

Ben cast his mind back, but no such memory came forth. He remembered the grueling climb out of the pit and scrambling to Rey to save her. Nothing but a blank after that until he woke up here.

"You must have bumped your head or maybe it was an effect of the drain on your lifeforce from saving me," Rey said with concern.

She ran her fingers through his hair, searching for bumps she might have missed while healing him. It was very distracting and caused all sorts of interesting reactions in him. His gaze focused on her pale, pink lips turned downward in an adorable frown.

"Well, since I don't remember our first kiss, maybe we should recreate it," Ben suggested, his heart beating faster in anticipation.

"Okay," Rey smiled shyly, her cheeks turning red.

She laid her palms on his cheeks and tugged him close. Their lips met in a sweet kiss. Ben was lightheaded with the pleasure of having her so close to him. They pulled back, the puffs of air they were exhaling visible in the cold, morning air.

"What do you think?" Rey smiled mischievously.

"It's nice," Ben smiled as a balloon of happiness welled within him. "Do it again."

Rey chuckled and smashed their mouths together again. The kiss started out slow, just a firm press of the lips, but quickly turned hungry and exploratory. She nibbled at his lips and he gave her access; their tongues danced as they explored each other's mouths and Rey pressed herself closer, molding their bodies together. Ben groaned in pleasure as Rey's hands ventured down his back, exploring his muscles.

"Ahem," Poe's unamused voice cut into their bubble.

Rey squeaked and jumped off his lap; she glared at Poe for startling her. Ben composed himself, pushing away all emotions. He couldn't believe he'd let himself be so vulnerable in public, and in front of Poe, no less.

"If you're quite done, I've smoothed things over with Captain Ivin."

Poe was standing there with an impassive Captain Ivin and the two other guards.

"I thought we agreed you would only post one guard on me at a time," Ben grumbled, pissed off that Poe was already violating their agreement.

"That's still the agreement," Poe affirmed, though he didn't look happy about it. "But I want all three by your side for mealtimes. I don't want a situation like yesterday happening again."

"Fine," Ben grunted. As much as he wanted to forget, he was more defenseless now.

"After first meal, you're going to spend the first half of the day at the medical tent, sorting supplies. After mid-day meal, you'll spend the rest of the day helping our mechanics in the starship yard. If you don't mess up again, I'll consider asking you for information we can use to destroy the First Order. Is that clear?"

"Crystal," Ben muttered.

"Great," Poe replied. "Rey, can I speak with you?"

"Of course," Rey said.

Poe nodded and stalked away, obviously not wanting to be in Ben's presence any longer than necessary. Not that Ben blamed him; he felt the same.

"Don't worry. Today will be different," Rey assured him with a hopeful smile. "Just call me if you need me. Despite the cuffs, our bond is still active."

Ben was grateful that their bond hadn't been completely muted; it was still very much intact, if slightly dampened.

"I will," He promised, though he didn't expect any problems today. He wasn't doubting his ability to stay with the Resistance anymore.

"Okay, I'll see you at mid-day meal."

Rey leaned forward and pecked him on the lips, bringing a smile to Ben's face. She nodded to Captain Ivin and the guards and bounded off after Poe.

Ben and the guards eyed each other silently, waiting for the other to break the silence. Captain Ivin eventually relented.

"I trust we aren't going to have any more problems?" He asked delicately with a warning glance in his eyes.

"What would you do if I did run off again or steal a starship?" Ben challenged him.

The Selonian guard growled at him, baring her teeth as her fur spiked up.

"Sertali," Ivin motioned for her to stand down.

The other guard remained silent but gripped the blaster in his holster tightly. His solemn brown eyes were trained on him, just waiting for him to make another stupid mistake.

Ben sighed. They were off to a great start. He couldn't wait to see how the rest of the day panned out.

-oOoOoOo-

Captain Ivin escorted Ben to the medical tents after they ate. He was miffed that the captain had confiscated his blaster, but it was probably for the best. He was on high alert after all the stink-eyes and mumbled threats he'd gotten; where the hell did they get off on threatening him? Was he really that despicable? Suddenly, his emotions took a lighter turn, becoming calmer. Ben spun around and glared at Ivin. The Zeltron had just used his abilities to influence his emotions! Ivin gazed back with an eyebrow raised, his blue eyes unrepentant.

"Never. Do. That. Again," Ben snarled. If he didn't have these blasted cuffs on, he would have been able to prevent the Zeltron from manipulating his emotions.

"Oh, so you wanted to continue that spiraling downturn into anger and self-pity?" Ivin replied, not at all sorry. "We all saw what happened the last time your emotions took a turn to the negative side. I won't let that happen again. The next time, you might actually hurt someone. You don't want that on your conscience and neither do I."

"You have no idea what you're talking about," Ben said, although he knew Ivin was probably right.

"Keep telling yourself that, Ben."

Ivin started walking again and Ben fell in beside him, still mildly angry at the man.

They walked into the infirmary, which was empty save for Larma and a few medics Ben didn't know. The medics fell silent, looking at Ben with apprehension as he stepped over the threshold.

"Greetings, Commander D'Acy," Ivin greeted Larma with a slight bow. "Mr. Skywalker and I are reporting for duty."

"Mixa, how many times do I have to tell you to call me Larma?" Larma smiled and shook her head good-naturedly as she came over to greet them.

"At least once more, commander," Ivin grinned at her.

"My protégé is incorrigible, even during informal occasions," Larma winked at Ben before turning serious, her eyes laced with concern. "How are you doing, Ben?"

"I'm fine," Ben replied curtly.

"Yes, well, I'm glad that you've returned," Larma said. "I was worried for you."

An awkward silence filled the air. He was so out of practice doing small-talk.

"What task is assigned to us today, commander?" Ivin restarted the conversation.

"I need you both to take inventory of the medical supplies we currently have in stock and make note of what needs to be replenished," Larma explained readily. "I have no doubt we'll be heading into a skirmish with the First Order very soon. We need to be ready for it."

"We'll get right on it," Ivin nodded and headed for the cabinets and bins in an adjoining tent.

Larma caught Ben's arm as he made to follow.

"Let me know if you need anything, okay?" she said earnestly.

"Okay," Ben mumbled, still completely unused to adults caring for him.

He quickly headed over to the other tent where Ivin was already counting the gauze strip packages.

"Here, why don't you start with the laser suture kits?" Ivin handed him a holoreader with the information already pulled up.

Ben searched around for the materials and knelt to count them. An hour passed in silence as they took inventory of the base's medical supplies. Ben was amazed at how much there was. They'd already accounted for hundreds of items and there were still many more boxes to go through. He'd already found a few items that needed to be restocked.

"Making a mess already, Kylo?" An obnoxious voice cut into their space.

They looked up from their work to see Winn standing over them with his arms crossed.

"That's not my name," Ben said stiffly. What was it with this guy?

"Whatever, Kylo," Winn rolled his eyes. "Are you serious, Ivin? You're letting the traitor fiddle with our medical supplies? Has everyone lost their minds? He's probably sabotaged the whole batch by now."

Winn kicked a container with respirators, knocking it into another box with resuscitation devices, spilling the equipment all over the floor.

"Fuck off, Bris," Ivin returned evenly. "You're the one who's making a mess of things. Shouldn't you be over in the fleet yard, pissing Poe off?"

"I'm on my break," Winn said petulantly.

"Well, then go bother someone else," Ivin ordered him. "We're busy."

Winn grumbled and threw Ben a dark look and stalked out, but not before kicking over the container Ben was working on.

"I'm going to kill him," Ben snarled, dark emotions swirling inside him. He didn't even try to suppress it.

"No, you're not," Ivin said calmly, not even blinking at the overtly stated threat.

Ben's murderous rage transformed into calm indifference in the space of a few seconds. He turned to glare at Ivin.

"Stop that," he warned once more.

"Mhmm," Ivin started putting the scattered equipment back into their respective boxes.

After a few moments, Ben stooped to help him.

"You don't seem the type to cuss," Ben said, needing to break the silence yet also curious about Ivin's choice of words.

From what Ben had seen of him so far, Ivin had a firm lock on his emotions. He definitely wouldn't have gotten angry even to swear at Winn, as obnoxious as he was.

"In my experiences dealing with Winn, I've learned he only backs down to people who stand their ground and don't let him bully them," Ivin shrugged, organizing the resuscitation devices into neat rows. "And that usually means using unsavory language. This was a fairly simple custom to adapt to."

"Need some help?"

Ben's head shot up and he frowned as one of his guards who was supposed to be off-duty, Azio or something like that, cleaned up the mess Winn had made near the tent entrance.

"Poe agreed to only give me one babysitter at a time," he growled.

"I like to think I'm more than that. Besides, I'm off-duty," said the brown-eyed guard with a carefree swipe of a hand. "I usually spend my free time down by the lake, but after I escorted Sertali here, I thought I should stick around. Larma is looking frazzled with all this work to be done, so I've volunteered my time."

"Really," Ben muttered in disbelief. That was the lamest fucking excuse he'd ever heard.

"What happened to Sertali, Aarzio?" Ivin asked, looking concerned.

"Nothing major, captain," Sertali said in a throaty voice. She stepped into the room, gingerly holding her tail at an uncharacteristically downward angle. "I think I've sprained my tail. Could you take a look at it? The commander's tests were inconclusive."

"Of course," Ivin jumped up and helped her take a seat on a nearby table.

He gently prodded the furry length and cautiously flexed it a little. Ben eyed her suspiciously as she didn't even wince or cry out. Sertali was looking right at him, so he could tell she wasn't in any pain.

"Ouch," she said in a deadpanned tone.

Ben had to keep from rolling his eyes. And to think he'd thought Aarzio's excuse had been sub-par. The Selonian was clearly faking her injury.

"It looks like you'll be fine," Ivin said professionally, but Ben could detect a hint of laughter in his voice. "Keep the pressure off it for a few days."

"Yes, captain," Sertali nodded. She grabbed a holoreader from the table. "What box are we sorting next?"

"I can't believe this," Ben grumbled darkly. Was this their idea or Poe's?

"The captain has ordered me to stay still and heal," Sertali reasoned as she directed Aarzio to the next container. "There's no reason for me to go to my tent while I'm capable of being useful right here."

"Perfectly reasonable," Ivin nodded in all seriousness.

They stared at Ben, daring him to call them on their bluff. Ben muttered darkly to himself and pulled up another box, this one full of packaged bandage strips. Poe had probably put them up to this to circumvent their agreement. If he complained, Poe would just throw it back in his face that he wasn't technically violating his promise. There was only one guard on duty, and the others had just 'happened' to be close by.

Hours passed as they worked their way through the containers. Ben remained silent and aloof as the others struck up conversations. He tuned it out as he didn't want to take part; he was still angry at them. A bell rang in the distance, signaling mid-day meal was ready.

"Thank goodness," Ben put the lid back on the containers and tossed his holoreader onto the table.

"Oh, good," Sertali said with a toothy smile. "I'm starving. What do you think they've prepared today?"

"You ask that every day, Sertali," Aarzio gave a long-suffering groan. "It's always the same: fried bird and random vegetation they find in the jungle."

"They do check the food we eat for toxins," Ivin said reassuringly as he neatly stacked the containers out of the way. "It's perfectly safe to ingest."

"Whatever," Aarzio griped as he led the way towards the clearing. "I just wish we could eat something else."

They joined the throng of people heading in the same direction. When the closest people noticed Ben's presence, they stepped away, giving him a wide berth. Ben couldn't help but feel sad or ashamed... or something to that effect. He brushed off the emotions before he could really process them. It didn't matter what he thought or felt about the Resistance's reaction to him.

Aarzio turned out to be right about what they'd be served for mid-day meal: fried bird and some thick, crunchy orange leaves and a purple object that looked similar to a sweet pepper. The food servers had almost not given him anything, looking half-petrified when they saw him standing in line before them. One of the young ladies dishing out the vegetables almost passed out when he politely - at least, he'd thought he'd been - asked for a mix of the odd vegetation. His guards were waiting for him as he exited the line. Their trays were filled with different proportions of food. Aarzio's tray was a normal mix of meat and vegetables while Ivin's plate was heaped high with orange and purple. And Sertali... well, her plate was completely devoid of any vegetation. In fact, it looked like she had Ivin's helping of the fried bird and had given him all her vegetables in return.

"Vegetables do not agree with me," Sertali explained as she noticed his odd look at her plate.

Ben smirked before he could help himself. How many times had he used that excuse on his parents while trying to get out of eating some weird-looking vegetable?

"Let's eat," Ivin directed. "We need to report to the shipyard in thirty minutes."

"Oh, that's going to be fun," Aarzio chuckled as he sat down at a half-full table. "I always enjoy getting my ear torn off by the chief."

"Don't be rude," Sertali flicked his ear as she sat down, uncaring of her tail's position. Apparently, it had miraculously recovered. "Baso is the best engineer the Resistance has."

"I didn't say otherwise," Aarzio rubbed his ear soothingly.

Ivin sat down, giving Ben the end of the bench to sit on. He was sort of grateful for that. He didn't think he'd be welcome to sit next to the Resistance fighters sitting opposite of Ivin. The people at the other end of the table eyed him warily as he sat down and started eating. Ben tried not to notice their stares.

"I've lost my appetite," said one of the fighters, an older man with yellow-striped hair. He threw down his utensils and picked up his tray with his scarred hands. "I'm going to go somewhere my stomach won't turn while I eat."

He walked away without a backward glance. As one, the rest of the fighters grabbed their trays and followed him, giving Ben nasty looks as they did. Ben's stomach dropped and he felt slightly sick; he put his fork down and just stared at his plate. Damn these pesky emotions. If he still had access to the Force, he'd be able to closet them in the back of his mind and ignore them forever.

"I thought those dried-up sticks would never leave," Aarzio muttered and put his long legs up to rest on the open bench opposite him. "Don't take their actions to heart, Ben. They're just scared of the First Order."

"So they're scared of me," Ben said.

"Your face was what we pictured when we thought of the First Order," Ivin explained carefully, poking at the fleshy purple ball on his plate. "Among many others, of course, like Hux or Snoke. It'll take them a while, but they'll come around."

"Well, excuse me if I don't hold my breath," Ben muttered as he resumed stuffing pieces of fried bird in his mouth.

It tasted nice, but he barely noticed. He glowered as he ate his meal, cursing all the mistakes he'd made in his life that had led him here.

"Ben!" Rey's chipper voice sounded close by.

Ben put on a smile as she squeezed in between him and Ivin.

"How was your morning?" Rey kissed him on the cheek and looked at him expectantly.

Ben felt his anxiety fade away by the mere proximity of her sunny personality; his smile instantly became less fake.

"It was fine," Ben shrugged. "Sorted boxes."

"Mr. Bris did accost Ben again," Ivin supplied as he chowed down all his vegetables. "I would speak to Poe about it."

"Accost?" Rey's eyes widened in anxiety.

"Ivin is exaggerating," Ben said. "He was just being annoying, knocking over everything."

"I'll speak to Poe about Winn," Rey promised in earnest. "We warned him after he assaulted you and Rose yesterday, but he must think that only applies to physical attacks."

"It's nothing I can't handle," Ben assured her. He'd done it before and he could do it again.

"As much fun as the last time was, I don't think we should encourage another instance," Aarzio said as he polished off his plate. "We don't want everyone thinking they can attack you whenever they want."

Ben grunted and moodily kept eating.

"I'm going running after I check in with Rose about our communications network," Rey said. "Would you like to come along?"

Ben perked up at that; the jungle was peaceful and clear of antagonistic Resistance fighters. It'd be the perfect way to unwind.

"I'm afraid not, commander," Ivin said politely as he checked his watch. "We have less than ten minutes to report to the shipyard. We'll be putting in a full shift and won't be done until final meal."

Ben sighed in disappointment. There was always something, wasn't there?

"Oh, well I can reschedule then," Rey said after a moment of consideration. "How about before final meal then, Ben?"

"Poe didn't say this was allowed in our briefing," Sertali frowned, her lips rising up and baring her sharp teeth.

"Give the guy a break, Sertali," Aarzio huffed. "What's he going to do out there in the wild?"

Sertali growled in response and glared at Ben, evidently remembering how he'd outrun her.

"I'll clear it with the general," Ivin replied diplomatically.

"We're going regardless of what Poe says," Rey interjected vehemently. "If he disapproves, you can tell him he's being a moron."

"Yes, commander," Ivin nodded seriously. He stood up with his tray. "I'll go see him now. Aarzio, can you take Ben to the shipyard?"

"Sure thing, Mixa," Aarzio nodded in the affirmative. "You ready, Ben?"

"Yes," Ben tossed his fork and knife down onto the bird bones.

"I'll see you later," Rey promised, leaning up to give him a kiss.

Ben had to lean down a little to accommodate her. His heart felt lighter as she gave him a quick kiss on the lips. Even the groans of disgust and muttering around him couldn't dampen his rising spirits.

"Alright, let's get going," Aarzio said as he watched them in amusement. "Catch you later, Sertali."

The Selonian grunted at him as she continued devouring the bird meat, picking the bones clean, and cracking them open to suck out the marrow.

Ben followed him as they exited the clearing. He deftly avoided multiple people who tried to trip him as they wound their way through the tables. Some glared at him while others avoided his gaze altogether and parents shielded their children from him. Ben snorted. He didn't have a problem with children unless they got in his way; it was the adults in his life who'd always wronged him.

They made it through the maze of tables, scraped their leftovers into a rubbish bin, and dropped their trays into a bucket of soapy, steaming water. Droids methodically picked up the dirty items and washed them thoroughly.

He quickened his pace to keep up with Aarzio as he walked through the base. Aarzio shoved someone out of the way when it looked like the man was coming to confront him. The guard put his hand on his blaster and glared at the person until they sidled away.

"Why are you so willing to defend me against your friends?" Ben wondered as they continued on their way.

"It's my job," Aarzio replied. "But let's be clear. If I'd met you on the battlefield before now, I would have blown your brains out."

"You would have tried," Ben shot back. With his full abilities, he could stop blaster shots in mid-air.

"And failed. I know," Aarzio rolled his eyes. "In all seriousness, I don't have a problem being on your side because I understand you."

"Really?" Ben said in disbelief. No one could understand him... except maybe Rey and Anakin.

"Really. I lost my family when I was a teenager. That's how the First Order got me to join them," Aarzio explained, his eyes turning sad yet angry at the same time. "I was a pilot for them. It was the only thing that made my life make sense anymore. I defected about a year ago and joined the Resistance."

"Like Finn did," Ben noted. Aarzio's story did resonate with him. Being a leader in the First Order had given his own life some meaning. They had wanted him when his own family and friends hadn't.

"Yeah, but my exit was nothing flashy," Aarzio shrugged. "I was out on a mission and I never went back."

"I'm sure Poe had something to do with Finn's abrupt exit," Ben said with a smirk. "He always had a flair for the dramatics."

The two had taken off without clearance from the hangar with the TIE-fighter still attached to the harness. Ben had been too busy trying to process the stupidity of the pilot and they'd managed to escape.

"It makes for a good story," Aarzio shrugged as they stepped into an area filled with starships of all makes and sizes. "Welcome to the shipyard, also known as Baso's kingdom. The chief rules supreme here... no pun intended."

Ben grunted at the not-so-subtle jab, intentional or not.

"TAM! YOU'RE LATE!" bellowed a female voice from across the shipyard. A short, stout woman dressed in rough-woven clothing covered with dirt and grease stains stomped up to them. She got in Aarzio's face, dragging him down to her level to do so.

"Only by a few minutes, chief," Aarzio replied calmly, not fighting her grip.

"Try five, fly-boy," she retorted. "That's time you'll spend making up at the end of the shift."

"Yes, ma'am," Aarzio quipped back.

"Stop calling me ma'am! I'm not that old," she ordered as she released him. She turned her gaze to Ben and examined him from head to toe. "Who's this and why is he in my shipyard?"

"This is Ben Skywalker. Poe has assigned him to work with the mechanics for the evening shifts," Aarzio introduced him. He gestured grandly to the woman. "Ben, this is Baso Jeps. She's the chief engineer and overlord of all those who step foot in her territory."

"Shut your trap, Tam," Baso snapped at him. She appraised Ben curiously. "Skywalker..." she muttered under her breath.

Ben could tell the moment she realized who he was. Her eyes hardened and her hands curled into fists.

"I see," Baso said. Her jaw shifted as she gritted her teeth.

Ben wondered how close she was to shooting him or ordering him to get out of her sight.

"You better not expect any special treatment here, Skywalker," Baso said curtly. "I don't waste my breath on time-wasters."

"I'm not here to-" Ben started to explain.

"Tam, show him to the engine deconstruction area," Baso cut him off, turning to face Aarzio. "I don't want to see or hear a peep from either of you until those parts are sparkling clean! Understood?"

"Aye-aye, chief," Aarzio nodded.

Baso hmphed and stomped away to yell at some mechanics working on a battered dual engine that looked like it'd seen better days.

"That went well," Aarzio exhaled in relief.

"We must have different definitions of well," Ben muttered.

"It counts as a win if she doesn't kill you right off the bat," Aarzio shrugged and tugged him towards the other end of the fleet.

He stopped when they reached boxes and boxes of engine parts packed with grime and covered in dust.

"Let's get to it," Aarzio said brightly. He handed Ben a pristine cloth and a spray bottle filled with amber liquid.

"We have to clean all of these?" Ben asked, aghast. "In just a few hours?"

"Yes, or Baso will have our balls," Aarzio nodded, completely serious.

He took a gear with metal spikes out of the pile and sprayed it with the liquid. The dirt and grime came off the part as he wiped it with the cloth.

"We clean and sort at the same time. Put the good parts into one bin and the damaged parts into another," Aarzio explained, showing the damaged gear part to Ben before tossing it into a box marked 'Fix These'. "You might want to take off your jacket." He nodded towards Ben's top layer. "This job can get pretty messy."

Ben sighed and shrugged off the leather jacket. He placed it on top of a nearby container they wouldn't be using and sat on the ground and got to cleaning. Minutes passed as they sprayed the different parts and sorted them. Soon, their rags turned black from all the grime they'd taken off. Some of the mess had even gotten on Ben's clothes as Aarzio had warned; thankfully, he was wearing mostly black so it didn't show up as much. At least the engine parts looked serviceable again afterward. Some of the items were entirely caked with rust, mostly the nuts and bolts. Aarzio directed him to toss those parts into a small bin filled with clear water. Ben dropped a bunch of them into the bin and yelped as the liquid splashed up and landed on him, burning and sizzling; that was definitely not water! His skin itched and red splotches formed all over his forearms.

"Careful," Aarzio snorted in amusement. "You don't want that stuff getting on you. It's good for metal, not so much for anything organic."

"You could have said something," Ben growled at him as he wiped the droplets off with a rag.

"None of the newbies believe the veteran mechanics when it's explained to them," Aarzio explained before Ben's temper could explode. "They usually dunk their hands in it or try to drink it. I'm just saving you the embarrassment of doing that in front of the chief."

"Thanks," Ben replied sarcastically.

"No problem," Aarzio smiled brightly and threw more rusted parts into the bin.

Ben jumped back as more droplets splattered everywhere. The grass beneath the container hissed as the liquid hit it. Ben muttered insults under his breath as he sat back down and continued cleaning and sorting through his pile.

"Introduce him to the sparkling water yet?" Ivin's even-toned voice asked as he stepped around a Z-95 Headhunter and came into view.

"He discovered it himself, Mixa," Aarzio said innocently.

"Aarzio," Ivin sighed. "You're supposed to inform new recruits about the diluted acid mix we use to clean engine parts faster."

"And I did," Aarzio claimed.

"I'm sure," Ivin rolled his eyes. "How are you faring, Ben? Have you met Baso yet?"

"Yes," Ben said.

"She barely spoke a word to him," Aarzio reported as he placed some coiled wires into the 'Use These' bin. "Didn't raise her voice or order him around."

"I didn't expect anything less," Ivin stated, but he looked slightly worried. "I'm sure she'll come around. She usually does."

"It took her six months with me," Aarzio supplied. "What are you doing here, anyway?"

"I came to check up on you two before I went on my break," Ivin rolled up his sleeves and picked up a rag and a spray bottle; he sat down next to Ben and grabbed a fuel injection nozzle. "But I think I'll stick around and help out. Baso probably wants these engine parts cleaned before sundown."

"You guessed it right in one," Aarzio nodded.

"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!"

Everyone jumped as Baso's voice rang throughout the fleet; even halfway across the shipyard, she was perfectly capable of making herself heard. Ben saw some mechanics maintaining a nearby starship scuttle away to take cover.

"DOES THAT LOOK LIKE THE FUCKING SPARK PLUG?!"

Sertali raced into the engine deconstruction area to join Ben and the two guards, her tail whipping back and forth.

"Who is she ripping into now?" Ivin asked the excited Selonian, not at all surprised to see her.

"One of the new recruits, Ayanin Yala," Sertali supplied. She reached into her belt and grabbed some small, rectangular bronze bars from a pouch. "I'll bet ten creds it goes on for another five minutes until the poor girl runs out of here crying."

"I DON'T CARE IF THAT'S WHAT YOU USED TO DO ON MANAAN!"

"I say it takes less than three minutes," Aarzio tossed his own ten credits onto the pile in the grass.

"Are you seriously betting on this?" Ben asked incredulously.

"Baso does this almost every day," Ivin shrugged and placed his ten credits on top of the others. "I say three minutes, but Yala stands her ground."

"Bold choice," Aarzio complimented him as he tossed a rusted bowl-shaped disk into the acid. A white cloud spewed out of the bin as the part soaked in the liquid.

"ARE YOU FUCKING CHALLENGING MY ORDERS?!"

"Oooh, you might just be right, Mixa," Aarzio craned his head towards the loud confrontation, but the starships blocked everything from sight.

"I usually am," Ivin replied modestly, rubbing grime off of a particularly dirty nozzle.

"What usually happens when Baso starts yelling at someone like this?" Ben couldn't help joining in; the energy was intoxicating and the focus was off of him.

"Well, the last time Baso got this mad, she almost castrated the poor fellow. She actually grabbed some cable cutters and chased him around," Aarzio said, his lips pursing as he tried to recall the incident. "I think it was Bosh who fucked up, right?"

"No, it was one of the younger mechanics," Ivin corrected him.

"It was Jecob Wyan," Sertali remembered fondly. "He mixed up the hypermatter mixes and tried to put the unrefined batch into the engine tanks. He could have blown up the fleet."

"THIS IS MY SHIPYARD AND YOU'LL FOLLOW MY INSTRUCTIONS!"

"What's Baso's plan this time?" Ben asked, starting to smile at the friendly banter. "She can't exactly castrate Yala."

"You underestimate Baso's rage," Sertali said sagely. "Where there's a will, there's a way."

"Baso is capable of a lot of things when she's angry," Ivin agreed. "Though in this case, I believe it'd be more in a spiritual sense."

"GET BACK TO WORK AND DON'T LET IT HAPPEN AGAIN!"

"Oh, I think it's ended," Aarzio perked up and checked his watch. "Approximately three minutes. Sorry, Sertali. What about Yala?"

Sertali's ears shifted to point in the direction all the shouting had taken place. "I don't hear any crying or running. Yala survived."

"We should really stop betting against each other," Aarzio sighed, pushing the thirty creds over to the victorious captain. "Mixa always wins."

"That's because I always pick the most boring outcome," Ivin smiled as he slid the money into the pouch on his waist.

"Well, one can wish for a little excitement," Aarzio muttered.

Footsteps sounded outside their little bubble, loud stomping ones.

"Oh, fuck," Aarzio cursed and lunged for a bin. He took out a large cone flaked with black specks and furiously scrubbed at it.

Baso appeared between the starships with a murderous expression on her face. Her muscles rippled under her shirt as she clenched and unclenched her fists. Her gaze narrowed in on Sertali sitting with them.

"Hils! What are you doing?" Baso barked at the Selonian. "You're supposed to be reassembling the Kayzian interceptor cores, not cavorting with your friends!"

"I was just on my way back to it, chief," Sertali rose gracefully and ran off.

"Run faster!" Baso yelled after her as Sertali's tail disappeared around a starship. "It's not going to assemble itself!"

She grumbled to herself and turned back to grill new victims. Ben swallowed hard as she stomped over to stand above him. She was no Snoke or Palpatine, but she was formidable in her own right.

"WHAT'S THIS, SKYWALKER?" Baso bellowed in his ear, making it ring. She jabbed a finger at the half-clean gyroscope in his lap; he'd stopped working on it when she'd started yelling at Yala. "THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!"

"I'm still working on it," Ben clenched his fists, trying to keep his hackles down. He didn't want to start yelling at the woman. They might end up killing each other.

"WELL WORK HARDER!" Baso demanded. "I WAS SERIOUS WHEN I SAID I WANTED THIS ALL DONE TODAY!"

She walked off without waiting for a response, glaring at all of them as she disappeared between an X-wing and the Headhunter.

"Good job, Ben," Ivin complimented him.

Ben whipped his head around and stared at Ivin incredulously.

"For what?"

He couldn't fathom what he'd done to earn that.

"For not losing your temper with Baso," Ivin replied as he sedately cleaned another part. "You actively pushed away your impulse to rise to her taunting. That's progress."

"If you say so," Ben shrugged and chucked the newly cleaned part into the 'Fix These' bin.

He turned his gaze to the containers and almost groaned at the contents. They were still full of dirty engine parts. Had they cleaned anything? He looked in distaste at the black and brown sludge covering the lower layers.

"Can't we just dump all of this into the acid?" Ben pleaded with his guards.

"Sparkling water doesn't work on grime and dirt, just rust," Aarzio shook his head. He grabbed a part dripping with black sludge and waved it at Ben. "How do you think this got covered in guck? Some moron tossed a bunch of parts into the acid thinking it would help. And now we have to deal with it."

"It could be worse," Ivin said as he delicately picked out the small bolts, nuts, and washers and placed them on his rag. "You could be doing this alone."

Ben exhaled through his nostrils, swallowing words he knew he'd regret. He gamely grabbed a part and got to work, wrinkling his nose at the putrid odor emanating from it. Why had he agreed to this again?

-oOoOoOo-

The sun was low on the horizon and Ben was tired and getting pissed off. His hands were raw and sore from all the cleaning he'd done; the healing paste covering them helped a little, but not much. Ben wasn't used to doing manual labor anymore. He'd forgotten how much he hated it.

Baso had kept her promise and made them stay an extra five minutes after the shift ended, ignoring Aarzio's mock groans and complaints. She'd let them leave after exactly five minutes. Their stomachs were rumbling as they entered the canteen, which was bustling with Resistance fighters catching up and laughing at each other's jokes.

Ivin took the lead as they got in line to receive food and Aarzio stood behind him. Ben glared at the people who dared to jeer at him as he passed. It was becoming quite the norm. The food servers were the same ones from mid-day meal. The young woman from before didn't pass out, but it was a close call. She squeaked and her angelic green eyes grew huge as she swayed in place; her fellow server nudged her and told her to concentrate. She listened to him and carefully inched her ladle toward Ben to shakily give him a helping of some springy, helical leaves drenched in cooking oil. He thanked her, ignoring the whimper, and walked on to get a serving of bird, roasted instead of fried this time; it must be the only thing they could catch here. He and Ivin waited for Aarzio, who was flirting with the male server. Ben stared at the guard, urging him to hurry up; he was starving.

"Tam, we're waiting for you," Ivin called, his voice uncharacteristically tense.

Ben gave him a side glance; Ivin's mouth was a straight line and his eyes glinted with something dark. Was that jealousy? His complexion was turning steadily a darker red by the second, reflecting his mood.

Aarzio gave a pout and winked at the server before sashaying towards them. "I'm coming, captain."

He passed Ivin and Ben saw his lips upturn slightly and his eyes light up in triumph. Looks like they had a crush on each other.

The men sat down at a half-empty table and like earlier that day, the Resistance fighters looked at Ben with fear and disgust and stood as one and walked to another table nearby. Ben picked at his food, determined to not let that affect him. He hadn't wanted to sit with them either. They ate their meals in silence, a juxtaposition to the dull roar of the Resistance conversing with each other. A half-hour later, everyone had finished eating, but no one was leaving just yet. Then the loud din quieted and Ben looked around to see the cause. Everyone was staring at a young woman climbing atop a table. It was Rose.

"Hello, everyone," she greeted everyone cheerily. "I hope everyone had a productive day. I'll be leading the daily report today."

"Where's Poe?!" interrupted a brown-eyed young man with spiky hair.

Ben recognized him from somewhere; ah yes, he'd been one of his guards the first day. Captain Gser had called him Jecob. So this must be Jecob Wyan, the moron who'd almost blown up the Resistance fleet.

"WYAN!" Baso's voice blasted through the air, confirming Ben's theory. "COMMANDER TICO IS SPEAKING! SHOW HER YOUR RESPECT BY SHUTTING YOUR TRAP!"

"Thank you, Baso," Rose said, giving the chief a slight smile. "To answer your question, Wyan, Poe is currently on a mission. He's directed me to lead the daily Resistance report today."

Ben narrowed his eyes at that. Poe had gone on a mission. He scanned the assembled crowd and noticed Finn and Rey were missing too. Had Poe dragged them along?

"We've received reports confirming that the First Order will be attacking the Venjagga system by next week. One of their generals will be leading a single star destroyer in the attack, but we still don't know who that person is yet," Rose said clinically, as if reporting on the weather. "Our goal is to intercept the destroyer before it reaches Venjagga, keeping the fight contained while we evacuate the planets. We will be deploying half of the pilots from this base; they will join forces with pilots from our sister bases on Taris and Iridonia."

"Will Poe be leading us?" asked a middle-aged human. Her face was scarred on one side and her posture was textbook military.

"General Dameron has been tasked with heading another important mission," Rose explained, eliciting a mixture of disappointed groans and small cries of protest. "General Antilles will be leading our forces to stop this attack along with Commander Chewbacca."

Chewie gave a short bark, confirming Rose's statement. Everyone quieted down, content for the most part.

"Commander Chewbacca will be compiling the roster of pilots and fighters who will be taking part," Rose continued. "If you want to put your name forward beforehand, notify him by tomorrow," She turned to direct her next words to Baso. "Chief, what is the status of our starfighters? What do you need to be ready to deploy forty pilots in four days?"

"We're repairing starfighters as fast as we can. We took a real hit at Exogol," Baso stood up so everyone could see her.

Ben stiffened his spine as the people surrounding him turned to glare at him. What the hell? He hadn't been controlling the First Order forces at Exogol.

"I can have thirty-five starfighters ready by then," Baso said. "But if you want bombers, we won't make that deadline."

"One of our sister bases will be supplying the bombers," Rose referenced her reader, nodding to herself that the information was correct. "What do you need to make an extra five starfighters battle-ready?"

"I need more manpower," Baso affirmed, crossing her arms. "There's work to be done, but few to tackle it."

"I'll rearrange the work rosters for the next week," Rose promised, making a note in her reader. "You'll have what you need to get the work done. Next order of business, medical supplies. Commander D'Acy, any updates?"

Larma stood, her blonde hair dancing along her shoulders. "We're taking inventory and as of now, we have a shortage of splints and bacta gels. I'll be able to give you more information within the next few days."

Rose nodded, typing that down. "Commander Trodun, what's the status on the comms systems?"

"We're 100% operational," Mosla Trodun reported. Her eerily black eyes surveyed the gathered crowd, making some gulp nervously. "We have a transmission lock with our sister bases and we're getting consistent reports from our people about the First Order's movements. We do have equipment that needs to be updated, but none that are time-critical."

"Thank you, commander," Rose made another note in her reader, her eyebrows turning slightly downward.

Equipment that wasn't regularly updated and maintained could eventually fail, and one wouldn't know about it until it was too late.

"Captain Gser, do you have anything to report for your area?"

The woman sitting beside Larma stood up. Her black hair was pinned up into a strict bun and her demeanor screamed of professionalism.

"Yes, commander. I've spoken with Commander Finn and we'd like to re-institute a training schedule within the week," Gser said as she laced her fingers behind her back. "We need to keep up our skills as we're continuing our fight with the First Order. I believe our fighters would benefit from starting with target practice."

"I'll carve time out in the work rosters to accommodate that," Rose said. "Does anyone have anything they'd like to escalate?"

At the next table over from Ben, Winn Bris stood up angrily.

"Yeah, I have something I want to escalate!" Winn jabbed a finger in Ben's direction. "I want to know why we're allowing the traitor - FUCK, THAT HURT!" He shouted as Aarzio kicked him hard in the shin. Clutching the affected area, Winn collapsed back into his seat, muttering obscenities.

"I realize everyone has complaints about Ben's presence here at the base," Rose said and everyone mumbled in agreement. "And with good reason, but the Resistance leadership has agreed that he's traded sides and they're willing to give him a chance to prove himself. If anyone has a legitimate complaint, we will hear it. Does anyone else have anything they'd like to escalate?"

The Resistance fighter grumbled and some shot a side-eye glance at Ben, but no one else came forward.

"Alright, thank you for your attention," Rose said with a tense smile. "The coming days will be dark, but we will beat back the First Order again. As long as we trust each other and go at it together, we will prevail."

Chewbacca gave a loud roar of approval, causing the fighters to join with a cheer and claps of approval. Rose hopped off the table as everyone stood up; some people mingled while others headed off, likely to sleep after a long day of work. Rose's small figure wound through the throng of people, heading for Ben's table. She sat down across from him with an apologetic expression.

"Hello, Ben," She greeted him. "How was your day?"

"Busy," Ben returned curtly, wanting to get straight to the point. "Did Poe take Rey with him on the mission?"

"Yes. Rey and Finn joined him," Rose nodded. "We received intel at noon and we had to jump quickly on it."

"Where did they go?" Ben questioned. No doubt, it was somewhere incredibly dangerous.

"I can't go into details, but they won't be back until dawn at the earliest," Rose said, looking away. "Rey asked me to tell you that she's sorry she won't be able to go running with you tonight."

"I understand," Ben muttered, but he was helpless to stop the anger and disappointment from swelling up within him.

Rose's comlink beeped at her; she looked at the transmission signature and stood.

"I need to take this," She explained. "I'll see you tomorrow, Ben."

"Goodbye," Ben said as she walked away.

Something dark simmered in him that he tried to shy away from, but it wasn't quite working.

"Come on, I have something I want to show you," Ivin said suddenly, hoisting Ben from the bench.

"Not interested," Ben muttered, wanting to be left alone.

"I think you'll like it," Ivin insisted, dragging him along and disposing of their trays along the way.

Aarzio and Sertali followed close on their heels. At the edge of the canteen, Chewie intercepted them and let out a few soft barks, asking Ben how he was doing.

"Not too bad," Ben answered truthfully. He could contain himself; these dark urges weren't anything he hadn't handled before. But... he'd had his Force abilities then to suppress them.

Chewie eyed his stiff stance and clenched fists dubiously. The Wookiee stepped forward and tugged Ben into a firm hug. He warbled, saying that Rey was going to be fine and would be back soon; she'd gone on hundreds of missions like this before.

"I'm not worried about her," Ben tried to lie convincingly. It was partially true, but he was more worried about how he felt without her by his side.

Chewie huffed in laughter and barked a question at Ivin, asking where they were going. Ben's tent was in the opposite direction.

"I thought we could show Ben the lightning tree," Ivin said earnestly. "I think it will help in the long run."

Chewie grunted, saying that was a good idea. He ruffled Ben's shorn hair and told him to come to him if anyone gave him a hard time. He'd straighten them out.

"Thanks," Ben smiled, the stress easing a little.

Chewie watched them walk off towards the jungle tree line. Ben wondered what this 'lightning tree' was and why it was important he see it. As they passed through the weapons training area, Ivin grabbed a worn silver quarterstaff from a pile. Ben grew tense again as they entered the jungle and walked through the heavy underbrush. Were they planning on whacking him here and leaving him for the wildlife to devour?

"Stop worrying," Ivin reprimanded him with a frown. "You're making me feel antsy too."

"Well, you haven't told me what we're doing here," Ben retorted, unrepentant. If Ivin didn't like feeling his emotions, then he could piss off.

"Trust us, you'll like it," Aarzio said with a hint of a smile.

"Unlikely," Ben muttered under his breath as they continued their hike through the jungle.

The sun was still visible through the trees, but its light was waning; it would set in a couple of hours. Finally, they entered a small clearing; the area was starkly different from the surrounding jungle. The vegetation was half-dead and there were stumps of trees. The tree at the center of the clearing was still standing, though it was one-third the size of the surrounding trees. The top was jagged and the wood was burned as if the top two-thirds had been blown off. What was left of the ancient tree was its base, some ten feet tall and several feet wide; it was gray with black streaks and most of the bark had been sheared off. What was odd was the tree was battered with blaster rounds and indents.

"This is the lightning tree," Ivin explained, waving a hand at it. "Lightning struck this area a few months after we set up the base here. The proximity of it fried some of our equipment and knocked out the comms system; it took us a few weeks to fix the damage. The tree died when it got hit, leaving what you see before you. We come here when we need to let off some steam."

Ben raised an eyebrow at him. What was the point of showing him this?

Ivin sighed and looked him straight in the eye. "Ben, I'll be frank. I don't like what I'm sensing from you and I'm not confident in my abilities to suppress it. I'm not Force-sensitive and I don't pretend to be. I think my messing around with your darker emotions would actually make it worse and you may end up hurting one of us. I want you to release those emotions in a slightly more healthy way."

The captain extended the quarterstaff, silently asking him to take it. Ben gingerly took the weapon and stared at the three guards, wondering if this was a trick.

"Hit the tree, Ben," Aarzio said with a long-suffering sigh. "I don't want to deal with you when you're in a funk."

"This is stupid," Ben protested as Sertali nudged him towards the dead tree. "I don't need this."

"I think you do," Ivin said honestly and crossed his arms.

Ben sighed and half-heartedly swung the quarterstaff at the tree base. It landed with a soft thunk and didn't even make a dent. He usually didn't try to destroy something until he was really mad, like when Rey had escaped his clutches or when Snoke had told him his mask was stupid. He swung a little harder at the dense wood and dark emotions welled within him. He tried to push it back like always, but thinking about all the verbal abuse and heated looks he'd sustained that day coupled with not being able to spend quality time with Rey tonight made the emotions boil over. He started taking true swings at the tree, channeling the darkness into it. He tried to focus his swings using the Force, but as he tried to clutch a mental hand around the energy, it slipped from his grasp. No matter how many times he tried, he failed. It was the cuffs; that made him angrier than anything else and he shouted in frustration as he snapped the quarterstaff into one section of the tree as hard as he could. The strong blows created slight welts. Ben redoubled his efforts, whacking the tree and letting his emotions rage; pieces of dead, gray bark broke off under his assault as he tried to hack his way through the tree.

Eventually, he had to stop to catch his breath; he heaved in huge gasps of air and suddenly registered the soreness in his muscles. His hands shook a little from holding the heavy quarterstaff and he felt extremely fatigued. The sunlight had decreased significantly, but he could still see the tree well enough to survey the deep welts he'd carved into the tree; he hadn't thought he'd been that angry, but apparently he had been. At least he wasn't feeling incandescently angry anymore though, so that was a plus.

"Stars above," Sertali said behind him.

Ben turned to face his guards and they were all sporting some mix of surprise and fear. Aarzio's mouth was hanging open as he looked at him in awe.

"Holy shit, Ben," Aarzio laughed shakily. "What do you do when you are angry?"

Ben shrugged, willing his heart rate to come down. He shivered as the wind raced through the trees and cooled the sweat on his skin.

"Well, I think this system will work in the future," Ivin said. "Why don't we head back?"

Ben nodded and stepped towards them; all three stiffened and Aarzio's hand made an aborted move for his blaster. Ben had to suppress the urge to roll his eyes. Of the people at the base, these three were low on the list of people he wanted to whack. He tossed the quarterstaff to Ivin and they all headed back into the camp.

The captain made a salute to the guard in the scout tower as they crossed the boundary. The man saluted back and gave them a nod. Ben hoped he wasn't the same person who'd dozed off while he'd snuck back into the base early that morning. Ivin escorted him to his tent and told him that they would be taking shifts to guard him throughout the night. Ben couldn't care less as long as they let him sleep. He ducked inside his tent and had to hunch so his head wouldn't hit the fabric roof. The tent had a standard mattress for field operations, that is to say, it was serviceable, but not exactly comfortable. There was also a worn brown blanket; it was thick and warm but had scraggly threads on the edges. He took off his leather jacket and folded it in half to serve as a pillow. He wrapped the blanket around himself to block out the chill creeping into the camp and tried to put all thoughts of Rey and his worry for her safety out of his head. He needed his rest to face tomorrow; he had a feeling it was going to be a lot like today.

-oOoOoOo-

"You're a disappointment, Ben," Luke stared down at him, his face contorted in disgust. "I trained you better than this."

"What do you mean, uncle?" Ben pleaded desperately. "I've done everything you've asked of me. Isn't that enough?"

"If you had done what I asked of you, I wouldn't be faced with your failure," Luke shook his head and walked away. "Training you is my biggest regret."

"Please give me another chance! Tell me what I did wrong," Ben tried to keep pace with him, but the distance between him and Luke kept increasing. "I will be the best Jedi you've ever trained if you just give me a chance!"

"I wanted you to be good, but you never will be," Luke's voice grew distant.

"But I am good!" Ben shouted, running to catch up. "Uncle, please!"

He reached his uncle and turned him around, but it wasn't Luke he saw. The man was older and his face was heavily scarred and disfigured and his hair was almost entirely gray. It was his former mentor, Ren.

"If you're good, then why did I sense the dark side was so strong within you?" Ren asked. "Why did you destroy the Jedi Temple and join me?"

"I… I," Ben stuttered as he stumbled backward.

"Snoke said you had potential and I believed that. I thought you would be a valuable asset to the Knights of Ren," Ren stalked forward, drawing his lightsaber. "But we were both wrong. The events on Mimban proved that. You haven't changed from that pathetic boy who followed Luke Skywalker blindly."

"You're wrong about that," Ben shouted at him.

"You're trash and you will always be trash," Ren snarled at him and ignited the lightsaber. The red blade glowed ominously as he pointed it at Ben. "I was born out of the flames," Ren intoned gravely. "But you… you will die by the flames."

Ren drew his hand back and threw the lightsaber at Ben. As it left his grip, the kill switch activated and it exploded in Ben's face. Ben screamed as shards of metal were embedded in his skin and fire scorched his face.

As he felt himself disintegrating, black smoke swirled up and enveloped him. He choked and fell to his knees as the blackness covered him. He tried to get a hold of himself; this was a dream, it had to be. Ren had been dead for years. And yet, Ren's words were like daggers he could not avoid; they were echoes of doubts he'd had himself over the years.

No! His former mentor was wrong. He had changed since his teenage years and become wiser. The path he'd taken had been more like a maze than a straight line, but he'd found what he was meant to do and a cause he truly wanted to fight for. He was good now.

"Being good is for weaklings," said a hoarse, rough voice. "It requires you to give yourself and receive nothing in return."

Ben looked up to see Snoke gazing down at him atop an oversized throne. His disfigured face was filled with hatred and contempt as he pointed a long finger at Ben.

"I tried to crush the weakness from your puny body, but I failed. You let her corrupt you and now you will pay the price."

Ben screamed as Snoke used his power to torture him. His insides screamed for mercy as they were twisted and stabbed. He felt like he was being pulled apart and then seamlessly put back together, only for the whole process to start over again. He stayed strong, determined to ride it out. Snoke was wrong; being good wasn't a weakness.

"You are strong to resist," Snoke whispered, lowering his finger. "Yet foolish to do so."

Ben choked and coughed on the cold ground as Snoke curled his fingers together. He looked up at the man in resentment as he tried to sit up.

"Perhaps a stronger lesson is needed," Snoke pondered the possibilities and then waved his hand.

Ben whimpered as Rey materialized into existence, her body weighed down with glowing chains. She had black metallic bands around her wrists that were painfully digging into her skin.

"Don't you dare touch her!" Ben gasped out as he forced himself to move his tortured limbs to help Rey.

"Why shouldn't I punish the one who tried to engineer my demise?"

Snoke's hoarse voice shifted into a deep, silky baritone with a slight echo. Ben looked up in time to see the horrifying transformation of Snoke's figure melting into Palpatine. The Sith Lord stood strong and tall, his terrible face visible under the black hood. He raised his hands to Rey and white lightning snapped out and struck her.

"NO!" Ben shouted as Rey started screaming incoherently.

He reached out with the Force to help her but felt nothing. He couldn't feel the Force. That wasn't right! He'd always been able to connect to the vast energy before. The emptiness he felt was appalling. He moved to attack Palpatine, but the evil Sith merely laughed. Glowing chains sprang into existence and weighed Ben down, forcing him to crash into the floor.

"I had plans for both of you," Palpatine said as he lowered his hands.

Rey groaned as the lightning was lifted; smoke rose from her body and her eyes were rolled back in her head.

"I foresaw a glorious future for us," Palpatine hissed as he approached Ben. Rey's body lifted into the air and followed him. "With the heir apparent to my old apprentice and my granddaughter at my side, we could have brought the empire to new heights. We could have shaped the cosmos to our will!"

Rey crashed in a heap a few feet away from Ben. He reached out to her, but he was held immobile by the chains. Rey's eyes rolled back into a normal position and regained their clarity; she reached out to Ben weakly.

"Ben?" she whispered hoarsely, her hazel eyes filled with fear. "Help me."

"But you lacked the vision to bring that future into reality, choosing each other instead," Palpatine growled and shook his head in disgust. "You put your faith into each other and now you will know the price of defying me."

Lightning arced from his hands and struck the two of them. Ben screamed and writhed in agony as his organs felt like they were being lit on fire. His nerves protested at the amount of energy coursing through them. It could have lasted seconds or hours, he wouldn't of known. The lightning was lifted and Ben groaned in pain, and yet he still tried to reach Rey, who was lying unresponsive beside him. His heart stopped and filled with despair as he registered her face, locked in a glassy stare of death.

"I cannot be killed. Death is only an illusion for one who can create life," Palpatine cackled viciously, sending chills down Ben's spine.

The Sith stepped closer into Ben's field of vision and knelt to wrap his fingers around his throat. Every wrinkle and line in his face was starkly visible as the life was choked out of Ben. From this angle, he noticed Palpatine's sickly yellow eyes suddenly turn into a curious shade of blue, similar to a calm sea under full sunlight.

"Did you think I would forget you?" the emperor asked calmly. His voice had an undertone that belonged to someone else, someone female.

Ben couldn't respond with Palpatine's fingers digging into his throat, but he was bewildered. Who was that?

"Never fear, my love. I will scour the galaxy until you're by my side again," said the mysterious voice, using Palpatine's figure as a conduit. "You belong with me, not them."

Black spots filled Ben's vision and everything swirled into blackness.

-oOoOoOo-

Ben woke up screaming in horror. He was drenched in sweat and shaking hard. The tent's close walls seemed to close in on him, threatening to crush him in the confined space. The tent flap rustled as someone entered; the shadowy figure tried to grab him and he reacted in a panic, grabbing the hands hard and moving to break them. He was headbutted hard and he fell back, majorly disoriented.

"BEN!" Someone else shouted as they raced into the tent. "Ben, are you alright?"

"Stay back," warned the first person. They held a hand out to stop the second person from moving toward him. "He's not fully conscious yet."

Ben breathed hard as he tried to separate dream from reality. Slowly, the cobwebs fell away as the dream receded and he could comprehend his surroundings. Relief filled him as he saw Rey standing above him. She was being held back by Sertali. Both were looking at him with worry, though the Selonian's posture was defensive.

"You're back," Ben stood up, not even trying to hide his relief. Rey's pale, dead face from his dream was at the forefront of his mind.

"Yes, I'm fine," Rey gently pushed Sertali away and rushed to Ben and pulled him into her arms.

Ben welcomed her embrace and relished the feel of her breath against his skin. It was okay. She was alive and well... and smelling of smoke and metal.

"What happened?" Rey pulled back and looked up at him seriously.

"Nothing," Ben said. Embarrassment welled up in him as he remembered why they were in his tent. He didn't want to elaborate on his moment of weakness.

"Something is wrong, Ben," Rey frowned at him. "You wouldn't scream like that for nothing."

"I don't want to talk about it," Ben muttered, looking away. Fuck, had the whole base heard him? "When did you get back?"

"About thirty minutes ago. It's early morning," Rey supplied; she was still sporting a frown due to his evasiveness, but she dropped the topic. "I'm sorry I didn't have time to tell you I was leaving. The situation needed to be dealt with immediately."

"It's alright. I can handle myself," Ben said petulantly. He didn't need a babysitter for every minute of every day. He shook himself, determined to change the topic. "Was the mission a success?"

"Yes," Rey beamed in pride. "We received a distress call from a neighboring planet. The First Order needed the resources they had and they were stripping the planet for it. We arrived in time to stem the damage."

"I'm glad," Ben said shortly.

"We have a few hours until first meal," Rey said as she gauged the amount of light coming into the tent, which wasn't that much. "Why don't we go on that run I promised yesterday?"

Ben perked up, very interested in that. "I'd like that."

"Let's go then," Rey grabbed his jacket off the floor and handed it to him. "You better dress warm. It gets rather chilly here in the mornings."

Ben shrugged on the jacket, noticing the irony of her statement as she was dressed in her usual light armless tunic and gauzy overwraps. Rey noticed his accusing look and smirked.

"My body temperature runs warm," Rey explained. "I rarely need extra clothing here."

They exited the tent and Ben breathed in the cold and crisp air deeply. It was very refreshing and served to wipe away the remnants of the terror he'd experienced in his nightmare. The base was silent and shrouded in shadows as the sun had yet to rise above the horizon. Sertali tailed them as Rey led the way into the jungle.

"Are your hands alright, Sertali?" Ben asked in a roundabout way of apologizing for almost breaking her limbs. She was a good person for putting up with him and he didn't want to alienate her, but words of apology were not second nature for him.

"I hit you in the head, so we are even," Sertali swished her tail as they walked through the grass. "It was my fault. I should not have approached you."

Ben nodded in acknowledgment, cursing that he was so terrible at this.

"Here we are," Rey gestured at a young tree covered with white bark. "This is where I start the course."

"I will wait here for your return," Sertali sat down on a flat rock and curled her tail around a leg. She draped her blaster rifle over her lap and drew out a comlink.

"Are you sure you don't want to come with us?" Rey asked politely.

Ben gave her a pleading look as he stretched his muscles, begging her to rescind the invitation. He didn't want a guard tailing him the entire time.

"Poe gave permission for Ben to accompany you on the course," Sertali said as she pressed a button on her comlink. "With the condition that you carry an open communications device."

The comlink on Rey's belt gave a buzz and she switched it on.

"We can live with that," Rey said with disgruntlement. She put on a smile and looked at Ben. "Are you ready?"

"Yes," Ben nodded, feeling excited already.

"Ok, I'll lead for the first circuit so you can get a lay of the land," Rey directed as she quickly stretched; she was already limber from the mission.

Rey bounded off down a well-worn trail and Ben launched himself after her. The wind whipped through their hair as they raced through the vegetation. The path took them through groupings of ancient trees and along cliff edges. Ben wished he could access the Force because that would have been useful to determine where he was going; there was less light under the dense canopy. They'd been running for several minutes when they came to a large chasm, at least twenty feet across. Rey flung herself over it with a practiced leap, but Ben slowed to a stop as he considered how to get across it. The leap definitely required a Force-jump. He reached for the Force as he'd done a million times before, but the energy slipped from his grasp. Damn his wishful thinking.

"Oh!" Rey gasped from the other side. "I'm sorry. I didn't think..."

"It's alright," Ben assured her as he looked around. His gaze alighted on an inclined rocky ledge with moss in its cracks jutting out over the chasm.

"We'll take a different path, Ben," Rey said as he backed up several feet. "The ravine is less broad a few hundred meters to your left."

"I'll be there in a second," he said.

He took a deep breath and ran full-tilt at the ledge. As he reached the edge of the slight incline, he put all his strength into the last step and launched himself into the air. He soared over the ravine, getting a good view of the densely packed gnarly trees with pointy branches and a small river winding its way through it. He landed on the other side heavily and had barely taken another step when the ground fell away under his first step. He hopped quickly towards safety as the part of the ledge he'd been standing on crumbled and fell into the chasm.

"See? I made it," Ben smirked proudly.

"Don't scare me like that!" Rey thwacked his shoulder angrily, her eyes flashing with fear. "You could have gotten yourself killed! You can't take these kinds of risks now."

"I wouldn't have done it if I didn't think I could make it," he said, but privately acknowledged that she was right. He wasn't an all-powerful being anymore.

"You're just as bad as Poe," Rey sighed and shook her head as color came back to her cheeks. "No regard for your own safety."

"Don't compare me to him," Ben rolled his eyes.

"But it's true," Rey said in a sing-song voice.

Ben growled playfully at her and she laughed and ran towards a large bush with flat, circular leaves. He quickly caught up and they ran together towards the crashing sounds of a waterfall; they passed over the top of it and Ben noted that it was smaller than the other one he'd jumped from.

"There are steps going down!" Rey shouted to make herself heard over the roar of the falls.

Ben nodded and watched her for a few seconds as she traversed the hidden steps alongside the falls before following in her footsteps. The ledges were large enough to accommodate them safely and removed from the falls so they didn't get drenched, but they did get water droplets on their skin from the water mist. Ben grinned happily as he leaped from step to step; he hadn't done anything this fun in years.

They traveled along the riverbed for a mile and then curved left to enter the trees again. The dense grouping of trees thinned and opened up into a huge, flat space containing vegetation that came up to their ankles. Ben let himself run freely, just enjoying the feel of the firm ground under his feet and the wind blowing gently against his face. He felt free and exhilarated for the first time that week. Many minutes passed and soon they were entering the tree line again. The path curved to the side and Ben could hear the sound of starship engines humming.

"We're getting close to the starting point," Rey said, slowing down slightly to keep pace with him. "Want to go again?"

"Yes," Ben nodded eagerly. Anything to escape reality for a while. "But this time, don't hold back. I need to know if I can keep up with you when you're using the Force."

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" Rey asked dubiously.

"I need to know," Ben returned. He wouldn't know how much the cuffs were affecting him if he didn't test it out.

"Alright," Rey nodded. Tiny wisps of her hair had escaped her buns and were dancing in the wind. "But we're going to take a different path. I don't want to have a heart attack again when you jump a twenty-foot chasm."

"Whatever makes you comfortable," Ben said as they flew past Sertali.

The Selonian hadn't moved from her position and gazed at them impassively as they went by.

Rey increased her gait, moving more fluidly as she charged ahead. Ben pushed himself faster to keep up with her. As they neared the chasm, Rey changed their trajectory towards the left where the breadth of the gap was about half as wide. Both jumped it easily and ran for the waterfall. Ben knew the path, so he tried to forge ahead of Rey, pushing himself to the maximum. She managed to stay a few steps ahead of him as they crossed the lip of the waterfall and descended down the misty steps. As they came into the wide-open space again, Ben let loose, letting his legs churn at a fast pace. He blazed across the ground, but Rey was able to stay several feet ahead of him. She slowed down as she entered the tree line and he was able to catch up with her.

"Again," he requested.

Rey nodded and they continued on. He pushed himself hard and was able to gain some ground, but Rey easily stayed ahead of him. By the fifth circuit, he was growing tired and had to admit defeat. As they finished crossing the clearing the final time, Ben slowed to a stop. He was panting heavily and hunching over from abdominal pain.

"Are you alright?" Rey asked as she backtracked. She was breathing slightly faster, but nowhere near as quickly as Ben was.

"Fine," Ben huffed, a little put out she was able to move so much faster than him. He'd expected more of himself, even without access to the Force. "Were you using the Force?"

"Mostly," Rey admitted. "I didn't want to leave you behind."

"How much further ahead could you have gone?" Ben asked, wanting the truth.

"Maybe four times as far," Rey said in a small voice.

Ben huffed again and tried to do his best to quell the anger rising in him. He couldn't believe the cuffs had this much effect on him. He could hardly wait to see how debilitated his weapons skills were… if they ever allowed him to pick one up.

"You're still faster than anyone else on the base," Rey patted his shoulder in encouragement.

"That's not what's bothering me," Ben straightened up and looked at her face flushed cherry red from the exercise.

It was such a sharp contrast to her pale features in his dream. How could he defend her, or himself, if he didn't have all his powers at his beck and call? He walked along the path that would lead them to the starting point. He didn't want to confide those troubles to her.

"Has someone been giving you trouble?" Rey asked in concern, jogging to catch up with him. "Ben?"

"Ivin and the others are good," Ben shrugged, avoiding the true topic and feeling a little guilty about that. "Everyone else I don't know is giving me crap, but they haven't tried to attack me again."

"That's not what's bothering you," Rey surmised after a few moments and pulled him to a stop. "I can sense it."

Ben stiffened as he realized she was reading his emotions. Damn it. She knew he was lying. He hated Poe.

"Please tell me, Ben," Rey pleaded. "Whatever it is, I can help."

Ben swayed between the options of telling her and keeping it to himself. He didn't want anyone to know about his nightmare. Rey stared at him and then pulled out her comlink, which was still activated.

"Sertali? We're almost back to your position," Rey spoke into the device. "Do you mind if I cut off the comlink?"

"Is everything alright?" Sertali's voice hissed over the comlink.

"Everything's fine. Ben and I need a few minutes of privacy."

"Only a few minutes," Sertali commanded, not sounding pleased.

Rey turned off the comlink and tucked it into her pocket. She looked up at Ben expectantly.

"Fine. I had a nightmare," Ben grunted and folded his arms. "It combined all my worst enemies and fears. You were in it, being tortured by Snoke and then Palpatine. He shocked you with lightning and... and killed you. I was powerless to stop him."

"Oh, Ben," Rey placed her hands on his interlocked arms. "It was just a nightmare. You saved me on Exogol."

"It's just..." Ben breathed in deeply as twinges of fear resurfaced. "Palpatine said something to me. He said that death is an illusion for someone who can create life and that he couldn't be killed. And then he said he would find me, no matter where I am in the galaxy."

"It must be your subconscious fears," Rey assured him. "We faced Palpatine together on Exogol. I killed him by blasting his own lightning back at him. He disintegrated and there was nothing left. I felt him pass on, I'm sure of it."

"I know you're right," Ben said, but he privately disagreed. "I just can't shake this feeling there's something or someone out there still pulling the strings."

Was it Palpatine as his nightmare suggested? Force-sensitive beings were known to get visions. He'd had visions in the past, but nothing so definitive before. Or was it some other unknown entity, someone just as powerful as the Sith Lord? He shuddered to think of the possibility.

"Well, if it is Palpatine, we'll handle him together again," Rey said confidently. "Besides, given his track record, it would take him twenty years to regain his power."

"Hopefully, it's not him," Ben said as dread rose within him.

He looked down at the black metal cuffs. With these on, he'd never be able to face Palpatine. He needed to gain Poe's trust quickly so they'd be taken off; only then, would he be strong enough to face whatever was coming.

"Rey?" Sertali's voice echoed through the air.

The guard appeared around a bush, carrying her blaster rifle at the ready. She relaxed slightly as she saw both of them just talking.

"Are you alright?" she asked pointedly, glancing between him and Rey.

"We're alright, Sertali," Rey assured her. "We really just needed a private moment to talk through some things."

The meal bell chimed in the distance, signaling first meal. Had a few hours already passed?

"Let's go get something to eat," Rey suggested, moving towards the base. "I haven't eaten anything decent for fifteen hours."

Sertali gave him a suspicious glance before lowering her rifle and gesturing for him to follow Rey. Ben did so with a sigh. Time to go back to reality. People were still afraid of him, but they sure as hell weren't afraid to show their anger and disgust with him.

Ben got in line with Rey to be served. Thankfully, there were few people in line; the majority of the base must still be waking up and taking care of their morning routines. The servers were different today, a humanoid male with antennae growing out of his head and a Selkath with an interesting skin pattern of gray, pink, and yellow speckles. The first meal of the day turned out to be two bread rolls and a bowl of granular sludge.

"It's not as bad as it looks," the Selkath assured him as she handed him a bowl of the mystery goop.

"I'll take your word for it," Ben said as he took the bowl and moved on to the rolls.

The Selkath ladled out another bowl and handed it to Sertali.

"Thanks, Ayanin. How was your shift yesterday?" Sertali asked innocently.

"You should know," Ayanin said, putting her hands on her waist. "I saw you sprinting away. How much did you lose to Captain Ivin?"

"Ten creds," Sertali shrugged, not at all affected by having been called out. "I really didn't think the chief would back down."

"She almost didn't," Ayanin laughed as she poured more goop into a bowl for the next person in line. "Baso was right, though. Her way was much better," She smiled with mirth in her eyes. "Let me know the next time you bet on a shouting match. I want to get in on that action."

"I will," Sertali grinned at her, putting her pointy teeth on full display. "Congrats on surviving the rite of passage. You're a Resistance mechanic now."

"I look forward to the next time I irk the chief," Ayanin winked at the guard as she moved on.

Rey giggled lightly as they all sat down at an empty table.

"Still betting on your fellow mechanics, Sertali?" Rey asked as she dipped a roll into her bowl and took a big bite. "I thought you would have run out of money by now."

"I do win every now and then," Sertali defended herself in mock outrage. "But Ivin has the upper hand. I usually lose against him."

"Why do you do it then?" Ben asked as he dubiously eyed the liquidy food.

"It's all in good fun," Sertali shrugged as she chewed down a roll. "And what else is there to relieve tension?"

Ben shrugged and picked up a roll and bit into it. His teeth had a hard time sinking into the bread and he had an even harder time swallowing the dry morsel he managed to tear off.

"It's better if you dunk it in the porridge first," Rey recommended as she scooped white granules onto her half-eaten roll.

"Is that what this is?" Ben asked as he dipped a tiny section of his roll into the bowl.

He put it in his mouth before he could lose his nerve. The porridge was sweet and warm and didn't taste all that bad, once one got over the texture. The roll had softened up a bit too.

"See? Not bad, right?" Sertali said as she finished scarfing down her rolls and started sipping porridge from her bowl.

"I think we ran out of flour," Rey said as she started on her second roll. "These look like the ones we keep in the food cryo units."

"Well, that explains why they're drier than a desert," Ben said as he suffered his way through the first reconstituted roll.

"It could be worse," Rey shrugged. "We once had to resort to eating weed balls from the lake. Larma said it has the same nutritional benefits."

Sertali snarled at that and shuddered. "I've never tasted anything so repulsive. I'd rather face the First Order naked."

"It was only that one time," Rey said comfortingly while hiding a smile behind her hand. "Poe promised to never let our situation grow that dire again."

"Spreading rumors about me?" Poe asked as he set his bowl of porridge on the table across from Ben with a clunk. Some liquid splashed out of the bowl onto the table. He sat down, not looking at Ben.

"We were talking about the weed balls Larma found and made us eat," Rey brought him up to speed.

"Oh, don't remind me of that," Poe rolled his eyes and smiled. "The whole base went after me and I wasn't even in charge then."

"You were responsible for food acquisition that week," Rey remembered fondly.

"How was your first day, Ben?" Poe asked out of the blue, his voice slightly tense.

"Why would you care?" Ben retorted, unwilling to exchange pleasantries he didn't mean.

"Fuck you," Poe snarled. "I'm trying to be polite here."

"Well, don't feel pressured to do it on my account," Ben retorted; his muscles coiled and his fists clenched in preparation to launch himself across the table.

"Good morning, everyone," Ivin greeted them as he and Aarzio quickly stepped up to the table. "Isn't it a lovely morning?"

The tense atmosphere immediately deflated. Ben couldn't hold on to his simmering rage and his muscles automatically relaxed.

"Lovely," Poe muttered in agreement, glaring at Ben.

"Why are you here?" Ben asked him as the two guards joined them at the table.

"I want damaging information on the First Order," Poe said as he tore a roll apart into quarters. "We need to know what you know. I want to destroy them before they can regain their full might."

"What exactly do you want to know?" Ben resumed eating with a grim expression. He had promised to help the Resistance and now it was time to keep that promise.

"Start listing things and I'll tell you if it's useful," Poe ordered him as he placed a reader on the table and prepped to take notes.

"There's an important mining station in the Unknown Regions called Station Theta Black," Ben supplied. "It mines Dedlanite for a majority of the First Order's blaster weapons."

"We already know about that," Poe interjected. "We infiltrated the station about a year ago, but Phasma blew it up. Shouldn't you know about that?"

"I didn't exactly read summary reports unless they directly pertained to me," Ben griped out. His focus during that time had mostly been on Rey; anything that didn't concern her, he'd ignored. "The First Order also mines for Dedlanite in asteroid fields near Maltha Obex, Hollastin, and Shola. Those are the other major locations I know about."

"Hollastin? That's ballsy of the First Order," Poe raised his eyebrow. "That's in Hutt Space. The Hutts may not hold as much power as they did 30 years ago, but they're still formidable."

"The Hutts knew not to mess with us... them," Ben finished lamely.

"Ok, we didn't know about Hollastin, so that's potentially useful," Poe typed it down. "We'll verify if it's valid and send a team there to take care of it."

"It's valid," Ben muttered. How dare Poe accuse him of lying!

If he wanted to destroy the Resistance, then he wouldn't be relaying misleading information. He'd lead an assault on their base and crush them.

"Ok, what else?" Poe asked, staring Ben directly in the eye and daring him to say something about his not trusting his word.

"I can give you a list of the officer hierarchy in the First Order," Ben snatched his reader and started making a list of officers from generals to lieutenants. "You can cross out the ones you've verified were killed at Exogol."

After a minute, Ben tossed the reader back. Poe fumbled as he tried to catch it and barely kept it from smashing into the ground. Grumbling under his breath, he perused the list.

"Hux was killed at Exogol," Poe crossed out his name. "In fact, everyone on board the Steadfast was wiped out when it crashed. It was in one of the transmissions we intercepted."

"Well, that reduces the list a considerable amount," Ben said as he took back the reader and crossed out almost two-thirds of the names. He stared at Hux's name when he finished. "Hux is dead? How did that happen?"

"We don't know, but he saved us from being executed and said he was an informant for the Resistance," Poe shrugged, taking the device back. "He let us go and stayed behind to keep his cover. We haven't heard any word of his movements since."

"He was a spy?" Ben asked dubiously. Hux was the most racist, bigoted asshole in the organization. He'd only cared about bringing the galaxy under the First Order's rule. There's no way he'd been a double agent.

"Hux made it clear he was the one sending us information recently," Poe smirked. "Apparently, you made his life miserable ever since you became the Supreme Leader. He didn't care who won the war. He just wanted to make sure you lost."

"That bastard," Ben growled as he thought about his former nemesis.

Hux was a talented individual, but extremely hard to work with. They'd clashed over almost everything. It was as if Hux had made it his purpose in life to derail him from his chosen path. Well, according to Poe, that's exactly what he'd done, going against everything he'd believed in to come out on top in their feud.

"Is this it?" Poe asked as he scanned his reader, unimpressed by the information listed there.

"I'm sure I can think of something else," Ben hissed.

He searched his memories for something the Resistance wouldn't know about... no, something Poe wouldn't know about. His thoughts alighted on some starships the First Order had been holding in reserve.

"The First Order has several star destroyers in a backup fleet they keep in the Outer Rim," Ben supplied, smug in the knowledge that he'd finally found something to impress Poe with. "They likely weren't deployed to Exogol since they were stationed on the other side of the galaxy."

"We know," Poe said with a sigh. "A few of them have been terrorizing the galaxy. We've been hard spent trying to contain the damage."

"Do you also know about the two dreadnoughts that were recently manufactured?" Ben asked, slightly deflated his biggest piece of information was a dud.

"Yes, we know about those too. One Bellator-class and one Eclipse-class," Poe confirmed darkly. "We're building bombers as fast as we can. Hopefully, the First Order won't send those into battle anytime soon."

"How the hell did you know about those?!" Ben slammed his hands on the table.

Everyone except Rey jumped and reached for their weapons, as did people at the surrounding tables. He didn't care. He had more pressing concerns.

"That's confidential information," Ben seethed. "No one knew about the reserve fleet and those dreadnoughts being constructed except those in the higher ranks..." He stopped as what he said clicked in his mind. That meant... "You have a spy who's a superior officer. Who is it?"

"We don't know," Poe shook his head.

"Tell me," Ben ground out, getting pissed off. One of his own officers, someone he'd known, had been supplying information to the Resistance right under his nose.

"We really don't know," Rey assured him, putting a hand on his bicep. "The person is one of Maz Kanata's contacts. You remember her?"

"Yes, I remember," Ben nodded with a slight smile. Maz was an old friend of the family. She had a palace on Takodana. How could he forget the place where he and Rey had first met?

"Maz gets the intel and passes it along to us," Poe explained. "I ask her who's supplying it every time, but she refuses to give me a name. She says it for their safety."

"Probably a good call," Ben said vindictively. "If they'd been caught, I would have been the first one to tear their head off."

"Could it have been Hux?" Rey asked curiously.

"I thought so too for a moment," Poe nodded seriously. "But it doesn't add up. He only started giving us information within the past few months and we've been getting intel from Maz's contact for almost a decade. Whoever it was probably died at Exogol. We haven't gotten any more data packages since."

Poe looked over the list of information Ben had given him and snorted.

"This is pathetic. I only let you stay because the Resistance leadership thinks you can give us substantial information that will let us blast the First Order into oblivion," Poe said as he stood up. Ben tried his best to not cast the table aside and throttle the man. "You better think of some intel that can actually be of use to us, and soon."

The 'or else' was left unsaid but Ben got the message. Pony up some good intel or get the fuck out of here.

"Don't listen to him," Rey said as Poe walked away. "He just wants to make you nervous. He didn't mean to threaten you."

"Yes, he did," Ben said as he stared at Poe's retreating back. He was vaguely amused he'd tried to hand him an ultimatum. He didn't care what Poe decided. He was staying here until he decided to leave. "I would have done the same in his position."

"Well, that doesn't exactly speak well of either of you," Rey sighed and scooped up some crumbs and tossed them into her empty bowl. "He's probably just cranky from getting no sleep. I need to catch up on that too, so I'll see you at mid-day meal, okay?"

"Okay," Ben turned to fully face her and his heart sank at the stressful expression she wore.

Her brow was crinkled and her spirit was visibly dampened; she looked twice her age. Were his combative interactions with Poe causing this?

"Hey, are you alright?" He asked softly, placing a hand on her shoulder.

"I'm fine," Rey smiled at him, but it lacked its usual brightness. "Just tired."

She stood and dumped her bowl in the rubbish bin to be cleaned before walking into the maze of tents. Ben stared after her, feeling decidedly odd.

"Tell me the truth," Ben directed at the three guards minding their own business. "Was that my fault?"

"What?" Aarzio asked, his head snapping up.

"That look on her face," Ben said solemnly.

The guards looked at each other, silently conversing; Ivin nodded and addressed him.

"We've noticed that Rey has been more withdrawn of late," said the captain, nodding in the direction she'd gone. "I can feel her sadness whenever you interact with her friends and it goes badly."

"Like just now?"

"Like just now," Ivin confirmed. "She wants you to assimilate into the Resistance, but she's having a hard time coming to terms with the reality that won't happen immediately."

"What can I do?" Ben asked desperately. He hated Poe for being a cocky asshole and for taking away his Force abilities, but he couldn't let that ruin his relationship, or whatever he had, with Rey.

"Be less aggressive," Aarzio spoke around a mouthful of bread roll and porridge. "I know it's an ingrained response now, but it's not helpful."

"It's a defense mechanism," Ivin corrected him helpfully. "He's only doing it when he feels threatened."

"Say it louder, why don't you," Ben growled, his hackles rising as he noticed people eavesdropping on them.

"What these two knuckleheads are trying to say, rather unsuccessfully," Sertali threw a roll nugget at Ivin's head. "Is that you should think about your response before you react."

"That's really the best advice you have?" Ben rolled his eyes. This was never going to work.

"Yes," Ivin nodded firmly. He brushed the piece of bread into his bowl. "I can't see the future, but I predict if you at least try, you'll see a marked improvement in your interaction with people."

Ben grumbled to himself, but Rey's distraught face came to mind and he sighed.

"Fine, I'll try it," he said as he gnashed his teeth.

"Excellent," Ivin smiled and stood up. "Why don't we get going. We have a busy day ahead of us."

Ben followed suit and they walked together through the tables, which were filling up with Resistance fighters. He tried to ignore the people's heavy glares, but they were quite impossible to ignore.

"There goes the traitor," said one person loudly.

"I can't believe they didn't lock him up," muttered another person quietly. "He's a danger to us and the children."

"Father-killer," Someone else said as they tried to trip him.

He understood they were angry with him, but that didn't make the words hurt any less. Ben avoided the attempts to sabotage him and tried to tune them out, but he still felt like an outsider anyway. He was like a Burra fish trying to live on dry land, surrounded by hungry predators. If he didn't adapt and find a way to gain their trust, they'd eat him alive.

---

A/N: Ben's first actual day in the Resistance. :) What do you all think?

Thanks for reading! Stay safe out there.