The crew walked through the streets of Beller with their giant bag of cat food, the agents of Cipher Pol W-2 in tow. Stomachs began to rumble.
"Miss Shaska," Zinnia began. "Could we please stop to get some food? We have acquired the proper currency for this island."
Shaska crossed her arms and looked back at Zinnia. "I'm getting awfully peckish too, but I'm not sure I trust the food around here…"
"Peckish…? But you do not have a beak, Miss Shaska…" Zinnia said.
"Do… do you understand anything figurative…?" Isha asked, unwrapping another lollipop.
The clouds began to roll in over the city of Beller. A normal sized pencil fell from the sky and hit Ren in the head.
"Pencil…? What…?" she asked, picking it up.
Then another pencil fell. And another. And another. Until a full blown pencil rain storm was upon the city. The members of Worldwide Smoke not carrying the cat food bag ducked under it to get out of the pencil rain, lest they be hit in a sensitive area with a sharp pencil lead.
"I'm over this messed up place," said Zeimaru.
"Join the club," Zeiko added.
"I would like to join this club," said Zinnia.
"Well, damn, we need to find somewhere to hide to get out of this… pencil rain…" said Shaska.
"'E Eats Everything Eatery'…" said Johnson, noticing a nearby sign. "How about that place?"
Shaska rubbed her belly as her stomach rumbled again. She sighed and said "might as well…"
—
In Linnelton's underground factory, the Minus World propaganda songs continued to blare. The music was loud enough to drown out the screams of a poor worker who fell into a machine and died as a result.
Roxanne and Freddie continued to slave away making rifles, while Franco had been moved to the forge that was making swords, which was something he was better adapted to, given his status with only one arm. Rabbi Vole was also assembling rifles, continuing to whistle a tune against the Minus World agitprop music. Even as the guard whipped him, he continued to whistle his tune.
A guard approached Roxanne as she was assembling a rifle. He gave the Minus World salute when she finished, and she saluted back before working on her next rifle.
"ALL GLORY TO COMRADE VON ESENS!" she shouted over the music.
"KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK, COMRADE!" the guard shouted back with another salute.
As Roxanne assembled the rifles, she began to be able hear her own thoughts again.
"What…? What am I doing…?! This isn't right… no… it is… equality… a more equal world…"
She completely zoned out, assembling the rifles from pure muscle memory at this point.
"I must help create an equal world… the World Government is evil… but… what's this doubt I feel…?"
It was then that she began to have flashbacks.
"I know it's not much, but… I love you, Roxie…" called a familiar voice in her head.
"Will… will you be my wife…?"
Tears began pouring down Roxanne's face as she continued to assemble the rifles.
"Eeny, meeny, miney, moe," said another familiar voice in Roxanne's head. This voice was much less friendly, though, despite its cheery nature.
"Catch a tiger by the toe… if he hollers, let him go…"
Then, the key moment flashed in Roxanne's head, and she dropped the rifle she was assembling. Tears poured like a river from her eyes as she grabbed her head and began to whimper.
She saw, clear as day in her mind, the moment her beloved Andy was murdered by Balthasar von Rusila. She remembered everything: Rusila's nonchalant attitude about the affair, seeing his body in the morgue later, everything.
Her trance was broken by a whipping from a guard, who called "BACK TO WORK, COMRADE!"
Roxanne began haphazardly assembling rifles again as she choked back her tears.
"I have to get out of here… but how…?"
—-
Elsewhere in Linnelton, Ford walked through his palace, a palace far too big for a normal-sized man like him, while puffing on another Happy Happy Grass "cigarette". He blew smoke and giggled as he came to a room where a giant band was playing for a captive audience, all of whom were high on Happy Happy Grass.
The giant band sang their song, which also happened to introduce them to their fans by name.
"We're the Mesomesonians! Sarugo, Hanmura, Ashurba, and Giruga!"
On lead guitar and vocals was Sarugo, a giant in an ornate tunic with a standard purple toupee, a fake forehead, and a bushy beard. On rhythm guitar and backing vocals was Hanmura, a giant with spiky shoulder pads and his purple toupee forming a fringe that covered his right eye. Ashurba was on drums. His tunic didn't cover his torso, and his purple toupee was so large, it completely covered his eyes. Finally, on bass was Giruga, who wore a spiked helmet over his purple toupee. Of particular note was Giruga's bulging eyes.
The band finished their performance and headed backstage, where they found Ford sitting on top of a spare amplifier, puffing on his Happy Happy Grass.
"What's, ah… ah… how's it, ah, hanging, guys…?" he asked, blowing smoke. "How're my favorite, ah… henchmen…?"
Sarugo produced a pipe and a (relatively) small bag of Happy Happy Grass and packed the pipe. While this was happening, Ashurba spoke up, saying "what do you want, Ford?"
Ford stood up, though he was still nowhere near the giants' eye level. Sarugo lit the Happy Happy Grass, took a hit, and began passing the pipe around (though not before hacking up a lung due to taking too big a hit).
"You know full, ah… well, what's going on," said Ford. "There's… ah… government stooges on the, ah… island…"
"You acting like you're not a government stooge…?" asked Giruga, taking a hit of the grass. "Mister Warlord?"
"I mean real government, ah… stooges," Ford replied. "Cipher Pol W-2, to be, ah… exact…"
"Yeah, we heard," said Hanmura. "Gonna be sniffing around your books because you didn't pay your Heavenly Tribute."
"The equal… ah, utopia is upon us, boys…" Ford said, taking another puff. "My old crew… they, ah, didn't get it."
"That's why you killed them?" Ashurba asked.
"Ashurba… you know full well my, ah… power can instill a fate worse than, ah… death," Ford replied, holding up his hand. His fingertips began to glow a multitude of colors.
Ford snuffed his "cigarette" and stuffed it in his jacket pocket as the giants continued to pass their pipe around, their eyes becoming bloodshot. He continued with "my intel shows we have… ah… other interlopers on the, ah, island."
"Rufufu," Sarugo giggled as he blew smoke. "That's a funny word. In-ter-lo-pers…"
"What interlopers…?" Hanmura asked, taking the pipe from Sarugo.
"Worldwide, ah, Smoke," Ford calmly said. "Shaska the, ah, Squeeze is here…"
"Rufufu… I'd like to smoke worldwide…" Sarugo said, plopping his giant butt on the ground.
Giruga followed suit, sitting down and saying "you ever see Shaska? I'd like her to give me a squeeze…"
The band of giants began to giggle together. Ford snapped his fingers and said "focus, ah, guys… last I heard, von Esens had… ah, killed her. But I guess she's… ah, pretty freakin' tough. As my top guys, I'm gonna need you to… ah… be on guard in Linnelton in case either Worldwide, ah, Smoke or CPW-2 show up, ah, 'kay…?"
Hanmura puffed the pipe and said "you got it, boss" as he blew smoke.
Ford hopped down off the amp and said "heaven awaits, ah, all of us. Not much longer before Marie, ah, Jois lies in ruins, boys… Let's, ah… keep it together for the, ah, final stretch…"
He walked out of the backstage area, heading back to the main area of the palace.
After Ford left, Sarugo pulled out a giant-sized stick of gum and a knife.
"This is my last stick of gum, okay? I'm gonna cut it up so all of you can have some. Except for you, Ashurba… you said my toupee sucks. Not cool, dude," Sarugo explained, much to Ashurba's chagrin.
—
The ten strong crew of Worldwide Smoke entered E Eats Everything Eatery to get out of the pencil rain. Much like everything else on the island, the inside of the restaurant was massive. The giant hostess (wearing a purple toupee, naturally) looked down over her host's stand at the crew.
"Good afternoon, tiny people. I assume you're all here together?"
"Table for ten, yes," said Shaska.
The hostess looked at Zeiko and Zeimaru, who were still smoking their cigarettes. "This is a non-smoking establishment…"
The twins rolled their eyes and snuffed their cigarettes, and the crew followed the hostess to their table. After being provided with as many booster seats as the restaurant had, the crew sat down and began looking at their (gigantic) menus.
After looking over the menu, the crew began looking at each other.
"None… none of this food seems particularly appetizing," said Ren, wincing.
"Let's just… get the first thing that jumps out at us, darlings," said Lulupo. "And considering this is an island of giants, we'll probably be able to split a single order just fine."
The waitress came over to the table. "Are you tiny people ready to order? Or are you still deciding?"
"Can we just get a, uh… 'Ayn Rand Sandwich'…?" Shaska asked.
Without missing a beat, the giant waitress pulled out a metal can and a plate. She opened the can, and an unappetizing, congealed sandwich of some sort plopped out onto the plate.
"Would you like a glass of Conditions of the Working Class to go with that?" she asked.
The crew shot each other nervous and confused glances, before Shaska said "…we're good…"
The waitress sauntered off after an "enjoy". Schwarz hopped up onto the table, grabbed a handful of sandwich, and ate it.
After several weak chews and a half-hearted swallow, he said "this is just about the blandest thing I've ever eaten…"
"Y'know, considering the rest of this crazy island, 'bland' is an upgrade," said Johnson, also hopping on the table and taking a bite of the bland sandwich. The blandwich.
Zinnia took a bite of the sandwich and asked "what is an 'Ayn Rand'?"
The pencil rain storm continued to rage outside. As Worldwide Smoke continued to eat their sorry excuse for food, Shaska spoke up.
"Alright, so we know the plan after this storm lets up?"
"We're going to the dispensary," said Schwarz, having sat back down in his booster seat.
"Right, and we're gonna squeeze the owner for info on where he gets the stuff. If we can find where it's being produced, we can really stick it to the king by destroying his supply," said Shaska.
Zinnia opened her mouth to ask about what "squeeze" meant in this context, but Ren glared at her from her seat.
Isha reluctantly chewed on her portion of sandwich, then walked over to Shaska. "Are we actually gonna pay for this slop…?" she whispered.
"Y'know, normally I'm all for helping a small business," Shaska began. "…but this was just awful."
The crew members all looked at each other, then nodded and stood up on the table, making sure to grab the bag of cat food as well. They looked around, making sure no one was watching and that the pencil rain had stopped. No one was looking, and the rain had, in fact, stopped. The crew members nodded at each other again, and teleported out of the restaurant with one of Schwarz's portals, the giant bag of cat food in tow.
—-
Schwarz's portal dumped the crew out down the street from the restaurant. Worldwide Smoke hurriedly bolted as fast as they could in the opposite direction from where they had just dined and dashed.
"Ow. Ow. Ow," Shaska whined, pencils poking into her bare tentacle feet.
As they rounded a corner, Shaska attempted to hail a mink taxi. However, given her size relative to the general populace, no one was able to see her.
"Mrrr…" she growled, lowering her hand.
"Hmm… it seems we're too small for a mink taxi…" said Zeiko, lighting up a new cigarette.
It was then that Zeimaru began looking around. Sure enough, they were on Lincoln Street. And right above the crew was a sign reading "Too Tall Girl Grass Dispensary".
"Hey, everyone," he said, pointing upward.
"How… convenient," Shaska replied, pulling a pencil out of her foot. She turned to her subordinates and ordered "alright, most of you wait out here. Zeiko, Zeimaru, and Schwarz, you're coming with me."
The three she mentioned nodded, and they headed into the dispensary via one of Schwarz's portals.
—-
Like every other building on the island, the Happy Happy Grass dispensary was gigantic. Inside was shelf after shelf of glass jars filled with Happy Happy Grass of all different varieties, along with equipment to smoke it.
Behind the counter was an especially large giantess whose purple toupee was shaped into dreadlocks under a black beanie. She looked down at the four Worldwide Smoke members who just entered.
"Oh, hello. Welcome to my dispensary! We don't get a lot of tiny people around here!"
The twins hopped up onto the counter with their Moon Walk ability, while Shaska and Schwarz got up there with a portal. Zeiko and Zeimaru pulled out their badges and flashed them toward the giantess.
"Our names are Zeiko and Zeimaru," said the former, putting her badge away. "We come representing the government's Cipher Pol W-2 division."
"Is that so…?" the giantess asked, leaning forward and resting her head on her hand. "Well, 'agents', I'll have you know my grass is perfectly legal under World Government law."
"That's not what we're here for," said Shaska, looking the giantess in the eye and crossing her arms. "We're here because we want to know who your supplier is."
The giantess showed a look of surprise on her face. "On what grounds?"
"We think your supplier might be up to some shady shit," said Schwarz. "We're here to… get to the bottom of it."
"Is that so…?" the giantess asked again. "And what happens if I don't tell you who my supplier is…?"
"So you're saying you do have something to hide?" Zeimaru asked, hands on his hips.
"I'm not saying anything to government pigs, is what I'm saying," the giantess replied, a sly smile on her face.
The twins and their mother each cracked their knuckles. "See, if you don't tell us," Zeiko began.
"We'll have to beat it out of you," Shaska continued.
"And failing that, we'll surely find documents linking you to your supplier somewhere on the premises here," Zeimaru finished.
The giantess stood back up and picked up a giant shotgun that was hidden under the counter. "Get the hell out of my dispensary," she growled, cocking the gun and pointing it at the crew.
"Alright, the hard way it is," Shaska casually said. "Kids, I'm curious to see you fight together. Make momma proud!"
The twins glared at their mother, then teleported upward with a Shave technique, then flipped and kicked the air with the force of a hurricane.
"TWIN SECRET TECHNIQUE! TEMPEST SCISSORS!" they called in unison. Razor sharp gusts of wind shot from their legs in a criss cross pattern, cutting through the giantess' shotgun like a hot knife through butter.
The giantess dropped the shotgun in a panic at the agents' raw power, then held up her hands in surrender as the twins landed back on the counter.
"Okay, okay…" she said. "You proved your point. I'll tell you what you want to know, okay?"
"Good answer," Shaska said with a smile.
The giantess groaned and said "all the Happy Happy Grass in the world comes from one guy: this island's leader, Seven Ford."
The twins' interest was piqued at this. Shaska stroked her chin and muttered "interesting…"
"The grass itself doesn't do anything until it's refined by his Devil Fruit ability. There's a greenhouse for it somewhere in the capital city of Linnelton. Don't ask me for the exact location, though. I genuinely don't know."
"Ford's under investigation for tax evasion," Zeimaru explained, adjusting his tie. "But we've begun to suspect that he may have ties to the world conquering cult, Minus World. Any idea about that?"
The giantess began to sweat. "I have nothing else to say to you, pigs. Go away."
"Thank you for your time," Schwarz said with a bow. He teleported the crew out of the dispensary.
As soon as Worldwide Smoke left, the giantess rushed over to the store's transponder snail and dialed up Ford.
"Hey, boss?" she said. "They know… the government and Shaska the Greedy are gunning for you."
TO BE CONTINUED