Disclaimer: All canon characters, places, plots and situations from the Harry Potter Universe belongs to J.K. Rowling. I make no profit from this.
Warnings: Rated M for language, violence and scenes of a sexual nature.

A/N: Okay, this is a big 'un! It just made sense to end it where I did so hope you enjoy the longer chapter.

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WARNINGS FOR THIS CHAPTER:

Please note this chapter includes scenes of a sexual nature, using descriptive language, so if that's not your thing, don't read beyond the first break in the story. From this point on consider this a general warning for this story.

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Just a few response to you lovely reviewers:

j-jip Yep, something tells me that crowd is never going to be able to trust good old Rosmerta again, lol. And definitely no more Cheeky Leprechauns in their future. I agree about the punch! Although I'd probably pull a younger Hermione move and secretly enjoy it while lecturing Sirius on the pointlessness of violence. Also, thanks for your review on chapter seven, it's good hearing specifically what is liked or not.

D-T Thanks very much for your review in chapter 6, I'm glad you appreciate the development, I think that's the most fun! You are absolutely correct, it's one of those things where I got so caught up in writing Sirius' mind and emotions that I evidently (literally) lost the plot. I might change it but I definitely won't make the same mistake again, so thank you for that and for the rest of your thoughtful review.

SuneID Thanks for your review, I'm so stoked you got a laugh out of that, I giggled a lot writing that one. Yep, Rosmerta kind of saved the evening from being a complete bummer, except now everyone won't talk about it for different reasons, lol! My apologies to your offended cat, I often offend my cat by having audible reactions to things too.

Cheeky Leprechauns on the house for all of you who have followed, reviewed and added this story to your favourites. It's the encouragement that fuels me onto the next chapter!

Chapter Nine: What Goes Around

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Hermione got up earlier than usual that Monday morning. Over the weekend she'd sent an owl to their Head of Department, Madam Urna Edgecraft, asking her for an urgent early morning meeting, and the older woman had agreed. She'd also penned a quick owl to Mari, letting her know what had happened in case she needed support in the office.

She entered the Ministry's grand atrium through one of it's many Floos and was gratified to see that it was quieter than normal.
It was funny, she thought to herself, that when she was younger this building and the witches and wizard in it had had her in awe. Now she was one of those people and knew how ordinary their days actually were. It wasn't as glamorous from this side of the curtain, and that was coming from an Unspeakable. The elevator she took down to ninth was empty, her nervously tapping foot echoing in the small space. Rehearsing what she wanted to say, her feet took her down the familiar route automatically, until she'd reached the entrance to the hall leading to the black door, where a curious sound brought her to a stop.

The Ministry was a large, sprawling, magical building and there were lots of rooms and extensions over the centuries that had been used and abandoned. The direction from which Hermione was certain the noise was coming from happened to be another hallway full of storage rooms. So few people ever had reason to come down to this floor that Hermione felt it was her duty to investigate the sounds. With this in mind she pulled out her wand and quietly made her way down the dark side-passage. Soon she could see that one of the doors was slightly open, and the light spilling through the gap was dim and blue, the same as the light of a Lumos.

She was almost to the door when she heard the giggling, a whisper and then, unmistakably, the moan of someone in pleasure. At that very moment Hermione would have quietly retraced her steps and left the lovebirds alone, if she hadn't also heard two voices and recognised them. One was most definitely her station-mate and friend, Mari, and the other… She struggled to place the tone, the wizard's voice was so familiar. She clamped her hand over her mouth to prevent her squeak of realisation from reaching the room's occupants, and quietly backed out of the passage, making her way to the office.

Now that she was away from them, she began to giggle. Mari and her were going to have a very interesting conversation later, thought Hermione, torn between glee at finally having something to hang over her friend's head, and mild shock at what exactly it involved. Or whom.

In the main office shared by all the Unspeakables was another door that led to an office belonging to the Head. It had a large fireplace, a desk, couch, filing cabinets and not much more; Madam Edgecraft as Head Unspeakable was often away on 'important matters'. She greeted Edgecraft as she closed the door behind her, and her superior gave her a warm smile. "Please sit Ms. Granger," said Edgecraft, and Hermione took a seat. The witch had a shoulder length bob of ivory white hair and a severe face that was alleviated by her good temperament. "Now what can I do to help you?" Hermione related what had happened the Friday before and by the end, the older witch was frowning. "Are you afraid for your safety here Ms. Granger"

"Not really," admitted Hermione. Baric might be an Unspeakable but she had war experience. If Sirius hadn't punched the wizard that night, she was sure he'd be in worse shape than just a bloody mouth. Her days of objecting to violence in all situations were long gone. "I am concerned about us working in the same office. Also I wanted to let you know that there'll probably be something in the paper," she said apologetically.

Her Head was familiar with the pitfalls of Hermione's very public status. She nodded, then swished her long, bendy wand to open a filing cabinet and float over a folder to herself. She thumbed through the documents, her reading glasses perched on the edge of her nose. Apart from the crisp sound of each page as it was turned, the room was so silent Hermione though she might've even been breathing too loudly.

"Okay," said the older witch finally, removing her spectacles and raising her eyes to Hermione's. "I'm sorry to say that I won't be able to remove Baric from the office, as he has a two-year contract and we can't replace him at the moment anyhow. I'm sure you can appreciate the information we work with is quite sensitive. Are you sure you can't lay a charge against him for assault?"

"No ma'am, if he'd caused me clear physical damage then yes I might've been able to, but since I don't have a mark on me all I can do is cite his behaviour."

"I see, well that in itself is concerning enough, as far as my thinking goes. This is what I'm going to do. I'm going to go call Baric in to my office now and let him know that he is not, under any circumstances to go near you or speak to you. I understand his workstation is currently the opposite end of the office to yours?"

"Yes it is."

"Well then that's as far away from you I can get him, unfortunately. How does this sound Ms. Granger? You are fully entitled to escalate the issue if you feel it is necessary," said Edgecraft kindly.

"No, I don't think that will be necessary ma'am. I'd rather contain the issue as much as I can, keep things as private as possible," said the young witch. "I'm happy for you to give him a warning about keeping his distance, I'm sure that will be enough to prevent any more conflicts."

"I understand Ms. Granger and should you feel at any point that things need to be re-evaluated, you will come to me, yes?"

"Yes, thanks so much Madam Edgecraft."

"You're most welcome Ms. Granger. I have to address a few letters but as soon as I'm done I'll be out there."

Hermione nodded, and left the office feeling a little lighter already.

Her happiness was short-lived as she re-entered her own office. At the workstation she shared with Mari, there was a large bouquet of flowers on Hermione's desk, and her friend was glaring across the room at Kris as though she could set the wizard on fire with just her eyes. Hermione headed towards her station but Kris met her halfway. "Excuse me," she said firmly, not meeting his eyes.

"Please Hermione, please let me apologise-" begged the man.

"That's Ms. Granger to you, and apologies won't be necessary Mr. Baric. Also, if those flowers are from you I suggest you take them back now or they'll be incinerated in a few minutes. They look quite expensive and I'm sure you can find someone else who will appreciate them."

"Herm- Ms. Granger, please," begged the wizard. Hermione looked at him, wondering what it was that had ever made her agree to go out with the wizard.

"Say your piece and get out of my way Mr. Baric," she said finally. He gave a sigh of relief.

"About the other night, I was so very drunk and completely out of order. I never meant to say what I did and I want to apologise and ask if you could forgive me for my careless words-" Hermione could not bear to hear any more.

"Being drunk is not an adequate excuse, not for your words nor your actions. I don't believe that alcohol changes a person, rather than it only exposes what's already inside. Clearly you've been under the misapprehension that I owed you sexual favours in exchange for being a 'nice, ordinary bloke', and I'm glad I got see you that way because I can assure you this will be the last conversation we ever have that isn't strictly professional."

She walked past the wizard to her desk, and thankfully before anything more could be said, Madam Edgecraft entered the room and called Kris away with her for a talk. Hermione made her way over to her desk, settling her bag on top. She rolled her eyes at Mari. "Can you believe his excuses?" she said.

"Didn't hear any of it, you were standing out of range but sure looked like you gave it to him good," said Mari.

Hermione smacked her forehead."Oh yes, privacy charms – he said that he was drunk and spoke carelessly, and asked for my forgiveness. Bloody moron."

"Sounds like you've had one hell of a weekend Books."

"I don't know where my head's at, Mari," confessed Hermione, setting the bouquet on her desk on fire before vanishing it with a flick of her wand.

"Pity, those were pretty," said Mari blandly.

"I warned him," Hermione said happily.

"Books, you can be scary sometimes. You want to get lunch later and tell me what's got Hermione Granger all aflutter?"

"Lunch, yes," said Hermione with a grin. "But first you're going to tell me about the private meeting you seemed to be having with Severus Snape in a storeroom off the main corridor this morning."

Lunchtime found the pair sitting at a nearby café, deep in conversation. After returning from the Head's office, Kris had looked her way a few times but had so far kept to himself. Although she'd owl'd Mari about Friday night's altercation, she had just now explained, in detail, exactly what had happened in the pub after the fight and was patiently waiting for Mari to stop laughing.

"So was it big?" asked the blonde once she'd caught her breath.

Hermione rolled her eyes. "Of course that's what you'd focus on," she said. Mari shrugged unapologetically.

"I'll tell you about mine if you tell me about yours.

Hermione groaned. "Please let's just pretend that you didn't just offer to tell me about my ex-Professors penis, which, by the way, how did that happen?

"Thank Merlin you found out yourself, I've been going mad keeping this to myself," said Mari eagerly.

"We met at a Potions Conference in Prague last September," the blonde said, with a shy smile that Hermione had never seen on her before. Mari told Hermione how, during a discussion with an arrogant and pushy Potions Novice, Severus was the only other person present besides herself who attempted to call the wizard out on his flawed thinking. "So much ego stroking at these events, you know? Everyone too scared to offend anyone in case they lose a grant or sever a lucrative connect. This is how accidents happen. Bad information because those who know better don't speak up," she said passionately. When the men had spoken over Mari, taking advantage of her status as one of the few females in the field, Severus had taken the wizard to task, exposing his foolishness. "Merlin Books, his voice, his mind, his passion. I could have snogged him there and then," Mari said dreamily. "But of course that would have been unprofessional."

"So how did you get together?"

"Oh I waited for him outside his room and jumped him the moment he showed up."

Hermione laughed out loud at that, thinking how much Mari reminded her of Ginny. If it hadn't been Sirius that was on her mind, she would probably be chatting to her red-headed friend right now. "I can't say I'm not surprised," admitted Hermione. "I wouldn't have seen the match myself. Besides you both being extremely intelligent and talented and sharing an important common interest… You're worlds apart personality-wise."

"Most of you around here would think that," said Mari. "But I didn't know him then and all I can tell you is that he is a wonderful man. Taciturn, broody, impatient – yes, but I know how to bring out the best in him," she said with a telling grin. Opposites attract, look at you and your wizard; he's a wildcard, you're always looking for control. You're Books, he's action."

"He's not my wizard," mumbled Hermione, picking at her poppy seed muffin.

"Darling, from what I've heard he's definitely not anyone elses wizard."

"What do you mean?" said Hermione with naked curiosity.

"I've never met your Sirius myself, but I have friends who like the party scene. He might not be Harry Potter, but he's still well-known enough, especially amongst the women, to be noticed when he's gone," she said, apologetically as Hermione's face fell at the reference to Sirius' reputation. It was also a sobering reminder of the type of women Sirius went after and she knew she definitely did not fit that bill. "Books, I can see that brain of yours going into overdrive. What I was going to say is that whatever Sirius was doing before the two of you started… whatever, he hasn't been doing it for a long time."

"That doesn't prove anything," said Hermione, downcast.

"Yes, but Merlin's sake, please trust me when I say a man who doesn't want to encourage a woman doesn't flirt with her after she's had her hand on his cock, potion-induced or not. If he thought you were a munter he'd be keeping his distance."

"Or, he could be trying not to hurt my feelings, we are friends, you know."

Marietta looked at her for a few long seconds before speaking. "Hun, I know you've had a tough time and letting people in is hard, but that's what relationships take. And while I'm flattered to have managed to get past your walls, if you want a chance at happiness you're going to have to take it."

Hermione gave her friend a small smile. "Thanks Mari," she said, taking a deep breath and letting it out before changing the subject. "Now you still haven't explained to me why all the secrecy with Severus?"

It was Mari's turn to look disappointed, pushing a cherry tomato around on her plate aimlessly as she explained the situation to Hermione. What it came down to was that Severus was a private man, much more so after the war. Mari understood this and was supportive of keeping their relationship private, but as their courtship approached a year, she was beginning to get frustrated with not being able to tell the world that she was his and he was hers. Hermione could easily imagine the looks on some of her friends' faces if it were to come out that their surly ex-Professor was dating a stunningly beautiful and intelligent witch like Mari.

Sirius stumbled into Grimmauld through the living room floo around eleven o'clock that Monday night, rumpled and smelling faintly of baby powder.

Ginny was almost six months pregnant now, and Sirius had been helping out with the kids as much as possible so that his godson and his wife could have a little more time together. Although looking after Harry's children was exhausting, he really enjoyed being a part of their lives. He couldn't believe the time he'd wasted the year before not being their Uncle Sirius.

By the time Harry and Ginny arrived home that night, Sirius was out for the count on their couch, dressed in an eye-watering orange Chudley Cannons t-shirt he'd found in Harry's wardrobe – the only thing that had fit, and as he had no choice since his own shirt was un-wearable even after the use of cleansing charms, torrid orange it was. Five-year-old James had fallen asleep on Sirius chest, as if the older wizard was simply a mattress that happened to groan when you bounced on it.
He flopped onto the nearest couch, cricking his neck.

"What in the world are you wearing?" asked Hermione, wrinkling her nose. "And what's that smell?" She was curled up on the other sofa, book in hand.

"Well it's not me, it's this bloody shirt," he said, holding up a plastic bag containing said shirt. He flopped onto another couch. Hermione pulled out her wand and banished the shirt to Sirius laundry, casting a freshening spell for good measure. "Thanks," he said, tipping his neck back, tiredly, exposing the tight column of his neck.

"What have you been doing?" asked Hermione. He really did look awful in orange, although she had never met anyone who looked good in that particular shade of the colour.

"Babysitting at Harry's." She looked at him, puzzled.

"Albus decided it would be a really good time to go for a piss while I was changing his nappy," he explained. Hermione giggled. He lifted his head, casting an affronted glare her way. "I hardly think it's funny that a small child urinated on me," he said, but with a barely concealed laugh of his own.

"It's not that," said Hermione – I really thought you'd come back from the pub! And instead, it's the complete opposite of that. Really Sirius, however are you going to keep up your reputation this way?"

"Was I really that bad?" he asked. She shrugged non-committally , allowing him to continue his story. "So there I am, covered in piss, trying to find something of Harry's to wear, which was almost impossible. He's as lanky as his dad ever was! Anyway, this is the only thing I could find," he said disdainfully, tugging at the hem of the t-shirt. "And then, right after Albus went down, James decided to drag bedtime out into a full circus act," he groaned, covering his eyes with a hand.

"Those little boys have you wrapped around their finger," said Hermione fondly.

"Try neck!" exclaimed Sirius. "James had a night terror and wouldn't stay in bed, so little sprog fell asleep on me on the couch. Tell you what, even five year olds are heavy when they're pressing on your delicate bits." Hermione snorted inelegantly. "And then," said Sirius, getting more animated, "Would you believe the pair of them, Harry and Ginny, get home and snap a photograph of us. Of me fast asleep, wearing this!"

Hermione snickered, quickly looking neutral when he looked sharply at her. "I'm sure it was sweet, it's nice for the children to have photos with you. Stop being so vain."

"Vain! You get snapped wearing this and tell me about being vain," complained Sirius. "Godric forbid anyone thinks I support the Chudley Canons." He shuddered.

"Well if it makes you feel better," she said absentmindedly as she returned to her book, "I've got heaps of photos with Rose and there's one where she emptied her entire sippy cup on me in public. And I was wearing a white t-shirt. Now that's em-" She looked up at her own words, noticing that Sirius was looking, suddenly and disturbingly perky. "No, no, absolutely not," she said.

"Oh c'mon love, you've heard about mine, s'only fair."

"You must have been hit with a Confundus if you think I'm showing you that photograph, besides, you've heard about mine now so I'm sure that makes us square. Now if you don't mind, I have a book-"

She shrieked as Sirius all but pounced on her. "Photo please," he said, tickling her mercilessly. She was giggling helplessly, her face turning red with the effort of escaping his fingers, which were digging into her ribs and the sensitive insides of her arms, a secret he'd unfortunately discovered.

"Noooo," she cried, laughing, as he wrestled her so she was on her back on the sofa, and he was looming over her, each of her wrists in one of his hands in a cross against her chest. He grinned in victory.

"Now be a good little witch and tell me where I can find this photograph," he said. She shook her head.

"Am I supposed to be afraid of the big bad Auror?" she chuckled. Then, with a pop of her lips, "Nope." Then something in the air shifted, and she noticed his grin fade, his eyes becoming dark and dilated. He was so close to her she could feel the heat coming off him and his cologne invaded her senses. Everything around them seemed to go out of focus. She took shallow breaths. "What are you going to do about it?" she asked softly, completely lost as to what exactly she was talking about in that moment, but it mattered not as he suddenly lowered his lips to hers, sucking her lower lip into his mouth, and he was kissing her. Her stomach swooped violently, and as he released her wrists so he could brace himself above her, she lifted her arms and twined them around his neck.

The kiss was chaste, even a little hesitant but then she kissed him back and a frisson of electricity passed between them turning each kiss that followed more and more passionate. Sirius lost himself in the feel of her lips against his, their softness and firm but yielding pressure. She tasted like apples and English tea on the tip of his tongue, and she smelled – Godric she smelled good enough to eat. He felt her hands come up against his chest, delicately tracing the muscles there as her tongue explored his mouth. Gods her simple touch was reducing him to madness! He groaned into her mouth and she made a feminine sound of pleasure that went straight to his groin.

When they pulled apart both of them were breathing hard, and he looked into her eyes as he lifted a hand and slowly, reverently stroked her cheek with the back of his knuckles, swallowing hard. His touch was so gentle, his eyes so tender the moment almost felt more intimate than when they'd kissed.

"Sirius, what is this?" she said softly, captivated by his eyes.

"It's good," he answered honestly, his voice husky. His eyes dropped to her lips. "Can I kiss you again?"

"Yes please," she breathed, and he smiled as he dipped his mouth to hers again. The feel of his stubble scraping sensually against her soft skin and the scent that was all him – spicy, fresh, masculine – was making her lightheaded. Hermione pressed her palms against his chest, and without speaking, without one allowing their lips to leave the others, they moved together so that he was sitting on the sofa with her straddling his lap.

Completely, utterly ablaze, they continued kissing, achingly slow and exploratory. His fingers had snuck up under her top to the curve of her waist. She was so soft, smooth and fit perfectly in his hands. He could feel the rougher skin of her scar under one thumb. "You're perfect," he exhaled breathlessly between kisses. When she began rocking against him he grabbed her hips and puller her closer so her center brushed against his straining erection. It was like throwing petrol on an open fire. Suddenly his mouth was traveling down her jaw to suck on the skin of her neck. She had her fingers in his hair, pulling lightly and she was gasping as they pushed against one another.

Somewhere in a haze at the back of Sirius' mind, warning bells were going off. Too fast, he thought, they were going too fast and yet he had never felt more helpless to stop himself than he did in that moment.

He would never know if it was a blessing or curse from the gods themselves, what happened next. As though some deity had heard his panicked thoughts, there was a sudden "whoosh" sound and Remus and Tonks emerged from the Floo, not two feet from the entwined pair.
There was a single, frozen, deer-in-the-headlights moment between the four of them, then Hermione scrambled off Sirius and he swore, grabbing the nearest cushion and placing it over his crotch in a hopelessly obvious move. Tonks, who was normally unflappable when it came to the subject of sex, apparently drew the line at seeing her cousin aroused. She held her palms up to the sides of her face like blinkers and walked out of the room.

Remus, on the other hand, was looking at the pair with a very uncharacteristic smirk. "Huh," he said. "Can't say I've ever seen a Chudley Cannons t-shirt have that effect before."

Sirius felt regret for every time he had ever poked, prodded and teased poor old Moony.

A/N: Ok, so I have no idea what warnings I should be putting on this fic as we go along. I felt this scene was pretty tame but I don't understand how to make the distinction between smut and lemons. If anyone can point me towards a resource/information that's actually clear on this, please PM me. Thanks!