'''The Paddy's Day Episode''' It's St Patrick's Day again but to er on the side of caution after Bart's drunken shenanigans last time, Mayor Quimby bans Alcohol for the day. This of course causes trouble when the southern Irish and the Northern Irish start fighting each other... And Hulk and The Thing fight...
Meanwhile Bart and Lisa trying to avoid the fighting bump into a yuppie leprechaun that runs an electronics store called the Yupprechaun.
And Marge, to escape the fighting hides in an erotic cake store. Mmmmmmm... erotic cakes...
And Homer punished for his fighting at the celebrations is made to do community service. But as he leaves he meets Dog the bounty hunter who warns him he hunts down those that skip bail. Homer decides he'd like to become a bounty hunter. Cue cameos from famous bounty hunters...
== Plot ==
The couch gag is the Simpsons sitting on the couch only to scream as they're frozen in carbonite. Boba Fett takes the frozen carbonite slab away.
...
The episode starts with the Simpsons crossing the town bridge while dressed in green for St Patrick's Day.
"I can't believe it's St Patrick's Day again..." said Bart wearing a green t shirt and green shorts.
"Well I can't believe it's not butter!" Oscar bought a tub of I can't believe it's not butter with him.
Bart grimaced exasperated.
"Aren't you glad you remembered to wear green again so you didn't get a pinching from everyone at school..." said Oscar.
"Yeah. It's alright for you! You always wear green!" said Bart, pointing to Oscar's green goggles.
"Well I have put on some green shorts just to be cautious." said Oscar. "But you paddies better wear St George's crosses on St George's day! Capishe?"
"Patriotism is racism!" Some SJWs were yelling in a protest
"Love other cultures!"
Oscar sighed. "Excuse me for a sec." he came back moments later driving a steam roller over the SJWs and killed them leaving a bloody mess.
"Oz!" Lisa whined.
"Are you happy now Oz..." Bart frowned at him.
"I'm never happy..." Oscar sighed.
"Everything is so green!" said Lisa. "Even the river has been dyed green!" Fish skeletons and barrels of radioactive waste floated to the surface.
"Actually the river is green because it is polluted with radioactive waste from my power plant." said Mr Burns magically alive some how. "But I have said too much so your lives are in grave danger..." he warned.
"Well we have green cookies! Mmmmm... green cookies..." said Oscar eating a green cookie.
"Cookies! Omnomnomnom!" Cookie Monster was eating the green cookies.
"Curse those green cookies!" Mr Burns yelled but tripped and fell screaming into the green radioactive river.
"Noooooo!" Smithers cried.
The Simpsons and Oscar shrugged and continued their journey into town to join in the festivities.
Meanwhile, Wiggum wanted a Shamrock shake at Krusty burger. Unfortunately they had ran out.
"Ran out?! Whattya mean they ran out?! It's St Paddy's day! How can you run out?!" Wiggum whined.
"Sir, they're just vanilla Krusty shakes dyed with green food dye..." said Squeaky Voiced Teen.
"No! I distinctly tasted mint in them!" Wiggum argued.
...
Eventually everyone including the Simpsons were at the carnival waiting for Quimby to start it.
Ned and his boys were there too.
"D'oh!" Homer groaned.
"It gives me great pleasure to start this booze free St Patrick's day!" said Mayor Quimby. The Mayor West thing has run its course...
Homer groaned.
Everyone except Marge booed Quimby.
"Oh come on you people! Remember what happened last time?!" said Quimby. "When little Bartholomew Simpson got drunk and was sick on the flag..." on the screen appeared a picture of Bart drunk at St Patrick's day throwing up on the USA flag.
"Oh geez! You get drunk once and they never let you live it down..." Bart sighed embarrassed. "Mom can I get a beer..."
"No!" said Marge.
Everyone got annoyed they couldn't drink.
"People please! There's more to Ireland than booze and drunk people..." said Quimby.
"No there isn't!" said Homer.
Quimby ignored him. "Why we invented the potato... the gypsy horse carriage... (The Hex and the City Gypsy was driving a horse carriage.) The shamrock shake..." said Quimby.
"Which all the Krusty Burgers have run out of!" Wiggum yelled.
The people muttered annoyed they couldn't drink.
Marge sighed. Annoyed everyone wanted to drink.
Oscar was playing a game on his Gameboy Advance where you shoot cereal mascots. He shot the Lucky Charms Leprechaun.
(Video game sounds)
"Ooooooh! No beer..." Homer groaned.
...
There was a parade.
The first float was a potato themed one about a potato shaped boy, or a boy that resembled a potato. He waved at the crowd.
"Hehehe... he's so ugly..." Homer chuckled to himself about the potato boy.
The next float was labelled "Straight Catholic Preists" there were two priests sat in different rows away from each other on the float.
"We do love children. Just only platonically! Honest!" said the priests.
Bart shivered in disgust.
Then there was a gay pride float with rainbow flags and gay men in feather boas and spiked leather outfits... Ooooh! Kinky!
"We're here! We're queer! Get used to it!" A gay man yelled into a megaphone.
"We are used to it!" said Lisa. "We're not bothered by you! Except my homophobic dad..."
"Get out of here fags!" Homer yelled throwing a shamrock shake at them.
"Homer!" Marge yelled at him.
"Then our work isn't yet complete, little girl!" said Julio.
"Julio, you know who I am! You cut my mom's hair!" said Lisa.
"Oh hi, Marge!" said Julio. The gay pride float left.
Then, unfortunately were a pride of angry Irish dressed in orange. "Ulster United!" Was on their banner and they were led by a leprechaun dressed in orange.
"Oh no! That northern Irish parade is marching into the Republic of Ireland parade!" said Lisa as the camera pans over to the leprechaun from Hex and the City leading the green clad southern Irish. Amongst them was Young Link and Toon Link.
"Narrator..." Bart groaned that I added Link to the Irish. Hehehe!
"Two kinds of Irish? What are they fighting over? Who gets to sleep in the bath tub?!" Hugo asked. Uh I don't get it...
"Prods and Caths have been at it since the before I was born!" said Grampa. "Why just yesterday I remember when I..."
But the Simpsons put their fingers in their ears and went "Lalalals! Lalalala!" Until he shut up.
"Yeah the north and south have hated each other for ages." said Moe. "Why it's as Irish as dancing without moving your arms!"
There is a river dance float with that Flatly guy with the turquoise jacket leading them.
Bart groaned. "Where's was he IRA when you need them?" Oscar slapped him. "Ow! What was that for?!"
"Shame on you! The IRA are terrorists! They invented it before the Taliban did!" Oscar yelled.
There was an Irish man with a Molotov cocktail. He could see everyone glaring at him. "Aye..." he put it out and went off somewhere then glared in disgust at a bus decorated with the Union Jack driving past.
The green Irish and the orange Irish came to blows and started fighting.
Lisa broke into the parade to pull apart the two scrapping leprechauns. "Hey break it up! break it up!" she told them off. "Why are you fighting when your country has so much beautiful things to be proud of! Like its poetry! Its country side and the most beautiful song known to man!" Lisa started singing Too rah Loo rah...
Her boyfriend Colin from the Movie joined in playing a guitar. Then everyone joined in.
"Too rah Loo rah..." everyone sung an Irish lullaby. Then the Irish made up and hugged. If only it was that easy...
We see the Irish setting aside their differences, putting away weapons like sticks and Molotov cocktails, the leprechauns hugged... however the fighting soon started again when the northern leprechaun punched the green leprechaun from Treehouse of Horror XII in the gut and the fighting got worse.
Lisa sighed disappointed as she was trapped with Colin in the riots.
"Oh no! Without booze, the Irish remember how much they hate each other!" Mayor Quimby lamented.
Suddenly the fighting was interrupted by the Incredible Hulk and the Thing plummeting out of the sky and beating the holy snot out of each other! Cooooool!
"Oscar! No!" Lisa yelled.
"Hey leave him be! That's actually what happened!" said Bart reading a Simpsons Episode guide for season twenty onwards.
"Cooooooool! Marvel!" said Oscar as he watched The Incredible Hulk and The Thing fight!
"Hulk smash! Hulk fight for Irish independence!" said Hulk.
"Yeah? Well you lummocks wouldn't know what to do with your independence!" said The Thing. "It's clobberin time!"
They continue fighting which Oscar finds is awesome and is sparring as he eggs them on.
...
"Ooooooh! This St Patricks day was so nice! Until the Irish showed up!" Marge groaned. Uh... it's their day... "Kids we're going home! Kids?"
Bart, Lisa, Hugo, Oscar and Homer got separated from her. Marge was embarrassed to see Homer joining in the fighting.
"Hmmmmmm! Maggie! Stop that!" And of course Maggie was fighting with Gerald because he was wearing orange...
"Mom we can't get to you!" Lisa called as she was stuck in the riot with Colin.
"Just find somewhere to hide! And keep your mobile phones on!" said Marge.
Colin escorted Lisa to safety.
Marge fled into town. Eventually she lost sight of the riot between green and orange Irish. As she stopped to mutter about such a lovely day had been ruined by fighting, lots of Irish orphans stole her picnic basket off of her!
"My cupcakes!" Marge whined.
"Okay, give the lady back her cupcakes you don't have the teeth for you unwanted miracles..." said an Irish man.
"We could gum the frosting!" said a toothless orphan.
"If it's good gumming your after, here's a nice cabbage..." said the Irish man. He threw a cabbage and the orphans ran after it.
"Here you go, blue haired maiden. All your cupcakes without a sprinkle or a jimmy out of place!" said the Irish man.
"Or a Jimmy rustled!" said Oscar dressed up as a gorilla carrying a box of Gorilla munch.
Marge and the Irish man face palmed.
There was a black out to commercials.
...
After the commercials Oscar had gone off somewhere.
"Thank you Mr..." Marge thanked the Irish man.
"The name's Patrick Faralley." said the Irish man.
"Well Mr Faralley. How would you like a cupcake?" Marge asked offering him one of her St Patrick's day green cupcakes with shamrocks on them.
"We would also like a cupcake!" said Yellow Weasel.
"Actually make that all of them!" said Black Weasel.
"Yeah, fork em over, lady!" said Yellow Weasel. The two bullies pulled out switchblades.
Marge screamed.
"I'll handle this! I'm Irish and I've had my fill of liquor today!" said Patrick pulling up his sleeves.
"Oh snap! An Irish man! Let's cheese it!" said Yellow Weasel. The two bullies fled.
"Thanks again, Mr Faralley." said Marge.
"Now about trying one of your cupcakes..." bit a cupcake. "Mmmmm! So moist! And such great shape retention! Ma'am I own a small bakery in town. How would you like to work for me?" said Patrick.
"Me? Marge Simpson working in a bakery? I wonder what my life would be like..." said Marge.
She imagined herself dropping her kids off at school. There were pink boxes in the car.
"What's in these boxes, Mom?" Bart asked.
"Cakes!" said Marge.
"Well, see you later Mom!" said Bart. He left for school with Lisa and Hugo.
...
"I'll do it!" said Marge. "Now to tell my husband the good news! "Homer?"
Homer was being arrested.
"I'll use my one phone call to find out what it is honey!" said Homer being put in a police car by Eddie and Lou.
"Oooooooh!" Marge groaned disappointed.
== Plot 2 ==
In court was a long line of injured people who rioted at the festival. Including the leprechaun from Treehouse of Horror XII and an orange and green painted person.
The Incredible Hulk was handcuffed and up first. No I have no idea how they subdued him.
"Hulk request change of venue! Hulk can not get fair trial in Springfield!" said Hulk.
"Agreed! Your case will be transferred..." said Judge Snyder. He sent the Hulk on his way.
Next up was Homer Simpson.
"Homer Simpson?! You are a repeat offender!" said Judge Snyder.
"Three-peat..." said Homer.
"Bail set at 25,000 dollars!" said Judged Snyder.
"Pshhhhhh! I make that in a year!" said Homer.
"You should really see you bail officer..." said Judge Snyder.
Homer went to a bail bondsman.
In side Homer was waiting in the waiting room with the Northern Irish Leprechaun. The orange one. He was badly injured with his arm in a sling and his head bandaged up.
"So what did they arrest you for?" Homer asked.
"I broke that green leprechauns teeth..." said the leprechaun while smoking a cigar.
Suddenly a Mel Gibson bail officer came with Homer's papers and explained everything.
"Okay, you check out as employed because I just called your boss and he confirmed your employment at the nuclear power plant. Then he fired you for getting arrested." said the bail officer.
"Ooooooooh!" Homer whined.
"You just need to turn up for court next week.
"And if I don't?" Homer asked slyly.
"Then you have to deal with me! Dog! I'm a bounty hunter!" said Dog the Bounty hunter.
Homer screamed.
"I bring people in who skip bail!" said Dog holding Ol Gil. "I take a tooth, make a plastic mould and return that tooth at my own expense. Basically you do not want to mess with me..."
"Wow... a Bounty hunter... what a job! And I really need a job right now!" said Homer.
"Whoa! Whoa! Easy there partner! Not just everyone can be a bounty hunter! You have to pass a special test!" said Dog. "O wait they got rid of that. But you have to pay a ten dollar entry fee... but I think you can handle that! Welcome to the field of bounty hunting fellow bounty hunter!" said Dog.
"Woohoo! I'm a bounty hunter!" Homer cheered. "When do I start hunting?"
"Whenever you turn up to the bounty hunter office and read reports of bail jumpers or anyone else with a bounty on their heads..." said Dog.
"Sweeeeeet..." said Homer.
...
Meanwhile Oscar was watching the riot die down as the authorities arrived.
Bart found him as he arrived out of breath from running.
"Oscar, what the hell are you doing! We have to get out of here!" said Bart.
"Watching the riots. Hey look! The curious bear cub is fighting for the Green Irish!" Oscar chuckled. The curious bear cub from Happy Little Elves was fighting with an orange bear cub with a big wet shiny orange nose.
Bart groaned. "Oz, grow up..." he left, not caring if Oscar followed or not.
Oscar laughed as he watched the increasingly silly characters fighting ie Hulk, Thing, the Leprechauns and a green bear cub and an orange bear cub fighting.
Bart eventually found Hugo. He was working on a gadget or science experiment device.
And together they found Lisa and Colin. Lisa called them over to an electronic store she was hiding in from the riots.
Bart and Hugo went inside. "Coooool! Look at all these electronics! Wow! A state of the art camcorder!" said Bart.
Suddenly they heard a little leprechaun muttering nonchalantly "Fiddle de Dee... plasma screen TV..."
"Quick! Hide!" Lisa pulled Bart into a hiding place.
However the leprechaun. A yupprechaun or yuppie leprechaun knew someone was there. "Oh summer in Tuscany! I know ye there! Come out now with ye hands up!" said the leprechaun yuppie.
"Please sir! We're just some lost kids hiding from the riots! We got separated from our parents!" said Lisa.
However the leprechaun was a nice leprechaun. "Oh me Jesus! Top o the morning folks! Feel free to call yer Mother and father..." said the yuppie leprechaun offering them a safe place to call Marge or Homer from.
Bart shrugged as they went in his store to shelter from the riots.
"Just don't touch my Lucky Charms cereal..." Oscar hissed.
Bart rolled his eyes.
...
Homer was at the bounty hunter meeting role call.
"Okay let's see who's here." said Dog walking around his bounty hunter meeting. "We have Boba Fett," Boba Fett. "Old timey deep sea diver bounty hunter, lizard guy I think I saw get into a fight with Captain Kirk... robot guy... Cowboy guy from Mortal Kombat 10... (he looks like a bounty hunter...) Jonah Hex... Chuck Norris... Samus Aran from Metroid... and... Eh, who are you?" He listed the bounty hunters before stopping at Raggedy Andy.
"Raggedy Andy!" said the rag doll guy.
"Get the fuck out of my bounty hunter meeting!" Dog snarled. Raggedy Andy ran off in fear.
"Now everybody I would like you to all give a warm welcome to our newest member, Homer Simpson." said Dog.
"Hi, Homer." said the bounty hunters.
The latest bail jumper they were all hunting for was Snake Jailbird. He had jumped bail for some reason.
Also everyone in Star Wars keeps putting out bounties wanting their slaves back. Jango, Greedo etc were happy to run a slave recapturing service rather than um, leaving them alone!
Elsewhere Four leaved clovers flourished this year.
Fry found an eight leaved clover. He kept it safe from his brother Yancy who wanted it like he wanted his name. Phillip.
At the Yupprechaun store.
"I once pinched Tyler Gables's hat." said Oscar.
Bart rolled his eyes.
...
Meanwhile Marge was baking in the bakery with Patrick. He tried some of her latest batch. The very pleased Mmmmmmmmm! Sounds he made suggested obviously that he liked Marge's cooking. (This is odd considering her cake in 24 Minutes was absolutely dire...)
"I'm glad you like it Patrick. But can I ask you something?" Marge asked.
"Ask away Marge." said Patrick.
"Why do you have me only make spheres, shafts and semi circles?" asked Marge.
"Well um... that's a very important question. And I will answer it- (The bell for when a customer opens the door rang) right after this customer." said Patrick. He went out the shop front.
Patty and Selma were his customers. I like how the riot/fight is completely forgotten about now...
"We were looking for something for a bachelorette party for a very naughty girl! Hehehehe..." Selma chuckles thinking suggestive thoughts.
"We need something that's tasty and tasteless... ohohoho!" said Patty being crude.
"I have just the thing right here ladies... a freshly baked ass cake..." said Patrick
Patty and Selma laughed crudely about the naughty cake.
Marge gasped in horror. Yes Marge, it's an erotic bakery...
"And what do you have in the way of a suggestive cannoli..." Patty asked.
"I have a whole book of them. Why don't you ladies amuse yourselves while I go out back..." said Patrick. However when he went back in the store room Marge furiously shut herself and him in.
"How could you not tell me you were running an erotic bakery?!" Marge furiously threw her chef hat and apron at him.
"Now Marge for as long as there's been bakeries there's been erotic bakeries..." said Patrick. "It's a legal business that harms no one..."
"Well what about...and that... and just what about's feelings?! Hmmmmmm! I got nothing..." Marge tried to argue but couldn't.
In a thinking bubble Belle from the Maison derrière appeared. "Marge if you smash up my burlesque house ever again, I won't just report you to the authorities!"
Marge growled annoyed she couldn't have the moral high ground.
"Marge all your friends and family go to Erotic bakeries... why just last week I made this for the Hibberts! It's the good Doctor's-" he was about to show her a rude cake.
"No! I don't want to see it!" Marge shied away.
"It's not what you think Marge..." said Patrick.
Marge looked at it.
"It's his penis!" said Patrick. Eeeeeew!
"That's exactly what I was thinking!" Marge yelled.
"Your husband seems to like our shop!" said a Patrick.
Marge gasped. In the front of the shop was CGI Homer from Treehouse of Horror VI.
"Oooooooh! Erotic cakes!" said CGI Homer.
...
Meanwhile Bounty hunter Homer was in the cafeteria playing with a taser while talking with Boba Fett.
"Wow these tasers are sweet! Such a great use of electrify..." said Homer. "Ooooow!" Oscar shocked him with a taser.
"Hehehehe!" They sure are..." said Oscar. He continued to zap Homer and so did Squiggy) from Helter Shelter.
"Ow! Stop that!" Homer whined. "Ow! (Cries) ahhhh!"
Meanwhile the gypsy was upset with her husband the leprechaun for embarrassing her at saint Patrick's day. "I've never been so humiliated! I just want to charge rubes to read their palms and ask to be paid in silver! Silver!" The gypsy cried.
"Ah Tata ti tata! (Irish sounding aggressive yelling)" the leprechaun yelled.
"You can be so cruel sometimes!" The gypsy cried and sobbed.
"I think that character was only good for a cameo..." said Bart.
"No he has lots of potential. I'm writing a treehouse of Horror story involving him!" said Oscar.
"Oh..." said Bart interested.
"Do you think the St Patrick's day part has run its course?" Oscar asked.
"Kinda. But you're the narrator what does it matter to me?" said Bart.
"You're damn right it doesn't matter." said Oscar. "I think I'll have a bowl of Lucky Charms..."
"You already had a bowl of Lucky Charms cereal this morning..." said Bart.
"Yeah but someone ate all the shamrock marshmallows from them!" Oscar yelled.
...
Homer went on his bounty hunter jobs. Oddly most of his targets were former arch enemies. Such as Snake.
"Dude! I was your toupee! Was it glamorous having my hair...?" Snake gloated, arriving with his son Jeremy.
"You sick bastard! You tried to make me kill my son!" Homer screeched angrily. "Which to be damn honest, I do on a daily basis because he pisses me off so much..."
Snake covered his son's ears to block out Homer's profanities.
Ned was at the leftorium. He is important to the plot somehow.
Then was Drederick Tatum. Homer just screamed in terror.
"Homer you leave me little recourse! I'm gonna have to eat your face!" said Drederick Tatum.
Homer screamed.
Then the obnoxious neighbour who moved in when Flanders was bankrupt. Homer tried to ambush him but landed painfully on his doorstep.
"I'm starting to think this is a bad idea ..." Homer groaned in pain.
And Sideshow Bob. Who eluded him in a garden center by pretending to be a palm tree. Homer was confused.
He then came back later with Bart and used him as bait. Bart was horrified Homer would do that. Sideshow Bob was taking the bait but was sneaking from the shadows.
...
Meanwhile Marge was delivering erotic cakes. At the same time Skinner invited Superintendent Chalmers for lunch again. Possibly steamed hams...
"String beans actually, narrator..." said Skinner.
Chalmers was so pleased with lunch he eagerly awaited dessert.
"Skiiiiiinnnnerr! That lunch was delightful! I am very impressed!"
"You will be pleasantly surprised sir!" said Skinner.
"I will just sit here and close my eyes until you present it to me." said Chalmers.
A pink box landed on the table and flipped open exposing a very rude cake to Chalmers. "Good lord!"
"Look away sir!" Skinner shied away from the shameful cake.
"Seymour! What's going on? I'm coming down!" said Agnes.
"Oh no! We'll have to eat it together..." said Chalmers.
== Plot 3 ==
At lunch Homer was play with his taser again. He re heated Lizard guy's coffee because it had gone cold.
"Hey!" Lizard guy yelled.
Then he tasered his own cheese croissant so the cheese melted out.
Then he stuck his taser up his nose and singed some stray nose hairs.
"Homer they didn't give us tasers to do that with them." said Ned Flanders.
"Aggggh! Ned Flanders?! Awwww! Now this job is ruined..." Homer screamed. "Why are you here?! You don't like bounty hunting..."
"He's the creepy Christian sniper guy who has a nervous breakdown and talks to himself while kissing a crucifix." said Boba Fett.
"Oh." said Homer.
"If you say so..." Ned sighed as he assembled his sniper rifle.
To Homer's annoyance, Dog partnered him up with Ned.
"I hear ya neighbours. Well in the bounty hunter business we all have to act neighbourly to one another! Ain't that right Greedo?" Dog asked Greedo.
Han Solo shot him dead with a blaster. "I shot first." said Han Solo as Greedo slumped lifelessly over the table.
Homer drove about with Ned annoyed by his company. But discovers they both like the same band. AC (thunderbolt) DC.
"Oh I like their Christian cover band AD-BC." said Ned before singing "Kindly deeds done for free!" to the tune of Dirty Deeds.
Homer joined in and they sung together.
Then they had pizza which Homer showed the proper way of eating by rolling up the slices then quickly swallowing them so they unfolded in the stomach so the flavour of the pepperoni hit you immediately.
Ned struggled as his slice kept unfolding so Homer rolled it up for him and fed it to him. Ned went "Mmmmmm!" as the pizza unfolded in his stomach. "You can really taste the pepperoni!"
Homer nodded. Then they had to go after Fat Tony for some reason.
...
At home Homer had bought Marge flowers with his pay check. But got hungry on the way home so he ate them.
"Mmmmmmm! Secret shame..." said Homer handing her bare stems.
Marge sighed.
Then he did something that meant she would have to tell him about her job at the erotic bakery.
"Marge I'm hungry! Do we have any more of those extra long twinkies with the spheres attached to them?" said Homer.
"Oh no! Homer those were for-" Marge lamented. "Homer I have something shocking to tell you. Brace yourself."
Homer inhaled und held his breath until he turned purple.
"That's not what I meant..." said Marge. Homer exhaled. "Homer I've been working at, an erotic bakery."
Homer screamed in horror.
"That is exactly why I didn't want you to know!" Marge explained.
"Look at this cake! It's boobies!" Homer screamed.
"Homer not so loud!" Marge hushed him.
"We should get a cake for Lisa's birthday party..." said Homer being weird. Marge gasped horrified and slapped him. "Ow! I was just kidding! I know how weird that suggestion is! I was making a really inappropriate joke!"
"Homer that wasn't funny. That was just sick..." said Marge.
...
In the Yupprechaun's gadget and electronics store.
"Do you still count as a grown up if I'm taller than you?" Bart asked the yuppie leprechaun.
"Yes..." said the little leprechaun polishing his glasses..
Outside the store The Hulk and The Thing made up.
"Hulk not want to fight. Hulk remember last time he fought Thing. Fighting made lady cry." said Hulk.
"Yeah isn't it just? The one thing that stops us fighting is the tears of a good woman..." said the Thing.
Oscar sighed and read a Marvel comic of The Hulk and The Thing fighting.
Homer arrived.
"Okay kids say goodbye to your funny leprechaun friend you're coming home with me. Plus I need someone to stop me from eating the bouquet of flowers for your mother. I um ate the one I bought earlier." said Homef.
"Okay! Goodbye Mr O'Flatley!" said Bart, Lisa, Oscar and Hugo as they got in Homer's pink car.
"Goodbye young'uns! Blessings of Jesus be upon you!" said the yuppie leprechaun.
"Hehehehe! Irish..." Homer giggled.
They arrived home.
"I picked up the kids honey! And here's a bunch of flowers. And I didn't eat them this time!" said Homer giving Marge some flowers. "Honestly! The kids had a real fight with me in the car to stop me sting them!"
There is a cutaway scene of the kids fighting with Homer over the flowers because he wanted to eat them. "Gimme them!"
"No Dad!"
"Gimme them!
Marge kissed him. "Oh Homie! They're beautiful!"
Homer had gifts for his kids.
He gave Bart some machine gun bullets to hammer. "Point them away from your sister!" He warned Bart sharply.
"Dad I don't like bullets or guns." Bart sighed.
"That's okay. I'll have them. My M16 is running low on ammo. These are live still Homer?" said Oscar.
"I dunno." said Homer. "And for my little scientist... a chemistry set..." Homer gave Lisa a meth lab kit.
"Dad! Is this from a meth lab?!" Lisa gasped in horror.
"Only the best meth lab in town! Nothings too good for my little girl!" Homer scruffled her hair.
"Dad this is evidence!" Lisa gasped horrified.
"Hey if you don't want it, I could always do with some more chemistry set equipment, to replace exploded beakers and test tubes from failed experiments..." said Hugo taking the meth lab equipment.
"Dad those gifts were awful! Neither of us even liked them!" said Bart.
Homer groaned.
"Homer, to be honest they were pretty awful gifts..." Marge sighed as she comforted him.
"You kids have more resentment than a confederate widow!" Homer cried then stormed off.
"Now sir! I resent that remark!" said the ghost of John Wilkes Booth.