DAY 96: CLARKE

Hilltop looks different than Alexandria, but it comes with a similar vibe. As soon as we walk through those gates, I can feel it. How this is a safe place, in many ways. How it comes with people who look after themselves and each other.

It's not just about the walls. It's about what's behind them.

Followed by Madi and Jaime, I start to make my way in the appointed direction. Despite the fact that they stay a little behind, I can hear how Madi tries to describe our surroundings to her new companion.

"Opposite to the gate, towards the rear, is a large house," she tells him. "Clarke, what's it called again?"

"A mansion," I answer her over my shoulder, unable to suppress my proud smile.

"Right," she goes on, "A mansion. It's three stories high, with some steps to the front door and a balcony above it. To our right is a line of trailers, where people seem to live. From here I count six of them. To our left, behind some sheds and huts, is a water tower. They've also got some crops growing, just like outside the walls. Here, feel this, it's the fence that indicates the edge of the field."

I let them be, let her tell him about every detail on our way, yet when I notice I'm about to get out of earshot I stop and turn around. They're standing still again, about thirty feet behind me, next to a horse stable. We're in no hurry, but I'm about to call them anyway, as they can do more exploring later on, when I'm being called myself.

"Clarke?" I hear from a distance, "Is that you?"

I look to my right, expecting to see one of Lexa's—or in this case Alicia's—people. Yet to my surprise it's someone else, although still a familiar face.

"Magna!" I cheer, genuinely happy to see her.

"Look at you," Magna grins as she gets closer, "Back on both feet!"

By pointing out my recovery, I realize I haven't seen her since that day I broke my leg. Which feels like yesterday, but just as well like a lifetime ago - so much has happened since.

"Time heals all wounds," I smile, right before we briefly embrace. When she lets go of me, she raises her brows.

"Does it?"

Still sharp as a pencil. I pull a face - something in the line of "Okay, moving on..." - and Magna helps me out by actually doing so.

"How'd you get here?" she asks, "And don't say by walking - though I'm happy you can actually do that again!"

"It's a long story. Not all bad though. If you don't mind, I'll tell you another time."

"Sure," she shrugs, casual and carefree. "So, where's your other half?"

Subconsciously I glare at the gate, then back at her. "She's on her way."

Her bright smile quickly dissolves, only to be replaced by a concerning frown. She tilts her head. "She's alright though?"

"Oh yes, she's fine. Really," I nod, though highly aware I can't leave it like this. I step a little closer towards her and lower my voice, even though Jaime and Madi are still distracted by those horses. "She's just... She's not... She's not Heda anymore."

Magna stays quiet for a second, then takes me by surprise by simply shrugging her shoulders again.

"Good for her," she just says.

"Yeah," I agree, nodding some more, "It really seems so."

She crosses her arms. Though I do believe she's okay with the subject, I can tell talking about it still comes with at least some discomfort. "So who's the unlucky bastard who's got to deal with it now? With the Flame, I mean?" she asks.

"That would be Raven," I tell her, and then quickly, as I catch a look of shock crossing her face, "No, not like that! We gave it to her for research. She's keeping it, not carrying it."

Before I know it Magna smacks me on the arm, a little harder than necessary, yelling, "Christ! Don't ever scare me like that again, will you!"

I raise my hands, quickly apologizing, when Madi and Jaime join us. "Everything okay here?" Madi asks, already in the highest state of alert.

Magna turns towards her and flashes her a wide grin. "Hey Madi, good to see you again. We're all good - except for a minor heart attack Clarke just gave me," she winks. "Who's your friend?"

"Oh, this is Jaime," Madi answers, as she rests her hand on the boy's arm again, "Jaime, this is Magna. She's a friend of ours."

Magna smiles at him, even though he can't see it. "Welcome," she says, now looking at all three of us. "I'm glad you finally managed to get in."

"Me too," I agree wholeheartedly. "Though it's just for a few days. Like I said, long story. We'll catch up soon, yeah?"

"Yeah, of course," Magna nods. "Any time. Miko and I are staying over there, in that greyish trailer. Come find me when it suits you."

I promise her that I will and turn around, about to continue my way to the tents, but Madi's voice stops me in my tracks. When I look over my shoulder, curious to find out what stopped them, I see how she gently pulls Jaime's arm to make him follow us. He's not moving though.

"Jaime, come on," she tries once more, but he seems too distracted, too focused on something else to hear or answer her.

It's hard to tell because of his dark sunglasses, but it looks like he's staring - that is, if he would be able to. His gaze is on Magna, who's visibly uncomfortable by it. She doesn't move away though.

"Can I... help you with anything?" she asks when he stays still.

Jaime doesn't say anything. Instead he takes a step forward, followed by a second one. The moment he can tell she's within his reach, he slowly lifts his hand and moves it towards her face. I know what he's doing, I know that this is his way to get a picture of what she must look like. He did it to us, too, the day after we met. Although with us, he did ask first.

Knowing Magna a little by now, I have to admit it amazes me that she doesn't smack him to the ground. She doesn't even step back. She just stares back at him, in this flabbergasted kind of way. Maybe she knows what he's doing? Or maybe she's just stunned.

"Come on, man. They're waiting for us," I try, but it's like we're not even here.

All he can see, in his way, is Magna.

"I'm not sorry," he finally speaks up, though in the softest way. "I'm not. You have to believe me."

Magna looks more confused by the minute - and I can't blame her. "Sorry? Sorry for what?" she frowns, "What did you do?"

"I would have lost anyway. At least you still got a chance," he goes on, his voice almost hypnotic now. "Did you take it? Did you win?"

Opening her mouth again, Magna starts stammering, although no actual words come out.

Jaime's fingertips keep exploring her face, gentle and with precision. He traces her cheek bones, the sharp lines of her jaws, the bridge of her nose.

"You've grown up," he states, a hint of marvel in his voice.

With a shaky breath, Magna exhales the air from her lungs and retracts her head; swiftly, as if she finally knows how to move again.

As he lowers his hands, she moves hers up towards his face, just like he just did. Yet instead of touching it, she takes off his sunglasses. She narrows her eyes, searching for clues, but his dull, white eyes lost all personality they once might have had. If she's looking for any recognition, she won't find it in there. And he knows it.

"Close your eyes," Jaime tells her, "Watch with your heart."

Yet too astonished by the thought, by the possibility alone, she can't. She simply can't look away from him.

"No," she breathes. "There's no..."

"I guess I got a little older, too," he shrugs, and I swear I can actually hear amusement in his voice.

Magna doesn't share it. All she can do is stare at him, shaking her head in disbelieve. I've never seen her this confounded, which is why I step closer to her, come to her aid, despite the doubt that it may be useful, or even smart.

"Magna?" I warily ask, "What's going on?"

She turns to me, rather abruptly. Her eyes look bewildered.

"Is this a joke? Is this some kind of sick..." She doesn't finish, reading our shared confusion on my face for what it is. After taking a deep breath, she continues, slightly calmer, "Is he— Are you guys saying you found my... my..."

I shake my head. "No. No, I'm not saying anything. I have no clue what's going on."

But her eyes aren't on me anymore, they're already back on Jaime, and when she suddenly grabs his cap off, swipes his long curls away from his face and lifts his chin for further inspection, I fall quiet all together.

He lets it happen. He just stands there when she moves even closer, when she studies every square inch of his face, until she can no longer hold that one question inside her, that one name that she has always carried with her.

The name of her little brother.

... ...