I have come to the realization that I never explained the semi in semi-SI. So I claim SI because I would thoroughly enjoy fucking with people and love making use of things that are already in the setting. Semi though, because I'm a lazy bastard and wouldn't get off my ass unless the plot demanded I did so with promises of payment. I'm also not as mentally ill as the Mc here.

I do not own Konosuba or Touhou. They belong to their respective owners that I am too lazy to look up right now. Except ZUN, but that's because he's a homie for letting people basically do whatever with Touhou.

My Discord is discord. gg/9ah46GFzbn

Lunacy Everywhere!

I found a problem with having a giant mech in my backyard. Every adventurer and citizen within a hundred mile radius decided that my home was now a tourist attraction. Fun fact, it isn't. I was once again glad that I have a battalion of possessed dolls that dislike humans. People learned that trespassing on my property was a bad idea after the first group returned without any of their belongings.

In other news, I now have more stuff. Granted, none of it fit me, but it was the principle of the matter. I now had clothes beyond just what I was wearing. I would have to go to the tailor to get them fitted but that could come later. Right now, I am teaching the dolls danmaku. Some got it pretty easily, but others still were having some issues. I was thinking of giving those without talent in magic some mini lances or knives so they could still fight. I wasn't even forcing them to fight, they actually wanted to help me.

Teaching time was interrupted by knocking on the door. I heavily disliked being interrupted. So did the dolls. I ignored the knocking and continued teaching only for the person to knock again. Now thoroughly annoyed I had only one path ahead of me. I would answer the door and give the person on the other side a piece of my mind. I walked over to the door, the dolls following behind me, some walking, some flying, and one perched on top of my head. Upon opening the door I was met with someone's stomach. Once again, I curse my below average height.

The person at the door was wearing a sort of blue suit and was looking at the doorway in confusion.

"Down here."

She glanced down to my glaring eyes and the large mass of dolls that seemed less than happy at her intrusion. She seemed to mentally collect herself before speaking.

"I am Sena, one of the Royal Prosecutors. I am here for one, Reisen Udongein Inaba."

I looked up at her and tilted my head, "Am I in trouble?"

Sena looked taken aback before seemingly realizing what the situation looked like. "No, quite the opposite in fact. The Royal Family would like you to keep up the good work and to move to the front line soon."

I hummed in thought. The front lines would be more work, but the mech could basically just march up to the demon king and kill him as is, not to mention all of the fun wave powers. I could theoretically create a nuclear explosion with them if I had enough uranium 235 and a metal box. Of course, with the way the Lunatic Mage class was going, I would just get a spell that would do that eventually.

"I'll think about going to the front lines, I'm pretty sure a demon king general is heading here so I'd like to deal with him first."

"How would you know that?"

"Well you see here," I said, trying to think of a piece of technically true bullshit that sounds good. "Since one of the Demon King Generals was here in the first place, maybe another will come now that the first one died."

Sena seemed to take my words into consideration, before nodding, "Yes, I can see the sense in that. Very well, I'll alert the royal knights to the possibility of another Demon King General in the vicinity of Axel."

"Thanks, have a good day, lonely virgin lady."

Sena stiffened before robotically nodding and walking away. I cackled as I closed the door behind her. The dolls also gave their own cackles, making the entire mansion sound like a psych ward from the 1900s. Now I just had to wait for Vanir to appear and do Vanir things.

I hummed to myself as I walked over to the magic shop of Wiz. I had some wonderful ideas but they required some rather volatile things. Things like potions that explode when they are opened. I threw open the door and proclaimed my existence to the shop.

"Hello there Wiz! I am here to purchase items!"

Wiz looked up from the friendship crystal and turned to me. It appears things are happening out of order in this version of the world, possibly due to my own interference. It was a shame, truely, that I didn't care. Megumin and Yunyun were doing the crystal thing while everyone else was watching.

"Reisen, welcome back, what can I get you."

I smiled widely, "Remember those explosive potion bottles? I'll take your entire stock."

Wiz seemed to light up at the prospect of a person buying items from her. "Sure, let me get them for you!"

As Wiz hurried off to get the explosives, Aqua leaned down to whisper in my ear, "You know she's a lich right? A filthy undead unfit to have a shop."

I nodded, "Of course I knew she was undead, I'm not stupid. She's a pretty good undead though, and I wouldn't call her filthy either."

Aqua looked disappointed in me. Probably because I was fine with an undead. Wiz came back with a large crate full of explosive goodies. She gently put the crate on a table and huffed.

"How much do I owe you Wiz?"

"Ah, 500,000 eris"

Aqua looked visibly pained at the thought of an undead having more money than her but restrained herself. Wiz, the bundle of sunshine she was, gave me a low price. A crate full of potions was about 500 of the bastards. Considering a grenade from the USA was about 45 USD, I was basically getting grenades at 10 bucks a pop. I smiled dangerously at the crate before giving a loud whistle. Several dolls flew through the door before cackling and taking the crate away.

"Ah, all according to plan."

Kazuma and Megumin looked more than a little scared because it was a known fact that they were on my shit list for blowing me up once. Aqua was oblivious to the danger she was in and darkness had a slightly lewd look. Yunyun didn't seem to know how to react to me, which was fine. I wanted to make the first move anyway.

"Ah, where are my manners person whose name I don't know. I am Reisen Udongein Inaba, a Lunar Rabbit and Lunatic Mage. Who might you be friend?"

This entire sentence was planned. I made it seem a bit grandiose so I would seem friendly. The race and class were there to spark some intrigue, and calling her friend, as a person who is starved for friends, is basically guaranteed to make her latch onto me. Finally, after so long, I will have my first party member. Perhaps even my first human friend? Eh, we'll see.

"HE-hello, I'm Y-Yunyun. Pleased t-to meet you."

Waifu, GET. Considering all of the mayhem that was yet to happen, I would be going to Keeles dungeon. For… reasons.

"Well, It's been nice meeting you Yunyun, but I must be off, my chaos quota hasn't been met today."

"B-bye Reisen!"

Walking out of the shop, I proceeded to head out to the dungeon that Keele lived in. It would be great fun to steal all of his shinies and perhaps even release him from the burdens of existing.

Something the anime never really mentioned was how fucking far away the dungeon was. It took most of the day and by the time I made it the sun was already down. Deciding that it would be better to just get things over with, I walked into the dungeon. It was actually pretty quiet. There were a few demons here and there, but they were lesser beings, barely even able to detect me before being killed by a Lunar Ray. Making my way farther into the place I used my Lunatic Eyes to see in the dark. I eventually found where Keele would apparently be hiding. It was behind a wall that no longer existed due to the usage of Lunar Blast. Walking into the room, it seemed that Keele really wasn't expecting me to enter his room.

"Huh, you're the second lich I've met. Nice to meet ya."

Keele had a few seconds of reboot time before realizing that he was simply staring at me. "Hoh! It seems that you have found me adventurer. Now tell me, who was the other lich you met?"

"Hm? Oh you mean Wiz? She's a really great person, runs a shop and everything."

"Oh… it appears I have misjudged you, tell me will you listen to my story?"

"Sure thing."

"And with that, I am stuck here forever until a powerful enough cleric comes around to purify me."

His story took way too long to be told. Granted, it was a good story, I would totally make it a book.

"So what kinds of magic would purify you? Only holy, or would something like fire magic also work?"

"I'm afraid that only holy magic would work, any other magic would make me be reborn here at my phylactery."

"Cool, cool. So I know a really powerful but dumb arch-priest. Do you wanna come with me to her or should I send her down here?"

Keele seemed to contemplate his options for a second before deciding. "I'll come with you, just give me a second to grab my phylactery so it can be destroyed with me."

"Sweet, come Keele! The afterlife awaits you!"

I really hate walking. This dungeon is not difficult because of its traps or monsters, but because of how far it is from Axel. It was actually pretty easy to smuggle Keele into the town. The guards barely pay attention and don't care if you are a high enough level. Getting Keele to Aqua was another problem. Aqua seemed to have disappeared. So I am now wandering around town to all of the different bars with an ancient lich.

Aqua, it seems, was being a lazy shit and was asleep in the stables. Finally finding her brought other problems. Namely the ancient lich.

"WAH! Why is there a lich with you Reisen? Are you serving the Demon King?"

"Fucking finnaly! Keele, this is the high powered arch-priest I was telling you about. Now Aqua, Purify him or I swear to all that is unholy I will find a way to make all alcohol in the world into water."

"AAAAHHHH! OK! OK! One purification, coming up!"

SACRED PURIFICATION

"There, all done."

"Thank you, now I'm going to go and cause more chaos elsewhere."

I turned and walked away, thinking that that was the end of that. Spoiler: it wasn't. Waking up the next day to Sena knocking on my door again was fun, for all of ten seconds before she tried to arrest me. Tried, being the key word.

The knocking was incessant and loud. Someone really needs to learn manners and not wake me up before 10 in the morning. Walking down to the door while still in sleep wear I open the door to see Sena again.

"Oh, hello virgin. I have a question, well two questions. The first, is when am I getting paid for killing that one bitch."

"Ah, well that'll depend on how today goes. What's the other question?" Sena said, seemingly annoyed at me.

"Why are you waking me up at the ass crack of dawn? I need to sleep, damn it."

"The reason I am waking you is because you are under arrest."

I looked at her for a solid amount of time before speaking. "What for?"

Sena seemed confused for a second before glaring. "You know what for."

"No, I don't, I wouldn't be asking if I did."

"You should know."

"Let's pretend I don't know why," I said, getting sick of Sena's shit.

"You brought a lich into town yesterday. That's illegal and dangerous."

"Who told you that?"

"The arch-priest Aqua."

I sighed. "Is it illegal to get a lich to a high powered arch-priest so they could kill it?"

Sena seemed a bit put out but answered anyway. "Yes, bringing a monster into a city without a permit is illegal."

"Ok, so is it ok to bring a person who is cursed into town."

"Yes, why wouldn't it be?"

"So, I brought a person, who cursed themselves into a lich and brought them into the town so they could be purified."

"That isn't how that works."

"Well your laws contradict each other and your country is stupid."

"Wha-"

"I rest my case," I said, closing the door in her face. Again.

"You are still under arrest, you little shit!"

"Yeah? You and what army? If I really wanted to destroy the city I would just hop into the mobile fortress destroyer and start blasting."

"Ugh, you do have a point. I'll be back after some investigations. In the meantime I ask that you let me hold onto the destroyer."

"How on this lunatic filled world are you going to move the destroyer?"

Sena sighed before just leaving. Mission accomplished. Now I wouldn't be arrested. I decided that to ensure I don't get arrested, it's time to commit just a little bit of terrorism. I think there was a noble in the area who summoned a demon. His name started with an A if I remember correctly. Anyways, I think I'll blow up his manor or something with some explosive potions. Indirectly so I can get away from it. So basically I'll leave the potions around his manor and his staff will activate them. That way the wording of what I say can trick the lie detector bell, because really, I don't want to get arrested.

Walking to a storage room, I had some of the dolls grab 5 potions for testing purposes. Through the sophisticated mechanism of throwing the bottle and hoping it doesn't blow up in my face, I found that the explosives were more concussive explosives than actual explosives that would do structural damage to anything other than glass. Which means I would need a new plan. Lovely.

My new plan was simple, but had many ways it could go wrong. The first problem was going to be finding a dragon. The second problem would be getting the dragon over to the estate. I had the plan for getting the dragon to the location I wanted it, but finding one was a different issue altogether. Sure, I could check the quest board but then…

I'm stupid. So I could go to the quest board, find a quest with a dragon in it, but pick up a different quest. Get the dragon and do the noble plan of destruction, do the quest I picked up, and then be home free. The destruction of a noble's place of residence would make a whole new investigation that would occupy Sena and give me more time to disappear and do… stuff.

I also came to the conclusion that I really don't want to make connections while I am here. Sure, it would be great, but I'm not sure that I could take them with me if I went elsewhere after murdering the demon king. Alternatively, if some people I know want to begin anew in a different world… This would take some thought. In the meantime, I need to execute this plan.