Insecure

Mae Hong Son, Thailand

January 26th, AC 199

The Merchant was a people watcher. He had been ever since his youth. He found the miniscule ticks and habits of individual humans endlessly fascinating. He was also a keen student of history. He loved the stories men told of themselves and their betters. Historians, it seemed to the Merchant, were infatuated with kings and nobles. So to have one, Rinus Van Der Deen, Marquess of Heusden, a living embodiment of that sick infatuation, in his possession was quite thrilling.

He had been watching the man keenly following the end of talks with the petty warlords of South Asia and the Middle-East. Rinus had said little during those talks. He barely even looked at any of the guests. And why would he? They were worlds apart. Anyone with eyes could've seen it not only in their dress, the warlords in their fatigues and dusty combat boots, Rinus in his fine silk suits, but also in their affectation. Perhaps that's all Rinus had left. The once proud member of Romefeller, reduced to being an international fugitive after the end of the war. Perhaps he was only ever as capable or as confident as his former master, Dermail, allowed him to be. Perhaps, he was always meant to be a number two.

Perhaps the man had no value. His promised coalition of former Romefeller associates never materialized. The Aristocracy was not in revolt, not in any real way, even with the prodding and antagonization by the Princess in Brussels. And with Toro Campana gone, he was the only tangible link between the Merchant and his operation and the Preventers. In all likelihood, whatever power or influence Romefeller had died with Dermail and Rinus was nothing but a vestige of an era long gone. Perhaps it would be better to just be rid of him.

Still, the nobleman amused him. The Merchant enjoyed the man's endless tirades and lamentations about the natural order and the glory days. Deluded old fool. But he could live for now.

The Merchant found him sitting out by the pool, ignoring the couple of young ladies that played in the water. They were gifts from the Merchant. The old aristocrat pretended that whores were beneath his dignity, and at times he acted like he was a family man that missed his wife and kids. But the Merchant knew he indulged in those young women at night in the privacy of his own quarters. They were of course, also his spies.

"The first shipment is going out today," the Merchant said as he joined Rinus by the pool. "We're making money again. It's not as much as it was, but it's a start."

Rinus said nothing. He his his grim expression behind thick black sunglasses, but what man of his age could hide such utter fatigue behind such a thin veneer.

"Come on now," the Merchant said as he sat down on the lounge chair beside Rinus. "Cheer up. We hit a little snag. We're fixing it."

"You said that years ago when I first came to you," Rinus finally spoke.

"And I still intend to deliver," the Merchant said.

"We've hit roadblock after roadblock," Rinus said. "Two years after Treize and Zechs, Dekim was ready with an army. Two years after him, we're barely ready for an insurgency, let alone a full out war."

"Is that what you want?" The Merchant asked, his voice suddenly darkening. "To end up like Dekim? To go out in a blaze of glory?"

Rinus looked at the Merchant through those opaque lenses, a stare that perhaps in another life, in another circumstance may have intimidated men. The Merchant couldn't help but crack a smile.

"Relax Rinus," the Merchant said as his joviality returned. "All is well. Just be patient. You will have your war."

Vustgaarde, Sanc Kingdom

The next day…

Heero rushed across the street just in time to catch Maxine and prevent her from falling over. The girl was carrying a giant pile of garment bags and shoe boxes that towered several inches past her head. She came bearing gifts as she always did once a week from the various brands and companies that wished to have Relena been seen wearing their products. Maxine smiled awkwardly as she regained her balance.

Heero had a way about him that he didn't quite recognize or understand. Even to those who didn't know his secret, just the aura of mystery made people uncomfortable and intrigued at the same time. Maxine was no different in this respect. The quiet confidence exerted in Heero's posture, movements, and graceful display of strength as he helped take out the remaining boxes out of her trunk before slamming it shut, bewildered and impressed the young stylist. Okay, I get it. She thought about what she would say to Relena at in that moment.

"Look at you all dressed up in the morning," Maxine commented on Heero's Preventers uniform. "Do the Preventers make you jog in uniform now?"

Heero cracked the smallest of smiles. "No. Actually, I just got here."

"Oh," Maxine said sounding a little surprised. "Sleeping at your own place again?"

"The princess needs her space," Heero said.

Maxine offered Heero a consoling smile before they both headed towards the door to Relena's townhouse. Heero pressed the doorbell with his elbow and a few moments later sounds of steps approaching from the other side of the door could be heard. The door opened and the two of them were greeted by Relena, her hair and makeup already done.

"Good morning," she said to the both of them as she stepped aside and to let them in.

Maxine entered first followed by Heero, who kissed Relena on the cheeky gently. Relena accepted his kiss gracefully before closing the door behind them.

"This is more stuff than usual," Relena remarked as she followed the two of them into her living room.

"I think they got wind of your trip to outer space," Maxine commented as she put her boxes down on the coffee table next to Relena's laptop and her stack of papers and textbooks. "Working late?"

"More like working early," Relena said, making her way into the kitchen. "I made coffee."

"You made coffee?" Heero asked as he put down his boxes on the floor next to the coffee table.

"Don't sound so surprised," Relena said as she reappeared in the living room with a mug for each of them. "I'm not that incompetent, Heero."

"And breakfast?" Heero asked.

"I made that too," Relena said as she leaned against the door frame that separated her living room from the kitchen. "Did you eat?"

It took a moment for Heero to answer. "No. But I'll be fine."

"Right," Maxine said, as she looked down at thr boxes. "Do you want to try any of these on?"

"Sorry, I can't," Relena said as she made her way over to the coffee table.

She began to gather her papers together and close her laptop. Heero went over to help but Relena packed her things away in her bag just before he could do anything.

"I have a meeting with the Progress they Vice-Finance Minister and class after that," Relena said. "Busy day, I'm afraid."

"Okay, I'll get out of your way then," Maxine said as she made her way towards the door. "I'll see you later, hun."

He was hoping that as soon as the door closed behind Maxine that the tension in the room between them would dissipate. Or failing that, Relena would at least voice what was bothering her. At first he thought her mood was possibly due to her period but it seemed to persist. When he broached the subject before, she insisted that nothing was wrong. Not wanting to incur her wrath, he left it at that.

Over the past few days things seemed to have gotten better. If she wasn't outwardly irritated like before, she was still rather reserved and a little bit distant. She said she needed time to herself and that perhaps it would be best if he slept at his place for a while. Of course, he complied. But it felt like banishment nonetheless. She was however, never mean to him. She accepted his kisses, his other little displays of affection. She cherished them all despite keeping him at arm's length. She just pretended to be busy. Perhaps she thought that he couldn't tell when something was wrong. He was often described as an emotionless robot after all.

She picked up her oversized purse and slung it over her shoulder.

"Ready?" she asked.

"Yes," he answered simply.

"Oh wait," Relena said as she rushed into the kitchen.

A few moments later, she emerged from her kitchen and stuck a piece of toast in his mouth, kiss him on the cheek before rushing towards the door.

Brussels, Belgium

They met at a bustling cafe called Montaigne at the edge of the financial district and the government offices. It wasn't a place that Une frequented but evidently Ingrid did. The staff there greeted her warmly upon their arrival and even addressed her by her first name, something that Une never experienced out in public.

The self-consciously high-end aesthetic of the cafe with its collection of art ranging from abstract expressions paint splatters to smaller folk art pieces that adorned the tops of the display cases promoted an undeniable sense of cosmopolitan indulgence. This was a place where the lattes had five descriptors stabled onto them and a single scone cost about as much as a full meal somewhere else.

This is where the young lawyers and the financiers of the capital gathered in the mornings to grab their fuel for the day before going off to their swanky jobs that paid more than they had any right to. A strange thought occurred that had the war continued, half if not more of the crowd of young professionals in that cafe would have come under her command. Either that or risk ignominy by not enlisting into OZ as respectable son or daughter of the Aristocracy were want to do.

Ingrid herself was once an OZ officer. She attended the Lake Victoria Academy with Une, although she was a few years older than Une. Although, unlike Une, Ingrid had no dreams of the glory of combat and the nobility of war. In fact, Une suspected that Ingrid secretly hated Treize and his ideals, and not just because Une chose him in the end. But it was what split them up in the end.

Ingrid had asked Une to come with her and join the JAG Corps, but Une refused. If any of their recent intimate encounters were indicative of something unfinished between them, Une suspected that Ingrid had never quite forgiven her for that. But perhaps, that she may still be in love with Une.

They sat down and promptly ordered something light. A coffee and a scone for Une, and a herbal tea with a bagel with cream cheese for Ingrid.

"So, how are things?" Ingrid said as she poured herself and Une some water that the waitress had brought to their table.

"Busy, but you know that." Une took her glass and took a sip.

"Actually, I don't," Ingrid said. "You've been avoiding my calls."

"My office has given you every bit of information you've requested thus far," Une replied.

"Piecemeal," Ingrid said as her voice suddenly deepened. "Our discovery process would go much faster if you'd just let us have access to all the records at once."

"I don't need to remind you that we still have an ongoing investigation," Une said, maintaining her composure.

"Well I need to put this guy behind bars, and so far all of his locations have turned up empty," Ingrid said.

"Yes, we're dealing with seasoned operatives," Une said with a hint of condescension as she took a sip of her water. "That's why we compartmentalize information in the first place."

"You don't seriously think there's a leak in my office," Ingrid said.

"It doesn't matter," Une said. "This isn't a matter of trust. These procedures exists specifically to negate the issue of trust."

Ingrid leaned back in her chair and folded her arms across her chest. Her eyes narrowed as she stared at Une. Une stared back undaunted by her friend. This was a game they had played since their academy days. There was love between them, maybe, perhaps, at least once upon a time. But there was always a sense of jealousy and envy. They were rivals and though they had not worked together in years, some habits die hard.

They were always sizing each other up in the old days. Who did better on this or that exam? Who had the better flight scores? Ingrid was a great student but Une was exceptional. One by one, Une smashed Ingrid's records at Lake Victoria. Perhaps that's what drew them to each other, the intimate competition of the mind and body that couldn't help but make them feel connected to each other.

It was harder now. Years later and worlds apart but such had been their pattern. For a time it seemed that the young protégé of Treize had won out in the aftermath of Operation Daybreak and OZ took centre stage. Une became Treize's second in command, and thus had direct authority over the Alliance's JAG Corps, which had been absorbed into the new order. But after Treize's death and Une's subsequent assumption of the leadership role of the Preventers, the ever ambitious Ingrid saw an opportunity and pushed herself into the right circles in the maelstrom of activity following the Armistice. Now she was the Advocate General of the Earth Sphere Unified Nation and Une was the Director of the Preventers organization. How their paths had diverged and yet their recollision into one another's lives somehow felt inevitable.

Their food came. Ingrid blew away the steam across the surface of her tea.

"That's a long way to say that you don't trust me," Ingrid said.

"That's not what I'm saying," Une protested serenely.

"I want to put this guy away," Ingrid said. "You know that right?"

"I do," Une replied. "I just think that's not all you want to do."

Ingrid set her tea down on the saucer. She looked at Une as a subtle but unmistakable grin appeared.

"I thought you said you didn't follow politics."

Boardroom A, Fifth Floor of the Extraplanetary Affairs Building

The tapping of pens, both by Dorothy and Cindy, against the glass surface of the table annoyed Relena. But she wasn't about to make a big fuss out of it. She realized she had been in a foul mood the last few days and didn't want to give into her base instincts. Plus, it wasn't their pens that was bothering her, it wasn't even the silence or the waiting. It was something else, something she didn't quite want to admit to herself.

The three of them sat quietly in the boardroom next to Relena's main office on the fifth floor of the Extraplanetary Affairs building in the Foreign Ministry complex. Technically it was a common meeting room for the whole floor but no one dared to use it, especially when Relena was working out of her office like she was on that day. Consequently, she could use it whenever she liked without booking it with the floor secretary first.

It was a large empty room with a rectangular glass table, with a holographic projector installed into the centre, around which a grand total of eight people could be seated comfortably, ten of they had to. The window which continued from Relena's office looked southward onto the dreary courtyard below that connected their building to the other buildings in the complex. In the summers, they would get a few hours of sunlight if conditions were right.

Relena sat at the head of the table with Dorothy on her left and Cindy on her right. They had been waiting for the Vice-Finance Minister, Ainsley Mortimer. She was already half an hour late. Normally, this kind of tardiness would make Relena fume, but as she was already in a bad mood and since this was Ainsley, she let it slide. Of course this was the type of thing she would do. Plus, she was already preoccupied with something else.

Her thumb mindlessly glided against the surface of her phone as she absorbed the contents of the screen that floated by. Each picture she encountered inspired in her a feeling of rage, envy, and disdain in varying degrees. Butt shot, selfie, food, selfie, selfie, gym selfie, clubbing selfie, gym selfie, butt shot and gym selfie, Alliance uniform selfie #tbt, oh and that gym selfie they took together a couple of months ago. That was her most liked photo too! Ugh. Tanya's social media feed was insufferable and yet Relena couldn't stop. She had seen all these photos before and it didn't bother her then. Why did it bother her so much now? And why was she being so obsessive?

She was sure that Heero hadn't cheated on her with Tanya. He was far too honourable for that. So why was she being like this? Perhaps they had hooked up before he and Relena officially got together? It didn't seem likely. Perhaps it was just that Tanya was the only person she knew about concretely that had shown any real interest in Heero and whatever women he had encounters with in the past were nothing but ghostly apparitions in her mind. Faceless hotties, with incredibly free spirits, badass personalities, and amazing butts. Her grip tightened around her phone just thinking about it. She was none of those things and it made her feel insecure. She hated it. She never felt insecure. Except when it came to him.

"So, what's she like?"

Cindy's voice snapped Relena out of her internal madness. Relena didn't immediately answer. For a moment, she thought that Cindy had somehow been reading her mind.

"I've met her once," Dorothy said. "She's intense, very smart, quite formidable."

"That's what everyone says," Relena said with a hint of disdain in her voice.

"So? Is that bad?" Cindy asked sounding genuinely confused.

"No," Dorothy replied as an amused smile appeared on her face. "It's just that Relena had history with Miss Mortimer, isn't that right?"

"We went to school together," Relena replied flatly. "She was a few years older than me."

"Graduated the year Relena arrived if I'm not mistaken," Dorothy added.

"St. Gabriel?" Cindy asked. "I thought you were the queen of that place. No offence."

"Who do you think she succeeded?" It was all Dorothy could to do not burst out laughing. "Rumour has it that it was not a peaceful transition of power."

Cindy too had to contain her laughter. Relena merely rolled her eyes. As if the mere mention of her was enough, they head the door open. Before them stood a slender man with longer hair than was normal for a government staffer but by the cut of his suit, his guest badge, and all too familiar smirk on his face, he had to be one.

"Avery Mcallen," he introduced himself as he hovered over the table and shook everyone's hand. "I'm the Vice-Finance Minister's Chief of Staff."

"I'm Dorothy Catalonia," Dorothy said as she shook his hand. "I'm Miss Relena's Chief of Staff, and this is Dorothy Price, Miss Relena's assistant."

"Nice to meet you all," Avery said as he sat down at the opposite end of the table.

"May I ask, where is the Vice-Finance Minister herself?" Relena asked, summoning her authority into her voice.

"The Vice-Finance Minister sends her apologies," Avery said. "She wished to be here today but was unfortunately detained as a meeting with the department is running long."

"Of course," Relena said under her breath as she turned her attention towards the files in front of her.

"The Vice-Finance Minister informed me that you have several points of contention with the planned restructuring of L2's debts," Avery said as he took out document out of his briefcase.

"Yes," Relena jumped in enthusiastically. "First, I'd like to point out that an amendment was made to the deal sometime around September of last year, changing the order of payments. The original plan was to have the pensions and other public funds be paid before the private bond holders. In the amendment that was seemed to have reordered so that the bond holders were to be paid first."

"Yes well…" Avery said as he cleared his throat and looked over the amendment in his document. "The government feels that it is important to maintain the credit worthiness of the colony cluster—"

"Let me make this point perfectly clear before we continue," Relena said authoritatively while leaning back in her chair. "Right now, in this room, I am the government. If you are articulating the position of your boss, you may do so. In fact, I encourage such candor. But do not hide under the cloak of government for your or your boss' uncomfortable compromises in this matter."

A silence descended upon the room. Cindy sat completely still in her chair, her eyes darting around until they finally connected with Dorothy's, who was trying to contain a smile. Perhaps, it was Relena's personal turmoil that was bringing out her confrontational side. Perhaps, she was irritated that Ainsley had sent her lackey instead of showing up herself. Perhaps, she just felt strongly about this particular issue. Perhaps it was all three. There was a reasonable chance that Ainsley still thought of Relena as the timid young girl from school that she used to bully and told her chief of staff that she was nothing to worry about and that he could steamroll her. She was wrong. In any case, the shiteating grin that Avery had when he walked into the room was gone. And in the place of the confident young chief of staff was a shriveling nervous husk of a man.

"Noted," Avery said as he cleared his throat.

"Good. You may continue," Relena declared.

Ixelles, Brussels

An hour later…

Duo woke up groggily from a deep sleep. He hadn't slept that well in a long time. For his grist few waking moments he didn't know where he was. The bed was unfamiliar. It was soft, softer than what he was used to. The sheets felt luxurious. He was in a bedroom he didn't immediately recognize. Light poured through the large rectangular windows that lined one side of the room. The room itself was large and rather empty. There was a grey lounge chair in the corner of the room and a desk and chair next to it. But other than that it was just the bed he was currently laying in.

"You're up."

He heard the door open. He turned to look at her and suddenly all of his memories from the night before fell into place. Evidently, they had one too many drinks.

Her demeanour surprised him, the confidence in which she stood in nothing but her towel, her wet hair messily resting on her shoulders suggested that she remembered the night before far more vividly than he did.

"Hey," Duo said simply.

She smiled at him warmly, although possibly teasingly. He had learned her subtle ticks over the past few weeks. He could tell when she was hurt, when she was hiding it, what made her laugh, and when she was having a bit of fun at his expense.

"Oh don't make it awkward," Hope said as she slowly made her way towards him on the bed.

"I'm not," his tense shoulders betraying his words.

Hope pressed herself against Duo, forcing him to lean back. She noticed how his eyes wandered and let go out her towel letting the front open up a bit before pressing her lips against his. She held that kiss few a while, her hand pressed against his bare chest, feeling his heartbeat, waiting for it slow.

"It was a really nice," Hope whispered when she finally broke the kiss. "You can relax now."

"I'm relaxed, I'm chill," again, his words still sounding rather inauthentic.

"Sure," Hope giggled, her hands still pressed against his chest. "You were more cool sneaking infiltrating a corporate headquarter than you are now."

"Well to be fair... I was under a lot of pressure?" Duo said, or perhaps asked.

"Which time?" Hope asked as she pushed herself up and off of him and tightened her towel.

Duo was just about to get up and chase after her when he felt his phone rumble on the nightstand. He picked it up and looked at it.

"Shit! I'm so late," Duo said as he grabbed his jeans off the floor and slid them on.

"Don't worry," Hope said absently as she opened up her closet and stared at her collection of uniforms, five identical jackets, with matching dress shirt and tie. "Une has meetings all morning."

"First, that's all really nice for you, being part of a special task force that you are," Duo said as he jumped out of bed and grabbed his shirt off the floor. "But I have a department head to report to, and second… you were saying about Une?"

Hope turned around to look at Dup with an expression of confusion. Duo tossed her his phone.

Vustgaarde University, Sanc Kingdom

It had been a long day. And class wasn't any easier. But that was fine. She needed something rigorous at that particular moment. If there was anything that could distract her from her discomfort about her situation with Heero it was her dance class. She hit her first successful grand jeté in class, a move that was not required for a class but Relena felt challenged to learn.

She did feel a little better after class as exercise always seemed to do, although her mind wasn't completely clear. As she towelled herself off and took a giant gulp of water, Lexi, her dance teacher approached.

"You looked good out there today," Lexi said.

"Thanks," Relena said panting as she struggled to swallow her water and answer at the same time.

"A little aggressive," Lexi commented with a smirk. "But I like that."

"Was I?" Relena asked. "Sorry, I didn't notice."

"Don't apologize, it's great change of pace," Lexi said. "If you don't mind me say. You're technique is always flawless but you do lack a bit of… confidence sometimes."

Relena looked down at her feet.

"Oh, I'm sorry," Lexi said as she realized how much the comment seemed to effect Relena. "I didn't mean it in a bad way."

"No, it's okay," Relena replied as she looked back up at Lexi. "It's just that… that's been an issue with me lately."

"What confidence?" Lexi asked incredulously.

Relena flashed Lexi a timid look.

"Oh… you're serious," Lexi said, as her voice suddenly deepened. "Okay, I'll bite. What could possibly shake your confidence, Miss Queen of the World."

"Can you keep a secret?" Relena asked.

"Of course," Lexi answered.

Relena let out a deep sigh, took a step closer her dance teacher, and gave her an embarrassed look. "It's my boyfriend…"

"You mean the guy that drops you off and picks you up after class?" Lexi asked. "The cute Japanese guy? Ummm… I don't know him but from what I can tell he absolutely adores you…"

"I know he does," Relena said in a soft voice.

"Then… what's the problem?" Lexi asked.

Relena bit her lip and leaned in close. "This is going to sound so stupid…"

Lexi said and offered Relena a consoling smile. "Things with boys often are."

"We've had sex," Relena whispered.

"Congratulations, princess," Lexi said.

"See, that's part of it right there!" Relena said, sounding a little more whiny than she meant to.

"Okay, I'm sorry," Lexi said. "Please, do continue."

"That's it! That's the problem, he sees me as his precious little princess," Relena explained. "He treats me so delicately. LIke I'll break at any moment."

Lexi put her hand over her mouth and tried to contain her laughter. That annoyed Relena.

"Okay, forget it," Relena said as she rolled her eyes.

"No wait," Lexi said as she gently grabbed Relena by the wrist. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't laugh. But you gotta admit, that's a pretty good problem to have."

"I get that," Relena said sounding a little embarrassed. "My boyfriend loves me too much sounds insufferable, I know. Which is why I can't really talk to anyone about it."

"So why is it a problem?" Lexi asked.

"Because he's had practice obviously! You don't just get this good at being a boyfriend without some… practice," Relena said.

Lexi stared at Relena for a moment before she realized what she meant. Suddenly, that grin that she had been wearing on and off through the whole conversation, slowly returned. "Did you lose your virginity to him?"

Relena nodded timidly.

"But he didn't lose his to you…" Lexi started piecing together what Relena had been dancing around this whole conversation. "And now you feel like a crazy girl because you can't stop thinking about who he's been with and what he's done."

"Oh my god! Yes! You get it!" Relena said feeling as though a weight had been lifted off of her shoulders.

Lexi stared at Relena for a moment before she wrapped her arms around her and gave her a big hug. Relena felt a little awkward but didn't want to often her dance teacher so she hugged her back.

"Honey… you just need to be more confident, show him that you're not just a little princess but a woman," Lexi said as she took Relena by the hand. "Come with me."

They left the dance studio and went down the hall and turned the corner. Relena had never been to this section of the athletics department. Lexi scanned her key card against the proximity card reader and after hearing a click and faint beep, opened the door. She stepped inside and turned on the lights. It was another dance studio, like the one they had just left. There were mirrors with barres mounted on them. But the ceiling was taller and there were several poles in the middle of the room.

"Step into my office," Lexi said.

The Upper House Hotel, Hong Kong

Tristan hadn't said a word all day. If he was trying to project an air of quiet confidence, he was overdoing it and revealing his nervousness all the more, Kerestina surmised as she watched him from a distance. He was too dressed up for the occasion. Not that Kerestina expected him to look like a common tourist with a visor, a baggy t-shirt, and a camera around his neck but the black suit and tie combination made him stand out a little more than he should. But it was a minor thing. After all, no one is ever taught how to dress appropriately for an assassination.

Of course, she knew. The black knee-high boots, skinny jeans, white blazer, and sunglasses, with her long black hair pulled back into a tight ponytail, screamed either assassin or high-end girlfriend. But in truth, she was neither. She had been a soldier and had killed a few men in her time, but it wasn't her specialty nor did she consider herself a contract killer. In her mind, she had just fought in the war like everyone else of her generation. She just found a way to make it her own.

Perhaps that's what initially attracted her to Vincent. They were kindred spirits. They loved war and fighting but hated the rigidity of the military. People liked them never lasted long with an conventional armed forces. So they jumped around, from place to place, army to army. There was always some army, militia, or rebel group in need of soldiers during that time. Their paths would cross. Sometimes they fought alongside each other, sometimes they fought against each other. But there was an intimacy between them regardless. Perhaps it was only natural, inevitable even, that such intimacy would be consummated.

She found him at the bar in the hotel lobby. He was supposed to be watching over Tristan but evidently day drinking was far more interesting to him. Vincent had changed. True, he had always been a heavy drinker and even his fits of melancholy were not uncommon in the time that she had known him. But this was different. It had been weeks and he wasn't getting any better. There had always been a fire in his eyes, an unquenchable passion, some called it bloodlust. Those people were probably right but Kerestina saw it differently. She saw an unbreakable will, Icarus before his flight. Wing Zero was the pair of wings he always wanted. Fighting and losing to Heero must've brought back some uncomfortable feelings.

She sat down next to him at the bar. The bartender came over. She smiled at him and silently dismissed him. It took him a minute but Vincent finally noticed her presence.

"What do you want?" Vincent asked, slightly slurring his words. "Aren't you supposed to be watching your little acolyte?"

"He's going to be fine," Kerestina replied.

"He doesn't know what the fuck he's doing," Vincent said.

"Then why are you sending him?" Kerestina asked.

"The old man wants Campana dead," Vincent said as he emptied his tumbler into his mouth. "Who am I to refuse?"

"Why aren't you doing this yourself?" Kerestina asked.

Vincent paused and looked down at his empty glass. His head hung heavier than it should have, betraying both the extent of his drinking and his depression. Kerestina looked away. She hated seeing him like that.

"Please…" Kerestina said, her voice shaking a little. "Take care of yourself."

"Oh, like you fucking know…" Vincent said as his vicious gaze met hers.

"You're not that hard to figure out, Vincent."

Vustgaarde, Sanc Kingdom

Later that night…

Relena waited in the foyer of her townhouse as Heero made his routine sweep of the house. He was taking his new position of head of security quite seriously, even if he hadn't filled out all of the positions on his staff yet. Relena was quite annoyed as it was late and she was exhausted and just wanted to crash on her couch after the extra dance lesson she had taken with Lexi after her normal class.

"All clear, ma'am," Heero said as he came back.

"Oh stop with the ma'am," Relena said as she rolled her eyes and walked past him into the house.

"I thought we were… being formal," Heero said as he followed her into the house.

"It's fine, Heero. It's just the two of us now," Relena said as she dropped her bag onto the floor and plopped herself down on the couch.

"Did you pack yet?" Heero asked. "Do you need any help with that?"

"Yes, Heero! I packed! I can do things for myself," Relena shouted at him. "I'm not completely useless you know."

"That's not what I meant," Heero said.

Relena took a deep breath and ran her fingers through her still damn hair. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell. I'm just under a lot of stress right now with school and this trip."

"Can I help?" Heero asked.

She stared at him for a moment. He stared back at her. She had never seen his eyes quite like that. Quite so open, so vulnerable. She melted a little inside. Relena understood the effect her mood was having on him and she was processing it as best she could. She didn't mean to yell at him. She knew he didn't deserve it. It wasn't his fault. They weren't together. She has no claim on those moments of his life. And perhaps it was time to let go of her childish fantasies, her naïve preconceptions about destiny and soulmates. They were together now. That's enough wasn't it? So what if they weren't each other's first. They would be each other's last. How could that not be enough for her? And yet, she couldn't put her frustration and anger away. Not just yet. Relena understood that her feelings were temporary. That this would fade like all other feelings. She was mature enough to understand that much. But perhaps not mature enough to be able to accept the fact that Heero had a past that didn't involve her.

"No," she answered.