Cinder jolted awake, blinded by the inky black web that enveloped her quarters. The night had been long and hard, and the murky abyss engulfing her at present was of no help. With a buzz, the lamp overhead shimmered with a dull blue glow. Cold sweat crept between the goosebumps that marred her skin.
She dreamed of three spirits, each more loathsome than the last. They gnawed at her dreams and fed her terror until she had been thrust from sleep. The first had been a black silhouette whose voice she recognized as Fell's. She missed her feint, and the silhouette ran her through. Jedi fell upon them both in a shimmering horde and carved them to pieces.
Ruin had been the second, an amorphous shadow of blue-black that radiated malevolence and mockery. He laughed at Cinder and laid her failures bare for her to face. "You will never succeed me," he said, cackling. "You are foolish and weak if you thought any I did was for you." He admitted gladly to leaving her for dead. "The final lesson, girl. I hope you understood it well."
A lesson spewed forth by the Force to keep me true. That was how she rationalized it. It was the only way she could. Surely he would not betray me yet? After all we have done, all we still had left to do?
It was the third spirit that left her reeling. Leide Pall stood before her, plain as day. Her mass of brown hair was tied back in a large braid ringed with emerald encrusted copper bands; the smaller padawan braid hung limp just off the side. Green eyes glittered against a face white as snow. The rest of her was a huddled brown mass of linen trimmed with lapin. Underneath she wore a tunic of white hemp with black trim festooned with wispy silver leaves. This was not the woman she killed on Korriban, but the girl she had known long before.
The dreamworld warbled as its black void shifted with blue and gold and white. Pillars of burnished gold sprouted all around. The sky opened up into a great blue vastness swarmed with clouds of airspeeders rumbling loudly overhead. From here, they were little more than the size of flies. The sky disappeared as walls built themselves up. Cinder found herself and the spirit girl standing in the atrium of the Jedi Temple back on Coruscant.
Leide led the way and Cinder followed close behind. I don't belong here. Everything was the way it had been all those years ago when she'd last been within these walls. To her left, scores of padawans made their way into the temple archives. At her right, children clad in polished chrome training helmets stood at attention as a wizened old Jedi Master regaled them with tales of ancient history.
When the girls made it to the steps leading outside , Cinder felt the eyes of Master Sivu Horace upon her. He said nothing, and turned away when she tried to return his stare. He was Leide's master and a friend to Cinder's own, though he had never been fond of the two apprentices spending their time together. I wonder if he ever knew, Cinder found herself thinking.
Outside the temple walls, they snaked in between a set of marble pillars. Leide leaned back against one, Cinder the other. Cinder twirled a lock of hair between her fingers. She saw the skin was supple, untarnished by Sith training. How things could have been, she thought. She was Lysara Synder once more. There would have been no Ruin, either. He still would have been Phanius, the unorthodox philosopher and resident thorn in the High Council's side. Perhaps things will stay this way, this time.
She felt her heart shatter when all played out just as it had all those years before.
Leide turned away from Cinder and looked off into the sky. "Your master is facing exile," she said, biting her lip. She always did that when she thought I wouldn't like what she had to say. "I overheard Master Horace in his chambers mulling it over earlier. His disappointment is stinging."
"They've threatened him before," Lysara said, "Hard discipline, censure, exile, it makes no difference. They always renege."
"Not this time." Leide shook her head. "The decree will come from the High Consular, to be issued first thing in the morning. I heard most of it... well, hopefully the important bits." As she let slip a giggle, her face brightened. "You know as well as I that Marvis can be overbearing when it comes to mindless legalese."
Lysara rolled her eyes. All too well. "Give me the Master Horace version."
"The council rebukes Phanius and his philosophy of reckless solipsism, and condemns him with exile and censure, effective forthwith."
"The same exact philosophy he's had for years?" Lysara scoffed. "They've let this go unabated for as long as we've both been here, and they're only just now taking issue?"
Leide leaned her head back against the pillar. She sighed deeply. "They said that he went mad on the council floor. He tried to tear Master Horace's head from his shoulders. He spat upon High Consular Marvis when she spoke of censure, and he drew his lightsaber in the council chamber when Master Janis tried to lead him away." She bowed her head, as if it had become too heavy for her to hold up. "Grandmaster Loras had to soothe him with a mind-trick, but it didn't hold for very long. He told them them that the old ways would lead to ruin, and that the order would fall beneath the weight of its own hubris."
She sniffled. Lysara looked away, staring at the sunset with squinted eyes. Her hand rested limp against the pillar. She tapped her fingers across it one-by-one. "Even a fool, the man is still my master."
"All the council said was that he had to give up his seat. He was still welcome in the Order, even if he disagreed with our tenets and methods. Master Horell even said that one day, Phanius might be proven right, as the Force works in mysterious ways." Leide chewed on her lip. "But that was before he attacked them."
"That it does," Lysara said, turning to Leide. She brushed a wayward strand of hair out of the other girl's face before planting a soft kiss on her cheek. "You know what happens next."
"What?" Leide's eyes widened. "It's not supposed to be a permanent erasure. They only wish to give him time to clear his head and work with the Force to better himself."
"Leide," Lysara said. She kissed Leide again and pressed a finger against her lips. "You know as well as I do they're bluffing. His pride is wounded. He will leave permanently.
"In his eyes, this is betrayal. His voice has been stripped from him. Now, he'll look for other avenues to proselytize." And I know all too well what he will become. "Many of the padawans and knights look up to him, you know. I fear the council is being short-sighted."
Shadows gnawed at Leide's face and her eyes drifted towards the cold stone ground beneath them. "But you'll stay, right? With me?"
"Yes, always," Lysara lied. She had never intended for it to become one, but it had nonetheless when Phanius brought her aboard his shuttle and refused to let her out. Or was it that I refused? The pain was dull and throbbing when Cinder tried to remember.
The lie echoed for what felt like an eternity. Everything stopped in that moment; all was frozen, all except for Lysara Synder. Then it all came crashing down. The world shook with a bowel-watering thunder, and all the beauty of the scene crumbled away to ash and dust. Coruscant in its splendor turned to the gnarled crags and vicious sandstorms of Korriban. Marble columns turned to decaying sandstone pillars, polished stone became cracked tilework overflowing with blood and sand. Fire and smoke engulfed all, and the stench of death lingered everywhere, vicious and pungent in its assault. In a single heartbeat she was Darth Cinder once again, back in the burning hangar on Korriban.
Before she could even think, Leide Pall was upon her, more vicious than any feral hound or Sith whelp could ever be.
"Liar!" she shrieked over and over again until she morphed into the woman that had stood before Cinder on Korriban. Cinder pushed her away, stumbled backwards, and snatched her saber from her belt. She slashed forward, but there was nothing for her to cut. Leide crawled forward on soot-covered hands, nothing more than a torso trailing cloven gutropes behind. She pounced again.
"I'm sorry," Cinder said aloud, before she even knew herself to be awake.
Her eyes strained against the blue light. She pushed herself up to her feet. Her footfalls felt heavy and awkward, like she was walking on stilts instead of legs. She trudged towards the foot of her bed. Under an end table that held a bottle of Fassan hypocras, there was a large trunk wrought of brushed black steel. She slid out of her sweat-soaked garments and slipped on a new tunic and trousers. At the door, she grabbed a set of robes and laced her boots before heading out into the hall.
After escaping the Hammerhead's hangar, Cinder left Fell and HK-47 to piloting and she retired to her chambers. When she wasn't wracked by night terrors, she spent her time in meditation. Some naive hope that the Force will show me what to do next. The thought made her scowl. It is useless when I need it most.
She found Fell and HK-47 where she left them in the cockpit. Ossus, the venerable orange giant, loomed gargantuan ahead. Craters and pockmarks littered its surface, glowing in searing golden light like miniature suns. Eons ago, one of Exar Kun's Sith set off a supernova in a nearby star cluster that wiped the system of almost all its life. The verdant forest world of Ossus turned to an arid wasteland of blackened trees and clotted dust, dotted by whitewashed limestone shells.
The perfect place to hide, Cinder had thought when she took Fell there to train and earn his title the first time. It still held true now. The Jedi will not follow us to this dead place.
Fell turned around in the pilot seat to face her. HK-47 swiveled his head a few degrees left to watch her.
"Just a few more klicks and we'll enter the atmosphere," Fell said. Any fear had left him, and his voice now dripped with a familiar youthful enthusiasm.
"Good," she said. "Where are we landing?"
It was the droid who answered. "Answer: I took the liberty of picking a clearing as close to the Great Library as was safe. The meatbag forbids me from accompanying you to the Great Library, so I will act as watchman and hunter for the camp."
Fell sighed. "He won't stay in the ship. I tried to make him."
Cinder chuckled. "Your first mistake was trying to command him. He listens only to me."
"Admiration: Master, you flatter me." There was the slightest tinge of embarrassment in his voice. "Rest assured, I will make myself useful and kill something. Witticism: I am afraid the homicide inhibitors you worked so hard to install can only work so well, master. The urge overwhelms me."
"If it moves us any closer to getting your assassination protocol back online, then I have no qualms." Cinder crossed her arms. "Just keep your murder to wild game and anything that threatens us directly. There is no need to go chasing after the Ysanna and risk their wrath."
HK-47 nodded slightly and returned to swiveling his head from side to side. He offered no commentary.
"Fell." She glanced towards the star chart on the wall. "Do you remember what I told you last time we were here?"
"Don't disturb the locals." The boy groaned. "How could I ever forget?"
"You remember then that the Ysanna are not mere backwoods barbarians." When last they had been here, Cinder and Fell spent their time avoiding the Great Library and the masked Ysanna warriors that swarmed the place. "You are more powerful now, and a man grown at that."
"Say what you mean, master." Fell prepared the ship for atmospheric entry and set it on autopilot so it could calculate the best possible route. HK-47 monitored the paths.
"Our objective this time is the library. I kept you away from it last time because I did not trust you. Prove that my trust in you is not misplaced."
"If they come, I will deal with them." Fell grinned. "I will not fail you, master."
"It's not me who has to worry about your failure." She walked out the door, back into the central terminus.
When she reached the holotable, Cinder paused for a moment. She leaned over it and thought about trying to reach Ruin via the communicator. I tore the damn thing out for a reason.A nagging thought still lingered in her mind.
What if he has betrayed us? Her mind was pelted at all sides by the inane question. She chalked it up to a lack of meaningful rest. I am shaken by all that has transpired. This shall pass.
She called out to Fell and HK-47 to fetch her once they had landed and not a moment prior, and then continued back to her chambers. She hung her robe on the door, and then took to her knees. She found herself lost in meditation.
Perhaps this time the Force will grant me answers.