Reversal of Fortune

by Issa Moshup Ting

NSL Revenge AU. During his cursed beach visit in the infamous squirrel suit, Lincoln contemplates his relationship with his family. When he comes to terms with them being unstoppable lunatics who revel in his misery, he resolves to make them all pay. Credit to vivi1709 on DeviantArt for the cover image.

34. Chapter 34: Be Careful What You Wish For

Reversal of Fortune: Chapter 34: Be Careful What You Wish For

When Lucy opened her house's front door, her sisters laughed at and taunted her, "TOILET-CLOGGER AND PONYBOY SITTING IN A TREE! K-I-S-S-I-N-G! FIRST COMES LOVE, THEN COMES MARRIAGE, THEN COME THE BABIES IN BABY CARRIAGES!"

Lucy muttered, "Gag."

Luna spat, "Oh, gag yourself! Ugh, Lucy, even when you like something normal, it's still totally lame!"

Lucy asked Luna, "How do you guys know?"

Luna explained, "Dude, Lisa already showed us what happened! With creepy hidden cameras, but still!"

Lucy gasped, "She did?"

Lisa nodded, "Indeed, grayscale sibling unit. Now, everyone knows of your saccharine obsession! It's so sickeningly sweet I get a toothache just looking at it!"

Lola shrieked, "YEAH! PRINCESS PONY IS THE BIGGEST INSULT TO PRINCESSES EVER! I may be girly and pink, but I do have standards! Unlike spooky gothic girl here!"

Lana complained, "You made me break out Big Bertha for the lamest reason in the universe! AND you and Lincoln LIED about it!"

Lori added, "You're even worse than Lincoln the Liar! And he wears his underwear on the outside!"

The rest of the Loud sisters laughed before Lynn Jr. seethed, "I bet Stinkoln put you up to this so you can be his favorite sister! Oh, when I find him… I'm gonna force him to wear some Princess Pony girly panties and give him an atomic melvin that would rip his nutsack open! He'd really be Linka then!", to which the rest of the Loud siblings cruelly laughed.

Lucy pleaded with her sisters, "Guys, we've got to make sure Lincoln's alright."

Lana groaned, "Ugh! Butt out of it, Lucy! Why don't you marry him if you care that much?!"

A stunned Lucy sarcastically and blankly replied, "Gross. Sigh. We just need to check up on Lincoln, you dolts."

Lynn Jr. snarled, "Who cares about Stinkoln?! Not you! You know what… since he's not here, until he gets back, maybe you can test out my metal baseball bat, spooky! Let me go up to my room and grab it!"

Lucy sighed, "You know what, fine, I'll do it myself."

The rest of the siblings gasped before Lynn Jr., Lana, Lola, and Lisa immediately growled at Lucy, "Oh, so you want STINKOLN'S bad luck to rub off on you?"

Luna yelled, "UGH! NO WONDER! YOU WANT TO BE HIS FAVORITE, DON'T YOU? YOU LITTLE SELL OUT!"

The rest of the Loud siblings growled at Lucy in realization. Lucy tried to plead with them, "That's not even-", before Leni realized, "Wait… if Linky is bad luck, and Lucy wants to be around her… AAAH! LUCY'S BAD LUCK!"

Lynn Sr. chimed in from the kitchen, "They're right, Lucy!"

Lucy started, "But they were-", before Rita interrupted her from her room, "Yeah! Go to your room, Lucy!"

Lola smirked, "You heard Mom and Dad, Unlucky Pony. To your room… now."

Lucy groaned, "Sigh. If you insist."

As Lucy walked away from her siblings, Lynn Jr. taunted her, "BAD LUCK LUCY! BAD LUCK LUCY!"

Lucy tried to beg her siblings, "Guys, I'm not bad luck!"

Lori crossed her arms and asked Lucy, "Oh yeah? Then what's that bat doing on your head?"

As all eyes turned to Lucy, Lucy muttered, "A friend gave me that bat, Lori. And that bat's name is Abraham. You know, like Abraham Lincoln?"

The Louds briefly paused, as if anticipating a corny laugh followed by a, "Get it?", from Luan. But none came.

Lisa then filled the silence by suggesting to Lucy, "If you'll come up to my room, I can safely test you for the calamitous ailment of bad luck. In the event of a cross-contamination, the only suitable outcome is an aggressive sterilization and liquidation of all traces of your existence for the safety of all other familial units."

Lucy asked Lisa, "Am I not supposed to be going to my room?", before being interrupted by Lana, "Ooh! Maybe we can put her on that laser machine thingy to detect how unlucky she is!"

Lisa smirked, "Precisely, mudstain sibling unit. Now, come on, grayscale sororal unit, we have no time to waste."

Lucy groaned, "Sigh," before following Lisa and Lana upstairs. When Lynn Jr. noticed this, she gasped, "I can't let Lucy turn Lisa and Lana into bad luck, too."

Lynn Jr. quickly chased down Lucy before tackling her, causing Lucy's face to hit the carpet of the first step of the house's stairwell. Abraham quickly flew off of her when he noticed Lynn Jr. coming, leaving Lucy all alone against the might of the Loud sisters.

As the Loud sisters laughed at Lucy, Lynn Jr. yelled, "Come on, Pony Lucy, neigh for me! NEIGH! NEIGH!"

The rest of the Loud sisters continued laughing while Lynn Jr. zipped Lucy's bag open and dug through it. Lynn Jr. uttered, "Let's see here… Vampires of Melancholia lunchbox, creepy bust, whoa-ho-ho! You made dolls of us?"

Lucy blankly stared at Lynn Jr. as the rest of the Loud sisters laughed with each item she mentioned. Lynn Jr. continued to wantonly toss items out of Lucy's bag, "school books, school books, school books, school agenda, lunch bag, tissues from Mommy-", before asking, "Ooh! What's this weird ball?!", as she pulled Lucy's crystal ball out of her backpack.

Lucy cried, "DON'T!", as Lynn Jr. readied her arm in a throwing motion.

Lynn Jr. scoffed, "You're right. This thing's probably got lingering curse vibes, anyways. Besides, I don't want to make a mess like you."

The Loud sisters cruelly laughed at Lynn Jr.'s joke before Lynn Jr. took a copy of Lincoln's comic book from his bag.

Upon glancing at the comic book, Lynn Jr. laughed, "Oh, so now you like comic books like Stinkoln! Laaaaaaaame! What's next, you two are gonna play video games together, too? I bet I can…", before gasping when her eyes focused on the comic book's cover.

As Lynn Jr. studied the cover of Lincoln's comic book, her jaw dropped in awe at the quality of Lincoln's drawing. The flying Ace Savvy version of Lincoln superimposed over her and her sisters' friends looked absolutely gorgeous and true-to-life. Lynn Jr. could have sworn that everyone on Lincoln's apparent superhero team looked good in their costumes, and for a split-second, wondered if she would also be featured as a superhero. That was, of course, until she saw a ten-headed chimera facing Lincoln and the rest of his team, with faces that eerily resembled those of her and her sisters.

Lynn Jr. was so moved by the quality of the comic that she unintelligibly stammered, "Ah… ah…. ah."

Lucy asked, "Um… Lynn… are you OK?"

As Lynn Jr. continued to drool over the comic's quality, Lucy waved her hand in front of Lynn Jr.'s face and asked, "Umm… hello… earth to Lynn?"

Lynn Jr., however, remained frozen in place, causing the rest of the Loud sisters to stop laughing and take notice of her current state.

Lori asked, "Hey, Lynn, what you looking at over there?"

Lynn Jr. stammered, "S-S-Stinkoln. C-comic. B-beautiful. Us."

The rest of the Loud sisters traded glances before immediately rushing to Lynn's side and talking in a helter-skelter manner.

Lola shrieked, "LET ME SEE!"

Lori yelled, "I literally need to see this!"

Leni gasped, "Oh my gosh! Are we famous?!"

Lana asked, "We're in a comic with Lincoln?!"

Luna pondered, "Are we good guys? Are we bad guys?"

At that moment, Lynn Sr. and Rita ran into the living room, fretting, "Kids, what's going on?"

Lynn Jr. told her siblings and parents, "If you all could step away from the merchandise, maybe you could clearly see what I'm trying to show you."

The Loud siblings and parents immediately backed away and formed a semi-circle facing Lynn Jr. so that they could clearly see the comic book cover that had taken Lynn Jr.'s breath away. When they got a good look at it, they gasped.

Lori exclaimed, "Wow… this is literally immaculate!"

Leni chimed, "I know! Whoever drew this totes got Becky, Dana, and Jackie perfectly! Oh, and the Sweetwater parents, too!"

Luna cheered, "Dude, Sam looks rockin'!"

Lisa proclaimed, "The illustrator's depiction of our closest associates is stunningly accurate. Normally, I'm not one for inane human emotions, but-", before bursting into tears of joy.

Lynn Sr. cried, "W-wow! Brian as the Incredible Hulk, and Linda as some sort of Wonder Woman? We've got to give this a read!"

Lola shrieked, "I knew we'd be famous one day!", before noticing, "Wait… why is Lindsay Sweetwater on this cover?"

Lori realized, "Yeah, and perfect Carol Pingrey is fighting alongside Lincoln, too! That girl's just gonna stab him in the back like she did me!"

Leni then pointed out, "And why do our heads look like they're attached to that creature thingy, not with Lincoln?! And why does everyone on that cover look mad at us?!"

Lucy crossed her arms and demanded, "Why don't you read the book and find out?!"

Lisa sighed, "Lucy's correct. While I am not usually one to partake in the consumption of such juvenile material, let's read this book to confirm our suspicions."

Lola squealed, "Ooh, goodie!", as Lisa opened the comic book.

The Loud sisters and parents cheered as they started to read the comic book.

The Loud sisters laughed as Lincoln was chased out of numerous places on accord of being bad luck, with Lynn Jr. even scoffing, "Serves him right for lying!"

Meanwhile, upon reading the same panels and listening to their kids laugh at Lincoln, Lynn Sr. and Rita traded glances, but merely told their kids, "Erm… let's see where this goes before we make a final call on the story."

The Loud siblings agreed and continued to read the story. However, when the Ten-Headed Beast, a chimera bearing the heads of all of the Loud sisters, was shown to be behind these incidents, accompanied by mad scientists who looked like their parents and evil attack animals inspired by their real-life pets, the Louds immediately grew outraged.

Lana shrieked, "That JERK! How DARE he insult the memory of our pets like that!"

Lori growled, "The nerve of that little weasel! I swear, the next time I see whoever wrote this, I'm going to literally turn him into a human pretzel!"

Luna clenched her fists and shot, "Get in line, girl!"

Lola taunted, "The pages of this comic don't even deserve to be used to wipe Luan's butt! AFTER Fake April Fools' Day!"

Lucy sighed, "Just keep reading."

Lynn Jr. sighed, "Alright, but if only to see what happens to Stinkoln after he tries to mess with us."

Then, as the Louds watched Lincoln form alliances with their friends, they became confused. Lori, Lola, and Lisa expressed open hostility and rage when Lincoln formed alliances with Royal Flush in Carol, the Queen of Diamonds in Lindsay, and the Card Counter in Melissa, respectively. By the time Lincoln and his allies began to fight the Ten-Headed Beast, their pupils had shrunk to the size of peas. Angry and deeply offended, the Loud sisters gritted their teeth and narrowed their eyebrows at Lucy.

Lisa slammed the book shut before scowling, "Apparently, sibling units, I was wrong. These childish images are in no way accurate representations of us, our brother unit, or our associates portrayed in the book. Hmm… it appears as if Principal Huggins' name is on the front cover. Given this information, I think our best course of action is to file a defamation lawsuit."

Lucy sighed, "Principal Huggins didn't create that comic."

The rest of the Loud sisters gasped as Leni asked, "But how? His name is on the cover!"

Lynn Jr. laughed, "How old is that doofus… like 60? And he's still into comics?! That is so lame!"

The rest of the Loud sisters mercilessly laughed at Principal Huggins. Lucy, despite herself, let out a small chuckle before explaining, "Sigh. Lincoln actually drew it, but-", before being interrupted by Leni dropping the comic and yelling, "AAH! LINKY DREW THE COMIC! IT'S BAD LUCK!"

Lola shrieked in horror, "BURN IT! BURN IT!"

The rest of the Louds turned to Lynn Jr., who immediately put her hands up and said, "Whoa, I'm not touching that thing!"

The Loud sisters and parents then looked at each other before tapping their fingers to their noses and yelling, "DIBS, NOT IT!"

Unfortunately, Leni was a little slower than the rest of the Loud sisters to catch on, and she facepalmed to herself, "Dang it, I always miss those."

However, Lynn Jr. encouraged Leni, "You're making a great sacrifice for this family, Leni. Don't blow it."

Leni gasped, "Oh my god, are we going to blow up the book?"

Lori facepalmed, "No, Leni, we're just going to put it in the fireplace and burn it."

Leni smiled, "Oh, OK!", while starting a chant, "Burn the book! Burn the book!"

The rest of the Loud sisters and parentsquickly joined in the chant. Lucy tried to plead with them, "Guys, don't-", before quickly noticing that the Loud sisters, in their frenzy, didn't even listen to her. She grumbled to herself, "Sigh," before grabbing her photo album of Lincoln out of her bag and turning around to walk up the stairs to her room as discreetly as possible. However, when Lynn Jr. turned the fireplace on, Lucy caught the light out of the corner of her eyes. Lucy gasped as she watched the Loud sisters cheer the burning of Lincoln's comic book in frozen, rapt horror.

As the comic disintegrated into smoldering ashes, Lynn Jr. proclaimed, "Phew, dodged a bullet there! We almost got cursed!"

Lucy defended Lincoln, "What the hell, guys?! This was Lincoln's hard work, something he put time and love into, and you destroyed it just like that?"

Luna fired back, "That book was literally cursed, dude! Plus, it made us look like total monsters! Which we're not!"

Lucy deadpanned, "Lincoln and I beg to differ."

Lynn Jr. scoffed, "Lincoln and you? That's a laugher."

Lori asked, "Yeah, what about us could make him, or you, think we're literally monsters?"

Leni screeched, "AAH! MONSTERS!", before hiding underneath the couch.

Lucy groaned, "Sigh, Leni, I meant that I think you guys are total meanies."

Leni immediately leapt off the couch and rejoined her sisters. She crossed her arms, stared Lucy down, and protested, "What? We're meanies? As if! I'm like, totes, the nicest person I know."

Lucy sighed, "Whenever things go wrong, we always gang up on him in this house. Numerous times, we've beaten him up, disrespected and dismissed his interests and hobbies, treated him like an obstacle, pranked him sadistically, blackmailed him, scapegoated him for our wrongdoings, made it impossible for him to get anything done, purposely destroyed his homework, humiliated him and made him take the blame, set him up with numerous girls who beat him up and humiliated for us, and practically forced him to do whatever we wanted like a slave. And our parents, and the town in general, have taken our side every time."

Lori immediately protested, "So what? He's our brother! We love him no matter what! Plus, we've got to keep him in line somehow!"

Lola scoffed, "Yeah! I mean, what siblings don't do that kind of stuff to each other?"

Lucy sassed, "Good ones."

Lynn Jr. grumbled, "You wouldn't know what being a good sister is like if it hit you over the head! And don't forget everything Lincoln's done to us! And how much of a sneak he is!"

Lucy crossed her arms and countered, "We kicked him out and sold everything he had. The onus shouldn't be on him to prove himself to us. We'd be lucky if he ever wanted to see us again."

Lynn Jr. protested, "So? That was his fault! He shouldn't have lied about being bad luck."

Leni agreed, "Yeah, it's totes wrong to lie."

Lori asked, "Why are you literally trying to cover for a liar?"

Lola growled, "Trying to kiss up to him? Become his favorite?"

Luna pointed out, "Don't act so high and mighty. You were the one who told us to sell everything!"

Lynn Jr. roared, "And we're still getting bad luck… from everywhere!"

As the rest of the Louds angrily protested Lucy's words, Lucy spat, "Bad luck? Who cares! That was Lincoln's! He deserved to win that comic contest!"

Lisa protested, "Oh, really?! What does that life-ruiner do that benefits mankind?! Certainly not that comic, which is a feeble attempt to foster division and hatred!"

Lynn Sr. tried to calm down his angered kids, "Kids, calm down! Look… I'm pretty sure everything can be explained as just a bad stretch. We'll get through it, gang! Now come on, chin up!

Lucy informed Lynn Sr., "Sigh. I'm gonna head to my room. Get away from all this nonsense."

As Lucy tried to walk up the stairs to her room, Lynn Jr. suddenly noticed what appeared to be the bottom of a book peeking out of Lucy's arms. She narrowed her eyes at Lucy and asked her, "What 'cha hidin' there, spooky?"

Lucy stammered, "N-n-nothing, L-Lynn."

Lori insisted, "You can literally tell us anything." However, she barely managed to stifle her chuckles as she tried to assure Lucy, "I mean, it's not like we're gonna throw you out of the house over a stupid Princess Pony book."

Lucy snarled, "You don't deserve to see this book, you heartless monsters."

The rest of the Loud sisters glared at Lucy before Lynn Jr. insisted, "Don't deserve to see the book? Sister, I've been defending this house against bad luck for the past 3 weeks."

Lucy sarcastically scoffed, "Some job you've been doing."

Lynn Jr. fired back, "That's why we need to take extra-special measures to make sure no bad luck gets in or out of the house! Speaking of which, we're going to need to do something with that bat later tonight, but for now, show me what you're holding."

Lucy replied, "No."

Lynn Jr. spat, "Give it."

Lucy repeated herself, "No."

As Lynn Jr. growled and clenched her fists at Lucy, Lucy added, "And you're not going to make me."

Lynn Jr. scoffed, "Oh… it is so on."

Lynn Jr. then wrestled Lucy to the ground as the two fought for control of Lincoln's photo album. Like the first time they wrestled, Lucy put up a surprisingly good fight despite Lynn Jr.'s superior strength and athleticism. The rest of the Loud sisters cheered, "Yeah! Get that book!"

Unfortunately for Lucy, she was too physically and emotionally exhausted from the events of that day to pull Lincoln's photo album back into her arms. Within about 20 seconds, Lynn Jr. managed to wrestle the book from Lucy's control, leaving Lucy lying flat on her back in defeat and despair.

When Lynn Jr. gazed upon the book, she immediately recognized it as Lincoln's photo album by virtue of its orange cover. This caused her to yelp in fright and slam the book back into Lucy's hands.

The rest of the Loud sisters gave Lynn Jr. concerned looks as Lori panted, "What is it, Lynn?"

Lynn Jr. opened her mouth to speak before Lucy interrupted her, "It's Lincoln's photo album," causing the rest of the Loud sisters to gasp in horror. Lucy then turned to Lynn Jr. and sassed her, "You know, Lynn, you could have done that a little more ceremoniously."

An unfazed Lynn Jr. yelled at Lucy, "YOU KEPT THE PHOTO ALBUM?! WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!"

Lucy explained, "Sigh… I tried to burn it, but it wouldn't burn."

Lynn Jr. shrieked, "IT WOULDN'T BURN?! WHAT DO YOU MEAN, IT WOULDN'T BURN? YOU THREW IT IN THE FIREPLACE! WE SAW IT!"

Lucy deadpanned, "I guess the spirits commanded it that Lincoln's photo album not burn. And I am not one to go against the spirits. So if you burn this album… I warn you, you will be cursing yourselves to lives of misery and suffering."

Lynn Jr. threatened Lucy, "Spooky, I'm giving you one last chance. You have three seconds to burn that photo album, and anything else that jinx might have touched, before I drag you to that fireplace and make you burn them yourself."

Lucy stammered, "W-what?!"

Rita urged her daughters, "Whoa, calm down, guys! I'm-", before Lana interrupted her, "Three."

Rita tried to defend Lucy, "I'm pretty sure she'll come to her-", before Lola interjected, "Two."

Rita resumed, "-senses, and then we can move on-", before Lynn Jr. snarled, "One."

As Lynn Jr. slammed her right fist against her left palm, Rita concluded, "-like this never happened."

Amazingly, Lynn Jr. stopped to tell Rita, "Never happened? Our pets are dead! Most of us are total outcasts! Including spooky over there! I bet you're next, Mom!"

The rest of the Loud sisters yelled in agreement and worry, "YEAH!"

At the panicked yells of their children, Lynn Sr. and Rita traded glances before Lynn Sr. whispered to Rita, "Maybe we should let them handle this one, honey."

Rita nodded, "Good call," before she and Lynn Sr. backed away from their terrified kids. As they did, Lynn Jr. stomped towards Lucy. Inches from her face, she drove her finger into Lucy's chest, and threatened to her, "You're lucky mom covered for you. But your count is still 0-and-2. Last chance, Luce. Give up the book, or by the power vested in me by the Gods of Softball, I will have to take drastic measures to protect this family."

Lucy paled as she quivered in horror, "W-what do you mean?"

Lynn Jr. challenged Lucy, "Oh, I think you know what I mean, Spooky. And you know we're not afraid to do it, if that's what it takes. You have a choice: Stinkoln's photo album, or us. Choose wisely."

Lucy straightened, stared Lynn Jr. in the eyes, and hugged the photo album as she firmly told the jock, "I'm keeping Lincoln's photo album."

The rest of the Louds gasped in shock and horror, appalled that one of their own chose a cursed book over keeping the rest of them in good fortunes.

Lori yelled, "You literally chose the book?!"

Lucy growled, "Yeah. You got a problem with that?"

Lola shrieked, "YES WE DO, YOU LITTLE TRAITOR!" She then ran up to wrestle Lucy to the ground before Lynn Jr. held her back, reassuring her, "Calm down, Lols. I've got this." As Lynn Jr. saw Lola continue to resist her grip, she turned to Lori and told her, "Hold her back for me."

Lori nodded, "You've literally got it," before grabbing Lola from behind in a bear-hug. Lola yelled, "LET ME GO!", and thrashed against Lori's grip, but to no avail.

Meanwhile, Lynn Jr. whispered to Lucy, "If you love that life-ruiner so much, I'm gonna let you join him." She then pointed to the front door and yelled at Lucy, "3 strikes, Lucy, you're out!"

The sisters and parents yelled in agreement, "YEAH!"

Lucy pleaded, "I thought you said you wouldn't throw me out!"

Lori defended, "Yeah, and I quote, 'over a stupid Princess Pony book!'"

Lynn Jr. sinisterly pointed out, "But that wasn't a Princess Pony book, now, was it?"

Lucy's eyes widened in horror at the implications of Lori and Lynn Jr.'s words. Lucy sadly and desperately looked to her parents, silently mouthing, "Please… do something."

Lynn Sr. and Rita traded glances before staring Lucy down, glaring at her, and shaking their heads with a mix of betrayal and regret. When Lucy saw her parents shake their heads at her, the desperation on her face turned to despair. As Lucy gazed upon the enraged, threatening, hate-filled faces of her own parents and sisters, any thoughts of briefly sticking around to curse the family were immediately extinguished by the fear that she felt looking into their eyes.

Lucy then looked at Rita's phone screen and sniffled, "Luan… please!"

Luan, through her phone screen, continued to frown at Lucy as a scornful look adorned her face.

Lucy slumped, looked down, and whimpered, "Sigh," before grabbing her backpack and all of her stuff off the floor. After re-packing her school backpack, Lucy turned around, despondently walked out the front door and closed it behind her. A split-second later, Lucy heard a "click" sound from the other side of the door. Immediately recognizing the sound as the locking of the front door, Lucy sat on the steps of the front porch with tears in her eyes.

To add insult to injury, Luna snarled at Lucy from inside the house, "You can't sit there, dudette!"

Lucy blubbered, "Where am I supposed to go?"

Lynn Jr. scoffed, "I don't know. Anywhere yours and Stinkoln's bad luck can't ruin our lives."

Lucy sniffled, "Sigh," as she slowly and despondently walked off the house's front porch into the backyard.

Meanwhile, back inside the Loud House, Lana suggested, "Hey, maybe we should sell Lucy's furniture, too! You know, just in case Lincoln's bad luck rubbed off on that, too."

Lynn Jr. flashed a 'thumbs down' sign at the Louds and made a 'buzzer noise' as she pointed out, "Fat chance! Lucy's stuff is creepy enough as it is, so who would even want to buy it?"

Lola cried, "Yeah! You couldn't even pay me to take it… and that was before we learned of her bad luck!"

Lisa sighed, "I concur, family units. Besides, our sororal sibling unit's propensity towards bringing misfortune unto this house shall cease if she chooses to dispose of her binder containing a photographic portfolio commemorating numerous occasions in our brother unit's life. The binder's unlucky properties, particularly its numerous depictions of our unlucky sibling, pose too great of a hazard for any of us to dispose of it ourselves."

The rest of the Louds blinked before Lisa explained, "Lucy can come back if she gets rid of Lincoln's photo album. The album is bad luck, so it would be too dangerous for us to get rid of it ourselves."

Lynn Jr. added, "Yeah, but how are we going to get it out of here without catching Lucy's bad luck? One thing's for sure, I'm not touching that thing!"

After the rest of the Louds murmured in agreement, Lisa pointed out, "I fail to understand why everyone is so averse to making physical contact with Lucy's furniture. When we removed our brother unit's furniture from this domicile, we physically handled it on our way to its disposal."

The rest of the Louds deadpanned at Lisa, causing her to sigh, "Before we actually sold the furniture, we had to find some way to get it out of the house, and into and out of Vanzilla. Which included touching it. Think about it… how else could we have lifted it?"

Rita concurred, "Well, Lisa, you do have a point. Again, I'm pretty sure Lucy will come to her senses and get rid of her little unlucky book, just like Lincoln did."

Lynn Sr. agreed, "Yeah!", before turning to his namesake and asking her, "Sport, what do you suggest?"

Lynn Jr. proclaimed, "Outside with Lucy's furniture!" The rest of the Louds cheered, "Yeah!", and immediately beelined for Lucy's room. Lynn Jr. immediately tore the door off its hinges, and the Louds proceeded to ransack Lucy's room, and all of her possessions, and drag them outside.

---

(Scene Change: Backyard)

As Lucy sadly walked through the backyard, she kept repeating to herself through tears, "What have I done?" When she heard her family yelling and stampeding, she muttered to herself, "I swear on the Ebony Dark Demented Raven… I'm cursing this family tonight."

Suddenly, Lana slammed the patio door open so Luna could run outside while carrying Lucy's night table like a battering ram. Lucy leapt out of the way as Luna yelled, "Move it, dude!", and stayed out of the way as her family proceeded to spend the next few minutes carelessly throwing all of her furniture out into the backyard. Throughout the ordeal, Lucy repeatedly tried to beg her family to let her back inside, only to be ignored.

Within 10 minutes, Lori and Lynn Jr. had managed to place the last piece of Lucy's furniture, her bed, onto the backyard. As Lori and Lynn Jr. put the bed down, Lynn Jr. clapped her hands together, put her hands on her hips, and smirked, "That's how we do it."

Immediately after that, Lori, Lynn Jr., and Lucy noticed the first drops of drizzle fall onto the grass. Lori groaned, "Ugh… rain. Let's literally get inside before we get soaked."

As Lori and Lynn Jr. started running back to the house, Lucy pleaded with them, "Guys… please… let me come in with you."

Lori and Lynn Jr. immediately stopped in their tracks, turned around, and glared at Lucy while crossing their arms. Lori scoffed, "Should have thought of that when you decided to keep the twerp's photo album around and curse us, Lu-scourge," before walking away.

With no one else to turn to, Lucy followed Lynn Jr. to the house's back door and begged her, "Lynn… please… it's starting to rain. It's getting cold."

For a brief moment, Lynn Jr. looked deeply into Lucy's eyes, giving her hope. Then, Lynn Jr. looked back to her angry family. She then turned towards Lucy, coldly crossed her arms at her, frowned, and mocked her, "I don't know, sleep in the doghouse or something. At least we're giving you more comfortable accommodations than Stinkoln, Lu-curse", before walking in and slamming the door shut on her.

The rest of the Louds immediately exhaled in relief before Lynn Sr. spoke up, "Thanks for helping to protect our family, girls!"

Lori and Lynn Jr. proudly smiled at their dad, with Lori responding, "Literally no problem."

Lynn Sr. then asked Lori and Lynn Jr., "You girls wanna help your old man out with dinner?"

Lori and Lynn Jr. smiled, "You bet!"

Lisa then informed her family, "I'll go work on my robot, Todd. If you need me, I'll be in my sleeping quarters," before walking away from the kitchen.

Lana also nervously laughed, "Umm… yeah… and I'll make sure to board up Lucy's room. You know, keep the bad luck from reaching us," before also walking away from the kitchen.

As Lynn Sr. sang a jazzy tune while cooking turkey loaf, Lynn Jr. whispered to Lori, "That little creep! Who does she think she is?"

Lori sneered, "Literally. This family supports each other!."

Lynn Jr. snickered, "You've got that right." As Lynn Jr. watched her father cook turkey loaf for his family, something about the tune Lynn Sr. was singing reminded her of how she and her sisters mocked Lori for defecating in a trash can in front of her entire high school. With that in mind, Lynn Jr. smirked as a sinister idea came to her mind.

Lynn Jr. called out, "Hey, Lori!"

Lori responded, "What's up?"

Lynn Jr. grinned, "How'd you like to no longer be called 'Lori BrownPants'?!"

Lori unconsciously frowned at Lynn Jr. before pondering, "Hmm… that's a tempting offer. But I literally don't know how I'd be able to pull that off."

Lynn Jr. pointed out, "We'd be getting back at Lucy, too, for betraying this family and threatening us with bad luck."

Lori smirked back at Lynn Jr. and replied, "Deal. But there'd better be no backsies this time."

Lynn Jr. assured Lori, "You can count on me."

Lori panted, "Alright. So what are we going to do?"

After Lynn Jr. whispered her plan to Lori, Lori gasped, "That's literally so mean!" She then evilly grinned, "But after everything Lucy's done to us… including siding with Linky the Cowardly Dork… I'm in."

Lynn Jr. smirked, "I knew you would be." After exchanging a fist-bump with Lori, Lynn Jr. commanded her, "Come on! Let's go to Lisa's room and see if she has any of that Colon Storm liquid left!"

Lori laughed, "Literally on it!"

After Lori and Lynn Jr. ran upstairs to Lisa's room, Lori knocked on the door, "Lisa! Lisa!"

Lisa opened the door, groaning, "What is it, eldest sibling unit?"

Lynn Jr. asked, "You got any of that Colon Storm liquid left over from our fake April Fools' Day prank against Luan?"

Lisa put her finger to her chin, as if in deep thought, and cautiously replied with a slight, evil smile, "It is a distinct possibility." She then pondered, "Hmm… our father unit wants the two of you to assist in his preparation of tonight's dinner. I presume your request relates to said task."

Lori explained, "We literally can't let Lucy's display of selfishness and treason go unpunished."

Lisa hummed, "Hmm…", before asking Lori, "Your eagerness to execute this plot is due to the viral humiliation and social ostracism you were subject to as a result of the Lori BrownPants incident, perhaps?"

Lynn Jr. laughed loudly at Lisa's "Lori BrownPants" remark, causing Lori to growl at Lynn Jr. and shake her fist at her. Lori quickly cleared her throat, "M-moving on… you got the Colon Storm or not?"

Lisa sighed, "I presume I can procure a few tablespoons that look like the seasoning our father unit usually uses on his turkey loaf dinner."

Lori and Lynn Jr. smirked to each other as Lisa walked over to her cabinet and searched for a beaker with her liquid solution of enhanced Colon Storm. When Lisa found the beaker she was looking for, she filled a small plastic cup with its contents before handing said cup to Lori.

As Lisa handed Lori the cup, she told her, "Here you go. Now, remember… apply this very carefully. We all witnessed the effects of this solution on Luan. Make sure no one else handles this cup, and that no one drinks it. That includes you, fifth-eldest sibling unit."

Lynn Jr. burst, "Why would I-", before noticing Lisa and Lori's deadpan looks. In response, Lynn Jr. huffed and crossed her arms, "Whatever, you can count on me," before saying, "Come on, Lori, let's go!"

Unfortunately, Lori's stomach rumbled, putting the kibosh on that plan. When Lori sensed her stomach rumbling, she handed the cup to Lynn Jr. and hastily told her, "Sorry, but this one's gonna be all on you!", before running to new ensuite bathroom inside her room.

Upon returning to the kitchen, Lynn Jr. opened the fridge and carefully put her cup inside it, making sure not to spill any of its contents. After doing so, she heard Lynn Sr. chirp, "Hey, LJ! Back to help the OG?!"

Lynn Jr. smiled and gave Lynn Sr. a thumbs-up gesture before returning to help him in the kitchen.

---

(Time Skip: 1 hour later)

Lynn Sr. handed Lynn Jr. a small plate of turkey loaf and a glass of blood orange iced tea. He then asked her, "Sport, you mind taking this over to Lucy? You can just text her that her food's at the backyard patio if she wants it."

Lynn Jr. smiled, "OK!" She then grabbed the plate before walking over to Lori and snickering, "Lori, it's time."

Lori giggled, "Literally on it," before taking the Colon Storm cup out of the fridge. She then looked over her shoulder to see if Lynn Sr. was looking at her. When Lori saw Lynn Sr. solely focused on divvying up plates of turkey loaf for his family, she gently poured the Colon Storm all over Lucy's turkey loaf before throwing the plastic cup in the recycling bag.

Lori and Lynn Jr. snickered to themselves as they walked to the backyard door, but thankfully, Lynn Sr. didn't notice. As Lori snickered, she whispered to Lynn Jr., "Lucy thinks bad luck is cool? She thinks it's funny? Well, we're literally gonna show her what bad luck truly feels like!"

Lori and Lynn Jr. laughed the rest of the way to the backyard door before Lori opened said door for Lynn Jr., who then stepped out onto the patio to drop Lucy's food off. Lori then closed the door before Lynn Jr. knocked, "Yo, spooky… dinner's ready!"

The two snickered to themselves all the way back to the kitchen while their dad yelled, "Kids, dinner's ready!"

Meanwhile, in the backyard, Lucy, who had been sitting on the lowest step leading to the Loud House's back door, slowly stepped up to the patio before seeing her food laid out for her on the floor. When Lucy saw this, she knocked on the door in an attempt to get her family, "Guys, please!", only to see through the window that her family was completely ignoring her and that Lynn Jr. even gave her a throat-slitting gesture. Defeated, Lucy knelt in despairing, shameful tears on the patio before picking up her fork and beginning to eat the Colon Storm-laced turkey loaf dinner.

---

(Time Skip: 20 minutes later)

As the Louds finished the last bits of their turkey loaf dinner, the younger Loud siblings at the kiddie table noticed their older siblings gathering around them with big, devious smiles on their faces.

A suspicious Lola huffed, "What are you guys doing here? Don't you have fancy grown-up conversations to attend to?!"

Lynn Jr. snickered, "Wait for it, Lols. Girls, please direct your attention to the backyard for the debut of Loose-Butt!"

Lana asked, "Loose-Butt? What do you mean, Loose-Butt?"

Lynn Jr. slugged Lana in the arm and assured her, "Wait for it… 3… 2… 1…", before everyone in the house heard a loud, pained, yet deadpan scream from the backyard.

Lola gasped, "What the heck was that?"

The next moment, the rest of the Loud family heard loud slamming on the backyard door. Immediately running over to check the commotion, they heard Lucy panting, "Guys… guys… let me in… please… I really need…. AAAAAAAHHH!", as she kept pooping diarrhea onto the patio.

The rest of the Loud siblings cruelly laughed at Lucy. Lori pulled out her camera and panted, "I literally need to record this!" When Lori started recording Lucy, she taunted her, "This is what you get for cursing our family, you creep!"

Lynn Jr. yelled, "Go poop somewhere else, Loose-Ass! Not on our back patio! That poop might be cursed!"

Lisa taunted, "And the award for least desirable sibling goes to…", before the rest of the Loud siblings yelled, in unison, "LOO-SEY!", before laughing hysterically at Lucy's misfortune.

The emotional pain the Louds inflicted on Lucy through their taunting caused her diarrhea to become explosive. As Lucy howled in pain while the rest of the Loud sisters laughed at her, Lynn Sr. and Rita traded glances before Rita sighed, "I'll get the toilet paper."

Lynn Sr. added, "And I'll get the plastic bags," before the two left their daughters to do just that.

Lucy begged, "Guys, please, let me in!", right before grunting in pain again as she pooped.

The rest of the Louds traded glances before Lynn Jr. chuckled, "No way! Your bad luck's gonna clog our toilet! The only toilet we have!"

Lisa and Lana traded nervous glances before Lisa backed Lynn Jr. up, "Yes, gothic sororal unit."

Lana whined, "Aww! It's no fair! Why don't I get to poop outside like Loose-Butt over there?!"

While most of the Louds laughed at Lana's complaint, Lola rolled her eyes and scoffed, "Typical."

Leni joked, "Hey, at least you, like, get your own toilet now outside, Lu-NA!", but as Leni laughed, the rest of the Louds gave her weird looks and facepalmed.

A bewildered Luna asked Leni, "Wait, what?!"

Lori sighed, "Leni, we're making fun of Lucy here, not Luna."

Leni replied, "Ohh," before chirping, "Well, #lucymadeastinky!"

Lynn Jr. fanned her nose while mocking Lucy, "Stinky stinky stinky! Loose-Poop made a stinky outside! Aww… poor widduh girl needs toilet paper pronto!", as the rest of the Loud sisters continued to laugh at Lucy.

As the Loud sisters laughed at Lucy, Lynn Sr. and Rita burst into the kitchen. Lynn Sr. had Charles' unused poop bags in his hands, while Rita had a roll of toilet paper and a box of Wet Wipes in her hand.

After Lynn Sr. and Rita shoved their toiletries through the doggy door, Lucy tried to plead with them, "Guys… please… let me inside… I think this is serious."

Lynn Sr. replied, "Sorry, honey, can't do it! Your bad luck might clog the toilet!"

Rita added, "Yeah, we gave everything you need, honey! You'll be OK! Just give us a shout if you need medicine!"

As Lucy felt the drizzle continue to fall on her arms and onto the dark ground, and noticed the contrast between that and the well-lit, dry house she had just been barred from, Lucy growled and muttered to herself under her breath, "Now I know how Lincoln felt," before picking up her toilet paper, Wet Wipes, and poop bags and walking towards Charles' doghouse.

Back inside the Loud House, Lola climbed on top of the kitchen counter and grabbed a mega-sized bottle of Colon Storm before jumping back down onto the kitchen floor. Lola then spontaneously grabbed her phone, put the camera on, and started filming. Upon doing so, she laughed into the camera, "We totally poisoned Lucy and stuff!"

Lynn Jr. then jumped into the camera's focus and bragged while giving gangsta hand gestures, "Every last drop, son! Lucy finna be shitting her guts out for days!"

Luna cut in, "For days, yo! For days!"

Lola then stopped the recording before effusing, "Ooh, this is so going on SwiftyPic!"

The other Loud siblings laughed loudly.

---

(Time Skip: 11:00 PM, Charles' Former Doghouse)

After spending the rest of the night either rearranging her furniture or pooping in the Louds' outdoor trash bins, Lucy peeked her head out of the doghouse. The rain had noticeably picked up and was getting heavier by the hour, with small puddles forming in the backyard. An exhausted, somewhat dehydrated Lucy put her crystal ball before her, knelt before it, and pleaded, "Oh spirits… what must I do to break this curse on my family?"

The crystal ball sparked to life and began to show Lucy a vision of herself weeping in what appeared to be a cupboard bedroom. Lucy then heard a voice snarling at her crystal ball self, "Quiet down, you stupid girl!" In the vision, Lucy tried to stifle her sobs, only for a middle-aged, portly white man with curly black hair, bushy black eyebrows, and a prominent black mustache dressed in a collared grey shirt and dark grey khakis to break the door down. The man bellowed, "You think crying is going to solve anything?" As the tears kept streaming down Lucy's face in the vision, Billy snapped, "Get yourself together," before grabbing her by the arm and dragging her into the living room.

The man towered over a trembling Lucy, his face twisted in anger. He then pulled off his black belt and proclaimed, "I'll give you something to cry about!", before repeatedly lashing Lucy with his belt. Lucy screamed in pain while trying to curl up into a ball to protect herself, but the man kept hitting her even past the point where she stopped crying and started merely gasping for breath as her entire body had become wracked with pain.

When the man stopped beating Lucy, he also took his piggy bank and scolded her, "And that's for spending the fortune that I give you on useless garbage! There, now at least something you do can be of use to the people around you."

The crystal ball vision then quickly blurred, causing Lucy to beg, "Spirits, please!", to no avail. After Lucy took a minute to reflect on what she had seen in the crystal ball's vision, she suddenly realized how she would use her skills to get back into the Loud House, and into the good graces of Lincoln and the rest of her family.

With newfound determination, Lucy straightened herself, picked Lincoln's photo album up, and inwardly decided, That's it. I'm getting back into the Loud House. Whether they like it or not. But upon peeking her head out the doghouse and being immediately hit with raindrops to her hair, Lucy immediately recoiled back, dried off her hands and hair, and made sure to place Lincoln's photo album in the driest part of Charles' doghouse that she could find. After laying it down on the grass, she told the photo album, "Wish me luck," before softly pecking it.

Lucy then dusted herself off, stood up, and made her way out into the rainy backyard.

After Lucy made it to one of the vents leading into the basement, she quickly scanned her surroundings for any light emanating from the Loud House. When Lucy saw the house apparently dark, she thought to herself, No lights. Alright Lucy, let's get this party started. Lucy quickly opened the hatch and crawled through a narrow passageway before slithering out of the vent into the basement itself. When Lucy saw Luna sleeping and murmuring to herself, "Yes, Mick… I will be your opening act for your World Tour," Lucy thought to herself, perfect. Lucy tiptoed her way through the basement and saw, on the top of a dresser drawer, exactly what she was looking for. She grabbed Luna's guitar chair, stood on top of it, and swiped Luna's piggy bank off the top of her dresser. Once Lucy firmly secured Luna's piggy bank, she clutched it tightly as she tried to sit on the chair as quietly as possible. Lucy then proceeded to empty Luna's piggy bank of all of its contents, some $20 of cash and change, and stuff it in the pockets of her pajama pants. Lucy then escaped into the vent from which she came undetected.

Within 20 seconds of crawling through the vents, Lucy found her next target: her so-called parents. Having remembered the layout of their room, Lucy managed to slither into her parents' room undetected and beelined for what she knew to be the door to their closet. Upon opening the door, Lucy gasped when she saw a fully furnished bathroom, but quickly closed the door. After catching her breath and remembering what she came for, Lucy saw what appeared to be a makeshift closet to her left. She opened the door and found what she was looking for: her parents' savings jug. She quickly emptied the jug of all of its contents, which added up to slightly over $500, before slowly closing the door. After closing the closet door, Lucy saw her parents' wallets on her night table. Despite being tempted, Lucy ultimately decided against stealing money from her parents' wallets. At that moment, she also made the decision to avoid stealing money from any of her family members' wallets, more to avoid suspicion than anything else. Lucy then snuck back into the vent from which she came, completely undetected.

After crawling through the vent system some more, Lucy saw Lori snoring away in her room. Lucy slowly opened the vent, entered Lori's room, and closed the vent, making sure to stay quiet as she did. As Lucy scanned the room, she heard Lori mutter, "Bad luck human pretzel," in her sleep, but this didn't deter her from her goal. Lucy decided to walk to the closet and open it, and found Lori's piggy bank in a hidden, dusty corner. Lucy then ran to Lori's vanity, grabbed her chair, and stood on top of it so she could reach and secure Lori's piggy bank. Like with Luna, Lucy then sat on Lori's chair, completely emptied Lori's piggy bank, and quietly put it back where she found it before also putting Lori's chair back. While Lucy later spotted Lori's wallet on her nighttable, she decided to keep her earlier promise to herself, and snuck back into the vents with an extra $50 in tow.

After doing some more crawling, Lucy spotted her next target: Leni. Lucy climbed into the attic and quietly closed the vent. Fortunately, Leni still looked to be peacefully fast asleep, especially with her pink sleeping mask draped over her eyes. Lucy saw Leni's piggy bank on top of her night table, and tiptoed so as to not cause any floorboards to creak. Leni remained peacefully asleep as Lucy swiped Leni's piggy bank and emptied it of its contents. While Lucy only retrieved $5 from Leni's piggy bank, she still smiled in satisfaction, made sure to carefully put Leni's piggy bank when she found it, stuffed Leni's change into her pockets, and went back into the vents to find her next target.

Within a few seconds, Lucy spotted her next target in Luan. After sneaking into Luan's room without waking her up, Lucy beelined for the closet, and opened it. The memories of Luan's previous pranks caused Lucy to unconsciously shudder as she opened Luan's closet, but she knew she had to put those feelings aside if she was to do what she set out to do. After finding Luan's piggy bank on the top shelf of her closet, Lucy grabbed Luan's director chair to reach for the top shelf and safely secure the piggy bank before emptying it out. Aside from the Loud parents, Luan's piggy bank proved to be the most fruitful she found so far: Lucy made out with around $1000 in cash and change. Despite Lucy's joy at her findings, she managed to quietly follow the same procedure she had used on her other sisters before sneaking back into the vents undetected again. Lucy wiped drops of sweat off her forehead, relieved that for once, she had gotten one over on the house's greatest prankster.

While crawling through the vents, Lucy noticed her pockets audibly jingling, and hoped that it wouldn't arouse anyone in the house to awaken. Fortunately, Lucy quickly spotted Lynn Jr. and Lily sleeping out of the corner of her eyes, and decided to sneak through the vents to steal from them. As Lucy walked through her old room to open the closet Lynn Jr. and Lily shared, bitterness and rage flowed through her veins. But when Lucy saw Marcus Quick posters still littering the walls on Lynn Jr.'s side of the room, she managed to put all that aside. Lucy cracked open the closet door and scattered Lynn Jr.'s sports clothes across the room, wincing in disgust as she did so. Once Lucy made it through Lynn Jr.'s pile of "lucky" sports jerseys, she found Lynn Jr.'s piggy bank, and quickly emptied it of all of its contents. Lucy found only $10 in Lynn Jr.'s piggy bank, but the thought of stealing from her former roommate was more than satisfying enough for her. After closing the closet, Lucy also noticed a block-shaped piggy bank on a nighttable just beyond Lily's crib. Lucy briefly paused before tiptoeing over to Lily's piggy bank, whispering to herself, "Sigh. I'm sorry, Lily, but your sisters brought this upon themselves." Lucy then emptied Lily's piggy bank of all of its contents, around $20, and put the money in her pocket before sneaking back into the vent from which she came undetected.

As Lucy snuck through the vent, she spotted Lola sleeping in her room due to the light emanating from said room. The light was due to Lana working on an ensuite bathroom for Lola, but Lucy didn't know that, and frankly, didn't care. Lucy again managed to sneak into Lola's room undetected before bolting for her closet. Remembering that Lola kept her piggy bank in her toybox, Lucy quickly and quietly took all of Lola's toys out of her toybox before finding Lola's plush piggy bank. When Lucy found Lola's piggy bank, she promptly emptied it of all of its contents, some $500, before making sure to put the piggy bank and all of the toybox's constituent toys exactly where she found them in Lola's toybox. Lucy then made sure to try and carefully close the closet door, but 2 noises startled her into doing so suddenly. The first noise was an extremely loud snore from Lola. The second noise was the rumbling of Lucy's stomach.

Immediately knowing what was about to happen, Lucy ran out of Lola's room and into the main bathroom of the Loud House, turned the light on, and groaned in pain as she expelled diarrhea for the fourth time that night. Lucy tried to control the volume of her cries, but couldn't due to the excruciating pain that she felt. After cleaning herself up, flushing the toilet, and washing her hands, Lucy thought about taking some of the bathroom's supplies for herself before remembering that her sisters also shared said bathroom supplies. So, Lucy decided to turn off the light and jump back into the vents to find her final targets: Lisa and Lana. Lucy saw no one in Lisa and Lana's room, causing her to let out a shocked yet sinister chuckle. Lucy jumped out of the vent and landed on all fours in Lisa's room… only to be met by Lisa, Lana, and the rest of the Loud sisters glaring at her.

Lisa spat, "What do you think you're doing, unlucky sororal unit?"

Lucy admitted, "I had to use the toilet."

Lynn Jr. yelled, "Oh, brother… you're even worse luck than Stinkoln! I bet you clogged that toilet again reading Princess Pony!"

Lucy stammered, "I-I…", before looking down and murmuring, "Sigh."

Lisa scoffed, "Sigh, indeed. I must admit, though, your hypothesis that the removal of yours and our brother unit's possessions from the premises would increase our luck has proven to be the correct one."

Lynn Jr. laughed, "Yeah, spooky! And consider yourself lucky I chose not to break Edwin when I stole your stuff."

Lisa shook her head and scolded Lucy, "But unfortunately, it is time for you to vacate the premises."

Lucy heard the loud clap of thunder in the background and pleaded with the Louds, "Guys… please… let me stay in. There's a rainstorm out there!"

The rest of the Louds panicked and gave Lucy contrived reasons as to why she couldn't stay in their house.

Lisa hypothesized, "Your continued presence in this house could cause all of us to get electrocuted and vaporized by a lightning strike!"

Luna worried, "Our basement could get flooded, too!"

Lana complained, "Yeah, and after everybody else finally has their own rooms!"

Lori begged Lucy, "Get out! Every moment you stay here is literally putting us in more danger!"

Lucy crossed her arms and stood her ground, "I'm not leaving!"

Lisa shook her head in pity, "Poor homo sapien. I'm taking a huge risk to do this, but since the circumstances demand it, I will allow you to meet my robot, Todd. A master of over 20 different martial arts, he also comes with laser vision that disintegrates anything he dislikes, including those he deems 'bad luck." Todd quickly emerged out of Lisa's closet. He had a bucket for a head with a small calculator-like device on his forehead and a monitor at the back of the head, a corkscrew for a neck, a printer for a chest, building toys for arms, a magnet for one hand, a pair of scissors for the other, an old time sound amplifier for the lower body, a large bucket for Lisa to sit and control him with alongside with a fire extinguisher (both located at the back), and a set of bicycle wheels and training wheels for feet.

Todd asked Lisa, "What is your request, master?"

Lisa commanded Todd, "We have a 'bad luck intruder' on the premises. Please escort her away from the premises as soon as possible."

Todd's eyes immediately turned red and pairs of scissors and grabbers and a second magnet were revealed to also be attached to each hand. Todd's voicebox then proclaimed, "INTRUDER ALERT! THREAT DETECTED! BAD LUCK! CODE RED! CODE RED!"

A terrified Lucy pleaded with Lisa, "Sigh, I'll leave! Just don't hurt me!"

Lisa smirked, "Todd, stand down!"

Todd replied, "Yes, master!"

Lisa then commanded the robot, "Activate Sleep Mode!"

Todd responded, "Sleep mode activated!", as the robot turned itself off before Lisa wheeled it back into her closet.

Lucy desperately asked her siblings, "Come on, guys… where am I supposed to go?"

The rest of the Loud siblings said together, "Anywhere but here."

Lucy looked down, replied, "Sigh," and slumped away from the house in defeat. As Lucy walked downstairs, she said to herself, "You know what… maybe it might not be worth it for Lincoln to come back home."

Lucy's despair grew as she continued to walk through the main floor to the backyard. She reflected on all the times she had joined the sister hivemind in ganging up on Lincoln. She tried to justify to herself, "But he lied about bad luck! To get out of spending time with us! This family supports each other, no matter-", before being cut off by a loud clap of thunder and a flash of lightning just as she got ready to open the door back to the backyard. The stormy conditions outside were enough to startle Lucy into realizing exactly what she and her family had forced Lincoln to do during the "luck incident." As Lucy walked back out into the heavy rainstorm, and heard all of the locks on her family's doorways and vents into the house click shut, she said to herself, "Sigh… I sound like a complete psychopath."

Lucy walked back to Charles' doghouse so distraught and depressed that she didn't notice multiple lightning strikes barely missing her. When Lucy finally arrived in Charles' doghouse, tears flowed down her cheeks as she collapsed onto the grass, tightly hugged Lincoln's photo album, and cried herself to sleep as the thunderstorm raged on for the rest of the night.

---

Closing A/N: Happy Easter! Life's been kinda crazy for me this past month and a half, but I'm back! You know, I wasn't originally gonna give Lucy a redemption arc. I was just going to have her be the medium that the spirits use to point out just how fucked the Louds are, given her pre-existing propensity towards superstitions and bad luck. But Saccharine Melody offered to help me fine-tune my revenge schemes against the Loud sisters in exchange for a Lucy redemption arc. When he told me that a Lucy redemption arc would make the other Loud sisters look that much worse by comparison, and pointed out how doing so would rally in-universe moral support towards the co-conspirators, I was interested. Then, Saccharine pointed out that in NSL, Lucy was specifically animated to not derive any joy from the luck incident, and she also never explicitly said anything in the episode itself about Lincoln being bad luck (at least individually). After checking the script and combining it with what I already had planned for Lucy, I realized that Saccharine had a good idea, and from that point on, I was in. I wish I could have focused more on a Lucy redemption arc earlier on, but there were so many Loud sister pranks I had to get through, and I felt that if any sister was to be redeemed, it would be a sign of the endgame, which is why I decided to wait to do it. There were more dangerous/convenient Loud sisters that had to effectively be disarmed first. After doing this, I feel like I had a much better story than I originally did.

A/N 2: The Loud sisters romantically taunting Lucy, and Lucy's response, are meant to be digs at Loudcest.

A/N 3: Yup... the Louds know about Lincoln's nightmare.

A/N 4: Lynn Jr. making Lucy neigh for her is based on that one Black Kyurem fanfic where Chandler jumped on top of Lincoln and tried to ride him like a pony while making him neigh.

A/N 5: The "Ebony Dark Demented Raven" is a My Immortal shoutout. I just had to do it.

A/N 6: Lynn Jr.'s "Stinky stinky stinky" quote comes from a review I got from "GodOfTime".

A/N 7: Lucy's vision in the crystal ball is a shoutout to Saccharine Melody's image of "A Life in Decline" on DeviantArt.

A/N 8: Each of the sisters' money amounts… don't worry. All will be explained later.

A/N 9: Todd's "Intruder Alert"? Shoutout to Squidward's robot house alarm system in SpongeBob!

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With Lucy now exiled from the Loud House, how will the game change? Favorite, follow, and keep reading to find out.