The Language of the Sea

by echosong258

Something in her chest aches for him, wants to reach out and wrap him in her arms, wants ease the melancholy that follows him like a shadow. But her mind does not recognize him, so she dives back into the sea and does her best to banish him from her thoughts.

30. Chapter 30

Kaia takes a couple days to sort through her thoughts and feelings. Sometimes her thoughts are sharp and clear, and she knows exactly how to prepare herself for her next venture on land. But other times it's like she's trapped in sea fog where she can't find her way and has no choice but to float until it clears or else she'll swim herself in circles, panicking as she struggles to breathe and it feels like she'll never find her way out.

Jazlee doesn't say anything. She hasn't said much lately, and Kaia can't even blame her.

But she's still curious.

But she's being a horrible friend.

And she still wants to know.

And how can she still be so, so selfish?

Or… not selfish, but… thoughtless? Maybe. Because there's a part of herself that's always gotten her into trouble, has had her jumping into situations she wasn't ready for, always ready to prove herself.

(Has it? Since when? What was she trying to prove?)

But some things can't be forced. Like when she saw the Viking and her fear outweighed her resolve to discover whatever she was trying to find. The memory makes Kaia feel like a failure. Because for so long she's been researching and looking and walking towards a goal she can't see but knows in her very being she's meant to find… yet she ran.

She gave up.

A glimmer of something catches her eye, and Kaia swims closer to find a small pendant. The moonstone is a beautiful pink and it makes Kaia's heart flutter with an unknown emotion. She gently picks up the necklace, lifting it so that the sunlight can reach it through the water.

It strikes her that she didn't give up. She just wasn't ready (her magic told her so) and now she's taking time so she can be. She's only putting her plans on hold while she continues to sort through her thoughts and feelings. Because how can she find what she needs to if she wavers in the face of it?

Kaia finds the courage to swim to the surface and talk with her friend. And it's with peace in her heart that she says, "I don't think we should come back for a while." Watching as a weight falls off Jazlee's shoulders.