Ch. 5: Exit Adolescence
Hanzo sheepishly approached his father's meeting room, his summoning there was seldom for a fun time. He stood before the closed doors and took a deep breath.
"Hanzo, I know you are outside. Come in."
Does he have laser vision? He thought as he opened the doors.
His father stood straight as a pin with his arms folded neatly behind him as he gazed out a window into the Hanamura sunset. His long, salt and pepper hair tied in an elegant bun on top of his head. Over the years, the wrinkles on his face grew deeper and deeper, almost cavernous now. More often than not, interactions between father and eldest son always felt more transactional than anything, leaving Hanzo anxious in his father's presence.
"Please son, take a seat." Sojiro motioned towards his desk.
"Yes, father."
Sojiro let out a deep sigh, still with his back to Hanzo, "Do you know where Genji, your brother, is?"
I know he's my brother. "The arcade?"
Sojiro turned around to face his son, and stared into Hanzo's soul. Or so it felt, "That's not what I wanted to hear."
Hanzo gulped, shifting nervously in the chair, "Uhm, I'm sorry father." He struggled to maintain eye contact, "Where is he?" Where else could that gremlin be?
Sojiro stepped closer as he exhaled, "It's time we had this conversation, Hanzo. Look me in the eye when I speak to you."
He darted his eyes back up to his father's, now looming over him like the grim reaper would a hospice patient.
"You are 11, while that may seem young you are quickly approaching your duties as the eldest Shimada son. Your days fooling around with Genji are over. One day, I will no longer be here and you must sit on my throne."
This wasn't breaking news to Hanzo, it had always been implied from a young age.
"You will bear the weight of the entire clan. Our family has reigned for centuries and you, my son, were born for this. You will carry our name on."
Sojiro paused.
"Your mother and I are concerned you do not understand the true meaning of this yet."
"I do understand, father." Hanzo leaned towards his father.
Like a switch that flipped, Sojiro's calm yet stern voice changed to an aggressive and sharp tone, "Do you son!? Because your brother is missing."
Hanzo's eyes widened and his stomach dropped. Missing? That's impossible. He's off causing trouble, hiding from us, "How?"
"I was hoping you could tell me that Hanzo. You are his older brother, you are supposed to be a leader! How are we supposed to hand the empire off to you one day if you can't even keep track of your own BROTHER?!" His voice boomed down into the castle halls.
"I-I'm sorry father! I was in class! I tried getting him to come wi–"
Sojiro squeezed his eyes shut, turning his head away from Hanzo, "Stop with the excuses boy, you're telling me you can't even get him to attend his damn classes?"
Is this some sick joke? A test? Is Genji truly missing? Hanzo could feel the tears begin to welling up into his eyes. There's no way he's gone. He desperately tried to not let any roll down his face.
In a brief moment of pity Sojiro lowered his voice, "We have men out in the city looking for your brother. The Shimada clan is the most powerful in all of Japan, there is not a doubt in the world we will find him. The point is, this never should have happened. From now on, you must act as a figure of authority to Genji, he needs discipline. Someone to follow to the right path, to not let him go astray. You will do this."
Hanzo nodded, unable to look at his father.
"You will begin to learn more of how things work around here, I don't know exactly what that will look like but prepare yourself Hanzo, it is time you become a man. You are dismissed."
Hanzo scurried out of the office, his mind in shambles. He darted through the halls and down flights of stairs, arriving in front of Genji's bedroom. He busted the doors open,
"My poor baby!"
There was no Genji, but there was their mother, kneeling before the cot on the ground, her back to Hanzo.
"Where in the world could he be? He's never run off like this!" She wailed.
"Father said we have our men looking in the city, I-I'm sure he will come up soon." Hanzo stood in the doorway, careful not to get too close.
A sudden tone change, from wailing to false comfort,"Oh sweetie, of course your father has the very best men searching every corner for him. I have not a doubt we will find your brother with haste." Hisa turned to look at him, her black eyes encapsulating him,"But it is because of you. Your father has coddled you too long."
Hanzo clenched his fists.
"If you pamper a boar it loses its tusks and becomes a filthy fat pig, ripe for slaughter." Hisa's stare paralyzed the boy, he felt like a fly trapped in a spider's web.
"Look at you, the eldest son of the Shimada clan, with tears rolling down your sweet little cheeks. They used to be so chubby." She gave a soft chuckle, "Pathetic. I knew from the beginning you were weak. I insisted Sojiro start training you for your duties from an earlier age to prevent…" Hisa paused, staring her son up and down, "..This."
He couldn't stop himself. The tears kept pouring from his eyes. Why? Just stop it. Stop it. Stop it. STOP IT!
"Your father insists leaders are made and not born though. I suppose time will tell." The way she looked at own son felt void of empathy. There was no malice in her eyes, there was nothing.
"It's okay sweetie, you can wipe them away. No need to let them drip onto the floor for the servants to wipe. Go clean yourself up, hopefully your brother will be back before bedtime. I would hate to lose my beauty sleep."
His legs felt heavy. He was still in the web.
Hisa's eyes narrowed, "Go."
Snap! The web unraveled, Hanzo turned and ran down the hall, into the safety of his bedroom. Though the web had been cut, his legs shook and felt like jelly. He stumbled into his bathroom, sweat pouring from every pore yet shaking like a small dog. He collapsed in front of the toilet, a knot in his stomach begged to be released. He could feel every heartbeat, he felt like he was dying.
Pull yourself together, what's wrong with you? You are weak. Mother is right. Look at yourself, your brother is missing and you are collapsed on the bathroom floor. You are worthless. You are not a leader. This family will fall because of you. Genji could be hurt because of ME.
"This is my fault." Hanzo reached for the toilet and out the knot came.
After several other hurls, he slumped back down onto the floor. He felt dizzy and closed his eyes.
"Hanzo! Hanzo!" A voice called to him. It sounded distant and muffled, "Hanzo! Can you hear me!?" He opened his eyes, as they focused there was Kiyomi knelt over him, her face smeared with worry.
"Yea, I can." He said softly.
"Oh! We need to get you into bed, you are sick. Come on, let's go." Kiyomi helped him off the ground and into his bed, "I'll get you some water and a wet hand towel. You poor thing." She turned to leave.
"Wait! Kiyomi!"
"Yes Hanzo?"
"Genji? Is he–"
"Yes. Do not worry child, he is back in the castle. I believe in your father's quarters. It is time for you to sleep though, I will be back with what you need." She gave a kind smile and Hanzo breathed a sigh of relief.
He's safe. It's okay. He's okay.
Hanzo pulled his blankets over him, for now he was safe from what lurked outside. The blankets were his shield and he could finally rest.