Prompt: Can you do a fanfic where Callen asks for Densi's advice on wedding planning please.
A/N: A touch of serious conversation, a good deal of humor, and our favorite blue-eyed guys getting up to shenanigans.
I mistakenly misread this as Deeks versus Densi only after I'd written and posted the fic.
Special shout out to all my guest reviewers and readers who I cannot said direct responses to!
"Deeks, you got a minute?" Callen asked, sliding his chair across bullpen to fetch up against Kensi's desk. It was just the two of them right now; Kensi was busy with a translation upstairs and Sam had taken his dad to one the endless appointments that came with being a caregiver.
"Sure. Fair warning, I charge a nominal fee for all legal advice, although I'm happy to be paid in sushi or tacos," Deeks answered, finishing a sentence on a case report before he briefly met Callen's eyes. "Seriously though, what do you need?"
"Fortunately I'm not in need of a lawyer, because I'm all out tacos. I do have a three-year-old Cliff bar in my go-bag I've been saving for a time when I'm feeling really desperate."
"Mm, temping, but I'll pass."
"I actually wanted your advice about the wedding. We're getting pretty close to the date we have in mind, and Anna and I really haven't gotten anything done yet," Callen admitted. "And now we're getting pushback from Arkady. Among others."
Pushing back from his desk, Deeks crossed his arm behind his head, and inhaled sharply between his teeth. "Oh, that's a tough one."
"I figured since you and Kensi took roughly half a year to decide anything wedding related, I figured you'd be an expert."
"That's extremely hurtful," Deeks said lightly. "But you guys are lucky you had tables to sit at because we almost missed sending in our deposit." He twirled a pen between his right fingers. "Ok, what have you done so far?"
"We've tested a lot of wine," Callen said with a shrug. "Though we kind of do that most nights now, so I'm not sure it really counts."
Deeks pursed his lips. "Uh-huh. Have you considered eloping?"
"Yep. But Arkady has already threatened dismemberment if we even think of having anything less than a church wedding with everyone single person we've ever met, followed by a ridiculously extravagant reception." Leaning against the back of the chair, Callen spread his hands out as if encompassing the problem.
"I didn't realize Arkady was even remotely religious," Deeks commented.
"He's not, but apparently Anna can't get married anywhere besides a church. Anna's had to forbid him from trying to buy one several times." Callen made an exasperated sound. "And I honestly have zero interest in any of it. Anna doesn't either. I think she wants something a lot more relaxed with friends and family, but apparently that doesn't matter."
While Deeks had ultimately enjoyed his and Kensi's wedding—well the non-Kirkin parts—he remembered the overwhelming pressure for perfection. It was enough to make a person want to flee to the nearest Elvis impersonator with a license to marry.
"Ok, so tell that to Arkady. And my mom, because I know she's thrown in way more than her two-cents," Deeks suggested. He saw Callen about to object, so he held up a finger. "Yes, I know they'll be extremely difficult, and complain, and threaten everything from murder to spontaneous death, but," he paused significantly. "This is your life. This is about you and Anna loving each other, and everyone else celebrating that love. Tell them what you want, whether it's town hall, or dressed up as Han Solo and Princess Leia in the middle of a forest."
"I think you might be confusing us with Eric and Nell," Callen said, but Deeks saw the gratitude in his eyes.
"You get my point. Plan the wedding that will make you happy."
"What if that includes everyone dressing up like fairies?" Callen asked with a smirk.
"As long as you get Sam in a tutu and wings, I'll be there. I prefer blue by the way," Deeks said without missing a beat, which elicited a grin and shake of his head from Callen.
"Thanks, Deeks."
"Anytime, brother." They sat in companionable silence for a few moments until Deeks nudged Callen's shoulder. "I'll give you a hundred bucks if you ask Sam to wear a green sparkly tutu."
"Deal," Callen agreed, reaching over for a fist bump.
A/N: If you'll recall, in an episode this season, Fatima suggested that Callen have a fairy themed wedding.