Freedom 18
The relief was written all over Alex's face, as Amy opened the door in front of Oscar's lake house. Under normal circumstances, Oscar and June would at least rush out and greet them, probably Nora too. But these were far from normal circumstances. A fact that when Amy grabbed Alex and Cash followed with Henry, physically guarding Henry's body into the house through the utility side door, rather than the folding doors off the kitchen.
"MIJOS!" Oscar shouted, in relief. He had gone to meet them as soon as he'd heard the car pull in. He was eager to lay his eyes on the boys. Oscar grabbed Alex and pulling him into a tight hug, as soon as he laid eyes on his son in the utility room. He immediately pulled back slightly from Alex to pull Henry into the hug too. The sounds of the footsteps in the hallway alerted Oscar to everyone else's incoming presence. He hadn't told anyone their expected ETA, except Bea. She had been there when Amy had notified him. Oscar felt Henry move to comfort Alex from within his embrace and Amy's words came back to him. He pulled back and cupped his son's face. "Mijo? You're okay now."
Henry and Oscar exchanged a look over the top of Alex's head, as he went back in for a second hug with his dad. The cacophony of the triad was now fully apparent. Especially June, who had marched right up to her father and flung herself at Alex's back. June looked over at Henry, feeling Alex's back rumbling beneath her.
"Henry!" Bea greeted him, excitedly and held him close, hugging her little brother as soon as Oscar had released Henry. Bea could see worry written on Henry's face, and a glance towards Alex confirmed her suspicions. He was worried about Alex.
"Alex?" June whispered softly, still holding onto him from behind in a hug. Her voice must have broken through Alex's thoughts because he instantly broke the hug with his father, in favor of hugging his big sister. "You're okay, thank God."
"Bug." Alex sobbed and he finally let his tears fall. By the time that June had managed to get the two of them seated, she looked up and Henry had finished hugging Pez, Nora and had hugged Oscar again. As Alex's sobs wracked his body, she caught Henry's eye with a questioning look. He gave her a small sad sigh and left it at that. He'd talk to June about it all later.
"As much fun as this reunion is, may I suggest we all get some dinner. The boys are probably starving." Oscar interrupted the reunion. He had been concerned. Although he could see the exhaustion laced on both of their faces, he had been worried when he had seen Alex practically fall apart in June's arms. Keeping on his happy face, Oscar and Bea ushered everyone to the table where the food that he and Henry's sister, Bea, had prepared. "June, Nora and Pez, you three are on clean up duty. Bea and I cooked." He informed them before he and Bea started unwrapping all of the food they had made.
Throughout dinner, there were many questions. A lot of questions and Shaan had been the one to gently suggest that they wait until Alex and Henry have had some proper rest in a safe space. Nora and Pez hastily agreed while Bea and June exchanged worried looks with Oscar and Shaan. So instead, the conversation turned to Pez, as he updated everyone on his latest philanthropic endeavors.
As soon as dinner was done and Henry was taking Alex to his bedroom, June gave Nora and Pez a shove towards the kitchen with the promise to be not too far behind them. Once her and Bea were alone with Oscar and Shaan, June debated what to say. But Bea did not. "What the ever-loving fuck happened to Alex?" Bea demanded, staring holes into Shaan. "Alex is not normally like this. This is more Henry's MO."
"He was like that when I arrived." Shaan admitted with a small sigh. He too, knew this was out of character for the First Son. "Henry told me that when everything went down Alex stayed calm. Almost too calm. Henry said he managed to keep him calm, and Alex was fine through the whole ordeal. Until he realised they were safe, then Alex seemed to fall apart."
"That's not like Alex." Oscar added, looking carefully to June for confirmation. June bit her lip, she didn't say a word. She remembered a time, a long, long time ago when Alex had been exactly like this. When too many nights Alex had clung to her for dear life. Afraid. Scared. Full of blaming himself for everything that was wrong in his world. Even things that weren't his fault. "CJ? What is it?"
"Ah ... " She hesitated. She didn't want to betray Alex's trust, but she knew he needed help. Probably more help than her, Henry or Oscar could provide. He had needed help last time and last time she had managed to get it for him. That help wasn't available now. Her best friend Jennifer's mom, Jess. She was a psychologist and had done June a favour, in exchange for June tutoring Erica, Jennifer's kid sister in English, History and Geography. Jess had helped Alex out and he'd eventually gone back to his usual self. But Jennifer's mom wasn't here now and as far as she knew, Jess had never told their mom about Alex. "Alex has been like this before."
"What?!" Oscar asked in a harsh tone, sucking an equally harsh breath, hard. He couldn't remember anything like this ever happening in his son's life.
"When you left for California, and Alex came home from summer camp. You were gone. Didn't see you leave." June started softly. "When he realised you left, without saying goodbye. He shut down. He pretended to be indifferent when Mom was around, but you could see the toll it took on him. But as soon as she'd leave, or we were alone, he'd shut back down. He would sometimes cry, but mostly it was silent panic and anxiety. He blamed himself for a lot of things that weren't his fault."
"What the fuck, CJ? Why didn't I know about this?" Oscar asked, his tone angry, but not at June. Not directly, he was angrier at being left in the dark. "Why didn't anyone tell me? Does your mom know? Why ..?"
"Because Alex didn't want anyone to know!" June snapped at her father. "You weren't here, you were gone. Packed up and moved out west, making a new life for yourself away from us. Mom was busy with her campaign for the Speaker of The House. We tried, we both tried to tell you both. But you could never talk when we called, and mom was never home. She'd just started seeing Leo and we didn't know him well enough to go to him for help. I managed to get him help and he worked hard to get it under control."
"What did you do?" Bea asked June, quietly. She had been feeling the tension between June and her father. "I mean, how did you ...?"
"I had a friend. A close friend, I trusted. Her mom was psychologist." June admitted, deliberately not looking at her father. Oscar knew why June would not meet his eye. "Since then, Alex has had this tendency to think that just him existing pisses people off. That he is the reason people don't like us, threaten us. That it's his mere existence that makes people target Mom, Dad, Nora ... me, even Henry. Of course, if I knew then what I know now, I'd never have asked her to help Alex." Her last sentence was pointedly directed at Oscar and hissed in a low, harsh, nasty voice.
Bea looked on, confused. You could cut the tension between June and her father with a knife, it was that thick. Shaan had a gut feeling that the woman, the mom of June's friend may have possibly been the reason that Oscar had left his family in the first place, but he didn't say anything. He kept on in silence. "It seems like you've done the best you could in the past June, " Shaan said softly, comforting the Claremont-Diaz woman. "But perhaps we get Zahra to vet someone for Alex to talk to."
"Wha ... what did Jess diagnose Alex with?" Oscar managed out in a low, strangled voice. He wasn't bothering to disguise the hurt in his voice anymore. Or the worry.
"Selective mutism brought on by anxiety, and some other underlying factors." June snapped back at Oscar. Normally her and Oscar were close, but the anger that had been simmering at her in regard to how he treated Alex was getting the better of her.
"What? What underlying factors?" Oscar demanded to know.
"Undiagnosed ADHD and abandonment issues." A new voice answered him from the hallway that led to the bedrooms. "He was diagnosed with ADHD three months ago. Sorry. I just came out for some water. June, I appreciate you trying to help Alex. I really do, truly. But it's my job to take care of him now. Let Nora take care of you, you deserve a break." Henry turned and looked Oscar in the eye. Shaan and Bea were impressed with the backbone and courage that Henry was showing. "I've just got off the phone with Zahra. She is organizing an appointment with Dr Carmen Garcia for Alex, through Skype for tomorrow morning at 10am. I will be sitting nearby for support; just in case he needs someone. He doesn't want anyone else there. Carmen was the doctor who Georgetown referred him to after the email leaks. She is the one who referred him on for the assessments for ADHD. He and her have an established doctor patient relationship and there is already a lengthy NDA in place."
"Thank you." June said, hugging Henry. "I don't know how you managed to convince Alex to speak to someone. But thank you."
"I have my ways." Henry said softly, not meeting anyone's eye. "I need to get to bed myself. But all of you please, don't worry. We are safe now. In time, Alex will be ok, again. June, Oscar, you both need to let go of the anger and blame towards one another. Trust me, it's not worth it."
As quick as Henry appeared was as quick as he had disappeared, water bottle in his hand. "Dad and Henry quarreled right before Dad passed." Bea hurriedly explained. "No one knows over what, and they did make up before he passed. But fighting always puts Henry on edge now."
All was silent in the house finally, as Oscar sat on his bed, wearily. He had thought that with Alex and Henry returning, he would fall into bed tonight peaceful and happy. That was not the case. Arguing with June, Alex silent and feeling broken and Henry telling June that it was his job to care for Alex, that had been three things that had not been on Oscar's bingo card for the evening.
He really wanted to call Ellen. But he wasn't sure he could face her harsh criticism, either. She didn't exactly know about Jess and even though, nothing ever happened between him and June's friend's mom, it would still open a can of worms. Ellen would be hurt, and they were finally at a place in their relationship where they could be in the same room and not argue immediately. Well, they still bickered. But compared to when they couldn't even be in the same state, it was a drastic improvement on where they were when they divorced.
He laid back and sighed to himself. He had known when he'd packed up and left for California that it was the cowards way. But he hadn't been strong enough to face Alex. He hadn't wanted to see the look of hurt and devastation on his face.
A knock at the door interrupted him out of his reverie, calling out a brief come in, Oscar braced himself for a second wave of June's anger. "Henry?" He asked, seeing the shy man lingering at his doorway. "Alex? Is everything ok?"
"He... You need to come see this." Henry answered, abstractly.
Following Henry down the hallway to Alex's room, Henry opened the door and there was Alex laying his bed, sobbing in his sleep. Tears stained his face and his eyes were red. Oscar could barely make out the words coming from Alex's mouth in his sleep. He was rocking and crying.
"Don ... don't leave me." Alex hiccupped softly, as he pleaded in his sleep beginning to get agitated. "Pa, please. I'll do better, I promise."
Oscar's heart broke all over again right there. Alex had only ever called him Pa when he had been sick or hurt. Oscar felt like the guilt was eating him alive. He had made the wrong choices in his life and now, Alex was paying the price. "Alex." Oscar whispered, coming to sit beside him on the bed. Oscar was stroking his thumb over Alex's forehead in an effort to settle him. "Alex, it's Pa's. I'm here, now. You're safe, now."
He noticed that Henry had climbed back under the covers and was trying to physically comfort Alex from behind him. Alex had calmed under his touch and when he had pulled back, Alex had become distressed again. "Come on, Alex. C'mere." Henry murmured to him, pulling Alex closer to him to give Oscar more room on the king size bed.
"Thanks for coming and getting me, Henry." Oscar said, sincerely. He could see the worry lines and exhaustion on the young prince's face. "I can stay in here tonight and you can get some sleep in my bed if you like. Get some real sleep, I've got Alex."
Henry shook his head no. He couldn't. He wasn't leaving Alex's side. Alex had abandonment issues from his childhood that caused problems now and Henry knew, he had added to them, more than once before. The last time they were all here together, when he'd fled back to London in the middle of the night, was probably the worst of it. It was something the two of them had discussed and worked through with Lucia and Carmen, their individual therapists. Nope, he was staying put. He had meant what he had said to June, earlier on tonight. It was his turn to look after and care for Alex.
Oscar had thought Alex was in a deep sleep and had tried to pull away again from Alex. Alex had immediately become unsettled, calling out for Oscar. Henry climbed out of bed and pulled down the spare pillow from the top shelf of the built in robe and tossed it at Oscar. He caught it deftly. "Guess you can sleep on the other side of Alex." Henry quipped and climbed back into bed to maneuver Alex into the centre of the bed to allow room for Oscar to lay beside his son and keep him calm. "Not that either of us will be getting much sleep tonight."