A/N: I got the following story idea from another fic I read recently. This topic was touched on a little with Kensi after she recovered from her injuries in season 8. However, since we've never gotten the chance to follow Deeks' recovery in depth (aside from post-Sidorov, which skips over most of the physical and even psychological aftermath), I decided to explore that here. Takes place post "To Live and Die in Mexico".
"Mm," Kensi murmurs, running her hand up the bare expanse of Deeks' back, her other hand curled around the base of his skull, urging him even closer. They're curled around each other, stripped down to his boxers and her bra and underwear.
It's the first time they've gotten this far since returning from Mexico. With a severe concussion, bruised ribs (miraculously none of them had cracked or fractured in the crash), exhaustion and dehydration, and a laundry list of other injuries, all Kensi's energy had been focused on his many appointments and medical needs.
She'd been too worried, and grateful that Deeks was alive and relatively whole, to even think about sex. For the first six weeks alone, Deeks was restricted to physical therapy, follow up doctor appointments, and then back home to rest. The debilitating headaches, light sensitivity, and lingering vertigo with nausea had also put a damper on any extracurricular activities. It broke Kensi's heart to see him in such a state.
It had been a slow and painful process to get back to something approaching normal, but finally they were getting closer. Yesterday, Deeks had taken his board down to the beach for the first time, though hadn't dared to attempt any waves.
Then after dinner, one kiss had turned into several, and before Kensi knew it, they were tearing at each other's clothes, which led to their current situation.
Arching her back, Kensi curves her leg over Deeks' hip, desperate to touch as much of him as possible. It's like some kind of switch has been flipped and suddenly three months' worth of suppressed desire and need fill her.
"Kensi," Deeks groans, his abs quivering as she skims her nails across his skin. The sight of his flushed cheeks, extending down his neck and the very top of his chest, sends a deep wave of arousal through her.
He kisses her deeply, pressing more hot kisses along her neck until he reaches her breasts. His hands tremble at her hips, mouth soft and so wonderfully familiar as he pushes aside one lacy cup, and Kensi arches into him again, urging him as close as possible.
Deeks stops abruptly, shaking his head with a frustrated sound in the back of his throat, dropping his head to Kensi's chest.
"Babe, what's wrong?" she asks, raising her head in sudden concern. God, if she's broken something… "Is it your ribs?"
He lifts his head just enough for her to see his eyes, which bear the same frustration she'd heard in his voice. "I can't." He shakes his head regretfully. "I want this so much, Kensi, but it's not going to happen. I'm sorry," Deeks sighs, embarrassment tinging his cheeks now
Kensi cups his cheeks, suddenly understanding the source of his embarrassment. "Deeks, that's ok," she assures him. "We don't need to rush anything."
"I thought I was ready," he says, rolling onto his back, and pressing the back of his hand to his forehead. "I wanted to be."
"Hey, we'll get there." She kisses his cheek, but it doesn't change the dark look in his eyes.
"What if there's something wrong with me now? You know, after the TBIs. Maybe that part of my brain is permanently damaged."
"Baby, I'm sure it's not that, but we can ask about it at your next neuro appointment," she says, edging closer. "And in the meantime, I'm in no rush, and I have zero expectations."
Deeks softens a little as she starts caressing his sides again. "So, we can make out, and it doesn't have to lead anywhere."
He closes his eyes briefly, inhaling deeply, then surges across the small space, kissing her long and deep.
"I love you," he whispers when he pulls away. Kensi curls into his chest, grateful for this, for any part of him she can have.