Chapter 1- Sanctuary

A/N: This story is still set in my Dillon AU, but it takes us back in time to when Kitty returns home after her ordeal with Jude Bonner.

Matt held up his arms to assist his beloved Kitty from their buggy once they'd come to a halt in front of their house on the Triple D ranch. The battered and bruised redhead emotionlessly stared at the house that they'd called home for the last three and a half years.

Adelaide and Matthew, Junior eagerly awaited their mother's return after a mostly unexplained two-week absence. The nearly four-year-old girl and recently turned two-year-old boy had been informed that their precious mama had been in an accident and she needed to heal before she'd be able to come home. What else could their daddy have told them after she'd been taken, raped, and shot in cold blood by Jude Bonner and his infamous Dog Soldiers?

"Honey," Matt softly remarked, noticing his wife hesitation, "I want to get ya inside before you catch a chill."

Kitty studied her folded hands, "I'm nervous, Matt," she whispered.

The big man lowered his arms and placed his hands tenderly atop his wife's. He sighed, "Oh, Sweetheart, you don't need to be nervous. The children have been asking to see you every day for the last two weeks and they're so excited you're coming home today."

Kitty couldn't meet her husband's gaze as she fought to keep her tears from falling. She swallowed hard, muttering, "What if I seem…different?"

"What do you mean, Honey?" Matt gently tucked the long, red tresses that had been veiling her slightly bruised face behind her ear.

The anxious mother slowly turned to meet her husband's warm baby blues. She breathed, "What if I seem different to them? Is it possible they'll know something horrible happened to me?"

The cool, late September breeze caused Kitty to shudder as she waited for her big, strong cowboy to reply.

"I told them you had an accident. That'll explain the bruises to them. But, Kitty," he tenderly placed the palm of his hand upon her cheek, careful to avoid the healing burn, "Addie is nearly four and Matthew just turned two. Once they see you, all they'll care about is that their mama is back home. They need you every bit as much as I do."

Kitty wiped away her tears with the back of her hand, nodding in the affirmative. She offered her husband a half grin before standing and allowing him to gently grasp her by the waist and softly place her on the ground.

"Shall we?" Matt offered her his boyish grin while he held out his arm for her to steady herself.

"I'm ready," Kitty firmly stated, digging deep within herself to hold her head up high as she straightened her spine.

They hadn't been two feet into the house before their two redheaded children sprinted to greet them, shouting, "Mama's home!"

Matt quickly placed himself in between his wife and children, cautiously warning, "Hey there, ranch hands! We need t' be careful around Mama. Remember, I told you she's gonna be a little sore for a while."

Kitty untied the top of her cape, a genuine smile covering her face, "Let them by, Matt. Please. I'll be fine."

The marshal of Dodge City stepped aside, allowing his children the chance to cling to their mother's legs through her black skirt and petticoats.

"Oh, Mama! I missed you," Addie cried, her smile so wide it made her large blue eyes practically disappear.

"Mama home," little Matty garbled in his best toddler-speak.

Tears slid down Kitty's slightly bruised cheeks as she did her best to bend over and rub her children's backs, wincing as she did so.

"Ouch," she quietly hissed, reflexively touching her back where Doc had removed Bonner's bullet.

"Here, Honey," Matt appeared at his wife's side, slowly guiding her into the sitting room, grabbing Matty's little hand, "Let me take your cape and then the children can sit next to you on the settee."

The big man stood behind his frail woman and slipped the cape off her shoulders. He tossed it over his forearm and gently eased her onto the sofa. "There ya go," he grinned, "Okay, Addie, Matthew, sit on either side of Mama," he hoisted Matthew onto one side of Kitty as Addie snuggled into Kitty on the opposite side.

"There we are," Kitty quietly commented, wrapping her arms around her children, "This is just what Mama needed."

Festus silently watched from the kitchen, his heart breaking at the sight of his sweet Miss Kitty enduring pain just to embrace her little ones.

"Miz Kitty," he finally spoke as he tentatively entered the sitting room, "Kin I git ya somethin'? Some coffee maybe? Some vittles?"

"Hello, Festus," the redhead grinned, "I'd get up t' hug you, but…" she nodded her head at each child nuzzled up next to her.

"Thayre's plenty a time fer huggin' later, Mum. Is that a 'yes' fer some coffee?" he was doing his best to act naturally; to act as if he hadn't noticed her fading bruises or just how hollow her cheeks had become.

"Water would be wonderful. And Festus?"

The hillman turned back to face her, as he'd already started to race for her beverage of choice, "Yes'm?"

"I wanna thank you for looking after the children while I was," she briefly looked away, licking her bottom lip, "recovering."

Festus stood to his full height, straightening the sides of his vest, "Yer most welcome, Miz Kitty. T'was m' pleasure. Why, these two young 'uns are the best thang t' ever happen t' us. You know that."

"They most certainly are," the emotional woman confirmed, barely able to see through her misty haze.

"Mama, boo-boo," Matthew gently caressed his mother's chin, closely inspecting her yellowing cheek.

"Yes, Baby. Mama has a lot of boo-boos. I had a terrible accident," she convincingly explained, "But before you know it, I'll be as good as new." On the outside, anyway.

"Do your boo-boos hurt, Mama?" Addie asked, scrunching her freckled, button nose.

"A little. I just can't pick you children up for a couple of more weeks is all," Kitty kissed her daughter's forehead as she stroked the length of her hair.

Festus delivered Kitty a glass of water, "I'll just put 'er right here. Need anythin' else?"

"No, I don't think so," she grinned, still embracing her little ones.

"Wael, I'm gonna git on outside an' feed the animals. Matthew tell ya he bought a few new horses t' join the chickens, cow, an' goat?"

"Yes, he most certainly did."

Festus stood in front of the bravest woman he'd ever known, subconsciously wringing his hands. He whispered, "I'm so glad yer back. Dodge City never woulda been the same. We never," he gulped, "woulda been the same."

XXXXXXXX

"Matt," Kitty called from the water closet, "Can you please help-"

Before she could even finish, her husband appeared in the doorway, his large frame nearly filling the entire space. He tried to be nonchalant, "Whadd'ya need, Honey?"

"I thought I'd be able t' get myself outta the bath, but I just can't do it on my own," she grimaced as she shifted in the lukewarm water.

Matt grabbed the large bath towel from the wall peg and flipped it over his shoulder. He bent down, gingerly tucking his arms under Kitty's armpits. He whispered in her ear, "I'm gonna lift you so you'll be on your feet before I help you out of the tub, okay?"

She silently nodded, biting her bottom lip as she secured her arms tightly around her husband's neck.

The giant of a man felt his insides quake as he spied the healing bruises up and down his wife's back. I shoulda killed that animal when I had the chance.

"Want me to help you dry off?" Matt innocently asked once he'd had Kitty safely out of the cooling bath water.

The redhead quickly wrapped the towel around herself, distractedly mumbling, "No, thank you, Matt. I can do the rest myself."

"You're sure now?"

"Positive," she half-grinned, lifting her ginger brows as she nodded.

"Okay, then. Call me if you need help," he offered over his shoulder while exiting the humid room.

Kitty began to dry herself off, suddenly feeling trepidatious about sleeping in the same bed as her husband. While at Doc's, she hadn't been able to wait to sleep in her own bed, embraced by the love of her life. Now, suddenly she felt like a young, virgin bride on her wedding night. Oh, she'd known that Matt wouldn't expect anything from her for quite some time, as per the instructions from Doc. Kitty more or less worried that she wouldn't be able to handle anyone being that close in proximity to her.

Upon dropping her damp towel to the floor, Kitty spied herself in the full-length looking glass that leaned against the wall. She walked toward her reflection, unable to believe that the person looking back at her was actually herself. She took in the appearance of her naked form, taking inventory of all the bruises and cuts in various stages of healing. She delicately touched her fingertips to the side of one of her breasts, where Bonner had bit her so hard that she'd bled. She turned to the side, running her hand over her now flat stomach, noticing that she'd lost several pounds due to her depression.

"You really did it t' yourself this time, didn't ya, Russell?" Kitty barely spoke above a whisper.

"Honey? Did you call for me?" Matt asked from the other side of the door.

Is his ear against the door? "No," she weakly replied, pulling a clean, crisp, white long-sleeved nightgown over her head. She entered the bedroom replying, "I'm fine."

Kitty grimaced, holding onto her side as she sat at her vanity, desperately not wanting to look at her reflection again in the looking glass. She tightly closed her eyes while she detangled her hair, in an attempt to gather her strength in order to casually join her husband in their big brass bed. The same bed that had always been a sanctuary of sorts for the couple. The same bed where the marshal and saloon keeper had discussed everything, from the price of sugar to how to discipline their children. The same bed where they had made love for the last eighteen years.

The apprehensive redhead released a slow breath, opening her big blue eyes. She turned her head slightly to the right to closely examine the healing burn upon her left cheek. For the life of her, Kitty couldn't remember which Dog Soldier had decided to brand her with the tip of his cigar. Doc had told her it was her brain's way of coping with the attack and that it was completely normal for victims to block out certain facts relating to their abuse.

Victim. How I hate that word. Will the people of Dodge City see me as a victim for the rest of my life? she pondered.

Kitty gazed into the looking glass, noticing Matt staring at her from where he was sitting on the bed. Her somber eyes met his devoted expression through the reflection.

"You ready for bed? I can help you if you need me to," Matt offered, swinging his legs off the bed and planting his feet on the floor.

"I can do it myself, Matt. I'm not an invalid for goodness sake," Kitty spat, harsher than she'd intended.

"I didn't think you were," the gentle giant stated kindly, tucking his legs back under the covers. He picked up the newspaper from his side table, pretending to peruse it as he watched his beloved out of the corner of his eye.

She threw back the covers on her side of the bed and carefully lowered her aching body onto the mattress, hissing through her clenched teeth.

"Did you take some of the powders Doc gave you for the pain, Honey?"

"No," Kitty quietly answered as she adjusted herself to lay on her side, keeping her back to her husband, "I want to be able to hear the children if they need me."

Matt turned down the lamp and laid flat upon his back. He interlocked his fingers behind his head, allowing his elbows to stretch out across his pillow as he sweetly offered, "Well, if you change your mind, you can just wake me and I'll get the medicine for you."

"Thank you, Matt."

"You're welcome," he turned onto his side, facing his wife's back, "I love you, Kitty. I'm so happy and relieved you're home." I want to wrap my arms around you so desperately right now…

Barely audibly, the words, "Me, too," drifted into the darkness.

TBC

A/N2: As some of you avid FF readers may be aware, the FF site no longer provides emails of any kind, nor statistics of how many readers we have. An author's only gauge as to how she/he is doing is reviews, so if you feel so inclined, please leave an encouraging note. As always, thank you for your readership and support.