Ta dah, enjoy!

ROBYN POV

In the end, we were still early to our watch. Even so, I couldn't shift the blush from my cheeks. Not only was I thrilled at the fact we had managed that level of intimacy, my body was still reeling from his… attentions. No one knew my body like Levi. And as we headed into the living room area downstairs, and I made for the kitchen, one lingering look from him had that colour rising in my cheeks again. It had me thinking about his hands on me. About my hands on him. About his voice, barely bitten back in time. My own voice choked and thready as I wanted to moan and scream in joy. Not only was it a new step for us getting back to where we were, it lifted a huge weight from my bones. No, it wasn't the full shebang. And no, I wasn't assuming everything would be fine with that. But I was still taking it as a win. The touch, the intimacy, the love, it had overruled the shadows. At least for now. And with that in mind, I would hope. I would look ahead and feel less apprehension about doing that with him again. Who knows… Maybe I would be lucky. Maybe I wouldn't have to revisit that nightmarish moment ever again… Maybe.

The kettle whined.

The previous watch, Connie and Mikasa, headed up to their bunks. They hadn't said anything obviously, but I couldn't ignore the little looks Mikasa was giving. Had she heard something? Or was she simply checking for any sign of an unheard struggle? Perhaps both. I focused on brewing the tea, and by the time Levi had come back inside from his perimeter check, there were two brewed cups steaming on the kitchen table, and I had my gear on.

He took the tea with a small thanks and set up by the front window, perching on the sill, keen eyes scanning the street. The line of his jaw would flex a little with each sip, the apple of his throat bobbing, the nearby muscle occasionally flexing as he turned his head. Every detail, so clear to me, so minute and yet things that I had ached without. Tiny gestures that meant nothing in the grand scheme, but when I had been robbed of them, hurt more than any bruise in training.

I took my perch on the other end of the room, by the back wall of the small house, checking the rear for any sign of movement. But there was nothing. The Underground would only be just starting to wake up, the first flickers of dawn peering through the sunwells. Even so, we had to be ready.

"Think we'll see Kenny today?" I sipped my tea, keeping my gaze focused on the back gate and walls by the communal well between houses.

"Might do. Word must have reached him by now, it's been hours. But I guess it depends on how tight a leash the White Cloaks have him on or not, or if that leash is holding him back or dragging him closer." Levi sighed. "They must have something big on him."

"How'd you figure?"

"To order Kenny around is one thing, and unlikely enough in itself. But to be doing that down here? On his turf? I'd have never believed it if you hadn't seen him yourself and told me as much. It's gotta be bad, Robyn. And if it's bad for Kenny, it's probably bad for us."

"Fair." I sighed and leaned my head on the glass, it slightly steamed up from my mug. "You got a theory on the area they might be recruiting the kids?"

"Not a specific area of recruitment, but for keeping hold of them before either taking them back to whatever base of operations we were kept in… Yeah, I had an idea. It's just beyond the sunwells. We'll wait for Kenny to make contact, I think. No point going searching when he'll be looking at us specifically. He might even be willing to share some information."

I couldn't help the snort.

He smirked. "Fair."

"Hey, I hope you're right." I shrugged. "I just don't know that I will expect anything but a snort from the man when and if we get the chance to ask."

"Did he hurt you when you saw him?"

"He tried." I winked and received another handsome smirk for my troubles. Then I looked down and back to my tea. "What mainly hurt was him knowing about you being still taken, and apparently him doing fuck all about it."

"He cares about me as much as Vincent cared for you. I was useful at one point, I think. Maybe a little lingering affection for his sister was what made him take me in initially, but after that… No idea. I'm not his nephew in his eyes, I'm just some runt he got stuck with."

Sipping my tea, I ran it through my head. And in the end I had to disagree. He saw me shaking my head and tilted his own, still looking out the window every so often, but otherwise fixing me with that querying stare.

I shrugged. "I just think there's more outright affection there than you realise."

"Oh? You get him all teary-eyed and–"

"Don't sass me." I chuckled and looked out the window again, looking back on the uncertainty in Kenny when I spoke to him. The unsteadiness. "I won't say he's blubbing about you behind closed doors or anything. But he cares. On some level. Might not ever translate into actual action but… Sorry, I'm not making any sense."

"You're fine." Levi smiled softly. "If you saw it then… Who knows, maybe it is there. Can't say I plan on relying on it being any kind of saving grace though."

"Mm, good point." I put my head against the glass. "We're all still dealing with the sins and mistakes of our parents or guardians, aren't we?"

"We're all still dealing with the mistakes of a King that lived 100 years ago, and all the shit that came before him." Levi sighed and also put his head to the glass. "But maybe… Just maybe we're reaching the end of that shitty cycle. Maybe we can break it."

"My, my, there's that shiny optimism." I grinned at him and he rolled his eyes, a small blush appearing on his cheeks all the same. "But you're right. We might be. Wouldn't that be something? To finally break it, and make something new begin?"

"Hopefully something better." He got up and cracked his neck. "Might finally make some of this shit seem worth it, wouldn't it? We make it through time and time again, only to land in something else – be that another person's shitty plan, or another scheme, or… I don't fucking know at this point. Sorry, that probably sounded like I regretted–"

"No." I stood as well and went to him, taking his hand in mine. "You're allowed to be pissed about what's happened without demeaning the fact we survived. Okay? I'm tired too. We all are. You're allowed to be exhausted."

He held my hand so tightly for a moment, before raising it and kissing the back of it. "Thank you."

I chuckled. "For what?"

"For letting this old bastard have an outlet." He let go of my hand and touched my cheek for a moment. "I'm going to go do another perimeter check."

"I'll refresh the teas?"

"Good plan. Maybe find some food too, we're trying to get some meat back on your bones, remember?" He slung on his cape and headed out the door. I poured the teas and watched the lanterns of the city beyond light further and further out, rippling as if daytime had dropped like a stone into it and was making waves as people woke.

A break in the cycle.

A whole new chance.

Could we really find that? Out of all this blood, pain and loss? Could all that, and all that we have suffered, endured, healed from, bruised from, scarred from, could it all lead to a new beginning? A world without Titans. A life without war. A day not soaked in red. All that damned red, and the burning hatred, and the blood. That fucking blood. My blood, John's blood, my mother's blood.

I swallowed hard. My body fizzed.

I braced against the sill, my heart suddenly racing, like I'd just had the fright of my life, or had run a mile as fast as possible.

My mind whirled, flitting from the images of my childhood home burning, to the imagined scene I saw when Levi described losing his friends Isabel and Farlan, to the endless red of my life. From the split lips courtesy of Vincent, to the scraped knees while running with Keza, the sparring injuries thanks to training, and the near-misses once I became a Scout.

Where it began, the blood of my father so angry at the world and cruel. And the blood of my mother, so loving but ultimately unable to keep me safe from his wrath. My blood. Always. Alongside my friends, my family, my fellow humans. Red. It was like I was drowning in it. Burning. Always a flame, be it hollowing out my childhood home, or driving me to keep the fight going. Blood. The full circle. Back to the blood.

I blinked. Red. Burning. Blood. Why did those words always crop up together in my mind? Why did they go as hand in hand as Titans and greed, Scouts and loss, humans and fear. My knees quaked. Sweat beaded my brow. The hell was happening? Had I just figured something out? It didn't seem like it, but it sure as hell felt like it. And this strange fevered ache, just how I'd woken before this mission, when Levi had to scrape me out of bed long after the waking bell. The fuck?

"Robyn?"

I staggered back from the touch to my shoulder, my breaths still thin, my hands flailing and eyes watering. Levi retracted his hand, looking me over and then around the room. But there was no one else there. No one had attacked. No one had hurt me, at least not in the last five minutes. But my mind was scattered, and I didn't know how to explain it without sounding mad. He never saw me that way though, did he?

Fear shone in his eyes. "Robyn? Hey, it's Levi, can you… Can you see me?"

I nodded, trying to speak, to explain, but the words wouldn't leave my mouth. My head kept spinning between those three words. Red. Burning Blood. All the red, swirling, splashing, coating, steaming, choking, drowning. All the burning, embers, smoke, ash and hate. The blood. So many bodies piled high for the sake of wh–

Red. Burning. Blood.

On my knees, I gripped my hair, tugging as hard as I could. Stop it. Focus. Just–

Little Bird. It's all right. Just breathe, Little Bird.

"Robyn? It's alright, they're not here, they've not found us. Is… Is that it? Robyn?"

You can do it, Little Bird. In… And out… Like watching the wind blow through the washing, remember? In… whoosh! And out… whoosh!

Tears ran from my eyes and I clung to Levi, my heart still thundering, my skin slick with cold sweat, my mind gradually slowing. In. And out. In. And out. Levi held on, running his hand up and down my back.

"Levi." I gulped, my head against his chest. "Levi the… the phrase."

"What?" He tried to lean back, to look at my face, but I held on tighter. "Robyn what's going on, you're barely taking a breath. Just–"

"The phrase." I ground out, forcing the breaths to even out. "I… I dunno if it's part of it or w-what but these words. These fucking words."

"What words?"

"Red. Burning. Blood." I felt sick even saying them, like they were pure poison to me, like my body rejected even the notion of them. That wasn't all of it, like finding part of a map. But it was definitely part.

"Red, burning, blood?" He repeated. "You think that's part of their fucking phrase? Your… Vincent when you attacked him he kept blethering about blood, didn't he? Shit. How did you… Robyn?"

I focused on my breathing, head fit to burst with the pain building within my skull. My lungs didn't want to drink the air. My bones were ready to crumble. Every notch and mark on my back given to me by Vincent's hand ached in echoes of when he first sliced into my flesh. Full circle? Repeating history? I had no idea. But maybe we finally had a piece of the puzzle. Whatever the hell the puzzle actually led to. Cycles. I shuddered and stopped myself. One thing at a time. It was a win to have found those three words, to have caught a thread at last. And right now, clearly I couldn't dig further. If I did, I'd break.

Levi helped me into one of the chairs and gave me my tea, my hands shaking like mad at first, but with each sip it soothed me. My nerves settled. Cooling as the realisation settled between me and Levi. I breathed. I let the moments slip by.

"How're you feeling?" He kept his hand going up and down my back, the parchment Vincent had loved to use so much, the canvas littered by his madness. Or whatever the hell it really was.

"Like my whole mind was just hollowed out." I laughed breathlessly and sipped the tea again. "I have no idea what those words fucking mean but… Sh-Shit I think they're important."

"It might mean we have one piece of the puzzle the White Cloaks don't, so yeah, I reckon important. But right now I just need you to be–"

"I'm good." I smiled, looking up at him, and I have no idea what he saw but apparently it was a good thing. A small smile flashed across his features, along with relief. "Really, I'm good. Tired. Confused. Bloody shaking like a leaf but g-good."

"Really?"

"Yeah." I coughed and put a hand to my chest. "Sorry, it was just a lot all at once. Was like my head was gonna burst."

"I get that."

"I… I h-heard my mother."

"Your mother?" He frowned. "What do you mean?"

"I heard her soothing me, l-like she used to. Little Bird. She used to call me that when I was upset, or w-when I'd done something she really liked. I was her Little Bird."

He nodded, and we stayed in that gentle quiet for a while. He checked the windows, maintained the perimeter, took over the watch effectively. And bit by bit, I came back to myself. Red burning blood. Three words, and yet they made my spine tingle. The idea of them linked, together, strung on a sentence in one motion made them impact me like a pure injection of fear. And of what, I couldn't be certain. But it had to be the phrasing. Not all of it. But something in me, buried deep, dragged there by drugs and everything else Vincent had done, everything I had blocked out, knew to fear those words. But maybe we could do something to prevent it. Whatever it was.

By the time the others came down for their breakfast, I had pulled myself back together. Levi acted as normal. As did I. They didn't seem to have heard anything, and I would keep it that way. For now, the burden of knowledge would remain with me and Levi. If the White Cloaks did take us, I could hope that it might save the cadets some pain. Maybe. Then again, I would do everything in my power to avoid them knowing that kind of fate.

"So," Jean finished his breakfast. "We headed beyond the sun wells to investiga–"

"Sh." Levi looked towards the front door.

I stood, gear at the ready, eyes honed on the door. And in stepped a familiar silhouette. Kenny. He had come after all, but to make a mess or to make a deal? That would likely depend upon how tightly his leash was tied, and how close by his owners were to see his actions play out. We all took up defensive positions and double checked out the windows, no sign of him having back-up, but that didn't mean they weren't hidden. Our tangle with his lackeys up top had taught us that much.

Levi opened the door before the knock came and Kenny stood, cigar smoking like always, slowly lowering his hand. He smirked. He chewed the damn cigar. He stepped inside. The door clicked shut and I kept my eyes on him like he were a snake sliding past, able to lash out at any second. He looked the same as last time, still scarred up, still doing his damndest to stand as tall as possible.

He sat and dragged another chair over to prop his foot up on. "So, once again I find you Scouts scurryin' around where you shouldn't be, huh? Why's it this time? Holiday? Hm, judging by them big ol' bunch of gear hanging off your hips, I'd say not. What, you think we got Titans down here?" He laughed and smoke billowed from his lips.

Levi glared from the doorway, but I could see the tension in his jaw. My Captain was furious. Incensed by his own rage. He had no idea how to start that conversation without simply cutting Kenny's head off, did he? The man that had raised him had known about his captivity with the White Cloaks, and had done nothing. It hadn't made much impact before, but maybe that all fell away with Kenny sat right there. In the flesh.

I could buy Levi some time. "This seems very gracious of you, Kenny."

"Oh? How's that?" He tipped his hat back a little, looking me over.

"Pretty sure last time you made some big threats if we came snooping again, yet here you are for another social conversation? You lost your bite, old man? Is it just a bark left?" I tilted my head, the chewing of his cigar getting that bit rougher. "Hm? They holding your leash that bit too tightly? Or better yet, have they stopped paying attention entirely, and you're trying to crawl your way back into their good books?"

"Watch your mouth–"

"Don't think I will. Why're you here Kenny? To threaten? Because right now those words are feeling real empty, bouncing around this home with nothing to stick to. But you're also smart enough to know that."

"Oh she compliments me now."

"No, I'm pointing out the facts." I looked him over. "Kenny the Ripper doesn't last as long as you have without having some damn sense. So if you know the threats aren't going to land, then why bother coming at all? Could be keeping up appearances. Or…" I grinned and looked towards the door, then back to him. "Or you are keeping up appearances while trying to bargain for our help. Can you even go up top anymore? You back here, or are you still here?"

Levi blinked, the light coming back to his eyes, hopefully as he latched onto the same theory I had. The White Cloaks kept Kenny for his key part to play in controlling the Underground, and that was where they planned to keep him. Whether he liked it or not. And judging by the fire in the old gits eyes, he didn't like that being known. His leash was tight indeed.

Kenny glared at me long and hard, either scrambling for something to rebut me with, or trying to spook me. Either way he was struggling.

I glanced to others, all of them on high alert like the good soldiers they were. "C'mon Kenny, we have other things to be doing. What is it that you want from us? You came to talk rather than attack outright, so you want something."

"Nah, little lady, you need something from me."

"Oh?" I looked to Levi and he stepped closer, nodding to me, able to take the reins. I allowed it, my heart hammering against my chest so hard I would be surprised if no one else had spotted it. As much as I could stand up to a big rat, I didn't exactly enjoy it. Kenny had too many similarities with Vince not to shake me.

Levi sighed wearily. "What is it you think we need from you?"

"Answers." Kenny snarled, eyes landing on Levi like bullets. "They're getting closer to that damn phrase, y'know, don't you fancy being clued in on what they're gonna use it for?"

I kept my face impassive. Kenny didn't need to know I may have clawed a few words of that damned phrase out of my lost memories, he also didn't need to know how much the whole thing scared me to death. Control was one of those things, looming in the back of my mind, pulling on my strings– shit! My eyes snapped back to Levi. Control. He had mentioned something about control before, that the little cadet bitch that stuck me with that syringe mentioned 'control'. They had taken six months, but they had created a sense of control over Levi. Albeit a very situational one, and specifically triggered by very specific circumstances. Not easily repeated. So if they wanted a puppet, they needed someone like me, someone who had been turned into an obedient puppet for years by their bastard of a father. And why? Well, why had they wanted control over Levi? To take down the Scouts. To stop them. To stop us. And if they knew about my 'kind of' Shifter abilities, they might intend to undermine this time of piece by having me turn. By showing the public how the Scouts and new Queen had 'lied' to them all. Shifters were still the enemy, like the Titans. Keep the people scared, small, stupid.

Laughter escaped me. "Nevermind Kenny, you can fuck off."

Levi raised a brow. "Sanshi?"

I looked to my Captain and snorted. "I figured it out. Like a lamp being lit in my mind, answers fell into place. We've no need to entertain his bullshit anymore."

"Excuse me?" Kenny stood and strode over to me, looming. Everyone changed position, ready to intervene if needed, but he was once again just barking. No weapon. Nothing. Just a snarl and some height. And I think Levi knew that too, he had stepped closer when Kenny moved, but his hand only reached for his blades, nothing was drawn. Kenny had been de-clawed. The Ripper himself looked me over like shit scraped from his shoe. "Sass is one thing, but you keep in mind who you're talking to. I'm–"

"I'm talking to a puppet, eager to have his strings cut."

"I got no fuckin' strings on m–"

"If they wanted Levi as a puppet to then kill me, to undermine the Scouts, then… Well," I winked and his upper lip curled in a grimace. "Pretty sure that means my control would be for a rather similar reason. Take down the Scouts, demolish all that we have built, take things back to the way they were, shrouded in ignorance and fear. What better way than to get the people of the walls scared of the Titans again, scared to look to anyone forward thinking again, than to undermine those that had pushed forward. Show the people a Shifter is still against them, still ravaging their lives and breaking their precious walls… and what do they do? Huddle. Cower. Cling to anything even remotely stable… Like the White Cloaks, or whatever form of government they present themselves as at the time."

I was right. At least partially.

I felt it to my bones, only made more certain by the way Kenny's eyes widened that tiny fraction and showed that sliver of disbelief. His bargaining chip had been ripped out of his hand.

Leaning back, I looked him over slowly. "So, with that little piece of the puzzle out of the way, what do you have to offer? What help exactly do you need?"

"Should've killed you when you was a kid." He growled, spitting his cigar to the side.

"Probably. I was always a tough little shit, but now I also know how to deal with you big shits. And trust me, compared to Titans, Vincent and those White Cloak bastards, you don't scare me all that much these days, Ripper. You're just a washed up thug who lost the game. You wanted your power, your reward for licking the kings boots. Well here it is, in all its shit stained glory. You're no better than the rest of us, you're just a bit taller."

Silence filled the house. Within my head was the thunder of my heart, and true enough he could probably see how hard I was trembling – but it was a mixture of conditioned fear as well as my triumphant excitement. Yes, it was still terrifying to consider that there was some shitty phrasing of words that might turn me into the means of killing all my friends, but at least now I could see why the White Cloaks were doing it. They had plans, back up plans, side plans, all of it. But at least there was only one me. As far as we knew.

Kenny gritted his teeth. "Y'can't stop them."

"They said that about the Titans. And yet? We took back Maria. We will take back everything else as well. And we will stop the White Cloaks."

"Arrogant little bitch."

"Scared old man."

He tried to grab my throat, but I just kneed him in the balls. He crumpled to one knee, breathing hard, looking up with fire in his eyes. "Y'think you've won?"

"Not at all." I shook my head. "But I'm not about to let idle threats get in the way of what we're doing. You knew what they were doing to Levi, you did nothing to stop it. And while they almost succeeded, they didn't. He didn't kill me, and we managed to break their hold. And now? Across all that pain, we've found an answer. Like Scouts do."

"Keep goin' missy and they'll–"

"What? Beat me? Torture me? Drug me? Starve me?" I flicked his hat off. "They've done all that and more. So no, I'm not being arrogant. I'm just done with waiting around for another kick to the stomach. Wanna know who taught me that? Who showed me that my stubbornness could pay off?"

Kenny looked to Levi.

I nodded. "Well done. Yes, that man there, the one you walked away from and like to call 'runt'. The only runt I see Kenny, is you. All powerful from the shadows, sure, but now the lights are fucking on. The Scouts, Captain Levi, they try, they fight. And they're damned good at it. I just so happen to be lucky enough to be in their ranks."

"Don't make me use it." His lips thinned.

I narrowed my eyes. "Use it? What, you suggesting you've known the phrase all along?"

"Who was keeping tabs on your old man, bitch?"

I straightened up and looked to Levi, his eyes focused on Kenny. The others were either looking at the old man or at me. A new angle, for sure. A potentially dangerous one, but another of his cards laid out on the table. I nodded to them. If they had to, they could subdue me easily enough, right?

My eyes focused back on him. "Kenny, if you knew it, why not give it to the White Cloaks?"

"I play the long-game, missy." He got to his feet, only slightly wobbly.

"Or you're full of shit." I nodded to Levi. "My Captain has some questions about the White Cloaks recruitment."

Kenny sneered. "Changin' the subject, eh?"

"Just not letting you play any more games with us." I shrugged and stepped back.

Levi stepped forward. "Yes, let's stop playing around. If you do want our help, then you're going to have to answer some questions, and I mean straight answers, not some cryptic shit."

"I never said I wanted your he–"

"Do you know where the recruitment shit goes down?" My Captain stood firm, no sign of his tension from before, just the cool-headed determination I knew and loved. Whatever time he had needed, I think I'd provided it. And perhaps his protective side was rearing its head. Just a little. "I have my theories, but if you can remove some of the guesswork, I'd be glad to hear it."

"So what, you planning savin' everyone down here? Taking us all up there into the pretty sunshine? Like your two wee friends? How'd that work out, Levi? Huh?"

My Captain rolled his eyes. "We've already made changes, even you can see that, you old shit."

"Aye, I see it. I see people comin' down here and meddlin'. That's all you've ever done is meddle. Your mother knew better than that."

Levi's eyes tightened. "Indeed, and where did it get her?"

Kenny's teeth bared. "You're a fuckin' fool."

"Likewise. Now then, fancy answering, or shall we just get moving on our own?"

"You lot make no damn sense." Kenny brushed himself down, fixed his hat and lit up a fresh cigar. He shook his head. "All bravado and shit on the field, sure. Out there killin' monsters. But in here you're no different to the rest of us, on the ground, just stumblin' from one step to the next. So where'd you get off in thinking you can take the likes of them down? They ain't mindless beasts."

"Disagree." I crossed my arms over my chest, meeting his glare head on.

He puffed smoke in my direction. "And it's that sorta thinkin' that'll get ya killed."

Levi stepped in between me and Kenny. "We're leaving. Gather your things."

There wasn't much to gather, but even so, the minutes dragged on with Kenny watching every movement, like a dog readying to pounce. Except I couldn't see it as a threat. It was just sad. He had nothing left to hold onto, did he? No threats, no bargaining, no power or prestige. He was the lowest rung right now, and if we walked out, his ladder vanished.

The cadets were ready, and as we slung on our cloaks, Levi held the door open. "Good bye, Kenny."

And we walked out.

We only got a street away before his yelling came after us, in bellowing barks he followed, and I stuck close to my Captain. He stared ahead, jaw tight as the yelling continued. Kenny would not be lost easily down there, and now he was panicking. Cornered. Which meant he was only getting more dangerous.

Levi sighed. "Alright. Eyes ahead, we may have a fight on our hands yet… But for now, keep going forward. We aim for the sunwells, and I'll lead from there. Got it?"

And as a team, unanimously, we answered. "Yes, sir!"

We would do what we came here to do. Find the White Cloaks recruitment, root it out, and allow a fresh start for the people of the Underground. Whether Kenny liked it or not… And with or without his help…

Cheers! Cya next time!