Bella
I must have fallen asleep as some time later there's a cold hand shaking my shoulder. "Bella," the person hisses and I start upright.
Looking around, braced for whatever threat will be coming for me now, I see Edward crouched beside the bed. In the darkness I can't make out his features. I can make out the shape of his arm as it reaches over to switch on the light and I immediately slam my eyes shut, blocking out the light.
"Sorry," he says as I slit my eyes open, squinting to keep the bright light out of my face.
It takes several seconds of blinking for my vision, and mind, to clear.
"You're alright!" I shriek throwing myself out him. The events from the day come flooding back to me. "I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry."
He doesn't reply, instead just rubbing small circles on my back for a while.
"Please, say something," I say, becoming uncomfortable with the awkward silence.
"I don't really know what you want me to say."
Worried by his strange tone, I look up into his face and can't read what I see. It's the same blank mask he'd used that day in the woods that he left me. He must hear my rising heartbeat as his face softens.
"I thought I'd lost you. I didn't know what was happening when you tore off after the wolves. Don't do that again."
"ME!" he exclaims, taking great control to keep from waking Charlie who I can hear snoring in the room next door. "When will you realise that I'm not in any danger. You however…" He rubs his face with his hand, a sign I've come to realise is stress induced. "You are in danger. And even more danger when you go making these stupid plans that put you in the firing line."
"It wasn't like that," I say rather lamely.
"Don't insult me," he pulls back from me, leaving me sitting alone on the bed. "I've heard the whole plan and, even if you were just some random human, it would have been a stupid plan. I'd have thought, after everything, James, the Volturi, you'd have realised just how dangerous our kind are."
I open my mouth to defend myself, but he cuts me off.
"We've been doing everything we can to keep you safe. To keep everyone safe. We can't do that if you're running off and plotting schemes behind our backs!"
He sits down in the armchair heavily enough to cause the joins to squeak in protest.
"I'm not sure I can do this anymore."
The chasm in my chest rips itself wide open.
"The panic I felt when I realised… I can't be worried for you like that anymore. If one time it wasn't… I don't know what I'd do. I can't lose you Bella."
"So," I splutter between gasps. "What are you…. I mean… What do you…" I can't collate my words enough to speak full sentences. The world starts to feel as though it's spinning faster than it should be.
"No," Edward is quick to reassure moving faster than I can process to crouch back in front of me. "I don't mean that. Please, I'm sorry for worrying you." No matter what he says, I can tell from everything that's happened that he's going to leave again. If he leaves, Charlie will force me to leave too and then I'll never have a chance of being found again. I'll be all on my own.
"I'll do better," I splutter.
He chuckles softly which feels inappropriate for the situation, "I'm glad to hear it, but I promise, I'm not leaving. I want to ask your permission for something." Shifting his position so that he's on one knee, he says, "I want to spend the rest of always with you. Will join me in eternity?"
Confused by his words and still trying to calm my emotions, I just blink at him.
As the time passes, he becomes steadily more restless until I have to say something.
"I've already asked you to change me," I say, letting the confusion roll into my voice.
"I'm not asking for some day. I'm asking for soon."
That shocks me back to reality and, without thinking of how it might be perceived, I flinch away from him. "You're just saying that. No. You don't mean it. You don't want me. This is a joke."
"It is not a joke. We need to clear a few things up first, but as soon as everything is sorted, I want to you to join me."
"Yes!" I say, "But why the sudden change. Why everything? Why wait?"
"I don't want to lose you, and in the short time I've been with you, you've been at risk from my kind more times than I'd like. I'll admit, that with the threats increasing, I no longer feel confident in our ability to keep you safe." He runs a finger down the side of my face in a reassuring way. "It wouldn't be safe for any of us to have a new-born around during a battle, and I don't think Charlie is just going to accept you disappearing, not with what he now knows and suspects."
"I'm coming back to Charlie, but what do you mean by battle?" My panic and alarm rising again. "No one is going to battle, no one is fighting."
"We might have to." His face twists up in a way that tells me that he had been planning to keep this information from me.
"Just tell me," I say, "I know I've not really shown to be sensible with information, but I want to know."
"You have a right to know, but only if you promise to listen to us, or at least tell us, before going off on your own plan. And note, I do not include the pack in us." I nod my head. "The disappearances recently, they're Victoria. We think she's been creating an army of vampires. If someone doesn't act soon, the Volturi will get involved and that means them coming back here to see that you're still human. While Charlie is so suspicious, you can't go missing. I don't think he'll even believe a sudden death. It's not safe to change you before they come, and it's not safe for them to come while you're still human."
"Why does it need to end in a fight?"
"These new vampires are strong, stronger than us because their human blood still lingers in their system. You don't create so many at once unless you are planning for war. It's coming, and the chances are it's coming for us."
"So, what are we going to do?"
"It's being discussed right now. I won't know until I get home."
"You didn't want to have your say?" I ask, surprised by his decision.
"I've said all that matters – you are to be kept as far away as possible. Besides, I wanted to make sure you are safe."
He shifts to sit next to me on the bed, wrapping one arm around my shoulder.
"Do you have any other questions?" I shake my head. "Then I need to ask you something."
"Go ahead," I say, apprehensive as to what the question will be.
"Why were you so prepared to throw away your life."
"I wasn't," I blurt, trying to deny the real danger I could have been in.
"Please, don't lie to me, not about this. I'm not mad, I just… I want to understand."
"I don't even know what to tell you. Can we just, not talk about this right now? I know it was a mistake, but I need to get my head around it before I can even think about explaining it to someone else."
Edward casts his eyes downwards, "I'm sorry you're facing so much because of what I've done."
"Forget about everything else for tonight, I want some us time."
I stumble to my feet and head to get changed. When I come back in, I grab my laptop and set it on the bed while I climb under the covers. Patting the top to indicate that Edward should join me, I fire up the computer.
"What do you wanna watch?" I ask loading up the online video service that Emmett had signed me up to what feels like a life time ago.
"Shouldn't you be going to sleep?" he asks sceptically.
"Nah, I had a nap. Choose quick or I'll put a chick flic on." He smiles at my teasing and takes the laptop out of my lap. It only takes him a few seconds to find one of the films he'd been telling me about the other day.
I snuggle down into his side, keeping the quilt between us to protect me from his cool temperature. As always when at Charlie's at night, he passes me both headphone buds, the low sound no problem for his sensitive hearing.
The film is interesting, though, despite my earlier assurances that I didn't need sleep, around half way through I did drift off. Edward, being his usual self, manages to remove all the devices without waking me and then spends the rest of the night sitting on the rocking chair in the corner.
When I wake up, I'm disappointed to see that he's gone from beside me. Stretching my arms up to try and release some of the tension that had started overnight, he smirks me.
"I'll miss your dishevelled morning look."
"Be carful mister or I'll have to go searching through the archives for a sleeping Edward photo." I throw the spare pillow over towards him then flop back against mine. "What time is it?"
"Just after ten. Charlie left a while ago. He's left a note on the table for you."
"What does it say?"
"I've not read it." I send him a disapproving glance and he smiles. "Fine, he told you to stay home and he'll be back at lunch to check up on you. But I didn't read it."
"Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well I'm certainly not staying here. I want to know what's happening. Have you heard from anyone yet?"
"Only Alice who says Esme is making breakfast for you."
I groan, "All seeing pixie. At least it means the wolves aren't around."
Throwing the covers off in a sudden moment of bravery, I shiver as the cool air touches my skin. Chattering my teeth dramatically, I head to the bathroom to throw on some warm clothes and then follow Edward out to the car.
It doesn't take long to reach the Cullen's house, and the whole time I'm silently praying that we won't see Charlie out patrolling on our way there. Not that I should really be worried about it given that Edward is driving, but keeping a low profile will help.
Everyone is in the living room when we arrive, but I walk straight past them, following my nose to the small mountain of pancakes that Esme had been preparing. Looking at it, my mouth falls open. "I can't eat all those…" I mutter.
"Just grab a couple and come in," Emmett shouts from the other room. "And bring one for me too!"
Confused by his request, I grab two plates out of the cupboard and put a single pancake on each one. Also following my nose, I find a pot of warm coffee and quickly pour myself a mug.
I pass the plate over to Emmett and then sit down next to Edward. I can't help feeling a little self conscious that I'm the only person eating, but that embarrassment quickly disappears when Emmett take a large bite out of the pancake.
"What the hell?!" Rosalie says as his spits the partially chewed food all over the floor. "What were you expecting?"
"I dunno, thought I'd see. Sure it smells horrible, but then lots of things seem disgusting but taste great. I remember goats cheese smelling horrific but still tasting good."
"No, idiot, that was designed for the species. Just don't – What the hell?! Why would you try more?"
"Might have changed?" He says shrugging and looking sheepish.
Everyone starts tearing into Emmett for keeping on trying the food, and then shadowing him as he cleans up and makes a terrible job of it. As funny as I find it, I can tell it's not something he'd usually do, but it's successfully taken the attention off of me while I nibble on my own pancake.
He ends the charade just as I'm passing my plate to Edward to put on the side table and taking the steaming mug of coffee bliss.
"Want some of this too?" I joke gesturing the mug over to him. His face instantly turns a slight shade of green, and without warning, he dashes off to the sink to dry wretch. The entire group laughs at him.
"Well," Says Jasper who's I'm pleased to see is no longer sounding quite so cold, "We've got stuff to do, if you're finished Emmett?"
"Yes, sir!" he says mock saluting.
Jasper sends him an uncharacteristic glare and then starts explaining the plan of action.
"I've got Jenks on the case searching. If she's keeping Billy alive, then she'll be needing certain supplies, Jacob said he's insulin dependant. If there's a trail, he'll find it. When we have a rough location, we can start moving over. The wolves have expressed a desire to help. At the moment, they'll just be a hinderance given their lack of experience fighting, but we're meeting later to see if we can sharpen them up enough to not get killed."
He spends the next few minutes talking through various options of what we will then do depending on the location. As he's sending everyone off, he gestures for Edward and I to wait behind.
"Neither of you should be involved. I don't care where you are, just make sure it's far away from where we are risking our lives."
Edward is instantly on his feet squaring up to Jasper, "Say it again?"
"It's true. You'll be no help with her waiting in the wings and I don't trust Bella to stay put. Don't like it, come up with something that's going to guarantee that you won't be a hinderance, and I'll entertain it. If not, just keep out of the way."
I place a gentle hand on Edward's shoulder. "I want you to stay with me anyway," I admit, concerned about him fighting.
"See, good shout Bella." And then he's disappeared off somewhere in the house.
"I'm sorry Edward," I say, knowing that Jaspers words would have hurt his pride.
"It's fine," he grumbles through gritted teeth. "We need to get back before Charlie realises you've gone."