Edward and I walked into our first period together and instantly drew attention. We had been avoiding each other like the plague for the entire first semester, now his hand was grasping mine and he carried my books. When I glanced back I couldn't help but notice the smug smirk that had stolen his stoic mask. Got him. Ms. Hanley's English room was a buzz until she walked in. I would kill to have Edward's ability to hear the thoughts in the room now, though I could guess most if not all were speculating what had happened over the weekend.
We had done exams before Christmas break, making this week the easiest of the year. turned the lights off and powered up the projector, of course we were still going to watch something educational, so in went The Crucible to prepare us for the next semester's learning module. Edward and I scooched our desks together and soon our arms became tangled on the desk as I laid my head on his shoulder. "I hate this movie." Edward whispered into my ear, his breath cold against my skin.
"I would too if I had to watch it a million times as a sophomore." I flicked my eyes from the opening credits to his face, a teasing smile growing on my lips involuntarily.
"About fifty you goofball." Edward laughed, laying his head on mine. "And you try to stay awake this hour."
"Not fair, you're always awake." I poked his arm before lacing my fingers together with his.
He scoffed in return and shot back a quickly whispered answer as the opening credits began to roll. "And I will be in misery for it."
"Dramatic." I rolled my eyes playfully before settling in to watch the movie.
"I told you!" Edward threw his hands up defensively as he walked me to choir.
"Oh my god, I had no idea a movie could make me wish I was sleepwalking." I groaned as we stopped at my locker to swap my English binder for my French.
"I should have put money on you not enjoying that movie." He shook his head, almost in disbelief but mostly in defeat.
"I didn't fall asleep though, so jokes on you." I stuck my tongue out. "I suffered out of spite."
"That you did." He laughed and took my French binder from my hands despite my protests. "I'll keep this until next period."
"Fine." I grabbed his shirt and pulled myself up to him in the middle of the busy music hall. "Then I'll keep this." With a quick and sure movement I pecked a kiss on his lips in front of everyone.
"Oh, you're evil." Edward laughed as I pulled away, the hall's regular drone ticking up just a notch to a dull roar as excitement and rumors began to spread around us.
"I learned from the best." I smiled as I backed away to the choir doors. Rose. The look he shot me as I closed the door told me everything I needed to know. He had heard my thoughts, and I would pay for it later. Bring it. I thought cheekily as I spun and made my way to my seat in the Mezzo Soprano section of the choir.
When choir was finally over I bounded out the door and found Edward lounging against the wall waiting for me. I felt the grin grow on my face as I crossed the hall to him. "Is the day almost over? I want to go home." I propped my chin on his bicep and smiled up at him.
"Not even close." He laughed, throwing an arm over my shoulder and spinning me to face the direction of our French class.
"School is so boring though." I groaned, weaving my arm around his back as we walked.
"But you only graduate once." I got the sense he could feel the look I gave him because his mouth broke into a smile and he amended his statement. "As a human, and for the first time."
"But that means I can only skip school so many times before I have no school left to skip." I pointed at him like I had just delivered the most important piece of information.
"That's not how that works if you want to actually graduate." Edward chided as we rounded the corner and passed the Spanish class, setting this hall ablaze with whispers as we did so.
"I passed all my exams." I grumbled, ignoring the uptick in noise that was almost identical to how the music hall had sounded.
Edward was quiet for a moment, clearly listening to the rumors that were flying around us, but then just smiled and shook his head as he steered me into 's class. "And you still want to go to college, right?"
"Yeah…" I sighed and looked at the desks, new seating arrangements were starting today. Quickly I moved my hand from Edward's side to his hand and dragged him to the back of the class where three empty seats remained. Before I could sit in the far right one Emmett swung into it and grinned at me.
"I need my Ara time too. I missed out for almost a year." Emmett grinned, his teeth flashing as I settled into the middle seat.
"Fine, but the moment I catch you cheating off my paper I'm going to send Esme after you." I pointed at him with a serious look just barely covering the playful threat.
"Well then, I guess I'll just make sure you don't catch me." Emmett countered, flipping his binder open and smiling smugly.
"Good luck with that." Edward said from over my head as he climbed into the seat on my left.
"Bonjour!" said at the front of the class, a cruel smile twisting on his face as the whole class responded with the mandatory Bonjour. After a moment he took a deep breath and continued, "J'espère que vous avez tous passé de bonnes vacances." And thus began the longest hour of my Monday morning- the pissing match between the teacher and Edward as continued to try to stump him. Learning French in this class was merely a byproduct of Edward showing up our teacher on a daily basis.
Finally the bell rang and we were dismissed and sent to our lunch period. Somehow though, on our way to the cafeteria wound up on Edward's back, but the more I thought about it the more I realized it was a direct result of me complaining about having to walk all the way there. Either way I laughed my ass off the whole way as Edward bobbed and weaved through the crowd at a human pace, nearly knocking Tyler Crowley and Mike Newton over along the way.
When Edward set me down at the lunch table, he pretended to be winded for a few minutes while the rest of the group filtered in. When Gaia made it up to the table she looked back and forth between Edward and I with curious and happy eyes. "So," she finally spoke, "Paul is bringing me lunch tomorrow because he has a shorter school day for… work." Gaia glanced around to take note of those who weren't in the loop that were in earshot. "So I'm going to dip out of the yearbook a bit early, we're going to eat at the picnic tables outside though if you want to join us."
"Noted." I smiled back, already knowing the million questions she was going to ask me on our way to history.
My lunch table had changed drastically from the beginning of the year in just one day. I had sat down at my usual spot, Edward followed suit by sitting beside me. Gaia plopped down on my other side, and in the spot Angela had moved to post break up, Alice sat down and pulled Jasper down beside her. They both now say directly across the circular table from me, and in the space left between Gaia and Jasper, Emmett and Rose clattered their trays and took up residence. Only one chair remained, that of which positioned itself between Edward and Alice, both of whom made it clear with body language alone that the chair was to remain empty.
Anxiety over ousting Ang from the lunch table rippled through my body, the last thing I wanted to do was make her feel unwanted. Hell I had spent two months avoiding Edward as much as physically possible specifically because I didn't want to bring her any kind of pain. She was never a rebound or a pit stop, my heart still bled from the wound our parting left behind, but my life had to continue. She wasn't safe with me, and accepting that was probably going to save her life.
While the turmoil bubbled inside my heart, Edward looked at me with sad eyes. I knew he could hear, or at least glean the contents though Jasper, what hid behind my eyes. If he continued to look at me like that I wouldn't stay hidden for long.
The anxiety must have been far too much for Jasper to handle, because a moment later I was hit with a tidal wave of calm. When I turned my attention towards Jasper I was met with an intense stare. At the same moment Angela walked in, Jessica and Lauren at her side, involved in a joyous conversation. The wave of emotion I was receiving from Jasper intensified for a moment as I felt my chest physically cave in from the crushing heart ache. She never needed me. The realization hit. I made it so she had no need for me. If a vampire could sweat then Jasper would be sweating bullets at this point. It's my own fault. I came to the conclusion after a minute of calming myself. I didn't want her heart to break. I owed her this happiness, but she owes me none. I steeled my resolve and shoved my own hurt feelings aside, Jasper relaxing in my peripheral vision as I watched Ang enter the food line with the friends she had before she ever fell for me. She will be okay. I will be okay. I took a deep calming breath.
Finally tearing my eyes away from them, I pinned my gaze to my hands, that of which were sitting in my lap. Somehow in the single minute since we sat down I had grabbed Edward's hand and was squeezing so hard that my own knuckles had turned white. My whole hand was stiff as I loosened my grip, my breath evening out after a few more deep breaths, and Jasper's effect on me slowly ebbing away as I replaced it with my own emotions again. When I pulled my eyes up again, I met Edward's, and in that moment it didn't matter that I wasn't like him and couldn't read minds, I could read his.
As it turned out, Edward's next class was study hall, so naturally he skipped it and sat hidden on the bleachers in the gymnasium. I sat out on the activity of today, much to Coach Hunt's pleasure, as basketball was typically when myself and others became injured. I made my way up the bleachers to the top, settling down in the darker corner, and a second later I felt a brush of air right before the slight tickle of cold fingers drifting against my jawline sent a shiver down my spine. "Ready to talk?" His voice was like liquid the way it poured around me.
"About?" I tipped my chin forward and pecked a soft kiss to his lips, now thoroughly distracted.
"You choose." Edward spoke after a moment, likely hesitating from my once again bold act of a public kiss.
I knew at this point I wasn't getting out of a conversation, so I stuck out my bottom lip out as I played with the hem of my shirt. After a couple minutes of fiddling I looked up and met Edward's eyes, resigning to the topic of discussion. "I really don't know what is left to discuss."
"How about, why are you sleepwalking now?" Edward shifted his body so he was facing me more directly, his legs now on either side of me as we stayed in our tiny corner of the bleachers.
"I don't know." I shrugged and avoided his gaze. "My dad said this used to happen in the past. I was going to talk to him tonight about it."
His voice was thick with concern as he furrowed his brow and stared at me. "What do you mean used to happen?"
"That's what I'm trying to figure out." I shrugged and sighed. "Apparently it stopped on its own, so maybe I'll get lucky in a few nights and it will go away."
"I still don't like it." Edward shook his head, turning his gaze outward to the gym as I watched him out of the corner of my eye. "What are the dreams? Do you remember them?"
"Look, I really would rather just enjoy what little happiness I can squeeze out of the school day, can we please talk about this tonight?" I heaved a frustrated sigh. "Can we please just pretend that last night didn't happen?"
After a few moments Edward sighed and pulled me toward him gently. I crashed my back against his chest and tipped my head back to rest it on his collar bone. A second later he had procured his phone and held it in front of us, and a few seconds later he had opened Netflix and was starting up the BBC Sherlock. My heart swelled as he did so, and I obtained his free hand and began to delicately trace lines down his fingers to his wrist. As I did so I froze, my eyes noticing an odd scar that I had never remembered. He must have noticed what I was looking at because I felt a kiss press to the top of my head. "It's nothing."
"When did this happen?" I asked, though I feared I already knew the answer. When he didn't respond immediately I traced the scar gently with each of my fingers then finally spoke. "It's my fault… isn't it."
"I would hardly blame it on you." He spoke gently into my hair, dropping his phone into my lap before moving his hand to snake around my waist and pull me into a close hug.
"But it was, wasn't it? This was because of that night, the one in the woods." I bit my lip as I stared at his hand. A wound that I hadn't ever mended or tended to began aching deep in my chest. The slice of pain that came from that night, the scars that hid beneath my hair, the permanent reminders of a series of events that had derailed Edward and I. It was easy to pretend it didn't happen when I couldn't see those scars, but his was so prominent.
"When she ripped me away from you, she got me in the process, Emmett had been the one to break her off from me." He rested his chin gently on top of my head before continuing. "But I am okay, it is barely a scratch in the grand scheme."
I twisted my face in apprehension as I continued to stare at his hand, the episode of Sherlock (BBC) playing softly in my lap. After another moment of silence I finally sighed and closed my eyes, bringing his hand up to my mouth and gently kissing the scar, an apology far overdue on my end.
After that I half heartedly watched the episode while cuddling on the bleachers. In hindsight I probably shouldn't have been making my ass numb on the bleachers while cuddling an ice cube, but I did, and now I had to make my way to History. Halfway there Gaia intercepted me, making my only solo journey from one class to another no more. Edward had regretfully moved on from walking me to this class since his was on the opposite side of the school.
"If you don't give me all the juicy details I might have to kill you." She pointed a pencil at me like it was a weapon.
"I mean there aren't a ton of juicy details." I shrugged as I looked at her. "I just don't think I can pretend to hate him anymore. Fake it till you make it doesn't seem to really work here."
"Well I coulda told you that." Gi rolled her eyes, lowering her weaponized pencil threat, hugging her books to her chest as she did. "Is that really what it was?"
"I don't know Gi… emotions were high, it was late, I was basically dying of frostbite." I flipped my hair from my face and sighed. "We didn't even have a big grand discussion, I don't think I could if I needed to." I paused as we threaded through a couple clusters of people. "There is just so much that's happened that I don't think one conversation can take all of it into consideration." I finished quickly as we crossed into history and ended the conversation.
Another new seating arrangement awaited us. The desks were arranged in groups of four today, and to surprise no one, Alice had commandeered a group towards the back of the classroom and waved us over. "I'm not an expert, but I think they could consider this cheating." Gi leveled her gaze at Jasper specifically, a playful smirk on her face as she did so. Somehow, after all this time I had spent avoiding the Cullen's like they were the plague, Gaia had gotten to know them and had gotten closer to them. My heart swelled at such a reality, and in the corner of my eye I saw Jasper smile a little bit wider as well as relax into his seat a little deeper. It was yet another reminder that the emotions had such a physical effect on him, and I felt an intense need to protect him, but from what I didn't know. His eyes flicked to me, a small smile playing on his lips for a moment before he looked back to Gi.
"It's only cheating if you make it that way." He joked back, throwing his arm over Alice's shoulder.
"I don't think that's how this works." Gi flopped down into a desk, and I couldn't help but follow. These really were my people now, and I can't help but be incredibly grateful for how well they all fit together.
By the time I had all of my stuff gathered at the end of history Edward was already at the door. He smiled at me and we took the relatively short walk to Home Ec together, for once I was excited to be his partner in this class.
The smell of the last class's confectionery still permeated the air, and honestly the whole room felt alive. The entire last hour was full of buzz, it seemed like the general one that had followed Edward and I through the day had finally congealed into a swarming mass of whispers. I of course took advantage of it and pulled on my inherent showboat nature, which only made Edward roll his eyes and smile more. "You thrive off of their jealousy, I swear." He whispered in my ear as I worked on my worksheet.
"I mean, they were going to talk regardless, might as well give them something real to talk about." I mumbled back, biting my lip to stop myself from grinning.
When the bell finally rang to release us from class for the final time on this eventful Monday, I found myself playfully racing Edward to my car. He was bound by human eyes and therefore forced to play along, and that somehow just made it all the more fun. I opened my stride as soon as I hit the parking lot, full out running as Edward was hot on my heels. I could see my car, it was just two rows away now, and the wind was ripping my hair back from my face as I slipped between vehicles.
One. Two. Three steps.
I stretched my hand out with only a step left before I won- and then out of nowhere I was careening through the air. I had slipped on some ice that was just slick enough to send me directly to my ass. Well, not directly, I did hit the car first. Edward was there in a second, worry searing deep in the planes of his face, but all I could do was laugh through the ache. I was going to have a door handle shaped bruise on my cheek and probably a few bruises elsewhere, but otherwise I was okay. "I win." I groaned as he helped me up.
When I looked around the lot to see if anyone had seen my wipe out other than Edward, I made eye contact with Emmett. He was in hysterics, laughing so hard I would almost think he was going to pee. "He's never going to let you live that down." Edward said with a laugh as he followed my gaze.
"I don't think he will let you live down me beating you in a race." I heaved as I tried to catch my breath. "Oh my god I need to get back in shape." I groaned, realizing that through it all I had let my athleticism slip ever so slightly. Suddenly summer didn't seem so far away and the idea of getting to surf with Jacob, Hike with Sam, goof off with Edward, and just enjoy the great outdoors filled me with so much joy that I almost didn't hurt anymore. Almost.