Sorry for the cussin' in this one ... it's Andy's fault.

Season 5 - Episode 6 - two days after 'Tourist Trap'

July 26, 2016

"Finally, you're home!" Andy made a beeline for the door to hug her.

She held up a hand. "You may want to avoid me tonight. Or at least for a while." She kicked off her shoes and set down her things, "I'm sick and tired of men."

"Uh oh," he stopped in his tracks.

"Bad day and I dislike all of you."

He pouted but said nothing.

She moved to him and placed her hand on his cheek. "Not you … yet."

He arched an eyebrow.

"Oh, I love you," She leaned up, pecked his lips, and backed up, "... but I don't want to dislike you tonight, so …"

"What do you need?" He needed her to explicitly say what she needed because he rarely guessed correctly.

She breathed in. "I just want to be alone."

"You got it. Dinner is on the stove … it's done and on low .. I can go to Provenza's for a while … watch the game?"

"Sounds great. Goodbye."

She smiled as she walked past him, then stopped and turned back to him. "Take some dinner with you for you AND him … and kiss me again."

He walked carefully, slowly to her and puckered his lips. This had happened before … a few times, actually. He knew exactly who she had to deal with at work because he used to be one of those men. He'd had the day off today and should be glad for it, he assumed. They kissed quickly and he smiled to her.

She just looked over his face, then rolled her eyes. "Ugh, all of you, just … ugh." She turned and went to their room.

He stood, looking stupidly after her. He smiled sadly, knowing that he couldn't help her feel better about this … most of the men in her life were pretty difficult to deal with and she had to deal with the lot of them regularly. He moved around, tidying up, packed up his dinner, and grabbed his keys and wallet, quietly leaving her to her space.

She fell onto their bed and closed her eyes. She hated them all. Well, that was a bit much, Andy was a wonderful man who did not act as he used to … but he did used to be one of them. Was one of the prominent ones who never let up. Misogynistic, utterly helpless, unbearable assholes that seemed to try their hardest to push her to her limit. Rusty, she didn't hate, but her disappointment in his reaction to his mother's pregnancy couldn't be ignored.

She needed to call Emily. Well, Emily wouldn't make her feel better about this situation at all, but she could vent, at least. Emily and wine. Then a bath. A bath and wine. Then t.v. … and wine. Another reason she wanted Andy gone. She needed extra wine tonight.

"So she kicked you out."

"She did not kick me out," Andy clarified as he walked through Provenza's front door, "She needs time alone."

"What did you do?"

Andy plopped down on the couch. "More like … what did you all do today to her at work? I was off, at home cleaning, cooking, fixing the dishwasher …"

"Call maintenance … surely you didn't fix it."

"Shut the fuck up, I did. And don't call me Shirley."

Provenza chuckled and then honestly thought about the day. "I don't think we did anything out of the ordinary today … no more annoying than usual."

"Hmmm…"

"Oh, she met with the Chief and Taylor a few higher ups … probably their fault …"

"Mmmhmm…"

"So how are things other than her kicking you out?"

"She didn't kick me out. Things are great."

"You brought us dinner?"

"I brought me dinner. This is your house, what were you gonna eat?!"

"Frozen dinner in the freezer."

Andy made a face and they found something to watch. Patrice was visiting family for a week and a half and Provenza quickly reverted to his bachelor act while he could.

A while later, Andy jumped when his phone dinged with a text. He ignored Provenza cursing at the remote, or t.v., or both … and looked.

'I miss you'

He smiled. He didn't think he could love her more.

'I miss you more. I love you. What are you doing?'

'Bubble bath'

'Send a picture'

'No way, goof'

Provenza found the game. "You texting her?!"

"She texted me."

"I thought she wanted to be alone."

Andy smiled and shrugged a shoulder. "I guess she just loves me so much that she can't go a few hours without …"

"Ugh," Provenza interrupted and rolled his eyes. "You two are idiots."

"Still?"

"Always, now go heat up our dinner."

Andy gladly stood and went to the kitchen, texting her as he warmed up their meal because of course he brought enough for the asshole. Would he have if it weren't for her? Probably not. Men are horrible, he chuckled to himself.

'Are you having fun?' She texted.

'Are you?'

She grinned. 'Yes'

He blushed a bit, imagining what she'd look like having fun in her bubble bath all by herself.

'Wish I were there.'

'Me too'

She responded way too quickly.

'I can be home in 20'

She bit her lip. 'Mmmkay'

He sent multiple texts quickly after that.

'Are you kidding?!' - 'I kinda just got here!' - 'But I'll come if you are for real' - 'Haha come'

She shook her head. 'Stop' - 'I'm kidding'

'And drunk a bit I think?'

'That too.'

Provenza yelled from the living room, "The hell, Flynn? Why'd you even come over? Get in here with the food! Leave her alone!"

"Hold on! Impatient ass …"

'I'll let you get back to your fun, love. Think of me.'

'Of course' She rolled her eyes and took a gulp. 'I'm sorry, but I will be very much more inebriated when you get home'

He called her.

"Hey sweetheart," She greeted.

"Hello my love." He grinned widely at her silly voice.

"Why did you call?"

"I have questions and can't type fast enough. You sure you're okay?"

"Yes."

"What time ya think I can come home?"

She laughed.

"Let's go!" Provenza yelled at him.

He groaned.

"Whenever, Andy. Give me another hour at least I guess, but stay as long as you want. Going to sleep soon. You know I'm not mad at you …"

"I know."

"I'm sorry for the drinking, too, you know …"

"It's okay, we've talked about this. Thank you for thinking of me, but you can drink whenever and however much you want, I'm just wanting to make sure that you're fine, you know?"

"I am fine, Andy … just wanted more than a glass or two after this week … after today … nothing specific that I need to tell you about … just massive egos acting like school children and needing me to step in to moderate, then Rusty with his Mom's pregnancy, yes, you with your badge of justice jealousy this week, and don't say a word, Andy Flynn, I hit my limit. Needed to be alone, and thank you for giving me that … called Em, thought of you and missed you."

She was starting to slur her words a bit more.

"I'm apologizing in advance for my actions if I'm still awake when you get home."

He smiled. He'd seen her drunk and it's just adorable. He felt bad for adding to her long list of irritations.

"I'll brush my teeth for an additional minute so you can kiss me properly, too."

"I love you, Sharon."

"Alright, she knows you fuckin' love her! Either bring me my food and sit or bring me my food and leave. Goodnight, Sharon!"

Andy listened and smiled at Sharon's response, said "I love you and don't drink too much in the tub. Night, love." He brought dinner to Provenza and sat back on the couch.

"Did she tell me goodnight back?"

"You don't want to know what she told me to tell you."

Season 2 - Episode 8 - after 'The Deep End'

July 28, 2014

This couldn't be happening.

She is Sharon fucking Raydor.

He could not have fallen in love with Sharon fucking Raydor. He can not fall in love with Sharon fucking Raydor.

He watched her dancing on the dance floor with his new little grandsons and his newly betrothed daughter.

No. No. No. No. No. No. His lips curved into a small smile as he was transfixed by hers. Her smile, her grace, her dress, her mind, her laugh, her hair, her eyes, her wit, her silliness, her legs, her … legs. Shit. Shit. Shit.

He was in love with Sharon fucking Raydor.

Provenza was going to kill him.

This evening started out fine … with him not head over heels in love. He needed to get back to that mindset before speaking with her again. His heart was racing. He looked down at his water. He needed a drink. He met her eyes as she walked over, out of breath and grinning. He breathed out and stood to meet her … he guessed she was his 'drink' now.

Hours earlier …

"Wow." His eyebrows shot up when the door opened and she came into view.

She laughed, "Hi, come in … and thanks?"

"You … look … wow …" he followed her in and tried not to stare. She was breathtaking. The fact that she could look like this after the day and week they've had, just … wow.

"Hey Lieutenant," Rusty greeted from the couch. Sharon obviously wasn't 100% ready, rushing back to her room.

"Hey kid," Andy had to laugh at Rusty watching t.v., working on his laptop, and doing something on his phone all at the same time.

Sharon returned. "Rusty, leftovers in the fridge, do not order a pizza."

"Oh, come on!"

"Is her cooking that bad?"

Sharon gave him a look with a hand on her hip.

"She doesn't cook. I made it, but I don't want it two nights in a row."

"Your life must just be unbearable," Andy made a point to nod toward everything the kid had around him.

"Okay, okay, I get it. You two have fun." Rusty made a face. He did not love weddings. Well, he'd never been to one, but he was sure he'd hate it.

"Byeeee," Sharon said and ushered Andy out the door.

They moved to the elevator. "There's no rush … we're early."

She looked him over as they waited. "You should be there early, since … Andy, you are walking her down the aisle, right?"

"Yes," he seemed annoyed.

They entered the elevator, he pressed the button, and her hands went to his tie, "You look very handsome, father of the bride."

He grunted, but smiled after. She released the tie.

"Not sure if my 'wow' covered it earlier, but you look … amazing?"

"That a question?"

"Well, I mean, ya look gorgeous, beautiful, you took my breath away … do I say that to my boss?"

"Your 'friend'? Yes, you can say that and I thank you. I disagree, but thank you." She was adjusting her dress, hair … and she hadn't needed to. He'd never seen her this … just ... pretty.

The elevator opened and they started their trek to the car.

"I changed my mind, let's just go get dinner somewhere …"

"Lieutenant," she warned, walking now ahead of him.

"This is going to be horrible and are you going to call me 'Lieutenant' all evening?"

"Just when you're being ridiculous, like your last statement was …"

He held her door for her and rushed to the drivers side, needing now to speed it up … they were running late if he should show up early.

Driving to the venue was fine, but felt like a trip back in time.

"I cannot believe that I didn't know your daughter was getting married. How did I miss that?"

"I didn't tell everyone, not a big deal at work …"

"But you yelling at your ex in the murder room … you weren't trying to hide it."

"I can't speak to her in a lower voice than what I did."

"Well you better this evening."

"Nicole is used to the yelling … she's expecting it and already is prepared."

"Poor Nicole."

"I do try to not react to Sandra's needling and pestering and …"

"Okay, breathe, and try a bit harder tonight … Andy, I'm here to try and alleviate that … what's a good code word I can use that will remind you to breathe and calm down?"

"Breathe … calm down. I'm pretty simple."

She smiled.

"Look, it'll be fine as long as she doesn't speak to me much. Centipede."

She looked at him as if he'd grown another head.

"That could be the code word."

"I'll just say 'centipede' and you'll calm down? No, I'm not doing that."

He laughed.

"You'll be fine."

He breathed in and concentrated on the road.

"So, tell me about this step-father."

"Ugh."

"Is he horrible?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"Lieutenant," she warned and leaned her head back on the headrest, "... prepare me a little for what I'm going to be dealing with here."

"Fine, he's fine. He's a good dad to her and I hate him because of it."

She nodded, figuring as much.

"He was there for everything. He raised her. I let it happen."

"You could not stay married."

"She could not stay married to me. We shouldn't have gotten together in the first place."

"I'm sure your kids are grateful that you did …"

He only shook his head.

"How long were you married?"

"Twelve long, miserable years … no, it wasn't that bad at the beginning, and you know me … I drank heavily for the last ten …"

Sharon breathed in.

"Got divorced when Nicole was five … Sandra married the step-father when Nicole was seven. I chose to keep drinking."

"Hmmm."

"How long you and Jack been married?"

She laughed. Touche. "Well, let's see … we were married in '80, so we're going on a blissful 34 years now."

"Good lord, how did you, or do you still put up with him?"

"Well, he wasn't always so bad … and you know that he wasn't in the picture for most of it … we technically split in … uhh … '95, but he left when Ricky was … less than a year, so … '89 …"

"Shit."

She nodded. "He was in and out of their lives those first few years, but just gone from '95 and on. I'd have to beg him to call … I would send presents myself from him on their birthdays and Christmas … they probably still don't know that."

"So you had two kids under the age of five … you didn't want to get divorced, remarried?"

"No, for many reasons, but honestly," she looked to him, "It was easier for me to just be a single Mom than to deal with someone else who needed attention … more attention than I was willing to give. I was just fine. Emily and Ricky were great kids, I had a fantastic job with good hours and I spent every second with them that I could." She smiled over. "I was happy, honestly. I think they were, too … I mean, you can guess that I was a bit too strict, probably, so the teenage years were fabulous," she grinned. "... and they missed their dad or rather, the idea of having a dad, but they made it through … they turned out alright."

"They very much did. You know I'm a fan of Emily."

"Yes, I know, which is what reminds me of a statement that you made once about coming to me for advice if you ever needed it about Nicole. You didn't … about all of this, the wedding. There a reason for that?"

"It's been way too busy to bother you with that. With everything going on, Jack being around …"

She groaned.

"I haven't seen him this week, what's he up to?"

"No idea and that's how I like it."

He grinned. "He wore you out …"

"He was exhausting, yes. I was afraid that he'd get too close to Rusty, which I had a big problem with, but couldn't really do much about it."

"Just can't say 'no' to him?"

"He's charming when he wants to be and remember, I know him. I knew who he was. I remember all the good and try to focus on that with him because we were friends. Through all of it, Andy, we were friends. I loved him, love him … loved him," she corrected, "He had problems and made horrible decisions and abandoned us, so not the best of friends," she grinned over, "... but I've forgiven what I can."

Andy breathed out loudly. "I wasn't around enough to be 'exhausting' to her. I was invisible … and it was easier that way for a while, for both of us."

"You weren't just out drinking, Andy. You worked homicide then, right?"

"Yeah."

"You can't blame it all on the drink."

"I can't blame it all on work. I can't give excuses like that. Yes, I worked too much, and it was harder to go home after work than just … staying at the office after hitting the bar. Or staying at someone else's place nearby …"

She just watched him.

"I just keep thinking back and regretting it all, and this is her wedding and I'm acting like this, complaining, when I should be the one who's grateful that she actually WANTS ME here."

"Centipede."

He smiled over. "You know what I'm saying, though?"

"Yes."

"We're here." He parked and started to get out.

"Hey," she put her hand on his arm to stall him. He sat back and looked over.

She wanted to fix this for him, but she knew there was nothing she could do. "All of that … all of this we talked about, Andy … it's history. It was so long ago and you are a different person now. Right?"

He cleared his throat. "I guess, yeah."

"Tonight … all night … I want you to think of Nicole … only. Try to think about what she wants … needs … from you. This is her day, her night … she wants you here, Andy. That is something." She smiled proudly.

He nodded and went to open her door.

She wrapped her arm around his and they walked up the steps of the church. Of course, the first group of people they saw included Sandra.

"Last time I'll say it, Andy … centipede."

He breathed, smiled, and made the introductions.

This was the moment he fell. He realized it immediately.

She was indescribable. Remarkable.

Her ease with his ex and in-laws … she was charming, funny, genuinely interested in what they had to say … always knew exactly what to say back … even his son smiled when he greeted her … she was perfect.

He left her to them as he and the step-father went to meet Nicole and get ready. She smiled before he left and whispered, "You alright?"

He smiled. Holy fuck, she was beautiful.

"Yeah." Her eyes.

"Go," she laughed when he seemed frozen for some reason and pushed him toward the hallway.

She sat a few rows back and enjoyed the ceremony. Andy proudly walked his little girl down the aisle and 'gave her away', nervously looking for Sharon as he turned. Luckily, he found her quickly and moved to sit next to her. She patted his knee and smiled the most gorgeous smile he'd ever seen in his life. She was proud of him.

He now needed to see that smile more often … feel her pride in him daily. He watched the ceremony, but was hyper aware of the woman next to him. He realized that his life had just completely changed. Sharon fucking Raydor. He shook his head. Centipede.