Chapter Twenty-Two
Just The Two Of Us
The next few days went by in a torturous slow pace. I did my mic checks when we arrived at the next show, went to rehearsals, and followed through with all the business of the day. Each show went off without a hitch too. News of me breaking up with Tristan after he proposed to me was a hot button topic for each radio show interview I've been doing but I handled it with a smile and said it was a mistake in terms of the view of friendships on both parties in the situation. It was what Shayna had told me to say from the PR department and I wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth. Luckily, it didn't seem to be the type of news that was going to be headlining to much as it was quickly swept away after being asked. I didn't much mind. In fact, my mind wasn't even there with me much those days. Instead, it and my heart were a couple states down, nestled in bed with Mr. Tommy Oliver where I would have liked to be. It was the fact that I would be seeing him on Friday that pushed me through every day.
Friday morning, the bus rolled into Seattle and I was nearly buzzing with joy when I saw the sign for it. It was a sunny day (well, for Seattle) and I couldn't wait to get to the venue. Tommy and I had talked last night over Skype (our now nightly ritual) and again, he insisted on not having a car pick him up and bring him to the venue. I didn't fight with him but I wished he had taken me up on the offer. Shayna was back in Nashville now and the only assistance I had on the road was the small number of roadies that were here and the stage manager. These guys were busy at work setting up things and making sure that everything was in order for the show. I couldn't expect one of them to keep tabs on Tommy for me once he arrived. But I knew he had something planned so I knew I just needed to have some faith in him.
I was in the middle of sound check when the stage manager, Lucinda, waved at me from the corner of the stage. The concert was at an indoor arena that seated up to 20,000 people. It was sold out, each seat waiting for one of my fans to arrive. Behind Lucinda, I saw Tommy standing there, a brilliant smile on his face the moment he saw me. Lucinda left him standing to the right of the stage near the entrance to the pit area right in front of the arena. He crossed his arms, leaning forward on the stage to watch me as I did sound check and went through my vocal range for the guys running the engineering for me. His hair was combed back into a ponytail and he was sporting a black t-shirt and a denim jacket over his shoulders. I waved, resisting the urge to run over and jump off the stage into his arms. I knew I needed to contain myself not only for the sake of my career but also the sake of the newness to our relationship.
"I'm all set." The sound guy called from his little tent, giving me a thumbs up. I returned it, turning the microphone off and making a beeline for Tommy who grinned up at me as I stood over him.
"Look at you." I smiled. "You're just missing a cowboy hat." He looked down at his outfit.
"Is it too much?" He asked.
"I'm only kidding." I said, sitting on the stage and swinging my legs to dangle off of it. "How was your flight?"
"Not bad. Had a delay but I made it here in time. How was your morning?"
"Busy but I'm glad you're here now." I nudged his arm with my knee and he placed his hand on it. Electricity crackled up my thigh as his skin touched mine, making the room feel ten times hotter than it actually was.
"I'm glad too. So, what's next? Do you have some free time?" I frowned.
"No. I have a radio interview with the station sponsoring the show and then I have to do prep for a meet and greet. But you can tag along if you want to."
"It's a date."
Tommy tagged along with me as I did the interview with the country radio station here in town. I managed to avoid answering the questions about Tristan and exactly who Tommy was. Some of these guys just don't know their boundaries in these interviews. After that, we had a quick lunch in the green room before heading back to the bus to get ready. Tommy came with me, the security team following along as we made our way out of the back of the arena. "Wow." Tommy said, looking at the bus as we approached.
"It's not much but its home. Well, kinda." I said, opening the door. I climbed on, Tommy following behind me while security stayed outside the bus. I had picked up the bus before I went to sound check this morning, not knowing if Tommy might make it on here or not. He looked around, amazed at the bus. I smiled, loving his reaction to everything. It reminded me a bit of Ethan and the night they came to my concert. "Make yourself at home." I said, pulling the zip up hoodie I had worn this morning off. "I'll give you the grand tour later if you'd like."
"I'd like that a lot." Tommy said as he sat down on one of the small couches on the bus. I grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge near the door and handed it to him.
"I'll be out in two minutes." I called out, walking into my room. I quickly got dressed, changing into a red and white summer dress with polka dots on it. I had a matching headband that went with it that I put into my hair, curling the ends of it. I also spotted my denim jacket in the corner of the closet and I grabbed it, pulling it on. I shoved my feet into a pair of white tennis shoes before coming out of the bedroom. Tommy stood up as I walked out.
"You look incredible." He said, looking me up and down.
"Thanks. How I dress Kimberly to go on stage is differently than my normal look these days." I said. "Don't get used to this."
"I will take any Kimberly I can get." He said, wrapping his arms around my waist. This was the first real contact we've had since he arrived and I melted right into him on contact. Leaning down, he kissed me on the lips before brushing his nose against my cheek in a warm nuzzle. "I missed you."
"I missed you, too." I whispered, pulling him in for a hug. He pulled back slightly, pressing a light kiss to my forehead. I closed my eyes, my heart racing in my chest. Lord, I wanted to drag him to my bedroom right now and have my way with him for the next 35 minutes before the curtain went up. Hell, cancel the show even at this point.
"Let's get you back inside." Tommy said, almost as if he could read my mind. I opened my eyes, feeling a slight pout on my face as I nodded in annoyed agreeance. He took my hand, leading me off the bus where security was still standing. Tonight, Frank was on detail. He was my favorite guard, a largely built bald man who once served on the police force in Chicago before an injury cut his career short. Frank smiled at me when I stepped off the bus, eyeing the fact Tommy was holding my hand. I gave him a side eye and he let out a quiet chuckle before leading us towards the venue again. Frank's been with me since the beginning along with Albert and I knew that they would probably kill for me if needed. They will also be the first ones to pick on me about everything in a cute fatherly way that I never really had growing up.
"So, Lucinda from earlier is going to set you up with a spot on one side of the stage." I told Tommy as we walked through the back of the arena. "It'll be private for you and you'll get to use the green room."
"Oh, I don't need special treatment." Tommy said. I grinned up at him.
"It's not special treatment. The show is sold out. I'm putting you in the rafters." I teased, gripping his hand. He rolled his eyes, a broad smile on his face that made his dimples shine. I gave his hand one more squeeze before letting go as we approached the backstage area. I was going to stick with my word in making sure this stayed private until he was ready to tell the boys. I wanted to scream it from the top of the world but I knew he needed this just as much as the boys deserved it. I pulled him to a stop next to the doors of the green room. Frank slipped inside, keeping the door opened a crack just in case I needed him.
"Break a leg out there." Tommy said, giving my shoulders a comforting squeeze before a friendly hug.
"Thank you. I'll see you after the set. You still planning something super-secret?"
"Perhaps." He said slyly. "You'll have to wait and see what happens."
"I object to this." I replied. "But I suppose I have no opinion in this, do I?"
"Have a great show." He said, smiling brightly without acknowledging my question. He gave me a quick peck on the cheek before heading off in the direction Lucinda was. That man was going to be the end of me yet.
The crowd was still chanting my name as I made it off the stage and through the green room. It had been a wild show, fans screaming along with every word and people having a great time. I didn't know if it was the energy of the crowd or the fact that Tommy was there that made it better than other nights but there was just something inside of me that was crackling with energy. The band was feeling it too, all of the guys chattering excitedly with each other in the green room. The new guitarist that was filling in for Tristan who had decided to take a month off to "spiritually heal" as he told the label was fitting right in with everyone as they filled plates with food. I looked around the room, looking for any sign of Tommy. I didn't see him but I did see Frank who was standing by the door of the green room that led towards the exiting area. I was surprised to see that Frank was holding just a singular white rose in his hand.
"Nice flower." I said, walking over to him.
"It's for you." He said, handing it to me.
"Aw! Frank, you shouldn't have!"
"I didn't." He chuckled. "Your new friend did."
"Where is my new friend?" I questioned.
"I was sworn to secrecy. He did, however, say that he would meet you back by the busses. But you didn't hear that from me." He pushed open the door for me and I slipped by. Frank and I walked up the tunnel towards the exit. Frank stopped though right before the door.
"What are you doing?" I asked, raising an eyebrow at him.
"I have strict orders to make sure that you leave the concert area and return to your bus safely every night from the label." He pushed the door open and reveal a white pickup truck sitting out there, Tommy leaning against it. "However, if I don't see you leave the arena, it technically means that I didn't breach any kind of contract per say."
"Thanks, Frank." I said, smiling at Tommy. Frank turned his back towards me.
"I can't hear you." He said in a loud sing song voice. Laughing, I quickly skipped out the door and towards Tommy.
"There you are." He said, smiling at me. "It was a great show."
"Thanks. What is all this?" I asked, gesturing towards the truck.
"Well, every girl needs to get whisked away on a white horse now and then. This is the closest thing I could find to a white Bronco though."
"Ah. I appreciate that. What is the plan here though?" Tommy reached up and opened the passenger side door.
"Guess you'll have to jump in and find out."
I was able to quickly change into a pair of jeans and a t-shirt before Tommy drove us away from the venue. He travelled through the traffic with ease, avoiding all the cars coming from the show and heading right to the highway. He turned the radio on, adjusting the dial until it was playing music. It was the ending of a country song by Brooks and Dunn. Tommy turned it up a little before passing a car.
"I hope everyone got to enjoy the Kimberly Hart concert tonight. From what I heard, it was a killer performance. She might not have much luck when it comes to her love life but she sure knows how to put on a show." The radio DJ said. I scoffed, shaking my head at the jab he was making about the whole Tristan proposal. This was exactly why I keep to myself out of the attention of the media. It went into one of my songs and I reached over, switching it off.
"You don't ever listen to yourself on the radio?" Tommy asked. I shook my head, making a disgusted face.
"God, no. I know I must sound good since I have a record deal and everything but I still can't stand listening to myself unless I have to. When we record new music, I hate having to listen to the play back over and over again. Makes me wonder how I am able to have this career when I sound so nasally."
"You do not sound nasally." He said, raising an eyebrow at me.
"You're biased." I replied, giving him a wink. I noticed that he was pulling off the highway now, taking the exit. I saw a sign for a ferry as he pulled into a big parking lot. "Where are you going exactly?"
"This way." He replied, shrugging his shoulders. I saw that the parking lot was connected to a large opening that faced out towards a harbor. There was indeed a ferry loading area but the ferry was not running due to the late night hour. Tommy parked the truck in a spot and turned the engine off. Without a word, he climbed out and walked around the front of the truck to my door. He opened it, signaling me to climb out. I did, gazing around the nearly empty parking lot. There was one lone car in it to the far right side where it said employee parking. Reaching out, Tommy took my hand and started heading towards the area where the ferry was docked.
"I don't believe it's running today." I said, looking at the large ship.
"No, it's closed for the night. However, I was able to sweet talk my way into something a little different." He nodded his head to the left said and when I looked, I saw there was a man standing next to a smaller dock, a boat behind him. Looking closer, I saw that it was actually Adam Park. He waved when he noticed I was looking at him, his hair longer now and pulled back into a ponytail behind his head. He was dressed in a dark blue hoodie and some jeans, looking like the same ol' Adam I knew in high school. It had been forever since I had seen him, a chance encounter the last time I was on the west coast for a show.
"Howdy." He grinned, holding his arms open to me as we approached. I let go of Tommy's hand and gave Adam a bone crushing hug.
"What are you doing here?" I asked, looking up at him as he released me.
"I live here in Seattle right now while I'm working on my stuff. Tommy gave me a heads up that you were in town and needed some help setting all this up." I raised an eyebrow at Tommy.
"And exactly what is this?"
"Patience." Tommy grinned. He turned, jogging back towards the truck. Adam held out his hand to me and helped me climb aboard the small boat. It was a good sized vessel, something one might take out on the lake for a day or to just cruise around in under the sun. The water sloshed against the sides as I walked towards the front, leaving Adam room to do what he needed. He disappeared down below somewhere, telling me it was bigger than I thought. The sound of Tommy's footsteps made me look up and I saw that he was carrying a blanket over one arm and a picnic basket in the other. He climbed aboard, the boat rocking slightly as it shifted under his weight.
"What is all that?" I asked as he set the basket down on the floor by our feet.
"Well…it's not exactly Angel Grove Park but I figured a picnic worked so well for our first date before, I should try it again. But with a few more surprised thrown in."
"Oh, Tommy. You didn't have to go to all this trouble." I said, not being able to stop the smile from lighting up my face.
"Anything for you, Beautiful." He said, leaning in and giving me a quick kiss on the cheek. Carefully, he tucked the blanket under the handles of the basket before grabbing my hand. We walked towards the area where Adam had disappeared and I saw there was a set of three steps that lead down into a bunk area. "Adam, I think we're ready." Tommy called down. Adam appeared, something black in his hands. He climbed up the stairs.
"Sure thing." He grinned, turning to me. "Here. It might get a bit windy and chilly while we're driving. Thought you might want this." He held out a black sweat shirt to me. I took it, sliding it up over the t-shirt I was wearing. Adam walked over to the steering wheel and turned something, the engine turning on under our feet. Tommy moved around, helping to remove the tethers holding us to the dock. With a slight kick, Adam and Tommy were able to push us away from the cement wall and soon, we were slowly moving through the marina. I perched myself on a small bench behind the captain's chair and Tommy slid in next to me, wrapping his arm around me in a loose way.
Once we were past the other ships in the marina and the wake signs, Adam picked up speed and headed out towards the darkness of the open ocean. Looking behind us, I could see the glow from the lights of Seattle. The tall buildings went up and down the coast and I could make out the lights from the highway where we had just come. The Space Needle was the object that stuck out the most, the top illuminated with lights that faded in and out with a different color every few seconds. Adam picked up speed again, the wind making my hair blow around my face. Adam had been right about the wind, the air cold on my face. I pulled the hoodie tighter and Tommy held me closer to him in response. He smiled down at me, the dim lighting of the boat illuminating our faces just enough for me to make out his dimples as he did. My heart fluttered and I thanked whatever divine being made it possible for us to be here together again.
About half an hour later, Adam slowed to a stop and killed the engine. Tommy stood up and walked with Adam towards the back of the boat. Together, they lowered the anchor and secured things around the railings. Tommy went to the front again while Adam pressed some buttons on the control panel. I was surprised to see that there a number of other boats out here with us, the closest one about 70 yards away. I could make out the string of lights they had on their boat as they floated with the gentle current. The shore line glow was just visible in the distance, reminding me that we were still close enough to civilization. Above us, I saw more stars than I had seen in a long time. The calmness mixing with the ocean air made me sigh.
"Amazing, right?" Adam asked, regaining my attention. Walking over, he put his hands on the railing and leaned forward. "It's a sight I never get tired of seeing."
"I've really miss you, Adam." I said. "I'm sorry I haven't reached out at all. I've come to realize lately that I haven't been the best friend lately."
"It's not your fault." He replied. "I really didn't want to reach out to anyone. I sorta hid myself away up here."
"Why?"
"Takes a lot out of someone to realize that they aren't really the person they thought they were. Especially when it's a person your own family wants nothing to do with."
"It's really shitty that your parents couldn't handle that you're gay, Adam. But that's their loss, not your fault." I spoke. Adam gave a small smile, nodding his head.
"Yeah. It took me a long time to actually figure that one out. And that doesn't make not having them in my life any easier. Especially when you come from a culture where it's frowned on for going outside of the norm for the slightest reason." Adam confided in us all that he was gay about a year or two after I left California for the first time. It didn't come to a shock to me as I had always had a slight suspicion that Adam was attracted to men. When he did tell everyone, his parents and his older siblings did not take it as well as he had hoped. His parents essentially disowned him and forbid any of the younger members of his family from speaking with him. Thankfully, his younger sisters never listened and still support him. But I knew it was hard for him to deal with that loss. I had heard he was up here over the years and that he was trying out his hand at a music career. But I hadn't heard much beyond that and my careless selfish side never bothered to check in on him to see how he was doing.
"So, what have you been doing up here?"
"Well…I tried the whole music thing. Had a band that did fairly well for a while but nothing too major. But I discovered that I didn't really like that scene as much as I thought I would. I hated going to gig after gig with nothing to show for it and I just didn't feel like it was something I wanted to do with my life. I did some soul searching and I discovered that there was something I really liked better. So, I bought myself this little boat and here we are." I looked at his confused.
"What exactly do you do with the boat?" I asked.
"Are you familiar with Puget Sound and what it's known for at all?" He asked. I shook my head.
"No. What is that?" He grinned, standing up straight.
"You'll find out soon enough." I went to ask him another question but just then, Tommy appeared next to us. "All set?" Adam asked. Tommy nodded. "Alright. I will be down below if you need me. Behave yourself, you crazy kids. I don't want to have to deal with the coast guard."
"Thanks, man." Tommy said. Adam clapped him on the back before disappearing down below again. I stood up, looking at Tommy who was nervously wiping his hands on his jeans.
"You okay?" I asked. He nodded, taking my hand in his.
"Yeah. Come here. I have something for you." He led me to the front of the boat again and this time, I saw he had laid out the blanket with some throw pillows and set up the contents of the basket to the side on a small table that was secured onto the boat. There were yellow lights strung around as well, providing light for the darkness around us. It was cute and sweet, making my eyes well up a little. I blinked them back, not wanting Tommy to see the sap I was becoming. "I hope its okay."
"It's perfect." I said softly, squeezing his hand. Around us, I heard a distant noise. It was like someone letting out a little cry. It happened again, it echoing off the surface of the water. "What is that?" I asked.
"Your surprise is about to start." Tommy said in a hushed tone as he led me to the very front of the boat along the railing. The noise grew louder now and it sounded like it was being multiplied. I heard splashing in the distance but couldn't see the source in the darkness. Tommy reached over and hit something on a pole behind him. A beam of light shot out of it, lighting up the surface of the water in front of us. The splashing grew closer and suddenly, I saw a large mass move under the waves. There was a flash of white followed by the cry again.
"Orcas!" I gasped, leaning forward to see better. There was more splashing as I saw more killer whales swim closer to us. They moved through the water between us and the other boat, their fins cutting through the surface of the water like a hot knife in butter. Their melodic singing echoed out into the night time air, clicks and screeching coming when they broke the surface. Now and then, their blow holes would spit out bursts of air above them, creating a mist that drifted towards us. The whales slowed, swimming and drifting in the water around us. Now and then, one would bob out of the water like a buoy and the white around their eyes made it look like they were looking at us with the same curious interest that I was staring at them with.
Orcas had always been one of them animals I wanted to see with my own two eyes in the wild since I was a little girl. My father had taken me to the theme parks to see them when I was a kid before him and Mom divorced but it always felt forced to me, seeing them in those tanks. Dad always made promises to go whale watching but that never happened. Now, standing here and seeing them in the wild, I found it hard to catch my breath. They were beautiful and swam with such amazing grace through the water, almost like a majestic bird would through the air.
"Tommy, this is incredible." I whispered. A smaller orca swam closer to the boat, stopping about four feet from me. It floated at the top of the water, staring up at me. I knelt down, sticking my head through the area of the railings to that my shoulders rests on the bars. As we stared at each other, it made me feel like there was an internal dialogue going between us that I couldn't describe. The whale clicked its tongue, a beautiful noise coming from it as it did. It rolled slightly to one side, the white of its belly being the only thing I could see under the water. It had four black dots under its chin in the shape of a four leaf clover almost.
"This is what Adam does for work. He's working for a non-profit that is tracking the killer whale pods in Washington and Oregon. He's stationed here to track this pod. This is Clover. She's part of the J-Pod here." Tommy said, kneeling down next to me. "She's the baby."
"She's beautiful." I said. "Tommy, this is a dream come true for me."
"I know. I remembered from when we were kids." He replied. I raised my head, looking at him.
"What?"
"You told me that shortly after I joined the team you wanted to see killer whales in the wild."
"Ugh, I don't want to do this stupid biology paper." Zack groaned, leaning his head on the cafeteria table in front of him.
"Dude, it's one paper. It's not that big of a deal." Jason said, taking a sip of his protein shake.
"I had plans tonight though! I'd rather be with Angela than written about some stupid squid or whatever lives in the ocean." Zack's muffled voice said from where his head laid.
"Squids are invertebrates. We're conducting research about mammals that reside in the ocean." Billy stated, not looking up from the text book he was taking notes out of.
"Well," Zack lifted his head. "Either way, I don't wanna do it."
"It's not that hard. Just pick a mammal that lives in the ocean and write a couple pages on it. Easy, peasy." Trini said, winking over at me as I rolled my eyes. "Do you know what you're doing your paper on yet, Kim?"
"Orcas." I replied, unwrapping my tuna sandwich.
"You mean like killer whales?" Tommy asked me from my right. I nodded, a slight blush in my cheeks as his attention was on me.
"Yeah. I've always wanted to see one up close. I think they'd be a good topic."
"Have you been to SeaWorld?" He asked. I nodded.
"When I was a kid but I don't think it's the same as the ocean." I sighed. "Maybe someday I'll get there."
"You remembered that? After all this time?" I whispered.
"I remember every little thing." He breathed. Leaning over, I pressed my lips against his. I let go of the bars I was leaning against and shifted, wrapping them around his shoulders. Tommy slid back so he was sitting on his behind, pulling me into his lap. This sweet, kind, thoughtful, incredible man was back in my life. Back in a life of a person that didn't deserve it. I felt my heart swell as Tommy's arms wrapped around my torso, pulling me closer.
The whales hung around for about an hour while Tommy and I enjoyed the food he had packed. It was mostly fruit, cheese, and assorted cold cuts that he had gotten from the catering company that supplied the food for the tour. Security and Shayna had helped him get that set up without me knowing. It was fun hanging out with Tommy under the glow of the lights with the sound of the whales around us. I could have stayed there forever, laying on his chest as we gazed up at the nighttime sky full of stars.
However, life calls.
We packed up our picnic a little after 2 am and Tommy helped Adam pull the anchor back in. Tommy and I sat wrapped in our blanket as Adam headed back towards Seattle. I leaned info Tommy's chest, not wanting to leave from our little cocoon but I knew that Adam probably didn't want to spend the entire night out on the water. He pulled into the dock a short time later and Tommy and he tied her up before we climbed off. I gave Adam a huge hug, promising to call and catch up with him next time I was in the area. I also gave him my Skype information and he promised to send me some clips of the work he has been doing with the whales. I gave him back his hoodie before Tommy and I climbed back into the truck and drove away.
I must have fallen asleep in the truck on the way back to the hotel where the tour bus was parked because the next thing I knew, Tommy was opening my door. "Hey." He whispered, unbuckling my seatbelt. "I didn't mean to wake you."
"It's okay." I yawned, rubbing my eyes. He helped me climb out, shutting the door behind me. The sound echoed in the parking garage around us. As usual, the tour bus was parked in a private location in the garage, giving it enough room and enough privacy so I didn't have to worry about any crazy people surprising me in the middle of the night. Security was posted a few parking spots away like normal. Tommy slipped his hand in mine and we walked slowly over to the tour bus. Shayna had been nice enough to get the driver a hotel room for the night, something I had asked her to do last night. I wasn't too sure why as usually the driver just hangs out in his little bunk up front. But as Tommy came to a slow stop next to the door, I felt that familiar flutter in my stomach as he looked down at me.
"I hope you had fun tonight. I know I did." He said softly, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.
"It was almost perfect." I said.
"Almost? What would have made it perfect then?" He asked. I smirked.
"This." Gently, I tugged at the front of his shirt and pulled him closer to me until my lips brushed against his. Tommy cupped my face in his hands, meeting my lips. I stood on my tippy toes, deepening the kiss. I could feel the heat between us, my skin tingling like I had touched a live wire. I pulled away slightly, looking up at Tommy as I caught my breath. "Do you want to come in?" I panted. He nodded and without hesitation, he bent down and picked me up. My hips straddled his as I fumbled to open up the bus door behind him. It opened and Tommy walked up them, his lips finding mine again. I sank my fingers into his hairs, exploring his mouth as he made the journey to the back of the bus. I thought about the last time I had been with Tommy, the infamous night where he had cheated on Kat and then caused me to go running for the hills. Even though it had been so long ago, I could still imagine his hands all over me in a way that I often thought about when I was in need of…self-inspiration.
Tommy bumped around a bit as he entered the narrow hall that went to my bedroom but he managed to get through without injury to either one of us. I had left one of the dim lights on like usual when I was here earlier, making enough illumination so that he didn't trip over anything. Tommy walked over to the bed and sat down, my knees sinking into the mattress. Though it was my room on my tour bus, it was still a bit of cramped quarters. I was willing to make it work. I needed to make it work. This was going to be our first time since getting back together and I was going to make sure it was perfect and mind-blowing in every way I possibly could.
Tommy's hands left my back from where he had been supporting me, allowing me to slide off his lap. As I did, I never broke eye contact as I pulled off my t-shirt and my jeans, leaving me in just my matching light pink bra and panties. I walked over to him again, straddling like I had been before. My heart raced as I pressed my lips to his, reaching for his shirt. I pulled it off with his assistance, Tommy built torso looking more defined in the lighting. Raising my arms, I pulled the hair tie from my hair and allowed my hair to cascade down from its place. I also reached behind me and unclasped my bra, discarding it to the floor behind me where the rest of my clothes were. I returned to kissing him, rest my hands on his chest as I did. He ran his hands down my sides, resting them on my thighs. I felt them shiver under his touch.
"Kim." He whispered into my lips.
"Hmm?" I replied, gliding my hands down his chest and towards his belt line. He moved his hands, grabbing mine as he pulled away to look up at me.
"Hey. Are you okay?" He asked. "You're trembling." I noticed then that my fingers and my thighs were both trembling and I didn't realize it before.
"Yeah. I'm okay." I said, nodding. He stared at me and then moved a hand to my cheek.
"I think we should wait." He said, softly.
"What?" I asked, confused. The thought that he didn't want me suddenly crashed down on me. "You don't want to be with me?" I said, turning my head away from him so that my hair covered it.
"Look at me." He said, gently lifting my chin so I was meeting his eyes. "I didn't say that. I just don't want to rush into anything that neither one of us is ready for yet. We're rebuilding something and I don't want to start things off by forcing this."
"I'm sorry." I whispered, feeling tears in my eyes. "I just wanted to make tonight perfect. I feel like I have so much to make up for and work towards after what happened. I should have prepared more or looked better."
"Kimberly, you are beautiful and I want nothing more than to make love with you. But not until we're both ready. You have nothing to prove to me or to make up for." He pressed a sweet kiss to my forehead. "It's okay to not be ready yet. I don't think I am either. That doesn't change the fact that I am so grateful to be here with you and that I love you."
"I love you, too." I said, resting my hands on his shoulders.
"You'll always be my girl."