Yuri called Louisa every night. He asked her about her day and in turn spoke about his in the vaguest of terms. He could never tell her he was a member of the Secret Police. Even if he married her, that part of his life would have to remain hidden. How he would accomplish that feat living in the same house with her he had no idea.

He blushed at the thought of cohabitating. The idea of sleeping in the same bed made him light headed. He could conjure up and execute some of the most terrible tortures upon fellow humans but had not once indulged in the fantasies of making love to her.

Hell, he had not even kissed her yet. Not for lack of desire thought. Just a humiliating lack of intestinal fortitude and experience. Well, no experience at all actually.

Yuri had been so fixated on his sister, so unnecessarily devoted to her, he had not allowed himself to date. Not one girl. Many women had dropped hints for him to ask them out only to be summarily ignored. A few brazen souls had the courage to ask him to coffee or dinner or some other pretense only to be disappointed by his rejection. He had been purposely clueless because being with another woman in any way, shape, or form had never crossed his mind. Yor was the only woman for him.

Then Louisa came along. Without a doubt her looks which so closely resembled his sister's was what first attracted him to her. He had willingly admitted this to her. Rather than rejecting him, she accepted that and the ground rules of their purely transactional relationship. However, things had changed - for him at least.

On Friday night, Yuri called to ask her to dinner. When she answered, her voice was low and breathy. She sounded utterly exhausted. Although the response to his inquiry about her day came as a solitary clipped word, he could hear the quiver in the single syllable of "fine."

"Have you been crying?" he asked, his ear perking up to listen for inflections in her voice when she answered.

"No. Everything is fine." She sniffed. "How was your day, Yuri?"

Trained to recognize subtle changes in a person's voice to detect when they're lying, he knew she had not told him the truth.

"What happened?" he inquired, ignoring her question meant to distract him.

"Nothing," she insisted, sniffing again.

"Please don't lie to me. You're crying now."

"Yuri."

The way her voice warbled made his heart ache so profoundly his chest hurt. He rubbed his sternum as if to soothe his aching heart that beat faster as the silence stretched between them.

"Listen, how about I pick up some food and a nice bottle of wine?" Yuri suggested, but did not get an answer. "Would you like something chocolate for dessert?"

"That sounds good," she replied in a shaky whisper.

"I'll be over soon. We can talk about it then." He heard her fast, hitched inhale. "Or not talk about it. I'll leave that up to you."

"Okay."

"I'll be there soon."

Louisa did not return any kind of closing phrase before hanging up. Yuri stared at the receiver, wondering what could possibly have her so upset, before finally replacing it on the cradle. He glanced at the small square jewelry box covered in dark blue velvet sitting next to his hand on the credenza. Picking it up, he slipped it into the pocket of his trench coat before leaving.

~\'/~

Louisa had taken a long, hot shower foregoing a bath since Yuri was on his way. She pulled on a simple pink cotton dress with white daisies all over it. Shivering uncontrollably, she put on a sweater too; a white super soft fuzzy cashmere cardigan. She had been cold all afternoon since receiving the devastating news.

The knock on the door unintentionally startled her. Dragging the comb through her hair, she glanced at her red, puffy face in the mirror. There was no time for make up. Besides, Yuri already knew she was upset. However, she did put on a little pink lipstick to hide how pale her lips were.

When she opened the door she could not help but giggle because he was totally hidden behind the gigantic spray of roses in every color of the rainbow. It looked like a bouquet with legs had arrived at her door.

The flowers had come along with a large white bag full of food that smelled delicious. Her stomach growled to remind her she needed to eat despite not feeling the need to. She had not eaten since breakfast.

The day had eventful. Bill had stopped by her office early to discuss his almost debilitating fear of disappointing his father. Before lunch her two frequent guests were brought in. Damian had called her Uggo and told her that her art project was crap. In turn, Anya had called him a "dumb dumb dummy head" and told him he wouldn't know good art if it bit him in the butt. Just another day mediating their barbed words being flung at each other.

"Here let me help," Louisa said, reaching for the bouquet.

"Take this," he said, handing her the bag of food. "This is really heavy."

"Follow me," she told him, doubting he could see around the dozens of roses.

If he was speaking the language of flowers, she could not understand the message he was sending due to variety of colors. Perhaps he was confused about his feelings too and bought a hodge-podge to convey all of his emotions. She could feel her face warming at the very idea. There would be some comfort in knowing she was not the only one struggling to understand the state of her heart in this strange relationship.

"They're beautiful, Yuri," Louisa said when he set the bouquet on the table.

Yuri stepped back to admire the ridiculously large arrangement in a crystal vase at least two feet tall.

"Is it too much?" he asked, cocking his head to the side as if looking at a piece of art he did not understand. He had never thought much about his obnoxiously ostentatious bouquets he always brought to Yor until Louisa said something about it.

"Of course it's too much. But I wouldn't expect anything less from you," she said only half joking.

She stood on her tiptoes to reach the dishes in the cabinet. As her fingers brushed the edge of the shelf, he was suddenly there, leaning into her as he reached past her hand to get two of the plates.

"Thank you," she said, feeling her face growing even hotter when he looked down at her and set the plates on the counter. "Without my shoes, I'm not quite tall enough to reach. I never knew those few inches made that much of a difference."

"I'm glad I was here to help," he rejoined, his voice deeper than normal and a bit throaty. He cleared his throat and quickly turned away to hide the blush coloring his cheeks.

Trying to keep herself busy with the food, taking the foil containers out of the bag, Louisa could not help but notice the way Yuri took off his overcoat and took it to the hooks beside the door to hang it up himself as if he lived there.

"Would you open the wine, please?" she requested when he returned to the kitchen. "And get out the glasses."

"Glasses? As in me drinking a glass of wine too?"

"Just one wouldn't hurt right?"

"Just one," he repeated, smiling at her as he came to stand next to her to reach into the still open cabinet for the wine glasses.

"This looks amazing," she commented, concentrating on transferring the mashed potatoes and beef bourguignon to the plates.

"I figured you could use some comfort food. You sounded almost distraught on the phone."

She did not try to deny it. She had appeared ready to burst into since he arrived despite her smile and little giggle. He stealthily glimpsed at her out of the corner of his eye as he opened the wine. Since she did not say anything at all, he did not press the matter, but he hoped she would open up to him at some point during the evening.

Louisa tried to artistically arrange the food on the plate since it came from an expensive restaurant. She had recognized the name on the bag. Surely a place like that did not actually have take out, but they had made an exception for him.

There was a side of carrots covered in a brown sugar glaze. Her mother prepared carrots this way to enhance the already sweet vegetable to entice her to eat her veggies. It had been her favorite as a child. Tears rushed to her eyes making her vision blur. She accidentally dropped some potatoes she was spooning onto his plate on the floor.

"Oh, dammit," she grumbled irritably at her clumsiness. Hot tears stung her cheeks worn raw by all of the salty tears she had already shed.

"I'll get it," he said, reaching for the dish towel to wipe up the mess.

It was only a small dollop. No big deal. But he knew her tears were not because of the food mishap. He tossed the dish towel into the sink, leaning against the counter to watch her as she tried to act like nothing was happening, that there weren't tears streaming down her face and dripping from her chin, while she continued to place the food on the plates.

"Are you ready to talk about it?" Yuri asked, resisting the urge to touch her, to hug her.

Louisa vehemently shook her head. "I think I need at least one glass of wine first."

Deflecting. Her humor at such a time would be considered deflecting his concern because she felt uncomfortable being pushed to talk about her emotions. Ironic for a counselor. Talking about emotions was her job. But then again, they were someone else's emotions, not her own.

Being a top notch interrogator, Yuri knew a thing or two about psychology too. Understanding the human psyche, especially the response to pain and fear, enabled him to do his job and do it well. One would not have to be an expert in head shrinking or torture to see she was in deep emotional pain.

"Let's eat in the living room," Louisa suggested, opening the drawer to get the forks and knives.

"I'll bring the wine," Yuri declared since she picked up both plates.

"Oh, shoot," she muttered, sitting the plates down on the table. "I forgot the napkins."

"I'll get them."

She smiled upon recalling she had forgotten the napkins and asked him to get them on their kinda sorta first date when they had dinner here. Sitting down on the couch, she placed a fork and knife by each their plates on the coffee table.

"Here," he said, handing her an extra napkin to wipe her tears.

"Thank you." She dabbed her tears with the cloth then tucked it under her leg.

Yuri poured the wine in their glasses, sliding one over to her. He brought his glass to his lips but did not drink instead watching Louisa over the rim. She skewered a piece of the meat and stabbed it with the knife to cut it. The morsel was so tender it completely fell apart. Putting down the knife, she brought the bite to her mouth.

"Mmmm," she hummed in approval, going for a heaping forkful of potatoes coated with the rich brown gravy from the meat.

"Good?" He tipped up his glass to actually drink.

"Very good." She took another bite then asked, "What does it mean?"

Yuri brought the glass down from his lips, staring at her in genuine befuddlement. "What does what mean?"

"The bouquet. If you're sending a message, I'm not getting it."

"Hmmm," he mumbled pensively, gazing at the plethora multicolored roses. "Maybe I'm telling you I'm feeling so many things, I'm not sure how I feel about you." He took a long draw of wine from his glass. "Uhm, what about you? H-how, how do you feel...about m-me?"

"Yuri, I've been wondering...how old were you when your parents died?"

Deflecting again. That turn around was so hard and fast it almost gave him whiplash. He noticed her hand shaking when she reached for her glass of wine.

Yuri was thoroughly confused by her quick turnaround. Maybe she was making this about him to avoid talking about what is making her cry. The question seemed out of the blue, catching him off guard. Perhaps her question was strategic, a lead in to eventually getting around to whatever has her so upset.

Yuri put his glass on the table then sank back into the couch. Leaning his head onto the back of the couch, he inhaled deeply through his nose then exhaled a long breath through his mouth while staring at the ceiling.

"I can't remember really. I'm sure them dying while we were so young made things incredibly difficult for Yor. But she always smiled. She never complained. She had to go to work to support us. Although we didn't have much, I don't remember suffering or being without because she was always there...taking care of me...making me happy. I don't remember having friends. But she was there. I didn't need them."

"Yuri," she began softly, reaching for his hand lying limply on the cushion between them. He did not turn his head to look at her but remained fixated on some point above himself. "What else do you remember about your childhood?"

"When I think about my childhood, I only remember being with Yor. She was my sister, my mom, my best friend." He paused, a sad smile lifting the corners of his mouth. "She was my everything. I wanted to marry her...to be with her always. I could never see myself being with another woman."

Louisa mulled over his words without allowing herself to make the snap judgments that would only result in disgust. Looking at it from a child's standpoint with the reasons he just said, there was nothing gross or incestuous about it. Many children want to marry their parents and sex has nothing to with it. It has everything to do with love and always wanting to be close to them, to have that person in their lives. Unfortunately sometimes, as in Yuri's case, those feelings grow dangerously out of control and become an obsession driven by need and fear.

"She worked to provide a life for me so I swore I'd get a good job to take care of her. I wanted to quit school, get a job to make money, then she could stop working so much. But she insisted I stay in school, keep studying hard, so I could get a good job. So I did."

Most people would not consider his job good. He found and interrogated those who sought to take down their government, people who colluded with spies. He hurt and sometimes even killed people. The business of torture paid good money though.

Without lifting his head from its resting place on the back of the couch, Yuri turned he turned his face toward Louisa. Just like Yor, she could never know his real job. As long as they both believed he was a diplomatic liason, he could continue to look them in the eye and feel like he deserved their love. He could not bear disappointing them or worse disillusioning them so badly they would have nothing to do with him.

How did this happen? How did I fall in love with this woman?, he asked himself. It was never supposed to be real.

"But my job kept me away from her. Since I wasn't there, she found that man to take my place," he said as if to remind himself why he had pursued a relationship with her in the first place.

"Yuri," Louisa sighed, edging closer to him. She placed her palm against his cheek, smiling at him.

His heart smacked into his ribcage over and over. He could hear his pulse in his ears. Her hands were cool on his heated cheeks. Her gentle touch was comforting. He wanted to put his arms around her waist and pull her close as she gazed into his eyes. Hers were bloodshot, the brown iris seemed to glow, appearing more gold than brown after her tears.

"Yor didn't replace you. You will always be her adorable little brother who she loves very much. She will probably always be your best friend too. But she can never, ever be your wife."

"You're right," he said, placing his hand over hers. He closed his eyes while pushing his cheek into her palm. "Logically, I know that. I understand the reasons why I feel the way I do. I'm not a stupid man."

"I never said that. And since when does logic overrule emotion?"

"That's funny coming from a psychologist. Aren't you supposed to allow logic to be your guide? To make decisions and diagnoses based on what you know not what you feel?"

"That is true. But I'm not diagnosing you right now. I'm telling you, I understand why you feel the way you feel because of what you two went through together. But it's time to let go of your misguided hopes of her being anything beyond your sister. Stop hating Lloid Forger. Whether you like it or not, Lloid is her husband. He is the man she has devoted her life to now. Although she loves her little brother, Lloid is the man she loves and adores, romantically. Just as it should be."

"Just as it should be," he repeated with a low grunt as if the idea of abandoning his romantic ideals about Yor would be like abandoning their relationship entirely. Without lifting his hand from Louisa's, he slid her palm over to his mouth, placing a kiss in the middle.

Louisa inhaled sharply, holding her breath. A thousand butterflies took flight inside her belly making all of her insides quiver. She his eyelids slowly part to reveal his gorgeous eyes that were no longer shiny with tears but dark and intense as they stared directly into hers.

Yuri held onto her hand as he lowered it away from his mouth.

"Your turn, Doc," he murmured, scooting a little closer to her until his knee touched hers. "You accused me of knowing nothing about you on our last date so tell me something about you."

"Well, uh..." She cleared her throat due to her words sounded phlegmy and garbled.

She leaned over to pick up her glass of wine from the table to take a drink to wet her desert dry throat. Yuri still held onto her other hand. Keeping the glass in her hand, she stared into the remaining bit of wine at the bottom to avoid his eyes that suddenly seemed to see right through her.

"My father was a drunk. An abusive drunk," she added matter-of-factly but could not stop the shame from flooding over her.

Her father had always been a major source of fear and a world of physical pain for both her mother and herself. She had been told to keep her mouth shut, to keep their family issues secret. All her life she lived with the shame in terrified silence.

Her mother always tried to protect her, taking the brunt of his words and fists during his angry, drunken fits. But she could not always be there to act as a physical buffer and punching bag. His awful, demeaning words always hit their mark no matter what.

Yuri's fingers tightened around hers. "What else, Louisa?"

"I worked hard in school. Top of my class. I was determined to leave home and never come back." Her eyes slowly lifted to meet his. "So I did. I left and went to university. I worked two jobs to support myself and to pay for classes. I graduated at the top of my class like in high school. Neither one of my parents came to my graduation ceremony."

"Why?" he asked softly, squeezing her hand as if to impart his strength to her.

"I didn't want them to. I didn't invite them," she admitted, finishing off the remaining wine.

Yuri reached for her glass to set it on the table. This movement afforded him the opportunity to move even closer to her, pressing his leg along hers from the thigh down to their knees.

"So there was no one there to congratulate you? I'm sorry," he apologized not knowing why but not knowing what else to say. His fingers threaded through hers to keep a secure hold on her hand that rested on their thighs pressed firmly together.

"Oh, but there was someone there for me." She lay her hand on his forearm, meeting his curious gaze. "Professor Henderson. One of the jobs I worked was as a janitor at Eden Academy. He got to know me and eventually became my sponsor and guardian."

"Oh, I see," he murmured, turning his face toward her.

Louisa forgot to breathe again when she came almost nose to nose with Yuri.

"I'm glad someone was there to celebrate your accomplishment. Someone to say he was proud of you. I would have hated for you to be all alone," he said, tipping his head forward to brush the tip of his nose across hers. "And you've still never gone home to visit?"

"No. Not once." Tears started to leak from her eyes again.

"Why are you crying? What happened? Please tell me," he pled, stroking his thumbs across her cheeks as if to soothe her.

"Yuri," she whispered. "My mother died."

A sob broke loose from her throat, and he held onto her face tighter, pressing the bridge of his nose along hers and his forehead to hers.

"I'm so sorry. What are you going to do?"

"I want to go to her funeral. To say I'm sorry for not being there. To, to, to..." she stammered helplessly, dragging in a long shuddering breath. "To say good-bye."

"Then go," he urged her.

"I don't want to see my father. I hate him," she ground out through her teeth. "I hate him so much for what he did my mother. And to me. I can't...I can't face him alone. I'm not strong enough."

"You won't have to," he said, lifting his head away from hers. He kissed her forehead then the tip of her nose the way Yor used to when she tucked him in at night. "I'll go with you. I'll be your strength until you find your own again."

"Yuri, I..."

Louisa inhaled another lengthy, shaky breath when his hand cradled the back of her head. Her eyes flickered down to his lips that were slightly parted. She would swear every muscle in her belly tensed when his tongue darted out to lick his full lower lip leaving it moist and glistening.

"You will never be alone again," he promised her, placing a kiss on her lips.

It was the softest kiss Louisa had ever received. Although his lips had barely brushed hers, her lips tingled with excitement. Those damned butterflies flapped their wings until she felt dizzy. Closing her eyes, she waited for another kiss, her heart thudding fast and hard against her sternum.

When he retracted his hands away from her, her eyes popped open. She watched in bewildered disbelief as he walked across the living room to his jacket hanging on the hook beside the door. After fishing around in the pocket, he withdrew a small box - a ring box from a jewelry store to be specific.

Heat enveloped Louisa as if the sun were beating down on her like it had that day in the park when they took the ride on the carousel. She believes that was the day she fell in love with Yuri Briar. She knew she should not have allowed her emotions to get away from her, to give in to the sweet, romantic feelings beckoning her. Although she had tried to avoid tripping, when his lips accidentally touched the back of her neck, that was the instant she fell, and fell hard for him.

Yuri pulled the coffee table out of the way so he could get down on one knee in front of her. He opened the box, holding it out to her. A square cut diamond ring was nestled in the blue velvet inside. The day after he had caught sight of the wedding set in the jewelry store window, he went back to buy the entire trio of rings.

"Louisa Eleazor, will you honor me by becoming my wife?"

Louisa's shock widened eyes were fixed on the ring. She did not move or speak leaving Yuri to wonder if she had heard him at all in her present obviously thunderstruck state.

"I know this isn't the romantic proposal I promised. I really wanted to make a grand gesture. Something big. Make it special. I wanted it to be something you would always remember. This isn't how I wanted to do this, but the time seems to be right and - "

"Yuri," she said gently to interrupt his nervous babbling. "Who says this isn't romantic?"

"Well, I...uh, uhm..." His cheeks flooded with red color.

She captured his face between her hands, pulling him forward to press her lips squarely to his. The kiss was brief but conveyed a lot of emotion. Keeping her eyes closed, she lifted her lips from his but did not move away.

"Does that mean you will marry me?" he asked, his lips brushing against hers since they were still in such close proximity.

"Yes, Yuri Briar. I will marry you," she murmured.

Yuri kissed her this time, bridging the small gap between them to claim her lips for his own. Once again, the kiss was short, sweet in its innocent brevity. He sat up straight to take the ring from the box. Her hand trembled fiercely when he held it to slip the ring on her finger to make their engagement official.

"Do you love me, Louisa?" he inquired, gazing at her expectantly. "Or are you doing this to keep up your end of the bargain?"

"At any time, I could have stopped this. I could have said no, I don't want to play this game anymore." Her eyes danced back and forth between his, a smile curling her lips. Although her tummy flipped and flopped wildly with apprehension, she confessed her true feelings. "I love you, Yuri Briar."

Yuri grabbed her head, his thumbs pressing along her cheeks when he pulled her forward for a firm, powerful kiss. His lips moved across hers as he tilted his head, deepening the kiss. He kept his mouth closed for the duration of the kiss that took their breath away, quite literally. Pressing his forehead to hers, he continued to hold her head as they both panted for air, winded not only from their amorous actions but also from the good but heavy emotions that were weighing down on them.

"I love you too, Louisa. I'm so happy you're going to be my wife."