A/N Thanks to my beta, meteorstorm! I've been sitting on this one for a minute. It's complete and will be four chapters. I'll likely post the next chapter on Wednesday! Happy reading!

Colin pulled an object out of a box in his attic. He didn't know what it was. His hand swiped across the top to remove the layer of dust currently on it. What happened next changed the course of his life forever.

"Hello! My name is Penelope. Congratulations on your genie selection! There are three rules," Penelope started.

"Whoa! Hold on a minute. What in the world is happening right now?" A man butted in.

Penelope rolled her eyes. Two hundred years and she's never gotten the chance to get through it all without an interruption. "You rubbed the lamp, yes?"

"Is that what this is?" He held out the lamp cautiously as if it would bite him.

Penelope's gaze flickered to her home. Oh, how she despised it. Best not to let him know that. "Yes, sir. Now, may I finish the rules?"

"Um, I guess. Can I ask questions afterward?"

"Yes, fine. Now, shush!" Penelope eyed him as if daring him to interrupt again.

He mimed a zipper sliding across his lips. Great, a jokester, what was her luck?

"Rule one: you may not wish for someone to die or return to life. Rule two: you may not wish for someone to fall in or out of love. Rule three: each wish must begin with the phrase 'Penelope, I wish.' As a wisher, you are granted three wishes. A word to the wise, don't try to free the genie. I don't recommend it."

"Is that what happened to you?" he asked.

"Yes, of course." Penelope rolled her eyes. A real winner this one was. "Why else would I warn you?"

"I'm not sure, actually. Don't you want to be free?"

Penelope laughed. "Are you kidding? I'm all-powerful. I can't die. I can do anything I want."

His brow furrowed. "But, aren't you chained to the role? I mean you have to obey my every wish."

"Whoa - hang on. It's not your every wish. It's only the first three. I literally just said that. Once I grant you the three you're owed, I'm off." She hummed. "This will take you, what - a week? Then the lamp will reappear in another part of the world. I get so much travel and PTO. This is the best job I've ever had."

"When are you from?" He dropped down into a seat directly on the floor.

Penelope looked around. They were in a dusty, dark, and densely packed room. She debated sitting on the ground, too. But she didn't want to encourage him. "Where are we?" Best to answer a question with a question.

"My attic. Come on, you can answer my question. When are you from?" He coaxed.

"I wouldn't want to break your poor mortal brain," Penelope deadpanned.

"That's funny. Are most genies funny?" He was endearing, in the most dangerous way. This man probably got away with everything. "I can take it. Just tell me, please."

"Ugh, fine. The 1800s. But the lamp tends to skip around every six years if it hasn't been found. I've been able to keep up with the world in all that time - to an extent." Penelope let her eyes linger on the bookshelf in the back of the room. "It can be petty, you know?"

"The world? Sounds like something my mortal brain wouldn't comprehend," he joked.

Penelope ignored him.

He shook his head. "Okay, fine. How long do I have to think of and use my wishes?"

"There's no time limit. Take however long you need." Penelope gave in and sat on the floor in front of him.

"What if I die before I complete all three wishes?" he asked.

"Then you die and the lamp regenerates somewhere new." Penelope fought not to cringe. She often tried to give her wishers a painless death if it happened while she was granting wishes. Thankfully, it didn't happen often.

"I have a million more questions," he admitted.

Penelope sighed. "And, to think, I don't even know your name and now you want to ask me a million questions."

"Oh! Colin! I'm Colin Bridgerton. It's nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too, Colin. Alright, let's get into this." Penelope straightened her back and prepared for a new wisher's insane amount of questions.

Colin's questions were as expected. He wanted to know the limitations (very few); could other people see her (yes); how could she integrate into his life (she'd been using the personal assistant excuse lately); where would she sleep (she stayed in the lamp), could she eat with him (yes); how did she become a genie (nice try, Colin).

With that last question, Penelope cut in. "Now, thought of any wishes, yet?"

"Not really?" he said. "But I do have more questions."

"We'll get back to them. What about wishing for fortune?"

"I already have that," he said.

"Fame?"

"It came with the fortune," he admitted with a crooked smile.

"A big family?"

"I have seven siblings." He seemed almost sheepish at having to shoot her down.

"Are you kidding me right now?" Penelope seemed frustrated. "What do you want?!"

"At this very moment?" He patted his chin.

Penelope nodded, eying him cautiously.

"A banana," he finally said.

"I could easily grant that." Penelope spun her hands together and a banana appeared in her hand.

"Hey, thanks!" Colin reached out for it, but it popped out of existence.

"You didn't wish for it. But that's easily fixed."

"Nah, I'm not going to waste a wish on that." He stood and held out a hand to pull her up.

She took it, letting him pull her to her feet.

"We have some downstairs." He headed toward the door of the attic. "Come on, you can have one too."

Penelope let out another sigh and braced for more questions downstairs. It was going to be one of those types of wish cases. They always took longer than normal. But what is a little extra time compared to the life of an immortal?

One of the four walls around her heart crashed down.