Emily Locke had her horrible Monday start off with a broken alarm clock that didn't wake her up at the correct time, a snapped heel due to clumsily stepping off the street curb which forced her to dash back to her apartment for a new pair of shoes, and the barista at Starbucks forgot again how she liked her coffee. And now, after finally getting to the Wayne Security office at least an hour late, did the Director for Research & Development find her underlings hard at work dreaming up the latest profitable product to protect the citizens of Charm City against the local supervillains?

No, those idiots were instead huddled together at a half-hearted attempt at concealment, peeking over a cubicle wall at something out in the middle of the office area.

Coming up unnoticed behind Ron, Teddy, and Wendy, Emily tried to say menacingly to these three slackers but only managed a curious, "What's going on?"

"Shhhh!" was simultaneously hissed at Emily without any of them turning around. Rather, Teddy even reached out a hand without looking to grab Emily's arm and dragging her up to join the group.

After letting go of a startled Emily, Teddy then discreetly pointed over the cubicle wall edge, "We just found the latest infiltrator!"

"Huh?"

In response to that very confused response from Emily, Ron nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah, every year around this month, some bad guy sneaks in under a cover name and disguise and tries to catch an advance peek at our latest stuff so they can plan ahead on how to thwart it!"

Trying not to think about how easily Ron had just used the word 'thwart' like it was part of his normal vocabulary, Emily focused on something else. "You mean, this is usual?"

Wendy joined in their increasingly surreal conversation then. "Sure. Last time, it was Kid Whiz, right, guys?"

Emily carefully repeated, "Kid…Whiz."

"Yup," Ron confirmed. He looked at Emily's baffled expression and felt further clarification was obviously needed.

"Haven't heard about him yet? He was just an ordinary two-year-old toddler until his family went on vacation in Metropolis. Playing in one of the parks there, he found a little piece of Brainiac's exploded spaceship and promptly stuck it in his mouth. Well, like these things happen, it instantly increased his intelligence a hundred times over and turned him into another evil mad-scientist type. Of course, Kid Whiz still needs naptimes and cookie breaks in between plotting to take over the world."

Teddy contributed, "Oh, and don't make any jokes about his last name. You know, taking a wiz, that kind of stuff. He'd be the first one to tell you he's out of Pampers now."

Emily stared at them all. They were actually serious.

Thinking it over, Emily couldn't help saying, "You said he's the one who tried it here last time? How could anyone possibly miss a little boy snooping around—"

"Uh-huh," Wendy interrupted in disagreement. "He built a full-size robot looking just like the seventies-style hunk on the Brawny paper towels and controlled it while riding in the robot's stomach."

Ron had a somewhat strange expression flash over his face then, composed of half admiration and half criticism. "It was actually going pretty good, right up to the point when the robot's mustache fell off his face. He might've gotten away with that even then, except nobody could miss a little arm poking out of a flannelled stomach to snatch off from Jackie's desk her chocolate pudding cup. Let me tell you, you do not ever want to mess with that woman's lunch dessert."

Emily took a deep breath and tried to bring things back down to earth. "So, who's it now?"

Following how Wendy, Ron, and Teddy immediately pointed in the same direction over the cubicle wall, Emily followed their indicating fingers to…the mail guy?

Xander Harris was not having the best of days, either. After experiencing yet again one of those Wacky Portal Mishaps™, he'd wound up in the DC Universe.

Okay, okay, so there were a couple minutes of intense fanboy squeeing around then, until Xander finally realized just how much he was screwed now. Every piece of comic book information stuffed in his head about this world due to years of reading those four-color art publications about the adventures of Superman, Batman, the Justice League, et al?

All it'd take was one single slip in revealing the multitude of secret identities he knew, and bingo, somebody like Gorilla Grodd would be telepathically strip-mining his mind. Afterwards, the best Xander could hope for was that he'd be left as nothing more than a drooling idiot with definite bladder control problems.

The good guys would be a bit more humane, of course, but before you could say 'protective custody', he'd be in a comfortable jail cell at the Watchtower being resolutely interrogated by some dude in a bat-themed costume holding a list of questions. A very long list.

No way. Fortunately, Willow managed to contact him through her magic from their home dimension, but it hadn't been easy even with every bit of her mojo. A quick message accompanied by a care package had been sent through from the New Council's headquarters telling Xander she could get him back eventually, but it wouldn't happen until a couple of months from now. Apparently, the cycles of reality wouldn't properly intersect until then, or some other magic-babble like that.

Anyhow, Wils agreed the smart thing to do for her yellow-crayon friend was to stay inconspicuous for the present. This meant no visits to Metropolis or Gotham City, plus doing anything else to attract the attention of this world's heroes and villains.

About the only good point was that Xander was currently stuck in a place called Charm City, which was this country's version of Passaic, New Jersey. A totally forgettable place, even if it was a good-sized town. As long as he was careful, Xander could live there quietly while waiting for Willow to return him home.

The care package sent by Wils included a set of magical identity documents which had established him as completely ordinary American citizen, with an accompanying mundane life story. However, the Red Witch didn't dare to provide Xander with any kind of enchanted money, either through a bank account, credit cards, or in real cash. Not when that could really get Xander in trouble with the law due to charges of theft or counterfeiting.

So…he needed to find a job to tide him over. Which Xander did. In turn, causing the one-eyed man a conniption fit when the temp agency he'd signed up with sent their newest employee on his very first day to some place called Wayne Securities. As in a subsidiary of Wayne Enterprises. As in Bruce Wayne, alias The Batman.

This was staying inconspicuous? Brooding about the whole stupid situation while he pushed a mail cart around assorted floors of an office building, Xander grumpily handed out packages until in the course of events something caught his notice from the corner of this New Council troubleshooter's remaining eye without him showing any presumed awareness of the latest bout of weirdness.

From behind one of the surrounding cubicles, four assorted people were cautiously watching Xander Harris.

Now what?