Christmas Eve with the family ended up being one of the best we'd had in years. Between finding out about our engagement and Bobby and Celest's engagement and baby, the entire family was giddy.

Of course, the engagement discussion led to the topic of wedding planning and Casey ended up sharing her concern about her family. As I expected, the women in my family surrounded her with support. What I didn't expect was the touching offer made by Tio Ricardo.

He motioned for me to move out of my seat next to Casey at the table. Then he sat down, turned to her, and took her hand in his. "I know I can't replace your father, but if he is too stubborn to do the right thing, I would be honored to walk you down the aisle." I'm pretty sure there wasn't a dry eye in the room after his offer. Even my cousin appeared to be affected by his father's gesture.

If Casey was ever questioning where her place would be in my family, I can say with complete certainty that those concerns were erased on Christmas Eve.

When everyone finally regained control of their emotions, we all gathered up our gifts and piled into our vehicles to head to the church for midnight mass. I promised Casey that if she was uncomfortable, we could leave early. Being the warrior she was, she not only persevered through the ninety-minute service but managed to participate a little.

It was only after we left the service and were heading back to Trenton did, she admitted that she missed attending church, but was afraid of being shunned again. I assured her that would never happen with Reverend Ridgley or the priest at my family's church. Hopefully, I'd be able to talk her into coming to the next Sunday service at Rangeman.

Christmas day was long and uneventful. The core team worked a double shift along with a skeleton screw comprised of a few men who didn't celebrate Christmas or didn't go home for the holidays, Stephanie, and Casey. Bobby and I worked monitors for several hours before switching with Ranger and Tank to head into the field.

Despite not finding Maddie, Ram took off for several days and flew home to see his family. I hoped the time off would put him in a better frame of mind when he returned. Even if it did, I still planned on making sure he took a vacation when this investigation was over.

Three days after Christmas, I walked into the breakroom to grab a cup of coffee and a bagel when I ran into Hal. "When's Ram due back," Hal asked as he grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator.

"Later today," I replied. "He has tomorrow off and then he's back to work the day after.

"Is he working New Years?" Hal asked.

I nodded. "Yeah. He said since I have someone to spend New Year's with and he doesn't, he'll work the shift with a sub."

"That's nice of him," Hal replied.

"I'm not sure nice is the correct word," I said.

"You still worried about him?"

"A little. We'll see how he is when he gets back from Christmas break." I turned to head back to my office when he stopped me.

"Before you go, Kris wanted me to talk to you about the wedding."

I arched a brow. "Yours or mine?" I can't believe I had to ask that question.

He grinned. "Mine. She has this idea she wants to implement for the reception."

"And that would be?"

"She said since Ranger and Stephanie were so gracious as to allow me to propose during what was supposed to be their event, she wanted to pass on the good deed in some way."

"Well, Bobby and I already did our proposing to our women, and I don't think Manny and Stella are there yet."

Hal gave a nod. "Oh, I know all that. She was thinking more along the lines of each of you guys picking a special song to dance to with your significant other. Ranger already gave me his song."

Considering a wedding is supposed to be the bride's big day, it was extremely generous of her to share the spotlight.

"I don't need an answer from you right this minute," Hal said. "But think about it and let me know, okay?"

I nodded. "I will and tell Kris thank you."

On my way back to my office, I stopped to help Raphael with a search he was running, then covered the monitors while Brett ran to the bathroom. By the time I made it back to my desk, my mind was churning with song choices. There were so many to choose from. What one song would be the perfect representation of our situation? I tried googling songs but wasn't getting the results I wanted. So, instead, I went into my iTunes and hit play on my favorite artists. If I still couldn't come up with anything maybe I'd reach out to Zero for help. He was a musician. So, he should know some good songs.

With the music playing in the background, I got busy working on the FTA reports Cal picked up from Connie the other day. I was only about an hour into my work when a knock had me looking up. Ram stood in the doorway staring at me. "You're back," I said as I pushed up from my desk.

He nodded. "Believe it or not, but the flight actually left on time, and we had a good tailwind."

"That never happens," I said while I motioned to the chair.

He held up a hand and shook his head. "I just wanted to stop in and let you know I made it back in one piece."

"Glad to see it." I took a moment to study him. He still looked tired and maybe just a bit sad. "Was Christmas good?"

He nodded. "Everyone made it home this year."

"Your folks must have been in their glory."

"They were. I'm just glad we could make that happen for them."

Using Steph's phrase, my Spidey senses were going off. Could it be that whatever was bothering Ram had something to do with his family? "Are they okay?"

Silence met my question, and my heart broke as my partner's eyes grew glassy. I grabbed his arm and pulled him further into my office, shut the door, and motioned to the guest chair. "Sit."

This time he didn't argue and dropped down into the chair in a way that revealed all the exhaustion and pain he was feeling. I turned the other guest chair to face him, then plopped down into it. "Okay. What's going on?"

He lifted his hands to his face and pressed the heels of his hands against his eyes.

"Ram. You're one of my best friends and it hurts me to see you so out of sorts. I want to help if I can."

He moved his hands and opened his eyes as he shook his head. "There's nothing you can do. There's nothing anyone can do."

Okay, whatever it was, it couldn't possibly be that bad, could it? "Why? What's happened?"

He sighed. "My mother has cancer."

Oh shit. It was, in fact, that bad. "I'm so sorry. What do her doctors say?"

He shook his head. "Nothing good. She's been having strange and varied symptoms off and on for years, but it was a few months ago when she got sick enough, that she couldn't hide it from dad any longer. He took her to the doctor. They treated her for a few different things, but when she didn't get better, they decided to send her to a specialist."

"And what did the specialist say?" I asked. I know he probably didn't want to talk about this, but sharing would hopefully take some of the burden off his shoulders.

"She's riddled with Carcinoid Tumors," he said, and his voice cracked. "They're in her GI tract and her lungs. They found one on her liver and the beginning of one on her pancreas."

Oh hell, that wasn't good at all. "What kind of prognosis did they give her?"

He swallowed audibly and shook his head. "With as many as they've found they're calling her stage four. They said they could try chemo and radiation and maybe buy her some time, but it's not curable."

"Is she going to try the treatments?"

He shook his head again. "She said she's lived a nice long life and since she's going to die anyway, she doesn't want to go through all of the suffering and side effects of chemotherapy." He shrugged. "I can't blame her, but at the same time, I find myself angry with her for not wanting to fight."

"Damn." I reached out and grasped his forearm. "I'm so sorry. If you want to take a leave of absence so you can go home and be with her, I'll approve it right now."

He gave me a sad smile. "Thanks, but if I go back home right now, she'll kick my ass. She made it clear that she doesn't want any special treatment or any of us rearranging our lives for her. So, if it's all the same to you, I'd rather just get back to work." He pushed up to stand and I followed.

"Whatever you want to do is fine, but you do know we're all here for you, right?"

He nodded. "I do and I'm sorry I've been such an ass to you lately. Casey's a great girl and I really am happy for you."

I waved a hand in the air to dismiss his apology. "Don't worry about it. Knowing what you're dealing with, it makes sense why you've been a little touchy. Just know, if you change your mind about taking time off, it's preapproved."

"Thanks."

I pulled him to me to hug him. "You're like a brother to me," I said. "I've always got your back."

When he pulled back, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, then opened them again. "It's strange, but I do feel a little better."

"Good."

I stood in the doorway and watched him cross the control room floor and head for the stairs. I remember what it was like when I lost my dad. While it was probably harder on all of us who he left behind, at least his ending was quick. It hurt to know there wasn't anything I could do to make this better for Ram, but at least I could be there for him to lean on.

Once Ram was out of sight I returned to my desk and settled in to try and continue my work. I don't think ten minutes passed when Casey appeared in my doorway. "Hey."

"Hey," I replied and minimized the screen I had open. No need for her to see any more of the seedy side of life. "Is something wrong?"

She shook her head. "I wanted to let you know I just made a fresh pot of coffee and put out some fresh muffins."

She had my full attention with the word muffins. "What kind of muffins?"

"Cinnamon apple," she replied.

Oh yeah, I'd be getting up to grab one, but first I needed to find out what was bothering her, too. It wasn't like her to stop by my office. So, I knew something was up "Is there something else?"

"Well…I've been thinking about a couple of things."

I motioned to the same empty guest chair Ram vacated a few minutes earlier, then pushed up from my chair and rounded the desk to sit on the edge. "What's on your mind?"

"First, I wanted to let you know that I got a call from the fertility specialist's office. They had a cancellation and can get me in tomorrow morning." Well, that as some good news. Maybe she'd finally get some answers that could settle her worries.

"Do you want me to come with you?" Even before I asked the question my mind was already going over my schedule for tomorrow to see what would need to be moved or canceled.

"If you don't mind."

"Not at all. What time?"

"Ten a.m.," she replied.

"I'll drive you."

"Thank you," she said with a sigh. "I think I'll feel better having you there."

"I want to be there," I said. "What else is on your mind?"

"I've been thinking about what happened with your family on Christmas Eve and I've decided that I'm not going to write to my family."

"Okay. Why?"

"Because your mother was right when she said that family wasn't always just about blood. Plus, your Uncle was so sweet and genuine in his offer to walk me down the aisle. I just realized that I do have a new family, both here in this building and with your family. So, why put myself through more stress and possible disappointment by reaching out to people who don't want me?"

I pushed off the desk and crouched next to her. "I don't want you to think I'm trying to push you into anything you're not ready for, but, Precious, are you sure?"

She placed her hand over mine and nodded. "You, your family, and everyone here have done an amazing job of making me realize that I'm not alone anymore and I don't need people in my life who don't want me."

"If I have my way, you're never going to be alone again," I replied.

She grinned as she reached out with her other hand and cupped my cheek. "I know. I do have one request that I'm not sure is going to make your mother happy."

Uh oh. "What's that?"

"I don't want some huge, extravagant wedding with a half dozen bridesmaids and two hundred guests. Can we just keep it small? Just family and close friends?"

I grinned. She's right. Mom probably wouldn't be happy, but I was sure we could find some sort of common ground. "I'm sure we can do something like that."

"Also, I'm not catholic. So, how would that work?"

"You could convert," I replied. While I didn't follow all the practices, I knew my mother would still insist on a catholic marriage.

"What about the fact that I was married before?" she asked. "Doesn't the catholic church have some sort of rule against that?"

"You're a widow," I said. "You're free to remarry without issues."

For several seconds, she remained silent. I assumed that she was considering the new information I'd just provided. "I'd be willing to convert for you," she finally said.

"Are you sure you won't regret it later?" The last thing I wanted was for her to give up what was such an important part of her life and identity for me.

Slowly, she shook her head. "That part of my life is over. It's time to look forward."

Once again, I was so damn proud of her for rising above those who had hurt her. I leaned forward and kissed her. "After the new year, we'll have a conversation with my mother about your concerns. I'm sure we can find some sort of compromise."

"Thank you for being so supportive." She kissed me this time, then let go and stood. "I'll get back to work now."

Once she left, I went back to the break room to grab one of her amazing muffins, then returned to my office. Our conversation gave me an idea for the perfect song to request at Hal and Kris's wedding.