Chapter 71 -
*Trigger warning*
*Please read this chapter with caution. It contains rape and violence.*
.
The night passed without a wink of sleep for Amanda and now here she was in her kitchen at just after five in the morning having that one cup of coffee she allows herself daily.
She still couldn't believe what happened and asked herself all night if she had heard what she thought she did? Over and over again, she told herself that there was no way that she couldn't have because it would mean that Eugenia had lied to her face about dying, and nobody could be that heartless!
Darrell's mom and sisters made their way to Manhattan when the twins were first born. But since they were two months old, Amanda had made it her business to take them to DC every month! Even now, she never tried to keep any of Darrell's family away, so why would Eugenia do this?
"No," she said aloud to herself. "...she wouldn't." She was still trying unsuccessfully to convince herself that she hadn't heard them bragging, unashamed about their plan. As much as she wanted to deny it, it happened, it was real, and she now had a choice to make with how she would handle it as she sat at the counter, staring at her mug. She knew one thing if nothing else, she had to apologize to Fin.
…
It was quiet all through the house in the middle of the night when she was woken from her sleep. Lying there in the dark she listened as the sound of footsteps- Harlan's footsteps made their way through the hall and her heart began to beat faster as his heavy boots got closer.
"Please God...!" She prayed silently as tears fell down her face, only to find that it was in vain as she heard the locks on the door opening one by one until the door creaked open. She listened to the sound of his belt buckle coming undone, then his zipper sliding down, and finally, denim rustling as he pushed his pants down his legs…
"Wake up, you fuckin whore!" Harlan said as he threw back the covers and grabbed her legs, flipped her onto her stomach, and pulled her to him.
She jumped awake, her heart beating so fast she felt that it would jump out of her chest. As she looked around her, in the darkness of the room she realized where she was; home. Her home that she shared with her family. Her beautiful children sleeping soundly beside her and their father. She needed the calming effects of her little family right now. Even if in their slumber, they didn't know that they were saving her from drowning right now.
She could feel the memories of that night. Honestly, she thought she had buried them a long time ago. She had no idea that when she woke up in that bedroom so long ago what would be forced upon her for months to follow. She'd never known that anyone could be as evil as Harlan was, and she had survived William, but this man was a different breed, and William couldn't keep up with Harlan on his best day.
She still saw his face whenever she closed her eyes, and two years later she still remembered his smell...his touch. Now, as if it weren't enough, those recordings that he made might be played in court, possibly in front of a jury. She'd avoided it more than a couple of times because of plea bargains, but she doubted that this man, Abernathy, would take that route. Ever since Barba told her that there were children involved, she knew that this man was a different breed.
She checked to make sure Serena was covered. This child never slept in the very expensive bed that she had. And she made sure that Fin was breathing before she got out of bed and stretched her back. Pains, partly from childbirth, partly from getting older, she thought as she went to the bathroom to pee.
Two kids; little girls. Seven and nine. She thought as she sat, emptying her bladder. Just innocent little girls like Serena, only they'd been born into a life that was just horrible. Had she not escaped from Harlan that fateful day and ran out in front of Sam's car, Serena would have been born into that very life! She wondered about them still. Despite Kathleen's big reveal, her mind has been stuck on those children. God, what they must be going through!
Washing her hands, she wondered what would happen to them, though in the back of her mind she already knew. They'd try to place them in a foster home, or homes while they were going through therapy, but depending on just how long they had been conditioned it would end up a disaster. Especially with foster parents who didn't understand. They'd most likely be moved around or eventually end up in a group home. She couldn't bear to think of those children growing up in the system, or even worse- getting foster fathers that took advantage of their situation and abused them further. She quickly tried to shake off the thought, but she couldn't let it go. Why were people so cruel in this world? Olivia thought as she dried her hand and put on her favorite lotion before she left the bathroom.
She was about to step out of the bedroom to go pump when Fin began to wake up. She looked at the clock on the nightstand, 4:11 AM. Exactly two hours from his last feeding which he did not miss, ever. She laughed. Hurrying to scoop him up before his rousing turned into a full-blown cry.
She was sitting in the living room while she fed Fin, hoping that he'd get right back to sleep afterward but he was wide awake and staring intently at her as he drank.
"You know, when you look at me like that, I don't know whether you're trying to make out my face, or you're still angry at me for the whole pregnancy… I know I wasn't at my best. I wasn't with either of you. But I'm trying, little man."
Suddenly, a figure appeared on the stairs sitting down and peeking through the bars. She didn't know why she even bothered with the baby gate, Serena knew exactly how to open it and walk right through. Olivia was just thankful that they had soft lights on the stairs so she wouldn't fall when she came down and it was dark.
"Good morning, Mommy!" Serena tried to whisper, smiling. Her hair was a wild mess and she still had sleep in her voice. She was such a beautiful baby. Olivia thought. Always smiling so sweetly.
Turning on the lamp beside her, Olivia looked to see her daughter coming towards her. "Well good morning Serena." She said, giving her a series of kisses to her head as the child climbed up beside her and Fin.
"Good morning Fin," she said and kissed him. "Mommy, I have milk too, please?" In seconds, Serena was snuggled in and drinking alongside Fin.
Olivia looked down at her and couldn't help but imagine her life if she hadn't gotten away. Harlan said he'd give her away if she wasn't a boy, and she couldn't help but wonder if Harlan knew Abernathy and if so, was he the plan for her little girl, or some sick weirdo like him? Her mind went right back to those little girls. Seven and nine years old. She found out from another call to Barba that they'd just turned seven and nine in the last one and three months, respectively. And he knew this because Abernathy put out their "special" birthday videos every year. They're closer to six and eight than they are to eight and ten. They'd found videos going back to when those babies were as young as a few months in age.
How could he do these things? She never got used to seeing it in all the years she'd worked with SVU but this hit home with her. She'd never had her own little one with all the cases they'd worked, she'd never been raped and had a baby growing inside her that would have known exactly what that life was. She felt so disgusted and so incredibly sorry for those girls, she was crying and didn't even know it until Serena reached up and wiped her tears.
"Mommy?" The child asked, worried. But Olivia quickly reassured her that all was well. She kissed her tiny hand and proceeded to sing to her and Fin while they ate. This life would never touch them. She vowed. While at the same time, making up her mind that she would have Elliot talk to whoever was needed for her to get a visit with these girls. She had to see their faces.
…
"Carolyn, esto es una locura. Mami, sé que estás sufriendo, but shutting me out is no way to deal with this. I love you and I want to be here for you, baby...please call me."
He could go through a thousand lifetimes and he would never understand women. Yes, he is well aware of just how devastating losing their baby was to Carolyn, but he was hurting too. He just figured they could share their pain instead of her pushing him away.
Yesterday she called around lunchtime to tell him that she needed some time alone and to please give her space - they were going to visit her parents this weekend, how much space did she need? Nick wanted to argue, but he understood. Only, now, it's been a day and all night and she hasn't called. She won't answer her texts either, which was why he called her this morning only to be greeted by her voicemail. Maybe he'd stop by her work just to see if she's okay; as much as she can be. He knew that her getting back to the job was the wrong thing.
"Hey, Fin, do we still have the files on the Juarez case?" He asked as he knocked on Fin's office door. Fin was sitting at his desk, zoning out, and didn't hear a word that Nick had said to him. "Hey, Fin…" Nick said again, waving his hand in front of Fin's face which seemed to work.
"I'm sorry, what'd you say?"
"Fin, what's going on with you? And before you say nothing, I know it has something to do with Rollins so tell me, what's wrong man?"
Fin looked Nick over before he said "Nothin. What do you need?"
Nick took a long sigh. "The Juarez case-"
"FBI removed it and anything associated with it, remember. Why?"
"I got a similar case and I wanted to compare similarities."
"You think it's related?"
"I don't know but some of the details-"
"My advice, call the feds and let them handle it. If this case is related, they'll take it anyway, so save yourself the trouble… Nick, go home. You've been here since yesterday when you should be with Carolyn."
"Carolyn doesn't want to be with me, right now. She called yesterday and said she needs time to herself. Who does that?"
"Nick, she had a miscarriage. That can be hard on a woman. Just give her some space," he said and turned to his computer. "In the meantime, go home..."
"Can't, gotta call the feds, remember?" Nick said, backing out of Fin's office.
...
At Liv and El's, Olivia sat in the kitchen with Serena at the breakfast table, both of them eating while the baby nursed.
"Okay, I'll see you soon," Olivia said to Lizzie before hanging up. "Serena, guess who's coming?"
The child thought about it a moment. "Um, Santa Claus?"
Olivia had to laugh. "Not quite, Baby. We're a long way from Christmas," She said as Serena spooned oatmeal into her mouth and Elliot entered the room.
"Daddy, good morning!" Serena sang, seeing him first from where she sat in her high chair.
"Good morning princess." He said and kissed her.
"Elizabeth is coming. I was beginning to think you were dead!" Olivia swallowed a mouthful of fruit as Elliot leaned in to kiss her lips.
"I must have been tired. Hey little man," he said and rubbed Fin's head as he ate.
"We all got a late start, you're forgiven." She grinned. Serena offered him a spoonful of her cereal as she ate a strawberry and fed him as he looked at Olivia.
Was she…? He didn't even want to think what she had in that omelet but couldn't help but see as she shoveled some of it in her mouth.
"You do realize that you're still eating eggs...with strawberries and avocado inside?"
"Hey, you did this to me. Stop judging!" She laughed. Flashcard.
"Wectangle…"
"No judgment. None at all."
"...anyway, your breakfast is warming in the oven. Good job Serena."
"No strawberries and avocado, I hope!" She threw her napkin at him from across the room, hitting him on the side of the face before she went back to eating and pulling flashcards with Serena.
"Circle… mommy, my bowl is a circle!" Serena beamed.
"You are such a smart girl." Liv praised a smiling Serena who rewarded herself with a scoop of oatmeal.
"Genius, princess. And I'm glad you called Lizzie," El said to Liv. "You could use the rest."
"Not quite about that. I need to talk to you about something." Flashcard.
"Tri-angle…"
"Hold that thought." He said as he answered the ringing phone on the counter. "Yeah? ...uh, because my phone is upstairs. I'm not working, remember?" He said and sat his fork down on his plate and got up, walking the room. He was seemingly in shock at what Fennigan was saying to him and Olivia noticed, going over to him where he stood at the stove and taking a seat with Fin at the counter. "...I'll be right there." He said and hung up. "SHIT!"
"Don't say shit daddy!"
"What happened?"
"Abernathy's dead," He said in a subdued tone. He wanted to keep Serena from hearing, but Liv; it was a good thing she was sitting down because she felt weak suddenly.
"They found him in his cell a minute ago. I need to get down to the prison…"
"Why? He's dead."
"Yeah, dead exactly one day after he refuses to see me? Liv, they found him dead in his cell. The fucker was on suicide watch. I don't see how-"
Olivia couldn't believe it and turned to look at him. "How would you know that?"
"What?" Caught.
"How would you know that Abernathy was on suicide watch?"
"I…"
"You…?"
He got quiet. She got cross. And they stared each other down, he was nervous, she was mad until finally, Serena broke the silence with an announcement that she was done eating.
"I'll get her"
"No, you go do what your partner called you for, I'll get her!" Olivia said low and angry and went to the table, struggling to get Serena out of her high chair while holding Fin, and immediately left the kitchen with her once she did.
...
A bit later at the federal detention center...
"How the hell did this happen?" Elliot said, walking into what was Samuel Abernathy's cell. The body was still there, in bed and lying face up with a sheet now covering it. No marks, anywhere. No signs of struggle. It simply looked like he'd died in his sleep.
"That's what we're trying to figure out. He was on suicide watch." Fennigan said as he looked around the small cell.
"He seemed fine last night," the security guard said defensively. "He was in an upbeat mood-"
"I don't give a fuck about his mood!" Elliot screamed. "What I am concerned about is how the hell he was allowed to do this, he's supposed to be watched, twenty-four hours a day!"
"I was only gone for twenty minutes last night-"
"And did you even bother to check on him?"
"I... I thought he was sleeping"
"Save it!" Elliot snapped. "Richards, I need to see the tapes from when he went to bed last night, until this morning."
"Yes sir," Richards said, leading the way as they all headed to the security room. All the while he was laughing to himself that they'd never see what happened because he had erased those twenty minutes of tape himself and made a nice chunk of change for his trouble.
...
At the sixteenth, Fin had just left the building and was about to cross the street to the parking lot when Amanda came out of nowhere and called to him...
"Fin wait." He turned around, partly relieved, partly annoyed to see her.
"We've said all we had to say." And he turned around, waiting for the light to change, having missed it. He realized that he was still angry at her and just wanted her as far away from him as possible while at the same time he wanted to just pull her into his arms, kiss some sense into her and make love to her until he couldn't.
"I deserve that. But please, can we go somewhere and talk,"
No. If we're alone I can't control myself and I'll end up forgiving you. I'm not ready to forgive you. "About what? You're leaving,"
"I'm not…that's what I wanted to talk to you about."
"Don't stay on my account." He said though he didn't want to. He crossed the street into the police parking lot and she followed.
"I'm not leaving because it was a lie." Fin turned around to face her.
"What are you talking about?"
"Fin, please. Can we just go somewhere and talk. Let me explain. And if you still want to be done with me, it'll hurt but I'll understand...please?"
Fin stood a moment, thinking about her words, then looked at his watch.
"Alright," he agreed. Not really wanting, more like needing to give her a chance to explain. "Can you meet me at my apartment in an hour?"
"I'll be there. Is it alright that I let myself in?"
"Oh yeah...you still have my keys."
"I forgot to give them back…" there was an awkward yet hopeful silence between them. "Okay, so one hour?"
…
Over at Olivia's…
"Hey, thanks for coming last minute." Olivia greeted Barba with a smile as he came into the living room.
"Jesus!" He jumped at seeing her sitting and breastfeeding Fin. "Why can't I get used to seeing you...do that?"
"...feed my child?" She laughed as he kissed her cheek then sat across from her.
"So, I made some calls, they'll allow a visit but no longer than twenty minutes."
"I won't need longer"
"So where's the forty-year-old midget?"
"Serena is out back with Lizzie. Actually, she's been out for some time now..." She was saying when Serena ran into the living room with Elizabeth a few steps behind her.
"Hi, Mr. Barba," Lizzie said. Before Barba could say hello, Serena cut in.
"No, uncle Wafa! Mommy, I have to go potty- hi uncle Wafa." She waved.
"Mommy's busy with baby Fin, come on squirt," Lizzie said and took her hand, leading her away.
"Thanks, Lizzie," Olivia said
"I swear, that kid is the only kid I can get along with. So, you sure you wanna do this?"
"I have to know that those girls are okay."
"They're not okay. They're anything but okay. Tell me something, you ever ask yourself why Abernathy is in jail in Manhattan and not Connecticut, or why the girls are in ACS care here instead of Connecticut DCF?"
"I hadn't, but I have a feeling you're gonna tell me..."
"The FBI had been tracking him for months, and finally, they caught up to him with those girls at a posh hotel here in the city… Liv, he had pimped them out to a couple and the sick bastards were making a video when they caught them."
"I'm suddenly even happier that he's dead!"
"What are you talking about?"
"They found Abernathy dead this morning, and if you ask me with what I know now, hell has a new recruit!"
...
Elliot, Fennigan, and Fin sat in a bar having lunch over beers.
"Olivia knows," Elliot said in an unhappy tone before he turned his beer up.
"Okay, that's… how?!" Fennigan said.
"Paying too much attention when I talk… now she's pissed and I can't blame her."
"All this and the bastard's dead! I told you, man, you should've been upfront with her." Fin chimed in.
"I couldn't. You didn't see her these past two weeks. She's been a wreck ever since she found out about him. What was I gonna say? "Oh, by the way, I've secretly gotten involved with the case of the man who's been selling your videos."?"
"I did see her and yeah, she had a lot to deal with, but she could have handled it, El. You should've trusted that. Olivia's a lot stronger than you think." Fin continued. "The only thing you can do now is just come clean with her. Tell her why you felt you had to keep it from her and pray that she'll understand."
"And if she doesn't?" Elliot inquired.
"Then you, my friend, are ass-out! Seriously though, we have bigger issues,"
Fennigan was the one who said the obvious. "Like why does it feel like none of this is right? We've seen the video, nothing seemed off-kilter but still…"
"You can't help thinking that somebody shut him up, and if that's the case then who, and why?" Said Fin. "Maybe it was one of the rich assholes he pimped his daughters to on the regular."
"Maybe, or it could be the person who gave him those recordings of my wife,"
"Still with that?" Fennigan said
"You don't think it's possible?" Fin asked.
"I do, but…"
"But?"
"Think about it, who would have the desire and the chance?"
Elliot finished his beer. "I don't know. But what I do know is those recordings were under security in a federal evidence locker and somehow, a child pornographer from Connecticut ends up with them?"
Fennigan sat, thinking about it, "what do you wanna do? Abernathy's dead and the Bureau's gonna close this out before we know it,"
"Then we'll stall. Fin and I know the chief medical examiner, we can get her to buy us some time. One way or another, we'll get to the bottom of it!"
...
"It's been so long since I've been here, it feels almost foreign," Olivia said as she and Barba entered the ACS facility. She couldn't help but look around at everything. They'd changed it here a lot. New paint, new decor. It looked more child-friendly and the thought brought her happiness.
"We're here to see Mrs. Fellows. Tell her it's Mr. Barba
"Do me a favor, please. Don't get emotional."
"When do I get emotional?" She asked, already knowing the answer was always. Especially since-" Barba gave her a snide look as his friend, Mrs. Fellows made her way over to them, and from a distance, she looked Olivia up and down.
"Olivia?"
"Miranda?"
"I knew it was you. What are you doing here?"
"This is that friend I was telling you about." Barba started.
"You didn't day it was Olivia. I guess neither of us made the connection with our new last names..."
"Yeah, so can we do this girl talk some other time? I'm on the clock." Rafael said with a smile.
"Right. So I wanted to prepare you for this, but now that I know it's you, I know that you already know the deal." Miranda said.
"How bad is it?" Olivia asked
Miranda just looked at Olivia with sad eyes. Olivia got the message.
"We can't have male colleagues around them," Miranda said as they were walking down the hall.
"Can I ask?" Barba implored.
"The first night they got here, they said and tried some pretty lewd things with one of our crisis managers."
"But that was three weeks ago, they had to have made some strides since then…"
"Some, but not very many, I'm afraid." They stopped at a room with a large window that Olivia knew was a two-way mirror. "I'm sure that Rafael told you that we can only give you twenty minutes…"
Olivia was staring at the girls and her heart broke for them. They looked like two normal children. Beautiful, normal children, and she couldn't help but smile. Both had cafe au lait complexions with gorgeous heads of long black curls and big hazel eyes. They reminded her of her own baby girl.
"...yes, that's fine. What are their names?"
"Legal names, the older girl with the headband is Amiko, and Plum is the younger with the ponytail in front. Though they weren't aware they had names."
"What?"
"One of the strides I was telling you about. They hadn't ever been called anything but derogatory words, words that in their young minds were good words. We spent the entire first two weeks de-programming them of that and getting them to address each other and themselves with their actual names. No easy feat"
Olivia looked at them once more and took a deep breath before she and Miranda went into the room and shut the door, leaving Barba out in the hall to watch from the window.
"Hi, miss Miranda!" The girls sang happily as they both colored pictures they'd drawn on big pieces of paper while a lady sat with them. Olivia took off her coat and hung it on the rack.
"How are we today?"
"Fine," Plum answered, then came close to Mrs. Fellows. "Miss Miranda, who's this?"
"This is my very good friend, Miss Olivia. She wanted to talk to you guys today. Is that okay?"
"Yes." They both answered. Again, in harmony.
"Okay. Olivia, you already know Plum, and over there is Amiko. You guys be nice and I'll be back in a little bit."
"So, do you guys mind if I color with you?" Olivia asked.
"We don't mind. Come!" Plum said happily, taking Olivia by the hand and to the table.
Miranda and the other lady had hardly left the room when Amiko said shyly to Olivia,
"You're pretty."
"So are you," Olivia smiled as she sat down at the table.
"I am?" The child seemed happy at hearing this and lit up. No one had ever told her or her sister that they were just pretty. Pretty whores, pretty sluts, pretty bitches. But never just pretty.
"Am I pretty too?" Plum asked, hoping, and was rewarded with an astounding "yes." They both ate it up. The pretty lady called them pretty, and that meant the world to them.
"Are you having a baby?" Amiko asked, staring at Olivia's still rather large belly. Olivia laughed.
"No, but I did have one almost two weeks ago." This made the girls very happy.
"You did?!" They said, excited. "where is it?"
"He's at home, with his sisters."
"So it's a boy? We don't have sisters except for each other." Plum said as she held Amiko's hand and squeezed. "Are you here to film us?" She continued.
"Film you?"
"Yes. When Daddy or a stranger fucks us, they film it, but then the police took us away and now we can't." Plum said, continuing with her drawing.
"Are you gonna take us to the others, or daddy?" Amiko added. My little pussy needs attention." she spoke longingly as she put her hand over her crotch and, obscured by the table, she began to rub it through her jeans. Meanwhile Plum wasted no time chiming in.
"Mine too, Miss Olivia!" They said these things as easily as they were saying 'good morning', Totally unashamed.
Shocked, Olivia, turned to the mirror and looked out at Miranda and Rafael. She couldn't be hearing this. She'd never seen any case of abuse like this. Teenagers were the ones so damaged that they usually talked like this, but even so, there was a big percentage of them that were like children and were usually very closed off, quiet, and fearful. What the hell had this man done to these girls?
When finally the twenty minutes were up, Olivia had developed a sort of rapport with the girls. Despite everything they'd been through, they really were lovely children. They'd never been to school and couldn't read, but they were very smart. Damaged, but they still had their innocence that shone through the rough exterior. They were babies, and right now, as they said goodbye, they hugged her and she promised that she'd come back soon to visit again.
She was in tears as she watched them escorted out through the other exit.
"Are you okay?" Miranda asked, seeing her distress.
"Yeah, I'm… No!" And she fell apart, right there. Miranda handed a box of tissues and she gladly took one, wiping her eyes. "They're babies! How could he have done this to them for so long and nobody caught on to it?"
"Olivia, you know as well as- hell, even better than me that sometimes they just slip through the cracks."
"What happens now?" Barba asked.
"They go through more therapy and we try to find them foster homes in the meantime."
"Foster homes? So you're going to split them up?" Barba asked
"We have to. Can you imagine if we left them together?"
Olivia cut in. "Can you imagine if you didn't? Miranda, you can not split them apart, they're all they've got."
"What would you have us do, Olivia? We can't keep them together, you've talked to them. At least by sending them to separate homes we have a better chance of keeping at least one of them out of the state homes."
"Those little girls may be damaged but they're still little girls. You split them up and they'll be damaged even further."
"Olivia-"
"Miranda, what if...what if you had a home that was willing to take both girls, with parents that were trained to help children like them?"
"Sounds great, you find them and we'll-"
"I'll take them!"
Barba nearly choked on his own spit.
...
At Fin's, he entered the apartment and took off his coat, hanging it on the coat rack as Amanda came from the back.
"You're here."
"I said an hour. So, you wanna talk to me? Talk."
"Amanda didn't expect that he would be so right-to-the-point and wasn't prepared at all. She thought they'd talk about other things and slowly get into the matter at hand. She guessed not.
"Can we sit down?"
"Amanda...please say what you came to say."
"You're right. But first I wanna apologize to you." She came and sat at the island counter. "The way I went about things, I just didn't know how else to tell you."
"You decide to move to DC and what? It's like you worked all of this out in your head and didn't consider me,"
"And I'm so sorry for that. Eugenia told me she was dying from cancer-"
"Cancer-"
"She's fine. Turns out, it was a lie. I decided to uproot my life and go with her to DC, and she just wanted to get my kids and immerse them in her world."
"What?" Fin asked he was angry.
"She's always thrown little jabs that I can't raise them right because they're black; am I not doing a good job with my babies?"
"Amanda," he came around to her side of the counter and sat down on the other stool. "You are an excellent mother. Don't let her get in your head."
"They all think it. I saw it every time I'd take Mani and Trey to DC. They all hate the fact that I'm white and they think I can't raise Darrell's children properly because of it. I was willing to give up everything, my life, my work; you. I know that I hurt you…"
"You certainly did that…" He said, well aware of the part he played in being unfair. He overreacted, and he knew that he owed her an apology. But damn, how to even get into one? Fin didn't apologize, partly because he was hardly ever in the wrong, and partly because when he was wrong, the other person didn't deserve his apology.
"I don't know, maybe I hurt you too…" he said.
"Maybe? The last time I cried so hard, Darrell died…"
"You cried over me?"
"I cried because after I left your office, I realized that I loved you and it was about to end because of a stupid decision."
The look on his face; it was surprise and awe mixed with fear and the undeniable truth that he loved her too. He'd been in love with her for months but both of them being too scared to face what was blossoming between them…
"You love me?"
"Are you surprised? It's been coming for a long time, I just hate that it took me losing you to see it."
"So in a way, my reaction to the situation…"
"Fin…"
"I love you too. I've known it for a while."
"The thought that it took us coming to this to..."
He stopped her words with a kiss. He took her by the nape of her neck and before she had a chance to even finish her sentence, he claimed her mouth, kissing her deeply, his tongue invading every inch of her mouth as they stood up. They didn't need words as his hands began to peel her blouse from her body. She popped his shirt buttons in her rush to get it off, and undid his belt buckle quick. He pushed her bra above her breasts and finally lifted her to feast on her nipples as he backed her up against the wall, her legs around his waist and her skirt around hers. She was lost in the feel of his mouth and was pleasantly shocked when in one quick push, he was inside her, giving her no time to adjust to his size before he began thrusting into her.
"Fin... harder baby! Fuck me like you hate me!"
He wasted no time in giving her exactly what she wanted and began to bang her so hard that things began to fall from the walls. She loved it and was so glad that there were no kids in the next room because she couldn't be quiet. Not like this. Not when he was fucking the shit out of her! She'd be sore later, but right now, this felt too good as she humped against him with every thrust he gave.
...
"Okay, what the hell was that?" Barba said as finally, they pulled up in front of Olivia's home and he turned off the engine to the car and sighed.
"What was what?"
"What was… are you kidding me? You just told Miranda that you would take custody of not one, but two screwed up kids!"
"Raf, they're babies..."
"They're damaged, Liv." Suddenly, she got quiet. "I know your heart is in the right place, but these little girls, honey, you can't help them." He said pitifully as put his hand on her knee.
Teary-eyed, she continued to look out the window of the car as silence built up between them. Then finally after a long moment and with all the emotion, she'd hoped wouldn't come out…
"I have to try." She said, tears spilling.
"Liv…" he hated that he had to be the one to discourage this. Those girls did need someone like Olivia in their corner, but this was foolish. "You have to think about your children,"
"Everything I do, I do with my children in mind. Rafa, they're safe. Do you think that I would put them in danger?"
"You know I don't,"
"Those little girls need a family. They need someone who can love them and show them that the world's not just looking to use them for their bodies…"
"You know what I saw today? I saw two girls, who for the greater part of a twenty-minute visit went on and on about sex and how much they miss it. They're seven and nine years old, Liv!"
"So it's their fault?"
"No. I'm not saying that. They have been horribly abused by God only knows how many men. It's horrific but Liv, it happened, and they are screwed up because of it. What happens when they introduce Serena to that language or other things?"
"I'll be home twenty-four hours a day. Watching twenty-four hours a day. It will never get that far and they'll be getting therapy."
"Liv-"
"Raf, I'm doing this! And as much as I appreciate your concern, there is nothing you can say to change my mind."
"Then can I ask you something?
"What?" She was over it at this point and just wanted to go inside to her children.
"How much of this is really about what happened to you?"
His words hit her like a brick and reduced her to a stunned silence. Wanting to be away from him, she quickly got out of the car.
"Here I was thinking you were one of few who knew me better than that." And she slammed the car door and hurried inside.
…
"You in that skirt, my God!" Fin said as he came from the bedroom putting on a fresh shirt.
She sat up from where she was lying on the couch, with the throw covering her. "That skirt is ruined, but I had so much fun doing it."
"I aim to please!" He said and bent to kiss her.
"So what are you gonna do about Eugenia?"
"I'm gonna take a shower, go home, and love on my children. And when they go to sleep tonight, I'm gonna think of just what I'll say to that witch!"
'I wouldn't wanna be on YOUR bad side,"
"Why don't you come over after work?"
"Oh yeah?"
"Yeah. You can sleep over if you want; I mean…"
"I'll be there. But in the meantime, I gotta go. Lock up when you leave." They kissed again and he was out the door, leaving her full of glee as she went into the bathroom for a shower.
…
At the precinct, Nick was in the locker room when he decided to call Carolyn one last time. All-day hed thought about what Fin said and he knew that he was right. She needed time. As much as he wanted her to grieve losing their baby with him but he had to give her space. And as he dialed her number, he kept that in mind.
It went straight to voicemail. Again.
"Hey, Caro, I promise, this is the last call until you come back...I know that you're hurting over losing our baby and I just wanna say that I understand, and you should take all the time you need; I won't push."
...
After a long day, it was nice for Stanley to come home to have a nice meal with a delicious wine that could be enjoyed while he listened to some classical music. It's funny, he didn't actually enjoy classical music; couldn't even name a composer outside of Beethoven. But he thought listening to it made him seem refined.
"Abernathy is silenced permanently and my life could not get easier." He thought about how easy it was and laughed. "Best job I ever had!" He thought as he cleaned up his dinner dishes, then loaded and started the dishwasher after he wiped down the kitchen and turned off the light, going upstairs.
Once in his bedroom, he stepped into the insanely large closet to undress before he went naked to the adjoining, equally large bathroom for a hot shower. He did want to be clean for tonight, his lady friend would like that and he never disappointed the ladies.
Scrubbed clean, hair washed, and blow-dried, he marched into his closet and slipped into a robe and slippers. No clothes. They'd just come off in a while and he hated for his things to touch the floor. He headed downstairs in the elevator, lifting the secret latch to press the button for the hidden level- it's what he liked to call it since only he knew about its existence and he stood in silence for a moment as the elevator went down and finally arrived.
He walked the first ten feet of the downstairs corridor before he came to a set of double doors with a keypad off to the side. He stopped, entered his thumbprint and the doors opened revealing another ten feet of the hall that contained three plexiglass cells built into a circle. He walked down to the circle in the middle and stood there staring at the woman inside that cell. She sat in a corner, with a chain attached to her ankle. She was crying so hard, that she was trembling. Her food lay untouched on the floor in between the cell doors where Stanley had originally set it.
"It's amazing, if I didn't know you were down here I would never guess." He waited for a response but none came. She continued to sit with her head down and in tears.
"I have truly done something amazing with building this place, but I think you already know that/ at least I assume you've been screaming for release since you got here..." Still no answer. Just her the sound of her sobs. "You didn't eat, I see"
This time there was a response. "Please let me out of here!" she raised her head in tears and screamed it as she looked at him."
"Cunt, the only way you're leaving this place is for burial! But in the meantime, we're going to have some fun." And he again scanned his thumbprint going through one door, kicking the food aside before she shakily, fearfully stood up and backed further against the brick wall.
"Stay away from me!" she warned as he scanned his thumb for the second door and opened it, entering the cell.
"Or what, you stupid bitch!" He laughed as he took off his robe, standing in front of her totally naked. "Here's what's gonna happen; I'm going to fuck you, I'm going to fuck you mercilessly and do things to you that they warned you about, and I'm going to love every minute of it. Not only that, but I'm going to do all of this every day until you are literally begging for me to kill you."
She began frantically pulling at the chain around her ankle which she already knew was a waste of time, trying to get away. Stanley just laughed as he came closer.
"Why are you doing this?"
"Stop pulling the chain, it won't help" but she continued, more frantic as he got closer.
"SOMEBODY HELP MEEEE!" She screamed. In that instant, Stanley lost it and slapped her hard across the face, sending her to the floor sobbing but she had a strong will and there was no way she would let him win so easily. Quickly she turned over and delivered a kick to his stomach that knocked him off-center and sent him flying into the wall behind him where he crashed into a display of black, latex dildos sending them spilling everywhere.
She quickly got to her feet, looking around the room for something, anything that would help her. But he'd been diligent and left nothing to chance. As she again scanned the cell, hoping she'd missed something, a first came flying into her nose, breaking it. The crack of the bones could be heard throughout the cell. She fell to the floor, clutching her bloodied nose and he was on her fast.
"YOU FUCKING BITCH!" He said, his own fall having scraped this left forearm from elbow to wrist and some of the back of his hand. He was bleeding but he'd take care of that later and went to grab up and choke his victim who was screaming.
"So it's games you want, huh?" And he punched her hard in the stomach knocking the wind out of her. He didn't allow her to double over though, and instead, he punched her in the face, knocking her to the floor again then got down and grabbed her head, slamming it into that concrete floor and pulling out a handful of her hair in the process. He seemed fueled by her screams, screams that came out at the top of her lungs, begging for mercy but he kept at it. He ripped her shirt off, taking her bra with it, and proceeded to bite her breasts, drawing blood and sucking to get more. He was surprised when milk came out from her nipple and continued to suck one and then the other as she cried.
"Please don't…" she still tried to fight him to no avail and just for kicks, he punched her hard in the face and then the ribs. He then flipped her onto her stomach where he stripped her naked the rest of the way. She tried crawling away, her finger clawing at the floor, but he grabbed her foot and twisted it swiftly, breaking her ankle. The screams it emitted from her were terrifying, but he reveled in them, twisting it further after he broke it to cause more screams.
"You won't use this foot to kick anyone from now on!" Then got down on top of her, and covering her body with his, he forced himself into her anus and pulled her head back by the neck to arch her back, riding her mercilessly as her screams became sobs.
"That's right whore, take it and love it!"
...
TBC...