I'm back! After re-reading and editing the first 52 chapters, which was a LOT, I can finally present to you: a brand new chapter! Though, truth be told, it's not that long, since I'm not even sure I still have an audience left.

Anyway, let's start with a short summary, since it's been such a long time:

We started off with Alicia trying to survive the zombie apocalypse, when suddenly remembering her first/previous/other (just pick one) life as Lexa, Commander of the Grounders, when meeting Clarke again. Picking up pretty much where they'd left off—deeply in love, that is—they reunited almost straight away and started thinking about a safe and happy life together, far away from (the responsibilities of) their past. In the meantime they met Magna en Jesus, who they both knew as Luna and Aden.
For a short while, Oceanside seemed the place to be, but then Madi got bitten by a walker and they had to make a space trip to save her. At that time Madi was still the commander, but hated it deeply, so Lexa stepped up and took over (or well, pretended to).
Once back on the ground they went to Alexandria, where Raven wanted to work science with Eugene, and Lexa wanted to ask permission to let Wonkru stay in the woods. Due to Clarke's broken leg they had to stay longer than planned, but nobody really cared cause hey, they were in Alexandria. Yet the discovery of Madi being her sister made Lexa lose it, bringing all the issues of her past and current identity to the surface. Distancing herself from Clarke (and the Lexa part within her), she spiraled down, but—thank god for all of us—they made it through.
As they did, they were visited by Strand, telling them Madison might still be alive. Though hardly believing it, they decided to search for her, yet not after visiting Wonkru again and telling them Lexa had died.
They made the long trip to Lake Erie, miraculously enough found Madison and told her about their relationship and the vaccines, but not about Lexa. Madison, now taking care of some boy named Jaime, who happened to be Luna's long lost brother Phoenix (yup, small world), decided they'd find Abby, so she could get protected as well.
So leaving Alicia/Lexa in Hilltop, since she's supposed to be dead, Clarke, Madi and Madison now head to Wonkru's campsite, where Madison hopes to score her vaccine...

DAY 97: CLARKE

It feels weird being without Lexa. Even weirder than being with her mother, who I still hardly know. We said our goodbyes barely six hours ago, and I already miss her like I'm missing a piece of myself. I try telling myself I've spent most of my life without her, doing fine, so what's a few more days, but for some reason that only makes it worse. It really is strange how quick you get used to someone being around you. Being a part of you.

"Clarke?"

The way Madi pulls my sleeve tells me this isn't the first time she's calling for me. Without slowing down, I look next to me.

"I'm sorry," I tell her, "What is it?"

Madi points into the distance. "They're gone."

She's serious, but her words make me laugh anyway. "I know it seems like that from over here, I remember quite well from my first visit, but you can actually see the camp from right—" Reaching the top of a low hillock, I abruptly fall quiet.

She's right. The ship is gone. The camp is gone.

They are gone.

"We've got a problem?" Madison asks, showing up beside me and reading our baffled faces.

"I uhm..." Still blinking in confusion, I turn to her. "I don't know."

She frowns. "You don't know if there's a problem?"

"That's right," I nod, "So I'm going to find out. Alone."

Madison knows I can't bring her into the camp. Not just like that. I told her my people are very much on guard, not trained to question, but to shoot. Which isn't true, except for Diyoza and her prisoner army maybe, but it sure makes more sense than having to clarify why everyone keeps asking me about the loss of some girl named Lexa. Some girl who clearly meant a lot to me. While I was dating—and thus cheating on?—her daughter. I've talked myself out of a lot of things, but I really can't think of any explanation for this.

I turn to Madi. "You'd better wait here with Madison. In case trouble comes your way."

My real worry, of course, lays in the chance that Madison could be the actual trouble. As said, I don't know her that well yet, but my instinct tells me not to underestimate her, or her obedience.

She nods, and as they both take a seat on some moss covered log, I start making my way through the trees, avoiding the many twigs and branches that form a natural barrier. It's only when I reach the open area that I notice it's not completely empty. All tents as well as the ship are gone, but on the far edge of the glade someone has built a simple hut.

As I cautiously approach it, that someone—or so I assume—opens the door.

It's Niylah.

The moment she sees me, recognition dawns and her face lights up. "Clarke!"

Greatly relieved to spot an old friend, I rush towards her. We embrace, tightly, and when we do, I feel comfort despite the current chaos in my brain. "I knew you'd come back," she sighs into my hair.

Letting go of her, I open my mouth to respond, but she already turns on her heels, towards the hut. "Octavia! Come see who's here!"

Before I know it, Octavia joins us.

"So you were right," she says, though not to me.

I narrow my eyes, not understanding. "Right about what?"

"Niylah insisted on waiting for you. Just like Bell," Octavia shrugs, "They were sure you would return sooner or later."

Still confused, my eyes dart from one to the other. "I don't get it. Did everyone else... leave?"

This time Octavia remains silent, which doesn't suit her. Niylah doesn't say anything either, but takes my hand instead. "Come," she just says, "let's get inside."

Their shelter is dimly lit by a small fire in the corner, warming a pot hanging above it. I smell woodsmoke and burnt pine cones, but also something less heavy. Wildflowers. And herbs. I recognize the table on which we helped Yumiko with her gunshot wound and some seats taken from the ship. Niylah directs me to one of them.

"After you left, Indra and Bellamy informed us about Lexa's... fate," she starts to tell, sitting down next to me. "The loss of the Flame, and the free choice that came with it, was liberating for some, but unsettling for others. Quite a few turned to Octavia again."

"Never again though!" Octavia comments from right behind her.

"Within days, people started to get restless. By this time, it had become clear to most of us that this might not be the ideal place to settle down - despite the permission you guys managed to obtain," Niylah goes on. "No angry neighbors is a real plus, but without resources it is actually impossible to sustain here. Especially when you are with two hundred people."

I quietly nod. So far, everything makes sense, whether I like it or not.

"Diyoza was the first to leave, all on her own. Wanting to be out of these woods before her baby announced itself. Abby tried to convince her to stay, so she could help her, but there was no stopping her. She departed southward. We haven't heard from her since."

"How about her army?" I ask, but I already know. She left them up there, most likely forever.

Octavia, now taking a chair as well, picks up where Niylah left off.

"Indra and Gaia followed soon after, the majority of the Grounders joining them. They headed west."

Curious, I tilt my head a little, unable to hide my surprise. "You didn't consider joining them?"

She shakes her head, showing me a weak smile. "Not for a second. I've learned my lesson. Realized who I am - or want to be. What I broke, but most of all want to fix. Even when it's hard."

It's not hard to guess what she's talking about. She and her brother have a very complicated past, and they didn't end things on a good note before going into cryo, but they're still family - of each other, and in a way of us, too. It also sounds like the Blodreina days are definitely over. Something I want to hear more about, but now seems not the time.

"At least you two are talking again," Niylah gently tells her former leader, before looking at me again. "While more and more people left, we started making our own plans. After Bellamy had returned from Alexandria he'd told our inner circle about it, and we decided to join Raven and Shaw there."

"Who's we, exactly?"

"Bellamy, Echo, Octavia, Murphy, Emori, Abby and me," she sums up in one breath, making me sit up in wonder.

"Wait, Abby agreed to join you?!"

"She did," Niylah nods, "She started to accept that Kane would never wake up from his coma, or survive if he did. She did want to go back up one more time though. To get all the medical equipment we could use down here, but most of all to say goodbye."

I swallow, feeling sad for Mom that she had to go through this alone. If only I'd been here to make that final trip with her.

"So... she did all that... and is with Raven now... right? Then why are you still here?"

Taking a deep breath, Niylah shifts in her seat. "Because we wanted to make sure that you got the chance to... to find out what happened."

"What do you mean, what happened?" I question, my voice suddenly on edge, "You just told me. People moved away. They have spread. And you... we... our peo—"

"Clarke, there was an accident," Octavia stops me, making me face her again. "Maybe the pilots weren't as experienced as Raven and Shaw, maybe there was a technical problem, but... the dropship crashed."

I stare at her. Why is it so dark in here? And seriously, what's with that smell? Has it been this quiet the whole time? Madison is still out there. Maybe I should—

The tender touch of Niylah's hand on top of mine finally makes me blink.

"We found the wreck about two miles north, with everyone still on board. There were no survivors." Clearing her throat, she softly squeezes my hand. "Clarke, your mother died."

... ...