If you read Bloodmoon, you know what you expect.

It had been just a typical day for Mondstadt's Quartermaster and Cavalry Captain. He'd gone to work, done some of his paperwork, then made his way to the mansion to complete any work there related to the Winery and reassure Adelinde that he was fine. Overall, it was a normal day.

Right up until it wasn't.

If only he hadn't looked at that damn Vision, if he had left it in the drawer it always stayed in then he wouldn't be here praying to a god that was never going to listen. Why should they? Kaeya was a sinner, simply allowing him to live in their nation was more mercy than he deserved. But that didn't mean Diluc had to be punished for his existence. So he prayed- begged for a miracle. All he wanted was for his brother to be okay, for him to live. If it meant that the dim glow of his brother's Vision brightened, Kaeya would do anything. He would gladly sell his soul- or whatever was left of it– if it meant his brother survived. He'd make any deal and give anything for Diluc.

As it was, Kaeya was kneeling on the floor of his childhood bedroom, clutching the dimming Vision that had belonged to his older brother. It was the only thing that allowed him to know if the redhead was dead or alive, the only thing he had left, and right now Diluc wavered dangerously close to death. Rather than the vibrant, pulsing crimson he'd grown accustomed to seeing, the elemental stone held in his hands was nearly grey, with only the faintest shimmer of red in its depths. And there was nothing the Khaenri'ahn could do, Diluc was- Stars knew where he was– and he was a sinner- a traitor. No matter how much he asked them to swap their places, the gods weren't going to listen to someone like him. The world didn't need another sinner, it needed the bright light that was Diluc Ragvindr.

He just needed one of them to spare Diluc. For that, Kaeya would gladly pay any price.

✦•—✧—• ⟡ ✦ ⟡ •—✧—•✦

At some point, without him realizing it, Kaeya had fallen asleep on the floor of his old bedroom. Upon waking up, the Khaenri'ahn let out a groan and scrubbed the sleep from his eye. Then his gaze drifted to the window, drawn by the patter patter sound on the glass. It was raining. Great. Letting out a sigh the blue-haired man pushed himself off the floor making his way to the door. He really should be getting back to the city, he'd promised Charles he'd pick up his shift.

When he opened the door to his room, Kaeya was met with a familiar mane of crimson hair. His eye drifted up and cool periwinkle met warm ruby for the first time since that night. Stars he'd missed his brother, and for a moment he wanted to pull him into a hug. But he didn't have that right anymore, he shouldn't even be here.

Diluc might not have gone through the legal steps to remove the Khaenri'ahn from the family before he had left the city of freedom, but he had made it clear enough to Kaeya that he was no longer welcome on any of the properties owned by the Ragnvindr clan. It was something that Kaeya had respected for the most part, aside from occasionally stopping by to fill out any necessary paperwork. He was still a legal heir after all, and until that was officially revoked, Kaeya wasn't going to let the business suffer. Aside from business though, the blue-haired man rarely stepped foot in his childhood home unless Adelinde made him. He didn't even introduce himself as Kaeya Ragnvindr anymore, despite it being his legal name. He went as far as to pick up his former last name Alberich unofficially, an act that had felt even more of a betrayal than just simply being a spy for his cursed homeland; it felt like spitting on the kindness Father– Master Crepus had shown him all those years ago. But still, Diluc had made it clear that he wasn't a Ragnvindr, he had no right to the name no matter how much it hurt. "Lu- Diluc," he half whispered as his estranged brother pulled him into a hug almost as if he'd read his mind.

"Kae," murmured his brother as he held the younger male close. "I'm so sorry. I couldn't– our father– I'm sorry."

Confusion creased Kaeya's face as he tried to work through the words. Diluc hadn't… hadn't what? And what did their father have to do with… worry overtook the confusion and Kaeya pulled back from the hug enough to look at his brother's face. What he found only perplexed him further. Diluc looked exactly the same. Despite the years his brother had been traveling, he didn't look a day past eighteen. Then Kaeya's thoughts halted.

It wasn't real. It couldn't be. Because Kaeya had been holding his brother's fading Vision and now the elemental stone was secured at Diluc's hip. His brother wasn't actually here, he was still out there somewhere, almost certainly dying while Kaeya relived the worst night of his life– his greatest mistake. His brother was going to die and there was nothing the Khaenri'ahn could do, there was no amount of prayers that would get the gods to listen to someone like him.

He was always destined to lose everything.

He'd take this single moment of comfort, though, even if it was just a dream; a cruel joke by the gods. Kaeya could pretend just for a moment that Diluc didn't hate him, that he wasn't out in some unknown corner of Teyvat, slowly dying while Kaeya remained in Mondstadt. The younger man returned the hug, leaned into the touch, laid his head on the redhead's shoulder as he had done so many times before. Then he heard himself whisper in a soft voice the five words he dreaded every time. "We need to talk. Outside." He didn't want this, he wanted to stay here in his big brother's arms where everything was okay, but he was a prisoner to his own mind. The only thing he could do was watch those familiar events play out for the hundredth time.

When they'd both stepped outside, Kaeya's world suddenly shifted. His ears felt like they were stuffed with cotton and he could barely hear the pounding of the rain, or his own voice as he spilled all his secrets to the older male. Good. He didn't want to hear the words again. What he couldn't escape was Diluc's expression. He watched as a look of despair overtook his brother's features, then as it slowly morphed into an unyielding rage.

Kaeya was already familiar with that look.

Like clockwork, the conversation devolved into a fight and within seconds Diluc was swinging his claymore. Kaeya dodged the swing, like he always did, but he refused to counterattack. This was a fight he wanted to lose. It had been from the beginning.

Except—

His body moved on its own. Kaeya had lived this nightmare a thousand times and without fail it was always the same. He provoked Diluc, Diluc attacked, Kaeya pretended to care about his own existence, and the appearance of a Vision saved his life when it should have ended. This time, though, he almost stabbed Diluc.

Kaeya's heart lurched. The nightmare had never changed before, it wasn't supposed to– fury ignited in his brother's eyes and the claymore swung for his head again, but the Khaenri'ahn ducked under it easily enough. Kaeya could only watch helplessly as a new scene unfolded. He was fighting back when he shouldn't, was parrying when he was supposed to take a hit, stabbing into openings when he was meant to create distance. It was all so wrong.

No, no no no this was not how this was supposed to go, he had to lose, he had to pay for his sins, and what better way than by the hand of the brother he loved so dearly? That was how he'd planned it, it was supposed to be the perfect end to all the secrets and lies. Except in practice it wasn't. He was slowly pushing Diluc back as they fought, despite the Pyro vision that rested on Diluc's hip. A Visionless sinner was beating someone blessed by the gods. If he wasn't so desperate to lose, Kaeya might have laughed at the irony behind it. But he was more afraid he might accidentally kill the redhead if the fight drew on for too long. As it was, it was clear as day that the elder Ragnvindr was quickly running out of the energy needed to continue the fight, while Kaeya only seemed to grow stronger.

Still, despite his clear exhaustion, Diluc managed to land a hit that had the Khaenri'ahn sprawling to the ground as it knocked the wind from him. Kaeya breathed a sigh of relief. Yes, this was how the fight was supposed to go. Any minute his elder brother would go for that final blow and everything would be over. The gods would give him his Vision and Diluc would leave him to die in the rain.

At least, that's how it was supposed to go.

Kaeya could already tell something was wrong before it happened. He could feel the sudden drop in temperature and he knew something went wrong. The Vision was too early. His panic swelled instantly, threatening to tear him apart from the inside, but it only seemed to hasten the chill creeping into his bones.

Cryo exploded around him, bitterly cold elemental energy radiating around him in an attempt to ward off the threat, but there was none. Diluc hadn't called forth Dawn; without the Pyro phoenix, he was defenseless against the frozen spikes that raced towards him. He had no way to stop the blow as the ice pierced through him.

The color drained from his face as Kaeya locked his gaze on his brother, the other's chest heaving as he tried to breathe despite the icicle impaling him through the abdomen. He stood there for a moment before he collapsed to the ground like a puppet whose strings had been cut. Sound bled back into his world, but all he could hear was the pounding of the rain as reality set in. "Luc," the Khaenri'ah heard himself yell as he scrambled to reach the redhead who by this point was unnaturally pale, laying in a mix of blood and mud. This wasn't how any of this was supposed to go, it was supposed to be him dying on the ground, not Diluc. A humorless laugh bubbled from his throat as he knelt on the icy ground pulling his brother into his arms. For fuck's sake, when he had asked the gods to swap their places, this isn't what he meant. They had listened to his prayers only to answer them in the cruelest way possible.

Of course they'd give him exactly what he asked for, if in the most twisted way possible. Diluc wouldn't die in a foreign nation. No, he was going to die right here in Kaeya's arms, while he was powerless to stop it.

Kaeya drew in a shaky breath, "Oh Luc," he whispered, pressing his face into the crook of his older brother's neck, not caring if he was covered in blood; it didn't matter anymore. "I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to– it wasn't supposed to go like that. It should have been me."

The redhead let out a wet cough as he reached up a hand to run his fingers through blue locks, trying to offer comfort to the younger male, "It's okay Kae…" he took a labored breath before adding, "'m sorry you're my little brother… I shouldn't have said otherwise."

For a long moment, Kaeya didn't respond to his brother's words, trying desperately to wrap his head around what was happening in that moment. How long had he longed to hear those words from his brother? How many nights had he laid awake wishing against all hope that Diluc still thought of them as brothers? How cruel was it that he got to hear exactly what he wanted to hear only as his brother was dying in his arms? "Luc," he whispered, "you shouldn't…" the Khaenri'ahn couldn't finish the sentence. Instead, he let out a choked sob and murmured, "I'm sorry."

No more words were spoken between the two as Kaeya held onto his dying brother as the storm raged around them. It was only after Diluc's Vision had faded to grey and he had cooled that Kaeya finally moved, the fifteen-year-old's body protesting vehemently after kneeling on the ground for so long. He ignored the throbbing of his own injuries. It didn't matter anymore, Diluc was gone and it was all his fault. The last Ragnvindr cast one last look towards his childhood home before he wandered off to tend to his own injuries, leaving his newly granted vision behind with his brother.

It was better off in his hands anyway.

✦•—✧—• ⟡ ✦ ⟡ •—✧—•✦

Jolting awake Kaeya sucked in a shaky breath, willing his heart to stop racing. Had it all been a dream after all? It had felt so terrifyingly real and part of him was still convinced it was. Then he remembered Diluc's dying Vision. Instantly he shot up, ignoring the way his entire spine protested the movement, and searched for the stone. He didn't have time to worry about anything else, he had to know if Diluc was alright. For a long, painful moment, it was nowhere to be found. Then he spotted a glowing red orb under the bed and snatched it up. Cradling it in his palms, Kaeya inspected the Vision, then sighed with relief. It was warm in his hands and glowing a bright, steady crimson.

Diluc was fine.

His brother wasn't dead, he hadn't joined their father someplace Kaeya had no hope of ever following. The blue-haired man let out a sigh as he cradled the pyro Vision closely, intending to never let it out of his sight until the day his brother returned.

Because Diluc would return, of that he was sure.

So... hope that all made sense. If it didn't I, your lovely guide Fae, will explain. The meat of Bluemoon is, in fact, a dream. Kaeya kind of bounces back and forth on whether or not it actually is one though. Also, this is the beginnings of our rewrite of Tracing Starlit Memories, for those of you who may have read it. Bloodmoon, Diluc's half of this fiasco, will also be getting a rework as I am personally dissatisfied with certain parts of it. That will get updated sometime between now and April, and will just be a quiet update. It may also be getting a part two, but that remains to be seen.

Anyway, we hope you enjoyed and have a very good day!

And happy birthday, Kaeya! I'd apologize for the crimes we likely committed in writing this but I'm really not sorry and neither is Storm!