AN: Thank you so much for all the support! I'm so proud of this story and I can't help but squeal at all the comments you all are leaving. Angela is definitely a new favorite for MCing. Hopefully the story doesn't wind up feeling rushed later on but for now I like the pacing for the most part. Keep those comments coming and let me know if you think I should add anything or if the pacing starts to feel 'off'.
We talked for several minutes more about the logistics of when and where to have the meeting. Myself and Jasper wanted to get it done and over with as soon as possible, though for differing reasons. He wanted to protect his mate, while I just wanted to have it done and over with so I could return to my studies. I still need to finish my final tome and prepare to summon Lilith, after all.
It was eventually decided that we would wait until the following afternoon. The wolves insisted that they be present since we would most likely be negotiating territory lines and their treaty with the vampires would need to be officially amended to allow for my territory claims. I honestly didn't find the wolves all that much of a threat so I didn't mind extending an invitation to visit every so often. And no, it did not have a thing to do with having half-naked women hanging around!
...I just happen to consider that a bonus.
Armando, unsurprisingly, volunteered to meditate. As my only ally and contact with the supernatural world at large, he decided he would do whatever it took to make sure my sacred lands were not trampled upon. His words, not mine, even if I had begun to feel as if the very earth around me had begun to harmonize to my magickal signature. Apparently, despite relying on my untapped core to cast my magicks, I was still a Witch at heart and when we bonded to a locale, we became very possessive of our sanctuaries.
When talk came to school, we all decided it would be better to skip rather than chance Edward catching any stray thoughts. After a call from Alice to the rest of her coven wherein she explained what she could of the situation without giving away any of my secrets, the Cullen family was on board with the meeting. It was actually surprisingly easy for Alice to convince their coven leader to follow through on letting Alice, Jasper, and Rosalie skip school, as well as acquiesce to keeping Edward and Emmett from searching for them.
She must have noticed my curious gaze since she spoke as soon as she hung up. "I have conditional precognition. When I say something needs to happen a certain way, most of my family have learned not to bet against me."
Rosalie had remained silent during our planning, though every once in a while she'd shoot me a haughty sneer. I didn't bother to acknowledge her, simply smiling at the strange gathering around me. We had all formed a circle sitting on the remaining grassy area just outside the borders of my grandma's wards. Going clockwise, Armando sat to my left, Jasper then Alice and across from them to my right were Samantha and Leah, with Rosalie sitting directly across from me. I was halfway tempted to ask if anyone wanted to roast marshmallows and tell ghost stories.
Eventually, the wolves left to return to their Pack for the night so they could get them all caught up. They would meet us at their treaty line where they usually met the Cullens, Alice and Jasper volunteering to escort us there at the appropriate time the next day. I was tempted to offer them my place to rest at until the next day but Alice preempted me by saying they still need to finish their hunt that was interrupted earlier. She also mentioned they didn't need to sleep so they would probably spend some much-needed alone time 'frolicking' in the woods. Not the imagine I wanted in my head, but judging by the mischievous look in the pixie's golden gaze, she obviously said it on purpose. Gorgeous asshole!
Still, by the time everything was wrapped up, I was feeling pretty damn worn out. This had been one of the most trying days of my life, and I still hadn't even finished becoming a full-fledged Lilitu. Not to mention all the emotional crap that started this whole mess. I had yet to process my mother's betrayals and tomorrow was going to test her resolve about excusing my absence again. If I caught even one whiff of my parents around the school I was going to burn their church to the ground.
"I still think you need to die," came Murder Barbie's voice out of the blue, and I turned after seeing off Alice and Jasper to find the vampire right where I'd left her. "You're a danger to others, even if you think you have control now. You're going to slip up and hurt someone you love. And you'll never forgive yourself."
I frowned as I took a seat across from the guarded woman, Armando returning to the house without question. I suppose he knew I could handle myself at this point. I didn't speak, I simply let my raw energy fill the air around us. Every so often it would coalesce into different bursts of colors before returning to its natural, neutral state.
Finally, after allowing my emotions time to adjust, I spoke. "I am capable of so much destruction, I learned that today. I have had to learn to control a power I never knew existed, on my own, for the last 9 months because my own mother turned her back on her own destiny. I know I'm going to slip up; hell, I've had to resist setting you on fire numerous times while listening to your bitchy comments." She snorted at that, a slight smirk lifting the corners of her lips. "You, of all the Cullens, were the smartest of the bunch, though."
This had the blonde's eyebrows raising imperiously. "While that's true in any sense, what makes you say so?"
"You took the evidence in front of your faces and concluded I was not human. You remained suspicious even when it was just my sexuality that was in question. You disregarded your entire coven's decision to leave me alone to come investigate my oddities." I paused, my energy remaining placid for a moment before flaring to life around us, starbursts of static energy arching from my body into the ground around me. "You were right, of course," I continued, though my voice had begun to echo from every direction. "After only 9 months, I can control forces beyond even your reckoning."
I pulled all of my energy back into my body in an instant, channeling it all into the palm of my right hand. A glowing white orb began to form, shifting through various colors at my whim. "I don't know what happened in your life to make you so distrustful of outsiders, but the way I see it you have three choices: one, be civil-if you can't at least be nice, do not instigate; two, be my friend-I'm new to the supernatural world and the only person I could call myself close to is Armando and I only met him a few days ago."
She raised her brow, dark amber eyes narrowing when I didn't immediately finish. "Let me guess, third option is enemy."
She said it with such confidence that I couldn't help but grin a bit viciously at her, the orb erupting into flames. "Option three: become ash scattered to the four winds. My destiny is beyond vampires and shapeshifters and neither of you will be allowed to stand in my way."
A rather feral growl was my answer, though she didn't move from her seated position. After my earlier demonstration, I highly doubted she would be dumb enough to risk my power again. "That being said," I returned casually, dousing the flames and leaning back on my hands as I stretched lazily, "I do not want a war with your coven, so please choose one of the first two options at your leisure. But the next time you attack, I won't simply bind you." I chuckled darkly as so many images came to mind of what I could do. "No, I will personally tear you limb from limb until only your head remains attached, and only long enough to watch everyone you love burn to ash at your feet."
I stood up suddenly, the blonde staring at the ground as she took in my words. I think she was finally coming to understand the lengths I was willing to go to in order to survive, much the same as her. "All that said, I think we could be powerful allies if you can get that stick out of your ass. So feel free to lounge about out here until it's time for the meetup. I am sorry that you cannot go to your mate, but you'll get to see him tomorrow."
I cut off my rambling as I watched for any sign of movement from Statue Barbie. When she showed no signs of moving or responding, I stepped inside my wards and pulled them up over my cabin, weaving in a silencing spell and a physical deterrent in case anyone got any ideas about other ways to end the contract I had with Alice.
I found Armando in the living area, once again taking his seat from earlier. It was now coming up on midnight, according to the clock that I'd hung on the wall by the kitchen door and I was feeling every minute of it. I fell gracelessly into my grandmother's chair, still feeling the embrace of warm arms surrounding me so many months since I'd first discovered the cabin. It was my only comfort as the events of the day began to overflow down my cheeks, silent sobs wracking my body as I buried my face into my knees.
First I find out I'm a real life Witch whose life and magick was bound to the goddess Lilith, only to be given a single year to learn everything that my own mother should have taught me throughout my life or die by incineration when my magickal core went nova. Now, after three quarters of that time had passed, I had gone from being a normal 'human' girl to a young woman possessing far more power than should seem possible, with a destiny I was no closer to understanding than when I started this journey. I had found my first ally in Armando, but he was no Witch and as such could only guide me so far.
Now, because of a few slip ups and emotional outbursts, I had to make my presence known to the surrounding supernaturals to keep the peace and to keep a vampire alive who had unwittingly bound her life to my secrets. That's not mentioning my unrequited feelings for Isabella Swan whom barely acknowledged my existence nowadays. I just wanted it all to go away. I just wanted to wake up and this cursed life to have been just one horrible nightmare.
But I knew as surely as the dawn would break the horizon tomorrow that all would remain as it is. All of my pain, all of my strife came down to one person, my own mother. My father could be held somewhat accountable for corrupting my mother from her path, but in the end it was my mother who chose to hide my destiny from me.
As my tears ran dry and my eyelids fell heavily into place, I wished above all else that Diane Weber would burn in the fiery abyss she would damn me to.
The sun rose over the horizon, bringing with it a new day and a loud groan from deep in my chest as a vicious migraine rattled around like shards of glass inside my skull. It didn't help that I'd fallen asleep in an awkward position and now my neck felt stiff and sore. I imagine this is what a hangover would feel like, though I had yet to partake of alcohol so I honestly couldn't say. I didn't even know if my Witch metabolism would let me get drunk!
The reminder of my inhuman physiology brought my thoughts to a grinding halt. It wasn't something I had had time to stop and consider and I didn't actually know how different my body was from the humans I resembled. As far as my knowledge of human physiology went from my years of human schooling, I appeared for all the world to be human. From the bipedalism to the symmetrical external features, I never would have guessed that I wasn't human. Unfortunately, I didn't have the means of investigating my internal organs, though now that I thought about it, my mother had never taken me to see a doctor in my life.
Curiosity getting the better of me, I grabbed my grandmother's journal only to find all of its pages now blank. Those truly had been her final words to me, and I couldn't help the few tears that stained those empty pages. I would keep the journal and treasure it, and maybe someday down the line my own mate and I would fill its pages with our own thoughts and feelings to be passed on to our children. But then again, would I ever be willing to put my mate in the same danger my grandma Eleitra had been in by bringing my useless mother into the world?
A question for another day, I supposed as I set the journal aside. It was only then that I realized I was alone in the cabin. I could sense no presence within its walls, though I did detect at least one energy source outside my wards. Did Rosalie really spend the entire night sitting out there?
I decided to take a nice hot shower instead of bothering with thoughts of Nocturnal Barbie, enjoying the spray of heated water massaging the tension out of my muscles after such a long night. I'd had to warm my baths using magick before my electric water heater received power and it was nice to luxuriate in something as simple as a shower without having to concentrate my magick.
After drying off, I took a moment to really look at myself in the mirror. At 6'1" I had always been tall for my gender among the human populous, though until my 17th birthday I had been thin and borderline emaciated despite a healthy diet. Since I had begun exercising and practicing my magicks regularly, my body had gained definition that left me mildly muscular but still with a feminine figure that I would consider attractive if I came across its like in another woman. Or on a certain brunette, I couldn't help my mind turning to Bella. She truly was a beautiful young woman and I wished she would see me the way I saw her. I could only hope that my mate would match up to my first crush because so far I hadn't met Bella's like even with having met the unearthly beauty of Rosalie Hale and those Native goddesses from the reservation.
Aaaand now I'm horny, thanks hormones! That's one thing I still had in common with my human 'cousins' at least. I may be leagues ahead of humans in terms of intellect and capacity for growth, but I'll be damned if I wasn't just as subject to my overactive sexual drive.
Growling in frustration, I left the bathroom naked with nothing but a towel to dry my hair as I headed for my bedroom. A low whistle had me drawing up short as none other than Rosalie Hale sat at my kitchen table, a plate of what looked like tofu-'bacon' and eggs sitting across from her in front of the other chair. "Damn, witchy-bitch, those frumpy clothes you hide behind don't do you justice."
I couldn't help but gape for several reasons. First and foremost, Breaking-and-Entering Barbie had made me breakfast. Secondly, she'd just complemented my body when she was literally perfection wrapped in expensive silk and velvet. And thirdly, I was standing there ass-out naked in front of her and she had yet to look away!
Eventually my brain kicked in and I dropped my hair towel down to cover what was left of my dignity. "Have you heard of fucking knocking, or do you make it as habit to break into people's homes?!"
She simply raised one of those perfectly sculpted eyebrows in that sneering way of hers. "Well, if you'd stop to think for a second about anything other than giving me a lovely peep-show, you'd realize I wouldn't have been able to get past your magick or whatever without help." She gestured towards the door before leaning back in her chair. "Armando kept me company last night after you'd fallen asleep-apparently his kind don't need sleep, but they do need to 'recharge for a few hours among nature,' whatever that means. When he told me you were waking up he asked me to see to it that you ate something before our big meetup today while he gathered some paperwork."
Finally I managed to shake the cobwebs out of my brain, realizing Armando must have been able to pull Rosalie through my wards. And the only way that would be possible was if the blonde truly held no malicious intent towards me. Sighing, I turned and continued through the door to my bedroom without a backwards glance. I didn't have time for Bipolar Barbie and her overnight change in attitude towards me.
After getting dressed in a pair faded jeans and a long-sleeve crème colored sweater, I eventually forced myself to return to the kitchenette, taking a seat in front of the plate. "This isn't poisoned is it?" I asked, not because I actually thought it might be but wanting to annoy the blonde as much as possible. A kind Rosalie was just weird.
The blonde harrumphed before crossing her arms beneath her breasts, which I totally didn't stare at. Eye-contact, you stupid horny Witch! "Would I even be here if I was thinking of killing you? Oh, and my eyes are a little farther north."
I blinked, feeling my face flush as I realized I'd lost my battle of will versus horny and had, in fact, been staring very intently at her glorious tits. Then I realized she had been purposefully pushing them up with her arms and I glared at the smirking woman. "Ha ha, very funny. Let's all make fun of the useless lesbian who can't get laid until after her 18th birthday."
A foreign and out of place sound came from the blonde, and if I were hearing correctly, Rosalie Hale just...giggled. She seemed to realize it moments later as her eyes narrowed dangerously in my direction. "Say a word of this and I'll-" her words choked off suddenly, her eyes widening.
"Yeah," I chuckled casually as I tucked into the surprisingly good breakfast, "You can't threaten a Witch in her own home, our magick naturally protects against ill intent. So I guess there goes more than half of our conversation pieces."
Her glare was back, though it was much less intense than it had been last night. "Fine," she eventually grumbled after a few seconds, "then how about you explain that cryptic 'getting laid' statement instead?"
I took my time chewing my food as I considered what all I could afford to tell her. They already knew I was a Witch, but the three vampires didn't seem bothered by it. After learning of our history and what my clan had done to the Volturi, I had expected a lot more hostility from Alice and Jasper towards Witches...Rosalie excluded because I think 'hostile' was just her default at this point.
Still, could I risk giving away my relation to the Order? Would Rosalie even understand the importance of the Familiar pairing?
In the end, I realized it didn't matter much to me. I was tired of hiding and I was pretty sure Rosalie's presence in my home meant she'd chosen option two, so I decided to go with it. "I'm not an ordinary Witch," I began, trying to choose my words carefully. "As you've probably noticed, I'm quite powerful but that has to do with the source of my power. Without going into too much detail, on the night of my 18th birthday, I will have to call on a higher power who will release the soul of one of her children into the world to find a suitable body to inhabit. I will have until the next full moon to find this person and perform the bonding ritual to tie our souls together. Otherwise, I go up in flames."
I watched as Rosalie's face slowly went slack during my explanation. "So, much like us vampires, you won't even know who your mate is until you meet them?"
I nodded, then shrugged. "I can only hope it's someone understanding and not just some random woman I have nothing in common with. At least you vampires get that guarantee."
"I wouldn't know," was Rosalie's immediate response, my brows disappearing into my hairline.
"But aren't you and Emmett..."
She looked away off to the side, refusing to meet my gaze. "I thought we were mates when he was first turned. I found him as a human being mauled by a bear, and after I killed the bear, I couldn't just leave him there. Something about him reminded me so much of my human best friend's son. So I took him to Carlisle to have him turned since I wasn't sure I could do the deed myself-I've never once tasted human blood and I never want to."
She sighed, her rigid shoulders falling as she slumped back in her chair. "It was definitely love at first sight, but it wasn't a mate-bond connection as I had originally thought. It took me a while to realize what drew me to him. He was a reminder of Vera...the only woman I ever loved."
I choked on my next bite, beating at my chest to clear my airways before taking a healthy drink of water from the nearby glass she had set out for me. Rosalie was smirking by the time I got my breathing under control. "What?" she asked teasingly, "You and Alice aren't the only ones capable of appreciating women. That being said, if any of this gets out..." she let her voice taper off voluntarily rather than getting tongue tied behind a threat.
"Like I'm one to out someone," I waved her concern off, taking my empty plate and cup to the sink and swirling my hand above them. Water from the tap began to buffet the dishes before a sharp jerk of my hand sent the excess down the drain, leaving the plate and silverware clean and dry. I was putting them away when I realized how quiet the vampire had gone, turning to find Rosalie staring open-mouthed in my direction.
"I swear," I chided teasingly, "I incinerated a bunch of trees and flung your ass several miles across the forest, but me doing the dishes is what gets the look of awe?"
Her mouth snapped shut, that familiar glare back in her amber eyes. "I can literally bench-press your cabin and can run faster than most sports cars, but even I've never seen magic up close and personal, save for your light show last night."
Her caustic words had my smirk falling into a gentle smile. "Sorry," I said lightly, "magick is second-nature to me now so I forget that to outsiders it can be a bit strange." Staring at the odd vampire in front of me, I couldn't help but wonder at her contradicting personalities I'd seen so far.
She was fierce, protective, and overbearingly dominant, yet the gentleness I saw in her eyes as she spoke of Vera and the woman's son, and the fact that she saved Emmett from the brink of death, showed such a depth of love and compassion...it was beautiful.
A flick of my wrist and a pulse of natural energy had the bud of a light-red flower bursting to life in my palm. I closed the small distance between myself and the blonde, extending the slowly blooming flower to Rosalie. She stared at the flower for the longest time before slowly plucking it from my palm, a curious softness entering her soulful eyes.
"You wouldn't believe how many roses I've received in my life," she whispered into the sudden silence. "Never once did anyone think of me as more than my name: beautiful, but bearing thorns that prick and bleed you out. I've never been more than a pretty face to be shown off, then discarded when my use had faded."
The sudden sheen of tears were unexpected, though even Rosalie somehow made crying look beautiful. "Do you know what this flower represents?" I asked gently, careful of this tentative peace that was growing between us.
She shook her head, though her gaze never wavered from the flower whose petals fluttered in an artificial breeze of my making.
Smiling, I leaned down and took the flower by its stem and slowly began weaving my magic around the vampire's golden hair, settling the flower to rest comfortably over her left ear. "It's called Amaryllis. It can be used to mean splendid beauty," I noticed Rosalie flinch at the definition as I rose back to my full height. "But I much prefer its other meaning: worth beyond beauty."
Her eyes jumped from the table where they'd been resting up to meet mine, and for a moment we shared a kindred smile. There was so much more to this woman than meets the eye, and I really wanted to count her as a friend. "So," I cleared my throat before returning to my seat across from her, "Option two?"
An honest to goddess smile lifted the corners of her lips and I think my heart stopped for a moment as she sat back in her chair. "I think I'd like that. I haven't spoken this openly with anyone in decades. I think that says a lot about you, considering I've never told a soul about Vera."
I nodded and held my hand out across the table. "Angela Lockwell, resident neophyte Witch and useless lesbian."
Rosalie smirked in response and reached out to take my hand firmly in hers. "Rosalie Lillian Hale, resident vampire enforcer and just as useless bisexual."
We both laughed, this relaxed sound that was both freedom and contentment. Admittedly, she did try to break my hand with her grip, but I had already put a magickal barrier between our hands so she was basically squeezing air and getting nowhere.
Judging by her signature glare, she didn't appreciate my taunting grin. "In a fair fight, I'd crush you under my stilettos."
I raised an eyebrow, shooting her as teasing grin. "I didn't know you were giving out rewards." She rolled her eyes with as heavy put-upon sigh, mumbling something about 'useless lesbian'. "That being said, in a fair fight, a stiff wind could take me out faster than a flat surface could take out Bella Swan."
That was apparently the last straw as the blonde burst into the most beautiful laughter I'd ever heard, and I swear I blanked out for a moment because a split second later a flash went off nearby making me hiss and shield my eyes. I had a spell on the tips of my fingers before I recognized the cackling laughter of Alice Cullen. I opened my eyes with just enough time to catch Rosalie giving chase as the pixie disappeared through the front door into the woods.
"You delete that right now or I'm destroying your entire wardrobe!" It was only my enhanced senses that let me overhear the rapidly fading voices of Rosalie and Alice.
Alice's cackle continued into the distance and I couldn't help but roll my eyes as both Jasper and Armando stood to either side of the doorway. "Worth it!"
I looked at Jasper who was sporting a relaxed smile for once. "Let the little pixiepire know I expect a copy of that picture." His smile widened into a grin, and yeah, their whole family are gorgeous.
Tipping his non-existent hat, Jasper gestured to the doorway. "Since those two obviously have a headstart on us, I suggest we get a move on." He paused as I grabbed my purse from the kitchen counter, pulling out my car keys. "I apologize, we probably should have mentioned that we go to the meeting point on foot. It is quite the hike for a human."
I rolled my eyes and dropped my keys back into my purse, securing the strap across my shoulder. I slipped on a pair of black hiking boots that I'd gotten recently when I realized the area I lived in wasn't suited for walking around in sneakers. When we got outside, I drew up my energy and let it fill my body with strength. This was one enhancement spell I hadn't yet needed to use, so putting it to the test against a vampire was either going to be fun or disastrous.
Scenting the air, I easily caught Alice and Rosalie's sweet scents. Grinning, I planted my feet and tossed over my shoulder to Jasper, "Race ya!"
And with a mighty push, I felt my body soaring through the air, my feet instinctually moving against the earth. Ok, so strength is definitely overpowered, but it took all of my focus to keep myself from crashing through trees or tripping over interspersed roots hidden beneath underbrush. I was going to need a lot more practice before I was ready to race anyone, let alone survive without debilitating bodily injury. I quickly concluded that if I continued in this manner I might end up with a broken neck, so instead I let my energy surround my body just as Jasper caught up with me, a smirk barely noticeable on his handsome face as I struggled to keep focused.
As soon as I reached the next outcropping of large roots, I landed on them in a crouch, kicking off with every bit of strength I had. This time I really did go soaring, as I let my energy suffuse my every cell with the same energy I used to levitate objects. 'Light as a feather, stiff as a board' it is!
I had made myself weightless, while using kinetic energy to propel my body forward, an exhilarated laugh bubbling up as I began to weave myself between the trees as they continued to fly by me. I was fucking flying! I take back every negative thing I said about magick. I was flying through the forest as if I'd been born with wings! I was magnificent! I was powerful! I was-
-lost.
Shit, I had gotten so caught up in my excitement at spellcrafting a new form of magick that I had completely lost the vampires' trails. Now I was flying along in what I hoped was the right direction, searching for any illusive scent I might recognize. I still didn't know how I had lost the vampire in the first place, nor do I know what became of Armando for that matter. Shit, I was such a shitty friend!
After five minutes of finding nothing, I decided to instead fly up above the canopy of trees and search for the river I'd been told split the territory line.
The moment I broke through to the open air, I once again found myself in awe. While the perpetual cloud coverage blotted out the sun's rays, it did nothing to diminish the majesty of the Olympic Peninsula. It was breathtaking and I soon realized that this was my realm. Not just my own sanctuary, but the entirety of the natural world in this corner of the US. I was going to need to talk to Armando about this feeling because I wasn't sure I would ever be ready to accept this much responsibility.
Eventually I turned my mind back to the task at hand. A quick glance found the river cutting a swath through the forest, and I quickly set off in that direction. It wasn't long before I began to hear voices over the sounds of wind. Or, I should say, one voice in particular and not one I ever enjoyed hearing.
"We're here," Edward practically growled, his voice still somehow managing to sound petulant and menacing at the same time. "What do you want?"
I was about a mile away when Edward really started his bitching. "Why the hell isn't anyone answering me?! And why are most of you thinking about sex?! What the hell is an Amaryllis?!"
I decided then and there to have a little fun. They were all trying so hard to keep my secrets that I just had to put on a show. I pulled my cloaking magick over myself as I closed in on the gathered supernaturals, taking stock. I could see several wolves on one side, with only Leah and Samantha in their human forms. On the other side were the vampires, with Carlisle and his wife, Esme standing out front with Edward next to them. Emmett was to their right, looking oddly sullen with Alice, Jasper, and Rosalie off a little ways to the left. I could see Alice's hand gripping Jasper's ass and damn near fell out of the sky, but what really almost did me in was watching the little pixie also cupping Rosalie's ass, who swatted at her playfully. I was late to the show, apparently, but at least I would be able to make an entrance.
"Edward," Carlisle finally decided to reign in his son, "You know we're not to ask questions until this new person arrives. Alice explained this when we arrived so please have some patience."
I brought myself in to hover around twenty feet above the ground, my magick actually beginning to strain at my continued use of such powerful energy. I was going to be practicing this new skill in the near future, for sure.
I allowed a gust of wind to blast downward, stirring up a dramatic little cloud of dust as I lowered into a soft landing. With a wave of my hand, I released all of my magicks at once, a burst of wind clearing the air for the big reveal. Unfortunately, I hadn't taken the time to think of what I was going to say, so I really can't be blamed for what came out of my mouth next.
"Ta-da?"