Back with chapter 58, sorry for the wait.

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"Hey, where the hell were you yesterday, I was trying to call you. Nick said to Fin as he arrived at the crime scene.

"I got held up at Amanda's and then there was a victim that I had to meet up with at Barba's. I saw you called, I just didn't have a minute to get back to you, everything alright? It's not Liv is it? I went by a little while ago, she seems to be dealin."

"Things are so out of control, but no. She's holding on in spite of everything. I tell you, that is one strong woman!"

"That she is! Dealin with this arrest on top of everything else...at least she got the good news about Serena to fall back on!"

"Yeah, good news only if Mrs. Cassidy doesn't snatch Serena away. What the hell is wrong with that woman?"

"Grief and plain old bitchiness! But I know you, you didn't try to call me more than once to tell me this, had to be another reason; spill it."

"I got a date!" He said, smiling as he and Fin put on gloves so they wouldn't contaminate the scene.

"If your talking about her, she must be somebody more serious than the usual chicks you run through, so who is it?" He asked as they went under the police tape that cordoned off the ragged, old playground that was being torn down, and where a naked man and woman were found tied to the broken down monkey bars with burns all over their body.

"Her name's Carolyn- I'll fill you in later. What do we got here?" He asked the officers.

"Hold on..." Joanie said to whomever she was talking to on the phone and muted the device before turning around to address the painter. "On second thought, I want the walls mint green with a peppermint-pink and white border, can you do that? Oh, and maybe some carousels painted on as a backsplash?" Joanie said as she went over the plans for the baby's room. She had to get it ready, the baby would be with her soon, she thought and there was zero time to waste.

"Anything you want as long as you're payin!" The painter said. "How bout we do a mural wit her name in real big letters, like, I don't know, birds can be holdin ribbon or somethin?" Although Lou meant nothing by it, that comment left Joanie feeling some kind of way. She didn't know her own grand daughter's name she suddenly realized and that made her even more angry at Olivia.

"Well, I don't actually; you know what?" She said, trying to save face. "Let me think about that and I'll get back to you. But in the meantime you go ahead and do what we discussed and I'll get back to you."

"Whateva you say!" He decided and went back to work while Joanie returned to her phone call.

"James? Now, about the carpet…"

"I know you wanted to see her, but they say she's just too fragile, Liv, they're not letting anyone in. I'm sorry, but I tried."

Olivia lay there in her bed, halfway sitting up and nursing Serena, half listening to Elliot. She was just so exhausted! She'd tried time and time again to get some sleep but time and time again she was haunted by Harlan and real dreams of last Summer in that house. Dreams from just days ago in Bronwyn's house and they scared her to death! Now as she fed Serena, she was sleepy and cranky, and half in, half out of sleep with so much on her mind. "She's fragile?!" She thought.

"Liv, did you hear me?" He asked. He was so worried about her. It seemed like each day, something new had been piled on her; the rape and Harlan's murder, the arrest, and now the custody suit. It should have been a joyous occasion, her finding out that Brian is Serena's father but with his mother trying to take her away... Hell, who's he kidding? She'd be in the exact same boat if Brian were awake.

"I heard you." She said, listlessly. "El, I'm a good mother to Serena; I mean, the judge will think so, right? ...unless I'm in jail by the time I leave here, then he or she won't need convincing. Joanie will just walk away with my child."

"Liv honey, you gotta stop thinking that way! You have been the best mother to this child for months before she even got here. And in just the few days she has been here you've been incredible in spite of all you've had to deal with."

"They can't take her away from me El." She said as she looked down at her daughter who had finished feeding and was fast asleep. "I'm her mother and I love her; that has to count for something!"

"It does Liv, it counts for more than you know." And he kissed her head while she took Serena from her breast and kissed her, letting her relax on her chest.

"El?"

"Yeah?"

"Could you lay with me? I still can't close my eyes without…"

"I think sleep is exactly what we need." He said and got in bed with her, putting his arm around her and she quickly cuddled against him with Serena in her arms. "I don't want you to worry, I promise you, it's gonna be alright!"

Except he wasn't sure if he believed it.

Friday arrived and the doctor finally cleared Olivia to go home but with the arrest, she wasn't allowed to leave until Phillips sorted out her transport issues. He wanted her to be taken directly to the tombs until Monday when she would see a judge and be arraigned and hopefully denied bail and he had been hanging around the hospital all morning, hoping to achieve just that but he had been having problems getting it done.

Elliot meanwhile was on the phone calling his attorney and trying desperately to keep away from Stanley Phillips while Olivia sat in her room, she and the baby ready to go and just thinking about everything. She still hadn't been able to see Bronwyn, save for the window outside of her room but when suddenly she died from her injuries, Olivia couldn't help but feel somewhat happy. All the hell that woman put her through starting with William, she was glad to see her go and felt it was another horrible chapter closed that someday her baby wouldn't have to live through. As she watched Serena, one of the rare times she was awake, she smiled at her as Serena looked up at her.

"We're finally going home today and momma's so happy! I just pray that with all that's happening, this isn't the end of us baby girl; I feel like even if one problem is solved, the other is still up in the air and I don't know what I'd do if I were ever separated from you!"

Elliot told her that he'd take care of the arrest and that she shouldn't worry but here it was, Friday morning, Phillips was outside just waiting to instruct them to lock her up and she'd have to appear in court next week to be arraigned and still nothing. She was starting to think that maybe she should be worried.

"He said he'd handle it, trust him." Sealview said, sitting in the chair opposite her.

"Why are you here?" Olivia said, holding her little one and rocking her to sleep but Serena started to fuss, wanting milk instead of sleep.

"That's a nice way to greet yourself! God we did good with her didn't we? She's absolutely beautiful!" She smiled as Olivia began undoing the buttons on her blouse.

"I think so" Olivia smiled, still looking down at Serena. "What are you doing here?" She asked Sealview.

"Just wanted to remind you" Beach House said when she suddenly appeared. "Who ever thought that Brian would make such a gorgeous baby?! Anyway, have faith in El, he'll come through, he always does!"

"What if he doesn't?" Olivia asked, undoing her bra and feeding Serena. "What if he can't"

"Like we said, have faith!" Beach house said.

"Have faith? I'm sitting here conversing with two of my past selves; sometimes I wonder just how sane I am."

"Oh relax, you're perfectly sane!" Sealview told her. "Remember, we came out of need because you would have cracked up all those months in that house if we wouldn't have; now we're just here here to remind you of the important stuff when you let yourself get in the way!"

"Is that what I'm doing?"

"It is indeed. Now relax, nurse our baby and let El handle this." Beach house said. "He'll come though!"

Outside, Phillips had gone off to make calls while Elliot stood outside of Olivia's room, talking to the guard after getting off the phone with his lawyer.

"If it's any consolation, I'm really sorry about all of this!" The young man said with sadness in his eyes. He didn't want to be a part of this but what could he do with Phillips being his superior?

"It's okay Anderson, I don't blame you. You're just following directions." He said as his phone rang and he looked at the display to see that it was a restricted number. "Excuse me, I need to take this. Stabler!"

"Special Agent Stabler, I have Assistant Director Summers for you, please hold!" The man's voice said and Elliot's heart leapt in his chest to his throat and settled down before he was connected with the assistant director.

"Elliot, first let me apologize for the wait." A.D. Summers atoned. "I'd make small talk but I have the feeling that it's urgent so I won't make you wait any longer. What can I do for you?"

"I'm sure you've heard about Harlan Lewis." Elliot started, he had a lot to tell the man!

"I always did hate goin to these funerals!" Fin said as he put on the jacket to his uniform.

"Tell me about it. Kinda makes you think about your own mortality. Nick said just as Murphy came out of his office, dressed in his blues just a Fin and Nick were, to attend Darrell's funeral.

"Lieutenant." Fin greeted.

"Seems like we just got him and now we're burying him!" Murphy said sadly. "I wish we had time to get to know him better but we gave to be strong for Rollins.

"Speaking of, we'd better get going Nick, she's waiting on us. I'll see you there." He told Murphy then he and Nick left.

At the hospital, Phillips was heading back to Olivia's room, and on cloud 9! He'd gotten a case that would bring headlines and he'd be taking that bitch down in the process, life couldn't be better as far as he was concerned!

He thought of everything that had transpired over the last several months, Harlan's capture and eventual "death" in Pennsylvania, he would have tried to take action then but it was too risky. He was supposed to be in Harlan's, well back then, he knew the man as Lucius' and he was to be part of the third group.

He had spent weeks traveling to Pennsylvania, all under a cloud of secrecy. Meeting with Holmes and Doc and working out the details. He was a newbie to this and they had to be sure about him before they took him in. Finally when they learned they could, he was supposed to be the next. The woman-hating, psycho, son of a bitch was just weeks away from his dream. Sure, he'd raped women before Olivia and then he'd have to go through the process of reminding them that he could get to them no matter where they ran; in some cases, kill them. But this, this was what he'd waited for; him and eleven other men, using this bitch all night long until it couldn't take anymore; he'd dreamed of it, counted down to it and the bitch had to ruin it, killing Harlan and escaping before it could happen and jeopardizing everything and since he didn't know back then if he was in any way implicated so he opted instead to take a loss and sit it out.

He remembered when he heard that most of the men involved had been caught; the majority of them settled for plea bargains. Chumps. He thought. He would have been proud to do that slit; no backtracking and saying I'm sorry like a whiney bitch! The way he figured, if you did a whore and got caught, (though, praise God, he hadn't been yet) own it! Look that slut right in the eye while looking the judge in the eye and let it be known that for that point in time, you owned that bitch!

But to find out that Harlan had in fact lived and it; Olivia had killed him...really killed him, well that was just too much for Phillips and there had to be consequences while he made it look like he was just doing his duty as a law enforcement agent; rancid bitch! "I'll fuck you one way or the other!" He mumbled to himself as his phone rang and he was suddenly brought out of his blaming reverie. "Agent Phillips… Yes, A.D. Summers, hello sir." This is it, he's gonna promote me! He thought to himself, so full of excitement, he could barely keep it together. "Well sir, I happen to be at Southampton right now, I'm waiting to take her in!" He said proudly, with his chest puffed out.

"Tell me something Phillips, what made you think that the bureau would be interested in arresting Sergeant Benson for Harlan Lewis' murder?"

"Sir?"

"I was just in a meeting with your bosses and the Director after I was done talking to Special Agent Stabler."

"You…" His face began to crumble. He'd lied to Elliot when he said he'd had permission from the people upstairs, right now being on the phone with the people upstairs and he was scared to death.

"I was. And we, after I talked to Special Agent Stabler and got your bosses together, along with the director, well we just can't fathom what would make you think that Sergeant Benson's arrest is something that we would even be remotely interested in pushing for!" A.D. Summers said in a firm tone, obviously angry.

"I- I just assumed-"

"Harlan Lewis evaded us twice over 20 years, both times by faking his death!"

"Yes, I…"

"...and you really thought that highlighting his actual death after he'd caused so much destruction, after he'd kidnapped and raped Sergeant Benson yet again and she killed him defending her unborn child…"

"I thought…"

"A child whom she was about to give birth to at any minute; you choose that case?"

"Well see, I…"

"And after Agent Austin had taken her statement and basically cleared her of any wrongdoing. This is the case that you chose to pursue? A case that we'd pretty much closed?"

"Sir...if you'll allow me to explain, I know what you're thinking, and I just-"

"Oh you have no idea what I'm thinking, but you will! I want you in my office yesterday and don't make the mistake of keeping me waiting!" And just that fast, he hung up leaving Phillips in a state of sheer terror.

"Maybe you should save it for somebody that gives a damn!" Elliot said laughing. "Chop chop Phillips, time is money!"

Of all the things that she could've done with her life; up until she was fifteen, her mother was sure that she would have been a prima ballerina and it wasn't just a case of momma wishing that her daughter had more talent than she actually did. No, Olivia had a true gift for dance and had three of the finest ballet academy's competing for her. But then one night, while trying to put Serena to bed, Olivia took a misstep and Serena ended up falling down on her and broke her leg! While she was healing, Olivia decided that she was somewhat relieved. Of course Serena felt horrible for what had happened but Olivia, she didn't really want to dance in the first place, she did it to make her mother happy all those years and was ecstatic that she couldn't dance those nine weeks, feigning difficulty once she was healed and eventually her mother just let the whole thing go.

After the ballet dream was over, Serena tried to get her to follow her lead into English studies but between running the school newspaper and being class president, plus homecoming queen, Olivia had too many roads to choose from and English just wasn't one of those roads. After a lot of thinking, she'd decided early in her senior year that she would devote herself to law enforcement. She had the grades and the smarts and parlayed that into a full scholarship to college; from there, she got herself into law school where she planned to specialize in rape crimes, much to her mother's appreciation but then right before graduation, something called to her and she decided that she would still dedicate herself to law enforcement, but she wanted to be on the other side of it. And as soon as she graduated with her law degree, Olivia went to the police academy where she graduated top of the class and got her detective's shield after only two years on the force.

Sufficed to say, Serena wasn't very pleased and constantly begged Olivia to get out of the department but Olivia felt as if this was her calling and when she got into the Special Victim's Unit, she knew that she would truly make a difference, and she did. Sixteen years in that unit and she'd helped so many victims, feeling a personal connection to each case. Her mom had been a rape victim, she, the product of the attack and she guessed it was what made her work twice as hard as anyone else to bring justice to every case. That was, until her world began to be turned upside down!

She thought that when she encountered Lowell Harris, that would be the most terrifying thing that ever happened to her but then she met William Lewis and then a year later, his father. And as much as the son turned her life upside down, it was the father that made her question everything she thought she knew and actually wish that she had never become a cop! The things he did to her were truly horrific, what he allowed his friends to do to her; why didn't she listen to her mother and just get out of the madness that was police work? She would have been successful at anything she set her mind to so why this? She could have been happy as an English professor or a lawyer or even a senator, and most importantly, she never would have met William, or Harlan Lewis. Looking at her own daughter, she understood exactly what her mother meant. She would literally rather jump off a cliff than to see her baby grow up and head into a career such as this, one that can only bring her heartache.

"Home at last!" She heard Elliot say and looked out her window of the SUV, after four days in the hospital, she'd finally come home. It was sunny in spite of the snow that was piled around the sidewalks but when she looked up and saw it, their home, she suddenly felt safer and gave a smile at seeing it as he parked there in front.

"Look Serena, we're home baby!" She whispered to her daughter who had just woken. Since Carolyn told her the news even in spite of the other part shadowing it, she felt hopeful. The arrest was finally something she could put behind her and that made all the difference in the world.

"You okay?" Elliot asked as he came around to the back seat, again interrupting her thoughts.

"I'm better now." She said, truthfully. Even in spite of the FBI leading and followed them home to see to it that they got there safely as a favor from the director.

"Come on, let's get you two inside!" He said, deciding to ignore the horse and pony show and try to enjoy Olivia's homecoming.

They hadn't been there long when Serena needed to be fed and Olivia immediately went to it, sitting down on the pillowy loveseat in her room. God, it felt so good to be home! She thought, enjoying the quiet as Serena nursed when suddenly, her mind drifted again.

She'd woken up in the middle of the night feeling terribly sick and found herself with her head in the toilet heaving violently as her stomach contents gushed forth. She'd thrown up three times before she dragged herself back to bed, feeling somewhat better but at the crack of dawn she felt even worse and the vomiting was more severe and her mind began racing, this wasn't like when she thought she might have been a couple months ago based on nothing more than a late period; this time, along with the late period, her breasts were sore, she was tired all the time and now the vomiting. She didn't need a test to confirm what she already knew but was in denial about…

"Liv; honey, did you hear me?"

"No. I… I'm sorry." She said, lying there on the loveseat. Her mind was so preoccupied, she'd barely remembered that he was even in the room.

"I said, what would you like to eat."

"I'm not hungry."

"Liv, we've talked about this. You're breastfeeding babe, you have to eat."

"El really, I'm just not hungry."

"How about I make you a smoothie? Huh? Berry, your favorite." She cracked a slight, half-smile in spite of how lousy she felt. She saw how hard he had been trying and she felt bad that she hadn't been too receiving and decided to make an effort.

"Okay. A berry smoothie."

"Okay" he said happily and kissed her. "I'll be back." Once he left the room, she peered down at Serena and signed, remembering when she first discovered that Serena was inside her and how she tried everything to tell herself that it wasn't true. She'd honestly thought that Harlan had fathered her and now, she still couldn't believe that she was Brian's! Nick had told her that Harlan had been behind it, that he'd been the reason that Brian was in this condition, the reason he might die and she couldn't help but blame herself. If she'd never gotten so upset with Brian, he wouldn't have wandered right up to that maniac that night.

"At least I don't have to worry about going to jail. I was so scared that they'd take me away and I'd be away from you, then your grandmother… We have a lot to thank Elliot for." She said, holding Serena's hand while she ate. "Now if we could only get your grandmother to let me see your father; I want so much for you to meet him. He's holding on but I'm not sure how much… I'm sorry that it turned out this way." She apologized to her daughter. "I'm sorry that I couldn't make you being born the greatest thing that ever happened for everyone involved. You went from being that monsters, to being Brian's overnight but we don't know if he'll make it, and your grandma wants to take you away from me and I wish that I could've made this so much better for you! But, you're my miracle, and no matter what, you are the single greatest thing that has ever happened to me! No matter what happens, you just remember that, ok? Just remember it and hold on to it!" She said as her tears fell.

Over at Nick's…

"Oh my god!" Carolyn screamed as Nick was on her back and fucking her with utter abandon. "OH GOD! I'm cumming again… Baby, don't stop!" She cried, the chances of that being slim to none as Nick was in a zone and fucking her hard and deep and her being in a complete state of euphoria! Nick had fucked her through four orgasms and the fifth was well on it's way as Nick just laughed.

"Didn't think I could tear this ass up proper?" He said as he fucked her but she was so far gone, her eyes just rolled up into her head as she fell down flat.

"Ohhhhhhhhhhhh my goddddddd!" She screamed as he started to rub her clit and she came undone, squirting all over the sheets as the orgasm took her and she thrashed about, crying while she came! "Ohhhh fuck you! Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you!" She shouted over and he finally exploded into the condom he wore, coming hard.

"Oh shit… Oh shit!" He cried as the pushed up into her hard 3 of 4 times until he was done then collapsed on top of her breathing hard before he rolled off. His dick still hard as he pulled off the condom and tossed it.

"We're not done yet papi!" She said as she took him in her mouth.

"Damn, you recover quick!" He said, in gasping breaths as she smiled, sucked his softening cock to a stiff one again and taking him fully down her throat.

This one was definitely worth keeping around.

"Thanks so much for calling Liv." Amanda said.

"I'm just sorry that I couldn't be there, how're you holding up?" Olivia asked her.

"I should be asking you that question!"

"Uh; I guess we both have some healing to do."

"I know you must be exhausted so I'll let you go. Besides, I need to say goodbye to some guests… I will… You too Liv, bye!" She said before she hung up then just as quick she threw up in the kitchen sink and was thankful that nobody saw it, still not sure how she would break her pregnancy news to everyone.

At the hospital, Brian had suffered another seizure and this one was the worst of them. The doctors having to stop his tremors four times before they got them under control and now as they examined him, it was pretty much a hopeless cause as the doctors and nurses emerged from his room.

"Doctor Miles…" Joanie said, immediately walking over to him from where she sat outside his room. "You stopped the seizures, how is he?" The look in her eyes was hopeful. The doctor gated when they were hopeful because that made his job so much harder.

"Mrs. Cassidy…"

"Joanie. Please, it's Joanie." She said nervously but the doctor looked at her, unsure of how to proceed and finally decided to just tell her.

"Joanie… is there someone that you could call?"

"Call? Why would I…?" Dr. Miles looked around, scratching his neck. "No, there's no one." Damnit, another thing he hated! Everyone should have somebody in times like this; he hated giving news like this when the family members were all alone to receive it.

"Do you remember when I discussed your son's condition with you?"

Later as Serena slept, Olivia and Elliot lay in Olivia's bed, both of them worn out with Olivia curled up in his arm. The last week had been so strenuous with everything that happened, and now, it was nice to just be home and relax. And when she looked at Serena, sleeping peacefully on Elliot's chest, she could see how much he loved her baby. She thought of that conversation she'd had with herself earlier and had hope that things would be okay.

"First day home, how does it feel?" He asked, dozing off.

"Surreal. It's been almost five days and I can't believe she's here." She said as she rubbed the back of Serena's head. "I can't believe that I ever thought I could give her up!"

"What's important is you didn't. I already can't imagine my life without her."

"You know, I never got a chance to thank you for what you did. Getting me out of that mess with Phillips; I thought that I'd have to leave her… I know that I haven't said it enough El, but thank you!"

"Don't you know by now, I'd do anything in the world for the two of you."

"Oh yeah, can you make Joanie disappear?"

"I'm workin on it!" He laughed and she kissed him, sweet and heartfelt on the lips for a moment before she pulled away.

"What would you say to me moving in with you when I'm healed enough to handle the stairs?"

"I'd ask are you sure? I want it like you wouldn't believe but I also don't want you to do anything before you're ready."

"I'm ready; I don't know if when these six weeks are up if I'll be ready to make love again but these last few days…" She said with tears in her eyes, but they were happy tears. "Yeah, I'm ready!"

Before he could say anything, his phone vibrated and he hurried to answer it before it woke the baby. "Perfect timing." He joked before he looked at the call screen and answered. "Hey Honey...what, now? Yeah…" He put the phone to his chest. "Up for some company?" He asked Olivia.

"I thought that I could get away with just a tee shirt! Of course, I'd love the company!"

"Well that's good, Mo, Kathleen and Lizzie are about 3 blocks away and they are just dying to see you and Serena… Yes Mo, its fine! Okay. I'll see you soon!" and he hung up and turned to Olivia.

"You sure you're ready for visitors?"

"They're not visitors, they're family and yes, I'm sure." She said and pulled herself out of bed to put on a pair of pajamas, shutting the bathroom door.

He couldn't help but love that woman even if he didn't know that she was on the other side of the bathroom door crying!

More to come, but in the meantime I'd love a review.