A/N: A look into a Nick's past gives Judy a newfound resolution to help her friend—whether he wants it or not.

My exams are over, and I'm back! I got a wonderful surprise from my good friend BeecroftA, who actually commissioned a piece of art for Evergreen! Done by ZiegelZeig, the picture is the artwork for Chapter 6, I told you so, showing a passed-out Nick cuddling Judy's stuffed rabbits. Do take a look at it! (The link is in my profile)

Also, a Merry Christmas to all. May you all have a wonderful week to end off the year.

Thanks to BeecroftA, VickyT36, Kochich, snarkysparky, niraD, Britt30, Story . Writer . 2015, Alexandre Landsec, RenegadePhantom, Khaelin02, Cimar of Turalis WildeHopps, Aronim, Viridi . Inanitas, Guest, 22animals, Extreme Light 9, Fluffy, side-fish, LuSilveira, Selaxes, luxaurorae, jimmy19990, lone Wonder, dariusjio, Euphonemes, Damien-Rose, Kilroy's Fury, gonekrazy3000, Tilkin, Omnitrix 12, Dk, Fox in the hen house, and KOakaKO for reviewing!

Chapter 9: Don't Ever Forget

"What do you mean you ran away?"

"It's a long story. But if you really want to know, I'll have to tell you more about her. My mother…was the sweetest, kindest person I've ever known."

The fox's green eyes gazed into the mirror. He held up a paw confidently.

"I, Nicholas Wilde, promise to be brave, loyal, and trustworthy," he said, reciting each word carefully.

A paw travelled down to his cheek, brushing the fur there lightly.

"You forgot 'helpful', sweetie." A calm, soothing voice said, whispering into his ear. Little Nick's ear twitched in response, and he looked up in the mirror at the red fox, rolling his eyes.

"I didn't forget, mom. I was…just testing you to see whether you knew what the oath was."

The older vixen raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. She folded her arms across her purple blouse, cocking her head playfully.

"I think the oath should include 'honest', because you're not being very honest right now, Nicholas. If you forgot the word, just admit you forgot it."

"…nah. I still say it's a test." Nick replied, grinning. A wry smile began to grow over the vixen's face herself. She leaned towards him, looking at his face through his reflection in the mirror.

"Oh really?"

By the time Nick picked up on the meaning of her words, it was too late. In a flash, she had her hands on his sides, and began tickling them while keeping a firm grip on his midsection.

"Nooooo!" he squealed, as nimble fingers danced across his sides and tummy, bringing him to his knees, and then onto the ground.

"Still want to be a smarty-fox?" his mother teased, refusing to let up.

"S-stop!" his hind leg kicked uncontrollably, while he struggled in vain to escape the tickling torture that she was putting him under. "Okay, you win! You win!"

"Hmm? I don't think I heard you clearly, Nicholas Piberius Wilde. What did you say?" she asked, continuing to tickle him in a spot right under his ribcage.

"I was wrong! I forgot the words! Ahhhh!" he squirmed, flopping about like a fish out of water.

"I thought so," his mother replied triumphantly, finally letting him go. The spent fox collapsed onto his back, panting. He raised a finger into the air.

"N-no…fair…" he wheezed.

"Of course it's not fair. I'm your mother," she replied, smiling. "Now come on, you're going to crumple your uniform if you lie on the floor like that."

With one swift motion, she held him under his arms and pulled him to his feet. Nick twitched, trying to suppress any further giggles that were threatening to leave his mouth.

"Oh, your scarf is a little loose, sweetie. Let me fix that for you," she said, kneeling down to his eye level to adjust it.

"It's not a scarf, mom." He huffed. "It's called a neckerchief. There's a difference."

"Mmhm. It's still a scarf to me, sweetie."

Nick rolled his eyes. Then he noticed her giving him the same sly look from a few seconds ago. Instantly he felt himself shrinking.

"Okay it's a scarf!"

"Yup. And don't you forget it. I know I'll never forget this lovely little spot here that makes your leg twitch like mad." She pressed a finger gently in the same spot, making Nick yelp and jump a foot into the air.

"Mom!" Nick whined.

"Aww, don't be like that, dear. Your mommy is just so proud that her little boy is going to be the first fox in the scout troupe! I couldn't be happier." She ruffled the fur on his head. "Also, you look adorably handsome in your little uniform."

"C'mon, mom, I'm not little anymore, you know." Nick whined. "Think of what the other scouts would say if they saw you acting all mommy-like to me."

"Well I bet they would be absolutely jealous. One hundred percent." She bopped him gently on his nose. "And you'll always be my little Nick. That will never change."

Nick looked straight into his mom's eyes. They were still playful, but Nick knew that she meant every word that she said. He let himself smile a little as she gently grasped his hand.

"Now c'mon, let's try the oath again." She held his hand up it up. They both looked in the mirror at each other. Nick could practically feel the pride and happiness radiating from his mother. There was no way he could stay mad at her when she was like this. And even more, it brought a warmth to his heart that nothing else ever could. With her, he felt strong.

"I, Nicholas Wilde, promise to be…"

"…That was my mother, in a nutshell."

Nick leaned back against the wall of Judy's apartment, resting with his hands behind his head. He was staring at the blank television, looking at his blurred reflection with a sort of odd interest.

"She sounds wonderful," Judy said, unable to resist a small smile from growing. "You know, she was right. What's her name, by the way?"

"Evie. Evie Wilde. What do you mean she was right?"

"You look absolutely adorable in your little scout uniform," Judy said, reaching out to tilt the photo towards her. "…Hey, Nick. Can I ask you a question?"

"If the question is where the ticklish spot on my body is, I'm not telling you." He replied flatly. Judy rolled her eyes.

"As much as I would like to know your funny spot, Nick, that wasn't my question. This scarf…"

"Neckerchief." Nick corrected.

"Don't you go starting that again!" Judy exclaimed, pointing a finger at the grinning fox. "Unless you're asking for a good tickling…"

The cheeky grin vanished. Nick immediately recoiled, his tail shooting up defensively.

"You wouldn't dare."

"Actually, I would. I've tickled over two hundred of my brothers and sisters into submission. You'd just be another one on the list. But coming back to the point…" she held up the picture of his younger self.

"The red neckerchief in the picture…isn't it the same one you always carried around with you? The one you used on my leg back at the museum," Judy asked, showing him said picture.

That was enough to make Nick blink in surprise.

"Huh. So you noticed, Carrots." Nick finally replied, slowly lowering his tail—although he still looked wary. "Yeah, it's the same one. Was, anyway. I'm guessing the doctors cut it up when they worked on fixing your leg."

So it is the same! Judy shouted triumphantly in her head. She had been all but convinced at that point, but official confirmation was always good. She did her best to maintain her calm expression though.

"Yeah…sorry about that, Nick. I didn't know it meant that much to you. May I ask why you kept it all this time? Even after what happened with the Junior Ranger Scouts?"

Nick brought his legs up onto the bed, swirling what was left in his soda can back and forth, before taking the photo back from her once more.

"Long story short, I kept it because of her. Because of my mom. We weren't that well off when I was small. It was just me and her, since my dad disappeared when I was small. She had to work really hard to support us, put food on the table, and pay the bills. But she still set aside her money for me, for this uniform." He set his drink down. "I couldn't just throw it away, even though I never wanted to go back after that night. So I kept it with me."

Judy nodded. So far, everything made sense to her. She was tempted to pull the neckerchief out right there and then to surprise him with it. But the three words Nick said were still nagging at her. She decided to hold it for now.

"Nick…I know it's not a comfortable topic, but…could you tell me more about what happened that night? What did you tell your mom? What did she say? Was that when you ran away?" Judy asked, knowing that she was treading on thin ice.

And yet, Nick merely chuckled.

"Relax, Carrots. One thing at a time. If you want to know what happened that night, well…I didn't even want to go home that night. I wasn't sure what I was going to tell her. In fact, I wanted to keep it from her completely…"

"Of course, things don't always go according to plan."

Nick blinked. He knelt on the ground and stared at his reflection in a puddle by the side of the road, gently rubbing his eyes. He then opened them wide, looking carefully into the whites of his eyes.

They're still red…

His hands unconsciously travelled to his mouth. The muzzling hadn't physically hurt all that much, but he still felt the residual sting where the muzzle had pressed against his fur. As he stared at the forlorn, miserable fox in the puddle's reflection, his pale green uniform caught his eye. It was all dirty from what happened earlier. What would his mom say? She was so proud of him for finally becoming a junior ranger scout. How could he face her now?

Nick held his head in his hands. He didn't want to think about it right now. He was exhausted, completely drained. He could think about what to do in the morning. For now, he just had to avoid talking to his mom. At least for tonight.

Finally mustering enough courage, he stood up and took the final few steps towards his house. He closed his eyes, and then pressed the doorbell.

Here goes…

A second passed. Then two.

He heard the door swing open.

"Sweetie! How was it?" his mom's gentle, yet excited, voice called out at him. As tempted as he was to open his eyes, he kept them shut.

"Ugh, it was exhausting, mom. I just wanna sleep right now. But it was great! They had a tough initiation session and all that for the new members," Nick said, stepping in and wrapping his arms around her in a hug. He was glad to feel her arms warmly holding him back. Soon he broke away, yawning widely.

"An initiation session?" Worry seemed to seep into her voice. "I hope they didn't do anything too harsh…I heard some bad stories about these kind of things…"

"Nah, it was fine. Nothing I couldn't handle. Like I told them, I was born ready for this kind of thing." He puffed out his chest proudly, but he felt a sudden wave of dread rush over him. The mocking laughter of the other scouts echoed in his head. Something was welling up behind his eyes. He clenched his fists.

He heard a gasp.

"Sweetie, what happened to your clothes? They're all dirty. Were you rolling on the ground or something?" she asked. Nick could already imagine the frown on her face.

"Oh, that was part of the test. Had to do some exercises to prove I was worthy, y'know. Don't worry, mom. It'll come out in the wash."

Don't show it don't show it…

"Anyway, I'm gonna go bathe and change out, alright, mom?" he said, doing his best to smile tiredly. He opened his right eye just a crack to see the stairs, before taking the first step up. When he was sure that his mom couldn't see his face, he finally opened his eyes.

"Okay, sweetie. Don't forget to pick up your clothes after you're done."

"I got it!" he called out. He took each step slowly and casually, trying not to rush. That would probably have given it away.

The moment he turned the corner, his hands flew to his eyes to wipe away the forming droplets that he'd fought so hard to hold back. He hadn't expected that to happen. He thought he'd exhausted all his tears, but it looked like he wasn't quite done just yet. He ran into his room, closing the door quickly behind him before letting out a small sniffle.

At least she didn't notice anything. He unbuttoned his shirt and loosened the neckerchief from around his neck, before tossing both onto his bed. Seeing them just brought the bad memories back again, replaying in his head like a broken record.

"Did you think we'd trust a fox without a muzzle?"

"You're even dumber than you look!"

"Stop it…stop it…" he willed, squeezing his eyes shut. Something was rising in his throat. He sniffled again, coughing softly this time. And then he heard the one thing he never wanted to hear.

"…Nicholas?"

The pain was gone, instantly replaced by fear. He jumped to his feet to do something, but by then, the door had already swung open.

He came face to face with his mother.

A second passed. It only took her that long for her eyes to widen in concern. Nick quickly turned away, but he knew it was too late. She'd already seen enough.

"U-uh, y-yeah mom?" he stuttered. Stupid! You can't even control your voice!

He waited for her response. A hundred different possibilities were already playing out in his mind.

"Nicholas, what's going on? Are you crying? Are you trying to hide something from me?"

Whatever it was, he had to think of a good reason to tell her. Tell her he'd lost his wallet, or failed the test or something. Anything but—

He felt a hand on his shoulder, gently turning him. He didn't resist. His mom was on her knees, looking straight into his eyes. There was no contempt, no anger. Her eyes darted across different parts of his body, looking around in a half-panic, half-worried manner. She felt around his face, his shoulders, and his chest, seeming to look for any signs of an injury on his body.

"S-sweetie…" Her voice was shaky.

And that was enough to break the dam. Hiccupping uncontrollably, Nick squeezed his eyes shut, clenching his fists. He couldn't hold it in anymore, letting the last reserves of his tears flow down his cheeks. He sobbed, giving in to the pain and sorrow, knowing deep down inside that things could never be the same again.

"M-m-mom, I…I…"

Soft, warm arms wrapped themselves around him. For a moment, he was weightless, and it took a while to realise that his mom had scooped him up in her arms. But he didn't care how humiliating it looked. At this point, she was there, and that was all he wanted.

"I…it's okay, sweetie. Everything's going to be okay…" she said, pressing her head down against his and holding him tight.

For the first time in his life, Nick didn't believe her.

"Somehow, she knew, even though I tried my hardest to hide it from her. Moms have this freaky power, you know?" Nick said. "I ended up bawling it all out to her like a baby. Definitely not one of my prouder moments." he laughed.

Judy stared in silence. How could he laugh when talking about something so emotional? That was Nick, she guessed. Still…

"What did your mom do after you told her?"

"Well, I don't remember exactly, but I know she was pretty upset. She called the Scoutmaster first thing in the morning to tell him about what happened that night."

"And the kids that muzzled you?"

"Turns out that they lied about me to the Troupe leader after I ran out that night. They told him that I decided not to show up, and that I wasn't interested. Of course, nothing happened to them, because they denied doing anything. But it didn't matter. Even if they got what they deserved, I wasn't interested in going back." Nick said nonchalantly. Judy's ears drooped.

"Why not?" she asked, even though she had a feeling she already knew the answer.

"Sure, those mammals that muzzled me were stupid and bigoted, and they completely deserved to be put in their place. But it didn't mean that they were wrong about how people felt about foxes. I knew I was never going to be accepted, so I refused."

"And your mom was okay with that?"

"Of course not. She tried her hardest to get me to change my mind, to 'show them that I wasn't like the foxes they thought I was'. But…"

"But…?" Judy parroted, looking at him intently. A frown began to cross Nick's face as he continued staring at the photo.

"I didn't come around. And as I grew up, I saw with my own eyes, just how much people hated foxes. That included my mother. She worked three dead-end jobs because nobody would take a fox—much less an uneducated one—for a proper job. I still remember when one of her bosses accused her of stealing money from the cash register. She didn't do it, of course, and they had no evidence whatsoever. But they still decided that she did it, and fired her on the spot, because hey, who else but the fox could have stolen the cash, right?"

Nick's voice was still calm, but Judy could sense an anger bubbling deep within him. She never knew. What must it have been like, to grow up with so much distrust? She couldn't imagine how Nick—or any fox, for that matter—could have lived through that sort of life.

"That's horrible…" Judy said.

"Yeah, and you know what the worst part was? She never gave up. She continued believing in people, telling me to show all the other people that I could be more than just the dishonest fox they assumed I was. But I could easily see the truth for myself, through her. People were never going to trust foxes."

Judy was silent for a moment, looking down at the ground.

"…Was that when you started hustling?"

"No. Not yet. I didn't start till a few years after the Junior Ranger Scouts incident. Up to that point, I'd been the sweet, charming little fox you and my mom like to think I am."

That brought a small smile to Judy's face.

"You are, Nick. Minus the 'little' part."

"And the 'sweet', and the 'charming'," Nick said. "Anyway, something happened when I was twelve. I came across a wallet that someone had dropped, which had a lot of money in it. And when I say a lot, I mean a lot. I was so happy. We could have kept ourselves afloat so much longer without her having to work herself the way she did. I bought lots of groceries for the house, sweets for myself, and a beautiful necklace for her to celebrate. But when I got home and surprised her with it, she was horrified."

"Horrified?"

"Yeah. She returned the necklace, and then she went with me to return the wallet to its owner with all the money replaced. She even paid for all the sweets I'd bought out of her own pocket. I don't even understand how she could have turned down free cash when we were already struggling. You remember how I said I'd never let anyone get to me?"

"Yeah, why?" Judy asked.

"Well, it's kind of hard to not let it get to you when the owner of the wallet you're returning shouts at you and accuses you of stealing it in the first place."

"What?!"Judy exclaimed, her smile vanishing. Nick nodded.

"Yeah, he did. He said he was going to call the police on us for being lowlife fox thieves. I was so mad, I wanted to punch his face in. But of course, she stopped me. That's just the kind of person she is. I was still furious when I got home."

"And that was the night everything changed."

"Why?! Why would you defend him?!" Nick yelled, storming through the front door. A weary-looking Evie followed him in, shutting the door behind her less-than-gently.

"Nicholas, you can't just punch him because you didn't like what he said. You could get arrested for that!"

"I don't care! He had it coming! Did you hear what he said?! He said I must have stolen it! He said it was typical of a fox! And then he said that I learned it from you! How could you let him say that?!" Nick slammed his fist against the dining table. It hurt.

"He's old, Nicholas. He didn't know what he was saying—"

"He didn't deserve to get his wallet back! That old, fat, disgusting slob!" he held his tongue when he saw his mother's face. He still glowered at her, fist trembling.

"Even if he was rude, returning the wallet was still the right thing to do, sweetie," his mom replied, speaking slowly, probably in an attempt to calm him down.

"You always say that, mom! But why do we even do the right thing?! Look how everyone treats us! Treats you! We could have used that money, too…you could have quit one of your jobs and spent some time home for a change!"

"This isn't about me, Nicholas. Keeping the money wouldn't have been right!"

"So what, huh? What if I don't want to be this perfect good little fox you keep telling me to be?! I spent so much time using the money to make our lives better…didn't it mean anything to you?" he asked, feeling a sharp pain in his chest. "And when I stood up for you, you made me apologise to him!" he shouted, breathing shallowly.

His mother walked over to him, kneeling down on the ground in front of him.

"Sweetie, I appreciate everything you've done for me. But you need to understand that keeping the money would be stealing. I don't want you to become like one of those foxes." She reached out to hold his hand, but Nick slapped it away, a lot harder than he expected. It was enough to make her recoil.

"Everybody already thinks I'm one of those foxes! And you know what? I would rather have been a horrible, dirty fox that kept the wallet and actually made our lives better, rather than be accused of being a thief and humiliated by a stupid old goat!"

"Nicholas! Don't say that!"

"I don't care! I hate you! I wish I'd never listened to you, because maybe then we would actually have a better life!" he screamed at the top of his voice, storming up the stairs, leaving his stunned mother behind.

Nick stomped into his room, slamming the door as hard as he could. The anger was still burning inside him, making his head throb dully. With a groan, he jumped onto his bed and screamed into his pillow, pounding his fists onto the bed. At least that hurt less than pounding it against the table.

He waited for his mother to eventually follow him into the room and chew him out for screaming at her at point blank range. But a few minutes of silence passed, and nothing happened. Only the soft tick of the clock let him know that time was still passing. She was taking too long. Far too long. And then he heard it.

A quiet cry.

His ears perked up and began twitching immediately. Getting off the bed, he crept over to the door. A few muffled sounds passed through the door, but he couldn't make them out. He was starting to have a sinking feeling in his stomach. Gently twisting the doorknob, he pulled the door open, being careful not to make too much noise.

There was no one there.

It seemed that his mother was still downstairs. He continued tiptoeing until he reached the stairs. From the top, he could see his mother sitting on the living room couch, holding her head in her hands. She was whispering to herself, as if praying. Nick strained his ears to hear what she was saying.

"Dear, I don't know what to do. Please, please tell me what to do…I think I'm losing him…" she finally said, between sobs.

A chill ran down his spine. Nick had never seen his mother cry before. Ever.

Slumping to the ground, Nick held his own head in his hands.

What have I done…?

The photo fell to the bed. Nick left it there.

"That was the first time I made my mother cry. And I told myself that I never wanted to do that to her again. That was when I decided to lie. About everything. The next morning, I apologised and told her I didn't mean what I said, and that I was going to continue to be honest, like she wanted. She seemed to feel better, and that's all I wanted. But it was all a bunch of lies, because eventually I became everything she never wanted me to be. A hustler, a no-good fox that swindled naïve saps—like you—out of their money."

"Nick, that's not…hey!"

"I lied to her ever since I was twelve, Carrots. That's almost twenty years. The lies started small. Things like 'I'm volunteering part-time at the carnival' and 'I need to work on a school project with my friends', when I was actually pulling off hustles. I couldn't let her find out about it. She would never forgive me for not only lying to her for so long, but going against everything she believed in. I even spent more time away from home so she wouldn't have the chance to probe into it."

He pulled out his phone, casually glancing at the time before continuing.

"Then the lies got bigger. I spent more and more time away from home. I told her I was accepted into a college in the middle of Zootopia, and later on, that I got a job as a consultant. I eventually moved out for good, and I never went back. That was ten years ago."

So that's what he meant by running away…Judy thought to herself.

"You never spoke with her ever since you left?" she asked. "Not even once in ten years?"

"Oh no, I still spoke with her…maybe once, twice a year. Usually to wish her happy birthday and stuff like that, or to tell her that I wired some money to her bank account. But I never met her in person, and I have no intention of starting now."

Judy was stunned.

"Nick, she won't be angry at you. I'm sure she still loves you a lot, and I'm sure she would understand why you never called her all this time. I know she'll be proud to hear that you're becoming a police officer."

Nick laughed dismissively.

"Not happening, Carrots," he said, shaking his head.

"Why not?" Judy fired back.

"Because she already gave up on me a long time ago—"

"—You don't know that!" Judy interjected, sitting upright.

"…If you would let me finish, yes, I do know that. Two years ago, she called me. She said she was tired of me trying to avoid her. She told me to either come down to see her, or stop calling completely."

Judy had a sinking feeling in her stomach.

"And what did you say…?" she asked.

"…You should know the answer to that, Carrots. She doesn't want to forgive me, and that's the end of that." Nick stood up, dusting his shirt off. "I'm going."

"What? Where are you going?" Judy said, alarmed. She stood up immediately with him.

Nick turned his head, pointing a thumb behind him.

"Pizza's here. I'm gonna go pick it up."

Oh, Judy said to herself. She had been so focused on him that she'd forgotten all about the surprise pizza that he'd ordered to celebrate him getting into the academy.

"Nick wait. Please, just give it a chance. Your mom—"

"Carrots." Nick stopped in his tracks, turning his head. He looked dead serious. "That's enough. Just drop it, okay?"

Judy's ears drooped behind her head. Slowly, she nodded her head.

"All right, Nick. I won't ask about it anymore."

The fox's expression softened.

"Thanks, Fluff-butt. We're supposed to be celebrating, so don't let it get you down, alright?" His usual smirk returned to his face. "I'll be right back."

With that, Nick's bushy tail slipped past the door. Judy frowned, thumping her foot on the ground. She didn't like what she had just heard. Not one bit. How could Nick be so stubborn?

There's no way Nick's mom would just give up on him like that. No way.

She had a feeling there was still something she was missing. Something Nick wasn't telling her. And Nick didn't look like he was going to be telling her anytime soon. If that was the case…

He's not the only one who can be stubborn.

She pulled out the neckerchief from her pocket. She was supposed to have passed it back to Nick as a surprise, after he told her why it meant so much to him. But now, she had a change of plans. She was going to need to hang on to it a while longer.

She would need it if she was going to find Nick's mother.