A/N: It's been almost two years since I last updated this story. We're not going to discuss why. Life gets chaotic. What more can I say? This chapter is ready though, and I hope all of you enjoy it. Best wishes and God bless you all!
Disclaimer: We don't have time for this today. Ya'll know this is merely Fanfiction. Support the official release and blah blah blah.
Warnings: Can't think of anything major I need to warn you guys about. Besides, warning you ruins the surprises. Have fun honeychildren. Have fun!
We're Broke! Please Give Us Money!
-4-
In the previous installment of this ridiculous mess of a tale from almost two years ago, we left our unfortunate protagonists in the middle of quite a pickle, as humans would have said in ages past. For those unfamiliar with the phrase, here's the long and short of it all:
YoRHa Units 2B and 9S are pretty much destined to die at the hands of…well tentacles of would be more accurate...a massive, vengeful mutation of what should have been a rather large octopus. Henceforth, we shall refer to it as the Demon Fish...because that's essentially what it is.
At any rate, 9S was still dangling upside down with the tentacles of the Demon Fish swinging him back and forth like a pendulum on a clock. The Scanner had relaxed considerably due to accepting what was soon to be a grim fate. In fact, he was internally groaning because the deplorable Demon Fish was too busy laughing maniacally at 2B as she sat along the pavement far below, holding back sobs from having failed in her feeble attempt to save him. Virtuous Contract was long gone, and 9S knew for a fact that the sword was her prized possession, not just because it was a beautiful weapon but because YoRHa B-models were capable of transferring memory data into their primary weapon in an emergency.
This was most definitely an emergency and 2B's primary weapon was certainly at the bottom of the ocean by now.
9S knew 2B didn't back up her own memory very often. He wasn't sure of the reason, and he had never been able to work up the nerve to broach the topic to her.
Frankly, something in his internal systems told him he wouldn't have liked the answer anyway.
Though worried about the prospect of 2Bs losing most of her memories, it wasn't as if 9S could actually do anything about their current predicament. He was dangling upside down after all.
Our favorite Scanner model was at the mercy of the Demon Fish...who just kept on laughing like it had all the time in the world to draw out their suffering.
Considering they've been in limbo for nearly two years in our world, it's safe to say the suffering has been drawn out for long enough.
Groaning internally, 9S realizes he's getting lightheaded from the artificial blood rushing to his skull.
"Gonna pass out soon," he observes, stifling a yawn as error messages pop up on his visual feed. The edges of it skitter slightly, but he can still see well enough.
"At least I won't feel anything whenever this thing finally decides to eat me. Wish it would hurry up though. I'd like to wake up in a new body and forget this embarrassment."
Pods 042 and 153 hover in the air a safe distance away, surveying the scene with mechanical processes registering to them as "terror". However, this changes when 153 receives an incoming communication notice from the Bunker.
"Deactivating Self-Preservation Mode." With a low hum the Pod quickly floats toward 9S' dangling form.
042 watches 153 go. Something akin to a whimper escapes him.
"There goes the bravest soul I have ever known."
153 appears before 9S seconds later, completely unaware of 042's serenading swansong echoing out behind her. The Scanner responds with an irritated moan while the Demon Fish laughs some more, its tentacles swinging him back and forth lazily.
"Hey...153..." he began, talking only when the pod was directly in front of his face. "Or should I..."
Swing
"...call you..."
Swing
"...Traitor..."
Swing
"...instead?"
"Incoming communication for Unit 9S."
9S moans again then waits for his pod to line up with his visual sensors.
"Patch them through..."
Swing
"...and send a distress signal..."
Swing
"...for crying out loud!"
"Affirmative."
Within seconds, 9S catches a glimpse of 21O on his HUD screen.
"Unit 9S this is your regularly scheduled..." the Operator trails off, visibly twitching at what she sees on her screen.
"Yo!" The Scanner greets his Operator with an easy smile, eerily calm at this point. "What's up?"
21O blinks once, gaping quite comically at the Demon Fish taking up the background behind her assigned unit.
"9S! WHAT IS THAT!?"
"Wow, Operator. I've never heard you..."
Swing
"...freak out like this before."
Back on the Bunker, Commander White and all the other Operators turned and stared at 21O. Out of all of them, 21O was the least prone to emotional outbursts such as this. If she was screaming at the top of her lungs...and boy was she ever...
"IT'S SO HUGE! IT'S SO FREAKIN' HUGE! WHY! WHY IS IT SO BIG!?"
Then something is definitely amiss on Earth.
Seconds after 21O's initial screaming, the Bunker receives the distress signal along with a large visual feed to accompany it on the main operating screen. Audible gasps erupt from every Operator present, and 6O is quick to start initiating a communication link with 2B.
Commander White, composed yet disturbed if her expression is any indicator, stares up at the creature on the main screen. With a deepening scowl she takes notice of something quite strange in the background of the debacle 2B and 9S were currently entangled in. Yes, a large vessel was approaching the Demon Fish from behind, and while it was hard to see exactly what was on it, the Commander had a feeling YoRHa would gain important intel from this misadventure unfolding before them.
"Commander!"
The stern woman pivots on her heel to fix her gaze on 21O at her Operator station.
"I request your order to deploy special forces to engage with...that Demon Fish!" 21O states, struggling to regain her composure.
"Negative," she answers, glancing back at the screen. "Units 2B and 9S will have reinforcements soon enough." She points her baton at the incoming ship along the waters on the screen. "To all the Operators present, halt progress on your current missions to run diagnostics on this vessel approaching the Flooded City."
Due to 21O's frazzled state, the communication line was still open, which meant 9S heard everything.
But before he could even begin to question what the Commander could possibly be talking about; he notes the sudden lack of laughter from the Demon Fish.
"STOP IT! STOP IT!" 2B shouts up from the ground. "Leave 9S alone!"
"Hahahahaha! I think I've prolonged his suffering for long enough. Don't worry little girl, you won't have to live in this world without your precious love!"
9S chuckles sardonically at that. "I know 2B cares about me as her comrade...but in terms of love? I'm pretty sure that's just a one-sided affair..."
"NINES!"
The cry of his nickname is a blood-curdling sound that tears through the core of 9S' mechanical heart. As the tentacles around his legs lift him up higher, he manages to catch sight of the combat model...the broken soldier he had loved throughout countless lifetimes he had no memory of.
Her body trembles violently from the sobs still wracking through her body, and 9S nearly loses his breath in shock from the depth of emotion she displays.
"2B..."
With heaving gasps, the combat model crawls forward, summoning Virtuous Treaty.
"Let him..."
Another tentacle whips 2B across her stomach, sending her back into the concrete. Virtuous Treaty clatters to the ground next to her. When she makes her next attempt to stand, that same tentacle viciously slaps her face.
"Stop it!" 9S shouts, struggling against the tentacles around his ankles. "Don't touch her!"
The creature pays the Scanner no mind. It merely keeps laughing as the black-out visor all YoRHa are required to wear slips halfway down 2B's face, revealing one of her ice-blue eyes.
9S could see from her stare, unseeing as it was, that she wanted nothing more than to save him.
Her care for him wasn't merely platonic comradery.
She felt something more...for him.
"I can die happily knowing that much," he thinks, smiling bitterly.
A part of him wonders how many times he's had that thought before now.
His pondering halts when his view of 2B becomes blocked by the open mouth of the large octopus. Its razor-sharp teeth glitter in the dim sunlight, promising an excruciating death.
With all hope lost, the two YoRHa Units never would have expected the crazy miracle that swooped in to save the day at the last second.
"YEEEEE HAAAAAAW!"
With a strange, fearsome wail, a human-shaped figure meets 9S' eyes. Flipping through the air, the mysterious person withdraws a familiar sword and slashes at the tentacles around his ankles, freeing him from the deathly grip of the Demon Fish!
"AAAAAAAAAH!"
Gripping the collar of his uniform firmly, the savior flings 9S toward 2B screaming, "Catch him if you can!"
Though 2B's visual feed was still damaged, she was able to perceive a distinct blob falling towards her. Dashing to her feet at lightning speed, the combat model extends her arms out and braces for the impact of her partner's weight against her body.
"Ooof!"
Her knees give out the instant she locks her arms around him.
"He's safe...he's safe..."
Meanwhile, after flying through the sky in a show of fancy acrobatics, the mysterious savior lands a few paces away from the YoRHa operatives. Low chuckles from the warrior are drowned out by the screeching wails of the Demon Fish.
"CURSED HUMAN! YOU WILL REGRET..."
"I'm afraid you're mistaken," the savior exclaims boldly, grinning wickedly as she slowly slashes the air in front of her with Virtuous Contract.
Following that singular motion, cannon fire erupts through the air. The artillery slams against the back of the Demon Fish, eliciting a sharp hiss from it as a chorus of mechanical voices join the explosions of earth-shattering noise.
"YO HO! YO HO! A PIRATE'S LIFE FOR ME!"
As the chanting grew, so too did the amount of cannon fire. A few of them whizzed by the savior and the broken YoRHa duo embracing each other.
"9S, are you alright?"
"Yeah," he murmurs, not sure if 2B can hear him over the cannon fire and the Demon Fish's screeching.
"YO HO! YO HO! A PIRATE'S LIFE FOR ME!"
There was also the mechanical chanting, which their savior didn't seem to be pleased by.
"YOU GUYS CAN SING BETTER THAN THAT! COME ON! SCREAM THOSE LYRICS LIKE YOU MEAN IT OR SING SOMETHING ELSE!"
9S sighs. "2B..."
"Hmmm..."
"I think I wanna go home now."
2B nods, blinking the static out of her vision. "Me too. But before that, do you think you can hack in and fix my visual feed? We might have a hard time getting out of here otherwise."
With slow movements, 9S pries himself out of 2B's arms. He immediately feels cold at the lack of contact but ignores the troubling sensation in favor of activating his hacking prompt. 2B quickly disables her internal defensive systems as she usually did whenever he activated the prompt for maintenance purposes.
"I'm only going in for a minute or so," he reassures, taking a quick glance behind him. The Demon Fish's wails were beginning to falter, but the mechanical singing was getting...well...
"WHEN YOU WALK AWAY
YOU DON'T HEAR ME SAY
PLEEEEEEEASE...OH BABY!
DON'T GO!"
"THAT'S THE WAY MEN! NOW YOU SOUND LIKE A CREW I CAN BE PROUD OF!"
"Weirdest day of my life," 9S muses, returning his focus to the task at hand. With a final warning to 2B, he dives into the hacking space and quickly makes his way to 2B's visual settings. He switches off all the visual sensors for a few seconds then initiates a reboot sequence. While waiting for the hacking space to register the change, he runs a quick diagnostic check on 2B's other internal systems. Noting how her balance parameters are severely off-kilter, he quickly goes about fixing that as well.
Once through with all the necessary maintenance, he extracts himself from the hacking space and examines 2B's face. By now her visor had completely fallen away from her face, but her eyes are closed.
For a split second he reaches up with his hand, tempted to touch the dried streaks of water just beneath her eyelids.
"You should be okay now," he whispers after a moment, dropping his hand before stumbling to his feet to take up a defensive stance in front of his comrade. Ahead of him, the Demon Fish sinks into the sea in a rather anti-climactic manner, mainly because the authoress doesn't feel like writing a long, drawn-out action scene.
Her rebuttal to any complaints about this are along the lines of, "It's almost been two years since this story has been touched. I don't care. Hush!"
Of course, 9S, completely unaware of the crazy lady piloting this ridiculousness, widens his stance in anticipation of another fight. A large vessel was beginning to dock on the shoreline nearby, and the thing was absolutely filled to the brim with machine lifeforms...
"Why are they still singing?"
"SIMPLE AND CLEAN IS THE WAY THAT YOU'RE MAKING ME FEEL...TONIGHT!"
"My auditory systems are not happy right now," 2B mutters in a low moan 9S can't help but chuckle at. With a smile he glances at her briefly, hoping to catch a glimpse of her eyes before she covers them with her visor again.
Unfortunately…
"Sorry to break up this little love spell you two have got going, but I do believe some thanks are in order, yes?"
Tensing slightly, the two YoRHa Units face the humanoid figure before them, unsure of whether to think of them as a friend or a foe as they approach.
Wearing black, high-heeled steel-toed boots, fitted black pants with crimson and gold patches sown into the fabric in stylistic patterns, a tailored, long-sleeved blouse with ruffles around the collar and sleeves, an eye-patch over her right eye, an assortment of rings glittering with several rare gemstones along her fingers, and a classic black pirate's hat atop a head of white, wavy mid-length hair, the woman before them was certainly an odd sight to behold.
Her ruby red lips spread out into a wide grin at their silence as her single green eye narrows.
"Forgive me," she says, her movements slow and elegant when she reaches for her hat. "Allow me to introduce myself."
The YoRHa Units, cautious and perplexed, don't say a word.
"Captain Caroline Archibald at your service," she proclaims with a gallant bow that requires the removal of her hat from her head for some reason. "I am from the illustrious Kingdom of Night. It has been a pleasure to experience sunlight in this part of the world, although I am not yet used to it."
Silence meets the captain's words.
She frowns.
"And you two are?"
"Um…I'm 9S?"
The Scanner wasn't sure why identifying himself came out as a question.
2B fared better, though she didn't seem interested in any pleasantries.
"Are you an Android or…"
The stranger's single eye brightens with mischief. "I am a Machine Lifeform based on the image of Androids like my brothers before me."
"Your brothers?" 9S questions, watching 2B as she carefully rises to her feet. "So, you're like Adam and Eve?"
The humanoid machine dressed as a pirate shrugs, her eye on 2B's sword in her hand. "More or less. But rest assured, I am not here to fight any Androids, YoRHa or otherwise."
2B positions herself in front of 9S. "How can we trust that? Machines are the enemy."
The captain merely rolls her eye. "I just wasted a good number of resources saving you two."
"That's fair I guess," 9S says, wary yet curious. "Are you going to give 2B her sword back?"
"Wasn't planning on it." The woman pauses, examining the pristine sword for a moment. "Consider this sword your payment for my services."
"We didn't ask for your help," 2B states, an edge to her tone as she starts to summon Virtuous Treaty. "Hand it over or I'll take it back by force."
Captain Caroline Archibald raises an eyebrow as silence envelops them all for a split second…
And then…
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!"
While cackling hysterically, Caroline tosses 2B back her weapon.
"You YoRHa Types are always itching for a fight," she states, still giggling rather loudly. "As fun as a battle with an elite soldier like you would be, I'll pass. I didn't come here to engage in unnecessary combat, but you two do owe me, so how about we discuss monetary compensation for my services."
At this suggestion, 2B and 9S physically deflate.
"Oh? Financial woes?"
"You have no idea," 9S ground out through gritted teeth, the memory of the bill from the IT department still fresh on his mind.
"We have no funds to pay you with…"
"Then give back the sword," Caroline cuts in, holding out her hand with an innocent expression plastered across her face. "It's only fair."
2B's hold tightens around the hilt of Virtuous Contract. "Not happening…unless you prefer to be cut down by it."
"Oooh! Scary." Caroline rocks back and forth on her heels, a contemplative expression on her face now. "Maybe you guys could join my crew for a bit? Work off your debt?"
"You could just take our gratitude," 9S offers sarcastically.
"Well, I would have accepted that if either of you had said thank you to begin with, but you're both quite rude."
042 chooses this moment to swoop in with a suggestion.
"Units 2B and 9S cannot take actions leading to the desertion of their responsibilities to YoRHa; however, they can perform a favor as compensation."
Caroline immediately smiles at the pod. "I like you. That sounds like a splendid idea…"
"SHOT THROUGH THE HEART!
AND YOU'RE TO BLAME!
DARLING, YOU GIVE LOVE…
A BAD NAME!"
"HEY! STOP IT YOU BAGS OF BOLTS! I'M TRYING TO HAVE A DIPLOMATIC DISCUSSION OVER HERE! DO YOU MIND!?"
"Pod, don't you think offering our services to machines is counterproductive to our cause?" 2B asks, irritated at both the singing and the odd machine lifeform before them.
"I do not see this as any different from assisting Pascal and the machine village," 042 states, waving its mechanical arms. "Though caution is advised, assisting a machine of this type could result in invaluable data for YoRHa."
9S forces out another sigh. "He's got a point, 2B. Besides, we can't afford any more debt from anyone, let alone a machine…"
"MY LIP-GLOSS IS POPIN!
MY LIP-GLOSS IS COOL!"
"What are you idiots even singing anymore?" Caroline shouts, smacking her forehead.
"SMOOTH LIKE BUTTER
LIKE A CRIMINAL UNDERCOVER!"
"Unbelievable," the Captain whispers, glowering at her crew for a few seconds before facing 2B and 9S again. "Listen, I have to whip them into shape, so I'll make this brief. I need some help gathering rare items to sell back in the Night Kingdom, and I suppose it would be nice to at least see my brothers. Help me do all that, and we'll be even. I may even assist you in your own monetary struggles. It could be a win-win, you feel me?"
2B and 9S offer a nod, but their expressions made it clear that they were not happy about this turn of events. It was better than death certainly…but not by a lot.
"Great," Caroline replies, offering a thumbs up and a wave before bolting toward her ship. "I'll send you a rendezvous point in a few minutes. Meet me there tomorrow around noon. Get plenty of maintenance and rest in the meantime. BYEEEEEEEEEE!"
The Machine Captain sprints toward her ship after that, her shouts toward her crew a tangle of commands and chastisement.
Our favorite android duo watches the strange machine for a moment, still bewildered by the sequence of events that took nearly two years for the authoress to throw together.
"9S…"
"Hmm?" He shifts a little shakily on his heels to face her and nearly gasps at the intensity of her crystal-blue eyes boring through his visor and into his mechanical soul.
After a few seconds she offers him a soft smile. "I'm…glad you're alright."
Returning her smile, 9S lifts his hands to remove his own visor.
2B watches him, her serene expression faltering slightly as the covering slips away from his face.
She's seen his eyes many times. Each instance is a bittersweet experience, especially on the occasions when she's been forced to cut him down.
In this moment, she sees an image of herself reflected in his gaze.
She feels beautiful there, captured in his stare.
Without saying a word, 9S stretches his hand out toward her.
There's a hint of hesitation in 2B's response, but with tenderness and relief singing through her heart, she brushes her fingertips against his.
"I'm glad you're safe too," he whispers. "Thank you, 2B."
"Hmm? For what?"
9S doesn't answer, just shakes his head while tightening his hold on her hand.
"Alert. Unit 9S' heart rate is rising."
"POD FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME!"
Pod 153's fans hum with what sounds like a soft whimper.
042 draws closer to the other Pod, its mechanical arms flailing dramatically when it says, "HOW DARE YOU MAKE THIS BRAVE SOUL CRY!"
2B starts walking then, pulling 9S along with her with a sigh of contentment as he and 042 squawk at each other.
For now, all is right with the world.
Yeah, that's not gonna last long folks.
A/N: And that's the end of this chapter. I hope you guys enjoyed the buffoonery. I have started the next chapter but it's not quite finished yet, so no promises on when the next post will be at this time. Many thanks to all of you for your patience. Feel free to check out my other NieR: Automata stories or my YouTube channel Lillymu961. Last year I did a whole series rambling about Automata's music and at present I'm chronicling my journey through the Kingdom Hearts series. Many thanks to any of you who choose to stop by the channel. Best wishes and God bless you all!