CHAPTER 18

NICOLETTE

Nicki had been sitting in front of that tent for long. Silence had never been a bother to her, she had always liked it; thinking, wondering. But since this apocalypse started, or more specifically, when people around her started to die, the silence have been a strange companion to her, that made her think of all the friends she had lost, about what she could have done to help and about what she didn't do. Silence was not welcoming like before, anymore.

"Shorty, you're still there?" she asked suddenly leaning her back against the tent.

"What do you want?" he asked in a hush tone.

What did she want… she didn't know. But she really didn't want to think anymore. She didn't want to close her eyes to see Amy, Jim and Jaqui again. She didn't want to remember the last time she saw Sophia and how her body froze. She didn't want to remember the day she said at home that she should have flown to Atlanta for an archery competition, how her parents told her that they couldn't bring her there, and how Sarah had happily offered to go instead.

"Nothing" she said shaking her head "There's nothing I want" nothing that he could do, anyway.

"They are not coming back" Carl said from inside the tent and Nicki looked down.

"You don't know that" she said, hoping to hear the sound of a car coming closer, but nothing.

"And you know that?"

Nicolette rolled her eyes "I'm trying to be supportive here" but what was the point she didn't know. Maybe he was right, maybe they should think of the worse, maybe it would have been easier. Or maybe their life would have never been easy again.

"I miss school" Nicolette said at some point "I miss ignoring people and their chattering, there."

"So, it's not the apocalypse" Carl said "You've always been rude" at that Nicki found herself chuckle.

"If you like to think it that way" she said turning towards the tent "Do you miss school?"

"I miss my friends" he answered making her nod.

"So, you had friends" she said "That's a surprise."

"Sophia was my friend" at Carl's words Nicki looked down.

"Yeah, that's true" she muttered. They really got along and he had never been rude to the girl; they laughed and played.

"Maybe she'd know what to tell you" Nicki said thinking about the girl and how much she smiled. And she remembered that she had never shared so many words with her.

Suddenly a zipping sound made her turn, to see Carl appear from the open tent.

"Why do you want to talk to me so much?" Carl asked curiously, observing her with inquisitive blue eyes.

"In all honesty?" she asked looking at him, that nodded "It's easier than think" she admitted at the end. He stood quiet for a moment; his gaze fixed on her.

"You're terrible at talking" he said at some point and she found herself let out a chuckle.

"I can't argue with that" that seemed to surprise him, but before he could give one of his usual quick remarks the sound of a car made them look towards the fence.

"It's Shane" she said turning to the boy, that looked at the passing car with hopeful eyes, before jumping on his feet followed by Nicki.

They ran across the camp, avoiding the tents. As they got closer, Nicki spotted everyone around the car, even if she wondered why her sister wasn't there. But she felt relieved when she saw Lori. Shane had found her and she was safe, even if on her forehead there was a cut. She and Carl kept running, but they stopped when they heard Shane talk "First thing first, I gotta be sure the baby's all right, okey?"

Nicolette jaw dropped as Carl step forward.

"You're having a baby?" he exclaimed getting everyone's attention "Why didn't you tell me?" Lori was looking at her son with wide eyes, not able to formulate an answer and by the look of everyone else, nobody knew and that was a shock.

"Come on" said Dale, his eyes still wide like everyone else's "Let's make sure you're all right" he then gestured her to follow him into the house.

As the others were going with Lori, Nicolette heard some steps from behind her.

"It's that Lori?" her sister's voice made her turn, but she was pretty sure her mouth was still opened in shock "Oh thank, goddess."

"Yeah" Nicki said pointing at Lori "And she is pregnant."

"She's what?" Sarah asked with wide eyes.

"You didn't know too" Nicki said nodding her head "That's make it… all of us actually."

"Oh my god" Sarah whispered before walking towards the house.

Nicki was quick to follow as they entered the room. Maggie turned towards the door when she heard them run in, her expression still shocked.

"Sarah, Lori-"

"Nicki told me" Sarah said nodding her head.

"She is in there" Maggie said pointing at the living room "Patricia already got some band aids, I'm going to Beth."

"Band aid?" Sarah muttered before entering the other room, where Lori was sitting on the sofa. Carl was next to her, while on the chair next to them there was Dale and Andrea, sitting on the armrest.

"Lori" Sarah said kneeling in front of the woman, that was holding some ice on the cut on her forehead.

"Sweety" Lori said with a heavy sigh.

"Are you alright?" she asked and the woman nodded her head. Nicolette moved around the room until she laid her back against the wall in front of the scene, her bow secured in her hands.

"I've been in an accident" Lori said "But I'm alright."

"Are you sure?" asked Andrea observing the other woman closely. They were all thinking the same thing; what the hell happened? And; how is it possible you are pregnant?

And Lori must have known that because she turned to Carl "I'm so sorry, I left without telling you" She whispered as Sarah got up to walk towards the kitchen.

Carl nodded his head "It's okey" he said softly "I wasn't scared" Nicolette observed him; the way he said it, she could have almost believed him, and she knew his mom believed him. She was almost impressed at his self-control, how he didn't want to worry Lori. Nicki really thought he would have been angry at her, but he didn't.

Sarah got back with a glass of water, putting it in front of Lori and then sit on a chair next to the sofa.

"When is dad getting back?" Carl asked calmly waiting patiently for his mother to answer.

"Let's hope soon" Lori said. That was impressive, how the Grimes family always seemed to find each other. She couldn't help but feel slightly jealous at what she knew she couldn't have.

"I want to be there when you'll tell him about the baby" Carl said looking at his mother with a sweet expression, it seemed almost strange on his face.

Lori took a deep breath "Oh, love, he already knows" she whispered rubbing his back "We were just trying to find the right time to tell you."

"Is it a boy or a girl?" Carl asked curiously and Nicki looked at him amused by the question.

"We won't know until it's born" Lori explained with a sweet smile that only grew bigger when Carl put a hand on her belly.

"Will I be able to feel it?"

"Not for a while" Lori said, but Carl seemed pretty happy by the news. He had a little smile on his face as he kept looking at his mom, that seemed a bit more worried.

"You must have a lot of questions" she said, before turning to Dale, Andrea and Sarah a bit unsure "We… never had the talk."

At that Nicki snorted, gaining the eyes of the others on her. Carl frowned at her, as Sarah glared at her mouthing her to stop. Nicki wasn't sure why she found it amusing, she just couldn't help herself, maybe it was because he thought he was so mature, but he still had to have the talk about flowers and bees.

"Don't look at me" Dale said when Carl turned to him, waiting for answers "That's your father job."

"Oh please, can I watch?" Nicki said letting out another snort.

"Nicolette!" Sarah said still glaring.

After a cold scowl, Carl turned to his mother, ignoring Nicki "If the baby is a girl, can we call her Sophia?"

That made everyone stop for a moment, thinking again about the little girl, that now was no more among them. But Nicki's eyes got caught by Shane's frame, making his way towards the room. He was pale and he was strange. Nicolette has been observing him for long; he was unpredictable, sometimes he seemed the Shane she had met that day just outside of Atlanta, but other times he seemed angry and violent. And dangerous. Like in front of the barn.

"Hey. I'm sorry, bud. I thought you knew" Shane said looking at Carl, as Nicki noticed Dale standing up, eyeing the man. She wondered if he had doubts too.

The boy flicked his sheriff hat hit his fingers, puffing his chest proudly "Big brother, Carl, pretty cool huh?"

Nicolette already felt for the baby. Her attention was fixed on Shane, though. She just couldn't help it, even because the strange expression on Lori's face didn't distract her. The very contrary.

"It's very cool" Shane chuckled a bit awkwardly, before clearing his throat to ask something else "You mind if I talk with your mom a sec?"

Nicki found herself stepping away from the wall, but it was Andrea the one who spoke next "How about a little later?" she suggested "After she gets some rest."

Shane glared at Andrea for a moment before starting to talk anyway "Lori, I had to get you back here" he said "You wouldn't have come otherwise" they all were staring at the man, only Lori was trying to avoid him. Nicolette remembered how close the two of them were, that was surely a strange behaviour the one Lori was having. What had happened between those two?

"How about you just hear me out, please?" he would have not let go. But did Lori really want to talk to him? Carl must have felt the discomfort of his mother too, because he ignored Shane until Lori assured him that it was ok to leave them to talk alone.

"How about we eat something?" said Sarah putting her hands on Carl's shoulders as he stood up "Nicolette" she called her, when she noticed that the girl wasn't moving.

Nicki observed Shane, that felt her eyes on him and when he looked at her, she held his gaze for a moment, her back straight and crossed arms. She knew something was off, and maybe now he knew that she knew. But she didn't care. So, as her sister called for her again, Nicolette made her way towards the kitchen.

They ate in silence. Or at least Nicki was silent. Carl was talking to the others about the news and they ate together and in tranquillity. Nicki couldn't help but glare at the living room, in her mind another memory; that morning at the CDC, on Shane's neck there were four scratches. Strange marks to have it caused it on his own.

Was she being paranoid?

Was she becoming crazy?

But all the strangeness surrounded Shane just kept growing in her mind.

Why did he cut his hair when he got back with the supplies for Carl?

Why did he have Otis' gun, if by what he had told them, he had made Shane run ahead to keep the walkers away? How would he do that without his gun?

Many questions. Many memories and theories. Was she becoming obsessed with it? Was she overreacting?

She didn't know. She wasn't sure. And with those thoughts she laid back in her tent, tossing and turning to try and get some sleep. Suddenly the zip of the entrance opened to let Sarah slip inside and then close it behind herself.

"Where were you?" Nicki asked making her sister gasp.

"I thought you were sleeping" she said with a hand on her heart "Did I wake you?"

Nicki shook her head "I wasn't sleeping" she said observing her sister taking off her boots.

"So?" she asked after a moment of silence "Where were you?"

"What are you? A cop?" answered Sarah with a chuckle.

"Maybe it's my calling" she said resting on her elbows to look at her sister, waiting for her answer.

"I just brought something to eat to Daryl" Sarah said laying down, slipping inside the sleeping bag.

"He's still down there?" Nicki asked. She had saw him taking all his staff and move them across the yard. Sarah nodded.

"He was laying down" Sarah answered taking a deep breath "But I wouldn't let him starve."

Nicki nodded her head. Her sister had always thought about the others, taking care of them. She was very good at that and people had always appreciated that quality of hers. Sarah was sweet and proper, witty and talkative. Sometimes Nicki wondered how it would have been like to be a little bit like her sister. Making friends and don't being odd.

She wondered how Sarah felt about Glenn being missing and she wondered what she was feeling since her friend seemed to want to spend all his time with Maggie. She didn't seem bothered, but was she faking it? Like Nicki did sometimes; pretending that nothing was wrong so that others wouldn't worry about her.

Yeah… she was really overthinking.

It took a bit of time, but after maybe an hour she had finally managed to stop her racing mind and get some sleep. Her slumber had been so deep that she woke up the next morning. Sarah had already woken up like the others.

"The town is twenty minutes away" Shane was saying getting the car ready.

"We should take two cars" Daryl added getting the riffle ready "In case we need to get them" Sarah was next to him, nodding her head. Her hair tight in a ponytail as she filled a gun with bullets.

"So, formations are Andrea and T, with me" Shane recapped.

"An' Sarah with me" Daryl said shutting the door of the car.

"You're going now?" Nicolette asked making her way towards the group. Her sister looked at her and with a small smile she nodded her head.

"Do you need help?"

Sarah shared a look with Andrea before making her way towards Nicki "Sweety, stay here for now, okey?" she asked "Keeping an eye on Lori and Carol."

Nicki took a breath "Not sure this is going to help, but alright."

They were almost ready to go, when the sound of a car engine made them all turn. "Is it them?" asked Sarah with a smile forming on her lips.

"It seems so" chuckled T-Dog as they followed the car.

As they stopped Lori, Carl, Maggie and Carol walked out of the house and as Rick get down of the vehicle Carl was quick to run to him and hug him with a happy chuckle. Nicki released a breath when she saw that Hershel was with them. Maggie smiled before running to the car, but not to hug her father, she got passed him to hug Glenn. Nicki turned towards her sister, that was giggling happily from between Daryl and T.

"Patricia" Hershel said to the woman as he walked towards the house "Prepare the shed for surgery."

Surgery?

Nicki's eyes scanned Rick and Glenn, but they seemed alright. A bit shaken up, but they seemed safe.

"Thank God they're alright" Sarah said not so far from Nicki, that turned to observed her sister. She saw her looking up at Daryl with a smile.

"Thank you" she said, making the man turn to her.

"For what?" he asked.

"For agreeing to come with us" she answered looking at him sweetly, but he just scoffed.

"Shut up" his words made Sarah giggle, before she turned to walk towards Glenn sharing a quick hug.

"What's with the face?" Sarah asked with a frown "Are you alright?" Glenn was nodding his head quietly, when T-Dog's voice made them turn.

"Who the hell is that?" he was pointing at the car, only now Nicki noticed a man's figure sitting in the backseat. He didn't seem to be older than Sarah.

"That's Randall" Glenn answered simply and that made Nicki frown.

"And who would he be?" she asked making the others turn towards her.