A dog barked, then howled, the sounds crawling under her skin. She didn't want to wake up. Another stray joined in. Then another, the three canine voices blending into a mellow sadness. Bella shivered, blinking hard against the sting of tears. The sun had just broken over the horizon, shining bright and warm into the groggy world. She pulled on one of Jake's old black t-shirts and stared out towards the ocean. What little sleep she'd managed was haunted with the echoes of wolves. She rubbed a hand over her stomach in a silent good morning and hauled herself to her feet. She could smell eggs and bacon frying. She shuffled slowly down the stairs, grimacing at an odd, tightening sensation in her lower back.

"Hungry, honey?" Renée glanced up from the morning paper when Bella didn't answer. "Bella?"

"No," Bella took a breath and managed a smile. "Not hungry."

Phil raised his eyebrows and shot her mother a side glance. "But I made bacon."

"Thanks, Phil." Bella frowned as her stomach clenched and shuffled to the fridge. "I'll just have juice this morning." She always was in the mood for orange juice.

"Bella, honey,"

"Please don't call me 'honey'," Bella snapped. Renée blinked a few times and Bella felt a firm twinge of guilt. She set the carton down with a sigh, "I'm sorry, Renée. It's not you, it's just—"

"Jacob." Renée said stiffly. It had been Jacob's name for her since they were little kids making mud pies together. Her mother looked up and gave her a look Bella didn't understand. "Why didn't you tell us it was him?"

"You knew?"

Renée shrugged. "I guessed." For all her questions and curiosity, Renée had deliberately never mentioned Jacob Black and neither did Bella. Her mother must've guessed from the beginning that it was him, and not Edward. "Did you really?"

"I did." Bella folded her arms, her juice forgotten, letting her mother and step-father sit with the truth. She absently brushed at her shoulder. Unlike the scar on her arm, the pink mark on her shoulder hadn't faded. Sometimes she thought it had darkened, almost hot to the touch. Like it was now. "I wanted him."

"But Edward—"

"Renée," Bella blinked away sudden tears. "Please don't. Don't be angry with Jacob or Edward." She tugged at her shirt, dropping her eyes. "It's me. It was all me."

A thick tension bloomed between them as Bella waited for her mother's disappointment and censure. But it didn't come. They just sat there in the silence until a sudden sharp knock at the door broke through like a gust of cold wind. Phil excused himself to answer it, while Bella continued to watch her mother.

"Jacob doesn't even know," Renée said, finally looking up. It wasn't a question. Bella shook her head, her eyes filling with tears. "Where is he now, Bella?"

"Canada," a sharp clear voice said. Bella turned and stared as Leah and Sue Clearwater walked into the small brightly lit kitchen. "I'd bet money on Northern Alberta," Leah said. She raised her chin, studying Bella with a clear stoic kindness that felt like a burst of fresh forest air. "Hey stranger."

"Leah?" Bella couldn't make her voice work right. "Sue? You—what are you," Before she could finish Leah sprang forward and yanked her into a crushing hug, the kind that screams without words. Bella clung to her. "How did you know where I—"

"Your mother called Charlie." Sue smiled gently. "She thought you would want us at the end."

Bella shook her head, not quite able to believe what she was hearing. She turned to look at her mother, who was smiling sheepishly. "I thought you were Team Edward." It spilled out before Bella could stop it.

"I never said that." Her mother blushed a little. "I just," she shrugged, "I think he's handsome."

"He smells like a skunk's ass," Leah rolled her eyes, and grabbed Bella's wrist, pulling her towards the patio. "We need to talk."

Bella tried not to fidget as Sue and Leah made themselves comfortable. Leah was watching her with that singular intensity Bella had always admired about her. Leah's eyes flicked over her, "You're huge, Swan."

"Thanks," Bella rolled her eyes, grateful for Leah's bullshit cutting directness. " H-how are you? How's Charlie and," she bit her lip, "and Billy?"

"Charlie sends his love," Sue laid a gentle hand on Bella's arm. "He wants you home. Billy too."

Bella's smile tightened, and she nodded, "I know, but I can't Sue. Not yet,"

"Which is why we're here," Sue's voice was calm and soothing. "We're here for you, in your time."

"M-my time?"

"The birth." Sue reached out and laid a hand on Bella's stomach. "It will be soon."

Leah's hand settled on top of Sue's, and Bella choked back a sob. "I—I don't understand."

"There can only be one Alpha," Leah said, her eyes flashing. "And one Alpha female."

"Sam said that too," Bella hesitated. She'd returned to Sam Uley's words again and again and again. He was warning her or challenging her. The spot on her shoulder burned, and she rubbed it nervously.

"You, Bella. You and Jacob," Leah said it like it was a foundational fact. One Alpha, one Alpha female. I'm Jake and you're Bells. "Yours is the first pup of our pack."

"B-but what about Sam and Emily?"

"Emily can go suck a dick," Leah snapped. "It's you Bella. It's always been you and Jacob. Sam knows it, Emily knows it."

Bella hugged her belly tighter. I'm yours now, Bells, and you're mine. Maybe it should've been obvious, especially when she'd started to smell things she shouldn't be able to smell, and hear things she shouldn't be able to hear, and see things in the dark she shouldn't be able to see. Being Jacob's had changed her. That was the meaning of his warning before they mated. If Jacob ever returned to La Push and took his place as Alpha, their bond would become much more; an Alpha bond. Bella shook her head, sad, resigned.

"It's not that simple, Leah."

"It is." Leah smiled. "You'll see."

"Could you forgive Sam?" Bella demanded. "After everything he's done to you and just go on like nothing happened?"

"I don't know. Maybe." Leah narrowed her eyes, her grip on Bella tightening, "But I know Jacob—"

"You don't know anything." Bella said bitterly. It had taken her months to realize she knew nothing for certain, and the more she sat in her uncertainty the more fragile everything in life seemed. Everything except this moment, with Sue and Leah, and her baby. This moment was all she could hold on to.

"He'll find you," Leah's voice was firm, unwavering. "You're his. And he's yours."

Jake.

And for the first time in almost a year, Bella allowed herself to believe—to hope— for just a short moment, that Leah Clearwater might be right. That somehow, their bond would bring her Jake back to her.

Jake, come home.

But she couldn't let her hopes linger, and shoved them away. "You shouldn't be here," she said, but her heart wasn't in it. "Sam will need you back home."

Leah rolled her eyes, "You're such an idiot, Swan." She pushed herself to her feet and walked out towards the beach. Bella pushed herself to her feet and followed her. The sand underfoot shifted oddly with Bella's awkward weight, but she didn't fall. Leah turned to watch her approach. When Bella finally reached the water's edge, Leah let out a low laugh, "I thought you'd land on your ass by now."

"A lot of things have changed." Bella said softly. Most women struggled with their sense of balance when pregnant. Her balance had dramatically improved, as if she'd finally found her center, her gravity, and the world was settled around her. "I'm sorry, Leah."

"You should be." Leah had never been one to pull her punches or soften her words. For once Bella was glad. "What the hell were you thinking?"

"I—I guess I wasn't, really."

Leah scowled, "That's not good enough." She folded her arms "What the hell was so damned wonderful about your moody sparkle-boy?" Leah looked the same way Sam Uley had the night of her wedding. Cold and challenging. Demanding the truth.

"I don't know,"

"You do," Leah insisted. "Say it."

"I—I wanted to be—" Bella shifted, suddenly uncomfortable. She slowly lowered herself onto the sand and looked at her step-sister. Her friend. When had Leah Clearwater become her friend? "I wanted to be special. Different. More than just me, you know?"

"A self-centered klutz with emotional attachment and anxiety issues?"

"Edward saw me, he wanted me. I was everything to him," Bella shrugged. "He loved me, and that was so nice."

"You were a curiosity, something to puzzle and obsess over," Leah spat. "Like a rare painting or a sculpture or," she growled in her throat, " or an exotic animal."

"A pet," Bella chuckled.

"God, yes," Leah shook back her hair and sat down next to her on the damp sand. "How could you think his obsession with you was love?"

"I," Bella almost couldn't answer, shame clogging her throat. "I was seventeen, Lee."

"Like I said; you're an idiot," she snorted. "You're damn lucky Jacob knocked you up before that emo bloodsucker did."

"Edward couldn't knock me up," Bella grumbled, incredulous and annoyed. "He can't ejaculate."

"He what?" Leah's eyes widened and they stared at each other for a second before they both started laughing, deep belly laughs, over the absurdity of it all. They laughed and laughed, until they collapsed back into the sand, gasping for air, the tears rolling down their cheeks. It felt good, and right, and normal, to lay in the sand laughing away their burdens.

"I have three words for you, Swan." Leah was still giggling, "Dump. His. Ass."

"I didn't even have a chance," Bella turned a little and tried to punch Leah's arm. "He practically sprinted in the opposite direction."

"You probably smelled awful." Leah wrinkled her nose. "Like a wolf."

"That's exactly what they said."

"Damn." They were quiet again. Then Leah turned, "Do you regret it?"

"No," Bella pushed herself into an awkward sitting position and stared out at the sea. "And yes."

"I wanted to hate you." Leah sat up, her expression serious and sincere. Bella waited. "Except I can't."

"Why?"

"You smell like Jacob, like the pack, only not as strong." Leah chuckled. "It's kind of a—"

"A wolf thing?"

Leah nodded. "I'm pretty sure I'd murder anyone or anything that gets too near you right now." She smiled wide, almost bearing her teeth. "Protective pack instinct."

"Thanks, I guess."

They sat for another silent moment and then Bella heard Leah sigh, "I'm glad Jacob finally left Sam's pack. We left too."

"Left—Leah, why?"

"Why not?" Leah retorted.

"Who else?"

"Seth. He was so angry mom wouldn't let him come with us to find you." Leah smiled and Bella blushed. "Embry and Quil left too."

"Oh." Bella didn't know what else to say. The simple loyalty to Jacob almost hurt.

"That doesn't mean we're not furious with you. You have no idea what it was like for Jacob when he thought you'd—"

"That I would die," Bella finished. "When he thought I'd chosen to be one of them."

Leah nodded, "I've never felt anything like it." She picked up a small stick and began to rip at the smooth surface with her nails. "We tried to follow him, tried to talk to him, to help, but he wouldn't let us. And then he was gone. We could hear him in the pack mind for a while, but then he got too far away."

"Canada?"

Leah shrugged. "It's only a guess."

"Did he hate me?" Bella asked. Leah looked up, studying her intensely. Bella held herself steady. She had to know, had to see what she'd done, even if the truth cut to her bones. Leah would know. Bella bit her lip, "Please. Just tell me."

"Do you think I hate Sam?"

Bella frowned, the words hard, cold, demanding. "I—" Sometimes she'd thought Leah must hate Sam Uley for what he did. He'd taken everything from her, and thrown it away on someone else in a foolish moment of passion and heat, only to deeply regret it later when it was too late. He'd used Leah and then chosen another, and yet— "No," Bella whispered. She looked up, recoiling from the pain and anguish written in every line of Leah's face. "You don't hate him at all."

Leah slowly shook her head, "I should." She threw the stick she was holding—hard. It splashed into the roiling waves. "I tried." She laughed. It was a bitter sound. "But I can't. I hate him because I love him too much." She shrugged again. "It doesn't make sense, you know. But I still love him and he loves me. That's why it hurts." Then she grabbed Bella's hand, "You have a chance." She raised her other hand and pulled down the collar of Bella's shirt, revealing the bright pink mark on her shoulder. "A chance I would kill to have."

"Leah,"

"I'm glad it happened, even if it did break him." Her voice hardened. "I'm glad you're still alive."

Bella swallowed and nodded, unable to say anything. How many times had she wished she could go back and change everything? How many nights had she wasted mourning a life that hadn't happened? It was stupid to think about those things. Those choices were gone, lost in the finality of the choices she had made. All those decisions had lead her here, to this moment, on this beach, with Leah Clearwater. She was still Bella Swan. She was still human. To wish for anything else was to continue pretending that she wasn't responsible for the shape of her own life. Her fingers ran over the mark on her shoulder. It was so hot it almost burned.

"How long will you stay?"

"Until you tell me to leave." Leah stood and held out her hand, hauling Bella to her feet. "Or until you annoy me too much."