Chapter LXII

You Can Cry

As I suspected, Naruto is invasive and far too dependent on me.

After offering a vase for the many poor torn flowers, I go to the bedroom and sit on my bed to read, for fear of being taken hostage while facing another awkward situation. Unsurprisingly, the sapphire-eyed boy lays his head on my thighs, cuddling me to sleep. He even wraps his tail around my abdomen to make sure I don't leave… Luckily, he doesn't snore much and just mutters intelligible things.

Unfortunately, his unusual behaviour continues. No matter what room I go to, Naruto follows me like an annoying lapdog. I have to turn him away at my bathroom door; behind it, he's patiently waiting for me to come out… Needless to say, this quickly gets on my nerves.

Furthermore, he rushes to take his shower, and returns in less than five minutes. Soaked, he left water absolutely everywhere. He's in such a hurry that he rinsed badly, still covered with soap here and there; at that, he put his clothes on inside out and askew… I decide to watch him while he finishes his work correctly.

Again. I get into an argument with him. Naruto is as determined to make me live like a nocturnal creature, and I have no choice but to threaten him, so that he'll poison me. To my misfortune, I wake up before the sun, although I didn't dream all night. My being isn't covered in static electricity; Naruto didn't come to sleep, hugging me with all his limbs since I was already up.

All in all, I can breathe. Naruto is himself again… Maa, sort of.

My patience is about to burst…

Alas, my ordeal isn't over…

Another outing is planned today…

As agreed, Shikamaru comes around noon to walk Naruto. Although Naruto is greatly enthusiastic, he begs me to accompany him. Nonetheless, after giving me a hug, he agrees to go alone with the other boy. Shikamaru plans to take him to a greener area, free of floral entities to avoid problems. He roughly summarizes to me that he had to reimburse the damage, in addition to apologizing numerous times to the old lady, who was upset about the irreparable destruction.

Shikamaru wants to introduce him to the other rookies. They're aware that Naruto is a chakra devourer; at that, they don't believe in the many harmful rumours. I hope that I can leave my apartment very soon, in peace, without my feral handbag hanging on my arm.

With patience and anguish, I wait for their return; worry poisons me. I'm afraid that Naruto will act up, or be consumed by his beast instincts while I'm not here. Another fury will put him under arrest. He will end in a cage, me included.

I try to occupy my mind, but my destructive torments leave me no respite; a real fight against myself. I struggle against the urge to take a look, to make sure everything is going well. This anxiety-inducing ball that twists my stomach doesn't help me find hunger either … hunger as absent as Naruto in these four walls, in which solitude is felt.

I can release the pressure when they finally return after two hours. Humming, the blond quickly clings to me and he doesn't let go of me. Apart from a few unintentional bruises, Shikamaru tells me this outing went well. Naruto wasn't aggressive when he met one of his comrades from his previous life.

I congratulate Naruto excessively—something that accentuates his joy and his strange melodies.

However, once alone with my student, I fear his separation anxiety disorder and his emotional dependence of me about to resurface…

- XxX -

Soon-to-be prey to an unbearable and invasive Naruto, I sweat. I exhale a long, painful sigh. Inevitably, he will never let go of me; if I rely on yesterday, it's obvious.

My head down in defeat, I walk to my room. Naruto has broken away from me and is moving ahead, wagging his tail happily. He jumps on the bed and impatiently waits for me, to the point of trembling. He's greatly excited that I'm joining him, that's understood.

Slowly, I sit on the edge of the bed. I show him my back; a hope that he won't be interested in me more than that. I hope the blond falls into Morpheus's arms quickly. However, instead of lying down, Naruto approaches me on all fours. His hands slide through my silver mane, making me shudder. Out of the corner of my eye, I see him examining it. Then he pouts and frowns, making a noise of some sort. Apparently, something is bothering him about my hair.

"Naruto, sleep!" I order him dryly, frowning in turn.

My student ignores me, and his sapphire blue eyes don't deviate—on the contrary, he examines my head in depth. He sniffs it, giving me goosebumps. As he sticks his tongue out, I quickly and roughly slam a hand against his face to push him away. I don't know what his intentions are, and I don't care; I don't want his mutated tongue or his filthy drool near me.

"No matter what you want to do, it's out of the question!"

In response, Naruto growls, raising a few hairs in annoyance. I jump to leave… However, my butt doesn't have time to leave the sheets as I'm grabbed by Naruto's arms, with which he pulls me back. Unable to match his brute strength, I'm dragged away.

Without an ounce of delicacy, he lays me on my stomach. He quickly sits on me before restraining me. His black tail twists like a viper around my legs to tie them together. While holding my arms at full length against my body, he wraps his legs around my torso and them.

It all happens so fast that I don't have time to react. The moment before, I was getting up; the next one, I'm on the sheets, tied with flesh and absolute restraints.

I struggle; I squirm miserably … in vain. My heart races, my breathing quickens. I growl in turn and fight against these damn ties which don't move, not even an inch. I'm taken hostage by Naruto with a very specific idea in mind that worries me. Meanwhile, he put his hands on my shoulders to crush me into the sheets, thus reducing my range of action.

"NARUTO! ENOUGH! YOU FREE ME AND YOU SLEEP!" I grumble angrily, continuing my sad attempt to free myself.

Naruto raises his face, brings it closer to mine. His lips are too close to my ear. My student whispers an impossible-to-understand sound that makes me shiver. Then, without warning, he licks my hair. With horror and disgust, he shamelessly smears them with his viscous drool. I fall into a stupor, in which my brain shuts down for a breath, as if my mind refuses to believe that it's really happening, convinced that I'm dreaming.

As soon as this mental fog clears, I struggle even more. I give Naruto a good headbutt to make him stop. This takes him by surprise since he steps back while blinking.

"You gonna stop, yes?! You're supposed to sleep! Not—"

In the middle of my sentence, he crushes my face into the sheets to keep me still. He grunts, gradually increasing the pressure on my skull, as I wriggle to raise my head … unsuccessfully. I can no longer speak or breathe. With difficulty, I try to find air… Fortunately, my student relaxes his grip enough to allow me to do so. While maintaining his hold over me, he resumes his activity. He stains my hair with his filthy slime as if nothing had happened. I can't even move my head; it's securely fixed in place.

Disgusted and angry, I stare at him … as best as I can, given my neutralized self. "Na… Naruto… You…"

My pitiful murmurs immediately die out when Naruto hisses, and this high-pitched hiss makes the hairs on my arms and the back of my neck stand on end; this wild noise chokes my throat and forces me to silence. The blond expresses his annoyance at my fierce struggle to resist him. His veil of static electricity causes many unpleasant tingles all over my skin; he's about to electrocute me like the other day…

To my misfortune, although he doesn't scratch me, he continues to desecrate my hair, which is gradually becoming wet with his slimy spit. One of his hands slides between my heavy locks and brushes them with his bodily substance; at that, his drool erases the sensations and I start to feel cold.

The only explanation I can think of is that he's "cleaning" my hair… In fact, if I rely on these moments during which he coated his blond hair with saliva, it can only be that. I guess Naruto values me enough to "take care" of me and my hygiene, even if I haven't asked him for anything, not to mention the eternally non-existent desire for such a request. Given that it's a sign of affection in some animals, I can only believe it…

Is it because I didn't take a shower this morning that he deems it necessary to impose it on me against my will?

I don't know…

That fight is lost in advance. I give up and stop moving, rolling my eyes. Faced with my surrender, Naruto stops crushing my skull in my sheets… However, when I move to be "comfortable," the blond becomes still. He growls loudly and hesitates to restrict my head once more… When I'm motionless again, he continues his "grooming," using both hands this time.

Reluctantly, I obediently allow him…

I accept his disgusting grooming…

Which drags on horribly over time…

I want to disappear and throw up. My frontal locks are sticking to my skin. Many icy, sticky drop of drool slide down my face, staining my sheets. His saliva dries over time, including my skin with its now altered sensations. The whole thing is uncomfortable, an agony of uneasiness, not to mention his vile and sickening mouth noises. Naruto pulls his legs out from under my body. I could push him away, but I'm willing to bet that he'll trap me even tighter if I try to escape…

After a painful moment, Naruto finally stops his humidification ritual. He hums and runs his hands through my silver hair several times to undo the slightest knot…

"…It's good...? You're done...?" I complain.

True to his silence, my student doesn't answer me. I hear him yawn to my great relief… However, my ordeal is far from over.

Naruto rolls onto his side, his back against the wall. Before I can move, he grabs my chest again. He embraces me and makes me his little spoon… Immediately, my face is overheated, scarlet; my love organ races, and I hold my breath. My legs are still tied up by his tail. Obviously, if I try to leave, he crushes me to keep me captive.

I want to scream.

My arms are too short to snatch a book. I avoid at all costs touching the slightest grey locks that adorn my head. I have to stay there… Wait for my student to fall asleep before leaving my bunk. I refuse to admit it, but I like being in his arms like this, and I feel weird. I can't describe the emotion that overwhelms me…

My mind is obsessed with a single thought: showering and purifying my defiled hair.

It doesn't take long for Naruto to sink, allowing me to regain my freedom. Very carefully, I release each of my legs from his tail. I crawl out of bed, making sure not to wake him. I don't even cover him with the blanket. Too risky. Slowly, I slip away, taking a change of clothes. In my bathroom, I delicately close the door, being as silent as a grave.

I freeze when I see my reflection.

Expecting a catastrophic disaster, I notice that my hair is sparkling; real silver threads that undulate with grace and magnificence. Stunned, I blink several times, and curiosity takes hold of me. I slide a careful hand into these… These are … soft and silky instead of gross as hell. I'm speechless. I'm frozen, unable to look away from the mirror. I've never had hair as shiny and shimmering like this. I forget that it's covered in Naruto's saliva, and now I'm hesitant to wash my head.

Is it the reason why his blond mane and fur are so pleasant to the touch? If his drool produces the same phenomenon on his own hair, it can only be that… Now, I'm disgusted at the idea of touching him… But the damage has already been done, and has been for a long time.

After some time debating with myself, I only clean my body, especially my face. I dread the blond waking up at nightfall. Although these outings are positive for him, they're nightmares for me. Naruto is getting too comfortable and is becoming more and more disobedient. When he has a very specific idea in mind that includes me, he refuses to listen to me, to the point of giving me electric shocks.

Was I too lenient with the sapphire-eyed boy?

Suddenly, the bathroom handle shakes, pulling me out of my thoughts. My heart stops, and I open my shower door to look at the still handle.

Am I hallucinating things?

I panic as it moves more and more frantically, and I hear scrapes on the other side. 'No fucking way,' I grumble, realizing that Naruto is trying to get in, although I've carefully locked the door.

I just have time to grab a cloth to hide my face as Naruto finally gets in; the door almost comes off its hinges, and the broken handle causes a dull, metallic noise when it falls onto the tiles. After giving me a brief look, my student sits on the ground, hugs his legs in front of him and wraps his black tail around himself; at that, his deep blue eyes avoid me, as if his life depended on it. His toes bending and unbending betray his anxiety.

"You gotta be kidding! What the hell!?" I grumble aloud, tying a towel around my waist to hide my crotch.

My glare is black. Naruto curls up and holds his breath. He knows he did something stupid. Besides, he was sleeping soundly. In his slumber, he realized that I was gone. Because of his anxiety disorder, he rushed to me and violated my privacy. I don't know at all how to react and what to do.

Console him?

Lecture him?

Defenestrate him?

I'm undecided. The anger makes my blood boil in my veins. I just ignore Naruto while I dry off and get dressed. I'm half soaked, and I don't care. I'm so upset that it's the least of my worries.

With a determined step, I grab Naruto by the collar, forcing him to stand. He doesn't resist me, although he whines. "Let's get things straight, shall we?!" My voice is cold, and my face is a few centimetres from his. "I won't disappear like that, and I won't leave you all alone! I promised you, Naruto! I will keep my word! So, stop imagining the opposite, got it?!"

Immediately, I take him in my arms. "Trust me a little, Naruto. I know you're afraid of losing me, and that's not gonna happen anytime soon. I'm here, very close to you. Even if you don't see me, even if I'm several metres away from you, even kilometres, I'm very close. I always watch over you, even if your eyes don't see me, even if my eyes don't see you. I'm here, very close."

A silence reigns … broken by our hearts beating together. After an unspeakable amount of time, Naruto shyly hugs me back and shakes like a leaf. He holds back his tears; he hiccups with grief despite himself.

"You can cry, Naruto."

My words are immediate.

Unable to hold back, Naruto suddenly released the pressure. He cries out his sadness as he snuggles tightly into my arms. He releases rivers of sorrow that have been stuck in his eye sockets for too long. Mechanically, I gently stroke his hair, which is covered in static electricity. His despair and pain are enough to chase away the anger in me.

This confirms my doubts. These last few days, he suppressed his emotions, so as not to worry me. I wonder if this isn't one of the reasons why he became so invasive and dependent on me after these short periods without me. I don't know what twisted scenarios he's come up with on his own, but obviously, they include me and are probably linked to his fears of losing me in some way…

At least, I convince myself that it's that.

Author Note: You are not ready for the next chapter.