Author's note: Welcome back for the next part. This was probably my favorite chapter to write. Part of the chapter title makes sense and the other half will make sense in chapter 3. I listened to angels like you- Miley cyrus while i wrote this chapter. Comment and kudos if you enjoyed this. Enjoy your emotional rollercoaster ride!
Chapter. 2 Catching up
~During~
It took Naruto 3 days after Sasuke stayed overnight at his place for the first time, for him to pluck up the courage and see if Sasuke was still suppressing his chakra. He wasn't. Naruto decided that meant Sasuke wanted him to find him. He allowed the flow of his own chakra to lead him to Sasuke, all the while trying not to get his hopes up. Sasuke would probably turn his idea down flat.
When he found him Sasuke was sitting at a stone bench with a scroll open over his lap, and a water bottle next to him.
"Here we go again." Sasuke muttered without looking up from his scroll.
"I do live here you know." Naruto said sidling up next to him on the bench.
Naruto had decided to run there, and he was perspiring quite a bit. He used the sleeve of his sweatshirt to wipe his brow, and a droplet flew over onto Sasuke's scroll.
"Ugh, can you at least pretend to have manners?" Sasuke gave him a bland look, and it made Naruto laugh.
Naruto wondered how much Sasuke would bend to him by this point
"Neither of us is exactly housebroken." Naruto pointed out thinking of the way Sasuke had changed since childhood. When they were kids Sasuke was so damn prim and proper it was borderline OCD. His weapons were always arranged just so, and the hand full of times Naruto had been allowed over to his place his house hadn't had so much as a speck of dirt in it. Now Sasuke wasn't exactly a slob, but he was more careless. Naruto noticed the way he sometimes didn't bother buttoning his shirts up all of the way, or his notes would be scattered all around his desk in no particular order, or how when they got done fucking he wouldn't even wipe himself off before pulling his pants back on. Sasuke was messier now, the years had mellowed him out. "I was just thinking about something i wanted to talk to you about."
Sasuke groaned. "Fine. Let's get it over with." It spoke volumes to how much Naruto had worn him down, that Sasuke didn't even at least try to get out of the conversation.
Naruto swallowed the rush of nerves in his throat, and felt them instead swelling in his stomach. "I thought maybe we could keep doing- you know- even though we're done with the program and we won't be going to the bar on Fridays and what not." Naruto swooped his hand around the air hoping his statement was as casual as he wanted it to be. Something unspoken hung in the air between them. It had dawned on Sasuke by this point that it in fact it had not been the alcohol that kept them screwing. Because the morning after he stayed at Naruto's for the first time, they woke up and fucked. Entirely sober.
"So Dead-last is trying to date me now?" Sasuke asked less than amused.
"No. No." Naruto rushed out to recover the conversation. "Nothing of the sort. I don't know about you but- I just- for me the sex is like really good- and i thought why should we stop a good thing?"
"Naruto." Sasuke said in a scathing voice as he began to roll his scroll back up. "I can't stand you. You don't even like me. It couldn't work."
"So?" Naruto shrugged. "What have we got to lose? You were already set on never speaking to me again. It's not like we'd be ruining a beautiful life long friendship or anything?" Naruto couldn't help but let the scowl set onto his face. He was still only a little bitter that Sasuke had never allowed him the friendship he'd so wanted from him as a child.
Sasuke's face became thoughtful as he turned Naruto's idea over in his dead. "We'd just be screwing, right?"
"Yes." Naruto answered like a dog with a bone. He couldn't let on, he couldn't seem to eager or he'd have Sasuke running back to Orochimaru. "Just screwing."
"Well fine. As long as you know it won't change anything. I still can't stand you."
Naruto laughed. "Yeah, well i'll never like you." A slow smirk found it's way to him as the relief of not actually being rejected hit him. "Wanna come back to mine, and we can celebrate our new little arrangement?"
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~After~
Naruto stared for so long his eyes began to hurt. He just couldn't stop staring. Sasuke's red tooth brush on the counter beside the sink. He'd been in a rush before... when they'd had to leave. He hadn't had the time to put his brush back in the holder. Naruto thought if he reached out to touch it, it might probably still be partly damp.
All around Naruto all he saw were reminders of him. The packs of cigarettes strewn around, his shoes by the door, his clothes hung in their closet, his damn toothbrush, and the fucking kunai still on the kitchen table. It was all suffocating him.
He walked away from the toothbrush thinking he could find somewhere else, anywhere else to be in the apartment they'd shared together for 3 years. Then he came to find Sasuke's to do list he always kept on the fridge with a handful of magnets. It listed meetings, and lunches he had scheduled for work. Then there was also a final note scrawled at the bottom. 'Pick up the cake for N on Tuesday.'
Naruto hated October. He'd hated it his entire life. He just recently added one more reason to despise this month more than all the others. October was the month the love of his life died.
They'd been called in for the mission on Monday, and so Sasuke never picked up the cake he ordered for Naruto's birthday. Naruto wondered if they'd already tossed it out, as he sank to the kitchen floor.
Once he leveled himself to the floor he waited for the tears to come again, but he spotted something under the fridge. He slid his arm against the cold tiled floor, and pulled the object out. His chest seized. Another carton of cigarettes.
He had to get out. He had to leave or he might- he had to get away from their apartment just so he could breathe again.
Naruto rushed out so quickly he didn't even have time to leave the key under their stone frog. He ran like a mad man all the way to Kakashi's office. Shikamaru didn't even try to stop him when he barged in passed him, he just gave him a pitying dreadful look. The same one Naruto remembered everyone giving Hinata after the war, when Shino died. Naruto threw the Hokage's door wide open, and didn't care that there were other people there in the room with him. He didn't care that they all saw what a miserable mess Naruto was as he marched across the room to stand in front of his sensei with both fists clenched.
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~During~
"Fuck off, Pakun." Naruto grumbled at his sensei's summoning dog. Naruto had the misfortune of waking up to him bright and early. Not that Naruto expected Sasuke to make a habit out of staying overnight after they finished with each other, just he would have rather woken up to him than Pakun. "I already told the old man, i'm not going on missions. He needs to deactivate me again. Or better yet take me off the roster all together!" Annoyed and at peace with the fact he wouldn't be able to go back to sleep, Naruto pulled the blanket from over his head to glare at the dog. However he found he couldn't muster it.
He was to busy being shocked by his surroundings.
Naruto never heard an answer after they agreed to keep sleeping together, Sasuke just grabbed him and his world spun. Then he fell into bed with Sasuke on top of him. They had messed around all night. Naruto went down on Sasuke, and Sasuke went down on him before they got to the grand finale. In all of it Naruto had been to distracted to realize.
Sasuke hadn't taken them back to Naruto's place, he had taken them back to Sasuke's. Naruto hadn't seen the place in years but he'd know it anywhere. The king sized bed, with black sheets. The bedside table with the piece of cardboard stuck under it so it was level. The only thing that was different from when they were kids is the stack of empty cigarette cartons on the dresser.
"Holy shit." Naruto said as he tried to comprehend where he was.
"Yeah, i'll say kid." Pakun grunted, looking around Naruto and at Sasuke's room. "I didn't realize you and the Uchiha had gotten so-" Naruto bit down on his lip, he dreaded the end of that sentence more than he would a senbon to the face. "close."
Naruto briefly thought about crawling back under the covers but Pakun wasn't going anywhere, and Naruto had to get the hell out of there before Sasuke got back. He had left before Naruto woke up for a reason, and Naruto wasn't going to push the envelope when he had only just convinced Sasuke to keep sleeping together. Naruto started to get up but stopped when he realized he was still incredibly nude. Sasuke's sheets were pooled around his waist, and Pakun was giving him an amused look.
'Perfect.' Naruto thought as he got out of bed, and Pakun got an eye-full of his bare ass. 'Now Kakashi would know Naruto didn't want to spend his time being a jonin, but he was happy to spend his time fucking one.'
When Naruto found his clothes, and finished dressing Pakun jerked his head in the lets go already fashion Kakashi was famous for.
As he followed Pakun through the village Naruto replayed the events from last night trying to find something, anything out of the ordinary.
They blew each other which was something they hadn't done before. But he didn't think that was to unusual, they had been sleeping together for months by this point. Then the more Naruto turned it over in his head there was something that stuck out of the ordinary.
Right when Sasuke had entered him, he had asked. "You okay?" It had been so quick and quiet, Naruto hadn't been sure he had even heard it until Sasuke asked again. "Am i hurting you?"
Naruto smiled. He really was wearing Sasuke down. In the course of one evening he'd both been allowed in Sasuke's home, and Sasuke had shown concern for his well being. It meant something.
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~After~
"The answer is no. That's the end of it." Kakashi declared from the seat he still hadn't risen from. Naruto expected if they'd had a private audience he would have by now. He would have tried to pat Naruto's arm or even worse hug him. "I'm not assigning you another mission."
"Kakashi. I'm fine." Naruto shrugged willing it to be true. "Really."
"You are not fine." He accused. "Sasuke just died, Naruto."
"You think I don't know that?" Naruto's voice shook with the effort it took him not to explode. "I have to live in one giant reminder of that, his fucking clothes, and cigarettes every-" Naruto paused. "Please. I just need something, anything to do. I'll even take a D rank." He begged.
One of the people attending the meeting Naruto was interrupting cupped a hand over her mouth, her face full of pity. Naruto's eyes stung as tears threatened to fall.
"No. You aren't ready." Kakashi stared down at the table hard, no longer able to bare the sight of Naruto with his blood shot eyes, dirty hoodie, and his unkempt hair. "Go to Sakura, she can help you get some sleep, you look like you need it."
But that wasn't what he needed Naruto wanted to scream at his teacher, because what he needed was Sasuke.
"Nevermind. Forget it." Naruto said lastly as he left the room.
He wandered out feeling glad that he hadn't cried in front of those people, and he ended up back at the training grounds somehow. The ones they used as genin. Naruto finds the one. The one they used their very first team practice for, and the one they had used when they reignited team 7 all that time later. He let himself slide down the wooden post, he was tied to once. It had been his punishment for not following Kakashi's rules. Was this his punishment now Naruto wondered? Was Sasuke's death atonement for all he had done wrong?
After a few hours against the post, Naruto realized kakashi was right not to have given him a mission.
He was absolutely useless right now. A danger to himself, and others probably. He watched as the clouds in the sky shifted, and all he could think of was Sasuke and his stupid beautiful face.
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~During~
It wasn't until he walked into Kakashi's office with Pakun at his heels that Naruto realized what a poor job he had done of cleaning himself up. He could feel Sasuke's spend dripping out of him and soaking the fabric between his cheeks. It was sticky and uncomfortable and he prayed whatever Kakashi wanted would be quick.
He nearly tripped over a chair when he saw who was already in the room with Kakashi. This might actually take awhile, Naruto thought looking at Sasuke leaned up against the wall next to Kakashi.
"Naruto!" Kakashi called and walked over to greet him with a clap on the back. "Welcome, welcome."
"Uh what's going on exactly?" Naruto asked Kakashi his eyes trailing across the room to Sasuke who had yet to acknowledge Naruto's presence in any way.
"Oh i had an idea i thought i'd run by you guys," Kakashi waved Naruto over to the 3 chairs set up in front of his desk. Naruto froze on the spot. Kakashi was never this fucking nice, not unless he wanted something. "We're still waiting for one more but go ahead and make yourself comfortable, i'm going to finish up some paperwork while we wait."
Pakun went to curl up under Kakashi's desk.
Naruto tried to ask who it was they were waiting for but closed his mouth when he realized he already knew. Fuck.
Kakashi went back to sit at his desk, and Naruto meandered still dazedly over near to where Sasuke was, both of them avoiding the chairs completely. Sasuke's eyes darted around the room suspiciously, and he seemed entirely as at a loss for the situation as Naruto was.
Several minutes passed in utter silence and Naruto became so bored he counted the number of tiles in the ceiling. 226.
Then the sound of heeled shoes on the floor could be heard from all the way down the hallway. Naruto slid down the wall just a bit, and let his head fall into his hands. He could feel a sweat breaking out on the hair on his lip. Please be wrong he thought, please be anyone else. All of a sudden Naruto didn't even care that there was come dripping out of his ass. He couldn't think beyond the heeled shoes that were making their way in his direction.
"What's wrong with you?" Sasuke muttered.
Naruto looked around the room spying the windows behind Kakashi, but like he'd just read his mind Kakashi went over to close the blinds.
"Sounds like she's here." Kakashi announced.
Naruto felt like he might throw up. The door swung open gently with a knock, and Naruto had to force himself to stand back up straight.
"Sensei I didn't know if you'd had time to take lunch yet today," Sakura bounced into the room all pink curls, and dreamy smiles. She had a take away box between her hands. "so i thought i would bring you a little-" She stopped dead to openly stare at Naruto, her happy smile dropped into a frown. "treat." She finished.
The take away hit the floor, splattering, and she was across the room crushing Naruto against her into a hug before he could come up with anything to say.
"Naruto." She held tighter to him, and his joints began to unthaw at the warmth of her touch. Then he smelled her hair and it was so familiar and inviting he started to pull her closer. She wrapped her arms around his neck and her feet were dangling off the ground, but Naruto just held on tighter. How did he forget? How had he gone so long without seeing her? Or talking to her? "Naruto." It sounded like a sob. "I missed you, i missed you so much." And he realized how much he really had missed her to with a pang of guilt. Naruto's hand had wrapped into the hair at her back, long tresses, she'd let it grow out.
He pulled back to look her in the eyes. "I missed you to Sak." Nothing existed for a moment as he admitted that to her. "I missed you to."
Then their little bubble popped when Sasuke cleared his throat near them. "Sakura." Sasuke greeted her formally, than gave Naruto a quizzical like he was trying to solve some great puzzle.
"Oh Sasuke I didn't see you, wow you got tall huh?" She said and her voice was stuffy, and tears stained her cheeks. Naruto wiped them with his thumbs, and sat her back on her feet. He gave her a half smile, and she went to give Sasuke an awkward side hug.
"Well my precious students, i have to say it's nice to have you all here at once. It's been years hasn't it?" Kakashi waved them forward and he hugged Sakura next.
"Sorry about the take away Sensei i-"
"Not a problem i'll have someone clean that up later, let's get down to business shall we?" He motioned for them to take seats. The three of them did, and Sakura frowned a tiny bit when Naruto sat not at the middle chair, but on the other side.
It was good to see her. He just hadn't forgotten what happened. Nor had he forgiven her.
Sasuke didn't seem apprehensive about their gathering, but Naruto sure was.
"When you say business-" Naruto narrowed his eyes at Kakashi, and he crossed his arms behind his head to support it. "I hope you don't mean what i think you mean."
Kakashi chuckled nervously. "Well Naruto, the thing is-"
"Kakashi." Naruto ground out. "Non active. That's what i asked for the last time we talked."
"You did?" Sakura asked surprised.
"Naruto please let me just explain."
"I'm not going on missions again, I didn't make Jonin to go on missions again okay?"
"Well then why did you take it?" Sakura asked genuinely wondering.
Sasuke snorted. Then Naruto remembered how uncomfortable it was to sit with an ass of come, and he wriggled in his seat.
"Something to do, i guess." Naruto answered.
"I personally think it would be an absolute waste not to at least consider taking missions again, Naruto especially-" Kakashi let the last word hang in the air. "when i've just had the most brilliant idea.
"What exactly do Sasuke and Sakura have to do with this brilliant idea of yours?" Naruto asked suddenly realizing they didn't have to be there for Kakashi to plead for him to come back to work. He had done that enough when neither of them were anywhere around. Kakashi didn't need them there for that...or did he?
"As your teams sensei i can't help but feel a sense of-" Kakshi rubbed his chin searching for a word. "regret. With how things turned out."
Naruto swore he saw Sasuke scoot down in his chair just a tiny fraction. His face remained stone.
"You 3 never got the proper experiences together, and i hate to see people robbed so-"
"You mean it Sensei?" Sakura jumped up from her seat. "Oh. Yes. I vote yes!" She squealed.
"Yes to what?" Naruto dreaded the answer but this was just getting dragged out, and he really wanted to hit the showers soon.
"I want to reestablish team 7." Kakashi answered. "If it's something the 3 of you decide you want, I won't force it on you."
"Hell no." Naruto said on instinct, and Sakura deflated immediately turning to him with a broken puppy dog pout. "No fucking way. No missions. I'm out."
"Don't you wish you'd gotten what all the other teams had?" Kakashi tried to reason. "This is a chance to make it right." He seemed deep in thought. "For all of you to make it right." His eyes landed on Sasuke in the middle seat.
Sasuke remained quiet. Probably wishing he were elsewhere.
"Naruto-" Sakura said and he was afraid she might start crying again. "it's what we always wanted back then. You me and Sasuke out on missions. A rank missions i-"
"Things have changed. I don't want the same things i did when i was 12." Now he remembered why he'd had to keep Sakura at arms length the last 2 years. Among other reasons. She never stopped hoping that Sasuke would make his way back to Konoha, and that they'd go back to what they were with the snap of a finger. Kakashi had just given her the wettest dream she ever had. "I'm sorry Sakura i just can't."
Looking at Sakura always brought up what was probably his worst memory during the war.
"Maybe it's been to long. You guys are all grown up maybe it wouldn't work anymore. You're different people than the little genin i raised that's for sure." Kakashi commented with wistful disappointment.
"Coward." Was the word Sasuke finally decided to share.
"Excuse me?" Naruto said his hackles risen immediately.
"I called you-" Sasuke turned in his seat to look him square in the face. "a coward."
Naruto grabbed a fistful of Sasuke's shirt purely from muscle memory.
"We wouldn't even be talking about putting the team back together if it weren't for you breaking it to begin with."
"Hey guys." Sakura interjected as the mediator like she always used to.
"There they are." Kakashi said clapping slowly. "There's team 7. I take back what i said. This can work."
Then it clicked and Naruto released Sasuke when he realized what he was doing. He was purposely trying to get a rise out of him. Trying to get him angry. Sasuke wanted him to agree to this? Naruto supposed in Sasuke's head it would be easier to work with team 7 rather than anyone else. 'The devil you know.' and all that.
"Nice try." He said over his shoulder as he decided just to leave. "You almost had me there Sasuke."
His foot was through the doorway when Sasuke spoke again. "That's to bad then." Sasuke said in a banal tone. "Guess Sakura and i will be on our own out there won't we?" He shrugged like he didn't care either way.
"On your own?" Naruto waited at the door.
"Well yeah i guess it'll just be the 2 of us of out there on missions, right Sakura?" Sasuke said roping her in.
"...Yeah?" Naruto didn't believe for a second she knew what she was agreeing to.
"Yeah and if we were to get into any trouble, and you know the dangerous kind of trouble at that, well then it'll just be to bad you won't be there to lend us a hand." That fucker Naruto thought acidly. He hadn't thought far enough ahead yet. If Naruto said no to team 7, then Sasuke and Sakura would just be put elsewhere with other teams they didn't know and- damn him for pointing it out.
"You're both grown adults, and highly skilled ninja." Naruto said as his hand trembled over the door knob. "My being there won't make a difference if you get into a bind."
"But." Sasuke said in a philosophical manner. "what if it did?"
Then when Naruto turned back around he found that Pakun had hopped up onto Kakashi's desk. Sasuke and Sakura were looking to Naruto for an answer, but Naruto couldn't look away from Kakashi. It was like a train wreck, he couldn't look away. It was awful, and horrible, and- Kakashi leaned his head down, and Naruto saw as Pakun whispered into his ear. And OH GOD NO. Because Naruto just knew he was telling Kakashi right then and there whose bed it was that he'd found Naruto in that morning.
Naruto turned his gaze away when Kakashi looked up at him, brow raised in what could only be shock.
Sasuke seemed to realize in the next moment where Pakun had found him that morning and what it was Kakashi had just learned. His lips pursed, and the tiniest blush rose around his cheeks.
"Oh, well due to what i've just been told i think it best we look at splitting you guys up afterall."
"What?" Sakura whirled around. "No!"
She had her eyes locked on Naruto, and he knew she wasn't about to just let it go. Sakura wasn't just going to let the opportunity she'd been hoping for walk away from her.
"What were you just told?" Her hands were on her hips challengingly, already ready to come out swinging.
"Well...it's some personal information that I don't think should be-"
"So what if we are screwing?" Sasuke blustered cutting Kakashi entirely off from his bumblings.
"Sasuke!" Naruto yelled as Sakura began to choke on her own spit. Her eyes wildly darted between the two of her teammates as she tried to grapple with the information just brought to light.
"Shut up, Naruto." Sasuke said. "I agree that in light of our unique relationship Naruto and I shouldn't be allowed on the same team again. However you will make an exception for us."
"Is that right?" Kakashi's hand twitched up at his mask where he was smoothing it in place. His eyes narrowed on Sasuke.
"Sasuke." Naruto tried to warn him, but he was ignored with a pointed look.
"If you don't let us stay together as team 7, then you lose all 3 of us." Sasuke said confidently. "Team 7 or we all walk out of here as retired Jonin."
Naruto shifted around feeling incredibly awkward as Kakashi and Sasuke's death glares faced off.
"Naruto?" Kakashi asked.
"He's in." Sasuke answered for him, and walked across the room to pull him in front of Kakashi's desk. And Naruto guessed he was in now. If he didn't join new team 7, and one of them got hurt out on a mission Naruto would blame himself for not being there.
"And Sakura what do you say?" Kakashi motioned between Naruto and Sasuke. She squirmed a bit under everyone's scrutiny, then recovered. "Are you willing to stake your job over this?" She came to stand between Naruto and Sasuke grabbing both of their hands between hers.
"I'm with team 7. It's either all of us, or none of us."
Sasuke looked suddenly both very proud, and full of himself.
Then the 3 of them were stood together looking like a united front in front of their sensei.
"You insubordinate little brats-" Kakashi started and Naruto thought they were about to receive the tongue lashing of a life time. Then Kakashi spun in a little circle with his chair throwing his head back with laughter. "i've never been so proud."
Sasuke had a satisfied smile. While Naruto and Sakura exchanged a brief 'Can't believe that actually worked.' look with one another.
Kakashi was fumbling in his desk, and pulled out some papers. "Sign these, and it's done." He told them offering out a pen.
They took turns scrawling their signatures out. Kakashi watched them in a way Naruto hadn't seem him look at any of them in years. Hopeful.
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~After~
Naruto swore. He swore he would never do this again. He never went back on his word, but for Sasuke he found he would have to.
Naruto would have to go to another funeral. Just one more. This will be the last one, Naruto promised himself. Naruto glared at his funeral dressings. Sakura had laid them out for him, she made sure they weren't wrinkled.
He almost lost his nerve when he looked over at the kunai on the table, he almost crawled back into bed. The only thing that stopped him from doing so was what he thought Sasuke would say to him if he knew he ditched his funeral. 'Scaredy cat.' Sasuke would say.
Dammit. Naruto dressed quickly, careful not to look at himself in the mirror. He'd rather not remember what he looked like today.
Sasuke's hoodie laid on the bed taunted him. He wanted to walk over and scoop it up, inhale the smell of cigarette ash, and musk, but he doesn't. If he does that he won't be able to get back up, and Sakura's on her way. Naruto doesn't want to let her see him break down again.
It won't do either of them any favors, to break down, on the day they had to bury their teammate.
Naruto sat down to wait for her at the couch. It was quiet, their apartment was never supposed to be quiet. Naruto hated that it always would be now.
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~During~
"Fuck." Naruto let out a contented sigh. "This was the best idea I've ever had." Naruto felt gooey, and tingly, and wonderful from the force of his orgasm.
Naruto liked what they had going. He liked it alot. The sex he had with Sasuke was the best sex of his life. It only got better as time went on, as Sasuke allowed himself to become more familiar with Naruto. He'd even left his hoodie in Naruto's bed the last time they screwed, and he'd stayed over again the next night when he came back for it. Naruto wondered if he'd even left it on accident.
Sasuke slapped his ass. "Agreeing to your idea, was the best idea i've ever had." The look on his face smug.
Sasuke pulled Naruto down on the bed so they were chest to chest.
Naruto ran his teeth against his jaw hard, and Sasuke shuddered. He was still pissed he'd all but been coerced into the reformation of team 7, but he got his revenge in subtle ways.
"I need a cig," Sasuke said half sitting up. "have you seen them?" He asked when he didn't see them on the table.
"Nope." Naruto said and he let the 'P' pop as he smiled gleefully into his pillow, knowing the cigarettes were at the bottom of his trash can.
"That's to bad." Sasuke said running his hand through Naruto's hair. "I'll have to find some other way to keep myself entertained."
Sasuke draped himself over Naruto. "I think i'll take a nap now." He threw one leg over Naruto until they were tangled.
"I thought you didn't cuddle after."
"I lied." Sasuke said as he looked at Naruto grinning. Something warm fluttered around Naruto's chest. Would he ever get used to Sasuke grinning at him? He looked so young, and it made Naruto wonder if this was how Sasuke had always been when they were growing up but when he was to busy pushing Naruto away to really see him. Or was this person who he was solely with Naruto? Whichever way it was Naruto hoped he kept doing whatever it was he did to deserve this version of him.
"Well maybe if you come over to mine tonight," Naruto disentangled from Sasuke. "we can continue this. We have to meet Sakura."
Sasuke groaned. "I forgot is that today?"
"Hey you were the one that wanted this." Naruto reminded him without pity. "Now get dressed."
Sasuke flopped back into the pillow with his finger in the air.
They had an hour to get to the training grounds and meet Sakura for their first official day as new team 7. Naruto wanted to get it over with, as quickly as they could. The least amount of time he had to interact with Sakura the better. He loved her he really did, but he just didn't think he'd ever be able to forgive her. Naruto guessed it was only fair all members of team 7 had their own special issues with each other.
A noise at Sasuke's window broke his concentration as Naruto tugged on the first pants he could grab off the floor. Naruto opened the window to let in Sakura's summon. The slug. It didn't bother greeting Naruto it just dropped a letter onto the table and popped away. The slug didn't seem to much like him anymore.
Naruto sat back on the bed to rip the envelope open.
Naruto,
You're still coming right? Sorry i overshot, and i'm already here. I'm really looking forward to this, you know? Also again, thank you Naruto. I know you weren't thrilled, but i really think this will be for the best for all of us. Maybe we could go to ichiraku after?
See you guys soon
xoxo Sak
Naruto crumbled the note without a second thought to Sasuke lying beside him. He must have read the note over his shoulder, because he asked about it the next second.
"Why don't you see Sakura anymore?"
Naruto dropped the crumbled note onto the floor.
Sasuke was staring at him waiting for an explanation.
"Who says I don't see Sakura anymore?" Naruto shrugged just wanting to act contrary.
"I was there in Kakashi's office you know. She acted like you rose from the dead or something."
He didn't think he felt at all like baring his soul to Sasuke when Sasuke never shared anything with him.
"Why'd you leave when the war ended?" Naruto countered.
There was a long pause when they just stared at each other. Like 2 freezing cold icebergs incapable of movement.
Didn't think so, Naruto thought when instead of answering Sasuke slid off the bed, and began gathering his clothes.
"Hurry up, if she's already there, we're already late."
Sasuke nodded then looked Naruto up and down.
"What?"
"Those," Sasuke said voice thick. "are mine." He looked at Naruto ravenously. Then Naruto looked down to see he had picked up Sasuke's pants and not his own.
"Come get them then." Naruto challenged laying back onto the bed and spreading this legs suggestively.
Sakura could wait for all Naruto suddenly cared.
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.
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~After~
Sakura came to gather him liked was planned. She straightened Naruto's tie for him, and smoothed back his hair with a comb from her purse.
The moment comes when they both stand around the kitchen table, both of them admiring Sasuke's kunai still laid just so on the mahogany.
"Naruto, would you like me-"
"No." He said flat out. "No leave them there. We can't move them. Leave them there."
"But Naruto, Sasuke said-"
"I know what he said." He hissed at her and regretted it instantly. He tried in a much gentler tone. "The caskets empty, he's not in it." Naruto shook his head as if it could ever undo the horrors permanently etched into it from the day Sasuke died. "Sasuke told us he wanted them buried with him, and he isn't in the casket Sakura so i just can't."
"Only if you're sure, i'd hate for you to regret it later."
"I won't." He swore in the same manner he had sworn he'd never attend another funeral so long as he lived.
"Allright then." She soothed. "They'll stay there. Are you ready to leave?"
.
.
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~During~
They were an hour late, but exactly on time.
Sakura was standing under a large tree with shade when they finally made it to the training ground. She wasn't alone. Sai was there.
Naruto and Sasuke had walked together to get there, and Sai gave Naruto the slightest eye over it but ultimately nothing was said on the matter.
"I made this for you." Sai told Naruto after a few minutes of catching up. "For making Jonin. I've heard it's customary to exchange gifts on special occasions. And when Sakura told me you weren't hiding in your house an-" Sakura elbowed him in the ribs, and avoided Naruto's eyes.
Naruto sighed. Sai gave him that look that Naruto could never make heads or tools of. Was he happy or sad? The hell if Naruto knew.
"Oh i-" Naruto bristled, he wasn't used to getting gifts, it was awkward. "Thanks"
Naruto unwrapped it not at all expecting what it was.
"Oh thanks Sai i like it." Naruto said as he turned the orange bowl around. It was glossy and the way it hit the light was pretty.
"That's not the best part." Sai smiled which was a move that made Naruto nervous. "Look on the bottom."
Naruto flipped it over and immediately tried to shove it back into the wrappings, but Sasuke wrenched it out of his hands.
"Lets see it." Sasuke pushed Naruto back halfheartedly.
"Give it back." Naruto demanded already feeling the humiliation setting in.
Sasuke flipped the bowl over and his eyes grew as big as saucers when he saw it.
A hand painted Naruto that was butt ass naked except for the tiny leaf that barely covered his dick. Naruto's face burned.
"Oh my god." Sasuke gasped out, and tears sprang to his eyes from laughing so hard. "You're face. Look at you're face."
"What?" Sakura cried at being left out. "What about his face."
Sasuke tossed the bowl over to her and she caught it with ease mid air. Her own cheeks reddened. "Sai." She said "you can't just paint people in the nude it's rude." She tossed it to Sai.
"Oh?" He said suddenly deflated. "You don't like it, Naruto?"
"I um-" Naruto floundered. Then Sasuke picked it back up from Sai's hands gently, and gave it back to Naruto.
"He loves it!" Sasuke said still laughing every other word. Sasuke turned to face Naruto. "You do love it, don't you?"
"I love...it Sai. Really." Naruto held the bowl up like a trophy. "I'll use it all the time." He lied.
Sasuke snorted and Naruto considered smacking him over the head with the X rated bowl in his hand.
Sai left them with a satisfied albeit creepy smile. When he was long out of their sight, Naruto threw the bowl onto the ground hoping it might shatter, it didn't.
"There is no fucking way i'm going to use that thing." Then Sasuke erupted back into another fit of laughter.
"Sometimes Sai is so bizarre he out does himself, you know?" Sakura said.
Then from where he was picking the bowl back up and dusting it off Sasuke sighed. "That's what you guys get for trying to replace the original."
"Put that down." Naruto told him.
"Someone sounds like maybe they're a little bit jealous of Sai." Sakura commented. "I've always thought maybe he had a little crush on Naruto, and now i'm sure. I mean a nude painting?" Sakura giggled. "You've got competition Sasuke."
"I'm not worried about Sai."
"Oh yeah?" Sakura challenged. "Why not?"
Sasuke narrowed his eyes. "Well Naruto's not wearing Sai's pants right now is he?" He pointed out to her.
Sakura looked at Naruto for a brief second in which they both looked away from embarrassed.
"So have you guys always been..." Naruto refused to even entertain that question.
"Leave the stupid bowl." Naruto hissed as Sasuke walked towards his pack. "Let the animals have it."
"Are you kidding?" Sasuke asked putting it in the zip up back pack he brought. "I just found the world's most amazing cereal bowl, and it didn't cost me a dime."
.
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~After~
Naruto didn't know what to do with his hands. What did you do with your hands at a funeral? After the countless number of funerals Naruto attended he still didn't know. So they hung limply at his sides, as he listened to the speech Kakashi had prepared.
The casket is black. Naruto still thought it was stupid to have a casket. Sasuke burned up in a fire, and so what was the point of a casket if it was going to be empty? It's in the center of the proceedings. Someone adorned it with all manners of flowers lillies, and daffodils, and tulips, and Naruto didn't want to cry but his throat got choked up when he spotted the little pink blooms from a Sakura tree. Had Kakashi added that he wondered? Or perhaps Sakura had found the time in between maintaining the hospital, and wiping her mess of a teammate off of his kitchen floor. She was an amazing multitasker.
Sakura was just amazing. If it weren't for her sitting next to him in the pew Naruto quite felt he'd simply float away. He'd simply stop existing then and there. Sakura was the only thing keeping him grounded.
Sakura fussed with the cufflinks on his jacket, and Naruto heard someone clear their throat. The entirety of the room is looking at him, Kakashi's asked if he wanted to say a few words. His first instinct was to book it out of the room, and then Sakura is shaking her head for him, and Kakashi continued on.
Someone started to read a poem, and Naruto has heard it before at the other funerals. That poem gets alot of traffic at funerals, he thought.
Do not stand, By my grave, and weep. I am not there, I do not sleep—
Naruto remembered the way Sasuke woke up in the mornings bleary eyed and bitchy, and warm against Naruto.
I am the thousand winds that blow. I am the diamond glints in snow. I am the sunlight on ripened grain, I am the gentle, autumn rain.
Naruto remembered the way Sasuke would constantly be sharpening his kunai, his face concentrated entirely on the task at hand.
As you awake with morning's hush, I am the swift, up-flinging rush, Of quiet birds in circling flight. I am the day transcending night.
Naruto remembered when they were kids, and they'd fish together by the creek near Sasuke's house. Their legs dangled off the dock, and the day was sunny and it was perfect Konoha weather.
Do not stand, By my grave, and cry— I am not there, I did not die.
Lastly Naruto remembered Sasuke's achingly beautiful face with that smirk, the signature smirk Naruto always thought of as 'The Sasuke'.
Then he gasped out loud as he imagined that achingly beautiful face being destroyed. His throat clenched unable to take another breath as the image of Sasuke's skin melting from his bone slashed through his mind. Sakura had told him it hadn't hurt when Sasuke died. That it happened so fast he wouldn't have felt anything at all...Naruto didn't know if he believed that.
Sasuke deserved something more than that tired poem. It was overused, and it wasn't special enough for the man that was Sasuke Uchiha. That fucking poem. Fucking Kakashi probably picked it. Naruto grimaced and tried to stare holes through Kakashi's stupid fucking mask. And Naruto knows he wouldn't have had to pick the poem if Naruto had been at all present when the funeral arrangements were made, but he hadn't he had forced it all off on Kakashi, and maybe Naruto was being to hard on him. Kakashi picked the poem for Sasuke, and he had loved Sasuke. Naruto was an asshole, Sasuke would call him one right now if he could but he couldn't...
"He's dead." The words are ugly. Sakura squeezed his hand the only sign she had heard him. "He fucking died." Naruto muttered to himself. "And he isn't ever coming back." Naruto had let go of Sakura's hand to grasp at the golden medallion around his throat. He rubbed it in small soothing circles. "Sasuke is dead." It doesn't feel real, and so Naruto said it again. "Sasuke was killed." People sitting around them were starting to turn their heads in their direction. Naruto didn't care if they stared, they'd find out soon enough that Naruto had completely lost it.
What a waste Naruto thought to himself. He'd forged himself into the perfect hero for this village spilt his blood for it, then the war came and crashed into him. The war had split him right open, and for 2 years he only found his peace in the bottom of a bottle. Then after that, right as he made his hero's comeback with Sasuke by his side, Sasuke had to go and die leave Naruto to wash out all over again. What a waste.
Then suddenly it was all to much. "Naruto do-" Naruto stood up. He ignored the shocked murmuring, and the way Kakashi's words started to falter.
Naruto pulled the tie at his neck loose, it felt like he was suffocating being in this room with that casket, and these people who barely even knew Sasuke. He started looking for an exit desperately. He got as far as one foot in the aisle when he's stopped.
Shikamaru's leading him back to his seat next to a dreadful looking Sakura.
"Hey." Shakimaru whispered. "Hey. It's okay. You can do this."
"I can't." Naruto looked up as if he'd find all the answers he'd ever been looking for in the vaulted ceiling of this place. "I can't do this Shikamaru."
"Yes, you can." His team leader voice came out, and Naruto snapped to attention out of his control. "You are Naruto fucking Uzumaki." Shikamaru whispered to him as loudly as he dared. "You are one of the bravest men i've ever known, and it isn't fair that we've sat through more than our fair share of these things. It isn't. We shouldn't fucking be here. But you know how i know, you can do it again this time?"
Naruto shook his head, and Shikamaru brought his head down to his. "Because you loved Sasuke with everything you ever had. Ever since the very beginning you loved him with your all, and there is no way you would just walk away from him here at the end."
Shikamaru put Naruto between him and Sakura, and that was how Naruto made it through the rest of the service. With Sakura patting at him, and gently wiping away his tears, and with Shikamaru holding up the majority of his body weight for him as he went numb.
To be continued...