2 months later (5 months pregnant)

Regina pov

Its time for our gender reveal party. Its been so hard keeping this secret. Neither of us can wait for everyone to find out. Everyone is waiting on the fireworks to start now. We have a snack table with some basic snacks and little cute cupcakes that say prince or princess on them. Our baby shower will be closer to the due date. But this is so people know how to shop for their gifts and stuff for that if they want to get us anything. Ruby walks up to us and hugs us both. "Hey guys. You about ready to start the show? Everyone is excited to find out what your little one is. You know you can tell me first and ill keep it secret. I promise." She winks. "Nice try Rubes. Regina would kill me if i told you. She has been planning this for months." I smack Emmas arm. "Hey, i would only maim you. Not kill you. Youre good for some stuff." I wink and laugh.

"Ok Emma, lets go get this started. See you in a few minutes Ruby." Emma and i combine our magic into little spheres that we will throw into the air to explode into beautiful fireworks. We do a bunch of plain white ones and the finale will be the gender. Hot pink for girl and royal blue for boy. We grab the spheres and go to stand in front of the group of people gathered. "Are you guys ready to find out whether the baby will be a prince or a princess?" I shout over the crowd. Everyone claps and Ruby wolf whistles. I see Belle jab her in the side but she has a big smile on her face. They are so happy.

Emma throws the first sphere and white sparkles burst into the air and all we hear is ohhs and ahhs. The pattern follows as we take turns until its just the colored ones left. Both of us prepare and toss up 3 each of the colored spheres and suddenly the sky erupts in a beautiful hot pink explosion. People start screaming and clapping as they realize we are having a little girl. Ruby, Belle, Tink, Ariel, Violet, and Henry come up to us.

Henry pulls me into a huge hug, picking me up and twirling me in the process. "A baby sister! Thank you moms, this is the best news ever! Do you have a name picked out yet?" Emma laughs and grabs Henry into a hug of his own. "Not yet kid, we are narrowing it down but we havent decided yet." I nod in agreement. "And even when we do finally pick it, we arent telling anyone until the baby is born. She deserves to have a naming day like any other royal baby. You only didnt get one because everyone was cursed and didnt know you were royal." Henry shrugs. "Im not really royalty mom. Im just me." I place my hands on his face gently and have his eyes meet mine. "Henry Daniel Mills, you are every bit the royal that this baby will be. First of all you are mine which automatically makes you a prince, secondly you are your mothers which makes you a prince by blood as well as adoption. You are every bit mine as this baby is. You need to know that. You need to believe it. Because you are so very loved my beautiful boy."

Henry lays his head on my shoulder and i feel a single tear wet my shirt. "Thanks mom. I needed to hear that. I love you." I kiss his forehead. "I love you too baby boy. As long as im living, my baby you'll be." Emma pulls me into her side at that and rubs my arm. How i got so lucky in the friends and family department i will never know.

Tink crosses her arms and playfully frowns at me. "I for sure thought you were having another boy. I didnt use fairy dust or anything to find out but i can't believe i was wrong. Im very happy for you though. Maybe Ariel and I will get lucky and have a boy after we get married." Ariel smacks her arm. And Ruby grabs Ariels left hand. "What exactly is this now? Are you two engaged and never told us? How long?" Ariel blushes and pulls her hand back. Tink just looks proud. "Only since last night. We didnt want to steal your thunder tonight so we were going to wait until tomorrow to tell you. But big mouth over here cant keep exciting news to herself for 5 minutes." I smile a huge smile. I really thought Belle and Ruby would be next. But i guess not. "Are you kidding Ariel? Of course we would want to know as soon as possible. Im so happy for you both. And the fact you are already thinking about babies is fantastic. Maybe this little girl will have someone to grow up with."

Henry clears his throat. "Uhm… about that mom. Vi come here please." He waves Violet in front of him. "I cant keep this from you so, here goes. Moms, Violet is pregnant. Its still really early but we found out 2 weeks ago. So baby sister will have a niece or nephew around her age to grow up with. Violet is 2 months now. Mom please dont cry, this is good news." I didnt even realize i was crying. "No Henry. Im not upset or angry. Im happy for you son. Im going to be a grandma. Henry Daniel, you made me a grandma in my thirties." I gruff at him. "Kinda hard not to when you are in your thirties for 28 years mom." Emma laughs. "Kid has a point babe. Im excited for you Henry. And you two as well Ariel and Tink. This is going to be a crazy year. But its going to be beautiful." Emma kisses me softly before grabbing Violet into a soft hug and Henry after.

My baby is having a baby. Hes barely an adult and is already making grown choices. "What are you going to do about school? Are you going to keep going?" Henry and Violet both nod. "We discussed it and have decided to get a place here and do school via online and correspondence classes. Obviously we will drive there for finals of every class but it will be lectures on zoom calls and mailing in projects mainly. Im getting a job here in town. I dont know what yet but maybe i can help out in the Mayors office as an apprenticeship for law. Vi is going to get a job until the baby comes. Shes talking about changing career paths to go into teaching. She thinks she wants to open a proper daycare center here." Wow, they seem to have a solid plan.

"Of course you can come work for the mayors office. Our resident lawyer has needed an apprentice for a while. Hes getting older and will need someone to tag him out eventually so he can retire." Violet leans into Henrys chest and looks up at him. "Baby im getting tired. Im gonna go home for the night. Thank you for being so understanding Regina, Emma. I love you both. Congratulations on the baby girl. Henry is beyond excited to be a big brother. And a daddy too." Henry hugs us one last time as Violet starts to walk away. "Hold up Vi im coming with you. Love you moms. Talk to you tomorrow."

"Wow. That was just… a lot of wonderful information thrown at us. A wedding at some point and a baby in 32 weeks. Just a lot of information." Emma seems on the verge of a minor freakout. I cant believe im the calm one when our son is having a baby. I feel some strong kicks and i know it will help calm Emma down. So i grab her hand and place it where our baby girl is kicking. Emma gets down on her knees and kisses my belly before she starts talking. "Hey there baby girl. Youre kicking mommy awfully hard. If you could ease it up a bit so you don't accidentally hurt mommy it would be awesome." The kicks slow down a bit but are just softer. Like the baby understands what her momma is saying. Shes such a good listener already.

"You two are so cute! Getting to see this softer side of both of you is such a great thing. Ruby and i are going to head home for the night. We will see you all later. I love you guys." Belle said as she grabbed Rubys hand. "Yea love you both. Congrats on the baby girl. Bye guys." Ruby said over her shoulder. "We better get going too. Come on Tink. Congratulations again you two. Love you." Ariel said as Tink just waved as she walked away.

2 months later (Regina 7months, Violet 4months)

Emma pov

Only 2 months until our little princess is born. Regina is in that nesting phase and getting everything ready for when our little angel is here. We are still bouncing around on names. I think we should have another H name to go with Henry but then Regina says we are locked in to H names for future children. So we are steering away from H names for now. Im liking some A names but Regina is in love with a couple N names. Im sure whatever name we pick will be beautiful. I just want a healthy happy baby and a healthy happy wife. Luckily Regina has only had bad back aches a few times and ive been able to help with a deep massage. The coco butter on her belly has kept her stomach from getting any stretch marks so far. Im sure they will come but hopefully wont be painful for her.

I am worried about her state of mind these last few weeks though. Shes seemed very down and depressed. I know hormones are a bitch but when shes down like this it scares me. I worry shes going to hurt herself again. Or worse.

Regina pov

Ive almost finished the nursery and gotten all the baby clothes we bought washed and put away. Once we have the baby shower i know we will have more to do. Ive been trying to keep myself busy as much as possible. My mind has not been in a good place lately and ive been having some bad thoughts. Its been very hard to not hurt myself again. The only thing stopping me is fear that i would accidentally go too far and endanger my baby. Ive been helping Violet get her nursery started and going shopping with her and Henry since they found a place and moved back to Storybrooke. Its nice having my baby boy back close to me.

Henry proposed to Violet last week and she said yes. They want to have a small wedding with just family before the baby is born. Hard to believe in just a few short months im going to not only have a baby at home but also a grand baby just down the road. Henry got a house just a few houses down from here. Emma and i let him dip into his trust fund to buy the house outright. Its a beautiful home with 4 bedrooms for when they want to grow their family even more. They are talking about leasing a building for Violets daycare to start up a few months after their baby is here. Shes talked to Ella about coming to join her daycare business and have her mommy and me classes there too and Ella agreed.

Im currently in the kitchen making dinner and everything in me wants to take one of these sharp knives and cut. Its been so long since i last cut i dont even remember how long to be honest. This skin crawling anxiety to do it is becoming really bad. I need Emma. I need her to talk me down. I havent told her anything about this yet. I didnt want to be that person because everything in my life is wonderful right now. I have no reason to be triggered like this. But i am. I grab my phone and call Emma. I hate to bother her at work but i need her.

The phone rings 4 times before it goes to voicemail. Ohh. I dont know if i can do this. I really need to talk to someone. Not many people know about this. I try to call Ruby and get no answer. Im about to give up. I have one more person i can call and then im just going to do it. One small cut couldnt hurt much. Ill be careful. But i have to give this last person a shot first. I call Belle and she answers after the first ring. "Hey Regina. Whats up?" I didnt realize i was crying till just now. "Belle, i need help. Can i come over please? I need someone to talk me out of hurting myself." I hear a sad sigh on the line. "Oh Regina. Of course you can come over. Do we need to stay on the phone or can you make it till you get to me?" I grab my keys and head to the car after i shut the oven off. "I can make it to you. I just need… thank you Belle. See you in a few minutes."

I drive to their place and as soon as i switch the engine off i jump out of the car and half run to their front door where Belle is standing waiting on me. She immediately pulls me into a hug and walks me into their living room and sits with me on the couch. Im shaking with the urge to cut and she grabs my hands. "Talk to me Regina. What can i do to make this easier for you?" I take a couple deep breaths before i answer, avoiding her eyes. "I just have this overwhelming urge to cut. There is no reason for it, nothing triggered me. I just need to cut. I know i shouldnt. I mean i cant right? I mean im pregnant. I have to think about the baby. If i go too far or too deep, she could die. I could die. I just… this feeling wont go away and its just getting worse. Belle i need something. I dont know what will help but i just… fuck i need to cut." I cry out.

She looks stunned for a minute and then she speaks. "Wow. Ok that was intense. Lets see if some of the research ive done will help. When you first told us, i came home and did some reading about coping mechanisms and strategies. Just in case. Can i see your arm please? Im assuming thats where you want to cut." I just nod and extend my arm to her. She gently holds my hand with one hand and drags her nails gently up and down my arm while humming low under her breath. Its strange but its helping some. Its like shes adding stimulation to where i need to cut. But healthy stimulation. "Ok Regina. While i do this i need you to take long deep breaths in and out slowly. Close your eyes and imagine a beach. The waves are coming at you very fast like your urges, i want you to imagine those waves slowing until they stop. Stop the waves Regina. Dont forget to breathe." The waves start like theres a storm in the sea, overwhelming and fast and high. But as i breathe and focus on her nails on my skin the waves get slower and smaller until the water is barely moving at all.

I take one last deep breath and open my eyes. "The waves stopped." she nods and smiles. "Did the urges stop? Your shaking stopped about 10 minutes ago so i could tell it was getting better." I reach out to hug her and she pulls me in. "Thank you Belle. I probably would have seriously done some damage to myself if you hadnt have answered. So thank you. You really helped me." Belle pulls away from the hug. "It was my pleasure Regina. Im glad i could help. Im so very glad i did some extensive research or i wouldnt have been able to help at all. Im proud of you for coming to me." I look at her and then dip my head. "If this happens again, which im sure it will, and i cant get ahold of Emma… is it ok if i come to you again?" Belle pats my knee. "Of course Regina. Come to me any time and i will do my very best to make sure you are ok. I love you, you and Emma are my best friends. Id do anything for either of you."

"I love you too Belle. I think im going to go down to the sheriffs station and find Emma. I need to talk to her about this. Ive not told anyone other than you about how bad its getting again. I cant do this to her again." Belle nods and opens the front door for me. "I think thats a good idea. She loves you and i know shes been worried. We all have. You have seemed very down lately and it made us nervous. Im glad you reached out before doing something that cant be undone. Be careful on your way to her please. Cant have anything happening to my best friend and niece." She smiles. I just laugh. "Bye Belle, thanks again." I wave and she does too as i drive off.

As i pull up to the sheriff station i get a little nervous. I dont want to disappoint Emma again. But i also know that i just had bad urges but i didnt give in to them. I didnt let them make me do something stupid. Deep breathe and then i open the car door. I walk in slowly but Emma recognizes the sound of my heels on the floor. "Hey baby." She looks at me. "Whats wrong? What happened? Are you ok?" She must be able to tell ive been crying. "Im fine now. Belle helped me. But before that i was a real danger to myself. It would have been bad had she not have answered her phone. She talked me down and gave me a brand new coping mechanism. It was the most effective one ive ever had before. I did try calling you but you must've been busy. I tried calling Ruby and got no answer, i almost gave up. Really i did. I almost just went ahead and cut. But i needed to try to do better. For myself and for you and for our baby." I place my hands protectively over my baby bump.

Emma stands and wraps me in her arms before pulling me in for a deep kiss. "Im so proud of you baby. You reached out and you conquered your urges. Im so fucking proud of you. Thank you for protecting 2 of the most important people in my life today. Im sorry i missed your call. Im so sorry i wasnt there for you when you needed me. Im so so sorry Regina. I love you and im glad beyond measure that you are still here and that you stayed strong. You are a warrior my Queen."

I start crying in her arms. I cant believe i really almost put my baby at risk today. Im so fucking stupid. I could have killed her. "Emma… im so sorry. I dont deserve you or this baby or this life. After i have this baby i think its best if i just disappear from your lives. I could have killed both of us today. I almost did Emma. I could have lost this precious little girl over something so stupid. I dont deserve to be in your lives." Emma pulls back and puts both hands on my face. "You listen to me Regina. We dont quit on each other, ever. Its you and me till we die, forever and ever no matter what. You dont get to just leave us. We… not you not me, we, are having this baby. She needs both of her moms. Henry still needs us. You dont get to give up on me. You more than deserve this life and this love. Please dont break my heart. I cant lose you." She cries. Tears pouring down her cheeks. Its so rare that she cries that its kind of shocking.

"Emma…I, Im sorry i just… i dont know what to do. I think i need to talk to Dr. Hopper about adjusting my medication. I cant keep feeling like this. I feel like im bursting at the seams and every nerve is on fire. Im an emotional wreck and i feel so lost and afraid and helpless. I feel like im ruining everything for the ones i love the most. I truly didnt mean to upset you. Im sorry." Emma pulls me back into another hug. Possibly the tightest hug ever. "I agree Dr Hopper needs to be called asap. I dont want to watch you fall apart like this and you shouldnt have to feel like this. I know a lot of it has to do with baby hormones but it just isnt fair. We were finally happy and everything was perfect. You were happy, right? Thats not just me projecting my feelings onto you?"

"I was happy, Emma. I was so happy. But i was just waiting on the other shoe to drop and for things to go south on me. They always do. You made me so happy and i was getting used to that feeling. So when the bad thoughts came trickling back in it broke me. I didnt realize that happiness was so fragile. I panicked. I froze and all i could think of was the one thing that truly helped me in the past. I fought it for weeks. Im still fighting it. Damn it. I hate this! I just need to go home and lay down to sleep. Im just so tired of fighting." I pull a chair from one of the desks at the station and sit down and put my head in my hands.

Emma rubs my back in an attempt to soothe me. "I…I think i need to be admitted temporarily into the hospital. Im not ok. Just until my meds are balanced out again. This is too much risk to the baby if i stay at home. It will be so embarrassing for me but i think its what i need to do. Can you come with me to admit myself into the psych ward? Please. I cant do this alone." I look up and see tears still streaming down Emmas face. She's heartbroken. "Yes. I can take you there. I can do whatever you need me to do. If this is what is best for you and our baby girl, we can make it through it."