Shinji Matou had trouble remembering what had happened.

Ever since Sakura Matou relinquished control of the Rider Class Servant to him and he had entered the Holy Grail War, everything blurred together. It was a maelstrom-like rollercoaster of events.

Shirou Emiya, a boy he once thought of as a friend, had turned against him and threatened to kill him without remorse.

Rin Tohsaka, a girl who shared his fate of being born into a Magus lineage, had shown her true colors and attempted to kill him while looking down on him.

Illyasviel von Einzbern, Kirei Kotomine, and all the Servants, everyone involved acted as if he was a background piece in a play.

It infuriated him.

Shinji should have been special. He was a Matou, his family was special, and yet he wasn't.

He was defective.

A failure of a Magus, unable to even channel Magical Energy through his body.

Even as a failure, he still studied the books about Magecraft in his family's library endlessly.

And it all amounted to nothing.

Any sort of alchemical concoction he made would be subpar to an over the counter drug.

The only time his knowledge had any effect on the world was when he was made to draw the Servant summoning circle for his adoptive sister.

Even his final moments were a blur. His emotions and thoughts were lost on him, and he could only recall that he had been near Shirou Emiya and Rin Tohsaka when he had died.

An unfamiliar warmth was flowing through his blood,

Had he been poisoned? It would explain why his mind and body felt weak and unstable.

He struggled to even open his eyes, and when he did a bright light blinded him.

Blinking rapidly didn't help much, but it didn't take long for his eyesight to adjust a bit.

With blurry vision, he saw blonde hair.

"Aa!" He wanted to scream and jump back, but he couldn't move, his body was unresponsive.

And as his vision cleared up, he was relieved to find that it wasn't Emiya's Saber staring down at him.

"Waa?" He wanted to ask the lady looking down at him what had happened, but his lips, teeth and tongue were still sluggish.

'Well, I don't expect a random lady to know exactly what was happening, but maybe she saw something of note.'

"Xxxxxx, xx'x x xxx." A man spoke up in a foreign language, and then bent over above him.

'What language is that? Even if I'm not fluent in them, I'm still familiar enough with most widely used languages.'

"Xxx xxxxx."

'Seriously, if you're speaking to an injured person, you should have enough awareness to speak in their native language.'

He attempted to sit up, it had become clear to him that these foreigners wouldn't be any help in his current state. However his body still wouldn't obey him.

The responses and feedback he was receiving from his nerves were somehow wrong.

Either he had been horribly deformed, or he was suffering from a serious head injury.

"Wa—wa!" Again he tried to ask what was happening, if he could just hear his own voice, he'd be able to relax. "Wa…"

Further attempts to communicate ended when his eyes had adjusted enough that he could see the entire room with clarity.

He was in a room with walls and a roof made from wood.

"Xxxx, xxx xx." A female voice also spoke up, and then a redhead reached her hands below his range of vision.

"Ah!" He involuntarily let out a yelp as his body was lifted up.

"Xxxxxx, xxxxx xxxxx." The redhead had a gentle tone as she gently cradled him in her arms.

Although he couldn't understand her words, he could comprehend her intentions.

She was trying to calm him down.

A reflexive urge to defy this stranger died the moment it was born.

Surrounded by warmth, something in his brain began to shut down.

…

…

'What's happening? Did that Enizbern brat do something to me?'

No matter how much he tried, he couldn't recall the last concrete moment of his life.

Anyhow, he was now an infant.

He had fits of falling asleep and then waking up with yelp as he recalled his close encounters with death.

'Damn, damn! What happened? I was so close to winning! How did this happen to me?'

Whenever he was woken up by fear or rage, a redheaded woman in a maid dress would be nearby and ready to lull him back to sleep.

The blonde haired woman and brown haired man would occasionally stop by when he was awake and coo towards him.

'Stop looking at me like that! I'm not a baby!'

"Awa uaha!" His weak arms and legs would flail whenever he struggled to speak.

Regardless of how hard he tried, his infant body was incapable of speech.

And anything that he did just resulted in him tiring out his body to the point of passing out.

Eventually, his inability to speak and move, combined with his growing humiliation of breastfeeding and soiling himself, led him to silently crying at night.

The redhead maid was always there, and she always noticed. She would gently lift him up and then whisper what was probably a lullaby song until he calmed down or fainted.

His fits only further fueled his humiliation.

'It's because my brain is that of an infant's. That's why I'm not behaving like I normally would.'

…

…

Something was wrong.

He had woken up in the middle of the night with pain in his chest, his lungs and heart were aching.

His blood felt thick and hot, like magma, in his veins and brain.

Against his will, he began crying intensely.

The maid placed a freezing hand against his burning hot forehead, and then she ran out the room.

'N-no, d-don't leave me.'

For some reason, being left alone he made his pain nearly double.

The blonde woman bursted into the room, the brown haired man was a step behind, and the maid followed right after.

"Xxxx!" The blonde shouted, and she placed her hand on his forehead, closed her eyes and then she began speaking in a measured tone. "Xxx xxx xxxxx xx xxx xx xxxxxxxxx xxxx x xxxxxxxxx xxxx, xxx xxxxxxxx xxxx xxxxx xxx xxxx xxxx xxx xxxxxxxx xx xxxxx xxxx xxxx, XXXXXXX!"

A green glow was emitted from her palm, and a wave of energy traversed throughout his body.

'——'

He couldn't form thoughts, a wave of indescribable pain exploded from deep within his soul, and then he blacked out.

…

…

When he next awoke, he noticed a few things.

For one, he had been moved to the room of the couple, and they seemed to have lost a portion of their initial excitement of giving birth. They were acting a tad more seriously when they interacted with him.

He would've preferred to be left alone with the maid. She didn't look at him with a clouded gaze, and she didn't pointlessly degrade herself with silly faces.

Anyway, none of that was actually important. He could've been left with a pack of wolves for all he cared for his living quarters.

After being woken up from pain, and then seemingly being healed, he had been made aware of something within his body.

It had actually been something he had first noticed and then dismissed as poison.

Something warm was flowing alongside his blood.

It was some sort of magical power.

He had ignored it, and as a result it had accumulated inside his body, until it was on the verge of bursting out.

And that wasn't all. When he was healed, it did more than simply helping his body, it reached down to his soul and corrected a defect.

In other words, his Magical Circuits were repaired and the overflowing energy was redirected into them which forced them open.

He had felt them bursting open and tearing under the pressure, but he must've been healed again, because they were fixed when he woke up again.

'I… My… Hahaha! Finally! I have them, I have them! Proof of my power! With these I'll finally…. finally…'

Like a truck, or a sword made from a pillar, or an arrow which shredded space, the realization tore apart his lifelong dream.

He wasn't a Matou anymore. He didn't have his family lineage to uphold. He had died and couldn't surpass Sakura, couldn't prove his father wrong, couldn't demonstrate to his grandfather why he deserved to be the successor.

He had been reborn.

And unless he was mistaken, the signs pointed towards it being in a parallel world.

Reincarnated.

He had been given a new life. One free from everything his old life had been chained to.

'No wait, the blonde had used magecraft, and I'm pretty sure she's my mother. So I suppose it's hereditary here too, then I guess I'll strive to be the best and not be replaced in this life.'

A second chance.

One where he wouldn't repeat the mistakes of his old life.

He'd become a true and proper Magus.

AN: This story was sort of brain-worm that wouldn't leave me alone.

The reason he has magical circuits is because his soul is the same as his previous life, and his Magus constitution caused the Mana in his body to be stuck inside.

I'll probably make Shinji explain his own interpretation later, but I wanted the audience to be informed about what really happened.

I know Shinji was and is a terrible person, however, I really felt his character would fit in this world nicely. Or at least I think it'll be a interesting story.

I've recently read a Nasu interview, and it really gave me something to think about in regards to Shinji. So I hope to be able to explore my thoughts about his character in a fun story.